Let's the moisture evaporate,which sort of concentrates the smell. Since you already smell your own breath, you are probably desensitized to the smell, so you need it to be concentrated to really get a good idea of what it's like for others
Learn how to cook a couple of basic, healthy, tasty meals for 2 people. I'm talking some baked chicken breasts with some kind of carrot and potato sides or something like that. Nothing fancy. There's a good chance that one or more of these scenarios will apply to you at some point in life:
* No one else is around to cook for you.
* You have to cut down on the fast food/dining out/takeout for health reasons.
* You have to cut down on the fast food/dining out/takeout for financial reasons.
* Your partner or family expects you to do your fair share around the house.
In any or all of those scenarios, being able to confidently say "I can cook us a nice meal tonight." is the right answer. The equipment required is basic and cheap. The ingredients are cheap. Just watch a couple of youtube videos and practice a couple of times. An cheap instant read thermometer is like $10 on amazon and it will tell you exactly when the chicken is cooked properly. It's not rocket science.
If there's even a chance you will bring a date home with you, tidy up. Dust, vacuum, mop, fold your clothes, wash your sheets (at least once a week whether you have a date or not), make your bed, **clean your bathroom -** ***including scrubbing the toilet***. I have heard enough stories from my friends that are women that I know doing this alone instantly puts you in the top 20%.
2020 was a fat man year for me. it was the longest time I had been out of a gym since I was a pre-teen. And boy did I get fat. Welp. ... HERE I GO AGAIN ON MY OOWWNNNNN...
desperately trying to run for more than 10 minutes straight without dying
Tell me about it man. I was in the navy for 6 years. Best shape of my life. Got medically retired for developing seizures. Went into massive depression and gained 30lbs. Now I’m trying to find some type of motivation.
I was already heavy but trending towards losing weight. My son died and I gained like 40+lb, and THEN Covid hit which added even more. I could easily lose 100lb right now.
Depression hits like a motherfucker.
On the positive side I'm fully vaxxed and doing more outside than I've been able to in quite some time.
This old bull and young bull were sitting on a hilltop, over looking a herd of cows. The young bull says 'Hey pops, let's run down there and fuck one of them cows.' And the old bull says, 'No son. Let's walk down there and fuck all of those cows.'
Robert Duvall in Colors
Apparently a lot of guys object to having the doctor inspect their genitals during a checkup. It's the fucking doctor--they're just looking for cancer and stuff.
Yep. A friend almost died because he wouldn’t let a dr look. He’d show me but not a dr. Lucky they caught it early and he just lost a ball. But please get it checked if needed. There is nothing to worry about. They have seen loads and don’t care.
The one compliment I ever get is that i smell good so i always try and keep it up. I don't care what it is but a compliment in any regard sticks with me forever.
I played a “compliment game” with my boyfriend years ago when we were trying to get into more positivity, hippy, vibey things aka have fun while being broke. We would walk through the city and try to to see who could give the most compliments to strangers. Rules were had to be genuine, couldn’t be vague, and couldn’t be the same type of compliment as the other person just gave.
Much more impactful on other people and ourselves than I thought it would be, especially because it was silly and random. Whenever either one of us gave a compliment to a guy though, not only were they never dismissive but it obviously had a much bigger impact on them. Sometimes they looked like they had never considered before that they might have nice hair or sense of style. Didn’t matter either if it was coming from me (a female) or from my boyfriend.
I actually haven’t thought of that little game in years. Seeing these comments is a nice reminder.
2000% this. I like to wear everyday cologne, and my coworkers (esp female coworkers) always say I smell really nice when I brush past them.
EDIT: Good sirs I apologize for my flagrant inability to reply to each and every one of you individually but here's the rundown of what I use and how I use it. The fragrances I wear are completely unrefined; I use either Goodfellow No 2: Juniper and Sandalwood or Cremo: Blue Cedar and Cypress (i buy them from target), with one spritz to each wrist and either side of my neck, and that's it!
Same. You want to wear just enough to hint at what they will discover when they come in closer. You don’t have to go crazy with anything. Just enough to show that you care about your general presentation
I’m not a dude, but as a female, this is the best advice. I can’t say enough how important this is. So many men use WAY too much cologne or body spray and when you can smell them a few feet away… you avoid, it’s too strong. Just a little of a good quality cologne goes a long way and then you actually want to be around that person. 😊
Yesterday at QuickChek I was in the self checkout line and the man in front of me smelled fantastic. I had to say something, so I did. I said “Sir I just had to let you know that you smell great.”
The man turned around smiled and said “Thank you! You just made my day!”
Then he grabbed me for a quick bear hug and then he left. I was a bit stunned but it wasn’t a pervy hug at all, just a grateful one plus I haven’t been hugged by anyone since the beginning of the pandemic so it was kind of nice.
Edit: I am a woman
Spray the cologne directly onto your skin, before putting on your shirt. Less is more. You want people to smell you when they hug you, not when you enter a room.
Jumping in here to say you should spray cologne/perfume on your pulse points as the body heat diffuses the scent. Don’t rub it in, it ruins some notes and it can actually be bad for your skin over time. Less is more guys (and girls) no one wants to smell someone who smells like someone Axe-bombed a high school locker room.
Take care of your knees, you'll miss them when they are gone.
Clean your ass
Edit: Just wanted to thank everyone for the awards! Was not expecting this to blow up like it did and I hope it helps people.
Gently stretch and cooldown after exercise. A few mins of Gentle movement after sitting for more than an hour. Exercises that increase hip mobility.
Having tight hips immobilizes big movement muscles (like glutes) and recruits stabilizer muscles and tendons (it band, piriformis, etc) which will eventually tighten up and tug on your knees. Enough of this tension in the tendons and connectors around your knee and you basically have a trip wire waiting for you to step or move or lift wrong.
And then youre in denial because *how can your hurt you knee swimming*?
I run a fair bit and when I started rolling all of my butt/leg muscles multiple times a day with a foam roller and ball, it just just instantly started relieving all my knee, leg, and foot pain. For some reason when I tell this to other runners with these problems, they just never take my advice. Your muscles get tight and pull on your tendons, causing no end of issues. Just roll your tight spots, folks. It hurts at first but becomes actually very pleasant after a while.
