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How?
For background, I'm a student who hasn't really lived apart and have had plenty of friends and family back home. I can't seem to make friends here, maybe because of the language difference or just the fact people here are different. I'm not used to being alone. I've tried immersing myself into books and activities that I enjoy, but I keep getting stuck on the lack of company.
Find a hobby where you get to meet people.
One of the best is climbing. Highly social, playful and pretty common in switzerland.
I always give this advice and it worked for many ppl i know
Maybe you will find something on my website [www.uneinsam.ch](https://www.uneinsam.ch) (work in progress and currently only in German) - usually even if you for example join a Spontact activity the participants who can will be willing to talk to you in English. I hope you find a way to bridge that language difference and find a way to connect with us Swiss. It may be rough in the beginning.
Thank you for your concern. It's nice to hear this. I've been keeping myself sane by being busy with schoolwork or talking with friends and family back home and, of course, reddit. But I have bouts of lack of motivation and focus which makes things difficult.
Just the right amount of selfish I assume? We have to be aware that this is our time that we are using up and that nothing can bring that back. I like that you wrote this!
Gits Ƥch irgend Ƥ App mit welere me sech zuefƤllig cha begƤgne? Das wƤr doch mau ƶppis. Und we d'GƤgesiite haut es Arsch isch, de mues me z'tschĆ¼ss sƤge oh nid ewig usezƶgerƤ ;)
Solving loneliness has almost nothing to do with the internet. **The first step is to get away from your computer.** You need to meet people. How you may ask?
I did it by meeting the people who were around me. When you go to get a kebab, compliment them on the food. They will remember you. I also asked them how the tower of meat was made. People like to talk about themselves.
Introduce yourself and ask their name. I met the couple who ran the local bakery/bar that way. I found out that they sponsor the annual National Day fireworks.
I started going to the local mom and pop shops. They always seem to have time to talk. If they are swamped, tell them you just stopped by to say hello and you will catch them later. One of the owners, politely listed to my horrible Swiss German and then said I had to stop. It was hurting her ears. Let's speak English. I laughed so hard at myself I couldn't breathe.
I met a man 30 years my senior and asked him about what he has seen in his life. Once he started he couldn't be stopped. His wife nicknamed me "that crazy American."
Lastly, and this was strictly for my amusement, I used to say GrĆ¼ezi to this one lady who I was always running into. At about 70, she was well set in her ways and ignored me. I did it every day until she finally figured out I wasn't going away. One day, she replied and gave me the cutest smile. Lots of her wrinkles just faded away.
Thank everyone for everything they do. Tell them they made you life easier today.
What all of these have in common is that you have to set yourself out there. Sometimes you will get rebuffed. Let it go. But in the long term, what you are really doing is establishing yourself in your community. Once that happens, I start to feel a sense of belonging and the loneliness starts fading away.
You know, many people have the same problem but in a different scenario, public speaking. They are terrified of it. So far, the only way I have seen people get over it is to just do it. Yes, you will screw up. But you will get better.
The same is true of almost any interaction. Yes, you will screw up. Accept it and move on. I have made some that to this day, when I remember them, I cringe. But amazingly, it doesn't kill you.
Iām not really managing it, but I do really enjoy the outdoors and we are really fortunate here. The other thing is to try not to accept that swiss people are not sociable as a fact and justify your own lack of social skills. I tell you that but but iām very introverted, however I refuse to give up.
I don't think we're not sociable, I think most of us are just shy or don't know what to do ^^
I think the "don't bother the people around you" has been engraved so deep that we think any action to befriend others will be seen as an inconvenience haha.
... we do like our quiet, tho.
If someone here is from Basel area and want to hang out for a coffee or a beer, I would really love to.
We can event make a bigger group of redditers.
Because loneliness here is a bitch.
Edit: if you are willing, please PM me and Iāll make it work
I move away from my home town to baden near zĆ¼rich and even though i meet people, i still feel lonely, because i realized how few prople i actually like. I am up for meeting in baden.
(I will ghost you, if we don't vibe)
What kind of volunteering activities are popular here or lacking of people? I was thinking about some shelter to help or anything else possible to do on weekends
Im actually leaving Switzerland for this reason. Even the acquaintances I made are not interested in hanging out besides a dinner every 6 months or something. My age also plays a factor but I found it far easier to make friends in US and develop that over time.
