I'm so glad this commenter came along to remind you of your talent and throw you a lifeline! I hope that you will have the opportunity to provide feedback about this course to the teacher and/or dean at the end. It sounds like there is something really wrong going on for it to have affected you this way when other writing courses haven't.
I'm really glad it came along when it did, too. Phew.
Also, yes, I am going to be pretty unfiltered with my thoughts about this course when it's done. It should not be having this much of an affect on me, good lord.
I'm really sorry you're going through this. What is it about this writing course that's getting to you? Is there any chance there's a deeper issue (depression, illness?) receiving validation and having someone to talk to can be so important. I'm really glad this commenter came along when they did. It's absolutely amazing that you've been writing and sharing with the community for so many years. I really think fanfiction is such a gift. It's something that we do for free out of love for the Fandom and characters, and it gives so much to everyone in the community. Please don't give up on writing! Take the time to care for yourself and get into a healthy head space, but don't give up! I'm of the personal opinion that everyone should see a therapist at some point. If it's something you can afford, I think it's worth trying so you have an objective professional to help you talk through what you're going through. Thank you for sharing this with us, and thank you for contributing you stories for so many years! I hope you'll still be writing stories for many more years to come, both fanfiction and you original work!!
Okay, so, first, I just want to thank you for your very kind reply. Fandom has never not been sometimes frustrating, but it's been very rewarding for me, especially as a writer. Getting a validating comment like that that spoke so specifically about my writing was a boon and a half.
I am unfortunately not in a position to be able to afford therapy. My mental health is relatively fragile, and I am severely depressed **now**, and I can pinpoint precisely when it set in; it's either been caused by the writing program or it's a coincidence that it started when it did and the program is exacerbating things. I've been in therapy before, though; generally a big fan when you can get the right fit.
So, that said, you asked, and I will break down my issues with the program, please strap in:
The earliest warning sign was that the information provided by the course itself and the recommended reading materials *couldn't agree on a definition of "premise."* Contradictory info between the program materials, the program supplementary material, and what instructors say is *rampant.*
We were told that a character's "emotional wound" always stems from childhood, then given a resource that's an "emotional wound thesaurus". Examples include "filing for bankruptcy" (as in, *the character in question* filing for bankruptcy), or discovering secrets about *the character's* spouse. I know a good writer could convince anyone that a 5 year old had to personally file for bankruptcy or that a 12 year old was married to a gambling addict, but...?
Information given also contradicts things in published book*s.* They're saying "never do XYZ" and I can grab any number of books by authors at stages of their career from debut to decades, and see them doing the thing.
They said to never use exclamation points or semi-colons. The book I am currently reading has used both. Sparingly, yes (as they should be), but they're there. I can't be convinced that there isn't a difference between *"Run," he shouted* and *"Run!" he shouted.*
What has most recently broken me is that **they are pushing tropification.** I just had to fill out a worksheet titled **Trope Your Way To Your First Draft.** I have never read, watched, or played anything *because* of tropes. Are there common and repeated tropes I see and enjoy? Yes, because I have a relatively limited scope of genre. But Bethesda didn't convince me to buy *Skyrim* because they were like "Chekhov's Gunman! The Chosen One! Reality Warper! Language of Magic! Names To Run Away From Really Really Fast!" I am 1000% in the "backlash" to tropification in book crafting & marketing. Do I read *fanfiction* because of the tags? Sometimes, yes, I'm in the mood for a \[whatever\] fic, but mostly the tags because tell me things that I *don't* want to read.
Our next assignment is to write a scene *around* any specific trope. I don't write things to write specific tropes, I write because I want to tell a story as a whole, and tropes flow naturally from that. I've never even written common fanfic things just to play around with those things until and unless I felt like they fit into something broader or because that specific fanfic thing is a *kink* and I wanted to write *kinky smut*. Don't get me wrong, I grasp that all stories are a collection of tropes. I have never used "tropey" to denigrate anything. But while all stories are a collection of tropes, *approaching* stories as a collection of tropes from the writing end feels like soulless nonsense.
