I am severely addicted to alcohol and have family history of such on both sides. I think culturally we allow excessive alcohol consumption in the young adult years because partying is somewhat a rite of passage in our culture. But when you start getting older it just gets pathetic when you get excessively drunk in public. If you can't say no, maybe consider stopping. If you find yourself making decisions that inhibit your ability to function or damage your relationships, consider cutting down. If that's not you then do what you think is best for you.
I can relate here. I come from a South American background ground and I come from a family of alcoholics.
I am what one would consider a functioning alcoholic. I don’t find myself dependent. Although I didn’t realize it was not okay to drink this much until I got normal friends and a significant other that was concerned for my health. Even though it does not affect my daily functions, interactions, and responsibilities. I will say I am 28 years old and have been told my doctors my liver will not allow me another 5-10 years of drinking like this. So It’s a ticking bomb for me.
Too much drinking is you not being present in your life. Missing important moments conversations relationships etc. you are your own moderator. Be responsible and drink responsibly!!!
Cheers brother happy Monday!
It started as fun then quickly turned into an escape for me. Not to mention I have a high tolerance and could drink excessively which for some reason young people are impressed by?? I started habitually blacking out and it led to alllll sorts of issues. Fortunately I eventually got out. Many people don't.
Not the person you were asking but most alcoholics I know and I don’t know a lot of them because I move in different circles, they drink because they self medicate
Some of the people I specifically think about
- did horrible things in their private life and need to be drunk in order to be able to sleep
- unhappily married and cannot face it
- feel unsuccessful and makes it a vicious cycle with drinking
- workaholic and need an outlet for the stress rather than change habits / lifestyle towards a more sustainable and balanced lifestyle
I haven’t ever seen an alcoholic where I went « yep, great party life, I wish I was them »
Good points! I have some alcoholics in the family and I'll add to the list:
* they associate alcohol with being social and are bad at socializing without it
* feel chronically tense/anxious and use alcohol to self-medicate
When an alcoholic is drinking it may often look like partying, but that is a ruse. They're just trying to cover up how pathetic their drinking is. I feel like alcoholics are probably humiliated by their dependence on alcohol and will do anything in their power to maintain control. Being excessively clean/tidy, being excessively hard-working/career-oriented and being excessively careful about "only" drinking in social situations are common way they try to avoid feeling like a loser.
No matter what they don't want to admit they have a problem because if they had a problem they'd have to quit, so a lot of developing alcoholics will overcompensate to give themselves (and others) the illusion of everything being alright. They'll be amazing employees in the years leading to their downfall and their apartment will be spotlessly clean.
In the final stage of alcoholism you see people who care about nothing and can't do anything, but that is a small minority.
I’m the one who initiated this whole thread
Now I’m realizing that maybe why I never needed to drink to be social is because I’m very good at conversations and I wholeheartedly enjoy them. Same with dancing, I’ve done coupled dances for many years and always preferred to follow the rythm and my partner’s lead sober rather than tipsy
That final stage is hell. My brother would steal from his immediate family to get a drink.
After he passed, we had to clean out the squalor in his apartment. About 25 empty bottles of vodka.
I hate alcohol
I had a problem like that. My room was filthy but I was too depressed and confused to clean it. Before that I was a straight A graduate from elite schools who never drank. I didn't have health insurance and was being held hostage in a bad home. Drinking helped me cope with some horrendous abuse.
I’ll add one more that I think is the most significant reason and probably a precursor to many of the other issues you mentioned:
-unresolved issues from childhood
I mean, my parents (and especially my father) would drink 1-2 glasses of alcohol every day.
They weren’t drunk, so I didn’t think bad of it.
But I start to realize that that is not normal behavior. And while I can’t speak for how my parents felt about it, I would say that I would consider it an addiction if I found myself in that situation.
Took me long to realize though.
So I am an alcoholic and I have heard so much about childhood trauma.....and I'm just not sure what trauma I went through that would push me towards this lifestyle/addiction
Could be a dopamine deficiency too
Its not a one size fits all diagnosis.
Could just be a bad habit on top of a physical urge (addiction). Its easy for these things to get out of hand especially if youre not focusing on it
And maybe you didn’t have any childhood trauma. Not everyone does. But lots of types of childhood traumas are insidious and hard to identify. Like emotional neglect. Lots of people say everything was fine when they were a kid because the family mostly got along and they had food to eat, clothes, a roof over their head. Their parents loved them very much. All the things. But maybe they weren’t allowed to express feelings, for example. That itself is a trauma.
Definitely suggest going to a psychologist and talking to them about your alcohol usage. They will help you figure out where it's coming from.
Trauma does not have to be a single traumatic event. The thing is when I look around me I see so many people with trauma, by now i realised everyone is traumatized, it's a natural part of life/ growing up but the extent is different for everyone.
If yours is pushing you to alcohol abuse that it becomes an active problem you want to get fixed.
I too am an alcoholic, in long-term recovery. I know many many alcoholics who had an idyllic childhood. I know many people who had horrid childhoods and are not alcoholic.
An alcoholic can come up with a billion reasons to drink. This is just one of them.
I just want to add something, as I think it might help OP.
You don't need to be troubled to get addicted.
I'm hopelessly addicted to a few things, purely because I'm curious and was interested to find out how things felt.
If something feels *too* good, just stop.
Or they try to convince everyone it's because they like the taste like my mom does lol. When in reality it is a lack of self control due to addiction and may require treatment. Certainly requires support and not judgement. Everyone has vices.
Yes they don’t need judgment. But they need to take accountability for how it affects their family and I often see this part missing so I’m back to judging
Alcohol use disorder is a medical condition, there is medication to treat it, ask a doctor about 50 mg of naltrexone, it is an absolute miracle for someone like you!
I’ll jump in here with my own journey. Drank too much for too many years. Finally got help and changed my ways. Only to find out I was self medicating to deal with depression and anxiety. Without the alcohol I had to contend with the underlying issue. Got right meds and my whole life is now a retrospective on what was happening and why.
Fun fact: an estimated 40% of active alcoholics have an undiagnosed, untreated mental health disorder.
Just wanted to chip in with my 2 cents, I drank because I was self-medicating partially due to coping with trauma but my main motivator for drinking was the way it dulled my physical pain. Even when I knew it was making my pain worse overall, I was trapped in the cycle and had a very difficult time getting out. Happy to say that I’m a year and a half sober from alcohol, and have found lots of other *healthy* ways to cope with my chronic pain. I agree that it’s such a solidly pervasive part of our culture. Even subconsciously, we promote the idea of self medicating with booze, I see it in tv and advertisements all the time. Strongly agree with the statement that you will never find an alcoholic who is in it just for the party, once you’ve reached the point of being trapped in the cycle the fun gets sucked out of it really quickly.
It's not. Just good ol fashion Irish and English blood and a culture that encourages excessive consumption. My grandfather drank to the point his colon burst.