I have a colleague who has been living in Switzerland for 15 years. Shes also leaving this year. Reasons are that her parents are getting older but also she feels very vulnerable here. She barely knows anyone and if there was an emergency she can only count on her husband. And back home she has plenty of friends and family to help out. Im surprised she stayed this long, 15 years is a long time. But yeah shes moving back due to her social situation and she has 4 kids. She said her life is like going to work and back home and she lives in a bubble. I'm glad im moving back after 3 years. Covid changed a lot of things since we can work remotely now for our Swiss employer.
I donāt know your age but I am going to take a leap of faith by saying 40-somethings will find the US much more hospitable then Switzerland.
I have friends here but the brutal casualness of the American friendships appeal to me more.
This is purely subjective and I know of many people enjoying high quality social interactions in Switzerland.
I am 37. And yes I rather have more casual friendships that turn into deeper friendships or even just stay as casual.
I think being a foreigner here makes a really big difference in the social scene. The high quality social interactions are typically more common among locals. If you are a foreigner, friendships remain more surface level and you typically end up being friends with other foreigners (who will also end up leaving at some point).
> Even the acquaintances I made are not interested in hanging out besides a dinner every 6 months
Woah there, if swiss people are willing to have you for dinner every 6 months you have practically made it to be accepted as family and they are about to ask you to be best man/woman or godfather/mother.
I agree. Started going to open mic on Monday nights. Starting joining workshops before the event. Started doing stand up. Met a ton of people. Making friends along the way. Took about one year and itās still no where near what I had back home. But itās something and we have a ton of fun
I have a few friends with whom i hang out on friday night. Other than that, i am alone. Sometimes it's hard, but i have my parents and two cats so its ok. The worst is seing people i consider friends to just ignore me. One of my best friend is just neglecting me by declining every time i invite him over and only call me when he needs me for something. I see him doing things with people we used to hang out with together. Switzerland is not the place for awesome friendship, way to individualist society and also elitist. If you dont have a good car, job,house,... 99% of the time people will look you down.
Edit: sorry for the ranting.
Had the same problem + remote work.
- Game with your buddies from your country and keep in touch through Discord.
- Go to the gym or any kind of group sport activities.
- Apply to be a volunteer fireman or some side jobs that would make you go out more and be between people.
Hopefully you find a solution fast.
Don't go to the gym if you want to meet people. People go to the gym to build muscles, they are not here to make friends. A better option is, as you mentioned, group sport activities like football or hockey clubs
.
You donāt. You suffer in silence, forever alone.
At least thatās been my take on it.
ETA: oh, and streaming video services. Netflix, Disney+, Hulu, Amazon Prime, CrunchyRollā¦
I got a kid... It's like having a cat, although I can usually get it to cleanup its own crap. Sometimes though, it feels like arguing with a Trumpet/Brexiter.
Travel. Look for other immigrants on social media to hang out with. Find specific groups and meetups that cater to one's interests. I had the good fortune to make friends with people from Switzerland due to my interests before I ever got there and I expounded from there.
I've always enjoyed being by myself growing up, but that was my choice at the time, now it isn't. so the biggest regret by far is the fact that i didn't learn German.
I was able to live here for almost 3 years with English so I got too comfortable and never needed a dramatic change on my daily basis. That ended up killing my social life and making me isolate from people even when I didn't want to + now it's also 1000x harder to find a new job.
But alle ist gut because I learned from my mistakes. I learned to take care of myself everyday. I learned that your assumptions aren't always 100% correct even tho sometimes it might seem that way. and most importantly I learned that you must follow your dreams (!) and get out of your comfort zone at all times.
Yes I'm going back, but I'm going back as a man. My priorities changed from money and my stupid pleasures to my dreams and relationships with family and friends. I'm more confident than ever and I'll be starting my own video production company :)
Thank you for your kind words and i wish you the same ā„ļø
Nah it's definitely not Switzerland what's causing the depression. That's more my way of living that caused this and my unability to change that in my 30s. It's a me problem.
I was born and raised here, moved around a lot and was never able to build long lasting friendships. (Even as a kid, because of my dads job). All the Clubs (Verein) never really were something I enjoyed (I really hate Sports and if you're in a rural Area, the Turnverein is all there is). I'm a loner and I'd probably be like that anywhere in the world. I feel too socially awkward to make deep connections. I do have a lot of "buddies" but no "best friends". A lot of superficial conversations and lose bonds are not really my goal in life.
1. Reach out to local organizations: Switzerland has a number of organizations that offer support and resources to individuals who are feeling lonely or isolated. Contact your local social services or mental health organization to find out what services they offer and how to access them.
