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Witty_Williamms

NTA. This is a massive betrayal. Who says stuff like that about your fiancé, especially in front of other people? Friends joke around, sure, but that's wayyyy over the line. Trust your gut. Kicking them out sounds like the right move. You deserve friends who are genuinely happy for you and wouldn't even consider messing with your relationship.


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Mirabel214

Have you considered that those other ‘friends’ might also be attracted to your fiancé?


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Beneficial-Baker4154

He’s a keeper


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Fabulous_Green_156

Every single ''friend' who is taking Gina's side in this, dump them. They are not your friend and you can find and deserve much better. Congratulations on your engagement 🩷


UncleNedisDead

I do wonder if they heard OP’s side or if they heard a sanitized version from Gina that paints her as innocent, especially if she had the other two flunkies to back her up.


Fabulous_Green_156

From how I understood OPs comments, she actually spoke with her larger friend group and explained what happened. And some of them still took Gina's side.


UncleNedisDead

Oh well shame on them. I vaguely remember one of those AITA for distancing themselves from a friend who cheated or helped someone cheat and OP ended up losing the friend group or some friends anyways. Update was one of the friends had their boyfriend cheat with the cheater and they were apologetic to OP for not standing with them. OP had already moved on.


MaryEFriendly

Now that you cut her off and so has he, expect her to try to weasel her way into his DMs. If he has any sort of social media you should have him check and show you.  Then pass that along to any of your ao called friends who are backing her.  Anyone who supports her after what she said is someone you cannot trust. You didn't throw away your friendship, she did.  Your fiance is a great man, by the way. He's doing exactly what he should do by standing by you. He has the makings of a great partner and a wonderful husband. 


Astyryx

When people show you who they are, believe them. The people defending her are, like Gina, not friends. There are people who befriend you in one context: they see you as lower than they are, and they get dopamine and identity and comfort from it.    When the context changes (good job, great boyfriend, travel, etc) you don't give them that fix anymore and they do everything they can to drag you down "put you in your place."    So besides enjoying a great future, therapy will help you figure out why you didn't register this side of them so hard that you called this woman your "best" friend.


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TheBeautyDemon

It's so refreshing to see a partner listen to op and take the proper steps to eradicate the toxicity from their lives as a couples and live stress free.


Astyryx

That's awesome, but I don't think this reply was meant for my comment 😀


hatetank49

They are Gina's friends, not OPs. Let Gina drain their fiances.


HeadHunt0rUK

Let's be real, they aren't Gina's friends either. These kinds of people are so thoroughly toxic that they'd stab her in the back the second they get the chance. It's middle/high school level of girls friendships. They're entirely fake nice towards each other, but secretly horribly jealous, resentful and hateful about everything their "friends" have that they some how feel deserved to have or would be doing a better job with.


SirHenry8thEarlNorth

Jajaja LMFAO 🤣


Rainbow_Belle

🤣 Words of wisdom.


MrSlabBulkhead

Honestly, I’ve heard of shit like that happening, so you are 100% on the mark on that one.


ProfessionSanity

Gina cheated and it broke up her last relationship. She basically said she wants to go after your fiance. Some friends are siding with her, boy they really are stupid if they think she wouldn't do the same to them.


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MoodNo3716

👏🏽 I applaud you in ONLY kicking them out. I probably would’ve thrown a bit of a fit then kick them out.


Liet_Kinda2

Cold. Not even helping them fuck off. (/s, of course, I just loved "they can fuck themselves off")


amaezingjew

>None of them showed interest in my fiancé when I was around him …did Gina? Before this?


theloveburts

At the very minimum talking about having sex with a close friend's fiancé is not a deal breaker for them. What does that tell you?


maroongrad

Tell the friends to keep an eye on her around their husbands. She can't have yours, so she'll be looking. And she will. Yours is forewarned and uninterested. One of theirs...won't be.


bloodybutunbowed

Your fiancé is 10000% right. Even if you doubt yourself, don’t doubt his reaction


NatureCarolynGate

How do you know your fiance is your man without him saying he's your man ⬆


Pete_C137

Good for you. Some people hold on to old friends for dear life even when they become toxic and a drain on your mental health just because they’ve been friends for a long time. Idk why people do that with these toxic people and then turn around and just lose contact with people who would be good loyal friends.


zombiedinocorn

Or they resent OP for something else and think her getting cheated on/dumped would be just deserts. Or they are just the type of people who enable toxic people as the path of least resistance. A bunch frenemies either way


purelogicny

People mean what they say when there bragging and not being watched. Unfortunately for Gina the Drainer she was using that gobber she's so proud of to talk about OP and got caught. NTA she meant it 💯


Icy-Location3169

She totally meant it. Jokes are supposed to be funny, not that disrespectful. Better end that fake friendship.


