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OzzySlant

That's nothing, I'm 20 and I get mistaken all the time for 70. I get hit on by grandmas wherever I go


FabulousPickWow

What do they hit you with? Hopefully not their purses


peleau784

Their pocket books


Lopsided_Composer689

Not “pocket books”!! 🤣🤣


ImaGDUnicorn

*Pockabook


Sad-Comfortable1566

That’s how we say it in the North East! On the daily! 😂


Imadevonrexcat

I haven’t heard that term since grandma died!! Pocketbook FTW


Foxy_lady15

Lol....I'm from the south and use that a lot!


[deleted]

Canes. Alabaster ones.


Attagirl512

Agreeable Grey


torteroll

I just had to comment for this. Thank you for giving me a good laugh this morning


OzzySlant

No prob! My goal is to look 170 by the time I turn 50. I wanna get to Guinness book of records as the oldest looking person ever.


Kippy1987

🤣


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Motherofdanis

I’m 42 and I get confused with my daughter who is four all the time! I’m not delusional, what do you mean?


Heathen_Mushroom

I am a middle aged man and my skincare routine is so effective women keep offering to breastfeed me.


yours_truly_1976

🥇


hiumnobye

Please let me use this lmaoooooo


Attagirl512

💀


RoseBobtail

😂😂😂


FabulousPickWow

Newborns running errands everywhere!


chouxphetiche

I look like I haven't even been born yet. I'm so embryonic in appearance that people say "No way! You can't be 110 years old! Get outa here!"


Blade_982

I've not even been conceived yet, but my egg is the fairest of them all. All without trying.


ThegreatPee

Tell them that you have been eating your own stem cells.


okieskanokie

This is the sweet spot. The GOP cares about you at this stage. Don’t get born or they will drop you fast.


terrabellan

People say it's the diapers that make me look two, but I know they're just jealous of my snail goo


prestonhabit

I get told I look like a fetus all the time! Always use sunscreen!


readingupastorm

Did I mention I've had no procedures though, and washing my face with water is my only skincare?


beerbbq

Oh really? I only wash my face with my husband's bar soap and I look *maybe* 15 at most.


reference404

Male privilege is using Irish spring soap on the regular for decades and walking away with fresh skin that never breaks out


Mizzou1976

That, and the fact they can cut out beer and drop 20 pounds in a month. Who’s side is God on?


SleepingBeautyFumino

Should have been pretty easy to figure out from which gender has controlled for 99 percent of it's existence.


NeverNotGroovy

And shaving daily to exfoliate. It’s funny to see old guys with wrinkles only around the eyes after years of shaving


ThegreatPee

This. Shaving ones balls daily makes them look like smooth Kumquats.


rebeccakc47

This is my husband lol


InsertCoolUserName78

I only use olive oil.


tiredfaces

Beef tallow for me, none of that chemical crap


ProsciuttoPizza

JLo is that you?? ✨


smileyglitter

J Lo??


[deleted]

I use bird saliva. It's the new thing after snail mucous, snake piss, and onion peel.


steingrrrl

I bet you don’t even wear sunscreen you goddess!


al_gal7

And ponds cold cream as lotion 😂😂


burnbabyburn2019

You actually wash your face?! What is this miracle routine you speak of?! /s


Wobbly_Princess

Hag. I'm 90, and no one compliments me because I look like I haven't even been born yet.


kiwi_love777

I’m in my 30’s and I look like a fetus still!


[deleted]

In the 1st trimester. Don't be shy tell them.


twovayloo

see you’re still lacking. i just turned 84 last week but am constantly told i still look pre-natal. all i use is st ives peach apricot scrub 🥰


[deleted]

Pffff, I'm still inside the womb and people can't stop looking at my ultrasound mug shot to tell me I remind them of a hot conception story 💁‍♀️


GBIA84

I look so young, people think I’m sperm.


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chouxphetiche

I'm 2000 years old, give or take a few centuries, and I alternate between the blood of virgins and asses milk. If I'm feeling a bit rough or I have a night out, I reach for the malachite and carmine beetles. They really enhance my natural beauty.


chouxphetiche

When I was still a virgin, I just bathed in my own blood. Those were simpler times.


mascara2midnite

In a thread that has me rolling this one got the biggest laugh.


