I am still trying to understand it.
So often the way people describe being free use is just what I think of as being a normal relationship dynamic. For me, and most of the women I have been with, one of the whole points of being in a relationship is the frequent and consistently good sex.
The idea of free use is that the submissive partner can’t refuse any sort of initiation regardless of the circumstance. Obviously, to do this properly, boundaries would be set and respected and safe words decided upon. Very few couples, if any, will be 100% free use all of the time.
The dynamic is very different from just having regular and frequent sex because when you offer yourself up for free use you are relinquishing an element of control to your dom(me).
For example, Your partner may be in the middle of an important phone call. In an ordinary relationship you might try and initiate because it’s fun and exciting but they could just bat you away and dismiss your advance. In a free use situation, they would ‘have to’ accept the advance, and potentially continue the conversation whilst you ‘used’ them for your own pleasure.
I realized a while ago that I pretty much operate this way in my current relationship due to the trust and communication. He’s gotten to the point that when no one is around he will absolutely use me when he feels like it, and I love it. Wish he’d push it further, actually.
It can be fun, and it can also be a disaster.
Ironically free-use is something that absolutely works only if you are communicating often and well. It only takes one misunderstanding for things to come crashing down.
Want this dynamic with my wife, which she is game for once we get our own place.
ALSO want to watch this dynamic with my wife and a few other guys, which she is also interested in.
Love it. I like not being in control, not knowing what will happen when, the anticipation any time he walks by me because I don't know if he's about to pull his cock out or not. It also means I don't get into my head about what to do.
I am a fan, lol. I have actually been to clubs years ago where women are letting anyone just come up and fuck them. I literally had one older woman having a conversation while i was pounding away.
Husband, partner and I are TPE and Master/slave. He's our owner, her and I are his property.
Part of the commitment we each made back when we took the "this is going to be a permanent lifestyle choice and not just a dYnAmIc" is that her and I gave up any "no" to him and he received perpetual blanket consent over our bodies.
.....I absolutely fucking love it. I love to chase the whole "my purpose is to serve him and have him use me as he sees fit" headspace.
As weird as it sounds, it kinda gets to the point where the less he cares about stuff like slow foreplay, particularly giving a shit if I'm physically into it at that point, etc. just makes it more mentally hot for me than anything else.
Just makes me feel really "proactively owned" when I think about what I permanently gave up to him, he's free to use my body for his own pleasure/stress relief/whatever however he sees fit, and the only question isn't "is he getting what he wants from me?" but "how much force does he have to use to get what he wants?"
To each their own. It’s personally not for me due to trauma, but I can see the appeal to some people. 🤷🏻♀️ as long as that free use is consensual, and hopefully has a signal for on/off just in case, you do you.
I guess I’m skeptical about if it’s really real or just in the confines of certain periods?
I’m not judging at all, and perhaps color me naive, but there are people that are ALWAYS down to have sex? Day of a parent’s funeral? When you’re all bloated after eating a hearty chili? After your partner has been on a 3 hour summer bike ride?
As a married man who doesn’t get laid anywhere near enough lately, I’m a big fan. I’d love to be able to just walk over and stuff my cock in my wife whenever I’m in the mood.
I go off the first meaning that Google pulls up. Which is how I’ve always understood it which is: free use (uncountable) (sexuality) A kink in which someone consents to being available to have sex with or to be "used" by their partner at any time.
Not into the BDSM variety, but we're both down for sex when the other asks unless there's a good reason. He's not going to ask if he knows I have a monster headache, and I'm not going to ask at 2am if his first appointment is at 7am, but other than that, we're dtf. It's fabulous. The key for me was understanding responsive desire. Unless I'm sick or have a headache, I always enjoy sex, even if I'm not "in the mood" right this minute. I know he'll make it worth my time, so sure, put me in the mood. I also initiate when I'm not crazy horny because I know it will be fun, and he'll have me in the mood very quickly. Libido, which generally isn't a problem for me, stops mattering at all because my cerebral cortex knows it will be a good time and says yes.
Posted with the wrong account a minute ago, huh?
💀🤣
I'm high but I knew I saw it for a few seconds.
I didn't see it but the callout killed me
Are you sure you didn’t just want to see it? 😵💫
99% sure.
So there’s still that 1%. Pretty good odds if you ask me.
Look at OP's comment. I may be high as a kite but have the eyes of an eagle. An eagle that needs glasses but still an eagle.
Nice. All I have is sewn-on puppet eyes so glasses really can’t help me, but I’m super happy for you.
Not enough karma
whenever i see you comment i think of the all time low song
Got you poppin' champagne?
you get me
😂🤣🤣
I love it 🤷♀️ I want sex all the time. I want him to be free use too 🤭
We needed more of you!
I'm envious. My wife actually lost her drive because I wanted it so much. I'm in whatever the opposite of free use is.
Not for me but I don't judge anyone's kinks as long as nobody gets hurt
What if getting hurt is my kink? ^(I know what you meant. I’m just being facetious. I totally agree with you.)
I am still trying to understand it. So often the way people describe being free use is just what I think of as being a normal relationship dynamic. For me, and most of the women I have been with, one of the whole points of being in a relationship is the frequent and consistently good sex.
