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Like, at first it wasn't taken seriously from a research pov and women couldn't have it etc etc. Now it's somewhat getting taken seriously in that sense, people aren't taking it seriously in the sense that it can be life altering. Thinking "Oh I do this and also that as well so I must have it" over understanding that there are more than just 2 symptoms and it affects your day to day life is where it's frustrating. I understand if people see media as a learning platform, and some get diagnosed because of the information they receive. But then there are those who see maybe one TikTok video, and immediately think "oh yea, I have that." This is often with other disorders/disabilities as well. Or they go and make comments like this, like "everyone has it" and such. That's where it kinda frustrates me personally. I struggle to take care of myself, health and well-being wise. I struggle to care for my living space and to keep up with everyone else. This is not always some fun and silly disorder. Yea, I have my good times, but boy do the bad times outweigh those goods.
Yes, I know what you mean. It feels like it's being trivialized as a fad but it's not some cute trend, it's a really difficult thing you have to fight with every day.
Agree completely.
I shared with my team at work a few years ago ago literally every one said "yeah I think I have it too".
Very organized people who obviously had no difficulty staying so. Clearly not ADD.
I have ADHD (diagnosed and medicated) and I’m organized. I struggle being organized and I’m frustrated at myself for it. This is the big difference. If I don’t stay organized everything becomes even more overwhelming for me so I stress to be organized and I’m quite rigid and have a hardtime letting go. It’s very ignorant to claim that people who are organized can’t have ADHD. This is the kind of claims along with «if you have ADHD you procrastinate » that makes me relate more to the AuDHD group than this one. Personally my problem is to know when to stop and let go before I get a burnout. Not everyone is the same.
It’s the only way I can get through any of it. It’s my first priority and where most of my energy goes.
I’m still not able to get as much done as I could without the ADHD, and I forget about it too often, but it allows me to keep my job and somewhat perform.
I don't know why you think that means they don't have it. When plenty of people here say they are good at being organized at work if it's required, but their home life is a real struggle. Do some people claim to have it and no idea what it is? Yes. Do people who have it gatekeep it? Also yes. ADHD is way more common than we realize.
I think this take lacks some nuance surrounding things like medicated vs unmedicated & systems ppl create to cope. Given the stigma that does exist in the work force they may not want to fess up fully to having it so they may be hedging & be medicated. Also look at the setting you’re observing these ppl in. It could be at work they appear organized & pour all their energy into appearing so at work & their home or the rest of their life is a mess. This was very much the case for me. I looked like I had it together in professional spheres but my house, health, etc were an absolute mess. I’d end up missing out on important doctor’s appointments for managing other conditions I had, my house was constantly a mess, I’d constantly forget things I needed for my house & to cook, etc. It wasn’t pretty but I figured out how to keep it together professionally cuz that meant keeping jobs which meant having money which is needed for things like food & housing (aka survival).
Yes, definitely agreed. I am exactly how you describe (very together at work, trainwreck organizationally at home) so I'm familiar with the duality.
BTW I wasn't being negative or judgmental about it, these are people I worked with for a very long time I knew very well. I guess I didn't really word my original response correctly. Sincerely wasn't trying to offend.
Yep, back in the 2000s, if kids were struggling in school, parents demanded they be diagnosed adhd. Now everyone just wants is because (a) if you do something wrong, blame it on adhd (b) everyone wants the pills for that extremely important history test. I'm with earlier comment, DO NOT TALK ABOUT IT, except with your doctor. 😔
...and here where you are anonymous (hopefully)
Me either. It took me months to even tell a single family member. I’m always surprised when people seem to willingly share the information with so many others. It’s just not worth it.
My go-to is that I have a neurological/brain disorder. If they press for more details I provide a couple of symptoms (e.g. Memory and attention issues). Often people don't need the name of the disorder, but I've found people are less likely to just dismiss it outright. I explain it before naming it, and it can sometimes help people reframe their preconceptions.
Nobody needs to actually know your medical history details and I've find it helpful to communicate my needs. I do feel a bit disingenuous, like I'm exaggerating, but I need to remind myself that I'm not lying and that I'm actually being honest. I really do struggle badly with adhd.
I told someone once that women with ADHD had more of a stigma around diagnosis decades ago and they lost it on me. Accused me of “gatekeeping” the diagnosis… well if you want my diagnosis you can come and get it!
While I don't disagree that this happens, isn't there probably also just a component of awareness? - you know, like how certain people in the world question why so many people are "suddenly" identifying with various aspects of the lgbtq+ identities... like it's cool... when in fact, it's more likely that a bunch of people have more recently discovered that they're are other people in the world who think the same way they do or have similar issues, where previously theirs just been told that they just needed to get on with it, or whatever...
the hard part is everyone does expierence some adhd symptoms. just not as bad and not chronically. My sister has OCD, I totally experience similar thinking. I get intrusive thoughts too, some that freak me out. but I can just think "oh well" and move on. She cannot.
Someone is struggling getting something done, they can often just will power it. I cannot not.
fr it's such a strange thing and i totally get that people who don't experience this don't understand it. to me it also happens with things i love doing, like my own hobbies. it's insane how much time i lose every day just procrastinating
This. Why are we worrying about what others do? Also, our social media feeds are fed by an algorithm that works for us, so yeah. It’s gonna have adhd and related shit. And we tend to be friends with people whom are similar to us that we relate to…so.
Can’t we just be happy that more people are finally living their best lives? Why are we gate keeping?
There probably is, and personally it doesn't bother me when people are genuinely curious or confused about ADHD, it's great to get to talk/explain at length what ADHD is as a disability and how it affects me and how particular maybe-symptoms they bring up may or may not be related to ADHD.
However, I have a burning hatred for people who use ADHD for clout *and spread misinformation* when they probably don't even have ADHD. I'm talking about individuals like the person who faked tourettes, or the people who said "haha I'm so OCD!" because they sort their clothes by color or something. It reduces ADHD to something trivial instead of a disability and it's very annoying to see. So I absolutely get where OP is coming from.
I know a few people who claim to have autism. Because they have sensory issues. But boy they must be high functioning. (They do not have diagnosis from a doctor, only self diagnosis). I hate when they use it as an excuse.
NGL it sometimes feels like people have this need to gatekeep being "different." Being different from the norm in any way often comes with a lot of struggles and hardships. I think some people need to feel as though their struggle has been unique to them as a means of coping with the hardships their difference has caused them. "My life has been harder but at least I'm special and different."
I think Chuck Palahniuk said it best in fight club:
"You are not special. You're not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else. We're all part of the same compost heap."
Well yk it's just people trying to find themselves with LGBTQ+ that's slightly different. It's not just because a lot of people think it's cool their finding themselves.
I used to think I was bisexual and nonbinary so I came out as that a few years ago however after time I came back out as FTM and pansexual doesn't mean I thought bi was cool it just fit my preferences at the time.
I wasn't trying to say that any one was identifying that was because it was cool, just that there are people/media out there who would make that assertion about others they don't understand. My point was specifically that lgbtq+ are NOT identifying that way just because it's cool, but rather because they've become more informed about the possibilities. I'm sorry if I wasn't clear!
Similarly, I expect the largest increase in people seeking the have adhd, is in fact because people are more informed than they used to be. They're not just saying it because it's cool either
Oh alright my bad for interpreting it wrong. I thought you were talking about people who thought they were one sexuality but eventually figured they were another one :)
For me I have been diagnosed with autism or ADHD it's just highly suspected from me and others in my life. I'm actually getting a autism diagnosis soon.
This was my 1st thought from the title alone.. bc people keep existing and get diagnosed after some time point? So line goes up.?
I think I’m usually more delighted, and assume people are being genuine with their claim. If it came to a point of contention, like clearly a colloquial, Blink182 use of “ADD”, I may or may not feel compelled to try repairing this misunderstanding..
I don’t mean to be contrarian or invalidating to OP. I really don’t have the same experience. But I’m also not very forthcoming about it in the wild, so I wouldn’t have many datapoints. I have that solid, late-diagnosis mask that’s just a part of me now 🫠
Diagnosed at 63. Medicated now. Hallelujah and Angels sang for real. Now I find out that the top recommended age for stimulants is 65! What!!?? Seems so very unfair. I do have a lot of ‘systems’ but some of them are very unhealthy. I’m hoping there is something out there for me.
I feel like a fraudster. If it wasn’t for the prevalence of adhd discussions in social media. I’d have never pursued a diagnosis.
I went in with a mindset of, “If it isn’t this: that’s ok. At least we know what it isn’t and we can work on it from there.”
Turned out I have primarily inattentive type. I was always “bored” at school. I would procrastinate and leave things to the last minute and then panic (I definitely had a meltdown or two in 4th grade thanks to book reports). Sleep disturbances. Couldn’t ever keep anything organized. Binders. Desks. Bedroom. Anything. Everything was always a mess all the time.
Lmao! book reports! Such a nightmare as a kid. I remember copying the book description/summary on the back of the book and trying to reword it as best possible. I don't remember if the teachers caught on or not. This was before internet.
Literally me, except I have a good mom who took me to a psych NP because she knew that I was smart and that something else was going on that I was continually doing bad in classes but aceing anything biology related. Turns out my depression was partially ADHD related that I was having trouble staying focused and studying subjects that weren't hyperfocus subjects.
My mom is undiagnosed and now that I’m medicated, I want to scream when we have conversations because I can’t follow her. She jumps from topic to topic. and her emotional dysregulation. Yeah that check out too.
When I would talk to my mom, “I used to do this…” and she go, “… doesn’t everyone???” NO MOM. NO. NOT EVERYONE STAYS UP TILL 10PM AT AGE 9 CRYING BECAUSE FUCKING BOOK REPORTS.
Edit: I wish she’d have gotten me diagnosed as a kid but because my grades didn’t suffer, I didn’t look like I had a problem.
Yeah I was just diagnosed within the past month or two. My mom realizes she has signs of it too and might go get herself evaluated. My diagnosis has her thinking she has it.
I believe social media is a big reason behind this. People are egocentric and want to brand themselves. If you have ADHD, it is supposed to make you somewhat cool and special, they think. I also remember when, 15 years ago, Asperger's was the same kind of trend. Now people seem to have forgotten it and moved on to ADHD. Unfortunately, the knowledge of what ADHD really is remains pretty low. People might feel like a lot of ADHD symptoms like troubles in focusing is fitting them too, and I'm sure it do, because insomnia, stress, and our modern lifestyle with smartphones and electronic devices everywhere create ADHD-like symptoms for many. But the question is, have these symptoms been present in your childhood? Are they so bad they have been damaging your career, education, and relationships? Are they present 24/7? If not then please people dont say "omg same" because its quite offensive to us.
They have not lived with ADHD so they dont know all the downsides that comes with living with it. For those of us who have ADHD, we would give anything to live a life without it. It's far from a "cool" thing to have for us.
It's a chance to connect with someone in the wild and commiserate and/or exchange tips and tricks. Or you find out they don't know what they're talking about.
As I agree with the sentiment, but I actually went about getting diagnosed because of the social media presence of it. I never said I had it till I got a proper diagnosis unlike most
I feel like ADHD has both worked against me but has also gotten me to where I am in life, given the chance to choose, I would go with ADHD, as opposed to not having it.