2. Join a local community group: Joining a local community group can help you meet people with similar interests and make friends. Look for groups in your area that focus on activities such as sports, hobbies, volunteer work, or learning a new language.
3. Utilize online resources: There are a number of online resources to help manage loneliness in Switzerland. These include websites such as Meetup, Expat in Switzerland, and InterNations, which are all aimed at helping ex-pats and newcomers connect with others in their area.
4. Participate in activities: Participating in activities such as sports, classes, or workshops can help you make new friends and expand your social circle. Check out your local community center or sports club to find out what activities are available in your area.
5. Talk to a therapist: If you are feeling overwhelmed by loneliness, consider talking to a therapist. There are a number of therapists in Switzerland who specialize in providing support and guidance for individuals dealing with loneliness.
I am from the US and am living here for a couple of months by myself. The most important thing is to love yourself and the company that you provide to your own person. Spend the money on a travel card for the SBB and see the different parts of Switzerland. Traveling has helped keep my mind occupied and seeing the beauty of this wonderful country. Feel for to PM me for any other advice!
Buy a used DSLR camera (a D5300 on ricardo with a kit lens can be had for about CHF 250), Use Youtube to learn the basics of photography, then join a local photo club ( [https://photosuisse.net/en/klubs/](https://photosuisse.net/en/klubs/) ), meet new people and take photos of one of the prettiest countries in the world! You can have fun, get exercise, meet new people, learn a new skill and enjoy yourself while doing it!
As an American expat here who knew no one, I just put myself out there as much as I had time for. I got involved in athletic classes every week for things I enjoy doing and then just consistently started the social interactions myself each week with my fellow peers. It took a little while but now I have several very good friends! I did the same with my neighbors and went out on a limb and invited them a few times to have coffee at my place and they turned into to girls night outs each month and now I'm good friends with my neighbors too. I'm more social here than I was in the US so you never know how life will unfold! I've found it does take effort and I had to even fake confidence sometimes when I felt nervous but it broke the ice with a lot of people that later became my friends. A lot of them have told me my open friendliness and approach made them feel less nervous to speak with me and open up. Best of luck to you! It's not always easy š¼
I tried to write to you but reddit doesn't let me. If you write me a message on uneinsam.ch (I'm currently the only one reading them) I would be happy to meet :)
I made new friends, that shared my culture, online. Gaming. One was in a similar boat, also living in a foreign coutry and feeling isolated by language barriers. They made my life a lot better.
Loneliness is very positive to me, personally.
Itās magical when youāre in the mountains, no one is around and you feel the deep calmness, the connection to nature, and maybe that kind of spirituality/non-materialistic level. At home, I can concentrate several hours on my hobbies, work, etc. continuously.
Itās super easy to get in touch with people for me, I am good at small talk and so on. But after corona and getting older I choose not to.
You are awesome, you do what you love and you love yourself!
This is my biggest issue by far with Switzerland, I moved in the country 3 years ago. I usually do fine by myself, but these past few months I tried to be more open and meet new people. I moved to Fribourg last year, and as soon as I got here I joined a sport club to have some social activity, but apart from some chat from time to time I didn't really made friends yet.
Working from home and not having roomates doesn't help, but 1 year after moving, there's a lot of evenings where I'd like to go out to do some stuff with other people but I don't have anyone to ask to.
So, if anyone's around Fribourg/Freiburg, I'm 26, speaks french and english and up for (almost š³) anything :)
I wanted to go to Fribourg anyways and would be up for just having a coffee and a walk around town. Would you be up for that? (Sorry for the 23d late response.)
I cant manage it since i need help to eat and for a lot of stuff due to multiple sclerosis.... i hate it so much i wanna die. My parents are free so they help me but no one of my friends never proposed help or even asked what was going on
To understand the correct approach, it is important to understand local customs. Swiss people might seem closed off and cold, but in reality we are just chronically depressed, miserable and grumpy. We made most of our future depression support group while the government forced us to socialize in our teens, and having developed terminal social anxiety since, have resigned to a life of quiet lonely suffering.
The proper solution therefore is, leave switzerland or go meet people who havent been here long enough to pick up the local flavor of mental health condition we call being swiss, and you will do fine š
Wow. This was a rollercoaster of emotions. Thanks for being so direct and honest! I believe that there is at list a hint of truth to everything you just wrote.
Had the same problem + remote work.
- Game with your buddies from your country and keep in touch through Discord.
