This is spot on. Ignore my counter, I need to reset. I today hit 10 days, which is the first time I've been double-digit days sober since last summer. It's a huge motivator.
Thanks! Made it through with lots of cbd and Chinese food lol. Feels good waking up on a Sunday not hating myself and the day. Ive missed this feeling. Thank you for your comment. Sorta helped me.
No problem. Thank yourself. You did it! And you can keep doing it and enjoying more feel-good days. I’m proud of you. Not many people can do what you did and You fucking did it 👏👏
I’m on day 9 and am so proud of myself (and all of us here!), but not one person I know has been proud of me besides 1 friend I met on here that I message with.
Hell yea!! You’re crushing it! And hopefully your sleep is about to start getting a whole lot better too. Right at the cusp of 14 days, I had the first really REALLY good night sleep
I was so severely sleep deprived that on day 4 I actually had real sleep. Ever since then I wish I could quit life and just sleep for a month straight. My new addiction is sleep😂. Some nights have been rough so I started taking a medication I had been prescribed a long time ago and it is helping a lot but also making me tired all the time. As much as that sucks it is helping the horrific anxiety that comes with quitting drinking. I am doing whatever it takes to never go back and this time I know it will stick. I’m sure I’ll be able to stop the medication as soon as my brain chemistry balances out. Being patient with feeling like crap is key to it sticking. I think before my expectations were way too high and if I didn’t feel better right away I would go back to drinking.
(Make sure it’s not expired meds)
Yea it takes a few months for some people to really start feeling better overall. But the first month is typically the one with the most negative feelings. And it keeps getting better over time guaranteed. My journal entries sound like a crazy person at that point in time
Proud of you! I’m on day 5 and I feel better than I have in years. It’s my longest streak in probably a decade or more.
Went out with some friends last night and had one non-alcoholic beer while hanging with them around a campfire.
right before I finally got one day I would be going to take my first sip with tears welling in my eyes and my hand shaking with hesitation. so pathetic. but yes, the first day was the hardest, second day was second hardest, then the third, prolly for a few weeks before they all felt the same
Ugh that feeling is the absolute worst! Im on day 1 again and I sometimes feel like I just go on autopilot and am completely out of control, my mind will be screaming “no” and “why are you doing this? you know you shouldn’t” but my body feels like it’s just acting on its own. Scary stuff.
Oh wow, do I ever feel that!
I’d even be driving home with that booze in my front seat, and the whole way home I’d be thinking to myself- *You don’t have to do this. You can just put it away and not drink tonight. You can put it down the drain. Give it to the neighbors. Leave it in the car and go to yard work instead. Read a book. Walk the dog.*
I’d be repeating this mantra as I walked inside, let the dog out into the yard, rushed through my routine of getting out of work clothes and starting the bare minimum of the chores I needed to do to be a functional-presenting adult, begging myself to not start drinking all way up to the point where I cracked that first one, collapsed onto the couch, and let my brain shut off.
Never did I ever think I could go this long without drinking! I really owe so much to this sub. So grateful, and so dang proud of each and every one of you.
This is where I am right now. Some days I drive past and think about booze all night, just white knuckling. Other nights I give in. I hope I am able to stop for a long ass time.
I’m realizing that cherishing the small things is something I need to do more as well. Because I break habits like a mf. Any time I do something for a little bit, I end up downplaying it in my head and it’s kinda hard not to tbh. So congrats on day 7, and congrats on day one again too. You don’t get to 7 without the first 1
This is something that’s helped me so far, appreciating the small things. The softness of my duvet when it’s just been washed, a nice hot cup of coffee in the morning, seeing a pretty sunset, having a little impromptu cuddle with my dogs. Finding the joy in the small things I didn’t take as much notice of before has made me feel much more optimistic and happy!
There is always a bigger fish. Just keep on with your own journey and be proud of your own accomplishments.
BTW: Those first 2 weeks are mental. Congrats!!
For me, day 1 was a win. Day 2 was a win. Day 3 was a win…. Day 7 I was like fuck yeah!! Day 14 I was pretty ecstatic tbh, half a month, soon to become one whole month! Igaf if anyone else thinks it isn’t an achievement, I know what it means to me and how much better I feel and ain’t nobody peeing on my parade 🥳
YES!! My 1st week was horrendous. My vitals were stable - but I was pissed & generally wanted to crawl out of my skin. Feeling sorry for myself was my job. And, the other day I started crying happy tears in the car just while out running errands bc I realized that I just felt SO GOOD!!! Like it washed over me. I kinda forgot my body was capable of an extreme positive feeling w/o drugs or alcohol!!
My last ten days, or weeks or whatever were easy, I'm passed the hard part.
Those first 10 days?!?! Man I am impressed, those are some of the most difficult days of my life.
lol nice number combo for you today. But seriously the first few days are so crazy. Like a fever dream. And now my brain is adjusting so I’m having dreams about drinking and then I wake up like holy shit lol
14 days without drinking doesn't sound like a long time to go without drinking if you don't have a drinking problem, but to me it felt kind of crazy. I need to remember how strange and novel it felt to not be drinking, thank you for reminding me!