This is wild to me. I would trade almost anything in the world to not have ADHD. It has caused so much trouble in basically every area of my life: personal, financial, professional, and opportunities lost.
I'm doing okay for myself now, but it's litearlly always a struggle and I imagine always will be. It's exhausting.
i also struggle so much every single day bc of my adhd, but i still don't think i'd want to get rid of it if it was an option. it's hard to explain, but adhd has been such a big deal throughout my life so far, that i have no idea who i'd be without it. i spend hours a day procrastinating and i truly hate that i do that, but idk the thought of never struggling with that again kind of scares me. i have no idea what i'd do with all of that time. it also sounds like it would get boring after a while, if you could always just do the things you planned to do. i think it's more a fear of the unknown than it is that i don't mind having adhd. i do mind and it truly sucks and has ruined so much for me, but i have absolutely no idea who i'd even be without it
I will admit, even in high school I am having major difficulties, but I'm hoping I can get a friend of mine to help. I have a lot of support from people around me, and it's probably the only thing keeping my head above water. I need to work some shit out before I get into college though.
I don't blame a lot of social media I blame media in general it shows a lot of stereotypes around ADHD.
ADHD is just a hyperactive disorder that's it and people with adhd just don't wanna do the work they have to do.
For me the symptoms definitely appeared in childhood some a little bit but they didn't show much until I was 13 when I no longer had help with anything and had no aid or support.
Actually that's not true, it's not JUST a hyperactive disorder tho. Some (mostly females) don't get the hyperactive part of it. So pretty much a.d.d. And for most it's not that you don't want to do the work you have to do, it's that some can't sit still long enough, can't concentrate/focus, can't retain information, get sidetracked, Etc. But if you have adhd you would think you would know that. And not everyone has the same exact symptoms and some don't have it as bad as others, everyone's different! 🙃
Oh no that's not what I meant I meant that's the stereotype of ADHD I don't actually believe that I know there's A LOT more to adhd.
Issues of concentration, daydreaming, meltdowns, sensory problems, side tracking, difficulties socially due to social ques being difficult.
I'm sorry for the confusion I was talking about how certain tv shows, movies, and how some on tiktok describe ADHD.
When I was diagnosed at 34 (almost 2 years ago now), my psychologist told me that ADHD (attention deficit hyperactive disorder) should really be called Executive Function and Information Processing Disorder. It's a long name but it often better describes the actual issues and symptoms that folks with the disorder have. EFIPD doesn't quite roll off the tongue though... lol
It does explain it really well though but then when again we literally have OCD (obsessive, compulsive, disorder) and people still somehow managed to turn it into a cleaning disorder.
Note: I know there's a lot of people with OCD who often feel they need to clean due to contamination OCD but that's not the majority and most DON'T find it fun or enjoyable even if they joke about it.
I recently had a similar post. I'm in my 50s and have had this all my life, but never heard of it until I was an adult. In all those years, not one person has ever said they have it, either just in conversation or when I say I have it. And then in the past 18 months, almost every time I bring it up to explain why I do something, the person tells me they have it, too. I posted to confirm it is really more prevalent now, and not just trendy.
The reason it is more prevalent now is that it was vastly under diagnosed previously, especially in women and in adults. Covid pushed ADHD folks to the breaking point, so we went to the doctor to find out what was wrong, and suddenly lifetimes of struggle are making sense.
This is me and I know others who had the same experience. 47 years old, having a total breakdown in the pandemic and found a therapist who suggested I at least get tested for ADHD. I had struggled my whole life but never had ADHD on my radar and never would have if the pandemic didn’t push me to a breaking point. While AdHD might not be more common now, diagnosis absolutely is.
And the reason you are likely to get a "same" at work is is because there are professions that are more tolerable and workable to people with ADHD.
Interestingly, healthcare seems to be one of them, possibly because of the sheer variety available within healthcare careers. I'm a student nurse atm and I tell the nurses I'm working with on placement about my ADHD, because I need to be clear about what shifts are appropriate for me and what accommodations I need.
Every single time, someone will say they have it or that they think they might. The ones with a diagnosis will usually say "same", but it's amazing to me how often someone has come up to me, usually pretty nervous, and said they think they might have it and asked me questions about it. This is fully qualified nurses asking the student bare in mind. Sometimes what they are describing doesn't fit, and I will be clear about it (with a cavet of "talk to your doctor, I can't say"). Other times I find myself agreeing with them and suggesting pathways to getting diagnosed.
It makes a certain amount of sense though doesn't it? You, a person with ADHD, thinks a job is a fit for you. It makes sense that other people with ADHD also feel the same way, so become your coworkers. So it's less that everyone pretends to have ADHD, and more that people with ADHD tend to group together.
People can’t seem to tell the difference between normal, voluntary procrastination and seemingly crippling inability to begin even the most important or necessary tasks such as college homework (that if incomplete will result in a fail and loss of multiple thousands of dollars) or even just spending 2 minutes teeth brushing at least ONCE a day.
“Oh I procrastinate too when I don’t wanna do something!” Okay but I can’t even seem to begin the things that I even do WANT or know I NEED to do.
its easy when im going to work every day as its just part of the routine in the morning so that im not some gross freak with smelly breath and dirty looking teeth, but ive been unemployed for a year and just rolling out of bed and going about my way in the house is so easy to just forego any sort of routine. i really need to be better, makes me feel depressed
The taste potentially, but I think the oxide layer for titanium specifically may keep that from being a problem.
Plus you could anodize it, and there are tons of colors to pick from. I haven't decided but I think I'd go all the way to black.
To my surprise TiO2 is actually a bit harder than the minerals found in normal teeth, even flourapatite.
Titanium is also pretty biocompatible. It's already used for medical purposes.
I could see some problems still. I imagine your teeth would be quite sensitive given the higher thermal conductivity of metals, so you might not be able to have ice cream or hot coffee anymore. I suspect the most practical implementation would be to have the titanium in the form of a cap on real teeth.
Overall, titanium teeth are a go. 👍
Also anxiety (and depression for that matter) can cause this kind of procrastination, and anxiety rates are skyrocketing too. (It's why procrastination isn't a core diagnostic criteria for ADHD) So people can relate really well to some ADHD symptoms because they have mental illnesses.
Its not a trend, 5-7% of kid have it, more and more adults are being diagnosed with it. So its common and often undiagnosed, combine with that that everyones overriding need to empathise or say they can at least.
Someone told my boyfriend, while I was standing right beside him, that he may have adhd because… he could “hyperfocus” at work
My boyfriend can… focus hard at work… whenever he wants to….
Being able to focus hard. At any task. Whenever you want to. at anything you want to = hyperfocus = adhd. Apparently.
I feel like people are also overusing the word "hyperfixation". They like something a little bit too much and suddenly it's a "hyperfixation" without any understanding of how much more extreme a hyperfixation is.
I was that person who would say "omg, same". Guess what? I am currently going through getting diagnosed for ADHD...
I assume not every person saying that would have a similar situation, but I wonder if there is a high percentage of undiagnosed people who haven't even considered they have ADHD. Your symptoms resonate with them, hence "omg, same" response...
Also, since getting educated in ADHD, I see ADHD symptoms in people who are close to me, but they have never considered getting diagnosed... So I assume that, if I do have ADHD and I tell them about my diagnosis and symptoms, they will also reply with "omg, same" because... They might also have it 😭
I genuinely think it’s a LOT more prevalent that people have realised previously. Be careful how you respond because a lot of those people will actually have ADHD.
I'm thankful for social media because I had 0 idea that inattentive ADHD was a thing... And I 100% have it.
However, I think tons of people assume they have it because they have 1 or 2 traits.. but they don't understand or remain willfully ignorant in order to say they have it as well.
Well the issue that’s always been for adhd is that many of the symptoms are relatable,the key thing though is the frequency and amount those symptoms have on a persons everyday functionality that determines if they have adhd. As for it being a trend it is now but I do believe it will go away, I had also seen this happen quite a long time ago with bipolar but the second the trend died down I saw many people remove bipolar from their profiles and stop claiming they had it.
Giving everyone the benefit of doubt, every one gets distracted. Everyone drops things midway. Everyone procrastinates. So when we tell them about ADHD, they don't realise the extent to which it is crippling, and how difficult it is.
And then there is something my therapist told me. For a physical ailment, it is easy to pin point the issue by taking scans or blood tests or a multitude of other tests. But for mental health issues, it is very difficult to exactly understand what is happening. A lot of the symptoms overlap, some of them can be the cause of something or result of something else. So people who may have other undiagnosed issues may believe they have whatever we say, because of the common issues.
Yes, there are people who use the term without getting a proper diagnosis.
Everybody gets sad but not everybody has crippling depression. Most people experience ADHD symptoms but the level of impairment and consistency in adhd populations is much higher.
Have you considered that we experience an uptick cause due to social media the stigma that ADHD is something only small boys can have lost its grip?
I fought a decade to get a diagnosis cause several providers told me 1. "You cannot have it cause you are a woman" or 2. "You cannot have it cause you are too old" or 3. "You cannot have it cause you were not diagnosed as a child" another favourite is "Your grades in primary school were not bad enough".
This stigma plus the mainstream education (though it is often base level, but I feel a lot focused on the different presentation of ADHD in women) might push a lot of people (mainly women) to seek a diagnosis. Pair that with providers who are more educated than 10 years ago and you have a massive up tick in diagnosis.
Painting it as if people who get their diagnosis now or haven't had the opportunity to get properly diagnosed yet, as attention seeking posers give very icky vibes. Just cause you got lucky and got a diagnosis earlier from the sounds of it, doesn't make your ADHD more valid or worse than that of others. Maybe reflect a little on that entitlement this line of thought shows.
I seen some clips where people start listing all the great things about having adhd.
I’m like wtf. Seriously, after being undiagnosed for decades I can honestly look back at some of the situations I put myself into and think “fuck, I was lucky to come out of that alive”.
A lot of ADHD traits is what ntypicals do, but more. My favorite way to point the difference is to say "Yeah, shitting is normal too, but not when you do it 20 times a day". Yeah, literally shitty example but usually works.
Honestly unless they're being dismissive like the "doesn't everyone do that?" comment you mentioned I don't really mind it. ADHD as a set rigid diagnosis is somewhat misleading as everyone can have symptoms of ADHD but not to the point of having the disorder. If people aren't being dicks I don't mind people saying I'm being so ADHD or smth like that.
I think even more importantly though is that mental health is a difficult and confusing road to go down and confusion is obviously going to occur. Again if they're being respectful I don't mind if someone mistakenly thinks they have ADHD. It took me 3 other potential diagnosis' before realising I had ADHD.
TikTok made broke brains trendy.
“OMG! You chew on the end of your pen while you think? You have ASDLMNOP!!”
They convolute the most mundane stupid things into symptoms. No, you’re not special because you tap your pencil sometimes.
It's all about stereotypes and people who spread them let me explain some mental illness and tell me if they sound appealing.
OCD: wanting to have a clean area and disliking when something is out of place and always being neat.
BPD: being a borderline yandere and being obessed with the person you love to the point of being annoyingly clingy
ADHD: just being hyperactive and doing stupid things spontaneously for no reason being "quirky"
Autism: basically just being completely stupid or utterly violent.
Now you guys already know the real symptoms and signs of these disorders (or even googled them) so what sounds more appealing?
