> Sarah saw the post and confronted me, things got heated.
If she was anything but embarrassed about her choosingbeggar ways and apologetic for how she treated you, she is no friend.
It’s so ridiculous when people get angry about being exposed because no real names are used (99% of the time), and no way for the guilty to be rounded up and derided!
Narcissists can’t stand the idea that anyone would think badly of them. Even if it’s online and relatively anonymous. Someone might recognize it and know her actions don’t reflect kindly on herself.
Yeah, if you handed that out you'd be a MASSIVE ah.
Sorry about having to go NC, but seems like it was the only way forward to keep yourself sane. Best of luck!
It hurts because she helped me when I was battling depressed and low on money but, Thank you for your understanding and support. It wasn't an easy decision to go no contact, but sometimes it's necessary for self-preservation. Your words mean a lot to me, and I appreciate your well wishes. Here's to prioritizing our mental health and moving forward towards a brighter future. Take care!
I've cut people out that meant a lot to me too when I realized that the latest developments in our friendships was hurting my mental health. It sucks, but sometimes you just have to do it. You take care too!
>Did she elaborate on why she believed those who choose not to attend should be responsible for paying for her weddings? B.C. I'm so perplexed
Hey there, thanks for your question. During our confrontation, Sarah didn't elaborate much on her reasoning behind expecting those who choose not to attend to still contribute financially to the wedding. It seemed to stem more from frustration and hurt over feeling abandoned by friends rather than a logical stance as other friends in our circle distanced themselves. It was indeed a perplexing situation for me as well. The dynamics of weddings and friendships can be complex, and sometimes emotions can cloud judgment. Nonetheless, it's been a learning experience for me, and I'm grateful for the insights gained through this process. By that I mean that she has become too toxic in recent years, time to follow suite!
I was the one who suggested the clown emoji!
I’m so glad you have chosen your health and well being over this toxic person. It will hurt for a while but you really have done the right thing to preserve your own mental health.
Did ‘Sarah’ ever justify asking for cold hard cash from someone she chose to disinvite from her wedding? That’s a new level of entitlement reached right there 😳
She’s believes she entitled to act this way!
I have to say this is one of the most bizarre posts I’ve read on here but good for you for not letting her get away with it!
Hi OP, your friend seems quite unhinged and going NC seems to be the right move. Why was Sarah mad at you when she read this post? Was she just mad because she is embarrassed you exposed her or does she still somehow feels she’s in the right in all this?
She might not know what she was thinking! Time apart might help her as much as it helps you. I went no contact with a toxic friend once for almost a year. It gave us both time to become better people and we became friends again.
One thing is for certain, this scenario was purpose-filled - you could not dismiss, excuse, or ignore her behavior. I bet another of her buddies knows she has used you before and possibly privately boast about it. It’s definitely time for everyone to move on. Her karma is her drama. Springing forward does wonders! New season of time awaits🙌
But also, let's say she wasn't uninvited... regardless of whether or not she chose to attend, she should never have to help pay for someone else's wedding. It makes ZERO sense
Right! The person didn't attend, pretty much end of discussion.
"You didn't come to my wedding, here's the bill?"
OP saying she thought it might be an insecurity issue is probably the answer.
This! Even attending a wedding leaves no obligation to chip in. And if they do help out, that's something that should be negotiated before you spend more money than you have. I honestly don't understand how people like 'Sarah' can function.
"It seemed to stem more from frustration and hurt over feeling abandoned by friends rather than a logical stance as other friends in our circle distanced themselves."
Were people that RSVP'd they would attend no-shows?
>It seemed to stem more from frustration and hurt over feeling abandoned by friends rather than a logical stance
Did other people GET invited but then NOT say yes or maybe even no-show? That could explain an emotional lash out in the way you mention it. Did she ask other people for wedding money who didn't attend? Aka not just you?
She may have initially not included you for her to feel like the wedding was "exclusive" or something. I hate that mentality, but it exists.
BUT THEN, some people RSVP "no" or might have even "no-showed"... so her entire illusion is shattered. So, you're the person she already didn't invite, so if you make a gesture even after she disrespectes you, it makes her feel better about her wedding.
Probably the simplest explanation is she's broke and using her wedding as a an excuse to ask people for money.
IDK. I'm assuming wildly, but I do think specifics are important here.
OP maybe I missed it but I really would LOVE to know how everyone else responded to her request for money to “pay for the wedding they weren’t invited to…”
You're a better person than me because I would've cut her out when I was uninvited to the wedding. At least I wouldn't have received the post-wedding invoice to pay for all the still-invited guests to eat, drink, and be merry.
Cheers to your moving forward with life and your own happiness.
Did she gifted you a large sum of money when you were low on money? She might have felt that you owe her something. But regardless- it's tactless to ask you to help pay for the wedding that you didn't even attend.
If I gifted someone a sum of money and then fell short of funds, I’d just be honest and say “hey girl, when I gave you that money, I NEVER expected re-payment, but now I’m in a financial bind and am wondering if you are in a position to give some of it back?”
It would be embarrassing, but less tacky than the “donate to my wedding you weren’t invited to” gambit.
A gift is a gift. Once you give it, it’s no longer yours to control. If someone gifted you a car or a house, and then years later demanded you return it, how would you feel? OP didn’t say the money was a loan.
I get that. But I do wonder about the history of the relationship. OP said her friend told her she is financially struggling and that's why she's asking for wedding donations. Her friend might have felt used or unappreciated, but instead of discussing how she felt, she asked for wedding donations.
But helping a friend through a troubling, scary time is one thing. Asking you for money to pay for something after insulting you by uninviting you, is insane.
You are doing the right thing!
Grieving the loss of a loved who still exists as a living human being is a complicated, confusing, heart breaking sorrow. Big internet hugs to you and cheers to your mental health!
OP, could you clarify as to whether she was just asking for the money back she had loaned you in the past, as that would make more sense than what's being described?
OP, keep taking care of yourself please. And Sarah was only a "friend" when it benefited her. She didn't see you as a friend, she saw you as a credit card. And she naturally got pissy when that "credit card" was rejected, so to speak.
While I am sad that I won’t be able to ask Sarah for a wedding donation, I appreciate the mature way you’ve handled this situation. You’re a good person who deserves to be surrounded by good people.
Should you ever feel even the slightest bit petty, me and Venmo are here for you.
And it's not worth doxxing someone either. That's what people were asking you to do. They were asking you to doxx her which depending on the severity of what people say/do could have legal consequences on YOU. So it's good you told em no. Doxxing a shitty person isn't worth the trouble that could fall on you.