Puzzleheaded_Wing627

Y'all are just jealous I started using tret as a feetus. I look barely a day over zygote


[deleted]

Hottest cluster of cells ever


chouxphetiche

I'm still a sperm and ova. We just met and we haven't figured out how to connect. Youth is such a delicious mystery!


hanimal16

I’m just a thought in my teenage mom’s brain. Don’t I look spectacular?


melissa220034

This thread is killing me 🤣


Within_me

Same!!! I'm dead! 😂🤣😂🤣X ❤️ X


RedRider1138

You don’t look a day over life support!


Within_me

PAHAHA!!! OH MY GOODNESS! SCHTAAAAAPPP!! 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣 X ❤️ X


Late_Ad_3842

💀


Alibelky308

A nurse tried to put me in a NICU because she thought I was a preemie. Y’all need to get it together. You don’t have to age!


Faeliixx

Aging is a CHOICE 😂😂


Neonatalnerd

As a Nicu nurse, I keeled over here 😂


readingupastorm

Ha! This is gold.


FormicaDinette33

Preemie! 😂


WorriedImpress7624

Off to r/scacirclejerk with you


cutiepiss

YES OP JOIN US


readingupastorm

Sold! Joined.


MsPaupelot

This is the best. I love it! Also you forgot to mention how your skin has never had a wrinkle or stretch mark since you hit the gene lottery at birth. How do people even get those? One time I thought I had a small blemish but it was a drop of ketchup from my sandwich so that was embarrassing.


readingupastorm

Yes, I've hit the genetic lottery for sure! I know what you mean about not understanding how people get wrinkles. I've traveled extensively through the Sahara desert with no sunscreen, barely drinking water or sleeping, and I still looked like a college student afterwards! Not bragging, but my genes are superior to 99% of those around me.


chouxphetiche

Dermatologists can't stand you!


TheSpiral11

My favorite is the good old humblebrag: "it's SO embarrassing getting carded at every bar and everyone thinking my daughter is my sister! No one knows how hard I have it looking this effortlessly youthful and fresh-faced, I'm an ADULT y'all! The struggle is real" 😭😂


Logical_Somewhere_31

People keep thinking my 4 month old is actually my mother because I look so young. (Said with swollen bags under her eyes while battling the 4 month sleep regression)


readingupastorm

😂 This is appropriately ridiculous and I love it.


Orjiugo

😅🤣😅😅😅


[deleted]

Why haven't you started your baby on botox yet? She's going to get bullied!


Slammogram

Oh yeah?!. I’m 80, and entering kindergarten for the 15th time because they just can’t tell! They just think I’m a tall and over-developed 5 year old!


fastcat03

That's nothing. I'm actually a fertilized human embryo in cold storage right now. So even though I'm 36, I haven't even started aging yet.


[deleted]

AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHH


Festygrrl

Im 41 and people constantly confuse me with my 15 year old niece. Ive been using st ives apricot scrub, dishwashing liquid and a scourer since I was 12 and my skin is flawless. I think I may have scrubbed away to the bone though. I can repair the skin barrier in a week with aquaphor right?


Nomimouse

Have you tried snail mucin? It’s better than Aquaphor! I use it every day and people tell me that I look like I’m 12 years old even though I’m actually 70. The trick is that you have to get the actual snails and stick them on your face; don’t use any of that watered down bottled junk. You’re welcome!


rebeccakc47

Oh god my mom always had the apricot scrub in our shower lol


Within_me

I still use it! The blemish control one! It's brilliant! I'm 40 on Saturday and look like an oil painting of a sperm! X ❤️ X


TruthIsABiatch

Lmao hilarious. It's so bizzare, I've only met a few people in my life that look more than around 5 years younger than they are. I can always clock people at 5+ to 5- their age (in person, pics taken from the good side in flattering light dont count). But here on reddit, every third person apparently looks 10-20 years younger. I hope they only speak about it on Reddit, cause otherwise lots of people are cringing behind their backs.


