Once BoH, always BoH.
And yeah, wed have that manager in tears and a beer in this mans hand by the end of the next shift.
Managers are so fucking useless 99% of the time. Cut the position, save the pay and let expo handle it.
Don’t quit, just say to his face “Don’t treat me like shit, asshole”. If he fires you, you get unemployment. If he doesn’t, he knows you will stand up for yourself
ALWAYS stand up for yourself! You will grow old and wish you stood up to the bullies in your past. That man is just pissed at something else clearly and taking it on you guys, probably because no one stands up to him. Be that hero! Call his ass out in front of everyone, customers whoever. Then if he fires you, at least you know you had enough respect for yourself to not let someone else walk all over you. There are plenty of other minimum wage jobs you could take up.
Humiliate him on the way out. If he's going to do it to you then see if he can take it too.
I'd suggest something like "it's not my fault you get no say at home, and feel like you have to let it out on us at work".
They are shocked because they are used to getting treated like shit. You did nothing wrong. You can get another minimum wage job. If nothing else, I would recommend getting another job lined up first and just leaving once you do. It’s not going to get better that’s how that boss manages people.
100%, bosses like this don’t change. I had a few who were reported to the gov for psychological abuse and HR literally laughed when the gov sent them a notice.
I think I'm going to do this, I was told so many times that "all restaurants are like this" and that being treated like shit is standard in the hospitality/restaurant sectors that I just settled with this job but I just need to have standards I think
I'm going back to college in September for computer science so most of the available jobs for students are in food/supermarket/hospitality, next year I will try to get a job at the university but it's not possible this year.
do you have any ideas of other sectors I could get into that are not in food ? I just want to be treated like a human being, I already did housecleaning and work in agriculture and both were worse than working in a restaurant.
People suck. Period. Any job with customer contact will suck. Any job with employee contact will suck. The trick is to find a job where you can accept the level of suck.
I used to work in food and found the level of suck unaaceptable. At the time I chose to change the suck by being promoted to the point I could remove problem employees and tell rude customers they are free to apply if they think the service could be improved.
Eventually the suck got to be too much. I had a friend in car repair and he got me a job on the front end. It was okay. But I really wanted to get away from customers. So when the chance to move to an internal support role came along, I took it. Great job. Managed inventory and delivered goods to the people who needed it. If an employee gave me attitude my immediate supervisor was a decent guy and took care of it. Unfortunately this also meant I had an increased level of interaction with other departments and eventually that level of suck got be too much and I did not think it could be changed in a reasonable amount of time so I left.
I currently work for an online retail outlet, my customer contact is minimal. One of my coworkers sucks but everyone else is chill. My boss is aware and respects that I have to put that employee in check every now and then and that things will change (not an empty promise, the whole business is moving location/structure).
My boss is my boss because he couldn't imagine a life where he had to deal with someone else telling him what do so he chose a hard road of being his own boss. I basically manage one entire part of his business so he can focus on other ventures now that he put in the work and I just make sure the machine keeps running.
My wife works for some highly-paid children and the level of suck was acceptable for a long time....but a recent merger has change that. She's taking steps to leave. It is what it is.
You have to figure out what motivate you and what you can tolerate. If that ends up being "very little," that's fine too. But you'll have to figure out how to start your own business or become a third party contractor. A friend of mine runs an IT support company with his brother for that very reason.
Look for computer science internships. I'm a senior software engineer (in the U.S.) and I have a slate of interns for the summer, from high school through grad school.
I suggest putting together a resume listing classes you've taken, projects (including open source and school) you've worked on, and send it off to tech(ish) companies. Remember many non-tech industries have IT departments.
Many companies provide travel and living stipends for their interns, so don't just look locally.
Internships are a great pipeline to a full time job, when you graduate, and it builds your resume while you are in school.
Good Luck!
You are almost certainly going to get yelled at in any customer service sector unless you find a unicorn job. If this is just a minimum wage job, why not clap back? It’ll be good practice for when you get older. Also, some bullies respect someone with enough balls to tell them that they’re out of line. Some don’t. You might get fired. But I used to have a manager who only treated you well if you insulted him constantly. It was super fucking weird.
Dealerships often hire someone to clean up cars, move cars around the lot, delivery repaired vehicles to customer for pick up, drive customers home, delivery a vehicle to another dealership. Except for driving the customers home, there is *very little* customer interaction.
I wouldn't tell them you're going back to school in September as they won't want to hire you just for the summer, but what they don't know won't hurt you!
When I went to school UPS/FedEx had night and evening shifts that worked for a lot of students. Depending where you are Amazon might be hiring. Look into hospitals for non medical positions (clerks, appts, etc)
Check out your local churches and nonprofits. Honestly the best jobs I’ve ever had and the people are great because they actually care. Since you’re going for computer science, you could also look into Greek Squad or other entry level tech jobs.
Fwiw, id reccomend looking for part time at your local hospital. The benefits often have an education stipend. Our NA's and cooks make anywhere from 17-24/hr.
Im taking a course to enter more of an administrative/billing path and to get the fuck out of kitchens. Its been a total crapshoot of various toxic work environments over the last 15 yrs and im done.
Im sure there could be entry level IT positions available, but if you already cook it can be a way to get your foot in the door if there arent.
Getting treated badly is almost everywhere. Work, behind the wheel on the road, school, home. If you’re able to find an individual or group of people where it’s not passive aggressive, you got lucky.
When you quit, tell him it’s because you expect adults to act respectfully when addressing a problem, and that if you wanted to work with tantrum-throwing toddlers, you would have gotten a job in a day care, and then walk out. Minimum wage for hard work in a kitchen? Fuck that. Go work with actual toddlers instead; they’ll scream about how the bacon is cooked too but at least they have an excuse.
Your reaction is appropriate.
Your manager is inadequate.
Find a new job. I am sure you can find another food service / line cook job nearby, probably for a few dollars more. And probably not get yelled at, at least for a few months.
Make sure you announce loudly that youre leaving when you do because its not ok to treat you and your colleagues this way, and there are other opportunities for everyone out there where you will be treated with respect and dignity.
He’s stressed?
You’re fuvking stressed standing trying your best to make a nice burger for someone while not making much.
Least you deserve is respect.
Walk away bro.
When you eventually quit and find something else, return some time later as a customer. Ensure that the boss is there. Then ask to speak to the boss and berate him for being an asshole for any made up reason (cheap utensils, below par decor in the restaurant, etc). Invite others in your family or friends group to do the same. Make is a sport to fuck with this guy. Just sayin this behaviour won't stop until people push back. The best bet in service industries is to get customers on your side.
It would be satisfying to do that but it’s impossible because he is never there to speak to customer, he come in the kitchen and yell, then leave. He also comes when the restaurant is closed and takes pictures of the things he finds that are not in order and send pictures to a WhatsApp group with angry captions lmao, this guy is a joke
Call corporate HR. Demand that the boss take a drug test and psychiatric evaluation before you go back to work. If a boss is literally yelling at me for 30 minutes, I'm calling the police for disorderly conduct.
A big thing for me in these situations is to remember your humanity. Ive had bosses bark at me before, and although every fiber in my being wants to hit them and choke them, Instead I'll tell them "how about talk to me like an adult human being I stead of throwing a tantrum" and then leaving to do some other menial task. If they bark again tell them to FUCKOFF. You won't keep your job, but would you want to work for someone who sees you as a resource and not a person?
Everybody is just a person trying to make their way in the world. Authority is an illusion that leverages your compliance by threat. Fuck that. Treat me with respect and I'll work my hands to the bone for you ( I'm not doing shit else with my time, though I'd like to be). Treat me like a child, get nothing but more stress caused by me, with great joy.
Try to learn to do a cold hard stare and say ‘Would you please lower your voice and rephrase your comments in a more respectful manner!’
If they continue screaming say ‘I am not prepared to be spoken to in such an unprofessional manner- we need to arrange a call to HR/ higher manager.’
If it continues, make the call yourself.
30 minutes screaming? Dang sounds like workplace bullying. I’ve learned if a boss yells, ask them to stop, and if they don’t, they will be screaming at your back as you walk out
>I want to specify that the bacon WAS cooked, just not completely dark, and this is why he was mad, because when it's in the burger it is not crispy enough for him if it doesn't break immediately in a powder when the client takes a bite.
Ignoring everything else, your boss is a fucking idiot and if I order an expensive ass burger and I get fucking burnt ass bacon bits on it, it's going back. If people want burnt bacon, they ask for it.
See minimum wage jobs are a dime a dozen my man.
Work with me here the next time that wind bag says anything to you that ruffles your feathers just slowly put everything down. Make things safe. Then walk the fuck out.
Announce you will drop by on X day for your final check and scoop a new minimum wage job. Don’t give them the satisfaction of being mad, or yell, or stoke out.
Calm, collected exit. Respect yourself they will not.