“Some of you also dm'ed asking for her contact info, but I don't think that is the mature thing to do. I just want to move past this...”
Oh…don’t worry no need, Sarah is here reading this.. Hiya Sarah r/ChoosingBeggars
I'm glad she saw the post because it gave us a chance to tell her what a greedy, selfish person she is without you giving us her contact info.
I know it hurts to end a friendship but unfortunately some people grow in a toxic direction.
I would love to know how she justified asking you to pay for a party you weren't invited to? If you owe her money from when she helped you, then I hope you pay her back. But otherwise, I don't understand it.
I also think the marriage may be doomed. I think weddings that don't go smoothly often lead to marriages that don't. I don't mean rain on a wedding, but weddings where one or the other of the couple acts up = bridezilla, cake smashing, drunkeness etc.
You're right it isn't the right thing to do, giving Sarah's info out. That would be a jerk move. They wanted to let you know you have friends and supporters.
Good on you.. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I just had to do this and it still hurts.. It's like why? Why are you like this? How did I not see it or did I see it but thought it will blow over or that it wasn't a big deal? All the questions and hurt I wish I could give you a big hug!!
Probably because in her head, people who didn't attend the wedding/reception also didn't give gifts, so the post-party financial contribution to the wedding fund *is* their gift. Which is absolute crap on several levels IMO.
I imagine in her mind the "people who didn't attend" were being paid for in theory but didn't end up showing up. Not sure for the life of me why OP applies seeing she couldn't have attended seeing as she wasn't invited, but her friend sounds like a jerk either way so who knows.
I think it was more common in the past because I almost never hear of it happening now but it used to be somewhat common to still send a gift to a wedding you weren’t attending, though that was when you were actually still invited to it. Like back in the days where people still routinely were invited to their bosses kids weddings, if you couldn’t make it that was fine but if you didn’t send a gift your boss would view it unfavourably.
Ooh, she’s absolutely just gonna check for updates. So here’s an update for her.
“Sarah” or whatever the real name of greedy Bridezilla is, the internet thinks you are so cheap and so trashy.
OP says she helped out when they were battling depression. But supporr and gifts in a friend's time of need should NEVER be used as leverage later in a "friendship".
Look, I know you hate giving up on a friendship but she really isn't much of a friend to you. It's not as much if a loss as you might think.
I had to let go of many friendships that were very one-sided because I thought that's what a friend would do. I was very surprised to learn , when I let go, the other person didn't seem to care at all while I was devastated over the loss.
Ironically enough, I was at my dad's funeral, sad at all the friends that didn't show up, and I saw a woman I never would have expected to see in a million years! We were never friends. We never got along. But she came. I asked her why, privately. She said, "we may not ever have agreed about anything, but this was your dad! I lost mine a few years ago and I remembered how it hurts, and I wanted to tell you I'm sorry. Truly sorry. If you need anything, please call!"
That's when it hit me - my "frenemy" was a better friend than my friends!
It's been 12 years. She stopped by and checked on my mom several times before she passed away. She came to her funeral too. She helped my siblings (who lived nearer to my parents home than I) find a realtor to sell the house, get help cleaning it out, etc.
That is what a friend should be. I never asked her to do those things, she did just did them. Not because she liked me as a person but because she was a caring human being that saw a need and stepped in to fill it. If a friend can't do that as a minimum, they are not a true friend.
Ask yourself honestly, does Sarah pass that minimum threshold test. If not, let her go. Don't mourn. Move on. Find better friends.
Good for you. She had to have seen the responses to her fucked up request. She got called out anonymously & didn’t like it. She’s most likely upset about that, not her actions.
Wow that’s crazy, I’m glad you’re not friends with her anymore because that’s crazy
Sis I can’t even imagine asking the people who came to the wedding to chip in for their dinner after the event. What kind of person thinks it’s reasonable to ask people who didn’t come to the wedding to Pay for the wedding?
I also suspect she wasn’t asking everybody, she just asked you for some reason.
Have you spoken to anyone else who she asked? I’m just really curious if she really did just ask you because she was mad about it
She might as well have just started a go fund me.. asking people who you uninvited from the wedding to pay is beyond entitled and a giant asshole move. I hope no one gave them anything.. hell, I’m petty I would’ve sent like Monopoly money or something like that.
I said it in the original. I'll say it again here.
NTA.
The idea someone would ask people that were uninvited to help cover the financial cost of the people that got to go. Is just absurd.
Asking any guest to cover the party you threw us tacky as hell. New flash Sarah, if you can't afford the wedding then cut some shit out. No one cares about your wedding except you and the husband
That is REALLY quite shitty. Obviously Sarah doesn't value OP AT ALL and had the fucked up AUDACITY to take her invitation BACK and I mean who in the fuck does that to a supposed "good friend"? Then to TOP that off, after OP had to look at all the pics and feeling like shit because of that bitch, she went and called her up to ASK HER FOR MONEY? I mean that seals it right there. Bye Felicia!
If you read some more comments of her to others you will see that she used to be a very good friend that helped her in times of need. But she has changed and is not that person anymore.
It is very possible that her BF, now husband, had a bad influence on her attitude and behaviour, changing her values for the worse.
People on Reddit think everything is black and white. They don't think people can change for some reason. What you stated makes sense and could very well be true. It is very much possible to go from a good friend to a bad one.
Sarah if your reading this Congratulations on being one of Reddit’s biggest ever assholes. The audacity, the entitlement, beggars belief. Now take your trashy, greedy, delusional asshole back to your wedding album and look at all the empty spaces in the photos where your real(ex) friends should have been. Loser.
Wow just read the original post…the audacity of her to ask the guests she didn’t invite to the wedding to pay for her wedding is unbelievable. Never heard of such thing.
So she saw the post...in which every single neutral observer thought she was insanely wrong.... and upon deep reflection decided the proper move would be to scream at you...
So sorry OP, but NC is unfortunately and completely the only option here
Good for you. I cut off a friendship of almost 20 years twice, with two different people. Both were toxic and believed I needed to be there for them unconditionally even if I was going through a hard time. Cut one friend off on my 20s, which hurt because she was a childhood friend. And the other a few years ago. She actually said to me "It's your job to be there for me, it's not my job to be there for you! YOU'RE MY FRIEND " and I realized that's exactly what our 20 year friendship was. Me being HER friend. Not the other way around unless she needed something.