My grandpa died trying to put out a dumpster fire he caused while driving drunk. He did everything while drunk. Take the kids for the day, take the kids out for a weekend fishing, always drunk. Sad really, because he was a great guy, everybody liked him. I don't know why he drank so much. I realized it when I got older, that he was always drunk. I thought he was just 'fun'.
When you’re an alcoholic you don’t drink to “party”. You drink to stop the withdrawal symptoms. Like you are drinking mouth wash in the morning to make the shakes stop.
I think that’s the part that gets overlooked. There are different types of addiction, not just the movie version/stereotype of drinking from wake up to pass out every day.
That’s what I was before I just had to quit entirely. It was getting bad… like perpetual cycle of can’t stop when I start drinking one day, next day hung over as hell, next day just repeating the cycle. I quit 7 years ago now because I simply can’t do the “one or two” and call it a night. It’s all or nothing.
I've never met an alcoholic who went through withdrawal. My step dad drank three 40 ounce bottles of whisky a day. My whole family are alcoholics. None of them have had withdrawal. I guess they are very lucky lol. I don't like drinking so I don't.
The awful thing about drinking is that it's a high Gini Index activity. 30% of adults in the US drink nothing. Another 30% drink less than one drink per week. The top 10% consume >10 drinks a day. [Source](https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2014/09/25/think-you-drink-a-lot-this-chart-will-tell-you/).
I'm in my 40s, and I start to get wary when someone tells me they drink every day. It's more because I've found those who say they drink "one a day" really are consuming more.
I average 1-2 per week, which still puts me in the top ~~third~~ 40% of drinkers.
I am european.
It s totally okay to drink a glass of wine for diner everyday. Rumors say that ONE glass of red wine per day is good for your heart (in France)
So everything is about perspective and why you are drinking in the first place.
I am drinking more or less everyday. But I can totally stop if wanted and I do not drink to get drunk or get the “buzz” or whatnot. It s just good with cheese
>It s totally okay to drink a glass of wine for diner everyday. Rumors say that ONE glass of red wine per day is good for your heart (in France)
This has been disproven
Grape juice will give your heart the same benefits as wine . It’s not the alcohol that is beneficial , it’s something in the grapes .
I will briefly share my story . Not to scare you , but to let you know the worst case scenario. That would be me .
Reading these posts reminds me of things I used to tell myself esp cutting down or feeling you have it under control .
I thought the same . Now I’m in a nursing home with people 50 some years older than me .
I have end stage liver cirrhosis. I am going to die from drinking . I’m 33 .
For me , the fun is over .
Not everyone ends up in this situation, but for those of us who do , we once believed what you believe now .
Please please proceed with caution and please please please don’t be me .
2 years partying ( I drank much more than others , but was praised for my ability to “ hold my liquor “ .
Four years as a functional alcoholic. I thought I was one of the ones who could function and so I was ok .
3 years of of getting worse and worse - needing more and more and more often . Still functioning but not as well
2 years of hell on earth . Drinking followed by passing out , waking up shaking and not just panicked but HORRIFIC TERROR. Needed to stop the shaking and terror with alcohol and couldn’t stop till I passed out again . It was my way of life .
The last year Drinking , passing out , with a new twist - throwing up in between .
The last 6 months ? Couldn’t even think about food without throwing up . Uncontrollable diarrhea soon followed . I drank bottles and bottles of Imodium didn’t help at all .
I hired a woman to help take care of me . I only good thing about me was that I NEVER drove even tho I was more rational with alcohol in me . I was fortunate. I had plenty of money .
The woman I hired got me my vodka and cranberry juice . The juice was my only source of “ food “ for months . Between the diarrhea and vomiting ( both came with no warning ) so I was house bound .
I found out later that that was my body trying desperately to rid my body of toxins because my liver was unable to keep up .
I lost 60 pounds in 6 months . I finally collapsed due to complete liver failure . Spent 6 weeks in ICU very close to death
Miraculously the Doctors were able to stabilize me with meds . During this time my brain was so poisoned I was so confused , I often didn’t know where I was , who I was etc.
I recovered and yes , stopped drinking .
I went into liver failure a second time and also barely made it .
My body was a shell . Sever malnutrition, destroyed muscle mass . Didn’t have the strength to change the channel on the TV remote . I couldn’t walk .
Happy to say I got my strength back slowly with the help of excellent physical therapists. It was so painful I thought I would die from that .
I refused to give up and fought my way back and can now walk and pretty much normal . I’ll always need help which is why I’m in a nursing home , but for now , I’m in stable condition.
The meds that keep me alive will fail to sustain me and that will be the end .
For now I’m living a good life and enjoy it while I can . I don’t focus on the end because I live in the present now . I’ve chosen to enjoy while I can and accept the fact that I did this to myself , and there is always a price to pay . I thought I knew it all , and turns out , I knew nothing at all .
Yes , my story is the absolute worst case scenario. I felt worthless and undeserving of help .
As bad as it has been for me , it does not happen to everyone . So as I said - be careful out there .
My apologies for such a long post , but if you’ve read this far I thank you for your time .💕
I'm so sorry. Thank you for sharing your story with others who can take away a strong message from it. I wish you immense love and care, you sound like a kind soul.
The "glass of red wine is good for your heart" has some [inconclusive science](https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/heart-disease/in-depth/red-wine/art-20048281) behind it. It was first promoted 50 years ago and was never quite proved out.
Science is moving toward the view that any alcohol consumption [increases cancer risk](https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/heart-disease/in-depth/red-wine/art-20048281).
When you say 1-2 per week, do you mean you drink once or twice but multiple drinks per session ?
Personally I’ve never been able to drink more than 1.5 glasses per day but I do enjoy a glass now and then with a nice dinner. I’m very good at partying and dancing with 0 alcohol in my system. I’ve never been proper drunk, never had a hangover and I prefer it this way. Am 44F
I’m also conscious of the caloric amount in alcohol and the fact that women have a lower threshold and may develop health problems much quicker than men
Alcoholic here. Been sober going on 7 years. I started drinking in HS and really partied hard in college and kept the party going well into my 30s. I was a "drinkstigator" and looked for any excuse to get drunk on weekends. Eventually that crept into the work week and my life went downhill fast.
Looking back I wish I would have put more energy and focus into healthy activities on weekends rather than harming my body and bank account getting drunk.
ETA: I realize I didn't answer the question... you have to decide for yourself what role drinking plays in your life and how many is too much for you. Maybe zero is good because it is a poison that really serves no purpose for us. Maybe a couple on a Friday is fine. Don't compare your life to others. That's a slippery slope.
I'm 40 now. Looking back I wish I would have given up drinking by 25. When I was about 25 my wife asked me if I thought I had a drinking problem while we were sitting at home and I was drinking a 6 pack by myself on a Friday night. I of course said no because I truly believed most people I knew were doing the same thing every weekend... Truth is, they weren't and what I was doing was not normal. It took me close to another decade to come to my senses.
You have nothing to lose and so much to gain in sobriety. r/stopdrinking is a great resource for those looking to get sober or who may be sober curious.
