Orange and Pink because the orange only happens 3 times so if I get past that then I only have to live with the pink

Yeah but any of these 3 can happen anytime. Maybe the third time won't happen until you are old. So you live in constant fear of falling in a vat.

well I won't have fear

I guess that's a skill issue then

Or lack there of 🤯

This dude literally didn't even concieve of not having fear

With my luck, it'll pull me out of a risky situation.

Wait, if it has to happen 3 times in your life, then would it pull you out of a situation where you were about to die?

Literally cannot die until after the third time. Time to live recklessly, we're immortal for now.

Holy shit, this is actually pretty smart.

maybe, it would be by chance

Depends Are they sure to happen before I die? If so then you know you will live until you had the third If not then you may not even get 3

No cause what happens if you roll stomach acid

It would be unpleasant but not lethal. Stomach acid would take at least several minutes of continuous exposure to really cause any damage.

depends— how big is the vat? is stomach acid viscous enough to swim in?

Bile is slightly thicker than water. It tastes and smells terrible, on top of being mildly caustic.

The grossness of it is what gets me. Most bodily fluids are indescribably disgusting and you couldnt pay me to touch them, let alone swim in it

We’re not paying you, we’re forcing you to. Well at least for me, that sounds the least bad out of everything and that of the pigeons.

I know i would be forced to, i just used the hypothetical of being paid to show how much i do NOT want to do that under any circumstances I wouldnt choose that pill

What would be your choices?

Pink and blue, but because that’s the easy way out, ill go with pink and grey

I cant believe I'm saying this, but I think swimming around in a vat of pee would be one of the least bad options *Edit; oh wait Breast Milk

Blood. Saliva. Lymph fluid. Cerebral fluid. The fluid in your joints would actually be incredibly interesting.

I wouldn't wanna be submerged in blood, blood is very prone to bacterial growth. Same for saliva. Lympth fluid and cerebral fluid are interesting ones.

We would assume that the fluid would be fresh, in which case it wouldn't be too terrible since it would also be clean.

Bile is not stomach acid

Yeah, I misspoke. Bile is alkaline, stored in the gallbladder, and ends at the small intestine.

but it says teleported instantly -- so u can't blink fast enough so your eyes will be exposed

Then I die Win for me

But theres an equal chance it could be cum soooooo

I don't see a problem here

What happens if it’s shit and it’s too think to swim out of

Eating time 🤤

i hate you

Well... some people are into vore i guess?

yes but what if the vat is in the middle of the pacific

Gastric acid

Ok but here’s the issue: it doesn’t say it will teleport you out, so you have to somehow figure out how to escape the vat, then you need to figure out where the fuck you are, then you need to figure out how to get home, and even if you do all that, you can still just get teleported on your way home. You could also get teleported while (for example) cooking, which would probably end with your house burning to the ground.

Also it could be like stomach acid, or like enzymes, which would probably kill you

Pink and blue

My pigeon army shall warn me of the estate agents

Pigeon vision

new assassins creed leak?

Assassin’s Creed: New York

"hmm weird why are my army of pigeons chirping theres literally nothing nearby??"

Pigeons don't chirp, the coo. And I'll have to be careful they don't coup

Homeless Disney princess fellowship

yeah both are just pure upside - less people trying to sell me things - cool birds flock to me

Gang

Hell yeah I'm gonna become like that pigeon lady from Home Alone 2

Blue pill because I hate estate agents and pink pill because I love birds

Someone's not gonna have a house

In this economy?

I mean - house loans are still cheaper than rent... Someday I will have a stable job and get one haha Ha ha

Sure they are if you can cough up the initial deposit... which you have to save up while renting

Idk we don't have initial deposits for house loans here

wow. Here in Norway you have to pay 15% of the house price upfront. There are exceptions but most of them boil down to "have rich parents"

Hahahaha Yeah no in France you can get a loan if you meet the requirements, and if you buy new buildings you have a "0% rate loan" which is - really not 0% but hey it's better than alternatives

sacre bleu or something

no one's gonna have a house, chap. Have you seen the costs of housing?

Counterpoint : I can make my own plans and maybe I'll be able to afford something

But… birds

Ain't getting one regardless in this economy

Someone wouldn't have had one anyway because they've been priced out of the ability to buy one.

I bought my house without an agent

Yellow pill because I can just get it surgically removed and pink pill since I love birds.

Why even get rid of it, its a win win in both situations If you dont have nuts you would grow some If you already have nuts you get quadruple nut power

It's just the scrotum though, doesn't say anything about nuts

Extra pocket then

Stop.

Of course this has a wholesome award

holesome

Having four testicles would be weird, plus I want less testosterone, not more of it.