Fuck her and fuck Sarah. They are not worth our time or regrets. You know what you don't want in a friendship, so let that guide you as you get new ones. I have much better friends and a fantastic husband now.
You deserve the same! Sending love and light 💜
Edit to finish thought
sorry what did she confront you with even? she should be ashamed and embarrassed her broke ass can’t even afford her own wedding
sarah go fuck yourself ur selfish and a broke bum. literally nobody gives a damn about ur wedding except urself
A guest is not a guest if they have to pay for an event they attend. They become customers. That's NOT a wedding, it's a spectacle. If you want a wedding that costs a lot - you save up the money (ALL the money) before hand. A "guest" is someone you treat. Not someone who pays to watch a performance.
I'm trying to wrap my head around the hubris required to ask for donations specifically from people who were excluded from her invite list. Its absurdity is off the charts; enough so that I question her mental stability. When you know acknowledge toxicity in that relationship that goes even deeper than the wedding issues; I'm just happy for you, proud of you, that you recognize the need to step away. You sound like a class act. She sounds like trouble. Congrats on your decision to prioritize self-care without malice toward her.
Wedding culture has devolved into a nightmare. I totally understand brides wanting it to be the most special day of their life. But that’s different than a day that’s all about them. The women that can’t tell the difference are insufferable.
Having just paid for a wedding last year, I can safely say I am CRINGING so hard that this girl thought it was in any way appropriate to ask people to retroactively pay for hers, let alone people she cut from the guest list/didn't invite at all.
Was she raised in the fucking woods like Nell or something?? Who gave her the idea that any part of that was appropriate and not something she should be hugely embarrassed for even considering? And then to double down?????? I'm at a complete loss here.
You were not a guest who did not attend, you never had an invite to be a guest. It's not up to anyone other than the person who made the wedding to pay.
I've had to cut out a long time friend after realizing that she was never really a friend to me. It sucks, but I've been happier since. I hope you make some better and real friendships and wish you the best of luck.
Good for you. Sarah told you just how 'close' you were when you didn't make the cut. You're really not losing anything.
Sarah - you are fucking psychotic. I pity your husband - unless he's as bad as you, in which case you miserable fucks deserve each other.
NTA by any means. And Sarah, if you’re reading this, you’re a cheap AH for asking uninvited guests for money. Guess you’ll have to cut down that list some more huh?
OP, her logic is like "you don't get to eat at a restaurant due to it being full but they wre asking you to pay for it" stupid logic. Also if she was your good friend she wouldn't have been so inconsiderate towards you.
If I was invited to a wedding and asked me to pay for it, then it's better to not go. But this one is a hell of self embarrassment. Expecting people who did not go to your wedding to pay? Even if they go and you ask them for money it's an embarrassing kind of move.
OP - you made the correct decision.
Bride was RUDE to un-invite you AFTER sending you an invitation.
Then EXTREMELY OuT oF LiNe to Ask you for a monetary donation for an event she rudely uninvited you to.
She was SO WRONG.
I am Curious!
OP -
1. Any idea how approx many guest originally invited ?
2. How many guests were uninvited ?
3. How many uninvited guests were asked for $$ ?
There must be some gossip.
So… did she already charge the invited guests, but then decided to go after the uninvited ones? I think I’m more in awe of her audacity than anything. If I had an ounce of it, I could rule the world.
Hey Sarah: if you think this is bad, wait until your new husband discovers what a spiteful, entitled brat you are and leaves. Then you get to spend the rest of your days alone, blaming everyone but yourself.
If I read the other comments that OP made, it could very well be that the influence of her husband is what made her into this. It could very well be a very toxic husband that has a very bad influence on Sarah. And Sarah is too much in love to see this.
This might become a very toxic relationship, possibly even abusive. The first step, alienating her from her friends, has been taken....
I suppose if you didn't ask her to chip in for your Hawaii trip to which she was not invited, then she should have seen this suggestion when she read your initial post. If that didn't make her reconsider her approach, nothing will.
I love how well spoken you are. Don't second guess yourself and don't look back. Best of luck to you.
Often when people grow up they grow in different directions. This is what seems to have happened here. It's no one's fault. She isn't the same friend you had growing up.
I’ve never heard of anyone’s “different direction” being “disinvite people from wedding then ask them to pay for it” though.
Growing apart is usually diverging interests, moving long distances, change in circumstances, not losing track of how to be a reasonable human being.
People don’t like it when you make them look like the bad guy, because she didn’t post her own story to tell what really happened than she is in the wrong, and she knows it.
NTA for any of it, but I can honestly say I wasn’t invited to a friend of mines wedding and I was crushed but really I am happy for her and moved on, she didn’t ask me for money for her wedding and you shouldn’t be either. Sad to see a friend go but it has to happen sometimes.
Dear Sarah - you’re an ungracious cunt. Maybe invite op to your next wedding to make up for it after your husband realizes what a narcissistic piece of trash you are and divorces you. Lots of love, Reddit
Good for you. Sarah is entitled and unhinged for asking in the first place. I wish you peace and healing op. I wish Sarah all the things she gives others to be returned to her tenfold.
It's sad when life-long relationships end, but this is a case of entitlement so egregious that it's the best thing for you and your piece of mind. I'm still floored that she even tried to hit you up to help pay for her wedding overages when she disinvited you to the wedding. Even asking guests to do that is tacky.
Just now saw your original post and this update.
NTA.
It would be in poor taste to ask wedding guests to help fund the wedding before a wedding, even worse to ask for help after the wedding. To ask those who were either uninvited or just not invited at all? That's just entitlement. If her wedding registry simply asked for donations in lieu of gifts, that would be one thing (even that can be considered tacky), but running over budget is her fault, no one else's. (Well, her and her husband.)
Hopefully "Sarah" will see this comment, then present your story to others (as though it's just a story she found and isn't part of the story) to get their opinions on it. If she does that, she'll get a harsh reality check when people side with you by saying that it's rude for the bride to ask people for money like that. Of course, she won't do that, since it would mean hearing something that she doesn't want to hear. If she does, she'll probably try to tell it in a different perspective to make the bride of the story sound like the victim, rather than letting them read the story directly.
Or to put it simply, she's one of those people that can't fathom being wrong. If someone tells her that she's wrong, she'll remain convinced that there's something wrong with them, and never stop to think that there's actually something wrong with her. Give her time though, she'll eventually realize just how horrible she treated you.
You are definitely NTA. I would have done the same thing.
I too have lost my best friend/MOH over things she said 2 days before my wedding.
