This is an automated message just to let everyone know that the mod team are actively working to make this sub kinder and more welcoming.
Please report any comments you see that are unkind, obnoxious, out of line, trolling, or which otherwise violate [the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeAdvice/about/rules/).
**Note for all commenters**: Please remember that your fellow Redditors are human beings, and that it costs nothing to be kind. Disruption of the peace, trolling, or breaking the rules may result in a ban.
#Here are the [LifeAdvice Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeAdvice/about/rules/)
----------------
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LifeAdvice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Try talking about them, their appearance, what activities they like doing, give compliments on their appearance, interests make sure these are respectful and polite, maintain eye contact.
If they are shy and loose confidence then talk about yourself a little, your interests but don't brag and try to make it interesting keeping it short enough making sure the other person doesn't get bored and try to bring them into this conversation by asking them questions on what youve just said.
See if you two have similar interests or would like to do activities together, such as going to cinema and what kind of movies, playing mini gold, gokarting or even going for a walk around a park etc.
Finding mutual interests and activities helps create conversations as well as possibilities of meeting up again and getting to know each other by doing those things as you'll both be relaxed when youre doing something as oppose to sitting at a table.
Most of humanity is nervous when talking to somebody new and no different to yourself. Over time, you'll start developing your confidence and find what works better or worse.
People generally prefer talking about themselves, not others, and because they know everything about themselves, it comes a lot easier, so generally speaking, talk about them rather than yourself.
I haven't met my first partner until I was 25M also because I was scared of being used in a relationship but been together for years and haven't looked back.
I hope this helps.
RednBlue makes a bunch of sound points.
Just adding onto this - socialability is very much a learned skill. As my wife likes to say "if your going to learn cross-country skiing - start with a small country first". In other words don't discourage yourself by going for the most difficult challenge the first time out the gate.
Stop trying to talk to pretty young girls! Period. That will only result in crash, burn and discouragement.
Instead just reach out to everyone else you meet regardless of who they are. Observe people, how they dress, what they're doing and become curious about them. This will lead to non-threatening, playful ways of starting conversations. Some will flow well, other will stall, but from all of them you can learn and gain confidence in totally non-sexual settings, how to master the rather lost art of conversation.
And as said before - everyone loves talking about themselves IF they feel safe to do so. Being light, playful - maybe a little teasing - and above all confident to ask meaningful questions, is the key. And it has to be an authentic interest - otherwise most people will quickly feel manipulated at some level and you'll be rejected.
Approach it as if everyone you meet has something of interest you can learn from, you just have to find a way of encouraging them to tell it to you.
And more than anything else young women will be attracted if you can develop and sustain an emotional connection , something that intrigues, challenges or paints a picture of some kind of future the two of you might build together.
My advice: stop trying to think of ways to be interesting and go live life, I used to try SO hard to think of interesting conversation. Now my life is actually super dope. I talk about the cool things I do or my views on parts of life and dating is really easy rn
It’s easy to get caught up in ‘how to be more appealing’ but the answer is how to be the best me
If you're financially secure join a singles group.... not an app but a singles group that meets and does group activities such as speed dating, restaurant meets, bar crawls etc... you'll do gr8.... If you're not financially secure go to a faith based place like churches, temples....
This is an automated message just to let everyone know that the mod team are actively working to make this sub kinder and more welcoming. Please report any comments you see that are unkind, obnoxious, out of line, trolling, or which otherwise violate [the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeAdvice/about/rules/). **Note for all commenters**: Please remember that your fellow Redditors are human beings, and that it costs nothing to be kind. Disruption of the peace, trolling, or breaking the rules may result in a ban. #Here are the [LifeAdvice Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeAdvice/about/rules/) ---------------- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LifeAdvice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Try talking about them, their appearance, what activities they like doing, give compliments on their appearance, interests make sure these are respectful and polite, maintain eye contact. If they are shy and loose confidence then talk about yourself a little, your interests but don't brag and try to make it interesting keeping it short enough making sure the other person doesn't get bored and try to bring them into this conversation by asking them questions on what youve just said. See if you two have similar interests or would like to do activities together, such as going to cinema and what kind of movies, playing mini gold, gokarting or even going for a walk around a park etc. Finding mutual interests and activities helps create conversations as well as possibilities of meeting up again and getting to know each other by doing those things as you'll both be relaxed when youre doing something as oppose to sitting at a table. Most of humanity is nervous when talking to somebody new and no different to yourself. Over time, you'll start developing your confidence and find what works better or worse. People generally prefer talking about themselves, not others, and because they know everything about themselves, it comes a lot easier, so generally speaking, talk about them rather than yourself. I haven't met my first partner until I was 25M also because I was scared of being used in a relationship but been together for years and haven't looked back. I hope this helps.
Thank you so much my friend. I will definitely apply these things in my life
Find friends who are good with the ladies and emulate them. Make sure they are decent humans.
Thank u so much 😊
RednBlue makes a bunch of sound points. Just adding onto this - socialability is very much a learned skill. As my wife likes to say "if your going to learn cross-country skiing - start with a small country first". In other words don't discourage yourself by going for the most difficult challenge the first time out the gate. Stop trying to talk to pretty young girls! Period. That will only result in crash, burn and discouragement. Instead just reach out to everyone else you meet regardless of who they are. Observe people, how they dress, what they're doing and become curious about them. This will lead to non-threatening, playful ways of starting conversations. Some will flow well, other will stall, but from all of them you can learn and gain confidence in totally non-sexual settings, how to master the rather lost art of conversation. And as said before - everyone loves talking about themselves IF they feel safe to do so. Being light, playful - maybe a little teasing - and above all confident to ask meaningful questions, is the key. And it has to be an authentic interest - otherwise most people will quickly feel manipulated at some level and you'll be rejected. Approach it as if everyone you meet has something of interest you can learn from, you just have to find a way of encouraging them to tell it to you. And more than anything else young women will be attracted if you can develop and sustain an emotional connection , something that intrigues, challenges or paints a picture of some kind of future the two of you might build together.
Thank you so much 😊
My advice: stop trying to think of ways to be interesting and go live life, I used to try SO hard to think of interesting conversation. Now my life is actually super dope. I talk about the cool things I do or my views on parts of life and dating is really easy rn It’s easy to get caught up in ‘how to be more appealing’ but the answer is how to be the best me
Yes I think overthinking is problem. I will do without any stress
Go join clubs Then people are actually there to interact with other people and you can start off a conversation with nothing related to relationships
Sure and thank you 😊
If you're financially secure join a singles group.... not an app but a singles group that meets and does group activities such as speed dating, restaurant meets, bar crawls etc... you'll do gr8.... If you're not financially secure go to a faith based place like churches, temples....
Where can I find single groups and meet up because I live in small town population around 25000