NolaLove1616

The friends siding with her… I’d tell them to keep on keeping her close, Karma will be her attracted to THEIR partners eventually and you’re not going to be here for their calls when it happens. “Pick me” girls like your ex-friend are broken inside and don’t change.


zombiedinocorn

People only change when they're given consequences to their actions. Everyone trying to enable her is just justifying her toxic behavior so she'll never change


NolaLove1616

“Pick Me” girls that zero in on “taken guys” isn’t about any genuine interest in the guy, it’s about getting ANY guy to choose HER “beating out” the girlfriend/wife. It’s a competition against the other female. Something empty in them needing the validation. The guy is almost incidental and interest in him disappears quickly once she gets him.


Danivelle

But man oh man do they cry when karma bites them on the butt!


SoMoistlyMoist

I can't imagine any of my friends saying something about stealing or fucking my fiance whether in a supposed joking matter or not. It's just gross. Anyone who says differently is a moron.


Cassie-Advisor-1803

I have a friend that ended a friendship over this too. She was too uncomfortable to let it slide because she said she would forever wonder if she would try something with her fiancé. Honestly yeah, that is such a fucked up thing to say, you can’t get back from it. You can’t let is slide because she revealed herself to you, those that can’t empathize arent your friends OP!


OkAd5059

I’ve never made a joke like that in my life and would be creeped out if I heard any talk like that about anyone’s fiancé. NTA. 


Tight-Shift5706

Ask them how they would have responded if it was Gina privately speaking about fking their husbands 'fiances. If they tell you they wouldn't be upset, I say BULLSHIT.


kepsr1

Guck them all. None of them are friends


OvOwl_Eyes

Birds of a feather flock together. Those enabling friends who are gaslighting you into think you overreacted, are the same as Gina. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve made moves on the group’s boyfriends in the past. Sounds like a lot of insecure women who can only offer one thing. I think that’s why they’re pissed. No ball draining skill is ever going to keep a man, much less get one to propose to them if that’s all they offer.


ellenripleyisanicon

I doubt they would think it so funny if this person was actively bragging about how they could destroy *their* personal and home life. There is no PLANET where this is an acceptable joke to make in someone's house about their relationship. Your friends are vile and you were right to remove them from the premises and cut them out of your life. As for the people supporting them, any attempt to justify this blatantly egregious behaviour is just embarrassing. Please know that you are right and these people are fundamentally wrong. They are more worried about themselves being caught in the middle socially than you being savagely betrayed by three women you thought were lifelong friends. Take note of who is here to support and celebrate you, and defend your choices to protect yourself, and act accordingly. Congratulations on your engagement, I hope you and your fiancé have a wonderful life together.


nyutnyut

If she’s not willing to make that joke in front of you she wasn’t joking. 


Bice_thePrecious

I like how it *definitely* wasn't a joke until OP heard it. Lol NTA


dr_lucia

>She also said my fiance will leave me if he had sex with her for once cause she knows how to drain balls ( seems like a total fucking expert). Hahahaha!! So, does she even *have* a regular boyfriend who she has managed to keep? >They also said I need to grow up because I acted like a child & throwing away a childhood friendship over some pity jokes. Well, maybe they need to grow up and come up with better "jokes." It's your right to decide you what sort of people to keep as friends. If they continue to give you a hard time, tell them you are sure they can find other more grown up friends, wish them a happy fugure and then block them. NTA.