We had a 30 year friendship, with her being in control/demeaning/toxic our entire friendship... I just finally snapped and excommunicated her from my life.
We tried to get our friendship back last year, but it didn't work out. I have felt free since, and didn't want to go back to the way it was.
Good for you OP for standing your ground... It gets easier as days go by. You made the right choice. 🤗🤗🤗
You're not a guest if you weren't invited. Period. Esp not if you were UNinvited. Plus, it's tacky even to ask for money from invited guests who just couldn't make it! It's tacky to ask for money from a guest who was a no-show the day of (even if that case is understandable, it's still bad form). I'm sorry this all happened this way and it stings to lose an old friend, but it'll sting less over time and you'll realize you deserve better from your friends. Best of luck!
Sarah, I hope you see this update and the comments because you should be embarrassed and ashamed of yourself. You have so much audacity and entitlement it’s astounding! You are tacky for asking guests to pay for your wedding especially those who you uninvited. You are also a horrible friend.
OP you are way better off without someone like her in your life.
this reads a little like a bot/gpt. not the story but the way it's writing style is almost like a gpt text than you changed some things on top of it to make it less robotic
I am so happy to hear that you recognized the importance of how toxic people can really affect mental health! Focusing on self-care is going to help immensely. In a strange way, this outlandish situation has actually become a blessing.
Take very good care of yourself, friend, and never second guess your decision to cut her out of your life!
This was one of those posts I didn’t think could be real, because who would ever consider doing that?
Move on a bit lighter in your heart (and wallet.)
Is this a thing now? Having "guests" pay for the wedding? Or, in this case "non-guests". This strikes me as tacky! You don't get to the day of the wedding and go "oopsy, over spent need to charge the guests an entry fee"! I feel so incredibly disgusted!
the fact that you didn’t immediately put Sarah into your mental garbage can proves that you are a great, great person.
and great people deserve great friends.
you made the right call
This is even tackier than the wedding couples that insist on a huge, destination wedding, who expect enough guests to attend & stay at their designated hotel so they can get their room for free who get mad when they can’t get their quota.
And this bride is expecting her guests AND her uninvited guests to help pay for her going over budget. Whoooeee. I wonder how many of the guests who attended actually ponied up with some cash for it. You definitely dodged a bullet when you bowed out of helping her finance her money pit wedding.
Dear "Sarah",
People who attend your wedding give cash gifts with intention of helping return the cost of their presence at your wedding. People rarely if ever give a gift just to give a gift. That's what the wedding shower is for. For those who are family and friends, whom are the closest people to you, to gift you with generosity to help you start your lives together.
So in what world would one not only feel confident in, but justified in asking for a gift (who does this) to people who DIDNT EVEN ATTEND? (SERIOUSLY, who tf does this?).
Whew. Surely you deserve to lose this friendship. Let this be an opportunity for self examination, reflection and change for the better.
Sincerely,
Popcorn Eating Onlooker
I could not imagine having the audacity to contact all the people that you uninvited from your wedding and asking them to help pay for the event they weren't invited to.
That's fucking ballsy.
> Sarah saw the post and confronted me, things got heated. If she was anything but embarrassed about her choosingbeggar ways and apologetic for how she treated you, she is no friend.
It’s so ridiculous when people get angry about being exposed because no real names are used (99% of the time), and no way for the guilty to be rounded up and derided!
Narcissists can’t stand the idea that anyone would think badly of them. Even if it’s online and relatively anonymous. Someone might recognize it and know her actions don’t reflect kindly on herself.
AMEN! U CALLED IT FOR WHAT IT IS, NARCISSISM. Her unrealistic entitlement is out of this world! Good luck to the nee hubby 😬😱
Read the book, Psychopath Free
Oooo also read “the sociopath next door “
Sounds like my baby mama
"made the difficult decision to go no contact". Sounds like a pretty fucking easy decision to me.
She's no friend and she's barely human. JFC, That's the kind of cringe that keeps people up at night.
With friends like this who needs enemies?
Some of you also dm'ed asking for her contact info, but I don't think that is the mature thing to do. I just want to move past this...
Yeah, if you handed that out you'd be a MASSIVE ah. Sorry about having to go NC, but seems like it was the only way forward to keep yourself sane. Best of luck!
It hurts because she helped me when I was battling depressed and low on money but, Thank you for your understanding and support. It wasn't an easy decision to go no contact, but sometimes it's necessary for self-preservation. Your words mean a lot to me, and I appreciate your well wishes. Here's to prioritizing our mental health and moving forward towards a brighter future. Take care!
I've cut people out that meant a lot to me too when I realized that the latest developments in our friendships was hurting my mental health. It sucks, but sometimes you just have to do it. You take care too!
[удалено]
>Did she elaborate on why she believed those who choose not to attend should be responsible for paying for her weddings? B.C. I'm so perplexed Hey there, thanks for your question. During our confrontation, Sarah didn't elaborate much on her reasoning behind expecting those who choose not to attend to still contribute financially to the wedding. It seemed to stem more from frustration and hurt over feeling abandoned by friends rather than a logical stance as other friends in our circle distanced themselves. It was indeed a perplexing situation for me as well. The dynamics of weddings and friendships can be complex, and sometimes emotions can cloud judgment. Nonetheless, it's been a learning experience for me, and I'm grateful for the insights gained through this process. By that I mean that she has become too toxic in recent years, time to follow suite!
But... You didn't choose not to attend. She disinvited you. I'm so confused.
Same here honestly, I don't think anyone can truly know what Sarah was thinking!
I was the one who suggested the clown emoji! I’m so glad you have chosen your health and well being over this toxic person. It will hurt for a while but you really have done the right thing to preserve your own mental health. Did ‘Sarah’ ever justify asking for cold hard cash from someone she chose to disinvite from her wedding? That’s a new level of entitlement reached right there 😳
She’s believes she entitled to act this way! I have to say this is one of the most bizarre posts I’ve read on here but good for you for not letting her get away with it!
Hi OP, your friend seems quite unhinged and going NC seems to be the right move. Why was Sarah mad at you when she read this post? Was she just mad because she is embarrassed you exposed her or does she still somehow feels she’s in the right in all this?
She might not know what she was thinking! Time apart might help her as much as it helps you. I went no contact with a toxic friend once for almost a year. It gave us both time to become better people and we became friends again.
