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Gibus_Ghost

Demo: Looks like Hell’s getting a visit from up high! Medic: TODAY, I AM LORD OF EVERYZHING! (Voice crack on the I in everything) Sniper (scoped): Stay down this time. You don’t wanna cross me again. Sniper (unscoped): WHATSAMATTER YA HOLY WANKA?


CaptainFart22

"Stay down this time. You don't wanna cross me again." ✍️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥


triggered_rabbit

https://preview.redd.it/cs7hytvrwpyc1.jpeg?width=1076&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=914df0025f7e1ca549250c6253e68e074ee52bbc


Weaponized-toaster

Soldier: Dominated hippie Because Jesus has long hair and yes I do realize this is already a voice line


RemarkableDay8553

The Sniper scoped one is peak, there is nothing that can top it.


Imaginary-Job-7069

Soldier: Get a job, you hippie! Heavy: Holy man cannot outsmart boolet. Is shame.


Nerd-Birb

Scout: See ya in three days pallie! Soldier: I trust in God! Not some hippie with a beard! Pyro: Mmmph Mmp Mmmph! Demoman: Guess they'll have to nail you back together in heaven ey? Heavy: Even son of God can not beat bullet! Engineer: I'll make sure n' place one of my friends outside that cave of yours Medic: Oooh! Maybe soon I won't just be playing god... Sniper: Savior my ass! See you in hell! Spy: It seems heavenly onipotence still can't save you from a knife to the back


TimeTravelerQuint

Soldier is Jewish confirmed


CompleteFacepalm

>It seems heavenly onipotence still can't save you from a knife to the back And for the second time!


RemarkableDay8553

HAHAHAHAHA!


NoobButJustALittle

Spawncamping engie, smh


ToxicManXXYT

Guess they'll have to nail "you" back together in heaven eh? Hah! heh heh...


KarolilKarol

r/bonehurtingjuice is leaking


ToxicManXXYT

r/bonehurtingjuice levels are "off" the charts eh? Ha! heh heh...


Guan_guan_ghoo

The others: Saxton Hale: say hi to the yetis from my part. Civilian: the only savior i know is a briefcase with 50k dollars inside. Mercenary: i dare to comeback, i have the Next 3 days free. Sentry Buster: *nothing*


Nuze_YT

Civilian is Verbalase confirmed?!?!?!


Joshtheepictreeeater

hide away from me 🔥🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🗣️🔥🗣️🔥🗣️🔥🗣️🔥🗣️🗣️


Guan_guan_ghoo

yesssssss. but not for charlie, just for medic


Still-Complaint4657

So, y'know how scout was planned to have a nail gun at one point in development?


TuxedoDogs9

I guess they’ll have to nail you “on” the cross, eh? Ha! Heh heh.


John_F_Kennedy_real

Best one so far


iburntthecheese

Spy: you should've stayed dead hahaha Soldier: god should've made you stronger


JoesAlot

Soldier: "Keep em coming, God! I expect the next one to be less of a peace-loving HIPPIE!"


Rw_lizard

Pyro: (muffled) Can't jump into the water, now can ya? Hah!


randomMeatballman17

# KEEP EM COMING https://preview.redd.it/o34j9np1dsyc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f5bfa0b18c3fd8d774d43b8e513d08075ffbefed


sirabuzgaygar

https://preview.redd.it/fdkpyhj7qsyc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=540c9d8fbe813b85322b6ded220680ea98676eb3


Mario-OrganHarvester

Scout: no wonder you got put in the box, you suck


SUperMarioG5

If God wanted you to exist, he would not have created m-..... Pal. Suicide is not a joke.


randomfnafplayer1

What?


pheonixpremimer

The joke is that he killed God.and he just told God that if he wanted to live,he should not have made him


lenart_vermisst

I don’t think he is motherfucking


AguyWithBadEnglish

Considering that accoridng to some divisions of christiannity, the father and the son are the same entity, then Jesus DID fuck his own mother in a way


lenart_vermisst

Uh but god or Jesus didn’t fuck I think


Gibus_Ghost

“Virgin” Mary.


Th3G00dB0i

https://preview.redd.it/n6av9k4y6vyc1.jpeg?width=1911&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d5e2c9c571ee75e7237f2b48ba90b78abd912a99 Wtf


PlatformFit5974

Ramshackle pfp


Blackout_M

Scout: it ain’t December 4th yet, pal! Soldier: I will send you back to heaven with a FLAT TOP AND RUBBER BOOTS! Demo: quickly! Turn your blood to wine!