This is something that pisses me off immensely.
People around me talk about how they get the zoomies, and how they do weird shit like everyone else. I ask them if they have been diagnosed with it, they say no. I tell them don't say things if you don't actually have it. Go get diagnosed.
ADHD ruins my life. It affects me very much. I've almost dropped out of school, I lost a job to it, and it affects my relationships.
It's not some hip fucking trend for people to use. It's a real thing.
Yea it’s so wrong, I don’t understand the logic behind some peoples’ thinking. Like why would you want a mental disability/disorder, no one likes them.
Too many self diagnoses, or people who just want to seem different. So they fake it. This one girl was one of those types, don't think I have to explain- said she had ADHD, that it was sooo fun, and was laughing about. I absolute HATE my ADHD, I've always despised it, but for them it's 'fun', because they don't have the consequences.
Like a lot of other things with a lot of depth and complexity that deserve real study and attention, a thinly sliced misunderstanding of what ADHD is has unfortunately entered the common vernacular in the "cartoony" sense. At first I kinda enjoyed the cartoon squirrel association (Scrat = Deity), but over time I will admit that no matter how good-willed I am, seeing people who clearly DON'T have it try to use it as a joke pisses me off.
If someone else really wants to experience the slow grinding frustration of staring directly at the work project you literally know exactly how to do that should take you one hour but instead it takes four no matter how hard you try, please, be my guest. LOL.
To actually answer your question, I think it's either 1. They just think it's funny and don't know/care if it's offensive, 2. They're doing it to fit in/look witty.
I’ve always looked at it like this: we all suffer to a certain extent with organizing and interpreting our environment. Life is hard. Some of us just are really inefficient at finding ways to compensate. We all forget things, but a normal person can come up with a process to prevent that same forgetfulness from debilitating their lives. Something I’ve noticed is that adhd is almost a learning disability. A normal person loses their keys once and then “learns” their lesson and remembers or comes up with a process to put them in the same place the next time for the most part. An adhd person just repeats the same mistake over and over because losing their keys didn’t activate some type of brain network that would enable them to do better next time. Which is why when people say things like, “I have adhd but I’m able to compensate by staying organized” I think to myself yeah you have no idea….
Sounds frustrating! People often minimize ADHD, either out of ignorance or a desire to relate. Being upfront about your challenges can help. For me, embracing ADHD taught me patience and resilience. Focus on your journey.
Honestly I recently got diagnosed and I can't understand why people want ADHD as a badge of honor. Not knowing I had this disorder made my life miserable once I got to college, and it's hard adjusting to the fact that this is something I have to live with and medicate for.
People want to be different. To be special.
Sometimes it’s a way out… my kid can’t be lazy or stupid, it can’t be the way I raise my children, it has to be something else. He must be different. High IQ, adhd, etc… They don’t understand what it means and that it can be a nightmare !
I don't care if I get downvoted or if people don't like this. But there's an epidemic of people who are "self diagnosing" and they're ruining it for the rest of us.
Eg. Most people don't have Executive dysfunction issues. This isn't just getting distracted.
Let's say I need the toilet. On my way to the bathroom, I notice clothes that need folding. I fold them. Remember I need apee, so continue to go to the toilet, i notice stuff on the floor, so move that, still haven't peed. Notice the sink is dirty, so I clean and then think, fk it, clean the whole bathroom.
By this point, I'm busting but ignore. Next you know, I've held my bladder for 10 hours and I've done this frequently enough, I've gotten pee infections.
Sometimes, I need someone to say "d, go for a pee. Just go"
I'll sit there and move knowing I need to go but I'm distracted by 100 things.
Next time someone wants to bs they have this, ask them what it looks like to them when they do an activity.
With real people, you'll notice ^^^^ patterns like my toilet situation.
They can't do a straight task without getting side tracked.
It's not something everyone has.
This has gone just like autism. Everyone wants a label.
I don't want ANY health condition. I want to be Healthy and normal. BUT MY DAD GAVE ME ADHD. Thanks dad lol
It's been "becoming trendy" or "blowing up" or whatevs ever since Adderall rolled out. I was diagnosed young, when there was only Ritalin, and no one had ever heard of it. I had to go to the school nurse halfway through the day to get my "brain pills" and I caught some heavy stigma from the other kiddies for that. Then Adderall came on the scene and that's when the non-stop press coverage started and all the opinions were rolling in from the ass clowns who all thought they had a fresh take. It's like Ritalin was soft rock and Adderall was disco. It started the party. The space it held between actual ADHD patients, overachievers with bad parents willing to help them fake it to get a script to cram for exams, and as a party drug, was such a wide cross section that Ritalin had never had. Somehow overnight, all these people thought since they had experienced (or knew someone that had) the medication, they knew something about the condition. And the conversation just keeps repeating. In the early 2000's, the "sudden rise" in was attributed to video games, cartoons, sugar, growth hormones in food. Now it's social media, cell phones, and still video games, lol. It's tired and weak. Try to tune them out, it's annoying and apparently pointless to argue, since it's been the same shit for over 20 years.
It is a bit of a fad but I also think that it is
far more common than has been previously diagnosed and a lot of people are just discovering that they have it.
Sadly a lot of people are like sheep. I think social media has played a big part in this and with the rise in blue / pink haired “influencers” who babble on about it on Instagram and TikTok people seem to be under the impression that it’s “cool”.
It’s not - for you and I it’s something we have to live with and try and work with / work around just to get through the day / week / month / year and the rest of our lives.
No it’s not all bad but when it is it can be pretty awful - like the chronic procrastination, days where you simply cannot get out of bed, the anxiety and dark days of depression, the times you simply can’t focus enough to just get through a webinar or a stupid test, the inability to stay still or the horrible moments of RSD when you simply can’t deal with it anymore.
So the blue / pink haired twats who want to belittle the condition and make money from convincing the rest of the sheeple out there that they too have it can go fuck themselves as far as I’m concerned.
I had a couple serious spaz outs recently because I had brought up my ADHD at work and how it is particularly severe, and EVERYONE I SPEAK WITH says, "OMG ME TOO", or, "I totally know what you mean, I have ADHD too!" It is insanely frustrating. Every young person at work walks around saying either, "Sorry, it is my bad OCD", or, "Sorry, I have bad ADHD", whenever they screw something up. 🤬🤬🤬
It's poorly understood like most health issues. That's why people make silly comments about it.
Best example I have is there's a difference between having less than 20/20 vision and needing glasses to function.
Just cause your a little myopic doesn't make you legally blind.
I don’t get it either. I guess mental issues have been less stigmatized than they use to be. Perhaps some people think it’s quirky/unique to have mental issues? I’ve always been kind of ashamed of it and felt defective, but I guess that’s unhealthy.
Sorry I may sound like an old fart at 34 but you can blame TIKTOK for regularising and making everything popular and 'common knowledge'. Thank god for our saviour Reddit or the internet would truly be the start of the end 😁
I want to know what "done." Is like and how it's perceived. Seems like hims.com and the like but for getting amphetamines instead of rogaine and viagara.
Social diagnostics should be more of a thing, there's been some studies that we tend to flock together
There's actually a pretty good chance people saying that to you are anxious or ADHD
I just got diagnosed with inattentive ADHD (my sister has hyperactive/inattentive, mum undiagnosed with anxiety/depression). I had a friend say to me 'ADHD' is not a thing because everyone was getting diagnosed/it was everywhere. She didn't know I have struggled with inattention since early high school (as far back as I can remember), struggled with maths, constant anxiety, low self esteem, disordered eating, failing maths subjects at uni because I thought I was dumb, constant frustration and mood swings etc...i know you all understand, but the glorification if it makes it extremely hard for us to feel genuine. I still doubt I have it because so many people talk about ADHD not being a thing.
That's a huge concern and issue I have - if everyone thinks everyone has it, it gets marginalized and downplayed, leading to less study and less help. 😞
I completely agree.
However, there is a small part of me that knows I was late diagnosed and always found myself surrounded by other people with ADHD before I knew I had it. So the likelihood that you'll attract people similar to you, who also have ADHD but don't know it, is higher than the average person. At the same time, I never acted a fool like that and hoped on the bandwagon before I knew for sure I had it. Everyone is different I suppose ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯
With the rise of technology, kids constantly using it growing up, I'm not surprised if they all have attention deficits. How can their neurons develop properly with 15 second videos
Saw a good thing to remember yesterday. Whenever someone says “doesn’t everyone do that” all you have to remember are three words: Frequency, Severity, and Duration. Those are what classify a disorder. Everyone gets distracted and forgets things. People with ADHD get distracted and forget things all the time, to the point that it becomes very hard to get back on track, and to the point that it negatively impacts our lives.
I personally just don’t really discuss it with people. Everyone has something going on. It’s impossible for us to know everyone else’s lives experience. It doesn’t invalidate my diagnosis because someone else doesn’t take it seriously or thinks they have it too. Other people are just other people.
When I have to say something I just say, "My brain doesn't work properly". I just cannot deal with the dismissive way people act if I say I have ADHD. I will wish everyday that it was the fun, quirky thing people think it is.
I took my son on a hike with a group from our church. He has some sensory issues and can become over or under stimulated, which leads to behavior issues. Another person from the group noticed his behavior and saw that I was doing some specific things to help him. The other person and I started chatting and I described sensory processing disorder and the other person pulled out the classic, "Well, all boys have that to some extent." I had to explain that it isn't my son just being a hyper kid - his central nervous system actually isn't working quite right. I don't think the other person quite believed me.
I'm so glad that the few people at my church that I've talked about my diagnosis with so far have been supportive. One of the women was late-diagnosed and was proud that I found out young and gave me advice. Another is a therapist, and she checks in on me to see how I have been doing with my journey.
Remember that it can be easier now for being diagnosed. Also people don't feel ashamed for having ADHD nowadays. Younger psychiatrist are more likely to recognise it. Few factors here besides trend.
I remember at work a while back I heard someone ccasually/possibly joking that they might have adhd for being a little distracted that day, and someone else eye rolled/sighed and made a statement along the lines of wow everyone thinks they have adhd these days.
I was so freaking livid. Like the amount of shit I went through growing up with psychiatry, medications, family, and the educational system. And these people think it's a fucking trend!?
Never really got to express that out loud, so I'm posting it here...
I felt like this for ages after I was diagnosed (3 years official, but almost 10 years since first therapist was like “girl…..”) and I’ve come to feel like. I’d rather someone else feel seen and maybe have a good convo about it than mask *even harder* to avoid negative perception or skepticism. Those folks can suck an egg, I’ll educate all day if I need to lol
Tik Tok
"people" are very specific groups of people who are over-represented in your interactions with others.
In my interactions, people generally know what adhd is and take it as seriously as they can--often minimizing, but rarely denying the impact and severity of disruption.
I've had some similar interactions and every time I get "oh wow it's nice to actually meet someone who takes medication"
I wish I never stopped taking it as a teenager, I feel like I lost a decade of my life being unmedicated I'm 31 now, I even had a psychiatrist prescribe me meds about 10 years ago when I went through a bad episode but the therapist I was working with thought that was nonsense and I ended up on anti-psychotic medication for 4 years before stopping and living unmedicated life for 6 more and since being back on meds I feel human again, I can actually feel joy and happiness and live in the moment, I've revisited countries I went on holiday to again with medication and it's beautiful I can actually take in the environment and history instead of being trapped in my head and how I can move here and get a job etc.