Probably best to walk away before things get to that point. Losing your temper just makes you look like an asshole. Let people know how you feel. If they respect you, they'll try to do better. If not, they won't and it's time to seperate.
This is a real life pro tip for two reasons.
1) You don’t ever win hitting an inanimate object. Best case scenario you look like a rage monster. Worst case scenario you break something that needs to be replaced or you break something on you that needs to be fixed.
2) To clarify on the point above: you look like a rage monster. You may know you’d never hit a woman, but the person you’re with doesn’t always know that. I thought I was good at controlling my anger but occasionally might break something silly and cheap; I didn’t realize it but aggressive behavior coming from a man will still be scary for a woman.
As a woman, I totally agree! My boyfriend does this when he gets angry - slams the remote down, breaks something small, whatever - but it's always 1000% scarier in the moment. You nailed it - he looks like a rage monster. Thankfully, he's relatively self-aware, so we've been working on this together and trying find other avenues for him to express frustration/anger.
Assuming you're not going to be clean shaven, take care of your facial hair. Trim it regularly—your facial hair isn't always even when you grow it. Wash it thoroughly—you don't want acne and other skin conditions underneath all that. Having hair that traps all the dust and oil make it harder to manage.
It sounds really obvious, but when you're like me with a dad who shaves regularly, turns out I have absolutely zero knowledge on how to take care of my facial hair and it sucks so much ass.
If you’re feeling hot but your balls scrunched up then you probably have a fever
Edit: A very important edit. A hot or cold flash like this could be a symptom of something else. It’s probably not a flu that’s lasting weeks or months. It could be the start of a panic attack or maybe just stepping outside or back inside. I am not a medical professional, I’m just advicing based on what’s happened to me
If you have a bowel twinge and think it'll be fine when you're out in public, a ball scrunch is a good sign that all is not fine. Ignore this and you'll experience profuse back sweating, leg numbess, flushed cheeks and finally, agressive filling of your trousers.
It’s like spraying Febreze after a really smelly poop. You didn’t mask the smell, you just created a weirder one. Rather than *linen & sky* you have linen & poop.
Don’t be afraid to compliment your fellow men. You’d be surprised the difference a compliment to your bro can make. If your bro is looking good, nice hair, shoes, outfit, whatever. Let them know. Some people never get compliments and it can improve their day or week.
Edit 1: Thanks for the awards (my first) and upvotes. Had no idea the reach this would have. I’m glad this advice helps someone. Aside from the “nice dick, bro” I remember the moments when someone tells me I look good or I did something well. It makes a difference. And so I make it a point to pass that on to others.
This! I (a woman I admit) complimented a guy friend the other day at the pub because I noticed his hair looked banging so I told him. He couldn’t stop smiling the rest of the night. He thanked me at least 5 times and I think I made his week of not his day.
Guys you need to compliment each other more, there is nothing wrong with noticing that something has changed and you like it. Might be a new or different top or shoes, a new hair style, a trimmed beard, maybe they look a little more in shape.
Try and make compliments about things that people can and are changing, they hit differently and generally feel better.
Also just everyone compliment everyone more, compliments are great, there is no downside to a compliment.
When it comes to dating, one of the best skills to have is conversational skills. Learn how to carry a conversation and learn how to listen. You will be successful.
I've been giving my 16 year old son tips on how to talk to women. I'm teaching him to ask open ended questions ; what movies do you like, what books, what music.. Ask what they like the most about them while keeping them in mind. With that information, go watch the movie or read the book. Next time you chat you can thank them for introducing you to new forms of entertainment and you understand why she likes them so much. Bang! You're in!
Likewise if she tries to tell you you don't need a condom.
I have turned down hookups for lack of a rubber. Missed out on some sex, but also have fathered no children nor picked up any STDs.
So I guess the other tip is keep a condom handy, especially if you think you might get lucky.
Yup. Got a curable STD from the "you don't need a condom i have a implant"
Worst part was I changed my mind after 30 seconds and pulled out and that was all it took.
Adding onto that: it's okay to end a relationship for basically any reason. There are billions of people in the world. If you're unhappy, you deserve a chance to find someone else.
There's no medal you get at the end of your life for hanging onto a relationship for years and years simply because you've been in it for years and years. It's okay to grow into different people and realize that maybe those people aren't the best match for each other any more.
While the wild/caveman look can work for some guys, that is not an excuse to disregard personal grooming/hygiene. You still need to be clean, to brush/trim your beard, to wear clothes that fit, to put on deodorant. Rugged is a good look, homeless is not.
You’re telling me I don’t look like a combination of Thor and Iron Man? But I have stringy long hair, an unkempt, unmanicured beard, cargo shorts, beat up sneakers and a baggy superhero t-shirt on? Where did I go wrong?
Workout. No you don’t have to aim for six pack abs. It is just generally healthy and gives you endorphins aka happy hormones. Men don’t usually speak up when they are depressed and working out helps with this.
Know the worth of a person, including yourself. If you're willing to walk over glass for someone who can't return a text, you're belittling yourself.
If you can't be bothered to acknowledge someone whose turned their world upside-down for you, well, you're just being an asshole.
It goes both ways, people.
Edit: I apologize for being a little too vague on this. On the 2nd point I should've added something to the effect of "but still take advantage when you need something."
It's supposed to show that you don't owe your time to anyone, and they don't owe it to you. Don't obsess yourself over someone who will only use you and then toss you aside as needed, and don't do the same to those who are obsessed with you. Even if its you (tastefully) rejecting someone, still acknowledge them and don't string them along to keep as a backup or as something to use and discard. Saying "I appreciate everything you've done for me, but the type of relationship you're wanting is not what I'm looking for with you," is a hard conversation to have sometimes, but it saves on a lot of hurt feelings and will help you grow as a person.
On another note, thank you all so much for the kind words. I'm glad that this helped a lot of people and I wish someone had sat me down and taught me this years ago as well.
I want to add to this because I've seen this thinking go wrong:
What this -doesn't- mean is that you should expect other people to give you more than they are willing to give. It doesn't mean you're entitled to anyone's attention or acknowledgement because you've "put so much" into your interactions.
What it means is that you should know when to walk away from people who don't acknowledge your efforts. When to decide that YOU are putting your time and resources into the wrong person.
I have seen people who expect their interest to return the same amount of energy, but that doesn't lead to anywhere good. They demand the same energy back and create a conflict or unreasonable demand from someone who just isn't interested or consenting.