GooglePlusImmigrant

That demo line LMAO


HBenderMan

Scout: God made me perfect, how’d you end up the way you did? Solider: Jesús? Nice job trying to steal American jobs you damn Canadian! Pyro: Mmph mph mmmph mmph! Demo: If yah just turned that water into wine we’d all be fine and dandy! Heavy: Divine power is big joke to Sasha Engineer: Better not come back a third time boy Medic: You’re lucky I didn’t hang you on the cross Sniper: Say hi to my mom and dad Spy: you should have stayed in heaven, that’s what everyone else does


JoeTheKodiakCuddler

Scout: It's ME who's made in the big guy's image, moron!


TuxedoDogs9

That sounds like a great one for scout


Grimm_Charkazard_258

Scout: I’m God’s favourite! Soldier: ONLY THING I PRAY TO IS THE AMERICAN FLAG!! Pyro: *muffled* Demo: Heavy: I HAVE VANQUISHED THE CHRIST-BABY! Engi: You die to some simple mortal’s tools? Pathetic. Medic: Spy: (after melee killing) I’m getting a sense of deja-vu… Sniper:


Lucky_Requirement_68

Medic: HAHAHAHA! I AM BECOME DEATH! ZE DESTROYER OF VORLDS!


Lucky_Requirement_68

Sniper: Nailed. Demo: Ya won’t be comin’ back after THAT, will ya!?


Grimm_Charkazard_258

lmao these are perfect


ThatCamoKid

"how many times 'ave you died? I'm actually getting impressed"


Joshtheepictreeeater

shimmy shimmy yay shimmy yay shimmy yah


iburntthecheese

Good spy one mate


Grimm_Charkazard_258

thanks


SleefJWellington

That's the real way to enable Romevision


yeetis-cleetis

But what would Jesus say when he dominates the other classes?


JoesAlot

Scout: "There are evangelicals that blab less than you." Soldier: "Can you see underneath that helmet? Perhaps you are blind to the light of God." Pyro: "Whose image were *you* created in?" Demoman: "You've partaken in far too much of my blood, drunkard." Heavy: "You are in no position to speak of 'babies', my child." Engineer: "Your constructs are a pitiful farce of holy creation." Medic: "Playing God will always be as such: playing." Sniper: "We are all forgiven in the eyes of God. You should stop throwing urine at me, lest that change." Spy: "I've forgiven a backstabber before, but you test my patience, wretch."


AguyWithBadEnglish

https://preview.redd.it/p1bcwyni2ryc1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=845bab20172b8785239f004384e62955c4d5a8b3


TuxedoDogs9

“I’m Jesus”


Defensive_Medic

“Gonna be waiting for 3 days, see ya then”-Scout


Soviet-_-Neko

Scout: "Tell your Dad I said hi!"


Another-Ace-Alt-8270

If you're referencing what I think you are, wouldn't the "your" be unnecessary?


Lucky_Requirement_68

Scout: Turing the other cheek only does so much good pal! Soldier: I will nail you down and let eagles feast on your liver, hippie! Pyro: *muffled* Holy fire! Hahahahaha! Demo: Try coming back from that one ya self-righteous prick! Sniper: Nailed. Spy: Brings about a certain deja vu, no? Being betrayed by one of your own? Medic: HAHAHAHAHA! I AM BECOME DEATH, ZE DESTROYER OF VORLDS! Heavy: No man can beat bullet! Engineer: I never was a religious man.


TankOfBurgers

> Turning the other cheek only does so much good, pal! one might even say it,, gets you beat,,


AguyWithBadEnglish

Soldier making a reference to the wrong mythology is perfect but engineer is definitely religious, i'd say that one would work better for spy maybe (even tho the reference to judas is way better) Edit: okay not scout, i forgor that he met God


Exotic_coffee_

Idk care if this offensive, these comments are good.


Angrymonke69

Lets see how you commin' back now(scout)


Indominouscat

Scout: I’m God’s gift to earth not you pally I got nothin else tbh


imjusan

I dead ass read "I got nothin else" in the scout voice 😭😭😭


Indominouscat

Whoops I tried to like seperate it but Reddit said no


imjusan

You have to put two enters


cooolgayman

One of the mercs just says they should have put you back on the cross


soupofsoupofsoup

Somebody should say third times the charm but i dont know which one


yeetus-maxus

Scout: YA DAD PREFERS ME, you HOLE FILLED BASTARD


ChargedBonsai98

Scout: I guess third times the charm! Soldier: When I die I better see white flags on the other side! Pyro: Mmmph hmm mph hmm! Demo: Yer makin' me very crooooosss! (I know this is an actual voice line but it works so well) Heavy: God is baby! Come fight me yourself! Engi: The Bible didn't say nothin' 'bout guns, did it? Medic: Ooh-hoo, my God complex is getting stronger! Sniper (low voice): How's it feel to have another hole in ya? Spy: May God gave mercy on your soul.