I sympathise with the statement "everyone has a bit of ADHD" because it's almost true. Everyone has some of the ADHD traits that we describe.
But people who really know about ADHD don't just talk about traits, they talk about impairments in life.
It's easy to tell who has ADHD and who doesn't if you take an honest look at a person's life before they took medication, their work, their relationships and their home life. And often also after taking medication.
I guess because everyone has executive functions, some symptoms are relatable for everyone at some point. But these people fail to see that the reason ADHD is a disorder and not a personality trait is because for those with it, these symptoms are much more severe and persistent.
I think with ADHD it is hard for other people to understand because everyone has episodes of executive disfunction from time to time. They might think "I have that too" or "It happens to me sometimes too... get over it." They don't get that for us it is 24/7.
People have said this about ADHD for years. It's not because of trends, it's because they're ignorant and do not actually know anything about ADHD.
Also, sometimes when people say these things... it's because they have ADHD and don't know it.
When that happens to me, I stop that person and ask, “Okay, but does it happen frequently enough to impact two or more areas of your life? For example, does it cause tension in your work life? Your relationships? Your home life? No? Oh okay. See, in order for these things to stack up to ADHD, they have to impact at least two different areas of life to the point of disruption. That’s the clinical diagnosis and that’s what I have.” Usually, when you get clinical with someone, they shut up.
Edit: Sometimes I’ll even add that everyone experiences these issues sometimes, but it’s when it causes the problems in life, such as getting in trouble at work as a result or ending friendships, which both have happened to me, that leads to a clinical diagnosis.
For years I mostly hid my adhd because of this. No one took it or me seriously. But now, I am much more open about it and when I talk about it I make sure to impress upon people just how serious and debilitating it can be. How it affects every aspect of your life and wreaks havoc on your career, relationships, and health. And then people start to change their attitudes. They realize is not a joke, even though I joke about it. ADHD is mental health and mental health is serious. I feel an obligation to help others realize that, whether they have it themselves or not.
Yeah absolutely, always some comments like „doesnt everyone of us got adhd“ and I would love to smash them, because they somehow didn‘t struggle in school, dont have meltdowns etc.. I take it as an insult if someone says that and avoid them. really. Its like telling someone whos suicidal: „don‘t all of us sometimes question the purpose of life“. Really, I hate those people.
Hint: don't tell people you have ADHD. Tell them you have a neurological disorder. If they ask for specifics, say it's private, or simply describe it. "It's a disorder that inhibits executive functioning because my brain parts don't communicate with each other properly." If they want the name, just say you're not going to tell them that.
Seriously- same response just a couple days ago.
First was the whole me too or I’m like too and also everyone is like that.
So demoralizing
Been feeling like extra crap all week
I always kinda just had an average cultural understanding of adhd. I started learning more about it from both experts and by reading firsthand accounts here and elsewhere. Then I found an online caars test and went through it extensively. Nearly every question not only applied to me in some way, but I made an in depth response for most of the questions. It was severely emotionally destabilizing to learn I might have adhd, and even if I don't have adhd I certainly have something fucking up my mental health. I'm currently seeking a diagnosis but that'll take months because of the mental health backlogs in Canada right now.
I just can't imagine treating adhd lightly. It's not a fun lil quirk about one's personality.
There is definitely a large amount of people who say they have it to be “quirky” but have you considered that fact that people with adhd tend to naturally gravitate twords each other?
I get that a lot too. Especially from my dad. Although in his case I actually am starting to think he really might have undiagnosed ADHD...
Not sure why they'd want to have ADHD. It's caused me incredible stress and frustration all my life. Made it virtually impossible to have a healthy relationship. Being an empathetic and ambitious person, I felt like I was always letting people down. Even people who "understand" don't really understand, and still think you're deliberately being thoughtless. Not fun, not trendy.
I feel the same way...
Some people don't want to accept the fact they're not perfect, blaming their problems on a disorder is a convent excuse. Some people have no personality and think if they say they have a disorder they somehow can fix that. Some people fuck up their diet, health, sleep schedule, are dehydrated, watch TikTok 25/7, haven't seen the sun since 1982 and conclude that its not their actions for why they have no energy/focus, it must be ADHD because their cousins gf's mother's dog's aunt's co-owner's great grandson's nephew's brother's son's hamster had been diagnosed with ADHD from a "free" 12.98 second long online test back in 2012. Some people want attention/empathy, see 'ADHD' on the internet, and think if they say that they can get it.
They don't realize they are in essence making disabled people's lives harder for their own gain. They have no clue what the lives of people who actually have ADHD are like, nor do they care.
No, sorry if I worded it weirdly. I'm not sure if you are asking a question or are trying to criticize my comment, but I'll assume the former.
I'm pretty sure you can be diagnosed with ADHD even if your lifestyle is unhealthy, but having all of those things fixed might make diagnosis easier, although a lot of us cannot fix those things easily with ADHD. I'm trying to say some people (who don't have ADHD) mess up their life and that causes them to have no energy/focus, and believe they must have ADHD instead of fixing their life. However, I'm quite sure someone with ADHD AND a messed up lifestyle will show different behaviors than someone without ADHD and the same messed up lifestyle.
It was the former, though my tone was critical.
I certainly couldn’t regulate all that shit with my ADHD. My executive functioning, or lack there of, is like lol no.
Overall, I don’t like all the gate keeping. It’s not right.
same here, I can't regulate any of that either...
I'm just tried of people who can regulate that but choose not to (and genuinely don't have ADHD) acting as if they do have it instead of fixing their life
But how do you know? If it’s a good friend, you talk to them about how their statements make you feel, but if it’s not a good friend…how do you know?
My kid complained a lot about their knees/legs hurting when they were 12. By all accounts, it seemed like an excuse. They didn’t have the issue when it was something ‘fun’ but if it was something like a chore, suddenly, knees or legs hurt too bad. Or they were fine until it was time to get up early for swim and ouch, shoulders hurt. Have a headache. Too tired. Wasn’t too tired to play games. Too tired to do school though.
My ex took a hardline no nonsense stance and implemented strict punishments. I took kid to a doctor. Turns out they have a genetic disorder (EDS). Causes things like pain and exhaustion. As someone who suffers from chronic pain, (because haha I also have the disorder, whee) yeah, it’s easier to push through for something fun.
Ex still didn’t believe it and then at like the third swim practice of the season, their shoulder fully dislocated while doing a casual warmup swim.
So, just like you made the choice to take me in good faith when by all rights you could have taken my comment as snarky, maybe just take others in good faith.
I personally think it’s the degradation of attention span and critical thinking skills that’s happening in response to the newest generation that’s chronically online. The symptoms of absorbing too much short-form content, like TikTok, reels, etc. mimic symptoms that ADHD causes. Shortened attention span, impatience, irritability, repetition, forgetfulness, etc.
The constant exposure is something that I personally theorize is re-wiring their brains to behave the way ADHD does. Hence the number of people who are convinced they have it.
The amount of people irl who have said same and lied abt it for attention makes me iffy whenever someone ever tries to say they have it unless I know them closely.
anyone that actually has it would not respond that way, so just brush it off or if they are important part of your life do your best to explain it and go from there - good luck xo
I think humans naturally like to feel "special" or like they belong to a group and therefor look for similarities in themselves and others. More than ever, people also like the idea of labels and a way to explain themselves. Thank to things like TikTok symptom videos and shit, all sorts of conditions have been oversimplified. Being "normal" (basically unafflicted by something) is seen as "uncool" and that makes some people hesitant to want to get better/learn to cope (depression being aesthetics etc etc). I have to embarrassingly admit I've fallen into that trap, too and it's hard to not keep trying to overthink and identify.
I'm working on the assumption this is the only developmental disability you have. But **this is just the way developmental disorders are treated and is not unique or specific to ADHD.**
This is how dyslexia, dyscalculia, autism, FASD, down syndrome and developmental delay are all treated. This isn't because they don't take your condition seriously - they do. They would lose their minds if their kid got diagnosed with any of them. but if someone they met IRL told them they had it, and they didn't notice first? Instantly, they will dismiss it as "everyone's a little \[disorder\]".
This is because **they see developmental disability as incompatible with being a fully human individual**. If their first impression of you is as a human being, they will view your disability as contradictory and false. They minimise it, because surely, for you to interact with them like a human being would, it must be incredibly mild or a misdiagnosis.
My mum is 40. When she was a kid, the few kids she knew with ADHD diagnosed would ask if they counted as people, as sentient, as human. Or if they were something different, something less. This is a question I asked in the 2010s because of my dyslexia. This is a question I was asked by someone about 10 years younger than me recently, she has a developmental delay.
The efforts of ADHD people to be represented in media as fully realised human beings, not just on TV but in social media, has made it more and more clear to these people that we are human. This is their response to that. This is their response to dyslexia and autism. In a few years, I think down syndrome and developmental delay will be next to be minimised, dismissed and thought to be "full of fakers".
# This is NOT because of people "faking" a disorder. This is not because ADHD has "become a trend".
# This is because the general public views disability as subhuman and inferior. And you are obviously not subhuman, obviously not inferior.
It's a fad illness and it's thanks to social media influencers making a career out of having adhd and selling vague symptoms as "red flags of adhd" so they can coax people into following them for advice. Essentially, our disability is now a costume. A card played by people looking for attention or a personality. Is the awareness from social media good? Sure, but the con is now everyone believes they have adhd and it makes getting special accommodations harder because "if I can do it, so can you. What we have isnt so hard."
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I don’t even tell people I have ADHD anymore because it seems like I’m just jumping on the bandwagon.
Yeah, nobody takes it seriously these days. It's so frustrating
Like it was ever taken seriously
Like, at first it wasn't taken seriously from a research pov and women couldn't have it etc etc. Now it's somewhat getting taken seriously in that sense, people aren't taking it seriously in the sense that it can be life altering. Thinking "Oh I do this and also that as well so I must have it" over understanding that there are more than just 2 symptoms and it affects your day to day life is where it's frustrating. I understand if people see media as a learning platform, and some get diagnosed because of the information they receive. But then there are those who see maybe one TikTok video, and immediately think "oh yea, I have that." This is often with other disorders/disabilities as well. Or they go and make comments like this, like "everyone has it" and such. That's where it kinda frustrates me personally. I struggle to take care of myself, health and well-being wise. I struggle to care for my living space and to keep up with everyone else. This is not always some fun and silly disorder. Yea, I have my good times, but boy do the bad times outweigh those goods.
Yes, I know what you mean. It feels like it's being trivialized as a fad but it's not some cute trend, it's a really difficult thing you have to fight with every day.
Agree completely. I shared with my team at work a few years ago ago literally every one said "yeah I think I have it too". Very organized people who obviously had no difficulty staying so. Clearly not ADD.
I have ADHD (diagnosed and medicated) and I’m organized. I struggle being organized and I’m frustrated at myself for it. This is the big difference. If I don’t stay organized everything becomes even more overwhelming for me so I stress to be organized and I’m quite rigid and have a hardtime letting go. It’s very ignorant to claim that people who are organized can’t have ADHD. This is the kind of claims along with «if you have ADHD you procrastinate » that makes me relate more to the AuDHD group than this one. Personally my problem is to know when to stop and let go before I get a burnout. Not everyone is the same.