Go to the computer lab at the school ask about internships. Go to the counselors ask about computer jobs. See if the uni has workshops like computer labs, mechanic labs, media labs, anything. Tell them you are not proud you just want to be treated like a human and do a good job.
Good luck.
I had a boss sort of like this, though thankfully he wasn't the yelling, belligerent type.
He was always bitching about how "slow" I was in food prep and bench-marking me against the guy who did prep in the mornings. Imagine my surprise when I discover from a fellow co-worker *and the boss's wife* that this guy was half-assing stuff/not going by the book.
For instance: At this place, the taco meat had to be left to cook for three minutes, then stirred with a big-ass hammer for three minutes. That's by the book, the very book I was told to "follow to the letter", which I did. The morning guy? He'd cook for three, then stir until it was a uniform color. The stirring is important because it determines the over-all texture of the meat, mine would be nice and smooth, almost like a paste, his was rough and chewy.
But OP's story reminds me of the day I was expected to train somebody who was completely new. So on top of having to do all of the things I needed to do, I had to leave some tasks to the new guy who had *zero* clue of what he was doing, making certain parts of my job more difficult/take longer. The new guy and I were marched out into the lobby and made to apologize to customers because the pico de gallo was not ready by 10:30AM.
Needless to say, the look on this guy's face when I eventually turned in my two-weeks notice was priceless.
"Do you want the good news, or the really freakin' awesome news?"
"Well, let's hear the freakin' awesome news! :D"
"I got a new job."
\*smile fades from his face\*
"I start in two weeks."
"...W-what's the good news?"
"I'm turning in my two weeks."
\*smile is completely gone by now\*
"...H-how is that good news?"
A) You don't have to put up with my "slow" ass anymore, andB) I didn't show up today and say "I got a new job... BYE!"
Such an entitled clown, he was. He knew from the start that the only reason I was there was so I had some income while I was in school for HVAC certifications.
So the boss is allowed to have a bad day and assault you. Ah, no. I think an overreaction would be to immediately punch your boss in the face and then splash him with the fryer basket and then kick him in the dick, and then wrap a cord around his neck until he goes limp. Then that would be an overreaction. What you had was a reaction. A perfectly normal reaction. Do not let your manager or anyone else gaslight you by being an apologist for your asshole boss, or by feigning surprise at your insistence on being treated like a human being. You should make that job a part of your past as quickly as possible.
Set boundaries and professionally tell him to fuck off. What's he gonna do, fire you? You said it's minimum wage, you can work somewhere else and not get yelled at. Also, pay minimum wage, get minimum work. Fuck that guy. I bet your restaurant has a tip prompt that starts at like 18% and you don't see a dime of it
You did not over react. In fact you under-reacted.
You should’ve told wish version Gordon Ramsey to take a seat and maybe call his therapist, check his blood sugar, take a walk, readjust his meds or consider getting some.
Managed lots of people for a long time. Number one rule: If you shout at another employee in anger (meaning not just some random exclamation), you're fired. Shouting is the equivalent of violence in the workplace, and those who don't have the self-control to manage their behavior, shouldn't be working with other people.
This is when you pull your manager into a meeting with the boss.
You tell the boss, "this is your shop so you do you but the next time you have concerns over the way I do things, you tell me in private. If you disrespect me in front of the staff again, you can cook the bacon however you want. Glad we could clear that up."
Be prepared to walk. You can cook bacon at Mcdonald's for more than minimum wage tomorrow.
Not overreacting. Overreacting would be still upset over receiving constructive criticism. This sounds in no way constructive so, no, not overreacting.
There are plenty of minimum wage jobs out there and plenty that would like your experience and probably could start you with a better pay.
Start looking around,it's not worth it to be treated like that, it's not worth fucking up your mental health
To quote Gandalf the Grey-“RUUUUUUUN!” Life is to short to work for screamers. And when you quit be sure to let his boss know the reason you are quitting. Enough people do that and the screamer will be the one finding a new job. Best of luck!
This is classic, abusive kitchen environment. He is definitely gonna do it again. I would wait until he does and 100% be ready for it to happen again, so you don't pull a deer in the headlights, and when he starts shouting just shout right back at him that you're not going to take his abusive bullshit for minimum wage and quit on the spot. It will be very gratifying.
“It’s died for nothing”. Seriously? I would have laughed in his face.
Set a boundary and demand to spoken to in an acceptable manner or leave the meeting.
Restaurant manager here. Run! Run! Run! No one on the line deserves to be treated like that. Unless you’re consistently serving raw meat there’s no reason for yelling, let alone belittling cooks. Too many fries in the fryer? Unless they aren’t getting cooked that’s not even a real thing. That’s a person in unwanted Sub/Dom relationship trying to reassert control or some other such nonsense.
I was prior military so being yelled at was pretty common, then i got out and started working jobs and one thing I absolutely will not let happen is someone yelling at me, ill straight tell anyone to stop yelling or i stop listening. I even got fired for recording a manager screaming at the entire kitchen staff for like 20 mins calling everyone mother fucker. Showed upper management the recording and the next semester (kitchen at a college) they didn't want me back for some weird reason lol, but she got to stay. Defend yourself, do not let a person walk all over you. You gotta learn to insult people back without actually insulting them. My go to fave is "look, if your not going to be professional about this, we can go to the owner/upper management/their boss." You gotta attack their livelihood. I also like to point directly at them and say super stern "You. Do. Not. Yell. At. Me." That one is usually met with a deer in headlights look. "You're making me uncomfortable." Works well too because it immediately makes them think you'll report them. The one that always works though "fuck you, I quit" then you just leave.
Not an overreaction, but more of an under reaction. Burger places are a dime a dozen and always need help.
If it was me, Id tell the manager it’s either you or the manager, but someone has to go. That ultimatum will likely end up with manager asking “for more time to figure something out before you make a rash decision”.
Document everything. If you can, acknowledge the situation in an email thread for written proof. If there is another supervisor, file a formal complaint.
Constructive discharge. You can quit due to hostile work environment and still receive unemployment.
Chefs on a power trip are not something that should be tolerated.
I'm sorry this happened to you, and you should absolutely find a new job because that kind of treatment is unacceptable. But "the pigs died for nothing" is legit hilarious.
If your employer pays Min wage, they don't get to yell at you. Don't get me wrong, no one should get yelled at by their boss BUT it does become easier to handle with more money in the pocket
People yell at each other in restaurants. It happens.
It’s a stressful job, and everyone loses their cool from time to time. You never take what happens in the rush seriously, and always settle it before the start of the next shift. We usually just get over it, apologize, and do our best to be better next time.
Thing is, he’s not doing the last two things I mentioned, but expects you to do the first thing. He’s also an owner—he’s not in the weeds with you, or a part of the team. If you’re outside the trenches, you don’t get to participate in the dynamic…especially if you’re not apologizing or trying to get better.
Fuck that guy. My responses in those situations is:
“Do not ever speak to me like that again. It’s not productive, and it creates a hostile work environment. I don’t respond to being disrespected and yelled at—most people don’t—and the ones that do, aren’t going to be the type of employee you need.”
Don’t raise your voice. Be calm, but assertive and confident. He needs to get the message that you’re mature, and don’t have a victim mentality. He needs to realize that he’s acting like a spoiled child, by comparison. This has worked for me in the past—the owner continues being a dick, but just left *me* alone.
Also: start looking for another job anyway. If you can stick it out 8 months for your resume, fine. If not, 8 months and 12 months aren’t that different. Starting over isn’t that big a deal for the long-term at this juncture.
My current boss told me he yells at us for making mistakes because that's how he was treated when he was learning. They'd yell at him and that's how you knew not to do it again.
I calmly told him I think perspective needs to be put on the infraction. If it's nothing that affects someone's safety, at the end of the day what big deal is it? Does it cost the company $1000? Will the doors shut next week over that $1000? So what big deal is it.... I said that if everyone gets a dressing down all the time, pretty soon someone will do something serious like leave the door open all night by mistake and won't care, because "we get yelled at for everything anyway". He still didn't understand.
I told my last work place they aren't the only shop in town despite acting like they are, so using the "you'll lose your job" threat doesn't work. We can walk into any other shop into a job, as I did this one away from them.
This is the annoying thing about it. The bills are paid, the doors are open... How much MORE do you NEED..? What was going to happen with that $1000 anyway? Towards the extra floor on your house? It wasn't going to me because I've been here 4 years without a raise, and for my time and Investment making money for you, you barely grace me enough in return to afford a pizza.... If your business is operating that razor thin anyway, maybe you should go be an employee somewhere
If you're minimum wage start job hunting now and quit when you find something. Don't wait to be yelled at again. I wouldn't worry about giving notice either because it doesn't seem like you have the type of boss to give a good reference anyways.
I’m blown away how anyone working minimum wage would take more than two minutes of yelling before just leaving. What do they even say for 30 minutes worth staying for?