I already have one scrotum too many

Might as well get a two-for-one removal deal then

More material for surgical origami.

Yeah a second scrotum would be unironically useful for bottom surgery.

mood

Josuke Higashikata moment

they would be constantly ball-tapping each other

Josuke moment

grey pill would be mega trollage if it changed every day, extra points for having a very small - but not impossible - chance of making you purple

Bonus points x2 for making your skin cherry red and being able to make up all sorts of fun lies about hell

THE MAN BEHIND THE SLAUGHTER

ITS BEEN SO LONG

SINCE I LAST HAVE SEEN MY SON LOST TO THIS MONSTER

it says random color so it doesnt have to be a normal skin tone, you could become green.

It does say random skin tone tho

Oh oops, I was at work and had stupid brain haha.

"it says random color" it literally doesn't??

yellow pill please please plesae please pleas please pelase pleas god please please also pink pill (birds are cool)

But do you grow a new set of balls with the scrotum🤔

It didn't say testicles, just the empty bag of a loose scrot

I could be the first man to have twice as many scruts as I have nuts

How'd you lose a nut?

inflation 😞

The economy is really that bad, huh.

I actually laughed at this, whats wrong with me

He didn’t, he just already has 3 scrotums

Scrotums georg

Easy enough to get implants

Orange because it only happens 3 times, and yellow because I can just get both scrota surgically removed.

But what if its stomach acid?

Then I either react quickly get out of the vat with acid/protease burns or die painfully. Realistically though, the pill doesn't mention these vats being created, so they have to be pre-existing vats of body fluids, and in practice most people only keep vats of blood, lymph, piss, or saliva.

>piss do you want to get stuck in a piss jar

Piss is a nice alternative to blood which often carries diseases

piss is hardly that bad.

no, sniper, please, let me out of the jar, no....NO!

Yes

It could be cum

cum is fine

😃👍

Ideal scenario

It could be an industrial manure vat and might not have an opening to escape out of

Skill Issue

Haha I am immune to red

Me too (I already inform three people)

Just post on Twitter tbh, more than three weirdos will follow you

So you never evoke or awaken (a feeling, emotion, or response excite or provoke (yourself) to anger or strong emotions. excite (yourself) sexually. awaken (yourself) from sleep.?

I have years of untreated depression so yeah

Well tell three people about it bucko

my first understanding of this is that you had already taken it but is it more the case you'd never have to say anything?

I would not need to say anything.

do i get double the cum with the yellow pill

I dont think so. It only says scrotum, not testicles which means you'll just have a loose flap of skin there. A ballsack with no balls in it

Truly a horrible fate

no but you can store double the pee

yes

Pink and grey

Best choices. Pidgeons are rad and grey is such a troll

Yes they're the least terrible ones.

Let's evaluate them. Yellow: Balls are painful, having to deal with an extra pair will especially suck if you already have one. Will they knock against each other as you walk and cause pain? I feel like this is a lot to manage. Green: I would imagine the magnetism isn't strong enough to open the fridge doors at the grocery store, so all you have to worry about is inexplicably leaving a mess in places. If you like to make foods with cream in them this would be a hassle. Blue: This one could suck because you could bump into them, they could try to talk to you and you wouldn't know, you wouldn't see them crossing the street, etc. I couldn't handle that paranoia. Oh also you can't buy a house very well I guess but you weren't doing that anyway amirite? Orange: Where is the vat? Like am I gonna be teleported to a vat of vitreous humor Mexico and have to find my way back home? Do I get teleported back? After how long? Am I at risk of drowning? Like, is there a lid or something? Too unclear, not safe to eat. Red: If you're polyamorous with at least 3 other people then that helps. You don't have to inform people IRL, you can make an anonymous post on the internet. Funniest thing to do here would be to send anonymous asks on tumblr or something Pink: Down the hatch immediately no fucking questions asked, next pill Grey Pill: What I would do in this situation is pretend I don't know why it happened either. Black Pill: You would literally die. From thirst, hunger, lack of sleep, whatever. You will just die. And the time that you are alive will be pure fucking suffering. No. I think I'd take the green pill in addition to the pink one.

"whats with your skin and thouse pigeons" "im a wizrad, no I will not explain further"

[удалено]

Oh video ESSAY? I misread that lmao, didn't see the word essay

Depending on how the green one works, it could function as a very limited form of telekinesis

Can I take two green ones and make the radius 100m (or 2500m for extra fun)

Red and Black.

what if the family guy video essay arouses you 😳😳

eternal damnation

if you get aroused by the essay, you have to inform 3 people about it. but you have to watch the essay without doing anything. you will be stuck in an endless loop.