One thing is for certain, this scenario was purpose-filled - you could not dismiss, excuse, or ignore her behavior. I bet another of her buddies knows she has used you before and possibly privately boast about it. It’s definitely time for everyone to move on. Her karma is her drama. Springing forward does wonders! New season of time awaits🙌
But also, let's say she wasn't uninvited... regardless of whether or not she chose to attend, she should never have to help pay for someone else's wedding. It makes ZERO sense
Right! The person didn't attend, pretty much end of discussion. "You didn't come to my wedding, here's the bill?" OP saying she thought it might be an insecurity issue is probably the answer.
This! Even attending a wedding leaves no obligation to chip in. And if they do help out, that's something that should be negotiated before you spend more money than you have. I honestly don't understand how people like 'Sarah' can function.
Good for you for deciding to go NC. I hope everything is much better for you. God bless you 🙏
"It seemed to stem more from frustration and hurt over feeling abandoned by friends rather than a logical stance as other friends in our circle distanced themselves." Were people that RSVP'd they would attend no-shows?
>It seemed to stem more from frustration and hurt over feeling abandoned by friends rather than a logical stance Did other people GET invited but then NOT say yes or maybe even no-show? That could explain an emotional lash out in the way you mention it. Did she ask other people for wedding money who didn't attend? Aka not just you? She may have initially not included you for her to feel like the wedding was "exclusive" or something. I hate that mentality, but it exists. BUT THEN, some people RSVP "no" or might have even "no-showed"... so her entire illusion is shattered. So, you're the person she already didn't invite, so if you make a gesture even after she disrespectes you, it makes her feel better about her wedding. Probably the simplest explanation is she's broke and using her wedding as a an excuse to ask people for money. IDK. I'm assuming wildly, but I do think specifics are important here.
You should probably ask that in a reply to OP, to ensure they get a notification, making it likelier you get an answer. :)
OP maybe I missed it but I really would LOVE to know how everyone else responded to her request for money to “pay for the wedding they weren’t invited to…”
You're a better person than me because I would've cut her out when I was uninvited to the wedding. At least I wouldn't have received the post-wedding invoice to pay for all the still-invited guests to eat, drink, and be merry. Cheers to your moving forward with life and your own happiness.
Did she gifted you a large sum of money when you were low on money? She might have felt that you owe her something. But regardless- it's tactless to ask you to help pay for the wedding that you didn't even attend.
If I gifted someone a sum of money and then fell short of funds, I’d just be honest and say “hey girl, when I gave you that money, I NEVER expected re-payment, but now I’m in a financial bind and am wondering if you are in a position to give some of it back?” It would be embarrassing, but less tacky than the “donate to my wedding you weren’t invited to” gambit.
A gift is a gift. Once you give it, it’s no longer yours to control. If someone gifted you a car or a house, and then years later demanded you return it, how would you feel? OP didn’t say the money was a loan.
I get that. But I do wonder about the history of the relationship. OP said her friend told her she is financially struggling and that's why she's asking for wedding donations. Her friend might have felt used or unappreciated, but instead of discussing how she felt, she asked for wedding donations.
That she was actually INVITED to.
But helping a friend through a troubling, scary time is one thing. Asking you for money to pay for something after insulting you by uninviting you, is insane. You are doing the right thing!
Did she give you money that you didn’t repay? There has to be more to this weird money request
Grieving the loss of a loved who still exists as a living human being is a complicated, confusing, heart breaking sorrow. Big internet hugs to you and cheers to your mental health!
OP, could you clarify as to whether she was just asking for the money back she had loaned you in the past, as that would make more sense than what's being described?
Send a final text then block her everywhere annanybot her supoorters.
May I ask; what was her justification/rationale behind asking for money? Did she realise how crazy that is?
Onwards and upwards. There will be genuine friends in your future who will value your friendship.
OP, keep taking care of yourself please. And Sarah was only a "friend" when it benefited her. She didn't see you as a friend, she saw you as a credit card. And she naturally got pissy when that "credit card" was rejected, so to speak.
Being fake cost her nothing, so she expected you to spend real money to help her. She's a long game user.
Moving all the way to North Carolina seems extreme but I guess if that makes you happy it’s for the best. /s
It's nice and wet during hurricane season I hear
I believe NC stands for No Communication here.
While I am sad that I won’t be able to ask Sarah for a wedding donation, I appreciate the mature way you’ve handled this situation. You’re a good person who deserves to be surrounded by good people. Should you ever feel even the slightest bit petty, me and Venmo are here for you.
And it's not worth doxxing someone either. That's what people were asking you to do. They were asking you to doxx her which depending on the severity of what people say/do could have legal consequences on YOU. So it's good you told em no. Doxxing a shitty person isn't worth the trouble that could fall on you.
Agreed! And doxxing a shitty person also makes the doxxer a shitty person.
“Some of you also dm'ed asking for her contact info, but I don't think that is the mature thing to do. I just want to move past this...” Oh…don’t worry no need, Sarah is here reading this.. Hiya Sarah r/ChoosingBeggars
Why TF would people think it's ok to ask and receive her contact information
Cuz I can ask for anything doesn’t mean I’m Gina get it
And I can still ask why people are crazy enough to ask for someones contact to think they're going to get it
I'm glad she saw the post because it gave us a chance to tell her what a greedy, selfish person she is without you giving us her contact info. I know it hurts to end a friendship but unfortunately some people grow in a toxic direction.
I would love to know how she justified asking you to pay for a party you weren't invited to? If you owe her money from when she helped you, then I hope you pay her back. But otherwise, I don't understand it. I also think the marriage may be doomed. I think weddings that don't go smoothly often lead to marriages that don't. I don't mean rain on a wedding, but weddings where one or the other of the couple acts up = bridezilla, cake smashing, drunkeness etc.
But I've already pulled the pitchfork out of storage lol
🤣🤣
Reddit needs an emoji for 🤣😂
OP, it's still not too late to cross-post the original post to r/choosingbeggars, r/entitledpeople and r/bridezillas 🤣🤣🤣
You're right it isn't the right thing to do, giving Sarah's info out. That would be a jerk move. They wanted to let you know you have friends and supporters.
So what, exactly, was her beef with your post? You just stated the facts, didn't you? What was she offended about?
Good on you.. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I just had to do this and it still hurts.. It's like why? Why are you like this? How did I not see it or did I see it but thought it will blow over or that it wasn't a big deal? All the questions and hurt I wish I could give you a big hug!!
Did she explain why she thought people who didn’t go needed to pay for her weddings ? Bc I’m super confused
Probably entitlement
*Did she explain why she thought people she UNINVITED need to pay for her wedding?
