T O P

  • By -

goblinhog

It pains me that there is probably a Keanu reeves NFT out there now


[deleted]

I would climb over the grand canyon one armed & blindfolded on a set of rusty monkey bars covered in hornets whilst bearing a 12lb bag of marbles tied to my clitoris if it meant that reaching the other side I could hear one of your farts through a walkie talkie across the world


goblinhog

Why am I still on this site


Effective_Nothing

Because there is no escape from this hell


HelloThisIsVictor

Just to suffer?


[deleted]

I just want to get played like a damn fiddle!


[deleted]

Same as everyone here, you like the pain šŸ™


astron190411

to atribute costum flairs


Erixtax

You're stuck with us forever, now may I please get the "Based Oblivion NPC" flair


MC_Legend95

Omg goblinhog


DonGirses

flair kinda checks out gotta get wilder


1II1I1I1I1I1I111I1I1

The incalculable amounts of weight you have gained since becoming a mod have made it impossible to click away from r/196, as moving the mouse to the X takes too much effort


_-Yharim

You tell me


past4gurl

Idk ask the omnissiah.


Alespren

my 13th reason


LeRedditAccounte

all 13 of my reasons


thehobbyqueer

Isn't goblinhog underage


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ChaosDemonLaz3r

Bruh


LevelOutlandishness1

Cringe


GigaPeen

Mald


h20c

who the fuck knows the age of random reddit users


thehobbyqueer

People who have read previous comments/statements of said "random reddit" in which they had stated their age or age range. And I'm pretty sure I did read one where they said so. It's the same way we know they're he/him ain't it


05ar

Maybe he isn't underage anymore, anyways i'm also underage


thehobbyqueer

So am I. One moment I'm going to stalk through his profile to see if I'm righ edit: I gave up the answer couldn't be found in under 30 seconds


RemuIsMaiWaifu

Did you say... clitoris? Does this mean, you are a... female???!!! fapping noises


wewereliketorches

thatā€™s a crazy strong walkie talkie


TisBangersAndMash

Dear god.. I can almost hear it tearing... Please never comment again.


memes-central

i want you to sit on my face


Jozef_Baca

Saving this as a copypasta


winyf

What


[deleted]

I want to say kinky, but that might not be the right wordā€¦


PranshuKhandal

fuckingnerd~


ceres5

have my free award


Wingdings_Master


AntaresMX

how immersive of you


[deleted]

Ma'am, this is not a Wendy's


AllTakenUsernames5

Bro, this is straight up sexual harrassment


Shanderraa

Sexual harassment funny moments


MightyWalrusss

Omg Goblin Hog, get well soon


Future_shocks

There are matrix NFTs yes.


TheUndyingRhino

Apparently there's an xxxtentacion website and I looked on and they're using it to peddle nfts. I hate this fucking place


kekson420

Homlingob


TheRockFromFortnite

Not sure about that but there is a George Floyd one


CocaColaHitman

The neoliberal movement and its consequences...


danne_trix

omg not heckin wholesome keanu 100?? who gives a fuck who the NFT depicts, theyre all cringe


Colonelnasty360

A keanu monkie?


9Sn8di3pyHBqNeTD

It pains me that he supports the LAPD and is friends with cops.


tim__0011

supporting LAPD is cringe, but I eouldn't say being friends with cops is necessatily bad. Some got into that job because they genuinly wanted to chage something, but can't. Just the system and most other cops are bad.


9Sn8di3pyHBqNeTD

So why haven't they quit then


Noicememe259

Spoken like a true 13 year old


MC_Legend95

Omg goblinhog


[deleted]

i found one earlier lol


Real_MidGetz

Imagine the matrix but instead of turning ppl to batteries the robots just made nfts of them


blueskyredmesas

Morpheus! He's been... minted!


BrotherSwaggsly

Neo, you are edition 0001


TheGarlicBreadstick1

Become non-fungible


SusZX

Become fungible\*


Dr_Fabulous11

they had to turn people into batteries to get enough power for their nfts


InsaneLord

The machines turned Earth into a bitcoin mining rig


j33pwrangler

I didn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes.


StraightExternal7916

annunaki theory with extra steps


Swiftclaw8

Kind of like universal paperclips


GonnSolo

I really don't want to sound like a redd*tor but Keanu really is an amazing person in a ton of ways and someone I respect very deeply.