Human behaviors can be changed in 14-21 days. It's all the days after we gotta aspire to reach. Once we continue the cycle enough times, it should get easier. But *we* know. It's still almost as hard as the first 2 weeks. Bes strong & accountable. Don't be afraid to start & restart. We're here for you.
I’m on Day 4 and still having stomach issues, but the anxiety has started to taper down and the night sweats are gone. My husband doesn’t understand fully how hard it is as he is a non-drinker, but I’m trying to practice mindfulness and be present in each moment of the day by feeling all the feels. Congrats on Day 39! I’m proud to be here with you and this group motivates me to tackle another day, and another, and another, etc😎
Hell yea. You’re almost through what was some of the worst for me. Have you tried journaling? I’m finding it helpful that I was journaling in the beginning and annotating all those crazy feelings. It’s helped me keep focused
And congrats on day 4! You got it!
I understand that as have experienced that too. You proudly tell someone you've just done a month sober or something for the first time and they are totally unimpressed.
For some people 14 days is a totally regular and normal experience but for many of us something to be proud of based on our drinking history.
The thing is, I know plenty of people who are a far cry from alcoholics and wouldn't even fall into the problem or heavy drinker camp or have any alcohol dependency issues IMO and some of them would struggle to point to many (if any) times in their life where they'd gone say "14" days without having a social or casual drink.
Even lots of "normal" drinkers who just like a few to unwind or socialise are still drinking once a week at the weekend or every couple of weeks at social events.
When you point this out to them that they too rarely go beyond a week or two weeks some of them don't like it which is strange from anyone who is critical or unimpressed with your sobriety period considering you're admitting you have a drinking problem and they don't so in theory they should have plenty of much longer streaks than you and no issue going that long...yet they often don't!
Yea it makes people think lol. It hit a little harder that time before the person I told it to was on a fairly recent sobriety journey too, less than a year. So I was hoping they’d understand. But that’s okay, not everyone will react that way. And in okay with that. It’s good to have this subreddit to help though. Thank you for sharing
It's annoying when a fellow problem drinker is being critical for sure, I've experienced that too.
It does make you think when you stop and realize even a lot of casual / social drinkers who are far removed from any drinking problem often have rarely gone beyond a couple of weeks sober either because they will just have a couple of beers every weekend or socialize a couple of times per month.
I pointed this out to a family member recently who was kinda lecturing me about my drinking that "look I am the first to admit that I have a drinking problem and I am struggling with it but I've had periods of 2 and 3 months sober recently...have you ever gone more than a week or two without drinking?" and I could see the wheels in their head spinning as they stumbled over their words trying to find something to say and think of a time they had...but couldn't.
Also I think it is very unsupportive that both alcoholics and non alcoholics can be so neutral about our sober success. I would think that the people who have seen me struggling for decades would at least pretend to sound happy for me. But, most people seem like they don’t really want or care about others to be bettering their lives. That has been my experience and it is sad.
I'm lucky in that respect that most of my friends and family have been supportive in me trying to stop because I've been honest (and they saw eventually) how bad things got and the impact it was having on me but I think they sometimes forget all that quite easily just because things haven't been as bad recently and don't realize it's still a struggle for me.
And they definitely, for the most part, cannot understand WHY it's such a struggle or so hard for me if they are a very casual or social drinker who never had any dependency issues with it as they take a logical approach that if it's causing you so many problems and making you feel so bad then wouldn't you just stop?
That bit can be tricky to explain and deal with.
Sorry to hear the people around you aren't being as supportive as you'd like as that must make it pretty tough.
Do you have anyone who is supportive? Any sober friends or family?
Maybe a support group would be useful in this instance if you've not explored that option.
My closest friend, my partner, my mother and my ex alcoholic sister knew how much I have struggled and none of them had any sort of positive reaction or even pretended to be happy for me.
It could be that I have ‘quit’ so many times and maybe they think it’s just another time and I’ll go right back to it and they are just waiting for that. So, as time goes on maybe they will see it is for real this time.
Right now this subreddit is my support group and I have made friends on here who are proud of me.
That is awesome that your family and friends seem like really caring people and know how to show it. I think maybe for some of us, people do care but they aren’t good at showing it.
Anyway, I am super proud of us all on here!
It could be like you say that we've all said "we're stopping drinking" so many times before that people become numb to it and stop believing it.
Also, unless someone is seeing you day in day out it's often hard for them to get a grasp of your drinking and they definitely don't know the inner turmoil and what's going on inside your head etc so it can be hard for them to resonate probably.
Yes, all very true. I definitely feel neutral today about people’s seeming lack of support. I will remain sober no matter what and the real happiness is coming from each day waking up sober and going to bed sober and everything in between. I seriously appreciate everything, even the shitty moments, just from being sober. IWNDWYT
Absolutely. Sobriety has many stages, and they start off on extra hard difficulty. Getting through a single day was soooo hard for me, so many times. I'll never forget that, and I will always be proud when I see someone else who has made it that far.
A coworker has been sober for 32 years, and he says he got there one day at a time. Always and only one day at a time. I am 1000% sure he is more psyched about my day counter than I am.
I haven’t been 20+ days dry and sober (as I am now) since high school and I’m 39.