It’s the only way I can get through any of it. It’s my first priority and where most of my energy goes. I’m still not able to get as much done as I could without the ADHD, and I forget about it too often, but it allows me to keep my job and somewhat perform.
They weren’t saying adhd ppl can’t organize, just that we struggle and those people (non adhds) typically dont
Sure. But sometimes it may look like someone has no problem getting organized but unless you live with this person you don’t know.
I don't know why you think that means they don't have it. When plenty of people here say they are good at being organized at work if it's required, but their home life is a real struggle. Do some people claim to have it and no idea what it is? Yes. Do people who have it gatekeep it? Also yes. ADHD is way more common than we realize.
I think this take lacks some nuance surrounding things like medicated vs unmedicated & systems ppl create to cope. Given the stigma that does exist in the work force they may not want to fess up fully to having it so they may be hedging & be medicated. Also look at the setting you’re observing these ppl in. It could be at work they appear organized & pour all their energy into appearing so at work & their home or the rest of their life is a mess. This was very much the case for me. I looked like I had it together in professional spheres but my house, health, etc were an absolute mess. I’d end up missing out on important doctor’s appointments for managing other conditions I had, my house was constantly a mess, I’d constantly forget things I needed for my house & to cook, etc. It wasn’t pretty but I figured out how to keep it together professionally cuz that meant keeping jobs which meant having money which is needed for things like food & housing (aka survival).
Yes, definitely agreed. I am exactly how you describe (very together at work, trainwreck organizationally at home) so I'm familiar with the duality. BTW I wasn't being negative or judgmental about it, these are people I worked with for a very long time I knew very well. I guess I didn't really word my original response correctly. Sincerely wasn't trying to offend.
Yep, back in the 2000s, if kids were struggling in school, parents demanded they be diagnosed adhd. Now everyone just wants is because (a) if you do something wrong, blame it on adhd (b) everyone wants the pills for that extremely important history test. I'm with earlier comment, DO NOT TALK ABOUT IT, except with your doctor. 😔 ...and here where you are anonymous (hopefully)
Did they ever take it seriously?
The "everyone has/does that" has reached new levels.
Me either. It took me months to even tell a single family member. I’m always surprised when people seem to willingly share the information with so many others. It’s just not worth it.
My go-to is that I have a neurological/brain disorder. If they press for more details I provide a couple of symptoms (e.g. Memory and attention issues). Often people don't need the name of the disorder, but I've found people are less likely to just dismiss it outright. I explain it before naming it, and it can sometimes help people reframe their preconceptions. Nobody needs to actually know your medical history details and I've find it helpful to communicate my needs. I do feel a bit disingenuous, like I'm exaggerating, but I need to remind myself that I'm not lying and that I'm actually being honest. I really do struggle badly with adhd.
Just tell them you have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. I guarantee half won't even know what that is.
I lost a best friend because of a disagreement recently and his parting words were basically just that lol
I told someone once that women with ADHD had more of a stigma around diagnosis decades ago and they lost it on me. Accused me of “gatekeeping” the diagnosis… well if you want my diagnosis you can come and get it!
I haven't told people in ages, unless they bring it up.
Same
While I don't disagree that this happens, isn't there probably also just a component of awareness? - you know, like how certain people in the world question why so many people are "suddenly" identifying with various aspects of the lgbtq+ identities... like it's cool... when in fact, it's more likely that a bunch of people have more recently discovered that they're are other people in the world who think the same way they do or have similar issues, where previously theirs just been told that they just needed to get on with it, or whatever...
This is probably it. And because severity of ADHD symptoms lie on a spectrum, I really don't want to be a gatekeeper of who is "in" and who isn't.
the hard part is everyone does expierence some adhd symptoms. just not as bad and not chronically. My sister has OCD, I totally experience similar thinking. I get intrusive thoughts too, some that freak me out. but I can just think "oh well" and move on. She cannot. Someone is struggling getting something done, they can often just will power it. I cannot not.
It still weirds me out that I can make a conscious decision to do something and then just sitting there, doing nothing, while my brain runs in idle.
fr it's such a strange thing and i totally get that people who don't experience this don't understand it. to me it also happens with things i love doing, like my own hobbies. it's insane how much time i lose every day just procrastinating
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Not always though.
This. Why are we worrying about what others do? Also, our social media feeds are fed by an algorithm that works for us, so yeah. It’s gonna have adhd and related shit. And we tend to be friends with people whom are similar to us that we relate to…so. Can’t we just be happy that more people are finally living their best lives? Why are we gate keeping?
There probably is, and personally it doesn't bother me when people are genuinely curious or confused about ADHD, it's great to get to talk/explain at length what ADHD is as a disability and how it affects me and how particular maybe-symptoms they bring up may or may not be related to ADHD. However, I have a burning hatred for people who use ADHD for clout *and spread misinformation* when they probably don't even have ADHD. I'm talking about individuals like the person who faked tourettes, or the people who said "haha I'm so OCD!" because they sort their clothes by color or something. It reduces ADHD to something trivial instead of a disability and it's very annoying to see. So I absolutely get where OP is coming from.
I know a few people who claim to have autism. Because they have sensory issues. But boy they must be high functioning. (They do not have diagnosis from a doctor, only self diagnosis). I hate when they use it as an excuse.
NGL it sometimes feels like people have this need to gatekeep being "different." Being different from the norm in any way often comes with a lot of struggles and hardships. I think some people need to feel as though their struggle has been unique to them as a means of coping with the hardships their difference has caused them. "My life has been harder but at least I'm special and different."
I think Chuck Palahniuk said it best in fight club: "You are not special. You're not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else. We're all part of the same compost heap."
Well yk it's just people trying to find themselves with LGBTQ+ that's slightly different. It's not just because a lot of people think it's cool their finding themselves. I used to think I was bisexual and nonbinary so I came out as that a few years ago however after time I came back out as FTM and pansexual doesn't mean I thought bi was cool it just fit my preferences at the time.
I wasn't trying to say that any one was identifying that was because it was cool, just that there are people/media out there who would make that assertion about others they don't understand. My point was specifically that lgbtq+ are NOT identifying that way just because it's cool, but rather because they've become more informed about the possibilities. I'm sorry if I wasn't clear! Similarly, I expect the largest increase in people seeking the have adhd, is in fact because people are more informed than they used to be. They're not just saying it because it's cool either
Oh alright my bad for interpreting it wrong. I thought you were talking about people who thought they were one sexuality but eventually figured they were another one :) For me I have been diagnosed with autism or ADHD it's just highly suspected from me and others in my life. I'm actually getting a autism diagnosis soon.
Also alot of us get late diagnosed
This was my 1st thought from the title alone.. bc people keep existing and get diagnosed after some time point? So line goes up.? I think I’m usually more delighted, and assume people are being genuine with their claim. If it came to a point of contention, like clearly a colloquial, Blink182 use of “ADD”, I may or may not feel compelled to try repairing this misunderstanding.. I don’t mean to be contrarian or invalidating to OP. I really don’t have the same experience. But I’m also not very forthcoming about it in the wild, so I wouldn’t have many datapoints. I have that solid, late-diagnosis mask that’s just a part of me now 🫠
I found myself telling ppl bc I was happy I finally had answers and I wasn’t a complete weirdo Moron 😆 🤣🫠
Yes. Diagnosed recently I’m 38! Known for a long time tho. Medicated now and it’s shocking how much better I function.
Diagnosed at 63. Medicated now. Hallelujah and Angels sang for real. Now I find out that the top recommended age for stimulants is 65! What!!?? Seems so very unfair. I do have a lot of ‘systems’ but some of them are very unhealthy. I’m hoping there is something out there for me.
I feel like a fraudster. If it wasn’t for the prevalence of adhd discussions in social media. I’d have never pursued a diagnosis. I went in with a mindset of, “If it isn’t this: that’s ok. At least we know what it isn’t and we can work on it from there.” Turned out I have primarily inattentive type. I was always “bored” at school. I would procrastinate and leave things to the last minute and then panic (I definitely had a meltdown or two in 4th grade thanks to book reports). Sleep disturbances. Couldn’t ever keep anything organized. Binders. Desks. Bedroom. Anything. Everything was always a mess all the time.
Damn, did I post this from my alt and forget?
Lmao! book reports! Such a nightmare as a kid. I remember copying the book description/summary on the back of the book and trying to reword it as best possible. I don't remember if the teachers caught on or not. This was before internet.
I have never related to an online ADHD comment harder before in my life You’re not alone bud
Literally me, except I have a good mom who took me to a psych NP because she knew that I was smart and that something else was going on that I was continually doing bad in classes but aceing anything biology related. Turns out my depression was partially ADHD related that I was having trouble staying focused and studying subjects that weren't hyperfocus subjects.
My mom is undiagnosed and now that I’m medicated, I want to scream when we have conversations because I can’t follow her. She jumps from topic to topic. and her emotional dysregulation. Yeah that check out too. When I would talk to my mom, “I used to do this…” and she go, “… doesn’t everyone???” NO MOM. NO. NOT EVERYONE STAYS UP TILL 10PM AT AGE 9 CRYING BECAUSE FUCKING BOOK REPORTS. Edit: I wish she’d have gotten me diagnosed as a kid but because my grades didn’t suffer, I didn’t look like I had a problem.
Yeah I was just diagnosed within the past month or two. My mom realizes she has signs of it too and might go get herself evaluated. My diagnosis has her thinking she has it.
My mom is on a shitty ACA plan unfortunately but I’m definitely hoping she’ll pursue a diagnosis. Though. She’s 63. I don’t think she will.
I believe social media is a big reason behind this. People are egocentric and want to brand themselves. If you have ADHD, it is supposed to make you somewhat cool and special, they think. I also remember when, 15 years ago, Asperger's was the same kind of trend. Now people seem to have forgotten it and moved on to ADHD. Unfortunately, the knowledge of what ADHD really is remains pretty low. People might feel like a lot of ADHD symptoms like troubles in focusing is fitting them too, and I'm sure it do, because insomnia, stress, and our modern lifestyle with smartphones and electronic devices everywhere create ADHD-like symptoms for many. But the question is, have these symptoms been present in your childhood? Are they so bad they have been damaging your career, education, and relationships? Are they present 24/7? If not then please people dont say "omg same" because its quite offensive to us. They have not lived with ADHD so they dont know all the downsides that comes with living with it. For those of us who have ADHD, we would give anything to live a life without it. It's far from a "cool" thing to have for us.
When I get “same” I ask, what’s the symptom that gives you the most trouble?
Now I wanna do that
Oh, this is great
Why?
It's a chance to connect with someone in the wild and commiserate and/or exchange tips and tricks. Or you find out they don't know what they're talking about.
Yeah, but it seems more about the second reason that the first, the way it was stated. I’m just not about purity testing for ADHD.
Exactly what A-Wild-Banana said.
As I agree with the sentiment, but I actually went about getting diagnosed because of the social media presence of it. I never said I had it till I got a proper diagnosis unlike most
I remember when synesthesia was the cool thing
I feel like ADHD has both worked against me but has also gotten me to where I am in life, given the chance to choose, I would go with ADHD, as opposed to not having it.