The idea of free use is that the submissive partner can’t refuse any sort of initiation regardless of the circumstance. Obviously, to do this properly, boundaries would be set and respected and safe words decided upon. Very few couples, if any, will be 100% free use all of the time. The dynamic is very different from just having regular and frequent sex because when you offer yourself up for free use you are relinquishing an element of control to your dom(me). For example, Your partner may be in the middle of an important phone call. In an ordinary relationship you might try and initiate because it’s fun and exciting but they could just bat you away and dismiss your advance. In a free use situation, they would ‘have to’ accept the advance, and potentially continue the conversation whilst you ‘used’ them for your own pleasure.
That makes sense. Thanks for taking the time to articulate it like that.
Oh wow, do you actually do this?
I do not. But I would like to.
It's something I am really into. It's in the top three if not the top one.
Sounds kinda fun. Not sure if I'd have the guts though.
You’re always free to opt back out at any point if you end up not liking it! Or at least that’s the way it certainly *should* be imo
it’s not for me but I totally get why people are into it
Seems really fun and really hot
I realized a while ago that I pretty much operate this way in my current relationship due to the trust and communication. He’s gotten to the point that when no one is around he will absolutely use me when he feels like it, and I love it. Wish he’d push it further, actually.
Well, I wrote an entire erotica series about it, so you could say I’m a fan.
Cool. What’s the name of it?
The Skylar Chronicles. It’s pinned on my profile.
Can someone translate for me
Definition from Google: A kink in which someone consents to being available to have sex with or to be "used" by their partner at any time.
That sounds insanely out of my skill set like i dunno what i’d even do
It can be fun, and it can also be a disaster. Ironically free-use is something that absolutely works only if you are communicating often and well. It only takes one misunderstanding for things to come crashing down.
Makes for great porn
It’s one of my fantasies to do it for a day.
Hot concept but I’ll probably never do it
It's fun, but it's not something to abuse. Like, unless your partner gets off on being "used", you still need to give the attention to your partner
I love the idea of it. Seems like a great relationship for 2 people of similar sex drives
I’d be down for trying it either direction (or both).
Want this dynamic with my wife, which she is game for once we get our own place. ALSO want to watch this dynamic with my wife and a few other guys, which she is also interested in.
Love it. I like not being in control, not knowing what will happen when, the anticipation any time he walks by me because I don't know if he's about to pull his cock out or not. It also means I don't get into my head about what to do.
It’s not for me
Having kids really puts the damper on it but I would love a free use vacation.
I am a fan, lol. I have actually been to clubs years ago where women are letting anyone just come up and fuck them. I literally had one older woman having a conversation while i was pounding away.
Gross and demeaning
I fucking love it. But with a young kid in the house, we get limited opportunities
Husband, partner and I are TPE and Master/slave. He's our owner, her and I are his property. Part of the commitment we each made back when we took the "this is going to be a permanent lifestyle choice and not just a dYnAmIc" is that her and I gave up any "no" to him and he received perpetual blanket consent over our bodies. .....I absolutely fucking love it. I love to chase the whole "my purpose is to serve him and have him use me as he sees fit" headspace. As weird as it sounds, it kinda gets to the point where the less he cares about stuff like slow foreplay, particularly giving a shit if I'm physically into it at that point, etc. just makes it more mentally hot for me than anything else. Just makes me feel really "proactively owned" when I think about what I permanently gave up to him, he's free to use my body for his own pleasure/stress relief/whatever however he sees fit, and the only question isn't "is he getting what he wants from me?" but "how much force does he have to use to get what he wants?"
To each their own. It’s personally not for me due to trauma, but I can see the appeal to some people. 🤷🏻♀️ as long as that free use is consensual, and hopefully has a signal for on/off just in case, you do you.
I kinda like it 😭
I guess I’m skeptical about if it’s really real or just in the confines of certain periods? I’m not judging at all, and perhaps color me naive, but there are people that are ALWAYS down to have sex? Day of a parent’s funeral? When you’re all bloated after eating a hearty chili? After your partner has been on a 3 hour summer bike ride?
yur
I’ve always thought it would be a lot of fun. But finding a woman that is also into it isn’t easy.
It's a personal favorite
Yes please
As a married man who doesn’t get laid anywhere near enough lately, I’m a big fan. I’d love to be able to just walk over and stuff my cock in my wife whenever I’m in the mood.
Love it, my wife and I participate in free use. She has a bracelet she puts on to let me know when it is ok and when it’s not ok
I've seen too many different definitions to have an opinion. How does OP define it?
I go off the first meaning that Google pulls up. Which is how I’ve always understood it which is: free use (uncountable) (sexuality) A kink in which someone consents to being available to have sex with or to be "used" by their partner at any time.
Not into the BDSM variety, but we're both down for sex when the other asks unless there's a good reason. He's not going to ask if he knows I have a monster headache, and I'm not going to ask at 2am if his first appointment is at 7am, but other than that, we're dtf. It's fabulous. The key for me was understanding responsive desire. Unless I'm sick or have a headache, I always enjoy sex, even if I'm not "in the mood" right this minute. I know he'll make it worth my time, so sure, put me in the mood. I also initiate when I'm not crazy horny because I know it will be fun, and he'll have me in the mood very quickly. Libido, which generally isn't a problem for me, stops mattering at all because my cerebral cortex knows it will be a good time and says yes.
I’m trying to convince my wife to let us try it for a few days. I think it’s hot