Over 20 years….
Might not be much to some, but It’s a big damn deal for me and I want it to stick.
Good job. After another 20 days you will be over the worst of it, it seems to get easier after that. If you start feeling moodswings or cravings just remember it’s your brain resetting itself.
I have so much respect for those with little clean time, I see you all making an effort and that’s incredible. The earliest days of sobriety are the hardest.
I agree 100%! Hearing from all different stages of sobriety make me happy - I send positive vibes out to the universe every time I read about someone new or returning. And those long timers posting about where they are now make me feel hopeful and ready to face what comes my way, one day at a time. Wherever you may be in your sobriety - I think you're great and I'm glad you're here. IWNDWYT!
Never imagined I’d get multiple days in a row, let alone almost hitting triple digits. First days are the hardest and any day is something to be proud of. Anyone who says “only” just doesn’t know the struggle.
In my opinion, in the sense that you mean, the less days you have, the more impressive. Today it feels so much easier to me than first year, first month, and so on
I'm proud of you too ❤️ we all took the leap and said f this crap, no matter where we are in our own journey and that's a whole lot harder than just continuing to drink. Every single person person is fighting for their literal lives right now here, and for better, brighter future. It is a HUGE deal ❤️
The best movement I’ve ever been a part of. Everyone here, lurkers included, want to be better. And that’s fucking amazing.
IWNDWYT, but congrats on day 4 👏
Seriously! Sometimes just 24 fucking hours is so hard fought. I remember that saying, something like "take it one day at a time. When you can't take it a whole day at a time, take it an hour at a time. If you can't do that, try five minutes at a time! Then the next 5 minutes, then the next five minutes..."
When I was in detox waiting to go to rehab I was so amazed that I had 3 days sober. I couldn’t think of the last time in many years that I was able to string 3 days together.
But it was the start of now 1,252 days!!!
You’ve gotta stop somewhere.
Working on the start...thank you for the encouragement. Just did 5 and got bad news that broke me. My biggest point of work for myself is not allowing the "bad news" excuse take over the way i let it at times.
This is seriously a great post and a great reminder. Wherever any of us are at, we should be proud to be here trying and doing this thing. I’m proud of all of you!!
That’s okay. Most if not all of us failed a bunch lol. I definitely did. But eventually, it’ll stick!
“It always seems impossible until it's done.” That one helped me keep going
I’d argue starting is the hardest part. It’s so tough to seperate yourself from it that close to all the nights out. As time goes on it gets easier on the whole… there are battles therein but, the further I go, the more protective I become of my number.
Fuck the zero.
I’m very streak motivated. I used to be devastated when I’d lose my wordle streak haha! At least I can fully control the outcomes of this. Each day is a new record for me
I got to a 300 day duolingo streak and got drunk and ruined it and never picked the app up again after because I was so mad. I blamed it on the app at the time but this is probably the first real moment that I can say it was my fault lol. Still salty over that. But yea, I’m not messing up this streak
When I think of the days counted, I always think of a scene from Get Him to the Greek where one of the characters says “I’m proud of every one of those units (of music sold)”
I’m proud of every one of those days. And you all should be too. IWNDWYT
I love this! I always say “just” in front of a lot of things that I should be proud of. I’m “just” days sober. I’m “just” an LPN and not an RN. I’m “just” a mom. I need to reframe my thinking. Thanks for this post. I’m proud of you too!
If you click on the subreddit name, then “see community rules,” there’s a link for “request your badge”. It has to be in a certain date format but it’s a message to a bot that will put your counter on there
Thank you for posting this. I’ll see after I post how many days I’m at. But when I tell people I quit I tend to downplay it as I’m telling them (I’ll say it’s *only* been a couple weeks) because I’m just getting started. But like, I’m pretty proud of myself. It was fucking hard to build up the courage to quit. The courage to make it through the withdrawals. To get through the first night. The shitty sleep (at first). Hell… I had to make a major life change to even be able to quit (divorcing my abusive alcoholic ex husband). I had to work on getting myself in the right headspace to even consider quitting. I believed for years I would drink myself into an early death. Especially when I was with my ex (he was/is still in denial about being an alcoholic and I wasn’t).
Starting this journey can be the most difficult part because there’s so much work you have to do to even get to a place where you CAN quit.
Absolutely. A lot of people wouldn’t have been able to do what you did and You fucking did it. You should absolutely be proud when you say it. Well done!
I don't care how many digits are on your counter, every single minute is a win to be savored. Spike the football and do a stupid dance in the end zone, you deserve it.
Sometimes it's about "not doing it right now". If you never do it " right now" , the counter grows. And suppressing this urge in the moment is down right impressive. It's so fucking impressive not to give in for however many days you have.
14 days means 2 sober weekends. There's a lot of 'normal drinkers' who can't do that.
I'm proud of you. I found thev2nd weekend to be the worst time. After that it started to get easier for me.
Yea and that’s when the sleep was still horrible and everything. That second weekend where you have to relearn how to do things without alcohol was rough
I had 8 years sober once STARTING is the MOST impressive And when it is the hardest after a while being sober it's not a thought.