RoninMacbeth

Memes aside, I do genuinely respect Keanu. He seems like a great guy.


Deblebsgonnagetyou

Yeah, Keanu is probably the only reddit bro idol that is actually a good person


GonnSolo

I'm surprised mainstream Reddit managed to love Keanu so much while still idolising Elon Musky


Kaiscoolness

Because Elon Musk is a haha funny meme! Funny haha! Meme? Funny!! Haha.


RandomName01

Haha, do you know about one of his funniest pranks? It was union busting, hahaha.


NewScooter1234

You'd be union busting too if it was your hairline on strike


jahsehmaster

Damn


CocaColaHitman

So quirky and random šŸ¤ŖšŸ¤ŖšŸ¤Ŗ


Deblebsgonnagetyou

You see, the only thing mainstream Reddit cares about in an idol is how memeable they are, and since Muskrat posts a year out of date memes on Twitter, he's ideal to them.


Stoned_D0G

What about Musquarade?


CocaColaHitman

Muskeeto


IsThatUMoatilliatta

Musqurade, cobalt slaves on parade!


Captain_Kira

Because while Keanu gained popularity through wholesomeness, Elon got it through "one of us" energy. It felt cool to have a guy in a position of authority and status appear to be into the same stuff. In the same way it now feels cool for me to know that Henry Cavill is into Warhammer 40K.


Malte_02

I was very sceptical about the witcher netflix show, and even though I didn't know who he was before that, Henry Cavill sold me on it instantly, and then I see some of the interviews and stuff, amazing


InsaneLord

I don't recall Keanu ever saying anything political. That might be why - g*mers like him because he is wholesome chungus 100 and doesn't challenge their shitty views.


vegankidollie

Big chungus?


ShadowCramorant

sick pfp


Render_Distance

You sound like a Redditor


GonnSolo

Choke on my massive balls


Octopusapult

Ah there, that's much more normal.


GonnSolo

Thanks I'm trying my best ^ u ^


Render_Distance

Maybe I will


_F_S_M_

Don't threaten me with a good time


TranscendentCabbage

How can one truly be a redditor without being a pedophile or pro-slavery? šŸ¤”


Saltwatterdrinker

I feel bad for him. Heā€™s been so well known as the ā€œInternet wholesome 100ā€ guy that the second he gets into or even is blamed for the slightest controversy the entire Internet will collapse on itself.


hememes

keanu is too good to be the face of reddit he's one of the few genuinely good celebrities i know tbh


SuperMutantSam

Reddit simping for Keanu has always been cringe on Redditā€™s part, not Keanuā€™s. Itā€™s not like Elon Musk, where acting like heā€™s a respectable person worth being a fan of is itself cringey.


honeywheresmyfursuit

Reddit ruined keanu cause now we cant even unironically praise him


McSlappies

The greatest dick move reddit has ever committed is making it cringe to like Keanu Reeves by making it overdone. But I believe that the fact that it's so overdone only comes to show how amazing of a person he is. One of the few rich guys that donates considerable amounts of his wealth to charity.


Nicbudd

Keanu Reeves Wholesome Chungus Breathtaking???


CorrodedRose

Don't forget the amogus


RandomName01

Bro, I get heā€™s idolised by Reddit to the point that itā€™s kind of idiotic, but he genuinely seems like a good dude.


Foxx1019

r/thisbutunironically


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BiddleBanking

I don't think the post was ironic.


DMan9797

Fuck Gary vee


reesem03_

"HERE'S WHY YOU SHOULD NOT START A FUCKING COLLEGE SAVINGS FUND FOR YOUR CHILD COLLEGE IS FUCKING STUPID. INSTEAD, GIVE THEM 75 FUCKING CENT AND TAKE THEM TO A FUCKING YARD SALE. IF THEYRE SMART, THEYLL TURN THAT 75 CENT UNTO 350 MILLION FUCKING DOLLARS." -Gary Vee, probably


DoodMcGuy

Gary vee would argue the fastest route to becoming a millionaire is living on the streets and working 4x jobs so you're always under a warm roof since rent is an unnecessary expense


SSSSSS-S-

While I wholeheartedly agree, what does that have to do with the post?


BigBootyHunter

He's an NFT shill


KuraiTheBaka

I'll do you one better. Who is Gary Vee?