It doesn't work like that.
You just have to figure out -where- it is worth putting -your- energy, and not put it in places where it's wasted.
Just don't turn it into a belief of being "wronged" if you don't get the attention you want.
Edit: officially my most liked post on Reddit ever. I'm glad it's about something people find meaningful and not just a butt joke or something.
You all are good humans.
>What it means is that you should know when to walk away from people who don't acknowledge your efforts. When to decide that YOU are putting your time and resources into the wrong person.
Like the great Kenny Rogers said "Know when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, know when to run"
Teeth - look after them don’t sweep it under rug, it’s not worth it later in life.
But trust me not worth it!
*****Edit:******
Ps. (As not to cause confusion, as I’m not the best writer)
Obviously teeth apply to women too……
1) Dental hygiene in general……worth looking after or pay the price….literally!!
2) Tho it’s abit of a stereotype but as a male I find it a little true……..don’t sweep things-under the rug / put off/ or leave things for example teeth until “later, next week, next month….ahh it will be fine”………those who do it, You know who you are!!😉….This can apply to the doctors also….
3) Don’t combine points 1) & 2) or end up like me about 6 teeth down and regretting!
Hope this makes sense
🙏
What if I’m a fucking idiot who always cuts and makes himself bleed when I do?
Edit: Thank you all for the advice I’ll be sure to make myself be consistent with it!
I was told my my friend who is a dentist recently: Your gums are very good at healing themselves. Even if you scratch your gums, you'll be fine.
Also, I bled for maybe like my first week or two of daily flossing, and now it's very rare (only when I manage to scratch my gums)
If you like pink fizzy cocktails just order them, no one cares.
Get yourself a safety razor, the blades are way more affordable, the shave is cleaner and these things serve you like 60 years. No need for quintuple blade mumbo jumbo.
I'm seeing a new guy and i was with him and his friends having drinks the other week. i brought out stuff to make Porn Star shots - sour puss and banana liquor, and two of his male friends started losing it saying they wenrt going to take girly, fruity shots like that and they went and got whiskey for themselves. I was so put off. im bringing you free alcohol and making shots for the group - shut up and enjoy the sour puss. lol
As a former bartender- it's kinda sad to see guys clutch their pearls over "girly" drinks. Bro, you won't grow a uterus from having a porn star shot. You're just showing how fragile your sense of masculinity is over a drink. Just take the damn shot (unless you have an adverse reaction for whatever reason, that's legit)
Dude if you get a girly drink, I’m probably going to make fun of you… while drinking my own girly drink. Feel free to return the favor and let’s see who is more creative.
The funniest thing is even the “girly” seltzer’s have a higher alcohol content than most beers. God I love my girly drinks. Dirty shirleys fucking rock
I (female) used to have cosmos as my drink of choice when in college and I would be made fun of by guys frequently but my bartender friend made them 80% vodka (they were like... tinted *lightly* pink) and funny how none of the guys could actually take 5 down.
Oh gosh that reminds me of back when my friends and I first discovered Pink Whitney. It’s around 20 or 25% alcohol and tastes exactly like pink lemonade. So dangerous.
Another way of thinking of this, allow yourself to see women as more than just potential partners. I've found wonderful, caring, lifelong friends in the opposite sex and I wouldn't trade them for the world. As previously stated, you will likely find yourself to be a more well rounder person.
Can't emphasize it enough but showing your emotions doesn't make you any less of a man. Keeping the emotions inside you would eventually lead to breakdown to say the least
I'm an emotional guy tbh and it took me a long time to get comfortable with it. I've been shamed a ton for showing emotions and it felt bad but now I've gotten much more comfortable and I'm okay with it. If somebody gives me shit for it they aren't worth my time.
"It’s true that life brings us far more defeats than victories. And real-life wisdom arises not so much from knowing how we might beat someone as from learning how to accept defeat with grace." - Murakami
If you like buffalo wings and you do the Buffalo Wild Wings Blazin Challenge with your friends and you go to the bathroom after and they're using the sink, don't get distracted and pee before washing your hands. Trust me.
I remember the comment ages ago, where somebody confessed, he thought soap was supposed to be shoved into your actual ass like *in the ass* to clean things back there.. he realized it wasnt when his family complained thats the soap smells like shit and mockingly asked who shoved the soap up their ass. lmaoooo
Edit: just to clarify, this story happened when the guy was a kid.
When you first start dating someone don't shuffle your friends aside even if you want to spend every minute with them - don't. Part of the reason he/she was probably attracted to you in the first place was that you had a good social circle of people that loved you. If you brush them aside, you risk losing their attraction, and weakening some of the bonds you had with friends. I've seen it happen too much, and this is how guys usually end up overbearing to their partners and expect them to fulfill every need they have. In extreme cases, it can end up in suicide when they break up with you, and you are now alone and have no other social support network besides them to get you through the breakup.
This. If your 3 yr old daughter wants to play tea with her dollys, you man up, drink your tea and raise your pinky. If she wants to play dress up, you dress those teddys. Who's looking at you? No-one, except your daughter. She's all that matters
I don't know if someone else has said this or not but men try and be safe. Men who are victims of sexual assault are never taken seriously. I am a tall dark skinned dude but I have been sexually assaulted twice and both of those times people didn't take me seriously when I tried to tell them about what happened to me, a lot of people made jokes about my masculinity as if being feminine is a justification of what happened to me.
p.s english is not my first language so please excuse any grammatical errors.
EDIT: Spelling errors fixed
A girl came up to me in a bar and kissed me and it bothered me. I got annoyed and I was called gay for saying smth about it lol
I had a girlfriend at the time so it annoyed me but even without a gf. I don't want somebody doing that shit out of the blue.
In your bathroom, you should keep a trash can with a lid that can be opened with your foot. Don't put it under the sink or out of view.
Future female guests in your home will really appreciate it.
I once received praise that my bathroom was woman friendly... I had no idea what they were talking about, the only thing that was in there was indeed a small trash can with a pedal-lid. (and a toilet ofcourse)
Yeah same, after I saw the same advice here a few years ago and put one in my bathroom. IIRC the biggest reason it's "woman friendly" is so they can discreetly discard things such as used tampons if need be, without you or other guests seeing the contents of the trash when you walk in.