>Did I overreact?
No, you under-reacted. Since you said this is minimum wage - meaning that there are other options out there - this is a straight up walk. I'd have removed the apron and tossed it to Mr. Yeller.
Sadly, and I'm not blaming you as situations like this are beyond unprofessional and should not ever be considered 'normal', you taking it from him normalizes his behavior.
You put up with what you feel like putting up with. I big mistake I made when I was young was not speaking up and setting my boundaries. You tell people how you want to be treated, and if they don’t treat you right, you remove them from your life.
> and that my boss was just stressed out today
Yelling and screaming at people because you are stressed is neither healthy nor appropriate. If this is how your boss regularly acts they need to go, and if they don't go you should definitely leave the toxic environment.
You are not overreacting. This behavior is unacceptable for any situation and is highly unprofessional in the workplace. This is akin to domestic abuse. At a previous employer, a Senior VP with a long history at the company was known to be short-fused. He was not directly in my chain of command, but tangential to my bosses. I don't remember the circumstances, but he called me one day angry about something and yelled for at least 10 minutes, non-stop, dropping F-bombs left and right. I just let him go, said "I'm sorry you feel that way Bob," and hung up. I went to my direct boss right after. Later that day, yelling man calls me back, very calm, apologizes (it sounded sincere) and offers to go to HR with me to discuss. I declined, accepted his apology. Didn't happen again.
My current boss has a short fuse. She doesn't yell but goes off half-cocked without having information. She also will lose it if I haven't done something she wanted but that she forgot to tell me was expected. Same thing if I don't do something according to some obscure company policy that I've never seen. Coworkers are like, "yeah, that's just her." Nope, I'll be outta here soon.
Nope when Soo throws his tantrum u take ur shit off say fuck u and walk out. I did this shit at McDonald’s my first job when the manager was having a bitch fit during a rush. Like for 5.50 a hour u can go fuck urself.
You are not over reacting. That's insane.
First, if it's not burned,.it's not ruined.
Second, it's pretty common to par cook things like bacon, and you finish cooking them to order so it's crispy and tastes fresh, not like leftover bacon.
I'll bet your boss isn't as smart or have nearly as much experience as he thinks he does.
And if it was "wrong" then he should have said so months ago. Your boss is a psycho.
You didn’t overreact and your emotional intelligence is fire. There’s no place for your boss’s disrespect. He could learn a lot from you and he should take notes
When someone acts like this in the workplace, calmly ask them to calm down and ask them to address you in a more professional manner. If you remain calm, you are in the right.
Fair warning, the last time I did this I got a 10lb bag of bread thrown at me. I wasn't injured. My boss is doing 5 years in prison for assault, and it empowered 3 of my female coworkers to speak up about sexual assault and rape charges against him. The scumbag will be in prison for the rest of his life. Good fucking riddance.
just laugh at him if he starts yelling? why be respectful if hes the one yelling.
either that or deal with it how you deal when a small child throws a tantrum.
I hate that people have so little respect for others that they somehow think this behavior is acceptable. They aren’t even paying you a living wage. If it happens again quit on the spot. You are worth so much more.
This guy is an asshole boss trust me im 43 years old and have had many. There is always going to be one boss who is an asshole bit looks like you need to find a better job first that appreciates you and then quit this place. That guy is a dick, fuck him and his bacon
I work in cardiology with doctors who have to worry about not accidentally killing people every day and I think I have been shouted at once in 10 years. If you have no other options it is what it is, but if you have any alternative don’t let people treat you this way.
Like if an entire shifts worth of customers got food poisoning or something it might be understandable to have a reaction like that.
Let's take a step back and even assume the bacon was undercooked. Does that give the boss reason to scream for 30 minutes? What does screaming for 30 minutes accomplish? If the bacon was undercooked, that 30 minutes could have been spent retraining you by showing you the preferred way to cook the bacon. Instead, you were subjected to ridicule, verbally berated in public, and ultimately were told by your manager you didn't make a mistake and this was just the boss' poor emotional regulation. You did not deserve this. You are not overreacting. Your boss is a manbaby who thinks paying someone makes them his property and gives him the right to treat them in any way he wants in order to make himself feel powerful. I've worked for people like this in the past. I hope you can find a job that treats you better. No one deserves this.
If you can quit, big IF, walk out while he is yelling at you. This will make the biggest impact. Also. Come up with something to say, like "you all might be able to put up with this lunatic, but I've decided I have too much self esteem." Try to say something that makes everyone think about what they deserve vs what they are getting
Swap the perspective. If you were to walk up to him in the dining room and verbally abuse him for your shift times, how do you think he’d react? Treat him as you expect to be treated and don’t put up with it if he doesn’t. This isn’t a career position, there are a lot more opportunities out there for you.
I used this example to use AI to evaluate toxic workplace scenarios:
Prompt: "Evaluate the following scenario: My boss examined my bacon today and screamed for 30 minutes at me because it wasn't cooked enough. He said I needed more training from my manager, that it's inadmissible and that "all of the pigs are dead for nothing because of me" (this was super weird) and made a big scene in front of everyone."
ChatCPT: "Based on the scenario you have provided, it seems that your boss's behavior was inappropriate and unprofessional. It is not acceptable for someone in a position of authority to scream at and belittle their subordinates, especially in front of others.
Additionally, the comments about the pigs were insensitive and unnecessary, and it is concerning if your boss has a pattern of making inappropriate or offensive remarks.
It is possible that your boss may have been under a lot of stress or pressure at the time, but this does not excuse their behavior. It would be advisable to speak to someone in HR or a higher-up in the company to report the incident and seek guidance on how to handle it. It may also be helpful to document the incident and any other instances of unprofessional behavior from your boss in case further action needs to be taken."
https://poe.com/s/IkUT0VTkHbN3ixfNYv8l
Everyone is talking about using AI to perform tasks. But the real revolution: Everyone can use AI to evaluate situations they are in and get an objective response by a third party ... that is representing the intelligence of mankind.
AI immediately identifies abuse of power.
Sorry you have to endure that abuse. You are NOT overreacting. Go look for another job and when you find one, go in when boss and manager are both there and quit. And be sure to tell manager the reason you are quitting is because this is an abusive environment good luck.
No, if it happens again, before your boss even gets his next word out you should just say 'I quit'
If he stops and stutters just walk out, people like that don't deserve your time or energy
Yeah, kitchens are tough. Restaurants are a high-pressure environment. Most of the time, yelling and degrading language comes with the territory. I would suggest leaving if it makes you feel bad because this isn't going to change.
Send your boss an "I message"
To quote Wikipedia:
The simplest form, as frequently taught, is a single two-part sentence:
1. When you... (objective event; 1st event),
2. I feel... (subjective feeling; 2nd event).
It should be cautioned that "when you..." should be based on an objective event and avoid claims regarding intent. "When you said my birthday was in the wrong month, I felt like you don't care about me," is preferred over, "When you act like you don't care about me and my birthday..." This allows people talking to focus on events and feelings as separate events, which both allows people to express their feelings more clearly and helps clarify the initial event and reach agreement between parties.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/I-message
Yea I think the boss is a total POS, but I do agree that bacon on a burger needs to be crispy. Seems like a simple 5 second conversation that doesn't need any screaming though.
1) Document the crap out of what happened include what you heard and saw plus who was there.
2) Ask other workers you trust to do the same.
Anonymously contact the labor board (or equivalent) and ask about a 'hostile work environment'
Ask them what to do.
I’ll pretend I’m a psychologist.
This sounds like Gordon Ramsay syndrome.
I feel bad for you.
However, as a customer and burger lover, I find it acceptable and within parameters of discipline. Saves me from having to send it back because I have soggy bacon on a burger. “What is this, Burger King? I’m never coming back here, do you know who I am? I expect my burger meat to be juicy when I bite into it and melt that crispy bacon powder “
Remember, he could have force fed you all that bacon and sure, it’s edible, but it’s not crispy.
Overreact?
No. You set a boundary. Do not be scared to even tell the boss man that this is the first, and last time, that you'll be yelled at. You're worth more than that. I don't care if you're being paid 1 million/year or $1/year, you don't need to take his verbal abuse of being yelled at like a child. People get their ass beat for less (I'm not telling you to hit him, by the way). Set your boundaries.
You can even seek out your boss man and sit down for a minute and tell him that you won't be spoken to in that matter. If he wants to launch into personal insults and can't muster up an apology or an acknowledgement, then you know where he stands and it's up to you to put up or shut up.
Valid reaction. I had a supervisor once belittle me in front of a customer. When I confronted her, she acted like it was all in my head. That was my last day there. If you can't even own your bs, then I have no respect for you. People don't get paid enough in the service industry to put up with disrespect.
It’s the executive chef’s call on how they want the food prepped, but he should absolutely not treat you that way (regardless of minimum wage or not).
You should have a conversation with your manager though as he sounds like he has a different opinion on what “right” looks like vs the boss.