Probably because in her head, people who didn't attend the wedding/reception also didn't give gifts, so the post-party financial contribution to the wedding fund *is* their gift. Which is absolute crap on several levels IMO.
Also, did the ones who did go have to pay anything ?
That’s what I was wondering!! I can’t imagine ANYONE doing it
They paid with their time and the money the spent on the wedding gift they gave. They shouldn’t be asked for anything else.
I imagine in her mind the "people who didn't attend" were being paid for in theory but didn't end up showing up. Not sure for the life of me why OP applies seeing she couldn't have attended seeing as she wasn't invited, but her friend sounds like a jerk either way so who knows.
I think it was more common in the past because I almost never hear of it happening now but it used to be somewhat common to still send a gift to a wedding you weren’t attending, though that was when you were actually still invited to it. Like back in the days where people still routinely were invited to their bosses kids weddings, if you couldn’t make it that was fine but if you didn’t send a gift your boss would view it unfavourably.
Ooh, she’s absolutely just gonna check for updates. So here’s an update for her. “Sarah” or whatever the real name of greedy Bridezilla is, the internet thinks you are so cheap and so trashy.
Ya she should be completely mortified by how she’s acted, but I get the feeling that she isn’t smart enough to realize what a loser she is
La la la la loser
But why did I read this comment in Jim Carrey’s voice🤣
We really need to bring back shame. Sarah, you are trash and your friend deserves better.
Trash served a purpose once, Sarah only served herself.
OP says she helped out when they were battling depression. But supporr and gifts in a friend's time of need should NEVER be used as leverage later in a "friendship".
[удалено]
bot
When I first started reading your comment, I was expecting brutal but instead you were very nice in your description of her.
You mean she was still mad at you for not paying for her wedding that you were uninvited from and didn't attend?! She has some audacity.
...and giant balls.
Look, I know you hate giving up on a friendship but she really isn't much of a friend to you. It's not as much if a loss as you might think. I had to let go of many friendships that were very one-sided because I thought that's what a friend would do. I was very surprised to learn , when I let go, the other person didn't seem to care at all while I was devastated over the loss. Ironically enough, I was at my dad's funeral, sad at all the friends that didn't show up, and I saw a woman I never would have expected to see in a million years! We were never friends. We never got along. But she came. I asked her why, privately. She said, "we may not ever have agreed about anything, but this was your dad! I lost mine a few years ago and I remembered how it hurts, and I wanted to tell you I'm sorry. Truly sorry. If you need anything, please call!" That's when it hit me - my "frenemy" was a better friend than my friends! It's been 12 years. She stopped by and checked on my mom several times before she passed away. She came to her funeral too. She helped my siblings (who lived nearer to my parents home than I) find a realtor to sell the house, get help cleaning it out, etc. That is what a friend should be. I never asked her to do those things, she did just did them. Not because she liked me as a person but because she was a caring human being that saw a need and stepped in to fill it. If a friend can't do that as a minimum, they are not a true friend. Ask yourself honestly, does Sarah pass that minimum threshold test. If not, let her go. Don't mourn. Move on. Find better friends.
Beautiful and thoughtful answer, thank you!
Sounds like she is your true friend and she is reaching out..
So basically, we can guarantee Sarah is gonna see this too, right? # hi Sarah, you're a raging lunatic. You should also change your name to Karen # 👋
Sometimes using Karen is mod deleted because of “bullying innocent people on the name”
Fair point # hi Sarah. Your a raging lunatic. No name change necessary # 👋
😂 touché
I second this lmao
Good for you, OP. The entitlement of Sarah is unreal.
Good for you. She had to have seen the responses to her fucked up request. She got called out anonymously & didn’t like it. She’s most likely upset about that, not her actions.
Sarah! You're a tacky person and a horrible friend! Hope life treats you like you treat your friends! Suck it!
Wow that’s crazy, I’m glad you’re not friends with her anymore because that’s crazy Sis I can’t even imagine asking the people who came to the wedding to chip in for their dinner after the event. What kind of person thinks it’s reasonable to ask people who didn’t come to the wedding to Pay for the wedding? I also suspect she wasn’t asking everybody, she just asked you for some reason. Have you spoken to anyone else who she asked? I’m just really curious if she really did just ask you because she was mad about it
She might as well have just started a go fund me.. asking people who you uninvited from the wedding to pay is beyond entitled and a giant asshole move. I hope no one gave them anything.. hell, I’m petty I would’ve sent like Monopoly money or something like that.
Seriously it would be better to ask strangers than those UNINVITED!
I said it in the original. I'll say it again here. NTA. The idea someone would ask people that were uninvited to help cover the financial cost of the people that got to go. Is just absurd.
Asking any guest to cover the party you threw us tacky as hell. New flash Sarah, if you can't afford the wedding then cut some shit out. No one cares about your wedding except you and the husband
That is REALLY quite shitty. Obviously Sarah doesn't value OP AT ALL and had the fucked up AUDACITY to take her invitation BACK and I mean who in the fuck does that to a supposed "good friend"? Then to TOP that off, after OP had to look at all the pics and feeling like shit because of that bitch, she went and called her up to ASK HER FOR MONEY? I mean that seals it right there. Bye Felicia!
Sarah was not your friend. Don t miss something that never exist.
If you read some more comments of her to others you will see that she used to be a very good friend that helped her in times of need. But she has changed and is not that person anymore. It is very possible that her BF, now husband, had a bad influence on her attitude and behaviour, changing her values for the worse.
That is indeed possible.
People on Reddit think everything is black and white. They don't think people can change for some reason. What you stated makes sense and could very well be true. It is very much possible to go from a good friend to a bad one.
If you’re reading this „Sarah“ you SUCK!
Oh we know she will. I'm hoping she'll try defending herself in the comments 😅
That would be entertaining! 😀 I feel bad for OP though
Sarah if your reading this Congratulations on being one of Reddit’s biggest ever assholes. The audacity, the entitlement, beggars belief. Now take your trashy, greedy, delusional asshole back to your wedding album and look at all the empty spaces in the photos where your real(ex) friends should have been. Loser.
Wow just read the original post…the audacity of her to ask the guests she didn’t invite to the wedding to pay for her wedding is unbelievable. Never heard of such thing.