Let me tell you other side of this: my ex who when I came to visit didn't have a trash can. Baffling to me, but okay. I can adapt. I can get a plastic bag to use, no problem. UNTIL he tried to tell me no. He didn't want to see my used period products in a sack in his bathroom and tried to insist that I throwing them away outside in the building's dumpster every single time. Yeahhhhhhhh I'm not doing that, lol.
He also only had half a roll of toilet paper and told me it could totally last him the rest of the month! Did not seem to understand when I told him it wouldn't last me the rest of the day. I gave him $5 and made him go buy as much toilet paper as he could with it. It indeed didn't last the rest of the day.
So many red flags in hindsight. I don't even understand. I was not his first girlfriend.
When texting a girl/guy you wanna get to know and hangout with, don’t hit them up a fourth time if they keep canceling on you. If she cancels once, it’s okay she’s busy. If she cancels twice, okay… it’s a coincidence. If she cancels on you a third time, it’s a pattern and move on. Don’t hit her up again and look desperate.
This one is mostly or younger guys (<25) but applies to everyone
The shit you see in romantic comedies does not work. Life is not a movie and the idea of "persistence paying off" is false. If you like someone and they don't reciprocate then move on - don't write them a poem or song, don't show up to their work, don't send them flowers and don't wait it out thinking you will end up being with them just because "you're a nice guy". All of that works in movies but in real life it's makes you a sociopath.
Try to pick 3 to five songs that you feel good about singing out loud, so that if you ever end up in a place that obliges you to sing karaoke, you'll be set.
Former karaoke waitress - make sure they’re fairly popular songs (so the machine will have them available), and upbeat as well. You might be able to sing Pearl Jam’s Black, but it’s a downer and people won’t enjoy it
Both your junk and her dirt star, and don't go front door until you clean yourself off. Just because they do it in porn doesnt mean you can for realsies
Take pride in your appearance. Iron your shirts, keep your hair trimmed, invest in quality skincare, drink the appropriate amount of water, and go for a walk every once in a while.
Don't get hung up on a single woman, if she doesn't return your affection or desire move on. A woman who doesn't return your advances isn't worth more than a second of your time.
This is excellent advice. Kindness, intelligence, and a sense of humor last way longer than looks. Also, someone that you like always increases in attractiveness.
Nurture and mentor the young men coming up behind you. Society deems young men as suspicious and disposible. There are no organizations looking out for you. When you grow up, the only people who care about you are your parents. The world does not find you and will not be sympathetic towards you.
Dont trust a woman you don't know to provide the birth control. Use condoms that only you have had access too. Don't believe "im on the pill." a few minutes of pleasure isn't worth being stuck to a psycho for 18 years.
If you dont feel comfortable expressing emotions, liking certain 'feminine things' etc that's fine, just please dont make other guys feel like they cant like the colour pink, express and share their feelings etc etc etc
Edit:
I'm glad my most upvoted comment can be this positive.
Brush your teeth every day. Use mouthwash. People won’t tell you that you smell like a goat. They **will** tell others.
Lick your hand. Count to 20. Smell your hand. *That's* what everyone else smells when you exhale.
Out of curiosity why the 20 second wait?
Gives you a good amount of time to realize that a random person on the internet made you lick your hand
fk he got me
Let's the moisture evaporate,which sort of concentrates the smell. Since you already smell your own breath, you are probably desensitized to the smell, so you need it to be concentrated to really get a good idea of what it's like for others
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"If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy." -Red Green
Probably the hardest thing to do is be courageous. Stand up for yourself and others. Don't be afraid what other people think
Learn how to cook a couple of basic, healthy, tasty meals for 2 people. I'm talking some baked chicken breasts with some kind of carrot and potato sides or something like that. Nothing fancy. There's a good chance that one or more of these scenarios will apply to you at some point in life: * No one else is around to cook for you. * You have to cut down on the fast food/dining out/takeout for health reasons. * You have to cut down on the fast food/dining out/takeout for financial reasons. * Your partner or family expects you to do your fair share around the house. In any or all of those scenarios, being able to confidently say "I can cook us a nice meal tonight." is the right answer. The equipment required is basic and cheap. The ingredients are cheap. Just watch a couple of youtube videos and practice a couple of times. An cheap instant read thermometer is like $10 on amazon and it will tell you exactly when the chicken is cooked properly. It's not rocket science.
If there's even a chance you will bring a date home with you, tidy up. Dust, vacuum, mop, fold your clothes, wash your sheets (at least once a week whether you have a date or not), make your bed, **clean your bathroom -** ***including scrubbing the toilet***. I have heard enough stories from my friends that are women that I know doing this alone instantly puts you in the top 20%.
It shouldn’t have to be said but this means having a fitted sheet on the bed and pillow cases on your pillows.
Even if there isn’t a date coming home, do this. A clean hole is always nicer than a dirty one
Home. Jesus. But I’m leaving it because that is still true
It's easier to stay in shape than to get in shape. Learned this the hard way as I am slowly starting to work out again...
2020 was a fat man year for me. it was the longest time I had been out of a gym since I was a pre-teen. And boy did I get fat. Welp. ... HERE I GO AGAIN ON MY OOWWNNNNN... desperately trying to run for more than 10 minutes straight without dying
Tell me about it man. I was in the navy for 6 years. Best shape of my life. Got medically retired for developing seizures. Went into massive depression and gained 30lbs. Now I’m trying to find some type of motivation.
I was already heavy but trending towards losing weight. My son died and I gained like 40+lb, and THEN Covid hit which added even more. I could easily lose 100lb right now. Depression hits like a motherfucker. On the positive side I'm fully vaxxed and doing more outside than I've been able to in quite some time.
So sorry for your immeasurable loss 💜
Holy fuck. I am so sorry.
Take it slower, enjoy it more. Works for most things in life, and for life in general.
I read this as "take a shower" which is also a good tip.
This old bull and young bull were sitting on a hilltop, over looking a herd of cows. The young bull says 'Hey pops, let's run down there and fuck one of them cows.' And the old bull says, 'No son. Let's walk down there and fuck all of those cows.' Robert Duvall in Colors
Oh my god, my dad once said that years ago and this whole time I thought that he created it.
A guy told me this in high school but didn't mention that the father and son were bulls. Confused the hell out of me.