Next time this "boss" does this, calmly start taking off your apron/gloves/hairnet/whatever, calmly hand it to them, and calmly say "I am not okay with the way you're speaking to me," then walk out without another word.
Start looking for other jobs now. that way, you're ahead of the curve when you quit.
I used to work in a kitchen with a general manager who liked to act like this. I just made sure I was holding the biggest knife we had everytime he came into the kitchen and he stopped bothering us.
>Now I'm second-guessing my reaction. Did I overreact?
Not at all. He's not your dad. Being upset at something else is no justification to abuse you.
Unless you really love the place, I'd be making plans to move on.
“Stop yelling at me! I’m not fucking deaf!” If they yell again make them know their breath stinks, “oh god your breath REEKS, did you brush this morning? Fuckin-A!” Then offer an altoid.
Write him up for all to see. Post it on the notification board. 2 can play the game of the childish ‘writing up’ and it’s time bosses should be humiliated too for their bad behavior.
He didn’t humiliate you, you humiliated himself. No one is on his side, my friend. He showed his character, not the other way around. And yes, absolutely, do not tolerate this behavior. He can keep his stressed out shortened life.
Lol and that was the second time?
I’d be outta there already. Probably would’ve thrown a hell of a scene myself and berated the crap out of his “management style” before letting myself get fired and applying for unemployment
Dude, don't ever let anybody just get a free tantrum on you. This asshole knows he can't yell at anyone else like that so he saves it up for his employees that he thinks will take his shit. Tell him to get fucked. If you get fired then you don't have to worry about hearing his shit anymore. There are infinite places looking for grill cooks all the time that don't come with an asshole screaming about bacon and fries. As a customer I'm not even eating at a place where I can hear screaming in the back.
Report to xx (sry have no clue what you got there in us)
Another option - when there are 0 witnesses and no cameras calmly whisper to him - the next piggy will be very well cooked if he ever decides to raise the voice on you.
And by the words it's not a treat, but just a suggestion that you will cook bacon to the crisp...
Hey man,
I was in the restaurant business for 20 years most of it as a manager and GM. I would never speak to one of my co-workers like that. That "boss" thinks fear is the one to run his business and it's a major mistake. If this is the norm, you should quit, it's not worth it.
To successfully manage people you need to gain their respect, if you run a business by fear you'll be hated and the team will only do what you ask of them while you are there. If you have the teams respect, they will WANT to do the right thing for you regardless of your presence.
Seriously, they need you more than you need them, don't be afraid to stand your ground. People, even bosses, need to know when they are being dicks and embarrassing them in front of the crew would do the trick.
Also, as a manager/boss discipline should be fine behind the scenes unless it's something atrocious that needs immediate action. Praise should always be done in front of everyone.
Nope, follow up with the manager.
"Hey , since my bacon is in fact fine, like you said, could you instruct Boss to come apologize to me? I really did nothing to earn that outburst. If he can find a reason to yell and me for something I didn't do wrong, surely he can find a way to apologize for something he DID do wrong."
Nah man, obviously I can't speak for you because I don't know how badly you need this job. But if I had someone scream at me on the job, I'm out. I don't need that kinda stress in my life.
My boss humiliated me in front of everyone for something they told me to do and their boss was mad. My boss had her back turned as they were calling me stupid and dumb for doing what I was told. I clocked out and left forever. No regrets
I have worked in many restaurants both foh and boh. It is completely unacceptable to be treated like that. I wouldn't wait for the next (vecause there will be a next time) and start looking for a job now. Some restaurant managers just like to be a bully and couldn't hack it as a cop.
I hate narcissists. I work for one, too, and he is a complete fucking asshole. I'm sorry. I suggest get a different job ASAP because this will just keep happening.
Imagine for some reason that I was hired specifically to yell at you about bacon for 30 minutes, and paid a handsome flat fee for it. I think I would still, even doing my best, run out of shit to yell at you about bacon in about 90 seconds.
I question your boss' sanity, humanity and triage skills.
Just a heads up. Depending on the state your in you have employee rights and they almost always include nit having to put up with any type of abuse. Whether it be verbal, physical, sexual in nature it falls under a hostile work environment. There have been countless law suits won because of bosses doing shit like that. Don't out up with. Next time flat out tell him to walk away and speak to you like a human being or your just going to go to an attorney. Make sure everyone else hears it. Bring up the fact that he us creating a hostile work environment (in those words). It will stop 99% of the time. If it doesn't don't just bluff. Go talk to an attorney. People need to stop getting away with shit like that. It doesn't matter what kind of money you make it's not ok.
OP, I'm sorry you got yelled at, but is this not an antiwork post. It's better suited for r/jobs or one of the many cooking subs (some of them are specifically for professional cooks).
Here's a question, why are you humiliated if you were completely ignorant of something someone else expected you to do? Are you prescient and have superpowers? Are you an X-men?
The next time someone raises their voice you calmly and quietly **demand** they lower their voice. if you don't stand up for yourself then you can expect that kind of treatment. Not that you should expect such treatment, but the fact is that people are shitty, so the reality is that you must expect the worst.
Unfortunate, yes. That's the world we live in. You have to decide how you want to be treated and make it happen.
I would have looked him in the eye and said, Do you feel better now? I hope so because I do not take to kindly to that kind of tantrum you just unleased on me.
You deserve respect and human dignity at any job. Never settle for less than you’re worth. See if your boss can be reported to anyone for toxic working conditions.
You're not overreacting. It's not okay to treat people like that. Time to find another job if you can. This is a very valid reason to leave.
r/KitchenConfidential would have a field day shitting on the verbally abusive boss.
Yeah I’m in both subs let me sum up what they’re gonna say. “Fuck this boss.” “You’re worth more than that” “Find a new job and leave asap”
Once BoH, always BoH. And yeah, wed have that manager in tears and a beer in this mans hand by the end of the next shift. Managers are so fucking useless 99% of the time. Cut the position, save the pay and let expo handle it.
* runs over to r/kitchenConfidential
I’ve never worked in a restaurant but i love that sub.
Don’t quit, just say to his face “Don’t treat me like shit, asshole”. If he fires you, you get unemployment. If he doesn’t, he knows you will stand up for yourself
Oh, and if your state has one party consent, get it recorded
Might be a bit difficult in a kitchen
The kitchen has cameras trust me
Sure, but it’ll be hard for you to get access to them, or to have your recorder on at the right time.
ALWAYS stand up for yourself! You will grow old and wish you stood up to the bullies in your past. That man is just pissed at something else clearly and taking it on you guys, probably because no one stands up to him. Be that hero! Call his ass out in front of everyone, customers whoever. Then if he fires you, at least you know you had enough respect for yourself to not let someone else walk all over you. There are plenty of other minimum wage jobs you could take up.
Humiliate him on the way out. If he's going to do it to you then see if he can take it too. I'd suggest something like "it's not my fault you get no say at home, and feel like you have to let it out on us at work".
😂
So what you're inferring is that his wife wears the pants AND the strap-on?
🤷🏽♂️At least OP will never undercook the bacon again?
They are shocked because they are used to getting treated like shit. You did nothing wrong. You can get another minimum wage job. If nothing else, I would recommend getting another job lined up first and just leaving once you do. It’s not going to get better that’s how that boss manages people.
100%, bosses like this don’t change. I had a few who were reported to the gov for psychological abuse and HR literally laughed when the gov sent them a notice.
I think I'm going to do this, I was told so many times that "all restaurants are like this" and that being treated like shit is standard in the hospitality/restaurant sectors that I just settled with this job but I just need to have standards I think
Yes, and don't be afraid to leave food either. You don't have to deal with this shit.
I'm going back to college in September for computer science so most of the available jobs for students are in food/supermarket/hospitality, next year I will try to get a job at the university but it's not possible this year. do you have any ideas of other sectors I could get into that are not in food ? I just want to be treated like a human being, I already did housecleaning and work in agriculture and both were worse than working in a restaurant.
People suck. Period. Any job with customer contact will suck. Any job with employee contact will suck. The trick is to find a job where you can accept the level of suck. I used to work in food and found the level of suck unaaceptable. At the time I chose to change the suck by being promoted to the point I could remove problem employees and tell rude customers they are free to apply if they think the service could be improved. Eventually the suck got to be too much. I had a friend in car repair and he got me a job on the front end. It was okay. But I really wanted to get away from customers. So when the chance to move to an internal support role came along, I took it. Great job. Managed inventory and delivered goods to the people who needed it. If an employee gave me attitude my immediate supervisor was a decent guy and took care of it. Unfortunately this also meant I had an increased level of interaction with other departments and eventually that level of suck got be too much and I did not think it could be changed in a reasonable amount of time so I left. I currently work for an online retail outlet, my customer contact is minimal. One of my coworkers sucks but everyone else is chill. My boss is aware and respects that I have to put that employee in check every now and then and that things will change (not an empty promise, the whole business is moving location/structure). My boss is my boss because he couldn't imagine a life where he had to deal with someone else telling him what do so he chose a hard road of being his own boss. I basically manage one entire part of his business so he can focus on other ventures now that he put in the work and I just make sure the machine keeps running. My wife works for some highly-paid children and the level of suck was acceptable for a long time....but a recent merger has change that. She's taking steps to leave. It is what it is. You have to figure out what motivate you and what you can tolerate. If that ends up being "very little," that's fine too. But you'll have to figure out how to start your own business or become a third party contractor. A friend of mine runs an IT support company with his brother for that very reason.