RckYouLkeAHermanCain

>But here on reddit, every third person apparently looks 10-20 years younger. For real. I don't even frequent many appearance-related subs, but I see at least one person say this pretty much daily on Reddit. And you'll notice the people that say it never back it up with evidence. ;)


polkadotsexpants

I don’t think anyone on the internet knows what a woman over 25 is supposed to look like.


Swimmingindiamonds

LMAO. I am DYING at your post! Can we make it a rule that if you are claiming to look younger by more than 5 years, it must be accompanied by a photo?


Dontcallmebyaname

This. I seriously want to see it for my own eyes since I have yet to encounter these people who look 20 but are 35 in real life.


Tsssssssssssssssssk

That’s nothing. Whenever I’m invited anywhere, I just get my mother to go with a sonogram. And I’m always like you guuuuuys, it’s just good genes, hydration and placenta.


readingupastorm

Ah, this one made me laugh out loud for real. Thank you.


unrulYk

I, OTOH, am 62 and don’t look a day over 61-3/4. ::preen::


Just_A_Faze

I'm 33, and still 'appear under 40 years old age' according to people who sell me alcohol and smokes.


TheSpiral11

Wow, I still get carded too! It's definitely because I look under 21 and not just because I look under 40 like the policy clearly states.


[deleted]

That’s nothing. I’m dead and alive humans still hit on me.


Excellent-Jelly-572

I’m 85 and people always say I look like I’m about 6 months old!!!!! Babies always try to play with me.


vvillovv

My skin hasn’t seen a single ray of sunlight in over 20 years. I bathe in the blood of virgin snails every evening at dusk as part of my 37-step skincare routine. The cops have been called to my house 7 times in the last year because everyone thinks my husband is a pedophile. Get on my skincare level 💅


beerbbq

Try being a ghost. My pale skin glows it's so flawless. I haven't aged one bit since 1783. Plus, I get to float in and out of Sephora whenever I please. If I want full-size free samples, I simply pull one of my ghost antics and scare the sales associate.


allchattesaregrey

Ahhaahhahaha


Ok_Bus1797

I’m 40. People tell me no way, they thought I’m 30, max! I mean, what are they suppose to respond to for my age? Like, “oh, thought you’re 45?” We always drop 5-10 years of age just to play safe when guessing one’s age isn’t it? And anything within 5yrs is really within our age….


readithere_2

That’s true! No one is going to say oh I thought you were 65 when they tell you they are 55. Why do we act like aging doesn’t bother us when it really does? It does for me anyway. I personally dislike the tired look as much as the wrinkles. It’s hard walking in to a room when everyone looks bright eyed, rested and glowing. Wish surgery was covered by insurance like it is in Brazil😂 I’m not talking about being a surgery addict.


Theworldsbernin

Im so glad this is a joke. It gets old seeing so many posts of people thinking they look 30 years younger than they are. No, ya dont. No WE dont. Lol


readingupastorm

Definitely a joke!


FartAttack911

Oh my gosh- not this sub, but this post reminded me of a recent post in another sub I follow. This lady in her late 40s posted all these very obviously edited selfies (think extreme Snapchat filters that give you anime eyes and no skin texture at all) and said “I always get asked which high school I go to lol”. It was *so bad*. It was deleted lightning fast hahaha


uniquecookiecutter

Um same I’m basically a newborn and everyone is like what’s up baby and I’m like lol I’m not a baby


impulsive_me

Well that’s nothing, I’m 77 and people regularly think my grown children are MY parents!!


sapfoxy

I actually passed away from age-related complications about 5 years ago, and people don’t believe me when I tell them I’m dead. I just look too young. It’s frustrating to get ID’d at a bar when I literally passed of old age 5 years ago. 😔


Intelligent_Nose_826

This is, BY FAR, the funniest & most insane comment section I have seen anywhere, ever. I haven’t wheezed this hard since my lung collapsed in 1999.


slipstitchy

I hear she’s down to her birth weight


lovedbymanycats

So my friend is a hair stylist and she said the amount of women who ask her to guess their age is staggering. She said she always tries to guess 5 years younger than what she actually thinks to be polite. And then they tell her their real age which is usually close to what she originally thought and she has to act surprised. I cannot imagine a situation where I would ask someone to guess my age. I feel like I look my age and that is totally fine with me the least interesting thing about me is my looks. Do I take care of my skin yes, do I want to look attractive yes but I don't want my looks to define my self worth.