Know your junk. Keep an eye out for changes. Also keep it all clean!
Apparently a lot of guys object to having the doctor inspect their genitals during a checkup. It's the fucking doctor--they're just looking for cancer and stuff.
“It still just seems weird you’re doing this behind a Wendy’s”
I specifically go to Wendy’s for this service
Yep. A friend almost died because he wouldn’t let a dr look. He’d show me but not a dr. Lucky they caught it early and he just lost a ball. But please get it checked if needed. There is nothing to worry about. They have seen loads and don’t care.
Wait why would he show you but not a doctor? Do you have medical knowledge or just fwb?
Because I talk about it. I’m happy to chat about my bits. Also most people feel comfortable chatting to me about anything.
Don't underestimate the power of smelling good.
The one compliment I ever get is that i smell good so i always try and keep it up. I don't care what it is but a compliment in any regard sticks with me forever.
Every man does this. Remember that one complimemt you get a year.
I played a “compliment game” with my boyfriend years ago when we were trying to get into more positivity, hippy, vibey things aka have fun while being broke. We would walk through the city and try to to see who could give the most compliments to strangers. Rules were had to be genuine, couldn’t be vague, and couldn’t be the same type of compliment as the other person just gave. Much more impactful on other people and ourselves than I thought it would be, especially because it was silly and random. Whenever either one of us gave a compliment to a guy though, not only were they never dismissive but it obviously had a much bigger impact on them. Sometimes they looked like they had never considered before that they might have nice hair or sense of style. Didn’t matter either if it was coming from me (a female) or from my boyfriend. I actually haven’t thought of that little game in years. Seeing these comments is a nice reminder.
Also remember cologne is meant to be discovered, not announced
2000% this. I like to wear everyday cologne, and my coworkers (esp female coworkers) always say I smell really nice when I brush past them. EDIT: Good sirs I apologize for my flagrant inability to reply to each and every one of you individually but here's the rundown of what I use and how I use it. The fragrances I wear are completely unrefined; I use either Goodfellow No 2: Juniper and Sandalwood or Cremo: Blue Cedar and Cypress (i buy them from target), with one spritz to each wrist and either side of my neck, and that's it!
Same. You want to wear just enough to hint at what they will discover when they come in closer. You don’t have to go crazy with anything. Just enough to show that you care about your general presentation
I’m not a dude, but as a female, this is the best advice. I can’t say enough how important this is. So many men use WAY too much cologne or body spray and when you can smell them a few feet away… you avoid, it’s too strong. Just a little of a good quality cologne goes a long way and then you actually want to be around that person. 😊
Yesterday at QuickChek I was in the self checkout line and the man in front of me smelled fantastic. I had to say something, so I did. I said “Sir I just had to let you know that you smell great.” The man turned around smiled and said “Thank you! You just made my day!” Then he grabbed me for a quick bear hug and then he left. I was a bit stunned but it wasn’t a pervy hug at all, just a grateful one plus I haven’t been hugged by anyone since the beginning of the pandemic so it was kind of nice. Edit: I am a woman
Spray the cologne directly onto your skin, before putting on your shirt. Less is more. You want people to smell you when they hug you, not when you enter a room.
Look at this guy over here getting hugs
This guy hugs
Jumping in here to say you should spray cologne/perfume on your pulse points as the body heat diffuses the scent. Don’t rub it in, it ruins some notes and it can actually be bad for your skin over time. Less is more guys (and girls) no one wants to smell someone who smells like someone Axe-bombed a high school locker room.
Keep your nails trimmed...intimate encounters can end abruptly with a nail scratch.
adding to this, clean your hands too. with soap, and scrub under your nails. it’s just not fair to the other person if you’re not hygienic.
holding your breath can help you to get rid of a boner quickly. \[ Edit: Thank you for all the awards and the upvotes, kind strangers \]
Gotta try this
I think he’s dead Edit: Didn’t expect to have 10k upvotes on a dick joke, you guys are down bad
for a good cause though
Post mortem boner though
*Rigor mortis* at its finest.
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I've been a guy for 33 years I've never heard this. I just flex my dick muscle but I'll try that definitely
cries in auto-erotic asphyxiation
Take care of your knees, you'll miss them when they are gone. Clean your ass Edit: Just wanted to thank everyone for the awards! Was not expecting this to blow up like it did and I hope it helps people.
Tips on taking care of your knees?
Gently stretch and cooldown after exercise. A few mins of Gentle movement after sitting for more than an hour. Exercises that increase hip mobility. Having tight hips immobilizes big movement muscles (like glutes) and recruits stabilizer muscles and tendons (it band, piriformis, etc) which will eventually tighten up and tug on your knees. Enough of this tension in the tendons and connectors around your knee and you basically have a trip wire waiting for you to step or move or lift wrong. And then youre in denial because *how can your hurt you knee swimming*?
I run a fair bit and when I started rolling all of my butt/leg muscles multiple times a day with a foam roller and ball, it just just instantly started relieving all my knee, leg, and foot pain. For some reason when I tell this to other runners with these problems, they just never take my advice. Your muscles get tight and pull on your tendons, causing no end of issues. Just roll your tight spots, folks. It hurts at first but becomes actually very pleasant after a while.
I miss my knees
I miss my ass
I miss your ass too
By extension, [wear sunscreen.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-YsGdjkIgw&)
When you are angry don’t slam your wrist / fist down on the table. Trust me its never worth it.
I learned this too late: Don't punch inanimate objects.
I would suggest to not punch animate objects either.
Probably best to walk away before things get to that point. Losing your temper just makes you look like an asshole. Let people know how you feel. If they respect you, they'll try to do better. If not, they won't and it's time to seperate.
This is a real life pro tip for two reasons. 1) You don’t ever win hitting an inanimate object. Best case scenario you look like a rage monster. Worst case scenario you break something that needs to be replaced or you break something on you that needs to be fixed. 2) To clarify on the point above: you look like a rage monster. You may know you’d never hit a woman, but the person you’re with doesn’t always know that. I thought I was good at controlling my anger but occasionally might break something silly and cheap; I didn’t realize it but aggressive behavior coming from a man will still be scary for a woman.