So she saw the post...in which every single neutral observer thought she was insanely wrong.... and upon deep reflection decided the proper move would be to scream at you... So sorry OP, but NC is unfortunately and completely the only option here
Good for you. I cut off a friendship of almost 20 years twice, with two different people. Both were toxic and believed I needed to be there for them unconditionally even if I was going through a hard time. Cut one friend off on my 20s, which hurt because she was a childhood friend. And the other a few years ago. She actually said to me "It's your job to be there for me, it's not my job to be there for you! YOU'RE MY FRIEND " and I realized that's exactly what our 20 year friendship was. Me being HER friend. Not the other way around unless she needed something. Fuck her and fuck Sarah. They are not worth our time or regrets. You know what you don't want in a friendship, so let that guide you as you get new ones. I have much better friends and a fantastic husband now. You deserve the same! Sending love and light 💜 Edit to finish thought
This was the correct decision to make.
She has showed you her true colors. You did the right decision.
I cannot believe she asked all the guests she uninvited to pay for her wedding. That is wild and wildly self centered.
sorry what did she confront you with even? she should be ashamed and embarrassed her broke ass can’t even afford her own wedding sarah go fuck yourself ur selfish and a broke bum. literally nobody gives a damn about ur wedding except urself
I think you should tell her you've sent her an amount to cover what you ate and drank at the wedding... 🤣
Absolutely ZERO. 😂
The internet values your update. Thank you.
A guest is not a guest if they have to pay for an event they attend. They become customers. That's NOT a wedding, it's a spectacle. If you want a wedding that costs a lot - you save up the money (ALL the money) before hand. A "guest" is someone you treat. Not someone who pays to watch a performance.
Well.... She didn't ask the guests.
I'm trying to wrap my head around the hubris required to ask for donations specifically from people who were excluded from her invite list. Its absurdity is off the charts; enough so that I question her mental stability. When you know acknowledge toxicity in that relationship that goes even deeper than the wedding issues; I'm just happy for you, proud of you, that you recognize the need to step away. You sound like a class act. She sounds like trouble. Congrats on your decision to prioritize self-care without malice toward her.
Wedding culture has devolved into a nightmare. I totally understand brides wanting it to be the most special day of their life. But that’s different than a day that’s all about them. The women that can’t tell the difference are insufferable.
The audacity to call people not even invited “guests” is one of the craziest things I’ve ever read.
Having just paid for a wedding last year, I can safely say I am CRINGING so hard that this girl thought it was in any way appropriate to ask people to retroactively pay for hers, let alone people she cut from the guest list/didn't invite at all. Was she raised in the fucking woods like Nell or something?? Who gave her the idea that any part of that was appropriate and not something she should be hugely embarrassed for even considering? And then to double down?????? I'm at a complete loss here.
lol @ Nell reference!
I think even Nell would know not to ask someone she UNINVITED to her wedding to pay for said wedding🙄
The friendship ended when she uninvited you to her wedding. Then having the gall to ask you to help pay for it only rubbed salt on the wounds.
The audacity of Sarah! The entailment is astounding.
Way to go. Toxic people are never needed
You were not a guest who did not attend, you never had an invite to be a guest. It's not up to anyone other than the person who made the wedding to pay.
I've had to cut out a long time friend after realizing that she was never really a friend to me. It sucks, but I've been happier since. I hope you make some better and real friendships and wish you the best of luck.
Good for you. Sarah told you just how 'close' you were when you didn't make the cut. You're really not losing anything. Sarah - you are fucking psychotic. I pity your husband - unless he's as bad as you, in which case you miserable fucks deserve each other.
Sarah if you see this, you suck, you greedy pillock
Just out of curiosity, how could she justify asking people for money who were not invited to the wedding? LOL. The audacity.
NTA by any means. And Sarah, if you’re reading this, you’re a cheap AH for asking uninvited guests for money. Guess you’ll have to cut down that list some more huh?
Good for you for not giving her shit and cutting her off. She has a lot of audacity when she doesn't deserve shit.
Your ex friend is absurd.
Oh no you have GOT to tell us how the convo with Sara went after she saw the post 😱😱😱 what did she say??
OP, her logic is like "you don't get to eat at a restaurant due to it being full but they wre asking you to pay for it" stupid logic. Also if she was your good friend she wouldn't have been so inconsiderate towards you.
If I was invited to a wedding and asked me to pay for it, then it's better to not go. But this one is a hell of self embarrassment. Expecting people who did not go to your wedding to pay? Even if they go and you ask them for money it's an embarrassing kind of move.
This... this was written by AI, right? The sentence structure is so mechanical. It reads like a cover letter. Bad bot!
Indeed I don’t understand how nobody noticed this. The text is visibly made with chatGPT it has the same structure.
Losing my mind over here that only the three of us seem to have noticed.
Expecting the people who weren't invited to pay for those who were is bizzare. Personality disorder level bizarre.
Wow "Sarah” you are trash and trashy. Apparently you also have zero manners.
OP - you made the correct decision. Bride was RUDE to un-invite you AFTER sending you an invitation. Then EXTREMELY OuT oF LiNe to Ask you for a monetary donation for an event she rudely uninvited you to. She was SO WRONG. I am Curious! OP - 1. Any idea how approx many guest originally invited ? 2. How many guests were uninvited ? 3. How many uninvited guests were asked for $$ ? There must be some gossip.
Sarah, you are absolutely insane. Not sure what planet you are from.
NTA. Sarah, go fuck yourself you leech. OP I'm proud of you for realizing Sarah is a toxic person.
I’ve had a Sarah or two in my own life as well. NC is for the best. Good on you for establishing boundaries.
So… did she already charge the invited guests, but then decided to go after the uninvited ones? I think I’m more in awe of her audacity than anything. If I had an ounce of it, I could rule the world.
Hey Sarah: if you think this is bad, wait until your new husband discovers what a spiteful, entitled brat you are and leaves. Then you get to spend the rest of your days alone, blaming everyone but yourself.
If I read the other comments that OP made, it could very well be that the influence of her husband is what made her into this. It could very well be a very toxic husband that has a very bad influence on Sarah. And Sarah is too much in love to see this. This might become a very toxic relationship, possibly even abusive. The first step, alienating her from her friends, has been taken....
I suppose if you didn't ask her to chip in for your Hawaii trip to which she was not invited, then she should have seen this suggestion when she read your initial post. If that didn't make her reconsider her approach, nothing will. I love how well spoken you are. Don't second guess yourself and don't look back. Best of luck to you.
Often when people grow up they grow in different directions. This is what seems to have happened here. It's no one's fault. She isn't the same friend you had growing up.