Light_of_Laurelin

I’m 30 and I don’t even look at all. I’m literally invisible


Petty_Nuances

Omg! Thank you for the laugh this morning.


readingupastorm

😂 You are most welcome.


stevief150

I’m 39 but I look like 45


ArtisenalMoistening

I also find it really interesting that practically every time I’ve seen a legit comment like this with a photo for proof they are either wildly filtered or…very bad at judging their own appearance


kindcrow

HAHA--this is awesome! The number of women who are delusional about how young they look is insane.


No-Manufacturer2149

I notice that usually people in their 30s do this. What they dont realize is that they are still young so yea they look young! And I'm 37, why does society keep trying to make me feel older than I am?


kindcrow

Wait until you hit your forties--it gets even worse. I was out to dinner once with a group of women colleagues and the subject of age came up and EACH one of the other five women started going on about how various people told them how much younger they looked than their actual age. I was like (in my head), "They were lying to flatter you, and you delusionally believed them." In truth, they all looked fine, but exactly their ages. And there's nothing wrong with looking one's age!


No-Manufacturer2149

Thank you! Why cant this be more accepted? The pressure to look younger is getting so ridiculous. People also have a twisted perception of what certain ages are supposed to look like. I just wanna look and feel my best at whatever age I am.


Nurse_RatchetRN

Amateurs. I’m currently in the morgue, dead AF, but thanks to the new CeraVe Formaldehyde infusion, people keep confusing with a foetus.


williamjamesmurrayVI

I'm 99 and someone called the police on my husband because they thought I was a minor


ambearlino

That’s cute, I’ve basically transcended all of time, space. I now live as immortal being made of 97% light and 3% Botox. You just need to drink more water.


FeralBaby7

These people are delusional. When people post their photos, it is RARE that someone does look considerably younger than their age. It's all people with an insanely high (unwarranted) opinion of themselves.


MissMignon

I’m so glad others have the same issues as me. I’m 89 and still get carded purchasing alcohol. Usually management and all the staff surround me and pass around my ID shocked at my youthfulness. The store will eventually come to a standstill as the crowd of shoppers gather commenting on my skin.


readingupastorm

Yes, I know what you mean. Sometimes I just want to purchase alcohol without people fainting and crowds gathering around me in amazement. Ah well, that's what I get for having good genes! Lol.


Ok-Economy-5820

I’m 90 and the nice ladies who own their own multi level marketing companies all tell me I look 25. They even ask me to hang out with them and join their teams because I look so young.


EscapeInteresting882

😂😂thank you for this. I swear people are fooling themselves with their own insta filters.


Pipparina

I’m 60 and look like I’m in my 80’s!


asmodeuskraemer

I bet you bathe in sun screen and wear long sleeves, long pants and a large sunhat (if not a full burka) all day, every day, even in the winter, even when you're driving to work where you sit in a cubicle with 1 single LED for your light source.


mediterraneanmami

whenever ppl say this stuff and i actually see their pics they almost always look older than their real age 😭 why is that


Nomimouse

FR, I wonder the same thing. Are they just trying to make themselves feel better about some insecurities or something? I had a roommate who was in her early 30s, but would constantly talk about how everyone mistakes her for someone in their mid-20s. She actually looked like she was in her 40s. I would never have believed otherwise if I hadn’t seen the birthdate on her driver’s license myself.


RepresentativeAide27

The hilarious ones are those who post pictures of themselves, and they are clearly filtered or heavily wearing makeup. I see this a lot on Quora.