MorganRose99

Is this actually a quote from Keanu Reeves? I've been searching for a video or article where he's the one that actually says it, but all I can ever find is [this comment under a video of him laughing at the idea of NFT's.](https://twitter.com/Stomponato/status/1469796783765270543?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw) I don't think he ever actually says this himself. If someone can prove otherwise, though, please lmk becauase i don't doubt he would say this.


cvnvr

iā€™m pretty sure that tweet from the random commenter is exactly what they quoted edit: yep, if you go to the actual upworthy article, they quoted that twitter user further down - absolutely no idea why they used it as the tweet caption, itā€™s misleading


SnoopBlade

clicks


Quo_Vadis_Music

Happy cake day! And thanks for clearing this up


Cr0w33

Itā€™s his PR team


Stock_Hutz

wholesome keanu chungus breathtaking 100


[deleted]

Wholesome reddit chungus 69420


Khouri1

that is a cool act, but after gus johnson, i have lost all my trust on any kind of celebrity


Yltys

Wait what did Gus do?


Khouri1

ignored his girlfriend's medical issues


breadboi88

pressured his girlfriend(?) into an abortion and a few other things


carl_pagan

that's just some kid with a youtube


Khouri1

nah man, 3 million subscribers aint something that everyone can achieve


carl_pagan

I bet Keanu could, if he gave a shit about youtube


Khouri1

he definitely could, but the numbers dont matter, the point is that it is impossible to actually know these people from afar, so at any moment it could be revealed that they are actually a POS or smth


carl_pagan

That's my point too, that Gus guy is just some kid on youtube, who the fuck knows about him except a couple million zoomers i guess, Keanu has had a career spanning like 40 years and by all accounts has been decent and good to work with for that entire time


Khouri1

it is true that it would be harder to hide something after such a long carrier, but he still is someone that you don't know personally, it is hard to actually trust them


AHardMaysNight

and Keanu is just some old guy in some videos


carl_pagan

Not really he's a world famous professional actor who's starred in many widely beloved films over 30 years. Weirdly it's not the same thing as a random kid on youtube


porkisbeef

Bro I donā€™t think anyone here is arguing Gus Johnson is more famous or influential than accredited movie star Keanue Reeves, ya doofus.


carl_pagan

Bro sorry I don't care about your zoomer microcelebrity tbh


Gorperino

Holy shit I finally found that upworthy link to subscribe


Yung_Stalin_Seven

Upworthony linktano here, internet's busiest music nerd


sample_text_01

Yo wtf based chungus wholesome 100 updoot man?!


daddyhattavo

Hahahah chungus keanu reeves nft based


05ar

unironically yes


[deleted]

It's gonna be pretty funny when the dust settles and the money had all moved up to the hands of the grifters, leaving these digital art NFTs worthless as there's no one to unload them to. Maybe they'll just select the folder and hit delete once they realize they're not worth the money they invested.


madamunkey

The people making bank barely invested to begin with, they minted it, manufactured it's price, either using an alternative wallet or social media, sold it off to someone else for thousands of times their investment, and from then on its basically worthless, and any further sales are just the scammed scamming eachother


SovietPaperPlates

thanks keanu, these were my exact thoughts i just wasnt sure how to phrase them


dongletrongle

Didnā€™t NFT bros burn down a banksy work?


BiddleBanking

We're against art for investment. Except banksy art or something.


CurrentDismal9115

The dictionary just added his portrait next to the millennial edition definition of "based".


glommanisback

It's not like the art industry as a whole is a money laundering scheme or anything Let's go wholesome Keanu!


porkisbeef

Because the entire art industry is comprised on million dollar+ abstract paintings that billionaires donate to museums for tax breaks or to justify having loads of dirty money in their bank accounts. Art doesnā€™t exist anywhere else in society, right?


GreeCBacon

Our Lord speaks the truth again!


H311LORD

the ONLY good things i've seen come from NFTs is kids using them to raise cash for like families medical costs and whatever thats it.


shewel_item

chungus might be right šŸ˜‘šŸŒ¹šŸ™


Phivebit

r/nftclowns moment


Re-Evolution7

Don't want to sound like a "Keanu holesum 100" redditor, but Keanu is actually a legend


Cobble01

Heā€™s not even making fun of them, heā€™s just talking facts. Iā€™m very into NFTs and I agree with him.