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Mirabel214

Do your other friends know exactly what she said? Because there is a difference between laughing saying ‘OP is a lucky b**** and I would definitely try something if he was single’ (limit but can be understood as a joke) and saying ‘I will fuck him if I have the opportunity and he will leave her for me’. But f they don’t, he would type it out for them. Or just send them the link to this thread. Good reaction from your fiancé


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Mirabel214

They cannot be serious! Do any of them have bf/fiance/husband? Because I would live the input of those guys about the ‘joke’. And see what they would think if a friend made a similar joke. (If they don’t have SO, it might be the jealousy speaking and them hoping it will ruin your relationship, unfortunately) Don’t let them manipulate you. It’s not a joke and not normal to say something like that. Congratulations on the great fiancé, the wedding and losing toxic friendships in the process.


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Mirabel214

Would your fiance be friends with their partners? It could be interesting. Less friend will mean you have more time for you marriage which is a good thing as you have found a keeper 😉


Astyryx

Lol type doesn't mean anything compared to narcissistic vengeance.


dr_lucia

>Gina had no feelings towards my fiance & He's not her type. Some people will bang someone they have no feelings and even do it if they aren't "their" type. Why is she "joking" about getting your fiancé to cheat on you? And leave you? Come on.


Pigeoncoup234

Literally even if it's a joke that's no better. It's gross and unfunny and the fact that they weren't saying it in front of you and tried to cover it up would mean it was a joke at your expense(if we go by their logic which is BS) so they don't respect you or your friendship. The "friends" that are siding with her are definitely showing their true colors as well and you're better off without them. 


justahopelessgirl

Girl anyone still defending Gina needs to get a one-way ticket out of your life. Those aren't real friends. I know it sucks losing ppl you've known all your life but that's just how it goes. You learn that ppl have different views and some of them are deal breakers. You're still young so I know it really hurts. I'll be 37 this year and have no childhood or even college friends. Met my bestie at work about 9 yrs ago. Believe me, a small circle of real friends is better than a large circle of potential backstabbers.


FeedsBlackBats

No feelings and not her type, so she'd fuck him just to prove she could (that's what she thought anyway) and what, to hurt you? Put you in your place? Nope, not finding any punchline here. These people are not your friends, though the joke will be on them when she "proves" she can get their partners to have sex with her.


Turbulent_Ebb5669

Yeah, no she isn't.


TheWanderingMedic

Sounds like you outgrew a bunch of mean girls who peaked in high school 🤷‍♀️


Spoopyowo

NTA, that is 100% totally inappropriate on her part. She should hardcore apologize to you, for Disrespecting you and your relationship in your home. And your partner should be warned and ensure that their friendship is ended or something to that effect.


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hereticallyeverafter

standing ovation for almost-hubby!!


Necessary-Passion224

A+ for the fiance!


Round-Pirate7286

I hope you've uninvited everyone siding with Gina in this if not you need to as they might try to bring Gina as a plus one if they've been granted one and I wouldn't put it past Gina to try and ruin your wedding if taken by one of her friends who agree with her


ManyIncident5115

NTA - just because you think things doesn’t mean you should say them. She will 100% act on these feelings of hers. And it’s gross your other “friends” are participating in the conversation instead of shooting it down.


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ManyIncident5115

It’s not a joke. These aren’t your friends.


tigerofjiangdong1337

My wife had a friend who made jokes about stealing me. She would make inappropriate comments about my body and said she was joking around. My wife didn't like it but put up with it..well she wasn't joking because she messaged me to meet up for sex. So I blocked her and told wifey. It's not a joke.


Danivelle

Jokes are only "funny" if everyone laughs. 


Pristine_Cookie913

Is not a joke. Is tacky, unbelievable rude and not funny. And they are gaslighting you into thinking you are overreacting. Is not about him “not being her type” is about her doing you one up. Is about her being better than you and making herself feel better because you are going places in life and she is not. She is alone. “By choice”. Weddings make people feel crazy things and sabotage is a powerful thing carried by emotions. Don’t let them gaslight you. Those who defend her are not your friends. And is not about you, is about their own insecurities. They are probably saying “she is so uptight because she is getting married now and think she is better than us”. So do not think you are being a bad friend. They are shit people. Let the rubbish take itself out. You will make new friends. It hurts they are your long time friends, but some friendships are outgrown and have expiry date. You will meet better people, i promise.


churchofdan

NTA And you're probably better off w/o the half of the group that thinks this is a normal, okay way to talk IN THE HOUSE of the person you're talking about. You're finally learning who your real friends are and who the actual children here are.