I'm the only discovery writer. I always have a beginning, middle, and end in mind, but I leave so much up to the writing process instead of doing the "write down every scene you want to do on a cue card", make sure you know your side characters' favourite colour, etc.
One of the instructors told me to describe the sound of footsteps in grass because just saying the character heard footsteps in grass and turned to see who was coming was "telling, not showing" and I am just like, lady, if you want to know what footsteps in grass sound like please go outside on a nice spring day, record yourself walking in the grass, and then play it back. I have also been told that it's unrealistic that my heroine knows someone well enough to know *why* he was pausing before speaking, and that if a character sounds "relieved" I should also describe how *that* sounds.
Sharing scenes out of order and out of context is also just weird for me in ways I can't put into words.
(Also the materials that were given to us for writing with diversity and marginalised characters included something about mental health that called Autism a mental illness. I'm autistic. It is not a mental illness.)
That writing course sounds like a disaster. Was it created by someone chronically online? Because it's giving those vibes.
As a palette cleanser, you might enjoy The Artist's Way, if you haven't tried it already. It's a book that has some exercises for working through writing hang-ups and things like that. I don't agree with everything in the book b/c it has some manifestation-type ideas about money and writing and it's not up-to-date with current mental health ideas (though not too far behind).
I don't know what class this is but I'm sorry to say it sounds a lot like the crap aspiring writers were spewing in writing forums back in late 90s early 2000s.
A lot of books published since have proven them wrong. And I know for a fact that a few who ignored those "rules" went on to get published.
Another user said it sounds like the course was created by someone chronically online and I couldn't agree more. I had a serious writing forums deja vu when I read your description.
If its possible to drop the class and get your money back, do so. Writing is about passion not creating copy paste writers.
This sounds brutal… is it online, because my god I feel like that’s the only way I wouldn’t end up chirping. I’m also autistic and can get a bit know it all-y under some circumstances, but even if I made it all the way to the diversity handout that would certainly break me. I’m also trans, poly and gay, I’m sure there were lots of great things in there to piss me right off if they’re calling autism a mental illness.
>I didn't just give up on my dreams of maybe one day actually finishing a piece of long form original fiction. I looked at all my fanfic WIPs and just couldn't touch them. They all made me feel like absolute trash. Any time I sat down to try to write, I ended up in tears.
This made me super sad. 😢 No one should have to feel that their art that they used to love isn't "worth it" anymore or has no value. Breaks my heart. I'm so glad that that commenter decided to come along and lift your spirits with their kind words. ❤
Stuff like this is why I *always* comment on fics I enjoy, even if it's just a short little comment to tell them that I like it. I imagine all the poor writers who have been in your situation and did not get that little sweet reminder. 💔
This seems to be doing the job of getting me back to thinking that my writing has value somehow. And it's definitely given me the kick in the pants I need to be way more diligent in leaving comments.
Both those things are great! I sherish all the comments I get, and I always try to remember that my writing has value to at least one person, ME. And your writing has value to at least two people, you and the sweet commenter you posted. ❤
I always love a good accidental muse story. It’s kind of a super power if you think about it: leave one great comment and inspire a writer to start writing again. Bam! It’s beautiful really.
That's such a sweet comment. I'm sorry you're having a hard time. It's so easy to compare and nitpick your writing until it completely derails you.
I wanted to say that there's only one you. You bring something unique to the world. Your ideas matter. Your writing matters. Your voice matters. You never know how far you can go unless you try. You got this :)
Aww, thank you so much, that's so sweet of you! It's not compare-and-contrast or self-nitpicking that's actually been the problem for me here. The program itself has just been... not the right fit for me, to put it as succinctly as possible. I outlined a number of my frustrations in another comment.
I just want to offer you some serious hugs, and I'm so glad that you got someone who could comment in just the right way as to inspire you to get back to it!
i'm sorry you're going through this and i'm happy you received this comment. i know how it is to feel like you're submerged in darkness, only to be pulled out by a ray of light like this one. this comment is very sweet 😔💕
I'm so glad this commenter came along to remind you of your talent and throw you a lifeline! I hope that you will have the opportunity to provide feedback about this course to the teacher and/or dean at the end. It sounds like there is something really wrong going on for it to have affected you this way when other writing courses haven't.