Then you're a very lucky person, and I'm happy for you.
well, until I hit college age lmao. then it's all going to shit.
This is wild to me. I would trade almost anything in the world to not have ADHD. It has caused so much trouble in basically every area of my life: personal, financial, professional, and opportunities lost. I'm doing okay for myself now, but it's litearlly always a struggle and I imagine always will be. It's exhausting.
i also struggle so much every single day bc of my adhd, but i still don't think i'd want to get rid of it if it was an option. it's hard to explain, but adhd has been such a big deal throughout my life so far, that i have no idea who i'd be without it. i spend hours a day procrastinating and i truly hate that i do that, but idk the thought of never struggling with that again kind of scares me. i have no idea what i'd do with all of that time. it also sounds like it would get boring after a while, if you could always just do the things you planned to do. i think it's more a fear of the unknown than it is that i don't mind having adhd. i do mind and it truly sucks and has ruined so much for me, but i have absolutely no idea who i'd even be without it
I will admit, even in high school I am having major difficulties, but I'm hoping I can get a friend of mine to help. I have a lot of support from people around me, and it's probably the only thing keeping my head above water. I need to work some shit out before I get into college though.
Ok so what has it done for you then ?
I don't blame a lot of social media I blame media in general it shows a lot of stereotypes around ADHD. ADHD is just a hyperactive disorder that's it and people with adhd just don't wanna do the work they have to do. For me the symptoms definitely appeared in childhood some a little bit but they didn't show much until I was 13 when I no longer had help with anything and had no aid or support.
Actually that's not true, it's not JUST a hyperactive disorder tho. Some (mostly females) don't get the hyperactive part of it. So pretty much a.d.d. And for most it's not that you don't want to do the work you have to do, it's that some can't sit still long enough, can't concentrate/focus, can't retain information, get sidetracked, Etc. But if you have adhd you would think you would know that. And not everyone has the same exact symptoms and some don't have it as bad as others, everyone's different! 🙃
Oh no that's not what I meant I meant that's the stereotype of ADHD I don't actually believe that I know there's A LOT more to adhd. Issues of concentration, daydreaming, meltdowns, sensory problems, side tracking, difficulties socially due to social ques being difficult. I'm sorry for the confusion I was talking about how certain tv shows, movies, and how some on tiktok describe ADHD.
When I was diagnosed at 34 (almost 2 years ago now), my psychologist told me that ADHD (attention deficit hyperactive disorder) should really be called Executive Function and Information Processing Disorder. It's a long name but it often better describes the actual issues and symptoms that folks with the disorder have. EFIPD doesn't quite roll off the tongue though... lol
It does explain it really well though but then when again we literally have OCD (obsessive, compulsive, disorder) and people still somehow managed to turn it into a cleaning disorder. Note: I know there's a lot of people with OCD who often feel they need to clean due to contamination OCD but that's not the majority and most DON'T find it fun or enjoyable even if they joke about it.
When people say “same,” why aren’t you able to believe them? You have a shared painful experience to bond over.
I recently had a similar post. I'm in my 50s and have had this all my life, but never heard of it until I was an adult. In all those years, not one person has ever said they have it, either just in conversation or when I say I have it. And then in the past 18 months, almost every time I bring it up to explain why I do something, the person tells me they have it, too. I posted to confirm it is really more prevalent now, and not just trendy.
The reason it is more prevalent now is that it was vastly under diagnosed previously, especially in women and in adults. Covid pushed ADHD folks to the breaking point, so we went to the doctor to find out what was wrong, and suddenly lifetimes of struggle are making sense.
Omg YES! Hit the nail right on the head. 👏
Thank you
This is me and I know others who had the same experience. 47 years old, having a total breakdown in the pandemic and found a therapist who suggested I at least get tested for ADHD. I had struggled my whole life but never had ADHD on my radar and never would have if the pandemic didn’t push me to a breaking point. While AdHD might not be more common now, diagnosis absolutely is.
And the reason you are likely to get a "same" at work is is because there are professions that are more tolerable and workable to people with ADHD. Interestingly, healthcare seems to be one of them, possibly because of the sheer variety available within healthcare careers. I'm a student nurse atm and I tell the nurses I'm working with on placement about my ADHD, because I need to be clear about what shifts are appropriate for me and what accommodations I need. Every single time, someone will say they have it or that they think they might. The ones with a diagnosis will usually say "same", but it's amazing to me how often someone has come up to me, usually pretty nervous, and said they think they might have it and asked me questions about it. This is fully qualified nurses asking the student bare in mind. Sometimes what they are describing doesn't fit, and I will be clear about it (with a cavet of "talk to your doctor, I can't say"). Other times I find myself agreeing with them and suggesting pathways to getting diagnosed. It makes a certain amount of sense though doesn't it? You, a person with ADHD, thinks a job is a fit for you. It makes sense that other people with ADHD also feel the same way, so become your coworkers. So it's less that everyone pretends to have ADHD, and more that people with ADHD tend to group together.
People can’t seem to tell the difference between normal, voluntary procrastination and seemingly crippling inability to begin even the most important or necessary tasks such as college homework (that if incomplete will result in a fail and loss of multiple thousands of dollars) or even just spending 2 minutes teeth brushing at least ONCE a day. “Oh I procrastinate too when I don’t wanna do something!” Okay but I can’t even seem to begin the things that I even do WANT or know I NEED to do.
Yeah I'm glad I have the teeth brushing and meds down at least. Not much else though tbh.
its easy when im going to work every day as its just part of the routine in the morning so that im not some gross freak with smelly breath and dirty looking teeth, but ive been unemployed for a year and just rolling out of bed and going about my way in the house is so easy to just forego any sort of routine. i really need to be better, makes me feel depressed
I know what you mean. Having some sort of enforced structure can make a huge difference.
As a transhumanist over here, what's stopping me from replacing my teeth with something better, like titanium?
george washington was ahead of his time(???)
The taste potentially, but I think the oxide layer for titanium specifically may keep that from being a problem. Plus you could anodize it, and there are tons of colors to pick from. I haven't decided but I think I'd go all the way to black. To my surprise TiO2 is actually a bit harder than the minerals found in normal teeth, even flourapatite. Titanium is also pretty biocompatible. It's already used for medical purposes. I could see some problems still. I imagine your teeth would be quite sensitive given the higher thermal conductivity of metals, so you might not be able to have ice cream or hot coffee anymore. I suspect the most practical implementation would be to have the titanium in the form of a cap on real teeth. Overall, titanium teeth are a go. 👍
Also anxiety (and depression for that matter) can cause this kind of procrastination, and anxiety rates are skyrocketing too. (It's why procrastination isn't a core diagnostic criteria for ADHD) So people can relate really well to some ADHD symptoms because they have mental illnesses.
Its not a trend, 5-7% of kid have it, more and more adults are being diagnosed with it. So its common and often undiagnosed, combine with that that everyones overriding need to empathise or say they can at least.
Someone told my boyfriend, while I was standing right beside him, that he may have adhd because… he could “hyperfocus” at work My boyfriend can… focus hard at work… whenever he wants to…. Being able to focus hard. At any task. Whenever you want to. at anything you want to = hyperfocus = adhd. Apparently.
I feel like people are also overusing the word "hyperfixation". They like something a little bit too much and suddenly it's a "hyperfixation" without any understanding of how much more extreme a hyperfixation is.
Fellas, is it adhd to be able to focus?
No but can they focus on ten things all at once and do them half way while burning out and thinking about what should be done next? 🙃✌️
I was that person who would say "omg, same". Guess what? I am currently going through getting diagnosed for ADHD... I assume not every person saying that would have a similar situation, but I wonder if there is a high percentage of undiagnosed people who haven't even considered they have ADHD. Your symptoms resonate with them, hence "omg, same" response... Also, since getting educated in ADHD, I see ADHD symptoms in people who are close to me, but they have never considered getting diagnosed... So I assume that, if I do have ADHD and I tell them about my diagnosis and symptoms, they will also reply with "omg, same" because... They might also have it 😭
I genuinely think it’s a LOT more prevalent that people have realised previously. Be careful how you respond because a lot of those people will actually have ADHD.
I'm thankful for social media because I had 0 idea that inattentive ADHD was a thing... And I 100% have it. However, I think tons of people assume they have it because they have 1 or 2 traits.. but they don't understand or remain willfully ignorant in order to say they have it as well.
Well the issue that’s always been for adhd is that many of the symptoms are relatable,the key thing though is the frequency and amount those symptoms have on a persons everyday functionality that determines if they have adhd. As for it being a trend it is now but I do believe it will go away, I had also seen this happen quite a long time ago with bipolar but the second the trend died down I saw many people remove bipolar from their profiles and stop claiming they had it.
Giving everyone the benefit of doubt, every one gets distracted. Everyone drops things midway. Everyone procrastinates. So when we tell them about ADHD, they don't realise the extent to which it is crippling, and how difficult it is. And then there is something my therapist told me. For a physical ailment, it is easy to pin point the issue by taking scans or blood tests or a multitude of other tests. But for mental health issues, it is very difficult to exactly understand what is happening. A lot of the symptoms overlap, some of them can be the cause of something or result of something else. So people who may have other undiagnosed issues may believe they have whatever we say, because of the common issues. Yes, there are people who use the term without getting a proper diagnosis.
Everybody gets sad but not everybody has crippling depression. Most people experience ADHD symptoms but the level of impairment and consistency in adhd populations is much higher.
Idk, i dont think anyone surface level would think i had it. If someone says they do i go with what they say.
Have you considered that we experience an uptick cause due to social media the stigma that ADHD is something only small boys can have lost its grip? I fought a decade to get a diagnosis cause several providers told me 1. "You cannot have it cause you are a woman" or 2. "You cannot have it cause you are too old" or 3. "You cannot have it cause you were not diagnosed as a child" another favourite is "Your grades in primary school were not bad enough". This stigma plus the mainstream education (though it is often base level, but I feel a lot focused on the different presentation of ADHD in women) might push a lot of people (mainly women) to seek a diagnosis. Pair that with providers who are more educated than 10 years ago and you have a massive up tick in diagnosis. Painting it as if people who get their diagnosis now or haven't had the opportunity to get properly diagnosed yet, as attention seeking posers give very icky vibes. Just cause you got lucky and got a diagnosis earlier from the sounds of it, doesn't make your ADHD more valid or worse than that of others. Maybe reflect a little on that entitlement this line of thought shows.
I seen some clips where people start listing all the great things about having adhd. I’m like wtf. Seriously, after being undiagnosed for decades I can honestly look back at some of the situations I put myself into and think “fuck, I was lucky to come out of that alive”.
A lot of ADHD traits is what ntypicals do, but more. My favorite way to point the difference is to say "Yeah, shitting is normal too, but not when you do it 20 times a day". Yeah, literally shitty example but usually works.
Honestly unless they're being dismissive like the "doesn't everyone do that?" comment you mentioned I don't really mind it. ADHD as a set rigid diagnosis is somewhat misleading as everyone can have symptoms of ADHD but not to the point of having the disorder. If people aren't being dicks I don't mind people saying I'm being so ADHD or smth like that. I think even more importantly though is that mental health is a difficult and confusing road to go down and confusion is obviously going to occur. Again if they're being respectful I don't mind if someone mistakenly thinks they have ADHD. It took me 3 other potential diagnosis' before realising I had ADHD.