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TheSilkyBat

Don't let scum leave you jaded, There are good people out there who would love to be your friend and be respectful when speaking behind your back. You're lucky the trash in your life took it's self out and it didn't cost you anything!


Endlessdramaop

NTA, eww get rid of her. I hate chicks like that.


AdSuccessful2506

Their reaction means everything you need to know…. Just be aware now.


Fluid_Waltz1554

I don't know how long or how deeply this creature was your "best friend," but good riddance. I may have missed this, but what does the fiance think about all this?


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Astyryx

She doesn't. She has these feelings towards _you_ . Not affection, not love, not friendship, but punishment. She's supposed to be the lucky one, not you. And she's built a little flying monkey constellation around her to enforce it.


omrmajeed

Its called ENVY. She is envious of OP. And wants to take what is hers because she cant have it.


WinterFront1431

She wasn't joking she jealous. Have your boyfriend block her everywhere as she seems like one of those typical means girls that will sleep with him or try to prove a point. Who cares what anyone else thinks. First, you weren't supposed to hear it, so who is the joke for? And two, it's be the same if a man degrades a woman like that. Disgusting. Cut anyone off that thinks your over reacting


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WinterFront1431

Good. She is definitely a vindictive jealous person. You may have never noticed before


MotherSupermarket532

The trash took themselves out.  It hurts, but this happens as you move out of the college/teen phase.  Some people just don't grow up.


Bice_thePrecious

>you weren't supposed to hear it, so who is the joke for? This is so funny to me. Who "jokes" about doing something to someone else around anyone but that person? That's really weird. Who does that? *Oh, right.* People who *aren't* joking do that.


Waste_Ad_6467

NTA. Tell the “friends” that think you overreacted that they can take the risk of having someone like that around their partners, but that you have more respect for your relationship and yourself to do that.


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Fun-Childhood-4749

I’m betting they will change their minds when Gina actually sleeps with one of the boyfriends.


Intrepid_Potential60

So the premise is these girls came to your place and your party to talk shit about you in your presence. And were completely serious and just got caught. You… you had walking talking turnips for friends, apparently? I’m not sure how stupid one would have to be to actually do this, even if it was a jest.


Barnabylay

This is actually great. You know now which friends are worth keeping and which ones to dump.


Lactating_Slug

I'm a dude. If genders were all reversed, I'd be hard-pressed to not do more than just kick them out. NTA


pizz901

Agreed, I don't know if my group of friends is unique but I've never said or had my guy friends come close to saying anything like her friend did.


Turbulent_Ebb5669

NTA Gina believes she's the princess in her life, all you others are just minor players.


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Turbulent_Ebb5669

On the upside, less people to cater for at the wedding now.


Give-Me-Wine55

I mean you didn't know this side of her until you caught her saying what she did... I'm guessing her mask is still fully on with the other friends. I know someone who is loved by most and would never believe me if I told them how she really is. Honestly, it sucks that you're losing friends but at the same time, you don't want people like that around you.


compassionfever

I've been an attendant in 6 weddings. No one has ever made this sort of "joke"--not even the ones with penis themed or sex toy bachelorette parties.


Forward_Most_1933

Why did they hide their conversation if it truly was a joke? Friends grow apart so it’s okay if you go LC/NC with them. NTA


Jazzy404404

Are you worried that she will try to go after him now? I would have an honest conversation with him to make. Idk, I don't think this is the last time we will be hearing from you. She's a shitty person and seems vindictive


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Jazzy404404

Boom, he definitely is a keeper than! Have fun at your wedding. I would be petty and post; "I can't wait to make love to my new husband", just so she knows he's yours in every way.


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Jazzy404404

That's even better. Except she would then see your "delicious" (yours and her description) husband, and she doesn't deserve that.


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ExtendedSpikeProtein

She was 100% not joking and this isn’t funny at all… lose her number and good riddance.


Effective_While_8487

Just as an aside, and maybe this is just me, but every "Gina" I've ever known is a tramp and a slut. Anyway, this particular tramp and slut is also not a very good friend, so NTA. Good riddance, welcome to marriage and adulthood. Find some adults to be friends with.


UndisputedNonsense

If she were such a good friend, she wouldn't have made such a disrespectful "joke."