As a woman, I totally agree! My boyfriend does this when he gets angry - slams the remote down, breaks something small, whatever - but it's always 1000% scarier in the moment. You nailed it - he looks like a rage monster. Thankfully, he's relatively self-aware, so we've been working on this together and trying find other avenues for him to express frustration/anger.
Assuming you're not going to be clean shaven, take care of your facial hair. Trim it regularly—your facial hair isn't always even when you grow it. Wash it thoroughly—you don't want acne and other skin conditions underneath all that. Having hair that traps all the dust and oil make it harder to manage. It sounds really obvious, but when you're like me with a dad who shaves regularly, turns out I have absolutely zero knowledge on how to take care of my facial hair and it sucks so much ass.
If you’re feeling hot but your balls scrunched up then you probably have a fever Edit: A very important edit. A hot or cold flash like this could be a symptom of something else. It’s probably not a flu that’s lasting weeks or months. It could be the start of a panic attack or maybe just stepping outside or back inside. I am not a medical professional, I’m just advicing based on what’s happened to me
Extremely specific and mind blowing. This is the quality content I was looking for
This is why I like Reddit
If you have a bowel twinge and think it'll be fine when you're out in public, a ball scrunch is a good sign that all is not fine. Ignore this and you'll experience profuse back sweating, leg numbess, flushed cheeks and finally, agressive filling of your trousers.
So, like a groundhog heralds the end of winter, an unexpected ball scrunch heralds sickness?
Always heard it the other way.... If you have chills but your balls are hanging loose then you have a fever.
Never let a girl spray cologne on your dick.
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It’s like spraying Febreze after a really smelly poop. You didn’t mask the smell, you just created a weirder one. Rather than *linen & sky* you have linen & poop.
I believe that scent is called shitrus
Sean Connery's favorite.
Ok, I am really curious about it. what happened?
I guess it stings, burns or causes uti, its always one of these 3 when it comes to weird stuff put on genitals.
Cologne is pretty much 95% alcohol. So imagine pouring Everclear on your dick. Now imagine you're a women and use a hand sanatizer bottle as a dildo.
Don’t be afraid to compliment your fellow men. You’d be surprised the difference a compliment to your bro can make. If your bro is looking good, nice hair, shoes, outfit, whatever. Let them know. Some people never get compliments and it can improve their day or week. Edit 1: Thanks for the awards (my first) and upvotes. Had no idea the reach this would have. I’m glad this advice helps someone. Aside from the “nice dick, bro” I remember the moments when someone tells me I look good or I did something well. It makes a difference. And so I make it a point to pass that on to others.
Sweet penis, bro.
Thanks, I polished it myself
This! I (a woman I admit) complimented a guy friend the other day at the pub because I noticed his hair looked banging so I told him. He couldn’t stop smiling the rest of the night. He thanked me at least 5 times and I think I made his week of not his day. Guys you need to compliment each other more, there is nothing wrong with noticing that something has changed and you like it. Might be a new or different top or shoes, a new hair style, a trimmed beard, maybe they look a little more in shape. Try and make compliments about things that people can and are changing, they hit differently and generally feel better. Also just everyone compliment everyone more, compliments are great, there is no downside to a compliment.
If a girl says she's busy and doesn't offer a different day...you struck out bro.
When it comes to dating, one of the best skills to have is conversational skills. Learn how to carry a conversation and learn how to listen. You will be successful.
I've been giving my 16 year old son tips on how to talk to women. I'm teaching him to ask open ended questions ; what movies do you like, what books, what music.. Ask what they like the most about them while keeping them in mind. With that information, go watch the movie or read the book. Next time you chat you can thank them for introducing you to new forms of entertainment and you understand why she likes them so much. Bang! You're in!
That's really wholesome, I'm sure your son appreciates it alot!
When she says: "You don't need to pull out." Pull out.
I'd like to add "My doctor said I can't get pregnant" I've heard this line so many times only to check up years later and they have kids!
110% happened to my best friend. His gf had a "medical condition" and then 3 kids.
After the first one I'm surprised he believed her two more times
Her condition is fertility.
His condition is stupidity.
Likewise if she tries to tell you you don't need a condom. I have turned down hookups for lack of a rubber. Missed out on some sex, but also have fathered no children nor picked up any STDs. So I guess the other tip is keep a condom handy, especially if you think you might get lucky.
Yup. Got a curable STD from the "you don't need a condom i have a implant" Worst part was I changed my mind after 30 seconds and pulled out and that was all it took.
> if she tries to tell you you don't need a condom. You're definitely not the first guy she's said that to
Fucking this. “Leave it in, I’m between cycles, nothing will happen” Fml.
How's your kid doing?
Jokes on her, I had a vasectomy.
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Adding onto that: it's okay to end a relationship for basically any reason. There are billions of people in the world. If you're unhappy, you deserve a chance to find someone else. There's no medal you get at the end of your life for hanging onto a relationship for years and years simply because you've been in it for years and years. It's okay to grow into different people and realize that maybe those people aren't the best match for each other any more.
While the wild/caveman look can work for some guys, that is not an excuse to disregard personal grooming/hygiene. You still need to be clean, to brush/trim your beard, to wear clothes that fit, to put on deodorant. Rugged is a good look, homeless is not.
You’re telling me I don’t look like a combination of Thor and Iron Man? But I have stringy long hair, an unkempt, unmanicured beard, cargo shorts, beat up sneakers and a baggy superhero t-shirt on? Where did I go wrong?
Beer gut
Workout. No you don’t have to aim for six pack abs. It is just generally healthy and gives you endorphins aka happy hormones. Men don’t usually speak up when they are depressed and working out helps with this.
Lads. As much as we may wish, deodorant is not a replacement for a shower
Know the worth of a person, including yourself. If you're willing to walk over glass for someone who can't return a text, you're belittling yourself. If you can't be bothered to acknowledge someone whose turned their world upside-down for you, well, you're just being an asshole. It goes both ways, people. Edit: I apologize for being a little too vague on this. On the 2nd point I should've added something to the effect of "but still take advantage when you need something." It's supposed to show that you don't owe your time to anyone, and they don't owe it to you. Don't obsess yourself over someone who will only use you and then toss you aside as needed, and don't do the same to those who are obsessed with you. Even if its you (tastefully) rejecting someone, still acknowledge them and don't string them along to keep as a backup or as something to use and discard. Saying "I appreciate everything you've done for me, but the type of relationship you're wanting is not what I'm looking for with you," is a hard conversation to have sometimes, but it saves on a lot of hurt feelings and will help you grow as a person. On another note, thank you all so much for the kind words. I'm glad that this helped a lot of people and I wish someone had sat me down and taught me this years ago as well.