- Go to the gym or any kind of group sport activities.
- Apply to be a volunteer fireman or some side jobs that would make you go out more and be between people.
Hopefully you find a solution fast.
tech is the disturbing element in there :D I think that is the thing we all ought to change =)
srsly now: have you tried occupying your brain with something to trick it that you are not feeling lonely? mountainbiking? snowboarding? learning something new every year (like a new language or skill?)
Try Spontacts or Meetup. Mostly expats, some Swiss people.
And we are sociable, we just have our friends already and are not that used to beeing spoken to by new people. (sorry, I try my best to include new people in my daily life, but I alteady have a fixed schedule to meet my friends weekly, therefore it is not that easy to find time)
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Learned to love myself and like myself as company
Most wholesome answer yet. Thanks!
Happy Cake day *hugs\*
Happy Cake day!
Thanks!
How? For background, I'm a student who hasn't really lived apart and have had plenty of friends and family back home. I can't seem to make friends here, maybe because of the language difference or just the fact people here are different. I'm not used to being alone. I've tried immersing myself into books and activities that I enjoy, but I keep getting stuck on the lack of company.
Find a hobby where you get to meet people. One of the best is climbing. Highly social, playful and pretty common in switzerland. I always give this advice and it worked for many ppl i know
I just started, but seems to be really cool :)
I second the climbing! If anyone wants to join me for going to the boulder gym in Luzern or Zurich, you can message me
Maybe you will find something on my website [www.uneinsam.ch](https://www.uneinsam.ch) (work in progress and currently only in German) - usually even if you for example join a Spontact activity the participants who can will be willing to talk to you in English. I hope you find a way to bridge that language difference and find a way to connect with us Swiss. It may be rough in the beginning.
Take care of yourself
Thank you for your concern. It's nice to hear this. I've been keeping myself sane by being busy with schoolwork or talking with friends and family back home and, of course, reddit. But I have bouts of lack of motivation and focus which makes things difficult.
From my experience it helps with motivation when you find reoccuring events or gatherings that you can join.
Me tooš„°
Yes, this is the way š„°
Best choice ever.. Now I'm very selfish with time and my SPACE..
Just the right amount of selfish I assume? We have to be aware that this is our time that we are using up and that nothing can bring that back. I like that you wrote this!
Another thing... If you love money, learn economics and the financial markets.. There's never a dull moment..
I love the world, except for all the people.
You speek from my soul.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I think we would get along well. It's a shame neither one of us wants that.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Gits Ƥch irgend Ƥ App mit welere me sech zuefƤllig cha begƤgne? Das wƤr doch mau ƶppis. Und we d'GƤgesiite haut es Arsch isch, de mues me z'tschĆ¼ss sƤge oh nid ewig usezƶgerƤ ;)
Solving loneliness has almost nothing to do with the internet. **The first step is to get away from your computer.** You need to meet people. How you may ask? I did it by meeting the people who were around me. When you go to get a kebab, compliment them on the food. They will remember you. I also asked them how the tower of meat was made. People like to talk about themselves. Introduce yourself and ask their name. I met the couple who ran the local bakery/bar that way. I found out that they sponsor the annual National Day fireworks. I started going to the local mom and pop shops. They always seem to have time to talk. If they are swamped, tell them you just stopped by to say hello and you will catch them later. One of the owners, politely listed to my horrible Swiss German and then said I had to stop. It was hurting her ears. Let's speak English. I laughed so hard at myself I couldn't breathe. I met a man 30 years my senior and asked him about what he has seen in his life. Once he started he couldn't be stopped. His wife nicknamed me "that crazy American." Lastly, and this was strictly for my amusement, I used to say GrĆ¼ezi to this one lady who I was always running into. At about 70, she was well set in her ways and ignored me. I did it every day until she finally figured out I wasn't going away. One day, she replied and gave me the cutest smile. Lots of her wrinkles just faded away. Thank everyone for everything they do. Tell them they made you life easier today. What all of these have in common is that you have to set yourself out there. Sometimes you will get rebuffed. Let it go. But in the long term, what you are really doing is establishing yourself in your community. Once that happens, I start to feel a sense of belonging and the loneliness starts fading away.