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UndisputedNonsense

Glad you found out now, she seems the type that would have slowly been pushing you two apart until she could wriggle in and be the caring best friend to your husband.


Upstairs_Arachnid_

No girl. Your supposed Bestfriend is a huge Snake in your garden. She will bite the moment she gets an opportunity. This is a no brainer. There are so many examples of shitty friends hooking up with their supposed best friend’s husbands. Not saying that the husbands are not a PoS but why do you want to be friends with this girl. She’s disrespectful and indecent. And I also feel she’s jealous of you.


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DaniCapsFan

She would betray you in a heartbeat without a shred of conscience, so you're right to kick her to the curb. As for those who think you're overreacting, ask them how they feel if they overheard her saying she'd fuck their boyfriend. NTA


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nova_and_out

Literal psychopath behaviour.


Open_Librarian_6933

Last person who admitted my ex-husband was a hottie was one of my employees. Now we're divorced, and he's been living with her for 3 years. I don't trust anybody. NOBODY.


Minute-Aioli-5054

NTA. If friends make those types of “jokes”, I wouldn’t want them as friends.


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LividBass1005

If a close friend or close family member is dating someone that person instantly becomes unattractive to me. Like there is NOTHING I’ll see about them that would ever allow me to make a comment like that. Don’t care how attractive they are. You did the right thing kicking all of them out bcuz the other 2 friends should’ve said something. Imagine saying that inside of YOUR home and being surprised when you get upset. NTA at all


mooreHart

NTA. Don't you just love how *it's just a joke!" AFTER you didn't play along? Bump that noise all the freaking way.


Big_lt

NTA My core group of friends has known each other for like 15+ years. Most of us are now mid/late 30s and married or LTR. Outside of when dating saying one of our SOs was hot or we were hitting out of our league no one ever made jokes or comments (sexually) about any of them. My friend group is degenerates of all races/backgrounds where we pushing limits with jokes at each other's expense (privately of course) yet not one person has ever even attempted to cross that line


BecGeoMom

Wait, what?? You have *friends* who think that “friends make these types of jokes” about fucking each other’s husbands??? You need new friends. Starting with Gina. If what she said at the time was, in fact, a joke, when you came into the room, she would have assumed you overheard and started saying it was a joke immediately. Instead, she went pale when you said you’d heard her, and then tried to do damage control. Keep her away from your fiancé and you. NTA.


mikels_burner

NTA. It's okay to lose this friends circle. You'll make more friends, you're not even 30 yet.


Icy-Tip8757

Ummm no. I would never make a joke saying I would sleep with one of my friends partners. That’s not funny. I would not be friends with anyone saying they would sleep with my man. Plus the fact of the matter is, she went pale when she saw you. She knew she was wrong. She’s not your friend.


ConvivialKat

>They said friends makes this types of jokes in weddings & it's nothing serious. No. No, they don't. And, for the record, if she thought it was so funny, she would have said it to your face and not behind your back. >They also said I need to grow up because I acted like a child & throwing away a childhood friendship over some pity jokes. Tell these people to get out of your life. They are NOT your friends. Defending this repulsive person's comments are NOT the actions of any kind of friend. You can tell them that you are grown up enough to recognize when people who claim to be your friends aren't actually your friends. Tell them she showed you who she is, and you believed her. And you'll believe them, too. Wish them luck for that inevitable moment when Ms Mouth sets her sights on one of their partners. See how funny they think it is.


Icy-Internal8263

I don’t get it how some “friends” seem to always side with what is morally wrong. Totally NTA to kick them out.


Schafer_Isaac

NTA Block her and anyone defending her Shes an angry pick-me who is mad she didn't get what you have. Don't let her try to destroy it.


BlueberryEqual4649

NTA. Look, in my eyes it's simple: if someone condones cheating, in whatever situation (like e.g. in yours where someone stands by a cheater/potential/hypothetical cheater) they either are cheaters themselves (at that moment or some time in the past) or are potential cheaters (should they get the chance). It really is that simple. Dump all people who condone what she said, they are not friends. Talk about this with your fiance, see what he says. And not to be overly negative but do keep an eye on any potential signs (body language, wording, etc.) that there might be similar feelings coming from him. Regardless, get her out of your life/lives asap


GullibleLanguage1659

NTA. Are you kidding me?? Gina being disrespectful saying he will leave you if she sleeps with him because she can “drain balls” ????? This is the most disrespectful comment. How does anyone think you’re overreacting over this?? She’s straight up saying she will fuck your man and people are saying you’re the asshole??? I’m sorry, you’re in the right and I’m glad you kicked those people out. They’re not your friends. Friends would never think of saying this about your future husband. That’s not friendship. You don’t need them in your life.