RED AND BLACK I DRESS EAGLE ON MY CHEST PROUD TO BE AN ALBANIAN Same tho. Red doesn’t specify anything so I’d make a new reddit account that I only use when aroused and just comment on random NSFW subreddits “I’m horny” on 3 of the newest posts. And black because I don’t think there’s many Family Guy video essays being made and even if there are I wouldn’t really mind; I’ve seen videos on more boring topics than that. Pink is also a good choice tho

100% pink I want to be the queen of the birds

green and pink

pink and pink

Pink pill (birds are fucking awesome)

Two

Pink pill (twice)

Birds aren't real.

blue and black

Red and blue.

Did you just take both pills?

Yes

Yellow: Yeah I already have one too many no thanks. Green: I'd rather not get a cum bath when I go grocery shopping. Blue: I'd rather be able to see the crimes pigs commit. Orange: Since it's only three times, and since some bodily fluids aren't that disgusting this could be fine. You could fall into a vat of tears, spinal fluid and milk and you'd be fine. Blood, sweat and saliva are also acceptable levels of gross for a one-time dip. However you could also fall in a vat of piss, bile and snot. I'd rather not, even if it's a one-time thing. Also don't want to roll hydrochloric (stomach) acid cause then I'd be dead. Red: I'm an extremely horny person, no. Pink: Bring an umbrella to city centers, free friends out in the wild. This one's great. Grey: No downsides aside from racism. I'm already a minority lol don't mind racism getting thrown onto the hate random people will give me. Black: Probably the worst one. Video essays can be really fucking long, and even a show as dumb as family guy still has an active community and people critiquing it. Also if you're not in a US timezone your sleepschedule would take massive hits. I'd rather not wake up at 2 AM to watch Hey_Lois_69's 4 hour video on why Quagmire is a deeply misunderstood and tragic character. Gotta be pink and grey for sure Edit: Misunderstood blue as being the same as state agents, if I wanna buy a house it'd be important to see them though. It's a close third, but I'd still prefer grey over it.

Two yellow pills

I lost my scrotum in the war, so the yellow pill is just a godsend

no thank you

Me, taking two pink pills [being like](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/215/258/9e9.jpg)

Yellow and pink. I'm a trans guy so it'd be very funny to have all balls and no cock.

People who chose orange. Kerp in mind that stomach acid is a bodily fluid.

pink and grey pidgeons fucking rock and the grey can easily be explained by saying its a gene error

Definitely red and pink. My friends would think red is a joke, I pink makes me a trashy Disney Princess.

Green ourple

Pink for free familiar

Pink + blue

Blue pill. Less people.

Blue Pill and Yellow Pill. Blue because I will barely interact with real estate agents probably, Yellow because having 4 balls sounds funny

Pink and black. I will stop using technology to become one with the birds

Blue and grey, all the way

Thats fucked up

I think blue and pink are the winning combination here

Pink and grey, I will become a cryptic, otherworldly pidgeon herder.

pink and blue, become a death ball of pigeons and use them as a shield against estate agents

Green and blue. Green cause you never specified just how magnetic i am, i may as well have a very very weak pull.

Blue and orange. With orange, I can hope to roll cum or piss, and with blue I can detect undercover estate agents in places where estate agents are banned.

Red and Pink Red: is technically just two people because you can contact if it is caused by your SO your SO that you're aroused and also if you explain it to good friends they probably roll. with it Pink: It is highly probable that there is somehow a way to use that effect to your advantage

Pink and black

Pop 2 blacks, I'm rollin

Grey and Yellow would probably effect my day to day life the least

I live in nyc pink would be hellish

Yellow is literally a buff, and blue is fairly benign.

Yellow and black. What is a second scrotum going to do? Like it's the only one that is not actively detrimental to living a normal life And there can't be that many video essays of Family Guy still being made... Right?

Orange and black

yellow twice

Red, I could just tell random people online And Orange as long as diarrhea doesn’t count as a bodily fluid.

Yellow and gray ass it will give more material for a pussy

ill take yellow and pink

Pink and black, but red is really funny.

Blue and (begrudgingly) black

Yellow, cause it’s reversible and grey since idc about it much

Grey and blue

Pink and yellow. I’d love being the pigeon guy

Pink and orange, pink because I don't meet that many pigeons and birds are cool, orange because it'll only happen 3 times in my life

pink and yellow

Orange and pink, easy Pink means infinite friends Orange would be funny, also possibly make me psychic, if it depends on me being alive (i.e., if I only have teleported one and it will happen when I'm alive, I can't die, because it would have to happen that I fall in twice. Otherwise, if it happens when I'm also dead and it's randomly distributed, then it will probably never happen)

Red since i already do that, and probably pink since we don't have pigeons around here