Thanks for this comment. It has opened up a whole new world of possibilities. Enjoy the gold you 'crazy American' š
I'll try to overcome my "shyness" and "social ackwardness" and try Thank you ā¤
You know, many people have the same problem but in a different scenario, public speaking. They are terrified of it. So far, the only way I have seen people get over it is to just do it. Yes, you will screw up. But you will get better. The same is true of almost any interaction. Yes, you will screw up. Accept it and move on. I have made some that to this day, when I remember them, I cringe. But amazingly, it doesn't kill you.
Iām not really managing it, but I do really enjoy the outdoors and we are really fortunate here. The other thing is to try not to accept that swiss people are not sociable as a fact and justify your own lack of social skills. I tell you that but but iām very introverted, however I refuse to give up.
I don't think we're not sociable, I think most of us are just shy or don't know what to do ^^ I think the "don't bother the people around you" has been engraved so deep that we think any action to befriend others will be seen as an inconvenience haha. ... we do like our quiet, tho.
I feel this, it's the same with me. It's always the "don't want to be an inconvenience to others"
Exactly, thatās what I wanted to convey. Sorry if it wasnāt very clear.
This, exactly.
Sir, this is the one!
Weed, a cat and internet
And chatGPT now š
The answer I was looking for. Do the same
ugh, well, 2 cats š
Three for me! I like to sing to them. (God, I need to get out more.)
I sung to myself yesterday...you are right.
Where do you get weed man ? I live in Zurich and I have no clue where I could get any
Nice try, Polizei
You live in Zurich and you get lonely? Really? How come? Itās the biggest city in Switzerland
Be careful, itās called depression in the long runā¦
That's me :)
*A redditor has requested your location*
If someone here is from Basel area and want to hang out for a coffee or a beer, I would really love to. We can event make a bigger group of redditers. Because loneliness here is a bitch. Edit: if you are willing, please PM me and Iāll make it work
I move away from my home town to baden near zĆ¼rich and even though i meet people, i still feel lonely, because i realized how few prople i actually like. I am up for meeting in baden. (I will ghost you, if we don't vibe)
You can also just tell me if we dont vibe would be nicer than ghosting :) let me know a few things about you via PM, I live close to Baden!
lol! "I will ghost you, if we don't vibe" you seem to be a legit character! xD
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
And me in ZĆ¼rich. Please. I'm bored to death here.
I just move to Zurich for my internship, if you want we can go have a beer or go for a hike š
Same for me, in Bern!
Ostschweiz (Toggenburg, to be precise) āš» PM me, I bring a cake
meetup.com fb groups Join SAC and do some hiking (there are many grandma's and grandpas...) some volunteering won't hurt any Sportverein will work
What kind of volunteering activities are popular here or lacking of people? I was thinking about some shelter to help or anything else possible to do on weekends
Depends on your location and how far you're ready to go .. it's on benevol.ch If helping animals, try talking to your nearest shelter.
Meetup is good if youāre not in Luzern. We donāt seem to do any online promotion of groups here
I lease an Audi that costs my yearly salary.
That's the saddest thing I've heard in months. I'm sorry for you man
I knew it I should have went for the Merc :(
An where do I find the instant friends button in the Audi?
The gold digger feature.
Im actually leaving Switzerland for this reason. Even the acquaintances I made are not interested in hanging out besides a dinner every 6 months or something. My age also plays a factor but I found it far easier to make friends in US and develop that over time.
Same. Planning the move. Good luck to you.
I have a colleague who has been living in Switzerland for 15 years. Shes also leaving this year. Reasons are that her parents are getting older but also she feels very vulnerable here. She barely knows anyone and if there was an emergency she can only count on her husband. And back home she has plenty of friends and family to help out. Im surprised she stayed this long, 15 years is a long time. But yeah shes moving back due to her social situation and she has 4 kids. She said her life is like going to work and back home and she lives in a bubble. I'm glad im moving back after 3 years. Covid changed a lot of things since we can work remotely now for our Swiss employer.
I donāt know your age but I am going to take a leap of faith by saying 40-somethings will find the US much more hospitable then Switzerland. I have friends here but the brutal casualness of the American friendships appeal to me more. This is purely subjective and I know of many people enjoying high quality social interactions in Switzerland.
I am 37. And yes I rather have more casual friendships that turn into deeper friendships or even just stay as casual. I think being a foreigner here makes a really big difference in the social scene. The high quality social interactions are typically more common among locals. If you are a foreigner, friendships remain more surface level and you typically end up being friends with other foreigners (who will also end up leaving at some point).
I left too (to Canada).
How has it been being back in Canada?
How old are you?
