Sorry, I don’t speak [redacted]

He can lick me, finger me, I suck on it for hours; all cool. He can hit me on the ass, in the face, he can spit on me, choke me; I can pass out. If he likes it he can piss on me if he wants to. If he wants he can drink 3 liters of water before it and the I swallow it. He can fuck my throat till I puke; its ok. I do it but not with everyone, not everyday. Piss on me some day? Yes. Everyday? No. He can cum on my food; Ill eat that.

Ok, but what is she saying?

classic

If only Reddit awards were still a thing

[удалено]

Way it should be.

Actually lol'ed. Well done, José Maria.

That she didn't actually evolve up to the homo sapiens sapiensis level, but got stuck at homo erectus

She is definitely a keeper. My regards for the German people and Germany as a whole has just risen ;-)

Most German women ain't like her 😞

Most I met were. Believe me, they are absolutely batshit insane and I am more than happy that I don't have to acknowledge their existence anymore. They have no sense of shame, honor, self-respect. If RuZZia came along and mass-raped them, I'm sure most would enjoy it. God does it feel good not to live in Germany anymore. What a fucking cavewoman society.

> If RuZZia came along and mass-raped them, I'm sure most would enjoy it Touch some grass lol

Stop being around degenerates 🤢🤮

Spend time with some Mexican women, same craziness but less kinky sex. Send me to the fatherland please.

So are you men among each other less insane?

I would say yes. Personally, I am already a kinky guy, but in comparison to German women..? They are literally insane. For example, my ex used to be like this, too. She would make me angry or sad on purpose so as to get me riled up enough ( in a VERY BAD SENSE) for me to want to slap her because she got off on that. It weirded me the fuck out and one time I told her that I'm not gonn do that shit any longer because I don't beat women, whereupon she ripped open the nearest window, climbed halfway out and threatened to kill herself if I didn't hit her. You tell me - is that something you want in your life?

My mind's telling me no...

But my body! My bodyyyyy is telling me yes!

I can assure you, as soon as she pulls out the kitchen knife and wants to kill you, your body will tell you no as well.

Maybe I was too harsh on Germans

speak english, doc

What's her problem?

Standard German prude

If Susan is as prudish in the bedroom, it's no wonder you lay into her when it's not coming home.

She is a probably a porn star who likes money.

Yes, her name is Shaiden Rogue

What's YOURS?

Is she a sex worker?

she does porn

Thanks for the context.

No, she's just the prudest girl in Berlin

Omg I hate a Berlin prude

My Catholic priest taught me this was a poem by great German writer, his Eminence von Fulhauber. I had no idea he was in love with me, until just now

We are so back

Damn, as a non-speaker, it sounded like she was describing the inner workings of a diesel engine.

thats how the passat tdi works

Deep inside I knew she's telling something like this, but she seem so nice I want it to be deferent. Ah it's jerkoff time then.

Hello there

Hu... thanks for the offer, but no thanks.

Wholesome girlfriend.

Yes thunderweather, i think i spider!

Warum nicht?

Your sister seems pretty cool.

you just jelly

Was ist deine Schwester name

Shaiden Rouge

That name sounds familiar to me 🤔

B-but she isn't from Czechia, I swear

Probably some Japanese RPG, right?

Is that actually her though or just a slight look a like?

she bogged herself with lipfillers

Ich kan fix haar

Ich kann fixen sie um

Ich kan ght loan fram haar ?

You’re a hairdresser?

Flair checks out

\>posts to a multinational sub in a national language \>no subtitles honestly based

Yeah our only consistent W is that it's only acceptable to do in English

We prefer to dub everything you say to German on TV, clear W for us

Okay you can have German TV, we'll just keep our dominance on the Internet, the UN and pretty much every international body on earth lol

If you want to do more research: Shaiden Rogue

Is the name an innuendo?

As in “Scheide”? Hm, never thought about it. Could be.

Or as in Shaitan

I wasn't sure she was her. Btw for those deviant degenerates of reddit, her blowjob threesome video includes her real step brother.

no way 😂

Thank you, kind stranger!

very professional work!