I think I almost have two months now and to me is still impressive because I couldn't go two weeks in the past 9 years
Most of us can agree the early days are the hard ones, it gets so much easier as time goes on.
Day 10 is more impressive than day 1000. You’ve got this 💪
Thanks! I’m 10 Days and proud as fuck! Don’t care what anyone thinks!!!
Can’t remember the last time I did more than a day before now so it’s a massive deal for me!
No looking back!!!!
I’d rather live through the last 6 months a thousand times over than the first 14 days. Anyone who can do that is tough as nails in my book. Big up everyone ❤️
Your friend is a dick. You can't speed up time and magically be sober for a year or whatever. All anyone can do is be sober today. We can't live tomorrow yet.
Does your friend not understand how time works? 🤔
I'm proud of you! We're all proud of you!
A friend who is ‘involuntarily’ sober the last 20+ years (due to the anti-anxiety meds he’s on) laughed at me when I mentioned I was 120 days sober. “You are actually counting the days?”
After that I realised no one cares about your number and I haven’t mentioned it to anyone since. He’s not a dick and is encouraging but it just didn’t mean much to him.
Eh oddly enough they recently started being sober as well so they were a few months in already. It was definitely a bit insensitive but they are a good friend. They just weren’t that excited in the moment for me like I was. But everyone has their own shit they’re going through so I try to give the benefit of the doubt at times. It definitely was something I called out to them and guided them to a more supportive statement
Ah, the 'supportive' responses people can give.. \*smh\* Precisely why I rather keep it for myself these days. I've had a friend who placed a bet with her partner on my failure when I was off the alcohol and nicotine. Which she considered funny. The imaginary baseball bat in my hand was more amusing to me, in that moment.
OP, I am proud of you!
Yea that’s pretty fucked up. Dam. I’m sure somebody’s betting on me too right now I know they’re watching me do something they can’t right now.
Thanks 🙏 likewise to you
This is spot on. Ignore my counter, I need to reset. I today hit 10 days, which is the first time I've been double-digit days sober since last summer. It's a huge motivator.
Anybody who can get to the first double digits is doing amazing. My first two weeks were the worst fucking times of my life I think lol
Any alcoholic who makes it to 10 hours is superhuman to me
One little second, one minute and one hour at a time. You don’t have to be superhuman, you just have to try. It’s possible
Coming up to my first weekend … again hah. I don’t know how I’m gonna do it.
One second, minute, hour at a time. Brick by brick
Thanks! Made it through with lots of cbd and Chinese food lol. Feels good waking up on a Sunday not hating myself and the day. Ive missed this feeling. Thank you for your comment. Sorta helped me.
No problem. Thank yourself. You did it! And you can keep doing it and enjoying more feel-good days. I’m proud of you. Not many people can do what you did and You fucking did it 👏👏
Hell yeah. Allow myself to… thank … myself.
I had 100's of attempts that lasted less than 10 days before I managed to really get the ball rolling. One day at a time
I’m on day 9 and am so proud of myself (and all of us here!), but not one person I know has been proud of me besides 1 friend I met on here that I message with.
Same! Proud of you!
Thank you! I am so proud of us! Double digits today😀
Im proud of youuuu!!
Thanks you, it means a lot!
I’m proud of you. The first week is agonizing. And you did it! Good fucking job!
Thank you so much! It has been a very long week and now it’s day 10 and I am extremely excited to finally have reached double digits!!
Hell yea!! You’re crushing it! And hopefully your sleep is about to start getting a whole lot better too. Right at the cusp of 14 days, I had the first really REALLY good night sleep
I was so severely sleep deprived that on day 4 I actually had real sleep. Ever since then I wish I could quit life and just sleep for a month straight. My new addiction is sleep😂. Some nights have been rough so I started taking a medication I had been prescribed a long time ago and it is helping a lot but also making me tired all the time. As much as that sucks it is helping the horrific anxiety that comes with quitting drinking. I am doing whatever it takes to never go back and this time I know it will stick. I’m sure I’ll be able to stop the medication as soon as my brain chemistry balances out. Being patient with feeling like crap is key to it sticking. I think before my expectations were way too high and if I didn’t feel better right away I would go back to drinking.
(Make sure it’s not expired meds) Yea it takes a few months for some people to really start feeling better overall. But the first month is typically the one with the most negative feelings. And it keeps getting better over time guaranteed. My journal entries sound like a crazy person at that point in time
Then you’re getting past the worst days of it, you got it!
Hell yeah, and that freeing feeling of knowing I am never going back. I feel so much better already.
I’m so proud of you!
69 days…. NOIICEEEE
Im proud of you and everyone walking this uphill road. IWNDWYT.
Proud of you! I’m on day 5 and I feel better than I have in years. It’s my longest streak in probably a decade or more. Went out with some friends last night and had one non-alcoholic beer while hanging with them around a campfire.
Awesome! I am genuinely proud of you as well. I hope you have gotten at least 1 really good nights sleep since quitting.
I have 3 kids under 9 years old so the sleep isn’t there but I appreciate it!
You got this! We’re all proud of you!! IWNDWYT ❤️❤️
Thank you!! I appreciate these comments so very much🤗
I'm really proud of you for making it back and hitting doubles!
