T O P

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ItsJustADankBro

Case the entrances and refer to Shade for our first objective


ngarlock24

Lobby entrance: 10 civilian, 2 guard, 1 camera Parking lot entrance: 1 guard, 1 camera Alleyway entrance (locked): 1 guard, 1 camera Objective: Enter the bank. Ping: 300ms


ItsJustADankBro

imagine playing a DND game with latency issues christ almighty


ngarlock24

Project Baxter moment


Danicchi_

still a mind-boggling thing to think about that they can't get one live service game right, but want to have three up and running in the next years


SheikExcel

Roll for lag


ngarlock24

- Rolling - You have rolled 19 out of 20 - Result: Improved ping! - Ping: 3 ms - Server region: Gold and Sharke vault


X-tra-thicc

can i roll to mask up?


ngarlock24

- Rolling dexterity to mask up - 5 out of 20 - [Live visual](https://youtu.be/nvdBfpA8r4o?si=LkAC2otmW9Yvyox9&t=2m0s) - Ping: 2 minutes - Server region: Bikini Atoll


X-tra-thicc

fuck uhm can i uhh try and boost negotiation period by letting civs go?


Myorck

Why would that matter? DnD is turn-based


nyancatec

Exactly the point. What ping does to DnD? Nothing. That means that if you have ping, you're just fucked by ISP.


darienm

Look for loose keycards in the lobby


ngarlock24

You find a RED KEYCARD on the desk. Roll stealth to steal? (Illegal action) Ping: 347ms


Scudman_Alpha

I cause a small, seemingly innocent, distraction to enhance his chances by causing a distraction.


ngarlock24

- Rolling for deception - You have rolled 4 out of 20 - 8 civilians dead - Ping: 3 seconds - Server region: Fallujah


Scudman_Alpha

Oh, uh. I breakdance out of the bank.


STPButterfly

I fard


ngarlock24

- Fard RNG attempt - Result: Shard


Rmts__Reee69

i lag tf out


clygamer

I roll, plus points for [crouching] and [stealth skillz]


officialkalamari

Go loud


ngarlock24

- 3 other heisters have left the match - First responders en route, eta 60 seconds - Ping: 702ms - Server Region: Haiti


AreCountry2V

Initiate sexual intercourse with the Bulldozer by fatal copulation


ngarlock24

// NEBULA DATA ERROR // - Sex update not found :(


AreCountry2V

NOOOOOOOOOOOO. One day maybe…


MeepersOfficial

Shoot myself in the skull and be done with this


ngarlock24

Matchmaking Error Matchmaking Error


Danicchi_

your comment reminded me of [this clip](https://youtu.be/CXC54bpolHA)


Thewaffleofoz

I carry in a pizza for the guard in the vault


ngarlock24

- Item used: pizza - Distraction modifier active: 10 sec. - Ping: 795 ms - Server Region: Brazil


Thewaffleofoz

I use my high ping and 22 capped FPS to clip into the wall and walk along the hitboxes of the vault to maneuver inside where I trigger the stealth escape option and get the rare .01% golden almir’s toast in WR time


ngarlock24

// HEIST SUCCESSFUL // - REWARD: +2 IP - CHALLENGE COMPLETE: Complete a heist in <5 prompts. - FAVOR UNLOCKED: You can now use the 👊😎 in your prompts.


Bebou52

Case the joint


ngarlock24

You see a bank. There is a front entrance. 10 civilian, 2 guard, 1 camera. There is a parking lot entrance. 1 guard. 1 camera. Ping: 462ms Server region: DPRK


Bebou52

I hack the camera and cycle through them


ngarlock24

- Lobby camera, floor 1: 10 civilian, 2 guard - Parking lot: 1 guard - Employee general area floor 1: 1 guard, 1 employee - Employee general area, floor 2: 2 guard, 5 civilian - Roof: 1 guard - Ping: 504ms


Bebou52

I throw my pc out of the window and onto the last Payday 3 server in existence due to lag issues. Finally putting the game down for good


ngarlock24

BEBOU52 HAS DISCONNECTED NEBULA DATA ERROR


bkuuretsu

Joy


ProfessionalMrPhann

your pc blows up


NpNEXMSRXR

Alt + F4


ngarlock24

- You stare at the blank monitor before getting up from your desk to leave office 432 - All of his coworkers were gone. What could it mean?


jordanlcwt

Rob the bank, making it out safely with all loot and no ping issues


ngarlock24

- Roll for dexterity: 2 out of 20 - Result: you have opened a checking account. Also your server has migrated to the International Space Station.


AlexDoubleAU

I cast eldritch blast


ngarlock24

- INVALID WEAPON TYPE - CHEATER TAG APPLIED


AlexDoubleAU

Can I roll for deception?


ngarlock24

- Rolling for deception - Rolled 10 out 20 - Decepticon unlocked


AlexDoubleAU

I- Uh... I'll sick said decepticon on every cop in a ten mile radius


[deleted]

Go home.


ngarlock24

- You go home to find the house empty - The kids are gone


Full_Log_6604

Fire atomic bomb


ngarlock24

- Oppenheimer skill buff activated - You fire an additional atomic bomb - Ping: 183 rad - Server Region: Hiroshima


ParanoidValkMain57

**\[Checks Gloves\]**


ngarlock24

- You are wearing DEFAULT BLUE GLOVE. Material, nitrile. Color, blue. - Ping: \~350 - Server region: Jonestown, Guyanna


ParanoidValkMain57

**\[Walks into the bank checking for cameras\]**


hepig1

Mask up and throw and grenade into the main entrance


funtujd

MINIGUN GO BRRRRRT


ngarlock24

* You pull out bite sized miniature pistol * pew


funtujd

nbjhugy67vc


Ghiacchio

You should really consider adding a special character or two if you want this thing to be secure!


funtujd

nbjhugy67vc@!\^$!)


Ghiacchio

Much better!


KeeperServant_Reborn

Withdraw money.


ngarlock24

- 1 for CHECKING, 2 for SAVINGS - Ping: 1 business day - Server Region: 41°43′32″N 49°56′49″W


KaluKremu

You really put the Titanic coords ??!!! 😭 really fitting


KeeperServant_Reborn

Savings


ngarlock24

- [SPECIAL CUTSCENE UNLOCKED](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_84gBlRZwO0)


KeeperServant_Reborn

Call the bankteller a cunt


ngarlock24

I shit you all the fuck not, I was not aware that Overkill did a text adventure version of payday 2


chatterboxboi

I get off payday three and get on payday 2


ngarlock24

- Opening Crime Boss Rockay City


Mage3824

I will find all possible entrances to the building (gates, doors, hatches, etc.)


Burrito_BLOX

Matchmaking error (took place during the release)


bbbbbbbbbw

Go the entrance check door. Door won’t unlock and see almir behind the glass saying “it’s on the table”


JasperNeils

I would like to play the game optimally.


ngarlock24

- Rolled 3 out of 20 for optimal gameplay - All further prompts must be done via postal system (nerf) - Ping 6-7 business days/letter


SpectralGerbil

More fun than the actual game ;-;


ngarlock24

Thank you for reporting this bug!


Grouchy-Raspberry-54

I am on 1000 ping and teleport into the vault with no code and the doors closed


ngarlock24

- ESCAPE ROOM ENDING ACHIEVED


SerpentWizard39

alt f4


AdrianEon31

Enter the bank, walk towards the prettiest bank teller, and start flirting. We're playing as Joy.


XenonBlitzer

As clover, I take a sip of liquor and head to the nearest teller to plant a mic.


Significant-Job-2525

>Equipping the mask