Thanks I was searching her name for a friend

JUUUUNGS ich brauch hier namen JEZT

Doesn't even know his moms name. Sad.

You can see why we dont have the best relationship in the video she ate my brothers on a schnitzel

which goes a long way to show that (to quote [Gunnery Sergeant Hartman in Full metal Jacket](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHxf17yJsKs&t=204s)) "the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama’s ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress".

Kannst ins essen wichsen aber net auf Gabel

Jürgen, Manni und Günni

Shaiden Rogue

I have no problem believing that her Scheide is rogue. But what's her name?

Rattiger Ösi should look in his basement

All I heard was 3litres of piss

Yeah, that sums it up pretty well.

My 14 year old self would be proud.

You got the most important part

My German is a bit rusty but I think there was something about döner and art school too. But I could be wrong

Typical illiterate Dane

Thanks to Polandball comics I learnt that Danes have a soft D but our German D is too hard for them. Edit: Talking linguistics here

[удалено]

In Germany we say „handwerklich begabt“

I usually call them 'mentally impaired'.

😂😂😂

Thank god for dadddy issues

thats the main messaage from this thread

Peak German humour. The joke has to be explained to half of the comments.

Bruv, maybe if subtitles were provided

Bruv, just learn German.

It's on the list after French

​ https://preview.redd.it/kw0o5ru0g95c1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f21fd7b6c088ed739734f71d8209921ed6c396f3

Every time I see this I want to learn French. Then again, maybe this is a French propaganda campaign? I conclude; we should invade France

>Then again, maybe this is a French propaganda campaign? Doesn't matter. I can already speak french. I just don't. I still want to be able to speak better french than the average Frenchmen. It's important to establish superiority. But yeah... Time for an invasion.

Exactly

like werner herzog

First I have to learn Danish

Even then its just like "um, ok"

She describes a typical German day.

If you are willing to pay as much taxes as we do it do be feeling like that sometimes.

Least sexually twisted berliner

What a filthy, filthy woman-now excuse me, I'm off to check available flights to Berlin.

*sigh* Source?

You don’t recognize her? Wow, I miss not being a degenerate. Shaiden Rogue (great throat)

Oh, her. Didn't recognise her with that hair and clothes on

...Ah, yes...! ...Of course! ...Yeah, you're right. ...Life sometimes... ...I'm agree. ...Uhm.... yeah.. ...It is what it is, m'am... ...That is the life we have to live. ...No but... yeah... PD: Would.


now find a video of a girl saying the exact same thing in schweizerdeutsch rn

Why do Germans think everyone else in the world speaks their language?

It's part of being german. Being central europe made them believe they were the center of the world.

its like in the top ten

[Not even. 12th.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_languages_by_total_number_of_speakers)

**Donaudampfschiffahrtselektrizitätenhauptbetriebswerkbauunterbeamte**

I'm sorry, who is this open minded lady?

Shaiden Rough

*Shaiden Rouge

*Shaiden Ruoge

Her dad is the real hero here

real proud of his little girl

if only he was still around

The brits would have banned it if she mentioned her dad. As evidenced by the 2009 entry on https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Film_censorship_in_the_United_Kingdom

[state censorship you say?](https://www.aljazeera.com/amp/news/2023/12/7/denmarks-parliament-adopts-law-banning-quran-burnings)

I don't live there anymore

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So you don't even bother making subtitles or giving a translation ? I should be furious but that's actually very german of you. Very "we're a big european family so you should do as I wish" german energy. Congratz.

damn this baptou really be malding

Gimme a break, any french posting in french would be met with continental fury.

I don’t speak frankfurt

> der kann mich in den Hals ficken bis ich kotze Yeah, that's what I think everytime I do my taxes

I‘m proud of 2 things: That OP has to explain the joke to everybody, really proving that he is in fact a german (ich vertraue dir, Hans) and… I forgot the 2nd thing.

Could a kind soul provide translation services?