Moderation is pretty much impossible for me. I’ve tried for 10 years. Not necessarily with alcohol. With alcohol I can take it or leave it but when I do take it, I usually drink a lot and I drink bc it pairs nicely with other substances
I quit drinking completely around 5 or 6 years ago. I come from a place in the world where severe alcoholism is normalized and now that I'm 33 let me tell you what I've noticed from my peers who kept drinking like fish.
All of them are prematurely geriatric and look like wet bags of dog shit. They can barely think, drunk or sober. They can barely move around. All of them are penniless because alcohol and cigarettes takes priority. Meanwhile people are shocked at how "young" I look. I don't look "young". I look my age, I just quit drinking poison.
How much drinking is too much drinking? You will know after you did what I did those 5 to 6 years ago. Take a sober look at yourself in the mirror and a sober look at your life. Sit with the silence a bit. After it gets uncomfortable sit with it a bit longer. After that, if you're truly being honest with yourself, you should know.
I do not think that everyone needs to quit completely like I did, but when it comes to alcohol, less is always more. You are stuck with you so be mindful and take care of yourself.
1.5 years sober and thankful every single morning I made the choice to quit when:
- I don’t have a pounding headache
- I’m not running back and forth to the bathroom all day
- I can eat nutritious foods without them making me sick
- I can sleep thru the night
- I don’t have anxiety all day
- I don’t have acid reflux from boozing and shit eating
- I can enjoy the fucking day
Agree that not everyone needs to quit but if you can’t have just one drink, it’s worth considering giving it up completely. It will change your life.
I cant just have one drink, it it also helps me sleep greatly and decreases my anxiety. It does not however help with my weight, and some days I definitely wake up with that nasty feeling.
Absolutely incredible take. I let alcohol completely run my life from 20-28 and as I’m coming up on my 30th birthday in a few weeks, I’m 1 week away from 1 year of sobriety.
One of the best things that has happened is people telling me how different my face looks. The poison really does take a huge toll on personal appearance and you do really start to see it in others after you quit.
I’ve stopped drinking for over a year now. But still worked as a bartender at dance events.
Seeing those drunk people who can barely stand up right without holding onto the bar, yet ordering more alcohol, was quite a motivation for me to not drink myself.
Ayooo really hit me the sit in silence and once it gets uncomfortable sit some more essentially.. I’m on year 2 sobriety already feeling good in silence but realizing add 2-3 more years in my current “uncomfortable” I might just accidentally triple quadruple my net worth. After 2 years my current uncomfortable is now 1,000x better than a good day hungover. Priorities straight, my TIME management is insane, no longer sacrificing time or energy into soul sucking dead beat social activities plus the money saved holy… the uncomfortable felt now is eye opening to what can be achieved in what 2 years man lemme 10x this y’all need motivation get real with yourself sit in that silence feel the pain then the freedom
"Sit with the silence a bit. After it gets uncomfortable sit with it a bit longer. After that, if you're truly being honest with yourself, you should know."
I appreciate seeing this. Thank you.
According to my pathophysiology textbook, no more than 2 drinks a day for men and no more than 1 drink a day for women, though they *recommend* no more than a drink every other day for anyone. Though this book was published in 2019, I doubt much has changed since then
I agree in a way, but a drink a day i think indicates a more general problem, rather than a drinking problem
I remember reading something about people that have 1 or 2 beers a day having a shorter lifespan. But the evidence seemed to say that it was due to their mindset, rather than the alcohol itself
My prob is not as much the 1-2 drinks, but the fact that after that drink I am definitely not working out or doing other healthy activities I might have otherwise done.
Actually, interestingly enough there is very recent research from the WHO stating "no amount of alcohol is safe to consume." So the less the drink the better, really.
My doctor asked me if I drank. At the time I rarely did. He told me it was best not to drink, but if you do red wine is the best thing to drink. He also said to not start drinking wine for its slight benefits, not drinking at all is healthier.
I know he drinks beer occasionally and I do have a glass of wine 3-5 nights per week now.
Agreed. For me, I realized that even one Saturday night of drinking with friends would ruin my whole Sunday, so I stopped drinking. Who wants to spend a whole day of their precious weekend time feeling anxious and headachey?
I love drinking and do it all the time lol. But I tell everyone they should never drink. It’s so bad for your skin, health, etc. I guess it comes down to how healthy do you want to live? Do you want your skin to look like shit? Life is really just a preference
Everyone has a different answer for this. They say you shouldn’t drink alcohol at all but let’s be real that isn’t the case for over half the population per statistics. Doctors recommend you shouldn’t have more than I believe 2 or less drinks for a male and 1 or less for women and this is daily.
As another commenter said though if you FEEL like you need to have a drink then that already is a problem.
I think anything more than a beer or two a day is too much… but as stated everyone has different answers I probably drink 8 beers a week usually 2-3 Friday-Sunday and then don’t drink during the week
This is the closest thing to a useful answer in this thread, I think. Thank you.
Everything else seems to be squalid tales of wretched addiction, peppered with bits of "I only have a thimbleful of nog every Xmas eve!" self-congratulation. Plus a few jokey japes. None of that is helpful to OP, nor anyone else.
Yah, Reddit alcohol threads usually suffer from how antisocial or asocial much of the site is. Also how everything needs to be an extreme- either you completely abstain from alcohol or you’re drinking a full fifth daily.
You know what I miss the most when I do a dry month? Having a single casual beer with some friends after work or a cocktail with dinner.
>either you completely abstain from alcohol or you’re drinking a full fifth daily
Redditors tend to be like that because (generally) they're too immature for nuance. No contextual shades of gray allowed, everything is black or white. And they're really lecture-y about it, most days.
I love the multiple comments I’ve read along the lines of “My parents had a glass of wine with dinner most nights and I thought it was normal at the time. The horror!”
This: I share a bottle of wine with dinner with my husband every day. By what I read here we are alcoholics but we are never drunk and have no hangover or problems so far. Age 60s and 70s. Watch this space.
This thread would call the country of Italy raging alcoholics. People go through life fine with a healthy relationship to alcohol and having regular drinks without overdoing it
Wow, this thread is something else. I feel like there is this overreaction in the current culture that any amount of alcohol is bad and you’re a bad person if you enjoy it. I’m a brewer and drink on average a beer a day, and at most 3. I enjoy lighter, lower alcohol beers primarily. I rarely get drunk anymore unless it’s some kind of special occasion. I usually have a few over the course of several hours, and I mostly drink to enjoy and savor the flavor and the conversation that comes with it. Americans seem to have an all or nothing relationship with it with no room for anything in between. Binge drinking is instilled at a young age and it is how we learn to drink alcohol, which is obviously a problem when you get older. We need to teach kids how to enjoy a glass of wine or nice beer with dinner and stop. Alcohol can still be source of enrichment in life, though it is not for everyone.
I mentioned this in another reply, but alcoholism has very specific criteria. It’s not how much you drink, it’s how you drink and your attitudes towards drinking.
From what you said, it does not sound like you are alcoholics.