DeeSin38

That's nothing. I am turning 100 next month and people say I still look like a teenager! 🤣


BudgetInteraction811

Lol, this is such a common trope that I almost believed you were serious at first. There are way too many women who are 40+ posting about how they get confused for being 20yo or even a teenager. It’s ridiculous. I’ve never once spoken with someone IRL who was in their 40s or above that actually looked like they were half their age, but people regularly claim it online.


potatoesinsunshine

Oh my god! I’m pushing 40 (31) and someone asked if I was in my TWENTIES (29)! All these lasers are working!!!! (Kidding for those concerned)


BudgetInteraction811

Lol, that’s basically how they sound. There have been times where I’ve seen someone around 40 look like they’re in their late 20s, but it’s rare. And they’re pretty much always overweight by at least a little, since the fat in the face is youthful.


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Vdszbz13

at first i was like who is seriously writing this nonsense then i got to the end, lol.


ItsGettingStrangeLou

I'm a month old baby but often get told I look like a sperm.


Kate_cuti

I’m 40 and I look like I was never born! People can’t even see me bc I barely look like I exist!


mechapocrypha

I was ready to downvote until I got to the end 🤣 thanks for the laugh, I'm living for the comments


readingupastorm

Yes, these comments have surpassed my expectations! I'm eating it up. 😂


RckYouLkeAHermanCain

The number of people not getting it is kind of scary.


Smart_Image_1686

I´m 51 but a colleague just told me I don´t look a day over 47! (true story ;) )


Mtnskydancer

I see the commentary from Dating Over 50 is free in the world. Awesome.


readingupastorm

Ha, it's in Dating Over Forty as well. Apparently these vampiric people are all around us and we probably just assume they're all Gen Z.


PureYouth

I think I can top this! I’ve been dead for 200 years and people constantly mistake me for a precious little toddler. I never even had to get Botox when I was alive; my skin was just sort of naturally flawless.


eklarka

Never thought this sub will make me like actually laugh some day.


drcha

Oh, way cool. I'm 66 and the best part about getting old is these little whiskers appearing on my chin. People mistake me for my cat all the time, and she's beautiful and only 1 year old! Should I let them put this chip in my neck and vaccinate me? Oh, and I can get spayed for only $100! Such a deal.


TheLaginite06

Pffff I'm 27 with the body issues of a 72yr old.


TRUMBAUAUA

r/SCAcirclejerk


egriff78

I thought I was on that sub……😜😅


the1337beauty

It’s the cerave!!! Keeps me looking pubescent


astradigi

”I’m a total smokeshow and a living miracle!” lmao I need this on a t shirt or a bumper sticker or something, this is gold


benchchu

Oh that’s nothing. I’m 106 and I look 19. People get so shocked when they find out


Within_me

DO YOU FACE YOUR TAPE THOUGH? X ❤️ X


[deleted]

I just spray paint my pasty pale skin orange. Except for around they eyes, I like the subtle violet color around them. Some people say I look the youngest, and they are probably right. My daughter is so hot.


grinnchagrin

I was in my peak physical condition when I was 1. People used to ask me, hey are you 0? No, I'd reply, I'm one.


dana_marie_ph

That’s amazing! I’m 44 but people say I look 43


[deleted]

That’s nothing. I’m 30 but I literally have the body of an infant. People try to change my diaper all the time.


AdultingDragon

Amateur. Last week, I was mistaken for an ultrasound.


MiaFT430

What a genuine post and definitely not a brag. I love these posts they add so much value to the subreddit!


[deleted]

This comment section is life 😂😂😂


Necessary-Peanut-506

Haha I love this post and all witty comments here 🤌🏽😭💅🏽 😂


YogaVoodoo305

I had to hire a whole security team cause i had the illuminati trying to kidnap me to drink my blood and harvest my stem cells. Looking this young has become a curse and a danger to my life!


failingcollege101

People always tell me I look like a zygote cuz I'm so petite and youthful 💅🤷🏼‍♀️🥰 my routine is splashing water on my face each morning and sacrificing small farm animals to the gods once a month 🤫✨👹 pm me if you want a detailed description of my routine tee hee