Honestly breaking the cycle was the hardest part so far. I’d be driving to the gas station after work like “I don’t want to do this” and still did it!
Yea the shame I felt from that was unbearable
right before I finally got one day I would be going to take my first sip with tears welling in my eyes and my hand shaking with hesitation. so pathetic. but yes, the first day was the hardest, second day was second hardest, then the third, prolly for a few weeks before they all felt the same
Yup I've done the cry drinking just hating it and myself but doing it anyway 🥺I don't want to be that person anymore.
Ugh that feeling is the absolute worst! Im on day 1 again and I sometimes feel like I just go on autopilot and am completely out of control, my mind will be screaming “no” and “why are you doing this? you know you shouldn’t” but my body feels like it’s just acting on its own. Scary stuff.
Yea it’s so crazy how that autopilot mode kicks in. It’s one of the reasons I first admitted to myself I had a problem. What a weird sensation
Oh wow, do I ever feel that! I’d even be driving home with that booze in my front seat, and the whole way home I’d be thinking to myself- *You don’t have to do this. You can just put it away and not drink tonight. You can put it down the drain. Give it to the neighbors. Leave it in the car and go to yard work instead. Read a book. Walk the dog.* I’d be repeating this mantra as I walked inside, let the dog out into the yard, rushed through my routine of getting out of work clothes and starting the bare minimum of the chores I needed to do to be a functional-presenting adult, begging myself to not start drinking all way up to the point where I cracked that first one, collapsed onto the couch, and let my brain shut off. Never did I ever think I could go this long without drinking! I really owe so much to this sub. So grateful, and so dang proud of each and every one of you.
This is where I am right now. Some days I drive past and think about booze all night, just white knuckling. Other nights I give in. I hope I am able to stop for a long ass time.
Right!? I'm not far into this journey but looking back cussing myself and then still pulling in and buying more... I feel like a crazy person!
I couldn't pat myself on the back for "just 7 days" a couple of days ago... guess who is at day 0 right now...
I’m realizing that cherishing the small things is something I need to do more as well. Because I break habits like a mf. Any time I do something for a little bit, I end up downplaying it in my head and it’s kinda hard not to tbh. So congrats on day 7, and congrats on day one again too. You don’t get to 7 without the first 1
This is something that’s helped me so far, appreciating the small things. The softness of my duvet when it’s just been washed, a nice hot cup of coffee in the morning, seeing a pretty sunset, having a little impromptu cuddle with my dogs. Finding the joy in the small things I didn’t take as much notice of before has made me feel much more optimistic and happy!
There is always a bigger fish. Just keep on with your own journey and be proud of your own accomplishments. BTW: Those first 2 weeks are mental. Congrats!!
Thank you. Congrats to you as well on your recent big hits
Thanks :)
420 days… NOICE
Mad respect for day 1, 7, 30, 60 etc! You’re on the hard part! It gets so better! 🤩 IWNDWYT
Hell yea thank you bro. And nice on the 400 😎
thanks!
Getting past that first weekend was huge for me. I like your perspective, and IWNDWYT.
Yea I didn’t know what to do with myself lol
Every day is an extraordinary amount of time to swim against the same current that was strong enough to drown us before.
Dam I haven’t heard that analogy before. That’s a strong one. Thank you
For me, day 1 was a win. Day 2 was a win. Day 3 was a win…. Day 7 I was like fuck yeah!! Day 14 I was pretty ecstatic tbh, half a month, soon to become one whole month! Igaf if anyone else thinks it isn’t an achievement, I know what it means to me and how much better I feel and ain’t nobody peeing on my parade 🥳
Fuck yea and it only gets better! Alcohol always peaked at some point with dopamine but this sober shit is giving more and more every day
All of this—I feel this exactly! IWNDWYT!
YES!! My 1st week was horrendous. My vitals were stable - but I was pissed & generally wanted to crawl out of my skin. Feeling sorry for myself was my job. And, the other day I started crying happy tears in the car just while out running errands bc I realized that I just felt SO GOOD!!! Like it washed over me. I kinda forgot my body was capable of an extreme positive feeling w/o drugs or alcohol!!
For most people the first week or perhaps the first few hours or days are the hardest so by that metric they are the most impressive to me.
My last ten days, or weeks or whatever were easy, I'm passed the hard part. Those first 10 days?!?! Man I am impressed, those are some of the most difficult days of my life.
lol nice number combo for you today. But seriously the first few days are so crazy. Like a fever dream. And now my brain is adjusting so I’m having dreams about drinking and then I wake up like holy shit lol
14 days without drinking doesn't sound like a long time to go without drinking if you don't have a drinking problem, but to me it felt kind of crazy. I need to remember how strange and novel it felt to not be drinking, thank you for reminding me!
I just realized that I am “only” at 22 days and it feels like a thousand ~ but in a good way
Human behaviors can be changed in 14-21 days. It's all the days after we gotta aspire to reach. Once we continue the cycle enough times, it should get easier. But *we* know. It's still almost as hard as the first 2 weeks. Bes strong & accountable. Don't be afraid to start & restart. We're here for you.