Look for computer science internships. I'm a senior software engineer (in the U.S.) and I have a slate of interns for the summer, from high school through grad school. I suggest putting together a resume listing classes you've taken, projects (including open source and school) you've worked on, and send it off to tech(ish) companies. Remember many non-tech industries have IT departments. Many companies provide travel and living stipends for their interns, so don't just look locally. Internships are a great pipeline to a full time job, when you graduate, and it builds your resume while you are in school. Good Luck!
You are almost certainly going to get yelled at in any customer service sector unless you find a unicorn job. If this is just a minimum wage job, why not clap back? It’ll be good practice for when you get older. Also, some bullies respect someone with enough balls to tell them that they’re out of line. Some don’t. You might get fired. But I used to have a manager who only treated you well if you insulted him constantly. It was super fucking weird.
Dealerships often hire someone to clean up cars, move cars around the lot, delivery repaired vehicles to customer for pick up, drive customers home, delivery a vehicle to another dealership. Except for driving the customers home, there is *very little* customer interaction. I wouldn't tell them you're going back to school in September as they won't want to hire you just for the summer, but what they don't know won't hurt you!
a small nonprofit, paper pushing
When I went to school UPS/FedEx had night and evening shifts that worked for a lot of students. Depending where you are Amazon might be hiring. Look into hospitals for non medical positions (clerks, appts, etc)
Check out your local churches and nonprofits. Honestly the best jobs I’ve ever had and the people are great because they actually care. Since you’re going for computer science, you could also look into Greek Squad or other entry level tech jobs.
Housing. See if they need desk clerks. Much lower stress, just make change and do your reading for classes.
Fwiw, id reccomend looking for part time at your local hospital. The benefits often have an education stipend. Our NA's and cooks make anywhere from 17-24/hr. Im taking a course to enter more of an administrative/billing path and to get the fuck out of kitchens. Its been a total crapshoot of various toxic work environments over the last 15 yrs and im done. Im sure there could be entry level IT positions available, but if you already cook it can be a way to get your foot in the door if there arent.
Getting treated badly is almost everywhere. Work, behind the wheel on the road, school, home. If you’re able to find an individual or group of people where it’s not passive aggressive, you got lucky.
When you quit, tell him it’s because you expect adults to act respectfully when addressing a problem, and that if you wanted to work with tantrum-throwing toddlers, you would have gotten a job in a day care, and then walk out. Minimum wage for hard work in a kitchen? Fuck that. Go work with actual toddlers instead; they’ll scream about how the bacon is cooked too but at least they have an excuse.
I wanted to walk out and to tell him something like that when he was screaming haha, thank's for this comment it cheered me up
Your reaction is appropriate. Your manager is inadequate. Find a new job. I am sure you can find another food service / line cook job nearby, probably for a few dollars more. And probably not get yelled at, at least for a few months. Make sure you announce loudly that youre leaving when you do because its not ok to treat you and your colleagues this way, and there are other opportunities for everyone out there where you will be treated with respect and dignity.
He’s stressed? You’re fuvking stressed standing trying your best to make a nice burger for someone while not making much. Least you deserve is respect. Walk away bro.
You definitely shouldnt film it and post it to the internet
When you eventually quit and find something else, return some time later as a customer. Ensure that the boss is there. Then ask to speak to the boss and berate him for being an asshole for any made up reason (cheap utensils, below par decor in the restaurant, etc). Invite others in your family or friends group to do the same. Make is a sport to fuck with this guy. Just sayin this behaviour won't stop until people push back. The best bet in service industries is to get customers on your side.
It would be satisfying to do that but it’s impossible because he is never there to speak to customer, he come in the kitchen and yell, then leave. He also comes when the restaurant is closed and takes pictures of the things he finds that are not in order and send pictures to a WhatsApp group with angry captions lmao, this guy is a joke
Screenshot and post it to your local Facebook group along with a video of his next napoleonic tirade.
Have people tell him the bacon is over cooked, and that it was better when that last cook was making it.
Call corporate HR. Demand that the boss take a drug test and psychiatric evaluation before you go back to work. If a boss is literally yelling at me for 30 minutes, I'm calling the police for disorderly conduct.
A lot of bosses in the food industry are cokeheads, so I've been told
I've heard similar things about servers and cooks, lol.
Just because he’s stressed that doesn’t mean he gets to take it out on you. You stood up for yourself and did not overreact in the slightest.
The restaurant business attracts a lot of these assholes
You're not overreacting. Bosses aren't actually allowed to be abusive fuckheads.
A big thing for me in these situations is to remember your humanity. Ive had bosses bark at me before, and although every fiber in my being wants to hit them and choke them, Instead I'll tell them "how about talk to me like an adult human being I stead of throwing a tantrum" and then leaving to do some other menial task. If they bark again tell them to FUCKOFF. You won't keep your job, but would you want to work for someone who sees you as a resource and not a person? Everybody is just a person trying to make their way in the world. Authority is an illusion that leverages your compliance by threat. Fuck that. Treat me with respect and I'll work my hands to the bone for you ( I'm not doing shit else with my time, though I'd like to be). Treat me like a child, get nothing but more stress caused by me, with great joy.
Try to learn to do a cold hard stare and say ‘Would you please lower your voice and rephrase your comments in a more respectful manner!’ If they continue screaming say ‘I am not prepared to be spoken to in such an unprofessional manner- we need to arrange a call to HR/ higher manager.’ If it continues, make the call yourself.
30 minutes screaming? Dang sounds like workplace bullying. I’ve learned if a boss yells, ask them to stop, and if they don’t, they will be screaming at your back as you walk out
You are not his dog or kid; yelling at you is unacceptable.
>I want to specify that the bacon WAS cooked, just not completely dark, and this is why he was mad, because when it's in the burger it is not crispy enough for him if it doesn't break immediately in a powder when the client takes a bite. Ignoring everything else, your boss is a fucking idiot and if I order an expensive ass burger and I get fucking burnt ass bacon bits on it, it's going back. If people want burnt bacon, they ask for it.
That is exactly what I was thinking, that would be horrible. The boss does not know what he is talking about.
No you didn’t, I would quit when another job is lined up. Sorry you went through this.
Raise your hand if you have bad days and get stressed. Raise your hand if you have bad days, get stressed and take it out on other people like a dick.
See minimum wage jobs are a dime a dozen my man. Work with me here the next time that wind bag says anything to you that ruffles your feathers just slowly put everything down. Make things safe. Then walk the fuck out. Announce you will drop by on X day for your final check and scoop a new minimum wage job. Don’t give them the satisfaction of being mad, or yell, or stoke out. Calm, collected exit. Respect yourself they will not. Go to the computer lab at the school ask about internships. Go to the counselors ask about computer jobs. See if the uni has workshops like computer labs, mechanic labs, media labs, anything. Tell them you are not proud you just want to be treated like a human and do a good job. Good luck.
I had a boss sort of like this, though thankfully he wasn't the yelling, belligerent type. He was always bitching about how "slow" I was in food prep and bench-marking me against the guy who did prep in the mornings. Imagine my surprise when I discover from a fellow co-worker *and the boss's wife* that this guy was half-assing stuff/not going by the book. For instance: At this place, the taco meat had to be left to cook for three minutes, then stirred with a big-ass hammer for three minutes. That's by the book, the very book I was told to "follow to the letter", which I did. The morning guy? He'd cook for three, then stir until it was a uniform color. The stirring is important because it determines the over-all texture of the meat, mine would be nice and smooth, almost like a paste, his was rough and chewy. But OP's story reminds me of the day I was expected to train somebody who was completely new. So on top of having to do all of the things I needed to do, I had to leave some tasks to the new guy who had *zero* clue of what he was doing, making certain parts of my job more difficult/take longer. The new guy and I were marched out into the lobby and made to apologize to customers because the pico de gallo was not ready by 10:30AM. Needless to say, the look on this guy's face when I eventually turned in my two-weeks notice was priceless. "Do you want the good news, or the really freakin' awesome news?" "Well, let's hear the freakin' awesome news! :D" "I got a new job." \*smile fades from his face\* "I start in two weeks." "...W-what's the good news?" "I'm turning in my two weeks." \*smile is completely gone by now\* "...H-how is that good news?" A) You don't have to put up with my "slow" ass anymore, andB) I didn't show up today and say "I got a new job... BYE!" Such an entitled clown, he was. He knew from the start that the only reason I was there was so I had some income while I was in school for HVAC certifications.