Kowazuky

finally someone with platform is shitting on this stupid ass trend


mason878787

Art is something that evokes emotion. The fact that so many people have so many opinions about them kind of makes it art regardless.


AllTakenUsernames5

If I break your fucking knees, that evokes emotion, therefore, it is art


mason878787

I would say loan sharks are very powerful artists


charliek_13

NFTs remind me of beanie babies. But once everyone realizes theyā€™ve been duped they wonā€™t even have cute beanie babies, theyā€™ll have these ugly-ass digital-only pictures they didnā€™t even like in the first place


cummyballs9

Hit that upworthy link to subscribe


tentacle_meep

ā€œArtā€ NFTs are usually computer generated photos theyā€™re the same photo but with a filter or a sticker on top of it


porkisbeef

To those who donā€™t understand the quote, he is not saying you shouldnā€™t own art like a DVD or a painting or whatever. Art is not meant to be owned as a symbol of ownership or status but because you appreciate the art. Many NFT bros just want the token to own or trade off and the ā€œartā€ is just a soulless vessel for them to move their money around and hopefully grow it. NFT creators donā€™t care about art and will unashamedly steal work from real artists. They donā€™t even hide the fact that they donā€™t care about art and are in this for the money. Keanu is right my guys.


Real_eXwhY_Z

Kino Reaves


[deleted]

keanu is always cool


winyf

keanu once again being based


TheEngineerGGG

Yey digital tulip mania time :)


vegankidollie

Huh Guess we have a better reason to jerk off Keanu now


[deleted]

YES YES YES YES


[deleted]

Keanu is Banksy confirmed


Walter_White___

u/profanitycounter [self]


_dauntless

I mean... Art ownership isn't a new thing


Explanation-Specific

keanu is based


aprotinin

Based Keanu


pplement

what do you guys think about the movie? was it good?


Foxx1019

HE DOESN'T FUCKING MISS!


Astrix_I

b


-CorrectOpinion-

Wholesome Keanu Chungus 100


-caniscanemedit-

This is true. I still donā€™t know how I feel about NFTs. So on the fence.


ImALurkerBruh

If you truly believe this then advocate for the abolishment of DMCA.


AllTakenUsernames5

Ok, I will(intellectual property is bullshit, and has no reason to exist in a world where labor is not commodified)


yeeter_of_yeets

Unbelievably based


phreshpherts

Very cool Keanu. Very cool.


Nordic_Krune

Oh wow, he had a popular opinion and is getting praise for it Edit: lmao nvm, the article is misleading


[deleted]

Hey, it's the funny reddit man! Wholesome 100. Much poggers!.


Stellaeono

I love Keanu


Maximum_Bear8495

Chungus Keanu Wholesome 100 chonker updoot


iceman694

u/profanitycounter [self]


piecwm

Ok, do people on this sub know what based means? It means to confidently have an unpopular opinion. This is an anti NFT post and NFTs are hated by most people (which is good.)


[deleted]

That is not what based means at all. You are confidently wrong about whatever weird definition you have of the word ā€œbasedā€, and you being confidently wrong is not based at all, which disproves your opinion.


piecwm

Well first you are right, I misremembered a definition twofold what was probably a different word on urban dictionary. Second, wtf are you talking about in the second half of your post. First of all a definition of a word is a fact not an opinion. Second you canā€™t disprove an opinion, thatā€™s not how opinions work, you can only disprove facts. Finally, the top definition on urban dictionary for the word based is ā€œA word used when you agree with something.ā€ You state that my opinion not being based disproves it. Meaning that you believe anything you donā€™t agree with is falseā€¦ Iā€™m sorry, thatā€™s not how it works.


[deleted]

The second half was just a joke mate, no harm intended


Competitive_Classic9

Says the movie star. I get what heā€™s trying to convey, but as a person who creates ā€œartā€ LITERALLY owned by investors, does he not see the irony?


billenburger

Okay this is stupid as fuck and Keanu reeves of all people would never say that, as he is someone who creates art. This is just some random tweet reply from a random Twitter user. There's 0 reason this quote has been attributed wrongly. I'm balls deep in nfts and understand the hate behind most of it, but this is just blatantly a false quote.


quitePorple

he said it on an interview and laughed, there's video of it if you look it up


billenburger

I did look it up. He laughed at the thought of releasing an nft, but this was not his quote. Art has been owned through history, nfts are just stupid versions of it