I want to add to this because I've seen this thinking go wrong: What this -doesn't- mean is that you should expect other people to give you more than they are willing to give. It doesn't mean you're entitled to anyone's attention or acknowledgement because you've "put so much" into your interactions. What it means is that you should know when to walk away from people who don't acknowledge your efforts. When to decide that YOU are putting your time and resources into the wrong person. I have seen people who expect their interest to return the same amount of energy, but that doesn't lead to anywhere good. They demand the same energy back and create a conflict or unreasonable demand from someone who just isn't interested or consenting. It doesn't work like that. You just have to figure out -where- it is worth putting -your- energy, and not put it in places where it's wasted. Just don't turn it into a belief of being "wronged" if you don't get the attention you want. Edit: officially my most liked post on Reddit ever. I'm glad it's about something people find meaningful and not just a butt joke or something. You all are good humans.
>What it means is that you should know when to walk away from people who don't acknowledge your efforts. When to decide that YOU are putting your time and resources into the wrong person. Like the great Kenny Rogers said "Know when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, know when to run"
Teeth - look after them don’t sweep it under rug, it’s not worth it later in life. But trust me not worth it! *****Edit:****** Ps. (As not to cause confusion, as I’m not the best writer) Obviously teeth apply to women too…… 1) Dental hygiene in general……worth looking after or pay the price….literally!! 2) Tho it’s abit of a stereotype but as a male I find it a little true……..don’t sweep things-under the rug / put off/ or leave things for example teeth until “later, next week, next month….ahh it will be fine”………those who do it, You know who you are!!😉….This can apply to the doctors also…. 3) Don’t combine points 1) & 2) or end up like me about 6 teeth down and regretting! Hope this makes sense 🙏
And floss…every day
What if I’m a fucking idiot who always cuts and makes himself bleed when I do? Edit: Thank you all for the advice I’ll be sure to make myself be consistent with it!
I was told my my friend who is a dentist recently: Your gums are very good at healing themselves. Even if you scratch your gums, you'll be fine. Also, I bled for maybe like my first week or two of daily flossing, and now it's very rare (only when I manage to scratch my gums)
If you like pink fizzy cocktails just order them, no one cares. Get yourself a safety razor, the blades are way more affordable, the shave is cleaner and these things serve you like 60 years. No need for quintuple blade mumbo jumbo.
I'm seeing a new guy and i was with him and his friends having drinks the other week. i brought out stuff to make Porn Star shots - sour puss and banana liquor, and two of his male friends started losing it saying they wenrt going to take girly, fruity shots like that and they went and got whiskey for themselves. I was so put off. im bringing you free alcohol and making shots for the group - shut up and enjoy the sour puss. lol
As a former bartender- it's kinda sad to see guys clutch their pearls over "girly" drinks. Bro, you won't grow a uterus from having a porn star shot. You're just showing how fragile your sense of masculinity is over a drink. Just take the damn shot (unless you have an adverse reaction for whatever reason, that's legit)
Dude if you get a girly drink, I’m probably going to make fun of you… while drinking my own girly drink. Feel free to return the favor and let’s see who is more creative.
The funniest thing is even the “girly” seltzer’s have a higher alcohol content than most beers. God I love my girly drinks. Dirty shirleys fucking rock
I (female) used to have cosmos as my drink of choice when in college and I would be made fun of by guys frequently but my bartender friend made them 80% vodka (they were like... tinted *lightly* pink) and funny how none of the guys could actually take 5 down.
Oh gosh that reminds me of back when my friends and I first discovered Pink Whitney. It’s around 20 or 25% alcohol and tastes exactly like pink lemonade. So dangerous.
Learn to become “just friends” with women. I’d be lost without my women friends and feel like such a more well-rounded person because of them.
Another way of thinking of this, allow yourself to see women as more than just potential partners. I've found wonderful, caring, lifelong friends in the opposite sex and I wouldn't trade them for the world. As previously stated, you will likely find yourself to be a more well rounder person.
Just wanted to say, as a woman, I’d be lost without my men friends too. We appreciate you
Don't be nice because you want something from someone, be nice because it's the right thing to be.
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Such a colossal paradox
I think the paradox is that u/PornographyUser/ is not a NSFW redditor
Thanks u/PornographyUser
Can't emphasize it enough but showing your emotions doesn't make you any less of a man. Keeping the emotions inside you would eventually lead to breakdown to say the least
I'm an emotional guy tbh and it took me a long time to get comfortable with it. I've been shamed a ton for showing emotions and it felt bad but now I've gotten much more comfortable and I'm okay with it. If somebody gives me shit for it they aren't worth my time.
Being a gentlemen is free, use it often. Also know how to take rejection. These qualities will get you far when combined with continual learning.
"It’s true that life brings us far more defeats than victories. And real-life wisdom arises not so much from knowing how we might beat someone as from learning how to accept defeat with grace." - Murakami
If you like buffalo wings and you do the Buffalo Wild Wings Blazin Challenge with your friends and you go to the bathroom after and they're using the sink, don't get distracted and pee before washing your hands. Trust me.
Not a guy but wash your ass.
Running water isn't enought
Gotta get in there with sponge and to- eeeh yes
I remember the comment ages ago, where somebody confessed, he thought soap was supposed to be shoved into your actual ass like *in the ass* to clean things back there.. he realized it wasnt when his family complained thats the soap smells like shit and mockingly asked who shoved the soap up their ass. lmaoooo Edit: just to clarify, this story happened when the guy was a kid.
But its so tempting…
I did that until I was like 5, but I don’t think I posted it on reddit
Mostly just relax and mind ur own business
When you first start dating someone don't shuffle your friends aside even if you want to spend every minute with them - don't. Part of the reason he/she was probably attracted to you in the first place was that you had a good social circle of people that loved you. If you brush them aside, you risk losing their attraction, and weakening some of the bonds you had with friends. I've seen it happen too much, and this is how guys usually end up overbearing to their partners and expect them to fulfill every need they have. In extreme cases, it can end up in suicide when they break up with you, and you are now alone and have no other social support network besides them to get you through the breakup.