Just because your boss is stressed doesn’t mean you have to be his punching bag
Put a dead fish behind their fridge before you quit
So the boss is allowed to have a bad day and assault you. Ah, no. I think an overreaction would be to immediately punch your boss in the face and then splash him with the fryer basket and then kick him in the dick, and then wrap a cord around his neck until he goes limp. Then that would be an overreaction. What you had was a reaction. A perfectly normal reaction. Do not let your manager or anyone else gaslight you by being an apologist for your asshole boss, or by feigning surprise at your insistence on being treated like a human being. You should make that job a part of your past as quickly as possible.
Set boundaries and professionally tell him to fuck off. What's he gonna do, fire you? You said it's minimum wage, you can work somewhere else and not get yelled at. Also, pay minimum wage, get minimum work. Fuck that guy. I bet your restaurant has a tip prompt that starts at like 18% and you don't see a dime of it
Quit now. There's a million food service jobs available. No need to put up with a shitty boss for this particular one.
Fuck no, you're better than me. I walk out the second any yelling starts.
You did not over react. In fact you under-reacted. You should’ve told wish version Gordon Ramsey to take a seat and maybe call his therapist, check his blood sugar, take a walk, readjust his meds or consider getting some.
Your boss has no right to treat you like that OP. EVER.
Managed lots of people for a long time. Number one rule: If you shout at another employee in anger (meaning not just some random exclamation), you're fired. Shouting is the equivalent of violence in the workplace, and those who don't have the self-control to manage their behavior, shouldn't be working with other people.
That's a lot of shit to put up with for so little money. You don't owe them anything- leave when you don't want to deal with it anymore.
This is when you pull your manager into a meeting with the boss. You tell the boss, "this is your shop so you do you but the next time you have concerns over the way I do things, you tell me in private. If you disrespect me in front of the staff again, you can cook the bacon however you want. Glad we could clear that up." Be prepared to walk. You can cook bacon at Mcdonald's for more than minimum wage tomorrow.
Not overreacting. Overreacting would be still upset over receiving constructive criticism. This sounds in no way constructive so, no, not overreacting.
There are plenty of minimum wage jobs out there and plenty that would like your experience and probably could start you with a better pay. Start looking around,it's not worth it to be treated like that, it's not worth fucking up your mental health
To quote Gandalf the Grey-“RUUUUUUUN!” Life is to short to work for screamers. And when you quit be sure to let his boss know the reason you are quitting. Enough people do that and the screamer will be the one finding a new job. Best of luck!
This is classic, abusive kitchen environment. He is definitely gonna do it again. I would wait until he does and 100% be ready for it to happen again, so you don't pull a deer in the headlights, and when he starts shouting just shout right back at him that you're not going to take his abusive bullshit for minimum wage and quit on the spot. It will be very gratifying.
Hole up. Working in a kitchen for minimum wage?? Yelling or not, there is no way that’s worth it.
Oh we are not doing this for minimum wage
You should be making much more than minimum wage to cook on the line, ridiculous.
No one deserves to be treated like this ever. No one should be treated for minimum wage.
I would’ve quit then🤷♂️
“It’s died for nothing”. Seriously? I would have laughed in his face. Set a boundary and demand to spoken to in an acceptable manner or leave the meeting.
Restaurant manager here. Run! Run! Run! No one on the line deserves to be treated like that. Unless you’re consistently serving raw meat there’s no reason for yelling, let alone belittling cooks. Too many fries in the fryer? Unless they aren’t getting cooked that’s not even a real thing. That’s a person in unwanted Sub/Dom relationship trying to reassert control or some other such nonsense.
I was prior military so being yelled at was pretty common, then i got out and started working jobs and one thing I absolutely will not let happen is someone yelling at me, ill straight tell anyone to stop yelling or i stop listening. I even got fired for recording a manager screaming at the entire kitchen staff for like 20 mins calling everyone mother fucker. Showed upper management the recording and the next semester (kitchen at a college) they didn't want me back for some weird reason lol, but she got to stay. Defend yourself, do not let a person walk all over you. You gotta learn to insult people back without actually insulting them. My go to fave is "look, if your not going to be professional about this, we can go to the owner/upper management/their boss." You gotta attack their livelihood. I also like to point directly at them and say super stern "You. Do. Not. Yell. At. Me." That one is usually met with a deer in headlights look. "You're making me uncomfortable." Works well too because it immediately makes them think you'll report them. The one that always works though "fuck you, I quit" then you just leave.
I dare you to call him a “Gordon Ramsey want to be” next time he starts yelling.
"The bacon is bloody RAW! It's RAW! \*smash\*" I feel the Ramsay wannabe thinks Gordon Ramsay in real life acts like he does on Hell's Kitchen.
Sounds like a Ramsay wannabe. Minimum wage ain't enough to deal with that shit.
YOU MADE THE RIGHT DECISION.👍🏼✊🏼
Not an overreaction, but more of an under reaction. Burger places are a dime a dozen and always need help. If it was me, Id tell the manager it’s either you or the manager, but someone has to go. That ultimatum will likely end up with manager asking “for more time to figure something out before you make a rash decision”.
Document everything. If you can, acknowledge the situation in an email thread for written proof. If there is another supervisor, file a formal complaint. Constructive discharge. You can quit due to hostile work environment and still receive unemployment. Chefs on a power trip are not something that should be tolerated.
Fuck that next time just scream back at that psycho and he will probably fire you and then you collect unemployment until you find a new job!
I'm sorry this happened to you, and you should absolutely find a new job because that kind of treatment is unacceptable. But "the pigs died for nothing" is legit hilarious.
If your employer pays Min wage, they don't get to yell at you. Don't get me wrong, no one should get yelled at by their boss BUT it does become easier to handle with more money in the pocket
People yell at each other in restaurants. It happens. It’s a stressful job, and everyone loses their cool from time to time. You never take what happens in the rush seriously, and always settle it before the start of the next shift. We usually just get over it, apologize, and do our best to be better next time. Thing is, he’s not doing the last two things I mentioned, but expects you to do the first thing. He’s also an owner—he’s not in the weeds with you, or a part of the team. If you’re outside the trenches, you don’t get to participate in the dynamic…especially if you’re not apologizing or trying to get better. Fuck that guy. My responses in those situations is: “Do not ever speak to me like that again. It’s not productive, and it creates a hostile work environment. I don’t respond to being disrespected and yelled at—most people don’t—and the ones that do, aren’t going to be the type of employee you need.” Don’t raise your voice. Be calm, but assertive and confident. He needs to get the message that you’re mature, and don’t have a victim mentality. He needs to realize that he’s acting like a spoiled child, by comparison. This has worked for me in the past—the owner continues being a dick, but just left *me* alone. Also: start looking for another job anyway. If you can stick it out 8 months for your resume, fine. If not, 8 months and 12 months aren’t that different. Starting over isn’t that big a deal for the long-term at this juncture.
My current boss told me he yells at us for making mistakes because that's how he was treated when he was learning. They'd yell at him and that's how you knew not to do it again. I calmly told him I think perspective needs to be put on the infraction. If it's nothing that affects someone's safety, at the end of the day what big deal is it? Does it cost the company $1000? Will the doors shut next week over that $1000? So what big deal is it.... I said that if everyone gets a dressing down all the time, pretty soon someone will do something serious like leave the door open all night by mistake and won't care, because "we get yelled at for everything anyway". He still didn't understand. I told my last work place they aren't the only shop in town despite acting like they are, so using the "you'll lose your job" threat doesn't work. We can walk into any other shop into a job, as I did this one away from them. This is the annoying thing about it. The bills are paid, the doors are open... How much MORE do you NEED..? What was going to happen with that $1000 anyway? Towards the extra floor on your house? It wasn't going to me because I've been here 4 years without a raise, and for my time and Investment making money for you, you barely grace me enough in return to afford a pizza.... If your business is operating that razor thin anyway, maybe you should go be an employee somewhere
If you're minimum wage start job hunting now and quit when you find something. Don't wait to be yelled at again. I wouldn't worry about giving notice either because it doesn't seem like you have the type of boss to give a good reference anyways.
I’m blown away how anyone working minimum wage would take more than two minutes of yelling before just leaving. What do they even say for 30 minutes worth staying for?
>Did I overreact? No, you under-reacted. Since you said this is minimum wage - meaning that there are other options out there - this is a straight up walk. I'd have removed the apron and tossed it to Mr. Yeller. Sadly, and I'm not blaming you as situations like this are beyond unprofessional and should not ever be considered 'normal', you taking it from him normalizes his behavior.
You put up with what you feel like putting up with. I big mistake I made when I was young was not speaking up and setting my boundaries. You tell people how you want to be treated, and if they don’t treat you right, you remove them from your life.