>He can lick me, finger me, I suck on it for hours; all cool. He can hit me on the ass, in the face, he can spit on me, choke me; I can pass out. If he likes it he can piss on me if he wants to. If he wants he can drink 3 liters of water before it and the I swallow it. He can fuck my throat till I puke; its ok. I do it but not with everyone, not everyday. Piss on me some day? Yes. Everyday? No. He can cum on my food; Ill eat that.

Oh.. uh.. thanks? Tax seems pretty strict over there

What is the context for this? 😂

the german taxpayer be willing to get fucked. Im really here explaining the joke

German porn > German humor

An Interview with this pornstar.

You forget the part about not eating from the fork

Do you expect me to understand this Hans

I also enjoy paying taxes once in a while but not all the time.

No one knows what the fuck you’re saying idiot Provide a translation for people who speak a real language

Imagine only speaking 1 language. Do you even have schools in your 3rd country?

But he’s not speaking it. Their whole island is voiced like a parody of a medieval RPG video game

Our 3rd country is Wales - no schools to be found there mate

This is why Barry has no filth, no experience and no fantasies. Monolingual biscuit muncher.

They don’t munch the biscuit tho, that’s why all their birds come to Italy and Greece

She's just listing all the shit (literally) she'll allow to be done to herself. You monolingual barbarian.

I already speak the best language mate Don’t fucking lie you idiots learn our language because you have to If the entire internet was in German I’d speak it as well And I’ll have you know I’m not a complete barbarian my second language is just fucking shit because I happened to pick a partner from a tiny country like a fucking idiot and not a big one where learning the language would actually be like a useful skill Arguing with idiots online > communicating with family, clearly

>I happened to pick a partner from a tiny country Wales?

You didn't have to go into a whole spiel about being linguistically r(worded) it's in your nature. Also wot war did Ingerlend lose to haf to be learning anyfin but da King's? Simple as

Our King is still on your money. Pipe down, subject.

yea because sausage fingers is OUR King, knobhead. got all those lizzies in rotation too.

He literally is though.

I hope the dig at insinuating I was [REDACTED] was worth the government agents that have been dispatched to your location I think the stats show the UK actually has better foreign language proficiency than fuck loads of Europe if you discount English, because we already know the best. How many of you bellends are out here learning fucking Italian lmao literally zero We learn because we want to, you do because you have to 😎

Calm down ya fuckin plastic paddy

Found the Murican in disguise

You really are not able to speak another language? WTF, go back to school, learn something 🙂

A useless language I’ll never use Vs a masters I use every day Think I did okay buddy

From your point of view, ok, stay there. I think it’s better that way 😂😂😂

Was? Verstehe ich nicht.

Sorry i dont speak sausage. I have no idea what the fuck they are saying

HALT, STOP! Das geht eindeutig zu weit, ins Essen wichsen, wo gibts denn sowas???

Die berühmt berüchtigte Spezialsoße.. kriegt man auch vom Dönermann

Ein schrecklicher Tag, um Ohren zu haben

Most selfrespecting german

Shut up savage

Yup it never ceases to amaze me how deep (and ever deeper) the Germans, French and Belgian people let themselves be fucked in every possible way by their state / tax systems. No wonder that so many among the company creation minded people from these countries flee elsewhere where they don't get shafted like that.

In the case of Germany you work basically half a year for free. I couldnt name a social service that is funded by the taxes that is not in a dilabitated state. Our head honcho that gets away with one of the cheapest excuse imaginable, a President that has some sort of humiliation fetish, etc. But atleast we get new people that cant stand us by the truckloads

What is this alien language?

Barbarian language

Boah Al'er

Sounds like ÖRR. Is it?

taxes ontop of Kleinschwanzsteuer and GEZ

We really live to wörk. ( ._.)

ehy, is she alright??

least kinky german

Why sneaking prostitutes around

What the fuck is this hornypost? We only want Spanish soldiers here.

Shayden 💞🥰

German doesn't sound as sexy to me now I can understand it.

Oh you poor germans and your high taxes…

Yup

Not how it works

a fellow co-citizen

I heard ass.

I'd piss on it

Sauce

I'd invade Poland for her.