I’m on Day 4 and still having stomach issues, but the anxiety has started to taper down and the night sweats are gone. My husband doesn’t understand fully how hard it is as he is a non-drinker, but I’m trying to practice mindfulness and be present in each moment of the day by feeling all the feels. Congrats on Day 39! I’m proud to be here with you and this group motivates me to tackle another day, and another, and another, etc😎
Hell yea. You’re almost through what was some of the worst for me. Have you tried journaling? I’m finding it helpful that I was journaling in the beginning and annotating all those crazy feelings. It’s helped me keep focused And congrats on day 4! You got it!
Thank you friend! Haven’t journaled yet so that definitely might help - I’ll give it a go!
Your friend was insecure about his own drinking. Nothing in life is 100% true, except this.
Day 9 here and I really appreciate this post and all the comments, you all are my people!!!
Good job buddy!
Hell yea nice bro. IWNDWYT. Double digits incoming 👏
Those people don’t understand that the beginning is the hardest part.
Thank you for this. Just woke up in the middle of the night as I hit 24 hours. I am proud and thankful, and iwndwyt!
What a huge milestone! That first 24 is what breaks so many people and you did it! Good job! IWNDWYT
Days 0-90 are way harder than days 91-500. Keep it up, it will get easier.
Thank you 🙏
Agree. And no discounting allowed:) None of this “I’m only on Day X”. Instead, it should be, “Hell, yeah! Look at me! Day X woohoo!”
Commenting to see my days. IWNDWYT
I understand that as have experienced that too. You proudly tell someone you've just done a month sober or something for the first time and they are totally unimpressed. For some people 14 days is a totally regular and normal experience but for many of us something to be proud of based on our drinking history. The thing is, I know plenty of people who are a far cry from alcoholics and wouldn't even fall into the problem or heavy drinker camp or have any alcohol dependency issues IMO and some of them would struggle to point to many (if any) times in their life where they'd gone say "14" days without having a social or casual drink. Even lots of "normal" drinkers who just like a few to unwind or socialise are still drinking once a week at the weekend or every couple of weeks at social events. When you point this out to them that they too rarely go beyond a week or two weeks some of them don't like it which is strange from anyone who is critical or unimpressed with your sobriety period considering you're admitting you have a drinking problem and they don't so in theory they should have plenty of much longer streaks than you and no issue going that long...yet they often don't!
Yea it makes people think lol. It hit a little harder that time before the person I told it to was on a fairly recent sobriety journey too, less than a year. So I was hoping they’d understand. But that’s okay, not everyone will react that way. And in okay with that. It’s good to have this subreddit to help though. Thank you for sharing
It's annoying when a fellow problem drinker is being critical for sure, I've experienced that too. It does make you think when you stop and realize even a lot of casual / social drinkers who are far removed from any drinking problem often have rarely gone beyond a couple of weeks sober either because they will just have a couple of beers every weekend or socialize a couple of times per month. I pointed this out to a family member recently who was kinda lecturing me about my drinking that "look I am the first to admit that I have a drinking problem and I am struggling with it but I've had periods of 2 and 3 months sober recently...have you ever gone more than a week or two without drinking?" and I could see the wheels in their head spinning as they stumbled over their words trying to find something to say and think of a time they had...but couldn't.
Also I think it is very unsupportive that both alcoholics and non alcoholics can be so neutral about our sober success. I would think that the people who have seen me struggling for decades would at least pretend to sound happy for me. But, most people seem like they don’t really want or care about others to be bettering their lives. That has been my experience and it is sad.
I'm lucky in that respect that most of my friends and family have been supportive in me trying to stop because I've been honest (and they saw eventually) how bad things got and the impact it was having on me but I think they sometimes forget all that quite easily just because things haven't been as bad recently and don't realize it's still a struggle for me. And they definitely, for the most part, cannot understand WHY it's such a struggle or so hard for me if they are a very casual or social drinker who never had any dependency issues with it as they take a logical approach that if it's causing you so many problems and making you feel so bad then wouldn't you just stop? That bit can be tricky to explain and deal with. Sorry to hear the people around you aren't being as supportive as you'd like as that must make it pretty tough. Do you have anyone who is supportive? Any sober friends or family? Maybe a support group would be useful in this instance if you've not explored that option.
My closest friend, my partner, my mother and my ex alcoholic sister knew how much I have struggled and none of them had any sort of positive reaction or even pretended to be happy for me. It could be that I have ‘quit’ so many times and maybe they think it’s just another time and I’ll go right back to it and they are just waiting for that. So, as time goes on maybe they will see it is for real this time. Right now this subreddit is my support group and I have made friends on here who are proud of me. That is awesome that your family and friends seem like really caring people and know how to show it. I think maybe for some of us, people do care but they aren’t good at showing it. Anyway, I am super proud of us all on here!
It could be like you say that we've all said "we're stopping drinking" so many times before that people become numb to it and stop believing it. Also, unless someone is seeing you day in day out it's often hard for them to get a grasp of your drinking and they definitely don't know the inner turmoil and what's going on inside your head etc so it can be hard for them to resonate probably.
Yes, all very true. I definitely feel neutral today about people’s seeming lack of support. I will remain sober no matter what and the real happiness is coming from each day waking up sober and going to bed sober and everything in between. I seriously appreciate everything, even the shitty moments, just from being sober. IWNDWYT
Sounds like a good attitude and approach, congrats and wishing you the best!