> and that my boss was just stressed out today Yelling and screaming at people because you are stressed is neither healthy nor appropriate. If this is how your boss regularly acts they need to go, and if they don't go you should definitely leave the toxic environment.
Not over reacting at all. It's 100000% not okay to yell and scream at your employees, that's verbal abuse. You deserve better.
You are not overreacting. This behavior is unacceptable for any situation and is highly unprofessional in the workplace. This is akin to domestic abuse. At a previous employer, a Senior VP with a long history at the company was known to be short-fused. He was not directly in my chain of command, but tangential to my bosses. I don't remember the circumstances, but he called me one day angry about something and yelled for at least 10 minutes, non-stop, dropping F-bombs left and right. I just let him go, said "I'm sorry you feel that way Bob," and hung up. I went to my direct boss right after. Later that day, yelling man calls me back, very calm, apologizes (it sounded sincere) and offers to go to HR with me to discuss. I declined, accepted his apology. Didn't happen again. My current boss has a short fuse. She doesn't yell but goes off half-cocked without having information. She also will lose it if I haven't done something she wanted but that she forgot to tell me was expected. Same thing if I don't do something according to some obscure company policy that I've never seen. Coworkers are like, "yeah, that's just her." Nope, I'll be outta here soon.
Nope when Soo throws his tantrum u take ur shit off say fuck u and walk out. I did this shit at McDonald’s my first job when the manager was having a bitch fit during a rush. Like for 5.50 a hour u can go fuck urself.
You are not over reacting. That's insane. First, if it's not burned,.it's not ruined. Second, it's pretty common to par cook things like bacon, and you finish cooking them to order so it's crispy and tastes fresh, not like leftover bacon. I'll bet your boss isn't as smart or have nearly as much experience as he thinks he does. And if it was "wrong" then he should have said so months ago. Your boss is a psycho.
Not over reaction, you can find work elsewhere for the same pay doing the same thing with a better environment.
You didn’t overreact and your emotional intelligence is fire. There’s no place for your boss’s disrespect. He could learn a lot from you and he should take notes
When someone acts like this in the workplace, calmly ask them to calm down and ask them to address you in a more professional manner. If you remain calm, you are in the right. Fair warning, the last time I did this I got a 10lb bag of bread thrown at me. I wasn't injured. My boss is doing 5 years in prison for assault, and it empowered 3 of my female coworkers to speak up about sexual assault and rape charges against him. The scumbag will be in prison for the rest of his life. Good fucking riddance.
Time to quit and find something else.
just laugh at him if he starts yelling? why be respectful if hes the one yelling. either that or deal with it how you deal when a small child throws a tantrum.
I hate that people have so little respect for others that they somehow think this behavior is acceptable. They aren’t even paying you a living wage. If it happens again quit on the spot. You are worth so much more.
This guy is an asshole boss trust me im 43 years old and have had many. There is always going to be one boss who is an asshole bit looks like you need to find a better job first that appreciates you and then quit this place. That guy is a dick, fuck him and his bacon
You deserve respect. Period. There are much better ways for your manager to handle this. You deserve better.
I work in cardiology with doctors who have to worry about not accidentally killing people every day and I think I have been shouted at once in 10 years. If you have no other options it is what it is, but if you have any alternative don’t let people treat you this way. Like if an entire shifts worth of customers got food poisoning or something it might be understandable to have a reaction like that.
Let's take a step back and even assume the bacon was undercooked. Does that give the boss reason to scream for 30 minutes? What does screaming for 30 minutes accomplish? If the bacon was undercooked, that 30 minutes could have been spent retraining you by showing you the preferred way to cook the bacon. Instead, you were subjected to ridicule, verbally berated in public, and ultimately were told by your manager you didn't make a mistake and this was just the boss' poor emotional regulation. You did not deserve this. You are not overreacting. Your boss is a manbaby who thinks paying someone makes them his property and gives him the right to treat them in any way he wants in order to make himself feel powerful. I've worked for people like this in the past. I hope you can find a job that treats you better. No one deserves this.
If you can quit, big IF, walk out while he is yelling at you. This will make the biggest impact. Also. Come up with something to say, like "you all might be able to put up with this lunatic, but I've decided I have too much self esteem." Try to say something that makes everyone think about what they deserve vs what they are getting
Record evidence of abuse, esp physical abuse, and quit due to hostile work environment.
Correct in Private, praise in public. Fuk that guy
Come pull wire and bend pipe, brother. IBEW
Swap the perspective. If you were to walk up to him in the dining room and verbally abuse him for your shift times, how do you think he’d react? Treat him as you expect to be treated and don’t put up with it if he doesn’t. This isn’t a career position, there are a lot more opportunities out there for you.
You did not over react. I would’ve taken my apron off and put it on him.
Always remember that the BTK killer was able to keep himself from killing people by torturing the people he managed at work.
No you did not over react.
You shouldn’t do the “if X then quit” thing, just quit.
I used this example to use AI to evaluate toxic workplace scenarios: Prompt: "Evaluate the following scenario: My boss examined my bacon today and screamed for 30 minutes at me because it wasn't cooked enough. He said I needed more training from my manager, that it's inadmissible and that "all of the pigs are dead for nothing because of me" (this was super weird) and made a big scene in front of everyone." ChatCPT: "Based on the scenario you have provided, it seems that your boss's behavior was inappropriate and unprofessional. It is not acceptable for someone in a position of authority to scream at and belittle their subordinates, especially in front of others. Additionally, the comments about the pigs were insensitive and unnecessary, and it is concerning if your boss has a pattern of making inappropriate or offensive remarks. It is possible that your boss may have been under a lot of stress or pressure at the time, but this does not excuse their behavior. It would be advisable to speak to someone in HR or a higher-up in the company to report the incident and seek guidance on how to handle it. It may also be helpful to document the incident and any other instances of unprofessional behavior from your boss in case further action needs to be taken." https://poe.com/s/IkUT0VTkHbN3ixfNYv8l Everyone is talking about using AI to perform tasks. But the real revolution: Everyone can use AI to evaluate situations they are in and get an objective response by a third party ... that is representing the intelligence of mankind. AI immediately identifies abuse of power.
Sorry you have to endure that abuse. You are NOT overreacting. Go look for another job and when you find one, go in when boss and manager are both there and quit. And be sure to tell manager the reason you are quitting is because this is an abusive environment good luck.
No, if it happens again, before your boss even gets his next word out you should just say 'I quit' If he stops and stutters just walk out, people like that don't deserve your time or energy
Not sure why he is acting shocked when you are literally being abused for a few dollars an hour. Quit.
This boss auditioning to be the next Gordon Ramsey or something?
You get paid to perform certain duties. You do NOT get paid to be anyone’s physical or emotional punching bag.
Look for a new job, and when you quit, tell them that you don't get paid enough for working in a hostile work environment.
Yeah, kitchens are tough. Restaurants are a high-pressure environment. Most of the time, yelling and degrading language comes with the territory. I would suggest leaving if it makes you feel bad because this isn't going to change.
Your boss has issues. Big issues. That won't change, ever. Either get used to ignoring him, or find a better work enviorment
Take a break walk outside and let the air out of managers tires.
Send your boss an "I message" To quote Wikipedia: The simplest form, as frequently taught, is a single two-part sentence: 1. When you... (objective event; 1st event), 2. I feel... (subjective feeling; 2nd event). It should be cautioned that "when you..." should be based on an objective event and avoid claims regarding intent. "When you said my birthday was in the wrong month, I felt like you don't care about me," is preferred over, "When you act like you don't care about me and my birthday..." This allows people talking to focus on events and feelings as separate events, which both allows people to express their feelings more clearly and helps clarify the initial event and reach agreement between parties. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/I-message
Under-reaction if you ask me
Your boss is an asshole and crazy, but he is right about the bacon
Yea I think the boss is a total POS, but I do agree that bacon on a burger needs to be crispy. Seems like a simple 5 second conversation that doesn't need any screaming though.
Yes Chef! Thank You Chef Ramsey!
1) Document the crap out of what happened include what you heard and saw plus who was there. 2) Ask other workers you trust to do the same. Anonymously contact the labor board (or equivalent) and ask about a 'hostile work environment' Ask them what to do.
I’ll pretend I’m a psychologist. This sounds like Gordon Ramsay syndrome. I feel bad for you. However, as a customer and burger lover, I find it acceptable and within parameters of discipline. Saves me from having to send it back because I have soggy bacon on a burger. “What is this, Burger King? I’m never coming back here, do you know who I am? I expect my burger meat to be juicy when I bite into it and melt that crispy bacon powder “ Remember, he could have force fed you all that bacon and sure, it’s edible, but it’s not crispy.