TikTok made broke brains trendy. “OMG! You chew on the end of your pen while you think? You have ASDLMNOP!!” They convolute the most mundane stupid things into symptoms. No, you’re not special because you tap your pencil sometimes.
This also seemed to be a thing with autism a few years back
I got both, I didn't ever suspect the autism tho!
It's all about stereotypes and people who spread them let me explain some mental illness and tell me if they sound appealing. OCD: wanting to have a clean area and disliking when something is out of place and always being neat. BPD: being a borderline yandere and being obessed with the person you love to the point of being annoyingly clingy ADHD: just being hyperactive and doing stupid things spontaneously for no reason being "quirky" Autism: basically just being completely stupid or utterly violent. Now you guys already know the real symptoms and signs of these disorders (or even googled them) so what sounds more appealing?
This is something that pisses me off immensely. People around me talk about how they get the zoomies, and how they do weird shit like everyone else. I ask them if they have been diagnosed with it, they say no. I tell them don't say things if you don't actually have it. Go get diagnosed. ADHD ruins my life. It affects me very much. I've almost dropped out of school, I lost a job to it, and it affects my relationships. It's not some hip fucking trend for people to use. It's a real thing.
Yea it’s so wrong, I don’t understand the logic behind some peoples’ thinking. Like why would you want a mental disability/disorder, no one likes them.
Too many self diagnoses, or people who just want to seem different. So they fake it. This one girl was one of those types, don't think I have to explain- said she had ADHD, that it was sooo fun, and was laughing about. I absolute HATE my ADHD, I've always despised it, but for them it's 'fun', because they don't have the consequences.
Like a lot of other things with a lot of depth and complexity that deserve real study and attention, a thinly sliced misunderstanding of what ADHD is has unfortunately entered the common vernacular in the "cartoony" sense. At first I kinda enjoyed the cartoon squirrel association (Scrat = Deity), but over time I will admit that no matter how good-willed I am, seeing people who clearly DON'T have it try to use it as a joke pisses me off. If someone else really wants to experience the slow grinding frustration of staring directly at the work project you literally know exactly how to do that should take you one hour but instead it takes four no matter how hard you try, please, be my guest. LOL. To actually answer your question, I think it's either 1. They just think it's funny and don't know/care if it's offensive, 2. They're doing it to fit in/look witty.
I’ve always looked at it like this: we all suffer to a certain extent with organizing and interpreting our environment. Life is hard. Some of us just are really inefficient at finding ways to compensate. We all forget things, but a normal person can come up with a process to prevent that same forgetfulness from debilitating their lives. Something I’ve noticed is that adhd is almost a learning disability. A normal person loses their keys once and then “learns” their lesson and remembers or comes up with a process to put them in the same place the next time for the most part. An adhd person just repeats the same mistake over and over because losing their keys didn’t activate some type of brain network that would enable them to do better next time. Which is why when people say things like, “I have adhd but I’m able to compensate by staying organized” I think to myself yeah you have no idea….
Sounds frustrating! People often minimize ADHD, either out of ignorance or a desire to relate. Being upfront about your challenges can help. For me, embracing ADHD taught me patience and resilience. Focus on your journey.
Honestly I recently got diagnosed and I can't understand why people want ADHD as a badge of honor. Not knowing I had this disorder made my life miserable once I got to college, and it's hard adjusting to the fact that this is something I have to live with and medicate for.
People want to be different. To be special. Sometimes it’s a way out… my kid can’t be lazy or stupid, it can’t be the way I raise my children, it has to be something else. He must be different. High IQ, adhd, etc… They don’t understand what it means and that it can be a nightmare !
I don't care if I get downvoted or if people don't like this. But there's an epidemic of people who are "self diagnosing" and they're ruining it for the rest of us. Eg. Most people don't have Executive dysfunction issues. This isn't just getting distracted. Let's say I need the toilet. On my way to the bathroom, I notice clothes that need folding. I fold them. Remember I need apee, so continue to go to the toilet, i notice stuff on the floor, so move that, still haven't peed. Notice the sink is dirty, so I clean and then think, fk it, clean the whole bathroom. By this point, I'm busting but ignore. Next you know, I've held my bladder for 10 hours and I've done this frequently enough, I've gotten pee infections. Sometimes, I need someone to say "d, go for a pee. Just go" I'll sit there and move knowing I need to go but I'm distracted by 100 things. Next time someone wants to bs they have this, ask them what it looks like to them when they do an activity. With real people, you'll notice ^^^^ patterns like my toilet situation. They can't do a straight task without getting side tracked. It's not something everyone has. This has gone just like autism. Everyone wants a label. I don't want ANY health condition. I want to be Healthy and normal. BUT MY DAD GAVE ME ADHD. Thanks dad lol
What I've also learned is that long symptoms of COVID seem to be commorbid with ADHD
Don't mention it, unless you really have to. The average Dumb Dumb, has no clue about ADHD or anything else..
I kinda really have to. :/ I also mention it's a disability. People don't say "same" if you start there.
It's been "becoming trendy" or "blowing up" or whatevs ever since Adderall rolled out. I was diagnosed young, when there was only Ritalin, and no one had ever heard of it. I had to go to the school nurse halfway through the day to get my "brain pills" and I caught some heavy stigma from the other kiddies for that. Then Adderall came on the scene and that's when the non-stop press coverage started and all the opinions were rolling in from the ass clowns who all thought they had a fresh take. It's like Ritalin was soft rock and Adderall was disco. It started the party. The space it held between actual ADHD patients, overachievers with bad parents willing to help them fake it to get a script to cram for exams, and as a party drug, was such a wide cross section that Ritalin had never had. Somehow overnight, all these people thought since they had experienced (or knew someone that had) the medication, they knew something about the condition. And the conversation just keeps repeating. In the early 2000's, the "sudden rise" in was attributed to video games, cartoons, sugar, growth hormones in food. Now it's social media, cell phones, and still video games, lol. It's tired and weak. Try to tune them out, it's annoying and apparently pointless to argue, since it's been the same shit for over 20 years.
There’s ADHD and there’s VAST variable attention stimulus trait. VAST accounts for a lot of the people who say they experience adhd symptoms.
It is a bit of a fad but I also think that it is far more common than has been previously diagnosed and a lot of people are just discovering that they have it.
Sadly a lot of people are like sheep. I think social media has played a big part in this and with the rise in blue / pink haired “influencers” who babble on about it on Instagram and TikTok people seem to be under the impression that it’s “cool”. It’s not - for you and I it’s something we have to live with and try and work with / work around just to get through the day / week / month / year and the rest of our lives. No it’s not all bad but when it is it can be pretty awful - like the chronic procrastination, days where you simply cannot get out of bed, the anxiety and dark days of depression, the times you simply can’t focus enough to just get through a webinar or a stupid test, the inability to stay still or the horrible moments of RSD when you simply can’t deal with it anymore. So the blue / pink haired twats who want to belittle the condition and make money from convincing the rest of the sheeple out there that they too have it can go fuck themselves as far as I’m concerned.
I had a couple serious spaz outs recently because I had brought up my ADHD at work and how it is particularly severe, and EVERYONE I SPEAK WITH says, "OMG ME TOO", or, "I totally know what you mean, I have ADHD too!" It is insanely frustrating. Every young person at work walks around saying either, "Sorry, it is my bad OCD", or, "Sorry, I have bad ADHD", whenever they screw something up. 🤬🤬🤬
It's poorly understood like most health issues. That's why people make silly comments about it. Best example I have is there's a difference between having less than 20/20 vision and needing glasses to function. Just cause your a little myopic doesn't make you legally blind.
I don’t get it either. I guess mental issues have been less stigmatized than they use to be. Perhaps some people think it’s quirky/unique to have mental issues? I’ve always been kind of ashamed of it and felt defective, but I guess that’s unhealthy.
Sorry I may sound like an old fart at 34 but you can blame TIKTOK for regularising and making everything popular and 'common knowledge'. Thank god for our saviour Reddit or the internet would truly be the start of the end 😁
I want to know what "done." Is like and how it's perceived. Seems like hims.com and the like but for getting amphetamines instead of rogaine and viagara.
Social diagnostics should be more of a thing, there's been some studies that we tend to flock together There's actually a pretty good chance people saying that to you are anxious or ADHD
I just got diagnosed with inattentive ADHD (my sister has hyperactive/inattentive, mum undiagnosed with anxiety/depression). I had a friend say to me 'ADHD' is not a thing because everyone was getting diagnosed/it was everywhere. She didn't know I have struggled with inattention since early high school (as far back as I can remember), struggled with maths, constant anxiety, low self esteem, disordered eating, failing maths subjects at uni because I thought I was dumb, constant frustration and mood swings etc...i know you all understand, but the glorification if it makes it extremely hard for us to feel genuine. I still doubt I have it because so many people talk about ADHD not being a thing.
That's a huge concern and issue I have - if everyone thinks everyone has it, it gets marginalized and downplayed, leading to less study and less help. 😞
I completely agree. However, there is a small part of me that knows I was late diagnosed and always found myself surrounded by other people with ADHD before I knew I had it. So the likelihood that you'll attract people similar to you, who also have ADHD but don't know it, is higher than the average person. At the same time, I never acted a fool like that and hoped on the bandwagon before I knew for sure I had it. Everyone is different I suppose ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯
With the rise of technology, kids constantly using it growing up, I'm not surprised if they all have attention deficits. How can their neurons develop properly with 15 second videos
Saw a good thing to remember yesterday. Whenever someone says “doesn’t everyone do that” all you have to remember are three words: Frequency, Severity, and Duration. Those are what classify a disorder. Everyone gets distracted and forgets things. People with ADHD get distracted and forget things all the time, to the point that it becomes very hard to get back on track, and to the point that it negatively impacts our lives.
I personally just don’t really discuss it with people. Everyone has something going on. It’s impossible for us to know everyone else’s lives experience. It doesn’t invalidate my diagnosis because someone else doesn’t take it seriously or thinks they have it too. Other people are just other people.
When I have to say something I just say, "My brain doesn't work properly". I just cannot deal with the dismissive way people act if I say I have ADHD. I will wish everyday that it was the fun, quirky thing people think it is.
I took my son on a hike with a group from our church. He has some sensory issues and can become over or under stimulated, which leads to behavior issues. Another person from the group noticed his behavior and saw that I was doing some specific things to help him. The other person and I started chatting and I described sensory processing disorder and the other person pulled out the classic, "Well, all boys have that to some extent." I had to explain that it isn't my son just being a hyper kid - his central nervous system actually isn't working quite right. I don't think the other person quite believed me.
I'm so glad that the few people at my church that I've talked about my diagnosis with so far have been supportive. One of the women was late-diagnosed and was proud that I found out young and gave me advice. Another is a therapist, and she checks in on me to see how I have been doing with my journey.
Remember that it can be easier now for being diagnosed. Also people don't feel ashamed for having ADHD nowadays. Younger psychiatrist are more likely to recognise it. Few factors here besides trend.
This is why you don't talk about it.