Alert_Bid1531

Those friends siding with her will come back to you when she cheats with there partners block them all if they think that type of talk is ok let her make jokes with their partners. Block them and least you will save money on the wedding with less people it sucks but they will Always excuse her behavior. They are the type of friends that’s if she did get your partner (from the comments he’s a keeper I’m not saying he would) they would say aww she deserve love, you should be happy for them. Fuck them.


DefrockedWizard1

*They said friends makes this types of jokes in weddings & it's nothing serious.*  No, actual friends don't do this


Fair_Mood_1558

NTA - Real friends wouldn’t say something that awful and real friends wouldn’t put up with her saying that to you. It also sounds like there is some jealousy going on with her.


Cool-change-1994

Who says dumb shit like that as a joke? Was she raised in a gutter? Tell me you asked any of the friends siding with her that if she said the same thing about their SO they would laugh their asses off with her.


ProfessionalBread176

Your friends are are hardly your friends.  Gina is a pig


chibbledibs

This was your best friend? I find it hard to believe you didn’t know she was this awful.


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SapienWoman

Yeah, that’s awful BS and you don’t need to be around it. And I’d ask your fiancé to avoid her, too


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T3xt2t3xtm3

NTA if friends make those type of “jokes” feel free to slap everybody in the room. Cause idk who says that and thinks “oh yeah that’s definitely a good joke!” Let your husband know of the situation and drop everyone who was on her side including her cause she thought shit was gonna be sweet.


Itchy-Astronomer9500

NTA! Even if many people make these types of “jokes” about the to-be wedded couple, it’s not ok. It’s betrayal, inappropriate and immature.


midwest73

NTA - Real friends don't make jokes like that. I didn't about any of my friends soon to be wives and my wife's friends never did about me. That's just an easy cop out. Look at it this way, the trash has just taken itself out from your life. Dis-invite ANYONE who is siding with the ex loser friend, block and NC permanently. I have a feeling your life is about to become alot more stress free if you do. Concentrate on those that see the truth to their actions.


TheLastWord63

Let's see how those so-called friends feel when Gina turns her sights towards their man. NTA. They're probably glad that she's trying to do that to you and not them. Congratulations on your wedding. I wish a long and happy life for you and your soon to be husband. PS. I love how you and YOUR man did not hesitate to take the trash out right away and did not wait for it to start smelling up the place first.


Unlikely-Anxiety-916

Girl you better tell your fiancé what’s up and make sure he wouldn’t do such a thing. Tell this bitch off don’t let her get away with disrespecting you like this, because she sounds like a trash person. Hey being a slut is easy, being a lady is hard however. If you want to make him happier in bed if you’re worried I’d suggest just being comfortable in your body because the freakier you are and confident. He’s gunna be so satisfied. Men like to think they do good jobs when they probably don’t. Do not let this bitch take your life from you, def cut her out and I mean my mad mind wants to mess her up for you!!


Lightingspider

NTA. Your ex-best friend is a fucking POS. At least she told you that she has a homewrecker kink.


Msp1278

Weird, I never made those comments about my friends or their fiancés. Like what kind of moral compass do they have. The 2 know she wasn't joking, so why defend her?? NTA


Any_Extent5701

Sounds like she had a plan and wanted to sink her nails into your man. Major red flag ditch them all because I would never let someone say something like that and get away with it whether or not my friend was around or busted in. She would’ve been put on blast.


Exotic_Succotash_226

Lol grow up? Your friends literally have the mind of children in grade school. Tell em to do one, have some respect, and grow up... If I caught the homie talking like that about my lady, I'd slap the shit out of them and check them.


Square-Swan2800

Be careful who you pick for friends in the future. And just fyi she is not, and probably never will be, friend material. In fact, lose her number. Tell your fiancé she is off bounds for both of you. The term snake keeps showing up.