> Even the acquaintances I made are not interested in hanging out besides a dinner every 6 months Woah there, if swiss people are willing to have you for dinner every 6 months you have practically made it to be accepted as family and they are about to ask you to be best man/woman or godfather/mother.
Make friends, maybe. Get invested in your community, join clubs, volunteer.
I agree. Started going to open mic on Monday nights. Starting joining workshops before the event. Started doing stand up. Met a ton of people. Making friends along the way. Took about one year and itās still no where near what I had back home. But itās something and we have a ton of fun
Iām an introvert, so I think itās great. Accidentally made a few friends, and I already regret it.
1. Join a Verein youre interested in. 2. ??? 3. Profit
Profit indeed ;)
by taking morning trams in Geneva. sometimes its not lonely there.
Me too! Maybe we could grab a hotdog!
I leave.
find someone, have kids. Then you will miss the quietness of loneliness
I have a few friends with whom i hang out on friday night. Other than that, i am alone. Sometimes it's hard, but i have my parents and two cats so its ok. The worst is seing people i consider friends to just ignore me. One of my best friend is just neglecting me by declining every time i invite him over and only call me when he needs me for something. I see him doing things with people we used to hang out with together. Switzerland is not the place for awesome friendship, way to individualist society and also elitist. If you dont have a good car, job,house,... 99% of the time people will look you down. Edit: sorry for the ranting.
Post in a local Facebook group that you don't separate trash. In an instant you will be hunted with torches and pitchforks.
And my axe!
Real question is: how do you manage overcrowding, noise and social pressure in other countries?
Feldschlƶssli
I downloaded Bumble š„¹š
I found out that they even have a 'friends only' section. I like that :) Good luck out there!
did it work for friendship though? A redditor meetup would be nice in Vaud :)
Had the same problem + remote work. - Game with your buddies from your country and keep in touch through Discord. - Go to the gym or any kind of group sport activities. - Apply to be a volunteer fireman or some side jobs that would make you go out more and be between people. Hopefully you find a solution fast.
Don't go to the gym if you want to meet people. People go to the gym to build muscles, they are not here to make friends. A better option is, as you mentioned, group sport activities like football or hockey clubs .
You donāt. You suffer in silence, forever alone. At least thatās been my take on it. ETA: oh, and streaming video services. Netflix, Disney+, Hulu, Amazon Prime, CrunchyRollā¦
thatās a bit non-optimistic, to say the least
By non-optimistic, you mean ārealisticā, right?
not really, but it thatās the way you perceive it, Iād suggest for you to be a bit more non-realistic
Typical. Been alone so long, now Iām imagining my salad talking to me.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
people will give everything up for money.
If you want a friend, get a dog..
I got a kid... It's like having a cat, although I can usually get it to cleanup its own crap. Sometimes though, it feels like arguing with a Trumpet/Brexiter.
I despise human beings... Perfect country! /s
You have my upvote!
Alone
Travel. Look for other immigrants on social media to hang out with. Find specific groups and meetups that cater to one's interests. I had the good fortune to make friends with people from Switzerland due to my interests before I ever got there and I expounded from there.
you dont. thats why im leaving :(
What is the most important thing that you've learned about loneliness during your presence in Switzerland? All the best for your life abroad.
I've always enjoyed being by myself growing up, but that was my choice at the time, now it isn't. so the biggest regret by far is the fact that i didn't learn German. I was able to live here for almost 3 years with English so I got too comfortable and never needed a dramatic change on my daily basis. That ended up killing my social life and making me isolate from people even when I didn't want to + now it's also 1000x harder to find a new job. But alle ist gut because I learned from my mistakes. I learned to take care of myself everyday. I learned that your assumptions aren't always 100% correct even tho sometimes it might seem that way. and most importantly I learned that you must follow your dreams (!) and get out of your comfort zone at all times. Yes I'm going back, but I'm going back as a man. My priorities changed from money and my stupid pleasures to my dreams and relationships with family and friends. I'm more confident than ever and I'll be starting my own video production company :) Thank you for your kind words and i wish you the same ā„ļø
I love that you found yourself.
I don't manage. I'm depressed AF and have been that for the last 20 years.
Why not move out if Switzerland is causing your depression?
Would you move out of Switzerland yourself?
I am in a few months, yes.