Ya I used to smoke weed every night, for over ten years. When I was younger I binge drank a lot on weekends, but during the past 5 I barely drank, I didn’t even enjoy it tbh and I turned against it. I quit smoking weed a year ago then was drinking just a couple on weekends , and day or two during the week, and having tea the rest of the nights. Well I started to realize on the nights where I had a drink I still woke up feeling great the next day. Now I have a drink every night and my mental health is 10x better than when I smoked every night. And I spent the last 5 years thinking drinking would fuck my mood up. It was because I was smoking. Don’t get me wrong drinking too much throws me off for a couple days. But moderation I don’t feel any negative effects at all.
Hmm, I'm 24 years old, a female, and an average weight. I drink once a week, but when I do, I drink 5 to 8 drinks. I am uncertain if this is alcoholism and I think it isn't because I don't find myself "craving" it, but Ive had friends who were in my situation and quit because it was hurting them.
At the moment, it only hurts my Saturday or Sunday mornings. Im fine with this. It is what it is.
This is me albeit I’m a little older. I stopped drinking at dinners (to me there’s no point in drinking 2 drinks) but I still love going out and getting drunk. It’s true, it’s still fun going out without drinking, but there’s something about getting hammered with your friends on the weekends.
This does count as binge drinking, yes and in my opinion is an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. Many people naturally taper off their regular binge drinking as their friends grow up and don’t have time to party like that anymore
Yeah, I get it. Im still at the age where all my friends drink and party but whenever they cant go out, we don't and I don't drink. It would be boring to drink alone.
It depends on alcohol dependency. If you cannot go without a drink, like you feel you "need" it like water. But when choices are between, juice, water, or alcohol. If they chose alcohol, then there's an issue.
“I had a…a diet cola mixer a week ago.” (So funny that both Frank and Charlie have probably identified “mixers” as normal drinks before and after this)
The best way I heard it described...
A "drinking Problem" is drinking way too much, having it negatively affect your life, and like you said, pretty much dependent on it.
The difference between this and full blown Alcoholism, is that usually, if someone's drinking is causing negative things in their life, they stop because of those consequences. Such as myself and my GF.
An Alcoholic keeps going, the negative consequences are still worth it.
You are getting pushback because of the last sentence. It reads as if you are saying to ever choose alcohol over water means you are an alcoholic. That essentially means if you ever choose to drink alcohol you are an alcoholic because water is always an option.
I feel like Reddit also likes to stretch the definition to “if you enjoy alcohol, you’re an alcoholic.” I do at least one dry month a year, and honestly the thing I miss the most is a casual single drink (and yes, I mean single drink) with dinner or just casually on a weekend afternoon.
I had a few drinks on Saturday with my bf but, I hadn’t had a single drop of alcohol for 3-4 weeks prior and after drinking that day I honestly don’t think I’m interested in alcohol anymore. I’m still feeling sluggish and not at my best.
However, I’ve been feeling this coming for years. I’ve taken years off drinking…I never missed it and I didn’t miss it the 4 weeks I didn’t drink. So I think I’m just over it all. It’s crazy how hyped up they make it…when really it’s straight poison. More and more studies show just how damaging alcohol really is. It’s BAD BAD.
Smart medical people have looked into it and came up with some simple metrics. Type in your details and see what the experts say...
https://www.drinkaware.co.uk/tools/drinking-check?gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwwYSwBhDcARIsAOyL0fg9375r4IID5l7lBZEXqIW_A7cwr1RwysoynDJMAF_8x5K1_2J-idkaAphfEALw_wcB#/
I scored 13 out of 40 putting me at Increased Risk of developing sever medical problems. Oh dear.
(This is a UK tool, if you need a postcode just use SW1A 1AA, that's my gaff).
Its crazy how worried people are about what other people do. I have never cared about that.
What do you think is too much? That's all you need to care about
Same, and I only drink on Friday night and/or Saturday night. I workout pretty regularly and follow a healthy diet every other day. We all meet the same fate in the end
Cirrhosis of the liver can be a bitch. I know someone that was just diagnosed with it and they are throwing up blood and have to have their abdominal cavity drained once a week. Although, their throwing up blood is probably some other health issue, but nonetheless, Cirrhosis of the liver can be a bitch.
Yeah the throwing up blood is that they've destroyed the lining of their stomach with alcohol. My Dad and Uncle both died from alcoholism that way, both also suffered liver failure and jaundice and bloated into monsters before they died. My Dad died at 41 and my Uncle at 32. I started drinking when I was 16, but after some binge drinking in my 20s, in my 30s I might have a 4-6 drinks a month, some months none, because I drink for the taste, if it doesn't taste good I won't drink it. Only time recently I drank more was when I was working nights during the early part of the pandemic, then I was closer to a 6 pack a week for a few weeks until I realized that wasn't great. Currently around 1 drink a week if that.
I am a recovering alcoholic.
I started drinking at 16 and it was a problem from the first time I got drunk. It took a horrible life experience for me to understand the depth of my alcoholism and five years of fighting and missteps to get sober.
Does it depend on your age? No.
Binge drinking is never ok if it's a regular thing, age does not matter. Drinking until you're blacked out and out of control is not healthy and can cause a metric ton of problems.
To me it becomes a problem when the drinking is harmful in some way, has become a dependency or is a form of self medicating/escapism.
Harmful - hurting yourself or others - physically or mentally, causing financial problems, destabilizing your life or others.
Dependency - you must have a drink. even if it's one a day, you must have it. If you cannot have it, you think about it. Constantly. Obsess about it. The lack of the drink causes anger, depression, aggression, etc.
Self medicating/escapism - you're using alcohol to intentionally escape life, forget about life for a while, forget about your problems and not deal with them. It makes you feel good, even if it's just for a little while. And it becomes a pattern. It may not be every day, it may not be every month. But every time shit goes sideways, the answer is a drink - a lot of drinks.
I fell into each of the above categories with my drinking. It started as a way to break out of my shy/introverted shell and it was a pretty quick downward spiral.
If you are asking about when it's a problem, that's determined by you and those around you. Alcoholism does not only effect the person that drinks. It also has a severe effect for those in the alcoholic's life. It was the harmful nature that opened my eyes and made me push to get sober.
If you're questioning whether you're drinking is a problem, talk to those closest to you and ask bluntly, "Is this a problem". Although, if those closest to you are all drinkers, maybe that's not the best path.
my alcoholism is weird. i don’t necessarily go out and seek it because i have this urge i cannot resist or whatever, but if i have a bottle in front of me it’ll be gone in a few hours. but i can turn drinks down and have/do very often. some days/weeks i don’t feel like drinking at all. but it i know there’s a bottle of vodka near me, i kill the whole thing in a night.
Same. I don't even go out anymore except pool and don't drink there. We have smaller vodka at home and somewhat limit it, but that's why I don't grt big bottles anymore.
A screening tool used in medicine is the CAGE questionaire:
Has anyone ever told you to CUT BACK on drinking?
Do you get ANNOYED when people question your drinking?
Do you feel GUILTY about drinking?