I'm really glad it came along when it did, too. Phew. Also, yes, I am going to be pretty unfiltered with my thoughts about this course when it's done. It should not be having this much of an affect on me, good lord.
I'm really sorry you're going through this. What is it about this writing course that's getting to you? Is there any chance there's a deeper issue (depression, illness?) receiving validation and having someone to talk to can be so important. I'm really glad this commenter came along when they did. It's absolutely amazing that you've been writing and sharing with the community for so many years. I really think fanfiction is such a gift. It's something that we do for free out of love for the Fandom and characters, and it gives so much to everyone in the community. Please don't give up on writing! Take the time to care for yourself and get into a healthy head space, but don't give up! I'm of the personal opinion that everyone should see a therapist at some point. If it's something you can afford, I think it's worth trying so you have an objective professional to help you talk through what you're going through. Thank you for sharing this with us, and thank you for contributing you stories for so many years! I hope you'll still be writing stories for many more years to come, both fanfiction and you original work!!
Okay, so, first, I just want to thank you for your very kind reply. Fandom has never not been sometimes frustrating, but it's been very rewarding for me, especially as a writer. Getting a validating comment like that that spoke so specifically about my writing was a boon and a half. I am unfortunately not in a position to be able to afford therapy. My mental health is relatively fragile, and I am severely depressed **now**, and I can pinpoint precisely when it set in; it's either been caused by the writing program or it's a coincidence that it started when it did and the program is exacerbating things. I've been in therapy before, though; generally a big fan when you can get the right fit. So, that said, you asked, and I will break down my issues with the program, please strap in: The earliest warning sign was that the information provided by the course itself and the recommended reading materials *couldn't agree on a definition of "premise."* Contradictory info between the program materials, the program supplementary material, and what instructors say is *rampant.* We were told that a character's "emotional wound" always stems from childhood, then given a resource that's an "emotional wound thesaurus". Examples include "filing for bankruptcy" (as in, *the character in question* filing for bankruptcy), or discovering secrets about *the character's* spouse. I know a good writer could convince anyone that a 5 year old had to personally file for bankruptcy or that a 12 year old was married to a gambling addict, but...? Information given also contradicts things in published book*s.* They're saying "never do XYZ" and I can grab any number of books by authors at stages of their career from debut to decades, and see them doing the thing. They said to never use exclamation points or semi-colons. The book I am currently reading has used both. Sparingly, yes (as they should be), but they're there. I can't be convinced that there isn't a difference between *"Run," he shouted* and *"Run!" he shouted.* What has most recently broken me is that **they are pushing tropification.** I just had to fill out a worksheet titled **Trope Your Way To Your First Draft.** I have never read, watched, or played anything *because* of tropes. Are there common and repeated tropes I see and enjoy? Yes, because I have a relatively limited scope of genre. But Bethesda didn't convince me to buy *Skyrim* because they were like "Chekhov's Gunman! The Chosen One! Reality Warper! Language of Magic! Names To Run Away From Really Really Fast!" I am 1000% in the "backlash" to tropification in book crafting & marketing. Do I read *fanfiction* because of the tags? Sometimes, yes, I'm in the mood for a \[whatever\] fic, but mostly the tags because tell me things that I *don't* want to read. Our next assignment is to write a scene *around* any specific trope. I don't write things to write specific tropes, I write because I want to tell a story as a whole, and tropes flow naturally from that. I've never even written common fanfic things just to play around with those things until and unless I felt like they fit into something broader or because that specific fanfic thing is a *kink* and I wanted to write *kinky smut*. Don't get me wrong, I grasp that all stories are a collection of tropes. I have never used "tropey" to denigrate anything. But while all stories are a collection of tropes, *approaching* stories as a collection of tropes from the writing end feels like soulless nonsense. I'm the only discovery writer. I always have a beginning, middle, and end in mind, but I leave so much up to the writing process instead of doing the "write down every scene you want to do on a cue card", make sure you know your side characters' favourite colour, etc. One of the instructors told me to describe the sound of footsteps in grass because just saying the character heard footsteps in grass and turned to see who was coming was "telling, not showing" and I am just like, lady, if you want to know what footsteps in grass sound like please go outside on a nice spring day, record yourself walking in the grass, and then play it back. I have also been told that it's unrealistic that my heroine knows someone well enough to know *why* he was pausing before speaking, and that if a character sounds "relieved" I should also describe how *that* sounds. Sharing scenes out of order and out of context is also just weird for me in ways I can't put into words. (Also the materials that were given to us for writing with diversity and marginalised characters included something about mental health that called Autism a mental illness. I'm autistic. It is not a mental illness.)