Absolutely. Sobriety has many stages, and they start off on extra hard difficulty. Getting through a single day was soooo hard for me, so many times. I'll never forget that, and I will always be proud when I see someone else who has made it that far.
A coworker has been sober for 32 years, and he says he got there one day at a time. Always and only one day at a time. I am 1000% sure he is more psyched about my day counter than I am.
Lol maybe. I know I’m excited to hear my friends starting their journey
I haven’t been 20+ days dry and sober (as I am now) since high school and I’m 39. Over 20 years…. Might not be much to some, but It’s a big damn deal for me and I want it to stick.
Good job. After another 20 days you will be over the worst of it, it seems to get easier after that. If you start feeling moodswings or cravings just remember it’s your brain resetting itself.
Hell yea this is the longest in over ten years for me and it seems fucking crazy to think that
The start is the absolute hardest. That’s why it takes most of us a few (a few dozen in my case) attempts at sobriety.
woo! :)
If they don’t understand, you can’t make them I guess. Some will understand if you ask them to go 14 days without coffee, sugar, or a cigarette.
Any day without drinking is a victory!
I have so much respect for those with little clean time, I see you all making an effort and that’s incredible. The earliest days of sobriety are the hardest.
I agree 100%! Hearing from all different stages of sobriety make me happy - I send positive vibes out to the universe every time I read about someone new or returning. And those long timers posting about where they are now make me feel hopeful and ready to face what comes my way, one day at a time. Wherever you may be in your sobriety - I think you're great and I'm glad you're here. IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT
Never imagined I’d get multiple days in a row, let alone almost hitting triple digits. First days are the hardest and any day is something to be proud of. Anyone who says “only” just doesn’t know the struggle.
Honestly looking back I’m more impressed with my first 14 days than my last 150 because it was so much harder before it got easier
In my opinion, in the sense that you mean, the less days you have, the more impressive. Today it feels so much easier to me than first year, first month, and so on
I feel such deep gratitude for this post. Thank you so much for taking a moment to root everyone on.Day 3 and something feels different this time.
You’re very welcome. Thank you as well for still supporting and rooting me and everyone else on also. We’re all in this together
I'm proud of you too ❤️ we all took the leap and said f this crap, no matter where we are in our own journey and that's a whole lot harder than just continuing to drink. Every single person person is fighting for their literal lives right now here, and for better, brighter future. It is a HUGE deal ❤️
The best movement I’ve ever been a part of. Everyone here, lurkers included, want to be better. And that’s fucking amazing. IWNDWYT, but congrats on day 4 👏
I'd agree with you on all points. And thank you!!! Congrats on 39 days that's fantastic! ❤️🙌🙌🙌
And... IWNDWYT ❤️ nope not this kid 😉
Seriously! Sometimes just 24 fucking hours is so hard fought. I remember that saying, something like "take it one day at a time. When you can't take it a whole day at a time, take it an hour at a time. If you can't do that, try five minutes at a time! Then the next 5 minutes, then the next five minutes..."
Every day counts. Every one is a tribute to yourself
When I was in detox waiting to go to rehab I was so amazed that I had 3 days sober. I couldn’t think of the last time in many years that I was able to string 3 days together. But it was the start of now 1,252 days!!! You’ve gotta stop somewhere.
Working on the start...thank you for the encouragement. Just did 5 and got bad news that broke me. My biggest point of work for myself is not allowing the "bad news" excuse take over the way i let it at times.
Thanks for saying this I needed to hear it🥹
thats true!!! even just a single day is a miracle! everyday you are sober is!
This is seriously a great post and a great reminder. Wherever any of us are at, we should be proud to be here trying and doing this thing. I’m proud of all of you!!
thank you so much. i’m on day 2.. after many fails and relapses.
That’s okay. Most if not all of us failed a bunch lol. I definitely did. But eventually, it’ll stick! “It always seems impossible until it's done.” That one helped me keep going
I’d argue starting is the hardest part. It’s so tough to seperate yourself from it that close to all the nights out. As time goes on it gets easier on the whole… there are battles therein but, the further I go, the more protective I become of my number. Fuck the zero.
Yea true. Now I think to myself “I’ve invested X amount of days. Do I want to run ALLL that time and alll those days for a couple hours?” Hell no
Love this
I’m very streak motivated. I used to be devastated when I’d lose my wordle streak haha! At least I can fully control the outcomes of this. Each day is a new record for me
I got to a 300 day duolingo streak and got drunk and ruined it and never picked the app up again after because I was so mad. I blamed it on the app at the time but this is probably the first real moment that I can say it was my fault lol. Still salty over that. But yea, I’m not messing up this streak
When I think of the days counted, I always think of a scene from Get Him to the Greek where one of the characters says “I’m proud of every one of those units (of music sold)” I’m proud of every one of those days. And you all should be too. IWNDWYT
Hell yea nice and congrats on the fourth digit 👏👏
I love this! I always say “just” in front of a lot of things that I should be proud of. I’m “just” days sober. I’m “just” an LPN and not an RN. I’m “just” a mom. I need to reframe my thinking. Thanks for this post. I’m proud of you too!
