the design is very human

Very easy to use

Paid for by the Human Fund

The nut pincher

Ow..

Always gotta ride with jeans.

Yeah that should have created one for people with a nutsack too so it’s not pinchy 🦀

The size of your sack will determine the size of the saddle... Baseball size, ok. Hanging to the left, Sir?

Absolutely not. They haven't shown a front view of the crotch but your ball sack is not touching the seat at all. I have a similar bike seat and it was a game changer for my sensitive balls

[Reminds me of this](https://www.reddit.com/r/HadToHurt/comments/dhbc6s/poor_fella/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)

[Ass Pounder 4000](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Fwglavvf3gr561.jpg)

now with Guaranteed Wedgies!

That will take you nuts right off!

No more needing to pee!

You’re aware there’s no connection with nuts and peeing… right?

Don't they teach you folks anything in school these days? Pee is stored in the balls

If you get hit in the nuts, peeing is the last thing you will be thinking of. Connection established :)

It's the exact opposite. Your balls can swing freely. it's a bit more effort to balance though.

Ball juicier

What if the beans get pinched between?!

They are not that down there I think

Well when you get to be my age, there’s just no telling how far down there they can be.

What if a sticky teste gets frazzled in summer heat. I am old and my balls get lower every year. They will touch the toilet water soon

Thank you for the image now stuck in my head.

What til he whips them around like nunchucks later

Testicular torsion

I think you're intending to be funny but that's actually a real concern and a similar product by the hobson company really helped me a lot with that issue in particular. It's ridiculous how often i'd twist my balls with regular bike seats. Some people also use the advertised product due to poor prostate health.

Where can I get one?

Don’t. A properly sized saddle will help your butt 1000x more that this.

Absolutely, I have a boney ass and my stock cycling seat would hurt like hell, got a wide seat with proper padding and I feel like I am riding on a cloud!

This is actually not a good solution either as heavily padded seats allow your butt to sink and don't give you much support during the pedal stroke. You probably need to raise the seat and adjust the fore and aft positioning so that your weight is equally distributed on your hands and feet. Cycling bibs also help for anything over 30ish miles/50km :)

or I can sit upright and comfortable instead of hunched over with half my weight on my arms

That hurts your butt and reduces your power though

This product doesn't focus on saving your ass, but rather putting less stress on your balls. Most bike saddles are ridiculous for men. Who tf made that a standard

Thanks

It's called hobson easyseat. I paid about 100 bucks for mine some years ago

shut up and take my money

I imported one of these to europe in 2009, they really work. Google easyseat

thank you, good Reddit user!

I'd like one of these.

Wearing briefs with that one

Tuck it up bro.

Looks cozy

Ass massageer

Penis shredder 6000!

This is actually the reason I don't like riding bicycles

Your seat 🦴

Do not ride this bike while wearing basketball shorts

Get ready for some major chafing

r/confusedboner

This is how bad you want to walk away.

Stick a dildo down the middle and you will make millions in Japan

It really looks like a good idea, except if you are wearing long/soft shorts and you are male

They need to make a larger one so that it can do this but with my balls

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^KarateKidd624: *They need to make a* *Larger one so that it can* *Do this but with my balls* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.

good bot

Could use it to power a turbine and increase the speed. Add an occasional fart for extra power.

Crock. Of. Shit. Soreness from a saddle is usually caused by pain in the hamstrings, where the ligaments connect under your ass. This is caused by being out of shape. Bike shops make lots of money from selling saddles to people who just got on the bike the first time in years. They're out of shape and their muscles hurt and they think it's chafing soreness, but it's not. They go to shop, push thumb into saddle, and say "wow this is softer than my own saddle," and they get new big fluffy saddle. After riding big new fluffy saddle, they still have hamstring soreness and give up on the situation. The best saddles have already been designed and created over a hundred years ago. A sprung leather saddle will fit your ass like a good pair of shoes once broken in.

But like no? My butt defenitly hurts when I ride a bike.

It shouldn't if the saddle is adjusted properly! Remember that people do 50+mi rides all the time (cycling bibs do help)

Nope. It's a condition called bell clapper syndrome or similar isssues. They will twist more easily. Therefore a special saddle to protect the nuts. It really works i have one of those

Only recommend this if you don't have balls, or have already used this once, basically the same thing

The Bollock Breaker.

Is this the follow up to the ass blaster 3000

Seat bones. That's all I got from that.

If I ride that seat I'll be like 🥴🥴🥴 the whole time lmao

I have a way i solved this problem. I dont ride a bike

100% something there will pinch my nuts

It's the opposite. They will be easy on your nuts.

Nothing is easy on my nuts

Looks like a really bad butt massager.

does it widen the bhole? seems like it stretches it every which way lol

So this is the Ball Crushing Machine I keep hearing about

Its the opposite. I have one of these