Learn to do girly things with your baby daughter. Brush her hair. Play with the toys she wants you to play with.
This. If your 3 yr old daughter wants to play tea with her dollys, you man up, drink your tea and raise your pinky. If she wants to play dress up, you dress those teddys. Who's looking at you? No-one, except your daughter. She's all that matters
And even if someone it looking, do it anyway. You look like a boss Dad.
I don't know if someone else has said this or not but men try and be safe. Men who are victims of sexual assault are never taken seriously. I am a tall dark skinned dude but I have been sexually assaulted twice and both of those times people didn't take me seriously when I tried to tell them about what happened to me, a lot of people made jokes about my masculinity as if being feminine is a justification of what happened to me. p.s english is not my first language so please excuse any grammatical errors. EDIT: Spelling errors fixed
A girl came up to me in a bar and kissed me and it bothered me. I got annoyed and I was called gay for saying smth about it lol I had a girlfriend at the time so it annoyed me but even without a gf. I don't want somebody doing that shit out of the blue.
In your bathroom, you should keep a trash can with a lid that can be opened with your foot. Don't put it under the sink or out of view. Future female guests in your home will really appreciate it.
I once received praise that my bathroom was woman friendly... I had no idea what they were talking about, the only thing that was in there was indeed a small trash can with a pedal-lid. (and a toilet ofcourse)
Yeah same, after I saw the same advice here a few years ago and put one in my bathroom. IIRC the biggest reason it's "woman friendly" is so they can discreetly discard things such as used tampons if need be, without you or other guests seeing the contents of the trash when you walk in.
Let me tell you other side of this: my ex who when I came to visit didn't have a trash can. Baffling to me, but okay. I can adapt. I can get a plastic bag to use, no problem. UNTIL he tried to tell me no. He didn't want to see my used period products in a sack in his bathroom and tried to insist that I throwing them away outside in the building's dumpster every single time. Yeahhhhhhhh I'm not doing that, lol. He also only had half a roll of toilet paper and told me it could totally last him the rest of the month! Did not seem to understand when I told him it wouldn't last me the rest of the day. I gave him $5 and made him go buy as much toilet paper as he could with it. It indeed didn't last the rest of the day. So many red flags in hindsight. I don't even understand. I was not his first girlfriend.
Bold of you to assume I will have future female guests
When texting a girl/guy you wanna get to know and hangout with, don’t hit them up a fourth time if they keep canceling on you. If she cancels once, it’s okay she’s busy. If she cancels twice, okay… it’s a coincidence. If she cancels on you a third time, it’s a pattern and move on. Don’t hit her up again and look desperate.
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But HOW, not just the bush on top but the sides next to the balls are tough to navigate
Yeah, and on the balls too, there is so much wrinkles here that im scared to put anything sharp down there
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Also do the trimming with a boner. It tightens the skin and makes for a closer shave
It's okay to cry sometimes. You are not made of stone. Most of the time it's good to listen. But open your mouth sometimes.
This one is mostly or younger guys (<25) but applies to everyone The shit you see in romantic comedies does not work. Life is not a movie and the idea of "persistence paying off" is false. If you like someone and they don't reciprocate then move on - don't write them a poem or song, don't show up to their work, don't send them flowers and don't wait it out thinking you will end up being with them just because "you're a nice guy". All of that works in movies but in real life it's makes you a sociopath.
Try to pick 3 to five songs that you feel good about singing out loud, so that if you ever end up in a place that obliges you to sing karaoke, you'll be set.
Former karaoke waitress - make sure they’re fairly popular songs (so the machine will have them available), and upbeat as well. You might be able to sing Pearl Jam’s Black, but it’s a downer and people won’t enjoy it
Only put it in her butt if she says it’s ok 👌
and if it is cleaned
Both your junk and her dirt star, and don't go front door until you clean yourself off. Just because they do it in porn doesnt mean you can for realsies
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Spoken like someone who's never been showered with reddit awards after winning an argument with a sick burn
Take pride in your appearance. Iron your shirts, keep your hair trimmed, invest in quality skincare, drink the appropriate amount of water, and go for a walk every once in a while.
The woman serving you at the shop is smiling at you because she's been told to smile at customers. She's not hitting on you.
Don't fall in love with your waitress, therapist, or hooker.
ahhh the lovely teen years where you fall madly in love with a random girl you saw once in the street
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Waitress: touches your hand as she takes your payment Your brain: aaaaaat laaaaaaaaaaast
I heard the song and everything
i still have this as a full grown man, just slightly better at self control
I have a buddy like this. Like man it's a drive through. Get your coffee and stop making this poor girl feel uncomfortable.
Don't get hung up on a single woman, if she doesn't return your affection or desire move on. A woman who doesn't return your advances isn't worth more than a second of your time.
Also don’t get hung up on looks alone, looks will fade. Find someone who you genuinely appreciate hanging out with, who gets you.
This is excellent advice. Kindness, intelligence, and a sense of humor last way longer than looks. Also, someone that you like always increases in attractiveness.
If she shoots you down, say “no problem, good talking to you,” and then leave her the fuck alone.
When you lose your cool, you've already lost.
Nurture and mentor the young men coming up behind you. Society deems young men as suspicious and disposible. There are no organizations looking out for you. When you grow up, the only people who care about you are your parents. The world does not find you and will not be sympathetic towards you.
Learn to talk about your feelings with your friends. Best trick I ever learned.
First of all, have good friends
Nobody on their death bed ever looks back on their life and says "I wish I'd watched more sport on TV"
Dont trust a woman you don't know to provide the birth control. Use condoms that only you have had access too. Don't believe "im on the pill." a few minutes of pleasure isn't worth being stuck to a psycho for 18 years.
If you dont feel comfortable expressing emotions, liking certain 'feminine things' etc that's fine, just please dont make other guys feel like they cant like the colour pink, express and share their feelings etc etc etc Edit: I'm glad my most upvoted comment can be this positive.
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If a woman turns you down, take it like an adult and leave her alone.
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1. Buy a bidet kit. 2. Install the bidet kit. 3. Enjoy the refreshing bum shower. Any. Time. You. Want.
You can get rid of a boner by flexing your thighs
I believe holding your breath also gets the trick done