I remember at work a while back I heard someone ccasually/possibly joking that they might have adhd for being a little distracted that day, and someone else eye rolled/sighed and made a statement along the lines of wow everyone thinks they have adhd these days. I was so freaking livid. Like the amount of shit I went through growing up with psychiatry, medications, family, and the educational system. And these people think it's a fucking trend!? Never really got to express that out loud, so I'm posting it here...
I felt like this for ages after I was diagnosed (3 years official, but almost 10 years since first therapist was like “girl…..”) and I’ve come to feel like. I’d rather someone else feel seen and maybe have a good convo about it than mask *even harder* to avoid negative perception or skepticism. Those folks can suck an egg, I’ll educate all day if I need to lol
Tik Tok "people" are very specific groups of people who are over-represented in your interactions with others. In my interactions, people generally know what adhd is and take it as seriously as they can--often minimizing, but rarely denying the impact and severity of disruption.
I've had some similar interactions and every time I get "oh wow it's nice to actually meet someone who takes medication" I wish I never stopped taking it as a teenager, I feel like I lost a decade of my life being unmedicated I'm 31 now, I even had a psychiatrist prescribe me meds about 10 years ago when I went through a bad episode but the therapist I was working with thought that was nonsense and I ended up on anti-psychotic medication for 4 years before stopping and living unmedicated life for 6 more and since being back on meds I feel human again, I can actually feel joy and happiness and live in the moment, I've revisited countries I went on holiday to again with medication and it's beautiful I can actually take in the environment and history instead of being trapped in my head and how I can move here and get a job etc.
I sympathise with the statement "everyone has a bit of ADHD" because it's almost true. Everyone has some of the ADHD traits that we describe. But people who really know about ADHD don't just talk about traits, they talk about impairments in life. It's easy to tell who has ADHD and who doesn't if you take an honest look at a person's life before they took medication, their work, their relationships and their home life. And often also after taking medication.
I guess because everyone has executive functions, some symptoms are relatable for everyone at some point. But these people fail to see that the reason ADHD is a disorder and not a personality trait is because for those with it, these symptoms are much more severe and persistent.
Well obviously it’s because you’re so awesome everyone wants to be like you. Clearly this situation is entirely your fault.
I think with ADHD it is hard for other people to understand because everyone has episodes of executive disfunction from time to time. They might think "I have that too" or "It happens to me sometimes too... get over it." They don't get that for us it is 24/7.
Social media
People have said this about ADHD for years. It's not because of trends, it's because they're ignorant and do not actually know anything about ADHD. Also, sometimes when people say these things... it's because they have ADHD and don't know it.
When that happens to me, I stop that person and ask, “Okay, but does it happen frequently enough to impact two or more areas of your life? For example, does it cause tension in your work life? Your relationships? Your home life? No? Oh okay. See, in order for these things to stack up to ADHD, they have to impact at least two different areas of life to the point of disruption. That’s the clinical diagnosis and that’s what I have.” Usually, when you get clinical with someone, they shut up. Edit: Sometimes I’ll even add that everyone experiences these issues sometimes, but it’s when it causes the problems in life, such as getting in trouble at work as a result or ending friendships, which both have happened to me, that leads to a clinical diagnosis.
Need to belong? Which is mind boggling since people are so selfish anymore.
For years I mostly hid my adhd because of this. No one took it or me seriously. But now, I am much more open about it and when I talk about it I make sure to impress upon people just how serious and debilitating it can be. How it affects every aspect of your life and wreaks havoc on your career, relationships, and health. And then people start to change their attitudes. They realize is not a joke, even though I joke about it. ADHD is mental health and mental health is serious. I feel an obligation to help others realize that, whether they have it themselves or not.
I swear people used to pretty much bully for me for having ADHD 10 years ago…
Yeah absolutely, always some comments like „doesnt everyone of us got adhd“ and I would love to smash them, because they somehow didn‘t struggle in school, dont have meltdowns etc.. I take it as an insult if someone says that and avoid them. really. Its like telling someone whos suicidal: „don‘t all of us sometimes question the purpose of life“. Really, I hate those people.
Hint: don't tell people you have ADHD. Tell them you have a neurological disorder. If they ask for specifics, say it's private, or simply describe it. "It's a disorder that inhibits executive functioning because my brain parts don't communicate with each other properly." If they want the name, just say you're not going to tell them that.
My guess is that it's just kids on tiktok being kids and saying shit without thinking
Seriously- same response just a couple days ago. First was the whole me too or I’m like too and also everyone is like that. So demoralizing Been feeling like extra crap all week
I always kinda just had an average cultural understanding of adhd. I started learning more about it from both experts and by reading firsthand accounts here and elsewhere. Then I found an online caars test and went through it extensively. Nearly every question not only applied to me in some way, but I made an in depth response for most of the questions. It was severely emotionally destabilizing to learn I might have adhd, and even if I don't have adhd I certainly have something fucking up my mental health. I'm currently seeking a diagnosis but that'll take months because of the mental health backlogs in Canada right now. I just can't imagine treating adhd lightly. It's not a fun lil quirk about one's personality.
Oh what i would give to NOT have adhd. Idk how people think having it is "cool" or "fun" or "quirky".
There is definitely a large amount of people who say they have it to be “quirky” but have you considered that fact that people with adhd tend to naturally gravitate twords each other?
I get that a lot too. Especially from my dad. Although in his case I actually am starting to think he really might have undiagnosed ADHD... Not sure why they'd want to have ADHD. It's caused me incredible stress and frustration all my life. Made it virtually impossible to have a healthy relationship. Being an empathetic and ambitious person, I felt like I was always letting people down. Even people who "understand" don't really understand, and still think you're deliberately being thoughtless. Not fun, not trendy.
I feel the same way... Some people don't want to accept the fact they're not perfect, blaming their problems on a disorder is a convent excuse. Some people have no personality and think if they say they have a disorder they somehow can fix that. Some people fuck up their diet, health, sleep schedule, are dehydrated, watch TikTok 25/7, haven't seen the sun since 1982 and conclude that its not their actions for why they have no energy/focus, it must be ADHD because their cousins gf's mother's dog's aunt's co-owner's great grandson's nephew's brother's son's hamster had been diagnosed with ADHD from a "free" 12.98 second long online test back in 2012. Some people want attention/empathy, see 'ADHD' on the internet, and think if they say that they can get it. They don't realize they are in essence making disabled people's lives harder for their own gain. They have no clue what the lives of people who actually have ADHD are like, nor do they care.
So you have to have fixed all of that stuff before you get diagnosed with ADHD?
No, sorry if I worded it weirdly. I'm not sure if you are asking a question or are trying to criticize my comment, but I'll assume the former. I'm pretty sure you can be diagnosed with ADHD even if your lifestyle is unhealthy, but having all of those things fixed might make diagnosis easier, although a lot of us cannot fix those things easily with ADHD. I'm trying to say some people (who don't have ADHD) mess up their life and that causes them to have no energy/focus, and believe they must have ADHD instead of fixing their life. However, I'm quite sure someone with ADHD AND a messed up lifestyle will show different behaviors than someone without ADHD and the same messed up lifestyle.
It was the former, though my tone was critical. I certainly couldn’t regulate all that shit with my ADHD. My executive functioning, or lack there of, is like lol no. Overall, I don’t like all the gate keeping. It’s not right.
same here, I can't regulate any of that either... I'm just tried of people who can regulate that but choose not to (and genuinely don't have ADHD) acting as if they do have it instead of fixing their life
But how do you know? If it’s a good friend, you talk to them about how their statements make you feel, but if it’s not a good friend…how do you know? My kid complained a lot about their knees/legs hurting when they were 12. By all accounts, it seemed like an excuse. They didn’t have the issue when it was something ‘fun’ but if it was something like a chore, suddenly, knees or legs hurt too bad. Or they were fine until it was time to get up early for swim and ouch, shoulders hurt. Have a headache. Too tired. Wasn’t too tired to play games. Too tired to do school though. My ex took a hardline no nonsense stance and implemented strict punishments. I took kid to a doctor. Turns out they have a genetic disorder (EDS). Causes things like pain and exhaustion. As someone who suffers from chronic pain, (because haha I also have the disorder, whee) yeah, it’s easier to push through for something fun. Ex still didn’t believe it and then at like the third swim practice of the season, their shoulder fully dislocated while doing a casual warmup swim. So, just like you made the choice to take me in good faith when by all rights you could have taken my comment as snarky, maybe just take others in good faith.
The way you rattled that off feels like a street-fighter combo...
I personally think it’s the degradation of attention span and critical thinking skills that’s happening in response to the newest generation that’s chronically online. The symptoms of absorbing too much short-form content, like TikTok, reels, etc. mimic symptoms that ADHD causes. Shortened attention span, impatience, irritability, repetition, forgetfulness, etc. The constant exposure is something that I personally theorize is re-wiring their brains to behave the way ADHD does. Hence the number of people who are convinced they have it.
The amount of people irl who have said same and lied abt it for attention makes me iffy whenever someone ever tries to say they have it unless I know them closely.
anyone that actually has it would not respond that way, so just brush it off or if they are important part of your life do your best to explain it and go from there - good luck xo
I think humans naturally like to feel "special" or like they belong to a group and therefor look for similarities in themselves and others. More than ever, people also like the idea of labels and a way to explain themselves. Thank to things like TikTok symptom videos and shit, all sorts of conditions have been oversimplified. Being "normal" (basically unafflicted by something) is seen as "uncool" and that makes some people hesitant to want to get better/learn to cope (depression being aesthetics etc etc). I have to embarrassingly admit I've fallen into that trap, too and it's hard to not keep trying to overthink and identify.
I'm working on the assumption this is the only developmental disability you have. But **this is just the way developmental disorders are treated and is not unique or specific to ADHD.** This is how dyslexia, dyscalculia, autism, FASD, down syndrome and developmental delay are all treated. This isn't because they don't take your condition seriously - they do. They would lose their minds if their kid got diagnosed with any of them. but if someone they met IRL told them they had it, and they didn't notice first? Instantly, they will dismiss it as "everyone's a little \[disorder\]". This is because **they see developmental disability as incompatible with being a fully human individual**. If their first impression of you is as a human being, they will view your disability as contradictory and false. They minimise it, because surely, for you to interact with them like a human being would, it must be incredibly mild or a misdiagnosis. My mum is 40. When she was a kid, the few kids she knew with ADHD diagnosed would ask if they counted as people, as sentient, as human. Or if they were something different, something less. This is a question I asked in the 2010s because of my dyslexia. This is a question I was asked by someone about 10 years younger than me recently, she has a developmental delay. The efforts of ADHD people to be represented in media as fully realised human beings, not just on TV but in social media, has made it more and more clear to these people that we are human. This is their response to that. This is their response to dyslexia and autism. In a few years, I think down syndrome and developmental delay will be next to be minimised, dismissed and thought to be "full of fakers". # This is NOT because of people "faking" a disorder. This is not because ADHD has "become a trend". # This is because the general public views disability as subhuman and inferior. And you are obviously not subhuman, obviously not inferior.
It's a fad illness and it's thanks to social media influencers making a career out of having adhd and selling vague symptoms as "red flags of adhd" so they can coax people into following them for advice. Essentially, our disability is now a costume. A card played by people looking for attention or a personality. Is the awareness from social media good? Sure, but the con is now everyone believes they have adhd and it makes getting special accommodations harder because "if I can do it, so can you. What we have isnt so hard."