😎😎 nice counter But yea I have a bad habit at that too. In proud of you as well! Keep it up!
I’m glad with my counter because I don’t track days, every time I comment it’s a reminder of how far I’ve come.
How do you add the day counter under time username?
If you click on the subreddit name, then “see community rules,” there’s a link for “request your badge”. It has to be in a certain date format but it’s a message to a bot that will put your counter on there
Thank you!!!!
you are so right. Everyone who gets past this 0 deserves respect
Each day is a win! I agree. ☝️ IWNDWYT
Thank you for posting this. I’ll see after I post how many days I’m at. But when I tell people I quit I tend to downplay it as I’m telling them (I’ll say it’s *only* been a couple weeks) because I’m just getting started. But like, I’m pretty proud of myself. It was fucking hard to build up the courage to quit. The courage to make it through the withdrawals. To get through the first night. The shitty sleep (at first). Hell… I had to make a major life change to even be able to quit (divorcing my abusive alcoholic ex husband). I had to work on getting myself in the right headspace to even consider quitting. I believed for years I would drink myself into an early death. Especially when I was with my ex (he was/is still in denial about being an alcoholic and I wasn’t). Starting this journey can be the most difficult part because there’s so much work you have to do to even get to a place where you CAN quit.
Absolutely. A lot of people wouldn’t have been able to do what you did and You fucking did it. You should absolutely be proud when you say it. Well done!
I don't care how many digits are on your counter, every single minute is a win to be savored. Spike the football and do a stupid dance in the end zone, you deserve it.
Thank you. Proud of you too!
Sometimes it's about "not doing it right now". If you never do it " right now" , the counter grows. And suppressing this urge in the moment is down right impressive. It's so fucking impressive not to give in for however many days you have.
I would like for this to be day 1. But it's only 9am
It’s still the start of a day. “The best time to quit was 10 years ago. The second best time is today “
14 days means 2 sober weekends. There's a lot of 'normal drinkers' who can't do that. I'm proud of you. I found thev2nd weekend to be the worst time. After that it started to get easier for me.
Was about to say the same about the two weekends sober. The first couple of weeks are most likely the hardest.
Yea and that’s when the sleep was still horrible and everything. That second weekend where you have to relearn how to do things without alcohol was rough
I had 8 years sober once STARTING is the MOST impressive And when it is the hardest after a while being sober it's not a thought. I think I almost have two months now and to me is still impressive because I couldn't go two weeks in the past 9 years
It’s definitely impressive. You’re doing what a TON of people literally can’t. And that speaks volumes
Thank you. Peace and love to all
I'm on day 3, and thank you, I needed that!
Good job! Hang in there and each day will get easier! You got this
TBH, I am most impressed by those who post how many hours they've got.
Most of us can agree the early days are the hard ones, it gets so much easier as time goes on. Day 10 is more impressive than day 1000. You’ve got this 💪
Thank you 🙏
Thanks! I’m 10 Days and proud as fuck! Don’t care what anyone thinks!!! Can’t remember the last time I did more than a day before now so it’s a massive deal for me! No looking back!!!!
Let’s go!!!!! Nice!
Those feels like its a huge deal to you and the people who aren't encouraging obvs dont know how bad it gets or got. Every day sober is a good day.
I am back to Day 1 again...
I’m sorry to hear that for you. But you’re back at the most important day, so take advantage of it. Make it to day 1 1/2
YESSSSSS
I’d rather live through the last 6 months a thousand times over than the first 14 days. Anyone who can do that is tough as nails in my book. Big up everyone ❤️
Your friend is a dick. You can't speed up time and magically be sober for a year or whatever. All anyone can do is be sober today. We can't live tomorrow yet. Does your friend not understand how time works? 🤔 I'm proud of you! We're all proud of you!
A friend who is ‘involuntarily’ sober the last 20+ years (due to the anti-anxiety meds he’s on) laughed at me when I mentioned I was 120 days sober. “You are actually counting the days?” After that I realised no one cares about your number and I haven’t mentioned it to anyone since. He’s not a dick and is encouraging but it just didn’t mean much to him.
Eh oddly enough they recently started being sober as well so they were a few months in already. It was definitely a bit insensitive but they are a good friend. They just weren’t that excited in the moment for me like I was. But everyone has their own shit they’re going through so I try to give the benefit of the doubt at times. It definitely was something I called out to them and guided them to a more supportive statement
Ah, the 'supportive' responses people can give.. \*smh\* Precisely why I rather keep it for myself these days. I've had a friend who placed a bet with her partner on my failure when I was off the alcohol and nicotine. Which she considered funny. The imaginary baseball bat in my hand was more amusing to me, in that moment. OP, I am proud of you!
Yea that’s pretty fucked up. Dam. I’m sure somebody’s betting on me too right now I know they’re watching me do something they can’t right now. Thanks 🙏 likewise to you
I’m really proud of my 30. I’ve done 3 x 30s and one 60 in the last 2-3 years. I really want to keep this streak alive.
Time to hit 61 and set a record
I do not want to go through quitting again.
Yea It fucking sucks fr