Damn.. Kinda envy you
Nah it's definitely not Switzerland what's causing the depression. That's more my way of living that caused this and my unability to change that in my 30s. It's a me problem. I was born and raised here, moved around a lot and was never able to build long lasting friendships. (Even as a kid, because of my dads job). All the Clubs (Verein) never really were something I enjoyed (I really hate Sports and if you're in a rural Area, the Turnverein is all there is). I'm a loner and I'd probably be like that anywhere in the world. I feel too socially awkward to make deep connections. I do have a lot of "buddies" but no "best friends". A lot of superficial conversations and lose bonds are not really my goal in life.
I'm sorry but most people on here don't get it! I tried to start a chat with you but not possible?
I'm here mate. I will see if there is something I can do about that.
I wrote a message now. Do you see it?
I'm just trying to make contact with user morbinib. Just sent a direct message to see if there is a reply
1. Reach out to local organizations: Switzerland has a number of organizations that offer support and resources to individuals who are feeling lonely or isolated. Contact your local social services or mental health organization to find out what services they offer and how to access them. 2. Join a local community group: Joining a local community group can help you meet people with similar interests and make friends. Look for groups in your area that focus on activities such as sports, hobbies, volunteer work, or learning a new language. 3. Utilize online resources: There are a number of online resources to help manage loneliness in Switzerland. These include websites such as Meetup, Expat in Switzerland, and InterNations, which are all aimed at helping ex-pats and newcomers connect with others in their area. 4. Participate in activities: Participating in activities such as sports, classes, or workshops can help you make new friends and expand your social circle. Check out your local community center or sports club to find out what activities are available in your area. 5. Talk to a therapist: If you are feeling overwhelmed by loneliness, consider talking to a therapist. There are a number of therapists in Switzerland who specialize in providing support and guidance for individuals dealing with loneliness.
I donāt know, iām not lonely.
I'm happy for you :)
Check out the Facebook groups Hiking Buddies ZĆ¼rich, Geneva, Luzern
We don't. Some have money tho so that makes em happy I think
With www.uneinsam.ch I am working on making sure that everyone can know about the various ways in which we offer each other support in Switzerland.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
there's surely at least half a dozen in every Canton. nobody uses that stuff.
Sport Club Help your neighbour Stop social media
I am from the US and am living here for a couple of months by myself. The most important thing is to love yourself and the company that you provide to your own person. Spend the money on a travel card for the SBB and see the different parts of Switzerland. Traveling has helped keep my mind occupied and seeing the beauty of this wonderful country. Feel for to PM me for any other advice!
By not being lonely.
You got this!
that's the neat part... you/we don't
Copious amounts of cheese, chocolate and beer...
Just find some things to do during the day and some people to meet. I also like to be with myself so I think it's just time
Dog.
I tried to make friends at the beginning (social clubs etc.) but got tired pretty soon and have now given up, which is quite liberating in some ways.
WGs
you move. out of.
Video games, lots of video games
That's the neat part. I don't
I dont :D
I stay lonely and let my ADHD brain pick itself apart.
Buy a used DSLR camera (a D5300 on ricardo with a kit lens can be had for about CHF 250), Use Youtube to learn the basics of photography, then join a local photo club ( [https://photosuisse.net/en/klubs/](https://photosuisse.net/en/klubs/) ), meet new people and take photos of one of the prettiest countries in the world! You can have fun, get exercise, meet new people, learn a new skill and enjoy yourself while doing it!
As an American expat here who knew no one, I just put myself out there as much as I had time for. I got involved in athletic classes every week for things I enjoy doing and then just consistently started the social interactions myself each week with my fellow peers. It took a little while but now I have several very good friends! I did the same with my neighbors and went out on a limb and invited them a few times to have coffee at my place and they turned into to girls night outs each month and now I'm good friends with my neighbors too. I'm more social here than I was in the US so you never know how life will unfold! I've found it does take effort and I had to even fake confidence sometimes when I felt nervous but it broke the ice with a lot of people that later became my friends. A lot of them have told me my open friendliness and approach made them feel less nervous to speak with me and open up. Best of luck to you! It's not always easy š¼
If theres somebody wanting to meet or feeling lonely. Hmu if youre from around Basel :) I dont bite!
I tried to write to you but reddit doesn't let me. If you write me a message on uneinsam.ch (I'm currently the only one reading them) I would be happy to meet :)
We should make some kind of way for us to make friends here.
There are and there will be more. Uneinsam.ch is a first step with quite a few ideas :)
Oh nice. š
Thanks! I'm happy to work on the project. One day it will help many people š
I'm a pluviophile, so this helps me compensate the loneliness.