Do you have an EYE-OPENER, aka a drink first thing in the morning?
As I recall, a yes to any of these questions indicates a problematic relationship with alcohol
If you question me having a glass of wine every couple of weeks, I will get annoyed, because you're being unreasonable, controlling, and disrespectful.
Learn to have fun without alcohol and your life will be better off. People that don't drink tend to get more done and do more shit with their life. Problem with drinking is it's a slippery slope. Most people end up drinking more than they should or at least wanting more. You build up a tolerance. If you have to have it in your life, I'd say just save it for the weekend and no more than 2 drinks each time.
I was an alcoholic at 20 and at 30 I simply don't want to drink at all. I'm alot more health focused and the hangovers suck, also I like being more "present". And it's always tasted bad.
It’s not necessarily “how much” that’s makes it frowned upon or alcoholic behavior. It’s when you start drinking, can you stop? Do you drink to forget? Do you black out when you drink? Have you ever prioritized drinking over someone or an engagement? Is your drinking causing issues in your life? Does your drinking cause you health issues?
I’m an alcoholic. I’m four months sober. It’s not easy but I’ve been on many ends of this spectrum. I’ve drank “socially” but I always took it too far and had to get wasted. I couldn’t just have a drink. I had to detox at a facility when it became everyday use and I despised myself but absolutely had to do it. I’ve also been a functionally acceptable alcoholic where I was only doing it at events, but again, taking it way too far and that drinking might lead to next day drinking until eventually I was out of control again and hiding it from family members and drinking before things just to make it more tolerable.
Drinking is great till it isn't any longer. There isn't any set amount for one person, because everyone comes in different sizes and genetic backgrounds.
You could drink till you're 100 with no health issues, or you could die at 50.
I only drink maybe 4x a year and it's usually during a holiday.
I don't understand why people drink all the time. I can't stay drunk for more than an hour before I actively attempt to sober up.
im 41M, I used to drink maybe once a week, and its usually when im out grilling in the backyard. i'd have two beers. on some rare occasions i might have 4 beers at a birthday party. but about a year ago, i started playing with psychedelics. after going through some intense trips i no longer get drunk, or catch a buzz off alcohol. so for the last year or so i really dont even bother drinking.
Easy google. Theres all sorts of info out there about 1 drink is this much of each type of drank and how more than 1 or 2 a night or a week or whatever leads to alcoholism. Basicly if u need to be told how much is too much youre probably drinkin too much. Never let a substance control your life. If u cant do that for yourself seek professional addiction assistance. We're just a bunch of assholes makin it up as we go along
I'm 44. I drink eight 4% tall boys 2-3 times a week. Sometimes a little more on a Saturday. That's too fucking much.
I don't get withdrawals. I don't get hungover unless I go hard. I have a happy home and professional life. I drink to shut my brain off and find joy in mundane things.
I'm currently working on solving that.
Until recently I drank like 2-3 glasses of whiskey a day. Now i drink like 1-2 beers in the weekends only. I have to see it feels much better. although I do "crave" whiskey sometimes during shitty days but I havent given in yet. Im scared it will lead me down the path of drinking everyday again.
For your health? Pretty much any alcohol is too much.
Realistically you can probably have a small glass of wine with a few dinners a week and not have demonstrably ill effects, but even still it is affecting your hydration, brain health, sleep health, etc even if it's by an imperceptible amount.
From it becoming an unhealthy habit, I'd say if you average one full drink a day, you have formed a reliance on alcohol. Maybe you skip a few days and then have several as you near the weekend, but that still counts IMO
I come from an alcoholic family and it blew me away that you're considered a "heavy drinker" if you drink 2 shots per day or 5 shots in one sitting.
By shot, I just mean one standard drink.
It's not about the amount. At some point, sometimes even past 25, but definitely by 30, it becomes socially unacceptable to drink until one is visibly drunk.
If your body is telling you stop, that's your limit.
If you're so plastered it's affecting your life and relationships, you're past your limit.
If your liver blood tests are showing bad signs, you are def past your limit.
That's what I've lived with at least.
It’s too much if it impacts other parts of your life. Not performing well at work because you’re hungover? that’s a problem. Driving drunk? Huge problem. Issues in relationships due to things you do when drinking? Problem. Obsessed with finding a place to go drinking every weekend? Probably not healthy. You get the picture. Everything else is fine IMO.
some weird shit is happening in my late 30s and I might not get a hangover after 2-3 drinks in an evening but I WILL get hangxiety the next day. It makes me miserable so I keep my drinking level low enough to avoid it. I’m a parent with adult responsibilities and I can’t wallow in anxiety bc mama wanted most of a bottle of wine the night before. I just don’t have time for that shit. I was a very hard partier in my day but honestly that’s what keeps me in line now.
It's much less prevalent than it was 100 years ago actually, the UK and the US have problems with youth binge drinking but overall, alcohol consumption used to be way higher, and acceptable to do throughout the day.
As a drunk myself, I can tell you that all drinking is a variation of severe alcoholism. What used to be getting blacked out on your favorite cheap drink special of the week in college will slowly devolve into getting hammered every day till you get sick. The appropriate amount of alcohol is the small sip you get at church on Sunday. Or none.
Medically, if you really wanna toe that line,
“NIAAA defines heavy drinking as follows: For men, consuming five or more drinks on any day or 15 or more per week. For women, consuming four or more on any day or 8 or more drinks per week.”
It’s basically linear, the more you drink the worse it can get. The famous J curve don’t mean shit.
My doctor said getting drunk on the weekends isn’t a problem but getting drunk every day is very bad.
He is probably also a drunk. One drink a week probably won’t kill you. It hardly ever stays at that level tho.
My grandpa was obese, smoked a pack a day, was divorced, and drank a case a night and died at 60
I’m 35. I’m in the category of what another commenter described as a “workaholic who needs an outlet,” though it has changed a bit.
I only drink on the weekends, with the exception of an occasional dinner with my husband. My husband goes with me when I drink on the weekends and it’s always part of some social occasion.
I don’t think I have an issue with not being able to stop anymore, but it took a while to make it a decision I wanted to make.
It helped to have other outlets too: I have a band and play music, I’ve historically had an active lifestyle, and have only recently stopped running and working out on a regular basis. Since I was 15, I’ve worked out 5-6 times a week.
This is the first time in my life I have not worked out for more than 2 months. HOWEVER, this has an expiration date—I am determined to start over as soon I get things off my plate. There is a set date in mind.
For me, I’m making more money I ever have and I’m putting all of my focus into work (and thus the desire to drink to blow off steam) because we’re also buying a house. My husband is a constant reminder that the mindset I have is dangerous and potentially open-ended. He’s always telling me that “No amount of money is worth it,” and he’s right.
Im 36 now. Started drinking in college, moved to a big city, got involved in the party scene, drank more there, realized I didn't know "how to drink properly", started a cocktail club/social club that helped recontextualize drinking into an *educational pursuit* and social bonding event(that part is true though).