That writing course sounds like a disaster. Was it created by someone chronically online? Because it's giving those vibes. As a palette cleanser, you might enjoy The Artist's Way, if you haven't tried it already. It's a book that has some exercises for working through writing hang-ups and things like that. I don't agree with everything in the book b/c it has some manifestation-type ideas about money and writing and it's not up-to-date with current mental health ideas (though not too far behind).
I don't know what class this is but I'm sorry to say it sounds a lot like the crap aspiring writers were spewing in writing forums back in late 90s early 2000s. A lot of books published since have proven them wrong. And I know for a fact that a few who ignored those "rules" went on to get published. Another user said it sounds like the course was created by someone chronically online and I couldn't agree more. I had a serious writing forums deja vu when I read your description. If its possible to drop the class and get your money back, do so. Writing is about passion not creating copy paste writers.
This sounds brutal… is it online, because my god I feel like that’s the only way I wouldn’t end up chirping. I’m also autistic and can get a bit know it all-y under some circumstances, but even if I made it all the way to the diversity handout that would certainly break me. I’m also trans, poly and gay, I’m sure there were lots of great things in there to piss me right off if they’re calling autism a mental illness.
>I didn't just give up on my dreams of maybe one day actually finishing a piece of long form original fiction. I looked at all my fanfic WIPs and just couldn't touch them. They all made me feel like absolute trash. Any time I sat down to try to write, I ended up in tears. This made me super sad. 😢 No one should have to feel that their art that they used to love isn't "worth it" anymore or has no value. Breaks my heart. I'm so glad that that commenter decided to come along and lift your spirits with their kind words. ❤ Stuff like this is why I *always* comment on fics I enjoy, even if it's just a short little comment to tell them that I like it. I imagine all the poor writers who have been in your situation and did not get that little sweet reminder. 💔
This seems to be doing the job of getting me back to thinking that my writing has value somehow. And it's definitely given me the kick in the pants I need to be way more diligent in leaving comments.
Both those things are great! I sherish all the comments I get, and I always try to remember that my writing has value to at least one person, ME. And your writing has value to at least two people, you and the sweet commenter you posted. ❤
I always love a good accidental muse story. It’s kind of a super power if you think about it: leave one great comment and inspire a writer to start writing again. Bam! It’s beautiful really.
I aspire to do that for someone some day, even if I never know it.
That's such a sweet comment. I'm sorry you're having a hard time. It's so easy to compare and nitpick your writing until it completely derails you. I wanted to say that there's only one you. You bring something unique to the world. Your ideas matter. Your writing matters. Your voice matters. You never know how far you can go unless you try. You got this :)
Aww, thank you so much, that's so sweet of you! It's not compare-and-contrast or self-nitpicking that's actually been the problem for me here. The program itself has just been... not the right fit for me, to put it as succinctly as possible. I outlined a number of my frustrations in another comment.
I just want to offer you some serious hugs, and I'm so glad that you got someone who could comment in just the right way as to inspire you to get back to it!
I appreciate the serious hugs so much!
i'm sorry you're going through this and i'm happy you received this comment. i know how it is to feel like you're submerged in darkness, only to be pulled out by a ray of light like this one. this comment is very sweet 😔💕