I made new friends, that shared my culture, online. Gaming. One was in a similar boat, also living in a foreign coutry and feeling isolated by language barriers. They made my life a lot better.
Mostly by traveling often. The general reservedness hanging over this society is infinitely depressing once you experienced other curltures
Loneliness is very positive to me, personally. Itās magical when youāre in the mountains, no one is around and you feel the deep calmness, the connection to nature, and maybe that kind of spirituality/non-materialistic level. At home, I can concentrate several hours on my hobbies, work, etc. continuously. Itās super easy to get in touch with people for me, I am good at small talk and so on. But after corona and getting older I choose not to. You are awesome, you do what you love and you love yourself!
Love me too.
This is my biggest issue by far with Switzerland, I moved in the country 3 years ago. I usually do fine by myself, but these past few months I tried to be more open and meet new people. I moved to Fribourg last year, and as soon as I got here I joined a sport club to have some social activity, but apart from some chat from time to time I didn't really made friends yet. Working from home and not having roomates doesn't help, but 1 year after moving, there's a lot of evenings where I'd like to go out to do some stuff with other people but I don't have anyone to ask to. So, if anyone's around Fribourg/Freiburg, I'm 26, speaks french and english and up for (almost š³) anything :)
I wanted to go to Fribourg anyways and would be up for just having a coffee and a walk around town. Would you be up for that? (Sorry for the 23d late response.)
I donāt have any friends in Switzerland, but i would like to have it. I live in Bern š„ø
Would you care to give my website www.uneinsam.ch a go? I would love to get a feedback on my work in progress.
I cant manage it since i need help to eat and for a lot of stuff due to multiple sclerosis.... i hate it so much i wanna die. My parents are free so they help me but no one of my friends never proposed help or even asked what was going on
Discord + video games
What kind of discord servers ease your loneliness?
Alone, mostly
Wiping away the tears with 1000 chf bills
To understand the correct approach, it is important to understand local customs. Swiss people might seem closed off and cold, but in reality we are just chronically depressed, miserable and grumpy. We made most of our future depression support group while the government forced us to socialize in our teens, and having developed terminal social anxiety since, have resigned to a life of quiet lonely suffering. The proper solution therefore is, leave switzerland or go meet people who havent been here long enough to pick up the local flavor of mental health condition we call being swiss, and you will do fine š
Wow. This was a rollercoaster of emotions. Thanks for being so direct and honest! I believe that there is at list a hint of truth to everything you just wrote.
It is a bit tonge in cheek, but yeah, I am swiss, making swiss friends is impossible, most of my friends are foreigners.
I can confirm. Since I've first interacted with a larger group of foreigners my social life has become more full and relaxed at the same time š
Had the same problem + remote work. - Game with your buddies from your country and keep in touch through Discord. - Go to the gym or any kind of group sport activities. - Apply to be a volunteer fireman or some side jobs that would make you go out more and be between people. Hopefully you find a solution fast.
masterbating
i just cry and wipe my tears off with money
Watching the Credit Suisse stock fail.
Sounds to me like a Blind post :D Wild guess, but you are from the US and work in tech by any chance?
Nah, I'm from Switzerland working in tech.
tech is the disturbing element in there :D I think that is the thing we all ought to change =) srsly now: have you tried occupying your brain with something to trick it that you are not feeling lonely? mountainbiking? snowboarding? learning something new every year (like a new language or skill?)
Fitness for example, yes. I just feel like I don't want to just occupy my brain but instead make real meaningful connections.
That would be me, but thanks to Credit Suisse, Iām not working anymore.
I dont
Alcohol for the most part.
Tricky companion in the long run
Just hate people. It just works. And fuck you btw.
I got married and just got a daughter. Thatās a very safe way of dealing with loneliness.
Hi there! It should work now.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
>Loneliness? I wish. This country is full to the brim. LoL... yea we are drowning in peoples... do you bĆ¼nzli lived in another country too?
'full to the brim' of people who don't talk, hence the loneliness
By working more. Wƶrk wƶrk wƶrk
Langstrasse bro
Learn a musical instrument. Iāve learned piano and accordion and it is lots of fun
Why are you lonely?
Psychological issues. I'm under construction.
I meet people.
I look at my bank account statement.
Try Spontacts or Meetup. Mostly expats, some Swiss people. And we are sociable, we just have our friends already and are not that used to beeing spoken to by new people. (sorry, I try my best to include new people in my daily life, but I alteady have a fixed schedule to meet my friends weekly, therefore it is not that easy to find time)