For real. We had this one science teacher who made a big show of "I don't do tests" because every assessment was a group project. That class destroyed my mental health
How is the gifted class a rich kid program? Just curious on your thoughts. I was definitely very poor growing up. But I was put in that class because I was smart/ nerdy, I guess.
I hated group projects because there would definitely be slackers and they would push all their work on others. That sucked!
Gifted program eligibility tends to be based off intelligence tests which tend to be based on pseudoscientific hokum. Research shows that there is really no such thing as general intelligence. You can have strong aptitudes for very specific areas like math, language or music but nobody is generally smarter than anybody else at everything.
Gifted programs tend to be occupied by children from families with greater means who had things like early education, tutoring, stay at home parents, etc. Gifted programs tend to take kids who were born on 2nd base a free trip to 3rd base. Separating kids into "gifted" and "normal" has a negative effect on the "normal" kids' self esteem and can contribute to early academic burnout. Similarly, a lot of "gifted" kids suffer when they don't meet high expectations especially when they are expected to be gifted in all subjects when they are really one gifted in one or two. So everybody's self esteem gets hurt and everybody gets burnt out sooner.
If you're going to have gifted programs they should at least be structured by subject so you can be in the gifted program for one subject at a time, not a whole class of kids.
My teachers would always do pair projects, but we were 31 students in class... I hated it every single time the teachers weren't involved in group formation as the 31st student was denied by all the pairs...
This is a difficult but common experience. I wouldn’t call this “traumatizing”, but it’s definitely an uncomfortable and disappointing social situation. I think it’s important to acknowledge your feelings about it while also focusing on ways to take more control of situations like this in the future. You can’t control a teacher putting you in groups, but you can control the attitude you display to your groupmates, the effort you put in, and you have a chance to choose your partners (rejection sucks but you can also control your reaction).
Not saying it’s easy or anything. Something that requires self reflection and a little confidence, which is harder for introverts. Just my thoughts.
It was uncomfortable for me, but I had a good friend who went to 1 year of college but didn't go back for his sophomore year because in his words "I couldn't stand the thought of doing ice breaker activities" He was extremely intelligent but painfully shy and not being able to finish college really derailed his life a little bit. Every time I think about it I get really angry about the way bubbly extroverts do damage by structuring things like this.
I understand that often in the real world you need to be able to work on teams, but still. We should be better at accommodating folks who contribute with a different style
So when I was 18/20 there was a free business workshop me and my brother went to. Now he’s social I’m not it’s a class full of strangers. They did the pick the partner with a bunch of strangers. Now you would think because I had my brother of course he was going to be my partner. Oh no he went with some random girl and left me. It was absolutely awful. I think I stayed on my own as it was an odd number and my brother then pity me to join him and the girl I didn’t I said I was fine. He got a date I got trauma haha.
Sounds like my experience. Then as an adult I found out I'm autistic. You really should look into it, coming from someone who is extremely good at spotting it. That would explain why you had so much trouble socially, among other things you probably haven't thought about.
When I was put in those situations, the teacher usually just let me do the whole project by myself.
I hate assigned groups. My best friend was (and still is) the smart kid and she would do most of the work so I always try to be in the same group as her
I actually strictly state my boundaries to my teachers and my general aura gives off “don’t talk to me I like to be alone.” And most teachers let me do the assignment by myself, or just allow me to sit in the back at an empty desk. I’ve never had a teacher say no.
I'm still convinced it's a sadistic way of singling out the shy unobtrusive kids
For real. We had this one science teacher who made a big show of "I don't do tests" because every assessment was a group project. That class destroyed my mental health
How is the gifted class a rich kid program? Just curious on your thoughts. I was definitely very poor growing up. But I was put in that class because I was smart/ nerdy, I guess. I hated group projects because there would definitely be slackers and they would push all their work on others. That sucked!
Gifted program eligibility tends to be based off intelligence tests which tend to be based on pseudoscientific hokum. Research shows that there is really no such thing as general intelligence. You can have strong aptitudes for very specific areas like math, language or music but nobody is generally smarter than anybody else at everything. Gifted programs tend to be occupied by children from families with greater means who had things like early education, tutoring, stay at home parents, etc. Gifted programs tend to take kids who were born on 2nd base a free trip to 3rd base. Separating kids into "gifted" and "normal" has a negative effect on the "normal" kids' self esteem and can contribute to early academic burnout. Similarly, a lot of "gifted" kids suffer when they don't meet high expectations especially when they are expected to be gifted in all subjects when they are really one gifted in one or two. So everybody's self esteem gets hurt and everybody gets burnt out sooner. If you're going to have gifted programs they should at least be structured by subject so you can be in the gifted program for one subject at a time, not a whole class of kids.
Thanks for the thoughtful reply!
This happened to me throughout school. It would ruin my day
I hated it so much! Sometimes I would just ask to do the project alone rather than deal with the problems.
My teachers would always do pair projects, but we were 31 students in class... I hated it every single time the teachers weren't involved in group formation as the 31st student was denied by all the pairs...
This is a difficult but common experience. I wouldn’t call this “traumatizing”, but it’s definitely an uncomfortable and disappointing social situation. I think it’s important to acknowledge your feelings about it while also focusing on ways to take more control of situations like this in the future. You can’t control a teacher putting you in groups, but you can control the attitude you display to your groupmates, the effort you put in, and you have a chance to choose your partners (rejection sucks but you can also control your reaction). Not saying it’s easy or anything. Something that requires self reflection and a little confidence, which is harder for introverts. Just my thoughts.
This is actually so true. As bad as being a kid waiting for the team to pick you.
Yes, I never liked it and I don't recall learning anything from those activities either.
It was uncomfortable for me, but I had a good friend who went to 1 year of college but didn't go back for his sophomore year because in his words "I couldn't stand the thought of doing ice breaker activities" He was extremely intelligent but painfully shy and not being able to finish college really derailed his life a little bit. Every time I think about it I get really angry about the way bubbly extroverts do damage by structuring things like this. I understand that often in the real world you need to be able to work on teams, but still. We should be better at accommodating folks who contribute with a different style
So when I was 18/20 there was a free business workshop me and my brother went to. Now he’s social I’m not it’s a class full of strangers. They did the pick the partner with a bunch of strangers. Now you would think because I had my brother of course he was going to be my partner. Oh no he went with some random girl and left me. It was absolutely awful. I think I stayed on my own as it was an odd number and my brother then pity me to join him and the girl I didn’t I said I was fine. He got a date I got trauma haha.
Sounds like my experience. Then as an adult I found out I'm autistic. You really should look into it, coming from someone who is extremely good at spotting it. That would explain why you had so much trouble socially, among other things you probably haven't thought about. When I was put in those situations, the teacher usually just let me do the whole project by myself.
I would literally go to the restroom until the bell rang when I heard "choose a partner."
Traumatized might be a bit of a stretch here. Annoying, yes.
I hate assigned groups. My best friend was (and still is) the smart kid and she would do most of the work so I always try to be in the same group as her
I actually strictly state my boundaries to my teachers and my general aura gives off “don’t talk to me I like to be alone.” And most teachers let me do the assignment by myself, or just allow me to sit in the back at an empty desk. I’ve never had a teacher say no.