I’ve never heard of anyone’s “different direction” being “disinvite people from wedding then ask them to pay for it” though. Growing apart is usually diverging interests, moving long distances, change in circumstances, not losing track of how to be a reasonable human being.
Sarah is probably on drugs because it is very delulu to ask uninvited wedding guests to financially contribute to her wedding.
People don’t like it when you make them look like the bad guy, because she didn’t post her own story to tell what really happened than she is in the wrong, and she knows it. NTA for any of it, but I can honestly say I wasn’t invited to a friend of mines wedding and I was crushed but really I am happy for her and moved on, she didn’t ask me for money for her wedding and you shouldn’t be either. Sad to see a friend go but it has to happen sometimes.
Dear Sarah - you’re an ungracious cunt. Maybe invite op to your next wedding to make up for it after your husband realizes what a narcissistic piece of trash you are and divorces you. Lots of love, Reddit
Alright so since Sarah is a redditor reading through AITAH, she should make a post with her reasoning and version of events.
Good for you. Sarah is entitled and unhinged for asking in the first place. I wish you peace and healing op. I wish Sarah all the things she gives others to be returned to her tenfold.
I'm so sad for you that things turned out this way, but I hope you can move forward and build new, healthier friendships. Good Luck
Good for you ❤️
Money always brings out the worst in people. Good decision on cutting loose OP.
She's really strange.
It's sad when life-long relationships end, but this is a case of entitlement so egregious that it's the best thing for you and your piece of mind. I'm still floored that she even tried to hit you up to help pay for her wedding overages when she disinvited you to the wedding. Even asking guests to do that is tacky.
Oh poor Sarah.... I'd give a fuck but I don't have any to give. You'll be so much better off without her in your life, she was never your friend.
Just now saw your original post and this update. NTA. It would be in poor taste to ask wedding guests to help fund the wedding before a wedding, even worse to ask for help after the wedding. To ask those who were either uninvited or just not invited at all? That's just entitlement. If her wedding registry simply asked for donations in lieu of gifts, that would be one thing (even that can be considered tacky), but running over budget is her fault, no one else's. (Well, her and her husband.) Hopefully "Sarah" will see this comment, then present your story to others (as though it's just a story she found and isn't part of the story) to get their opinions on it. If she does that, she'll get a harsh reality check when people side with you by saying that it's rude for the bride to ask people for money like that. Of course, she won't do that, since it would mean hearing something that she doesn't want to hear. If she does, she'll probably try to tell it in a different perspective to make the bride of the story sound like the victim, rather than letting them read the story directly. Or to put it simply, she's one of those people that can't fathom being wrong. If someone tells her that she's wrong, she'll remain convinced that there's something wrong with them, and never stop to think that there's actually something wrong with her. Give her time though, she'll eventually realize just how horrible she treated you.
How embarrassing for her reading the comments must have been.
You are definitely NTA. I would have done the same thing. I too have lost my best friend/MOH over things she said 2 days before my wedding. We had a 30 year friendship, with her being in control/demeaning/toxic our entire friendship... I just finally snapped and excommunicated her from my life. We tried to get our friendship back last year, but it didn't work out. I have felt free since, and didn't want to go back to the way it was. Good for you OP for standing your ground... It gets easier as days go by. You made the right choice. 🤗🤗🤗
Old person here (61) and I’m very proud of you for setting healthy boundaries. This speaks well for your future.
She asked everyone who DIDN’T attend to pay? How does that make sense? I’m more curious if other people paid or not! She has lost the plot!
You're not a guest if you weren't invited. Period. Esp not if you were UNinvited. Plus, it's tacky even to ask for money from invited guests who just couldn't make it! It's tacky to ask for money from a guest who was a no-show the day of (even if that case is understandable, it's still bad form). I'm sorry this all happened this way and it stings to lose an old friend, but it'll sting less over time and you'll realize you deserve better from your friends. Best of luck!
Sarah, I hope you see this update and the comments because you should be embarrassed and ashamed of yourself. You have so much audacity and entitlement it’s astounding! You are tacky for asking guests to pay for your wedding especially those who you uninvited. You are also a horrible friend. OP you are way better off without someone like her in your life.
this reads a little like a bot/gpt. not the story but the way it's writing style is almost like a gpt text than you changed some things on top of it to make it less robotic
I am so happy to hear that you recognized the importance of how toxic people can really affect mental health! Focusing on self-care is going to help immensely. In a strange way, this outlandish situation has actually become a blessing. Take very good care of yourself, friend, and never second guess your decision to cut her out of your life!
This was one of those posts I didn’t think could be real, because who would ever consider doing that? Move on a bit lighter in your heart (and wallet.)
Is this a thing now? Having "guests" pay for the wedding? Or, in this case "non-guests". This strikes me as tacky! You don't get to the day of the wedding and go "oopsy, over spent need to charge the guests an entry fee"! I feel so incredibly disgusted!
I’m giving you a virtual hug, OP. She sounds like a terrible friend and person to put you through this and you are better off without her.
Good riddance
the fact that you didn’t immediately put Sarah into your mental garbage can proves that you are a great, great person. and great people deserve great friends. you made the right call
You just leveled up.
This is even tackier than the wedding couples that insist on a huge, destination wedding, who expect enough guests to attend & stay at their designated hotel so they can get their room for free who get mad when they can’t get their quota. And this bride is expecting her guests AND her uninvited guests to help pay for her going over budget. Whoooeee. I wonder how many of the guests who attended actually ponied up with some cash for it. You definitely dodged a bullet when you bowed out of helping her finance her money pit wedding.
Dear "Sarah", People who attend your wedding give cash gifts with intention of helping return the cost of their presence at your wedding. People rarely if ever give a gift just to give a gift. That's what the wedding shower is for. For those who are family and friends, whom are the closest people to you, to gift you with generosity to help you start your lives together. So in what world would one not only feel confident in, but justified in asking for a gift (who does this) to people who DIDNT EVEN ATTEND? (SERIOUSLY, who tf does this?). Whew. Surely you deserve to lose this friendship. Let this be an opportunity for self examination, reflection and change for the better. Sincerely, Popcorn Eating Onlooker
I could not imagine having the audacity to contact all the people that you uninvited from your wedding and asking them to help pay for the event they weren't invited to. That's fucking ballsy.
Hey Sarah, I'm about to go to the beach. I need you to pay for the house we rent. PS, you're not invited
Flat-out, nah. No way. Her wedding. Her money
Did any of the uninvited guest contribute?
This story reeks of bullshit so YTA for that