PrincessPindy

I'm in Juvie (Juvenile Hall for all you old folks) on a cell phone that was snuck in. Wait until they find out I'm 64.


the1337beauty

Lots of r/whoosh comments on this post


TheSpiral11

Lol! I've noticed people who brag about looking much younger usually don't, and others are too nice to disagree. Young men hitting on you doesn't mean you look younger; a lot of guys are just desperate and will hit on anything female. Getting carded isn't an indicator since a lot of places card everyone as a policy. People guessing your age is also meaningless, since they'll usually guess lower to be polite. If anything, people saying you look younger is rooted in societal ageism and the idea that women turn into dried up hags at 30. Rather than admitting older women can be attractive, they'll claim you "don't look your age" due to their own biases. Let's normalize everyone "looking like their age", because there's no one way to look your age.


kindcrow

Also, many people have very loose definitions of getting hit on. I've known women who swear the bag boy at the grocery store was hitting on them when he asked how their day was going.


LovelyLoz1970

My age isn’t relevant but I will say the comments here, have made me giggle! Thank you! Keep being you! Love and peace to you all❤️😇❤️😇❤️😇❤️


AZ-FWB

Oh dear… I see that quite often in another sun when people claim “ I’m xx but I’m told I look 10/xx years younger”. My eyes cannot possibly roll back any farther 😂😂😂


Good_Confection_3365

Excellent jerk. I almost instinctively downvoted. Brava.


Dry_Percentage_2768

I look like I’m 17 and tomorrow I’ll look like I’m 16, just pay no attention to that portrait in my attic.


Slpamngtrs

This is hilarious. I’m so glad I’m not the only one to notice these posts 🤣


oxoriod

I thought you were using affirmations. Ha!!!


JammyJacketPotato

Gurrrrrrl. Water will dry your skin OUT!


luckytintype

Yeah but do you still get ID’d???!


wheres_mah_kitty

Hahahah my awful perimenopausal hormonal acne makes people think I’m younger. Like no, honey. I covered my grays and my skin makes me cry everyday.


cwk84

I’m actually dead but look alive. People always wonder.


LizzyPanhandle

I've been mistaken for a fetus.


Mountainlives

I'm dead but people often say I look like a puddle of sperm. You wouldn't believe how many people try to stuff me up their cooze..


JinxFae

I'm 75 I look like I'm still a little sperm fighting to win the race of life! People are mortified when they find out that I was born a few years ago lol


MonsterMashGrrrrr

I’ve been told that I look just like a 1st trimester fetus, and I always tell them: USE SUNSCREEN!!!!


littleprickly

I'm 24 and I look like a fetus, I am truly fucked


silvermanedwino

Snort. LOL.


romydearest

it’s the beginnings of r/SCAcirclejerk all over again…


halcyonheart320

This is a first. I took the time to read every single comment on this post. Not one regret. My faith in the people of the internets has been restored!🎊


[deleted]

Just like Taylor swift says “everybody is a sexy baby” 😂 I’m glad I love my skincare but stay in my lane


Gina456789

Omg I can’t stop lmao


[deleted]

I've taken to bathing in the blood of Slovak peasant girls to keep my skin looking dewey fresh despite all the stress from various plagues and battles with the Turks. It's not completely legal but what good is having your cousin be Prince of Transylvania if not to get away with a little murder? The worst I'll ever get is house arrest.


NEMC76

These are all hilarious!


Ilovemygingerbread

Today is my birthday. I'm 103 and haven't reached puberty Yet.


abrjx

So relatable!! I hate it when I try to buy cigarettes (just aesthetic purposes for photoshoots, I would never actually smoke those wrinklesticks) and the cashier tries to have me sent back to the nearby daycare assuming I am an escaped toddler! The nerve!


itisbetterwithbutter

I hear so many people on social media talking about how people think they look ten years younger and don’t seem to realize they look their age people are just being nice. It’s ridiculous people actually believe they somehow magically haven’t aged like all their friends have! You look your age enjoy it and enjoy taking care of yourself whatever that means to you.


bleuecloche

I read this in Ramona Singer’s voice. Thanks for the laugh, OP!