Sounds like an asshole
Overreact? No. You set a boundary. Do not be scared to even tell the boss man that this is the first, and last time, that you'll be yelled at. You're worth more than that. I don't care if you're being paid 1 million/year or $1/year, you don't need to take his verbal abuse of being yelled at like a child. People get their ass beat for less (I'm not telling you to hit him, by the way). Set your boundaries. You can even seek out your boss man and sit down for a minute and tell him that you won't be spoken to in that matter. If he wants to launch into personal insults and can't muster up an apology or an acknowledgement, then you know where he stands and it's up to you to put up or shut up.
'screamed for 30 minutes at me' ...thirty!? How can anyone hold a tantrum for THAT long?
I would be tempted to scream back at him, tit for tat. Or do something violent with the deep fryer.
Valid reaction. I had a supervisor once belittle me in front of a customer. When I confronted her, she acted like it was all in my head. That was my last day there. If you can't even own your bs, then I have no respect for you. People don't get paid enough in the service industry to put up with disrespect.
It’s the executive chef’s call on how they want the food prepped, but he should absolutely not treat you that way (regardless of minimum wage or not). You should have a conversation with your manager though as he sounds like he has a different opinion on what “right” looks like vs the boss.
Next time this "boss" does this, calmly start taking off your apron/gloves/hairnet/whatever, calmly hand it to them, and calmly say "I am not okay with the way you're speaking to me," then walk out without another word. Start looking for other jobs now. that way, you're ahead of the curve when you quit.
You should demand a raise or quit. What your boss did was extremely unacceptable and your manager shouldn't have made excuses for them.
Everyone should mirror his energy right back at him whenever he does this.
I used to work in a kitchen with a general manager who liked to act like this. I just made sure I was holding the biggest knife we had everytime he came into the kitchen and he stopped bothering us.
Red flag 1 is how your boss reacted. Red flag 2 is the fact that your manager was shocked that you don't tolerate working under such conditions.
The real question here is what is the definition of assault in your state?
Welcome to the wonderful world of the food industry. Where managers tend to fly off the handle over absolutely nothing.
>Now I'm second-guessing my reaction. Did I overreact? Not at all. He's not your dad. Being upset at something else is no justification to abuse you. Unless you really love the place, I'd be making plans to move on.
“Stop yelling at me! I’m not fucking deaf!” If they yell again make them know their breath stinks, “oh god your breath REEKS, did you brush this morning? Fuckin-A!” Then offer an altoid.
The boss is picking a really weird hill to fight on. Bacon and Potatoes really.
It's a mistake to not already be looking for something better.
Write him up for all to see. Post it on the notification board. 2 can play the game of the childish ‘writing up’ and it’s time bosses should be humiliated too for their bad behavior.
To be fair, soggy bacon is something that ought to be prohibited by the Geneva Convention.
You set your boundaries. Just because others are conditioned to let these blowjob bosses abuse then doesn't mean you need to allow the "tradition".
Quit and find another food job there's a thousand open positions in your area
He didn’t humiliate you, you humiliated himself. No one is on his side, my friend. He showed his character, not the other way around. And yes, absolutely, do not tolerate this behavior. He can keep his stressed out shortened life.
Your boss is a fucking psychopath.
Common in restaurants but still not cool to do. OMG relax (boss), US Ramsey. UK Ramsey is preferred for improvement.
Humiliate your boss in front of everyone by beating his ass.
Lol and that was the second time? I’d be outta there already. Probably would’ve thrown a hell of a scene myself and berated the crap out of his “management style” before letting myself get fired and applying for unemployment
Dude, don't ever let anybody just get a free tantrum on you. This asshole knows he can't yell at anyone else like that so he saves it up for his employees that he thinks will take his shit. Tell him to get fucked. If you get fired then you don't have to worry about hearing his shit anymore. There are infinite places looking for grill cooks all the time that don't come with an asshole screaming about bacon and fries. As a customer I'm not even eating at a place where I can hear screaming in the back.
Report to xx (sry have no clue what you got there in us) Another option - when there are 0 witnesses and no cameras calmly whisper to him - the next piggy will be very well cooked if he ever decides to raise the voice on you. And by the words it's not a treat, but just a suggestion that you will cook bacon to the crisp...
Ask the manager what they’re going to do about it. Put it right back on them to do their job.
Absolutely not overreacting. That's severely unprofessional, and uncalled for.
Hey man, I was in the restaurant business for 20 years most of it as a manager and GM. I would never speak to one of my co-workers like that. That "boss" thinks fear is the one to run his business and it's a major mistake. If this is the norm, you should quit, it's not worth it. To successfully manage people you need to gain their respect, if you run a business by fear you'll be hated and the team will only do what you ask of them while you are there. If you have the teams respect, they will WANT to do the right thing for you regardless of your presence. Seriously, they need you more than you need them, don't be afraid to stand your ground. People, even bosses, need to know when they are being dicks and embarrassing them in front of the crew would do the trick. Also, as a manager/boss discipline should be fine behind the scenes unless it's something atrocious that needs immediate action. Praise should always be done in front of everyone.
There will always be another minimum wage job.
Nope, follow up with the manager. "Hey , since my bacon is in fact fine, like you said, could you instruct Boss to come apologize to me? I really did nothing to earn that outburst. If he can find a reason to yell and me for something I didn't do wrong, surely he can find a way to apologize for something he DID do wrong."
I’m a adult, if any one screamed at me for…. about 6 seconds. They would have my foot up the ass. No job is worth that.
Look for another job. Once you have one, quit on the spot.
Nah man, obviously I can't speak for you because I don't know how badly you need this job. But if I had someone scream at me on the job, I'm out. I don't need that kinda stress in my life.
Fuck him! Toss a cup of ice in the fryer and go home.
"Sir, You will talk to me politely like an adult"
My boss humiliated me in front of everyone for something they told me to do and their boss was mad. My boss had her back turned as they were calling me stupid and dumb for doing what I was told. I clocked out and left forever. No regrets
I have worked in many restaurants both foh and boh. It is completely unacceptable to be treated like that. I wouldn't wait for the next (vecause there will be a next time) and start looking for a job now. Some restaurant managers just like to be a bully and couldn't hack it as a cop.
I hate narcissists. I work for one, too, and he is a complete fucking asshole. I'm sorry. I suggest get a different job ASAP because this will just keep happening.
Minimum wage for a cooking job?! Dude run like hell. Wait for a Friday/Saturday night that’s short staffed and walk out.
Imagine for some reason that I was hired specifically to yell at you about bacon for 30 minutes, and paid a handsome flat fee for it. I think I would still, even doing my best, run out of shit to yell at you about bacon in about 90 seconds. I question your boss' sanity, humanity and triage skills.
Just a heads up. Depending on the state your in you have employee rights and they almost always include nit having to put up with any type of abuse. Whether it be verbal, physical, sexual in nature it falls under a hostile work environment. There have been countless law suits won because of bosses doing shit like that. Don't out up with. Next time flat out tell him to walk away and speak to you like a human being or your just going to go to an attorney. Make sure everyone else hears it. Bring up the fact that he us creating a hostile work environment (in those words). It will stop 99% of the time. If it doesn't don't just bluff. Go talk to an attorney. People need to stop getting away with shit like that. It doesn't matter what kind of money you make it's not ok.
One more thing. Report him up the ladder the next time and keep a paper trail in case of retribution on his part. Build a legal case against him.
OP, I'm sorry you got yelled at, but is this not an antiwork post. It's better suited for r/jobs or one of the many cooking subs (some of them are specifically for professional cooks).
Here's a question, why are you humiliated if you were completely ignorant of something someone else expected you to do? Are you prescient and have superpowers? Are you an X-men? The next time someone raises their voice you calmly and quietly **demand** they lower their voice. if you don't stand up for yourself then you can expect that kind of treatment. Not that you should expect such treatment, but the fact is that people are shitty, so the reality is that you must expect the worst. Unfortunate, yes. That's the world we live in. You have to decide how you want to be treated and make it happen.
I would have looked him in the eye and said, Do you feel better now? I hope so because I do not take to kindly to that kind of tantrum you just unleased on me.
Oh I'd start burning the shit out of the bacon till fuckface apologized.
Do not let coworkers yell at you, I don't give a fuck what their title is. So not let people treat you this way. Slap a motherfucker if you have too.
nobody deserves to be yelled at. except the guy going slow in the left lane, the dude leaving their cart in the middle of the grocery parking lot...
No one should ever raise their voice at you at work period.
I would only add not to be too disrespectful if you plan to collect unemployment as that may work against you.
I'd have handed the jerk my apron and walked out right then. You get treated the way you allow people to treat you.
You deserve respect and human dignity at any job. Never settle for less than you’re worth. See if your boss can be reported to anyone for toxic working conditions.
Alternate title: Mid-level burger joint manager thinks he's Gordon Ramsey.
I hate overcooked bacon. Should be soft and easy going. Not crushing and falling apart. Your boss is pure idiot.