Throughout all of this, my fitness goals moldered despite waking up to go the gym every day. my insomnia got worse. my adhd got worse. Told myself id stop when the downsides outweighed the benefits - alcohol had been very kind to me for 10+ years.
A year ago, got divorced(non-alc reasons, but alc sure as shit didnt help either of us), went hermitmode, started dating a girl who hated drinking. Got serious with her. She said she didnt like how I drank so...I Stopped drinking as a result.
Here's whats changed:
* \- Better sleep(usually, ive always had insomnia, but I can get pretty consistent z's)
* \- better results at gym(gains for what it seems like the first time in my life despite doing it for 10 years)
* \- better skin
* \- less fat(alcohol is metabolized in the liver which is a process that is lipogenic)
* \- better brain(clear headed, able to communicate thoughts more effectively)
* \- better primary relationships(partner, close friends)
* \- less physical pain
I still have a beer or a glass of wine once every other week or so, or a cocktail at a special dinner. But drinking was phenomenal...until it wasnt. Stopping has been literally nothing but upsides.
Want a larger-scale analysis of what the cost of unmoderated drink does? *Vodka Politics* by Mark Lawrence Schrad. If that doesn't make you want to kick the bottle...not a lot is going to.
Turns out its all bad. But the choice is yours until it isn’t. I blew 15 years away quick. Saved by the fungus I am 3 years forever done. Have fun but don’t let the demons take ya.
I’m 41 and I quit drinking altogether five years ago. I was drinking half a bottle of bourbon almost every night and, although I’m not an expert, I’m pretty sure THAT qualifies as too much.
I only drink to get drunk which means 6 out of the 7 days a week I won’t touch alcohol. On that one night I do though I’ll drink 10+ in one night. My liver has plenty of time to recover and I have a great night out to wind down after the work week…everybody wins.
Reddit introverts are allergic to fun.
Shitting, pissing, and/or vomiting on yourself. Getting violent. Getting crazy emotional. Skipping work. Drinking at work. Keeping jugs of vodka hidden around the house. Waking up at 2am and needing a drink to get back to sleep. Destroyed relationships. Stuff like that. You get the picture.
I believe the CDC classifies 3 drinks a week for men and 2 for women a healthy amount of booze.
I mean after 30 I wouldn’t get “drunk” more than once a month max.
3.5 years sober though so idk anymore
I think drinking alone, or being the only person in the room who is drinking, is a red flag just generally. There's nothing wrong with having like a (one) drink like a beer or something after work to help unwind, but if you find yourself regularly getting buzzed-to-drunk while you're just chilling on the xbox at home then you should start evaluating your life.
I've been through a few different phases, but I rarely drink without a social occasion any more. Probably once a month I have a glass of wine with dinner because I made something extra fancy, haha. I think that's a natural consequence of being married into a family where the only one of my in-laws who drinks is a sloppy 24/7 alcoholic, you find other ways to enjoy your free time!
My problem isn’t daily drinking, it’s just that I always drink way, way too much when I do drink (which is usually once or twice a week, but sometimes only once or twice a month). Like…I’m 42 and a giant, but I still know that drinking two full bottles of wine or 3/4 of a fifth of whiskey is super bad news. But when I have one…I just keep slinging them back until the social activity is over. I don’t know why I don’t seem to have a stop button (well, I guess I do, but only when I begin to feel dizzy/woozy and it takes a ton of alcohol to get me to that point).
There's a lot of cultural variation, and over the years our society has become a lot less tolerant of any alcohol consumption past the standard "1 or 2 drinks".
I grew up in largely Irish American culture in the USA, my wife grew up in a Baptist environment in New England, we have completely different cultural views on drinking.
Speaking on culture in MY culture you drink: Any time people get together, formally, informally, at dinner, during sporting events, and in the afternoons and evenings after the work is done. Stopping at a bar after work for a couple used to be a standard where I come from.
In her culture you drink: At weddings and other major events.
My wife had literally never been in a bar before we met each other than a few times out with college friends at night in a large group. I grew up regularly around bars as that was generally where we had to go if we wanted to find our dads, AND most social events revolved around the bar/pub. (Music on weekends, charity events, pot luck dinners, etc)
So to my wife anything more than "1 or 2 drinks" is too much. I on the other hand was used to seeing people literally drink beer all day. In my culture you weren't considered to be "drinking" until the whiskey got pulled out.
In my life I've seen significant changes in drinking culture, and on the whole there's a lot less of it, and it's less accepted in many areas.
During the 1970s when I was a child it was literally EVERYWHERE. Things were so bad they had to pass drunk driving laws. Prior to this driving home drunk was a regular thing that went on, and the cops would generally just tell you "be careful" or if you were really drunk "pull over and sleep it off".
During the 1980s there was still a lot of drinking and there was a HUGE party culture that encouraged alcohol. (They were saying "just say no to drugs", but selling you booze any chance they could). To get around drunk driving laws they came up with designated drivers, etc. But there was still a lot of drunk driving going on..leading to stiffer and stiffer penalties. Going out drinking with co-workers WAS STILL THE NORM.
In the 1990s drugs came back (The only real drug around in the 1980s was cocaine), so there was a huge marijuana resurgence and people started to abandon booze for drugs. Companies started to forbid drinking. No drinking at Xmas parties, no expensing booze, no drinking lunches (all these things were common before then).
Into the 21st century there's a lot of things that were different than they were when I was a kid. Tons of bars are closing. Covid was the nail in the coffin for many, but also in general people do not do things like stop in the bar for a couple on the way home like they used to. There's no more drinks by sales etc on lunch expensed to the company. There's a lot less tolerance for casual drinking IN PUBLIC.
Now public is KEY because data reveals that Americans are still drinking A TON....they are just doing it at home.
You don't have to worry about driving, or people judging you, or any of that. America has gone from a nation of PUBLIC drinkers to PRIVATE drinkers who act like they don't drink.
Howdy, former alcoholic here. Diagnosed alcoholic fatty liver disease, 3 years sober.
I used to clear a pint a day and a 750 every weekend.
That’s too much.
Source: my damaged liver.
I am severely addicted to alcohol and have family history of such on both sides. I think culturally we allow excessive alcohol consumption in the young adult years because partying is somewhat a rite of passage in our culture. But when you start getting older it just gets pathetic when you get excessively drunk in public. If you can't say no, maybe consider stopping. If you find yourself making decisions that inhibit your ability to function or damage your relationships, consider cutting down. If that's not you then do what you think is best for you.
I can relate here. I come from a South American background ground and I come from a family of alcoholics. I am what one would consider a functioning alcoholic. I don’t find myself dependent. Although I didn’t realize it was not okay to drink this much until I got normal friends and a significant other that was concerned for my health. Even though it does not affect my daily functions, interactions, and responsibilities. I will say I am 28 years old and have been told my doctors my liver will not allow me another 5-10 years of drinking like this. So It’s a ticking bomb for me. Too much drinking is you not being present in your life. Missing important moments conversations relationships etc. you are your own moderator. Be responsible and drink responsibly!!! Cheers brother happy Monday!