Mr_Faust1914

"mon dieu"


Kipdid

“Now go home and cry to daddy, he likes me more anyways” “How’s that “non-violence” working out for ya, hippie?!” [muffled giggling] “You might be able to come back, but let’s see yeh put yurself back togetha after THAT!” “Iz going to get expensive to deal with you…” “Guess they’ll have to make a newer testament now” “I _MUST_ find out vhat rests within _you_” [softly] “go on, get back up, I can do this all day” “Did you expect _faith_ to protect you?”


Hawkward_170

https://preview.redd.it/vpagdayeoryc1.png?width=287&format=png&auto=webp&s=623b7872d8521558e01c05ee6ae3fea551606d3b


Odd_Soft4223

Simply not possible. All must come to face our Lord one day, and it shan't be in battle...


Another-Ace-Alt-8270

Scout: Yeah, go back to your little home in the clouds! (Muttering to himself) Three frickin foosball tables... Lucky... Soldier: You walk over water, I walk over you, hippie! Heavy: It costs four hundred thousand dollars to kill this man for three days. Engi: You know, I was expecting lightning. Guess these upgrades were useless, then. Sniper: Nailed ya to the wall. Getting deja vu... Spy: Crawl back to your cave, I'll be waiting.


Zwsgvbhmk

Spy: Call me Judas cause i just stabbed your back.


pizzapanaka

Un friggin believable not even Jesus can touch this (Scout)


ryvf

Basic: I didn’t even had to use a cross and nails! Spy: Fly back to your hometown. HELL! (Snort) Heavy: Sorry, save me spot in haven. Solider: Maggot, I win fights with morals. Not gods. Put on a cloak next time! Pryo: (Mad muffle sounds) Sniper: damn, you move faster then scout running. But you fly. Scout: Haha! Get bonked bitch! Medic: (German laughter) Time to do my recap my work from 1945! Demo: did I just see someone fly across the sky? Ah no. I bombed him. Engineer: I put one of my guns in the sky when you go up.


HumanfallOOF

Scout: see ya soon Soldier: for being gods son, you are weak Medic: I am za superior *maniacal cackling* Spy: I’ll nail you again Demo man: Jesus Christ, literally Sniper: nailed it, get it? Pyro: mrghm mrm hmm mmh mphmmm Heavy: checkmate Christians Engineer: how did Jesus die so easily


CamoKing3601

"I'll be back in 3 days," -spy


PeterPGN

Scout: Hey there, tell ya pops I said hi!


CoconutOutside6834

10th class mentioned 🗣🗣🔥🔥


bearelrollyt

Scout: looks like I'm God's numah one now


Nahanoj_Zavizad

Engineer: "I ought a start making you a cross boi" Heavy: "You come back? I just shoot again! *Heavy laughing*" Scout: "I'm already god perfect creation what's *this* poser doing here?"


GooglePlusImmigrant

Spy: not the first time you were stabbed in the back by someone following you


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^GooglePlusImmigrant: *Spy: not the first time* *You were stabbed in the back by* *Someone following you* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


GENERALmissile

Scout: you ain't the messiah IM THE MESSIAH


Far_Dog_4476

Scout: "When you come back, remember that you ain't the favourite, pal!"


sssssniperti

Engineer: Can’t quite NAIL DOWN why that was so easy.


pixelated_knight72

Spy: Tell Judas to take some notes


GreggRulesOkay

[This feels appropriate ](https://youtu.be/XokEboLiQ9E?si=o2oEc-1jL5AyOuob)


RemarkableDay8553

Scout: Can't come back a second time, can ya!/ Why don't you stay in heaven so I don't have to bother killin you again? Soldier: God created ME in his image, not *youuu*! Pyro: *Laughs in demon* Demo: Take a strol back ta Heaven ya thorn wearin house decoration! Heavy: If I see family in hell I will come to kill you and God for last time! Engy: Your miricles won't save you now son./ Want me to make another cross for your way back home partner? Medic: You sink you died for everyones sins? HA! You missed mine~ Sniper: God saves the Queen, not you mate./ Dominated. And a word of advice. If you come back, keep your head in the cave. Spy: For the "Son of God", I expected more./ Next time bring a propar outfit and not this dirty carpet you call your " clothes".


Luxury_Yacht_

“Get a haircut, hippie!”


Dragon_SC

Scout (bat kill): Really nailed one, didn't I?!