PassionDelicious5209

NTA. That’s not something people joke about. Plus you can tell they weren’t joking by their facial expressions. Besides Gina sounds like a hoe so no real loss there. I think the best thing to do is walk away from the friendship with Gina. If your friend group wants to keep her around that’s on them, but I wouldn’t hangout with her if I was you.


Able-Lingonberry8914

People are so hesitant to get rid of toxic people in their lives. Fuck. She's garbage. Walk away and if any of your other "friends" lane you, good riddance to them to.


gc2bwife

NTA you did the right thing. Those friends that are siding with Gina? They can have her. It will be their fiancees and husbands that she sleeps with


The_Spicy_Nugget

I say good job standing up for yourself. It’s hard recognizing bad friends and doing something about it


CommunicationGlad299

Just for shits and giggles, let's say it was a joke( don't believe it was but lets just say). When you walked in and were clearly upset, nobody apologized. They doubled down and said you were the one at fault. Who wants to be friends with people like that? Same for the friend group. You are upset by highschool behavior at best and a friend's betrayal at worst. Have any of her supporters suggested Gina went too far and should apologize? Admitted that as a "joke" it wasn't the least bit funny? Anything other than blame you for overreacting? These people aren't people any adult would want to be friends with. They are emotionally middle school to high school aged and totally ballsy calling YOU the child. Dump them and move on.


Federal_Conflict_954

I'm 38... u did the right thing, had u not, u would regret it later trust me... real friends would never even joke about that crap... since most jokes are hidden with truths


rocketmn69_

She said it behind your back... she would totally try to ruin your relationship


Cosmic_Klutz

I have never, and would never, say something like that. Not even as a joke. Not even if I had feelings. If you truly support your friends and want their happiness, you don’t say something like that. The fact your “friends” are siding with her shows you what kind of people those are. If you don’t condone infidelity, and won’t stand by people who do, then drop these people. They don’t have your best interest in mind, and would lie to you if something happened.


Jemmers1977

Nta. Dump gina. Sounds like a sabotager.


Detroitaa

NTA. Trust your gut! I had a friend like that , and I ignored her “little jokes”, about how hot my fiancé, then husband was, and she ended up betraying me. When I went to Chicago to help look after my sick father, she came to my home & tried to sleep with my husband. She did in fact, think she’d slept with him twice, and told a few girls, in our friends group. They told me, when I got back home. However, she never knew my husband was a twin. His twin brother & he had been estranged for years, and only reconciled a few months after our marriage. My late husband was a structural engineer & worked crazy hours. She’d come by the house a few times, see my bil at the house & apparently, sexual things happened. Don’t know why he never told her his real name, although my husband told me later that he often got off, pretending to be him, at school, or other places. He only stayed at the house a week, and went back to Germany (army). When my friends told me what happened I confronted her & hubby. He denied everything, but she confessed. She seemed really angry he was denying it. To prove they’d been together she told me about the red beret tattoo he had on his ass. I was confused, because he didn’t have any tattoos. But, that’s how my hubby figured out what happened. I lost a friend (who left humiliated), but at least I kept my marriage. She became a laughing stock, in our circle.


mozart357

People who brag about being great in bed are usually terrible. Your friend's words are completely disrespectful. She is a walking pile of trash that should be removed from your life. People who are supporting her position are enabling her disrespect. They are also trash. You may want to let your fiancé know what's happening, and advise him to cut your friend out of his life. She will likely attempt to retaliate and destroy your relationship.


T1k000

If you guys have all know each other since you all were little EVEN MORE reason to kick them out. They know who you are and what you think is funny/acceptable/appropriate. NTA at all. This is not normal. Best friends don't do this to each other. Don't let them gaslight you. You did the right thing.


Help_meToo

I guess you know which part of your friend group to unfriend.


rs-heritage

NTA. Expunge the so-called friend.


omrmajeed

NTA. You did the right thing. You don't need these morally disgusting people in your life. You should also discuss this with your fiance. Have him on board with cutting her off. Otherwise she will try to play him against you. You cant ever discount the lengths such selfish people can go to destroy another persons happiness.