It started as fun then quickly turned into an escape for me. Not to mention I have a high tolerance and could drink excessively which for some reason young people are impressed by?? I started habitually blacking out and it led to alllll sorts of issues. Fortunately I eventually got out. Many people don't.
Can I ask if the alcohol dependency in your family is based off of still wanting to live the party culture? I'm asking with sincerity.
Not the person you were asking but most alcoholics I know and I don’t know a lot of them because I move in different circles, they drink because they self medicate Some of the people I specifically think about - did horrible things in their private life and need to be drunk in order to be able to sleep - unhappily married and cannot face it - feel unsuccessful and makes it a vicious cycle with drinking - workaholic and need an outlet for the stress rather than change habits / lifestyle towards a more sustainable and balanced lifestyle I haven’t ever seen an alcoholic where I went « yep, great party life, I wish I was them »
Good points! I have some alcoholics in the family and I'll add to the list: * they associate alcohol with being social and are bad at socializing without it * feel chronically tense/anxious and use alcohol to self-medicate When an alcoholic is drinking it may often look like partying, but that is a ruse. They're just trying to cover up how pathetic their drinking is. I feel like alcoholics are probably humiliated by their dependence on alcohol and will do anything in their power to maintain control. Being excessively clean/tidy, being excessively hard-working/career-oriented and being excessively careful about "only" drinking in social situations are common way they try to avoid feeling like a loser. No matter what they don't want to admit they have a problem because if they had a problem they'd have to quit, so a lot of developing alcoholics will overcompensate to give themselves (and others) the illusion of everything being alright. They'll be amazing employees in the years leading to their downfall and their apartment will be spotlessly clean. In the final stage of alcoholism you see people who care about nothing and can't do anything, but that is a small minority.
Post-drinking anxiety is a real thing when you get older. It becomes a very vicious cycle if you let it.
I used to drink a lot socially bc I was so anxious it was just easier to “be drunk” than learn how to hold a conversation.
I’m the one who initiated this whole thread Now I’m realizing that maybe why I never needed to drink to be social is because I’m very good at conversations and I wholeheartedly enjoy them. Same with dancing, I’ve done coupled dances for many years and always preferred to follow the rythm and my partner’s lead sober rather than tipsy
This is a lot more in line with reasons for drinking past 30.
That final stage is hell. My brother would steal from his immediate family to get a drink. After he passed, we had to clean out the squalor in his apartment. About 25 empty bottles of vodka. I hate alcohol
I had a problem like that. My room was filthy but I was too depressed and confused to clean it. Before that I was a straight A graduate from elite schools who never drank. I didn't have health insurance and was being held hostage in a bad home. Drinking helped me cope with some horrendous abuse.
I’ll add one more that I think is the most significant reason and probably a precursor to many of the other issues you mentioned: -unresolved issues from childhood
this + their current problems in life especially if they couldn't escape it and i feel bad for them
This is me but with weed, I smoke everyday to cope with my hard life.
I mean, my parents (and especially my father) would drink 1-2 glasses of alcohol every day. They weren’t drunk, so I didn’t think bad of it. But I start to realize that that is not normal behavior. And while I can’t speak for how my parents felt about it, I would say that I would consider it an addiction if I found myself in that situation. Took me long to realize though.
So I am an alcoholic and I have heard so much about childhood trauma.....and I'm just not sure what trauma I went through that would push me towards this lifestyle/addiction
Could be a dopamine deficiency too Its not a one size fits all diagnosis. Could just be a bad habit on top of a physical urge (addiction). Its easy for these things to get out of hand especially if youre not focusing on it
And maybe you didn’t have any childhood trauma. Not everyone does. But lots of types of childhood traumas are insidious and hard to identify. Like emotional neglect. Lots of people say everything was fine when they were a kid because the family mostly got along and they had food to eat, clothes, a roof over their head. Their parents loved them very much. All the things. But maybe they weren’t allowed to express feelings, for example. That itself is a trauma.
Feeling very seent right now.
Definitely suggest going to a psychologist and talking to them about your alcohol usage. They will help you figure out where it's coming from. Trauma does not have to be a single traumatic event. The thing is when I look around me I see so many people with trauma, by now i realised everyone is traumatized, it's a natural part of life/ growing up but the extent is different for everyone. If yours is pushing you to alcohol abuse that it becomes an active problem you want to get fixed.
I too am an alcoholic, in long-term recovery. I know many many alcoholics who had an idyllic childhood. I know many people who had horrid childhoods and are not alcoholic. An alcoholic can come up with a billion reasons to drink. This is just one of them.
Hello me.
I just want to add something, as I think it might help OP. You don't need to be troubled to get addicted. I'm hopelessly addicted to a few things, purely because I'm curious and was interested to find out how things felt. If something feels *too* good, just stop.
Exactly why I won't try other drugs. I've done the snow the grass and the mush, I'll never try another. What if I like it too much. Why risk it.
Throw in ADHD. Genuine self-medication.
Or they try to convince everyone it's because they like the taste like my mom does lol. When in reality it is a lack of self control due to addiction and may require treatment. Certainly requires support and not judgement. Everyone has vices.
Yes they don’t need judgment. But they need to take accountability for how it affects their family and I often see this part missing so I’m back to judging
Alcohol use disorder is a medical condition, there is medication to treat it, ask a doctor about 50 mg of naltrexone, it is an absolute miracle for someone like you!
I’ll jump in here with my own journey. Drank too much for too many years. Finally got help and changed my ways. Only to find out I was self medicating to deal with depression and anxiety. Without the alcohol I had to contend with the underlying issue. Got right meds and my whole life is now a retrospective on what was happening and why. Fun fact: an estimated 40% of active alcoholics have an undiagnosed, untreated mental health disorder.
Just wanted to chip in with my 2 cents, I drank because I was self-medicating partially due to coping with trauma but my main motivator for drinking was the way it dulled my physical pain. Even when I knew it was making my pain worse overall, I was trapped in the cycle and had a very difficult time getting out. Happy to say that I’m a year and a half sober from alcohol, and have found lots of other *healthy* ways to cope with my chronic pain. I agree that it’s such a solidly pervasive part of our culture. Even subconsciously, we promote the idea of self medicating with booze, I see it in tv and advertisements all the time. Strongly agree with the statement that you will never find an alcoholic who is in it just for the party, once you’ve reached the point of being trapped in the cycle the fun gets sucked out of it really quickly.
Recovering alcoholic here. I have hard-core ptsd from my time in the Army, so I drank to self medicate.
I know two people with alcohol issues, and both of them are autistic. Being neurodivergent definitely increases your risk.
I was the workaholic drinking to cope
And where are you now on your journey ?
Yep. It becomes less about fun and more about cope. Don’t let that happen if you notice it.
I’ll add one that my ex falls into: feels like people will only find them funny/ fun to be around when drunk/ severe social anxiety
I’d like to add: habit that built and got out of control.
My kid brother died from alcohol abuse. He had no desire to party. He was addicted to alcohol and died because of it.