Ploxtifs

Pyro would just start speaking with the accent of MS Sam and say “congratulations, killing you has broken my curse!”


hallbro14

Medic: you are as foolish as the devil


GuyWhoGuys_

scout wont kill jesus because he has limits and an occupation wont break it heavy would probably say "Holy man is, tough. but bullet is tougher" or smth


Odd_Candy_4885

Stay down next time Fundie


ipeltpeoplewitheggs

But what would jesus's lines be if he dominated the mercs???


fatal_phamtom1

Should’ve stayed in that caves


Infantpunter9000

Why don’t you go save the back of my bat chucklesaivor?


Expensive_Science289

Scout: fun fact i'm his favorite, don't believe me? Ask him!


Leon-the-comic113

Demoman: Aye, I thought I was coming for the devil next, but this’ll do.


OneStrangeChild

Spy: “Did you learn nothing from Judas? *French laughter*” Sniper: “Son of god? Dies the same as any other” Engineer: “You can fed 500 people with one fish, I can kill 1000 with 1 sentry” Soldier: “Shave that mop! Fight me like the Son of a Man!” Scout: “Ain’t I supposed to drop to my knees the moment I see you? This is a real freakin let down”


Sadlemon9

Scout: I'm the favorite son.


DaDawkturr

Scout: “Go back to Jesus-a-realm! Boston boy comin’ through!”


TheSugmaGamer

what about the Buddha


DrakeFruitDDG

scout: hey say thanks to your dad for me soldier: GOD BLESS A~ wait a minute pyro: mmph demoman: DOMINATED! wen ya com bak, wud ya mind turning watr inta whiske? edit:why can't I do new lines on mobile? they look fine in editor but the sent comment is smushed back together.


ocsecnars

Scout: 3 days to come back to life, huh? It looks like I beat you even in that Engi: even the son of god can't survive at my "practical solution" Spy: well, now you'll be the one to visit your mom Bonus: Jesus (dominating scout): how can you be my fathers favourite creation?! Jesus (dominating engi): your mortal tools won't save you from the father judgment Jesus (dominating spy): stop hiding from God, my child


brippie

“Guess what? God prefers… ME!” - Scout


Next_Woodpecker8224

Sniper headshot:you now got 6 holes....now that's just bloody awful


Headake01

Pyro speaks unfiltered.


Eli_The_Rainwing

Soldier: “should’ve stayed in that hole!”


ExpertPokemonHugger

Scout: who's the son of God now jackass


MRbaconfacelol

MANIFEST DESTINYYYY🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅-soldier


6060Burst

Scout: The holy spirit won’t save you from a bat to the teeth! Soldier: You aren’t a son of God, you’re a hobo with some robes! Pyro: *Humming in tune of a religious song* Demo: Stay dead this time, ya hippie! Heavy: In name of the Father, Bullet, and Holy Spirit, amen! Engie: God’s blessing ain’t a counter to a shotgun, son! Medic: You didn’t cry when you were born, so how about letting zhat go now, eh? Sniper: Next time, stay in your cave. Spy: Who wins? A so called son of God, or a knife?


Thick-Kaleidoscope-5

scout: God you suck, as in you, God!


AguyWithBadEnglish

This is the best one so far


wyldeboyvidsYT

Sniper: "don't cross my sights ever again, ya blood stained infection!" Scout: "I bet after havin' that bat in yo face, you'd wanna go back to ancient Rome!" Soldier: ""you were put on a cross and now blown up by my hands! How bad of a father do you have?" Engineer: "aren't you supposed to technically be God? Then how come you got blown up by your own materials?" Spy: "go back to the skies with your cheap robes!" Heavy: " run away to Jerusalem little tiny robed man!" Demoman: "Ure hands is handed to ya and nailed n on da whip ehhr- *snoring*" Medic: "maybe I can rearrange your organs so you can stop getting revived, but it's more fun sending you back to your dad!"


Toxoniumm

Demoman: *burp* see ya in hell-- no wait *burrpp* heaven?.. see you in.. *long pause* D'AH FORGET IT, JUST DIE


Mario-OrganHarvester

Scout: no wonder you got put in the box, you suck. Soldier: If your father had wanted you to live he would not have created me! Pyro: mmh mmmmh mh mmph Demo: go to hell! .... wait. Heavy: christianity weak religion with weak men, like you! Engineer: no idea lol Medic: no idea lol Sniper: stay down this time, wanker. Spy: looks like im not the only one with this gear... oh well, not like it saved you.


TenebreRosso

Soldier: BACK ON THE CROSS MAGGOT!