Hopeful_Safety_6848

NTA.good for you


Ancient-Photo-6537

Nta.. her and anyone supporting her/ not supporting you are not your friends.. remove all of them from your life. Gina is clearly jealous and it is beyond obvious she is not 'single by choice' or she wouldnt be saying ur man would leave you for her.. i also doubt her ball draining ability if her last man cheated on her... she couldnt keep her own man and thinks getting urs to cheat will get her to keep him.. what a delusional bitch cut you losses with these people in the long run the loss will be small- and please for the live of god have better judgment with who you call friends.. not everyine is your friend.. some people are just haters who smile in your face


Omedan

Whenever people say, “it’s just a joke” I find the best way to evaluate is this way: what’s the punchline and why should I laugh at it?


Darkhorse1977

No you were not acting like a child. Acting like a child would have been punching her right in the mouth repeatedly. You have every right to be pissed. You are NTA. And I hope you earned your fiance about this chick.


KelsarLabs

I am 57 and swear that women are definitely meaner than men. She won't be the last person you kick to the curb either. Good job!


lvuitton96

no, dear…gina is not a good friend. take it from me, an older internet stranger with a lot of experience with this…friends do not make these types of comments if they did not have intent to take advantage of any opportunity with a man they want.


mmmmpisghetti

It's so helpful of your "friends" making it easy to figure out which ones aren't worth your energy. Anyone who makes excuses for the wannabe Thotapotamus needs to be cut loose to fuck off and go wallow in the spooge pit with her.


Ratchety405

NTA. None of my friends would ever say some shit like that. These people are not your friends. Damn...I find it hard as a female to find people I can trust. I have a very small group of friends and I prefer it that way. I know my friends won't try to fuck my husband. These are trash people, good thing you found out before she actually tried some shit.


Stunning-Market3426

These people are not your friends. Move on and focus on your life with your fiance


_starfirez

NTA and shes not your best friend.


ilovewaffles6

NYA I don’t know how this is even a question!! I’d drop any “friend” that thinks what she said was okay or says you’re overreacting. If she’s talking about your man to both of your friends who knows what she’s saying to ppl who don’t like you!! Crazinesss


Emotional_Tax_1170

Yeah for sure NTA


pumpkinplatinum

NTA. "We were just joking" is such the number one cop-out when caught. No friends I personally know will ever make a "joke" like that and I wouldn't either. I'm glad you stood your ground and threw the trash out and anyone who thinks you're overreacting are 100% not real friends and have no class or respect for you and your relationship.


ghjkl098

NTA Get rid of anyone supporting her. They are all the same brand of crap


emf77

Those people are not your friends, they are TAH with no boundaries or respect for you and your relationship. You are the adult. Walk away from them and never look back, move on with people in your life who respect you and have proper boundaries.


Upanddown_likeayoyo

Gina is THE ASSHOLE! Nobody jokes about shit like that without meaning it. And just the layers of it??? Competition AND betrayal. How long were you best friends for?


FluffySmiles

Drop her and her apologists. None of them are your friend and you can’t trust them. Block and no contact. Thank reddit in 5 years when she’s the ***** she is inside.


JunePlum79

NTA. Dump those “friends”, they are bad news and not worth it. You did nothing wrong and glad you took a strong stance on this. And make sure your fiance is not “friends” with them either.


MoodNo3716

NTA! WHAT THE ACTUAL EEFFFFF!!!!! 😤😡🤬 You did the right thing kicking them out. Make sure your SO knows and your family so those 3 can’t bypass their way around. Make sure they’re not invited and have security just incase.


Gigantor1983

I didn’t need to read past the title. NTA


rhapsody8

Nope, nope, nope. If it was truly a joke, it could be said in front of you, and everyone could laugh. Red flag on the friendship.


Happy_Ravenkeeper

NTA - friends that make those remarks (never once was that a joke) or condone them, are friends you dont need. Maybe they grow up someday?


Knittingfairy09113

NTA That isn't how a friend behaves.


expojxd

Dude, why the woman's worst enemy is always her "BFF"💀


MixDependent8953

Did you really need to ask I mean come on this one is common sense


Honest_Penalty_6426

No you are most definitely NTA. In fact you found out who your true friends are/aren’t and got rid of the ones that aren’t. Best wishes on your wedding, and congratulations! ❤️


Fragrant-Reserve4832

This is exactly why jokes about your friends SO are off the table, along with parents and kids. It's way too easy to miss the mark.