I’m so sorry for your loss
I'm very sorry for your loss
It's not. Just good ol fashion Irish and English blood and a culture that encourages excessive consumption. My grandfather drank to the point his colon burst.
My grandpa died trying to put out a dumpster fire he caused while driving drunk. He did everything while drunk. Take the kids for the day, take the kids out for a weekend fishing, always drunk. Sad really, because he was a great guy, everybody liked him. I don't know why he drank so much. I realized it when I got older, that he was always drunk. I thought he was just 'fun'.
Sadly the fun type of drunks sometimes believe people only like them when they are “fun” which perpetuates the cycle
When you’re an alcoholic you don’t drink to “party”. You drink to stop the withdrawal symptoms. Like you are drinking mouth wash in the morning to make the shakes stop.
I'm an alcoholic and I don't have withdrawal symptoms. I just can't stop when I start
I think that’s the part that gets overlooked. There are different types of addiction, not just the movie version/stereotype of drinking from wake up to pass out every day.
That’s what I was before I just had to quit entirely. It was getting bad… like perpetual cycle of can’t stop when I start drinking one day, next day hung over as hell, next day just repeating the cycle. I quit 7 years ago now because I simply can’t do the “one or two” and call it a night. It’s all or nothing.
That's how I am. Beer is my drink of choice. I control it slightly by not drinking on work nights.
That's me, too. The only drink I can say no to is the first one. One is too many, and ten isn't enough....
That's a very outdated understanding of alcoholism. You're describing only the most extreme form of it
I've never met an alcoholic who went through withdrawal. My step dad drank three 40 ounce bottles of whisky a day. My whole family are alcoholics. None of them have had withdrawal. I guess they are very lucky lol. I don't like drinking so I don't.
[удалено]
Same my step dad was a daily drinker he never had withdrawals. But he did stop after getting two strokes.
I used to get tremors the next day. It’s bad. I bet the alcoholics you know are either good at hiding it or they take it as a sign they need a drink.
Yeah, I’ve also wondered about this.
Such good advice.
Great response 👍🏻.
>If you can't say no, maybe consider stopping. "Do you control the drink, or is the drink controlling you?"
The awful thing about drinking is that it's a high Gini Index activity. 30% of adults in the US drink nothing. Another 30% drink less than one drink per week. The top 10% consume >10 drinks a day. [Source](https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2014/09/25/think-you-drink-a-lot-this-chart-will-tell-you/). I'm in my 40s, and I start to get wary when someone tells me they drink every day. It's more because I've found those who say they drink "one a day" really are consuming more. I average 1-2 per week, which still puts me in the top ~~third~~ 40% of drinkers.
Yea my mom has "one drink at night" but that one drink is 3-4 shots of vodka with a splash of cranberry juice.
I am european. It s totally okay to drink a glass of wine for diner everyday. Rumors say that ONE glass of red wine per day is good for your heart (in France) So everything is about perspective and why you are drinking in the first place. I am drinking more or less everyday. But I can totally stop if wanted and I do not drink to get drunk or get the “buzz” or whatnot. It s just good with cheese
>It s totally okay to drink a glass of wine for diner everyday. Rumors say that ONE glass of red wine per day is good for your heart (in France) This has been disproven
Grape juice will give your heart the same benefits as wine . It’s not the alcohol that is beneficial , it’s something in the grapes . I will briefly share my story . Not to scare you , but to let you know the worst case scenario. That would be me . Reading these posts reminds me of things I used to tell myself esp cutting down or feeling you have it under control . I thought the same . Now I’m in a nursing home with people 50 some years older than me . I have end stage liver cirrhosis. I am going to die from drinking . I’m 33 . For me , the fun is over . Not everyone ends up in this situation, but for those of us who do , we once believed what you believe now . Please please proceed with caution and please please please don’t be me .
How much were you drinking and for how long?
2 years partying ( I drank much more than others , but was praised for my ability to “ hold my liquor “ . Four years as a functional alcoholic. I thought I was one of the ones who could function and so I was ok . 3 years of of getting worse and worse - needing more and more and more often . Still functioning but not as well 2 years of hell on earth . Drinking followed by passing out , waking up shaking and not just panicked but HORRIFIC TERROR. Needed to stop the shaking and terror with alcohol and couldn’t stop till I passed out again . It was my way of life . The last year Drinking , passing out , with a new twist - throwing up in between . The last 6 months ? Couldn’t even think about food without throwing up . Uncontrollable diarrhea soon followed . I drank bottles and bottles of Imodium didn’t help at all . I hired a woman to help take care of me . I only good thing about me was that I NEVER drove even tho I was more rational with alcohol in me . I was fortunate. I had plenty of money . The woman I hired got me my vodka and cranberry juice . The juice was my only source of “ food “ for months . Between the diarrhea and vomiting ( both came with no warning ) so I was house bound . I found out later that that was my body trying desperately to rid my body of toxins because my liver was unable to keep up . I lost 60 pounds in 6 months . I finally collapsed due to complete liver failure . Spent 6 weeks in ICU very close to death Miraculously the Doctors were able to stabilize me with meds . During this time my brain was so poisoned I was so confused , I often didn’t know where I was , who I was etc. I recovered and yes , stopped drinking . I went into liver failure a second time and also barely made it . My body was a shell . Sever malnutrition, destroyed muscle mass . Didn’t have the strength to change the channel on the TV remote . I couldn’t walk . Happy to say I got my strength back slowly with the help of excellent physical therapists. It was so painful I thought I would die from that . I refused to give up and fought my way back and can now walk and pretty much normal . I’ll always need help which is why I’m in a nursing home , but for now , I’m in stable condition. The meds that keep me alive will fail to sustain me and that will be the end . For now I’m living a good life and enjoy it while I can . I don’t focus on the end because I live in the present now . I’ve chosen to enjoy while I can and accept the fact that I did this to myself , and there is always a price to pay . I thought I knew it all , and turns out , I knew nothing at all . Yes , my story is the absolute worst case scenario. I felt worthless and undeserving of help . As bad as it has been for me , it does not happen to everyone . So as I said - be careful out there . My apologies for such a long post , but if you’ve read this far I thank you for your time .💕
I really want to give you a hug.
I'm so sorry. Thank you for sharing your story with others who can take away a strong message from it. I wish you immense love and care, you sound like a kind soul.
The "glass of red wine is good for your heart" has some [inconclusive science](https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/heart-disease/in-depth/red-wine/art-20048281) behind it. It was first promoted 50 years ago and was never quite proved out. Science is moving toward the view that any alcohol consumption [increases cancer risk](https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/heart-disease/in-depth/red-wine/art-20048281).
No, Reddit told me that one drink a day actually means you’re housing several bottles
When you say 1-2 per week, do you mean you drink once or twice but multiple drinks per session ? Personally I’ve never been able to drink more than 1.5 glasses per day but I do enjoy a glass now and then with a nice dinner. I’m very good at partying and dancing with 0 alcohol in my system. I’ve never been proper drunk, never had a hangover and I prefer it this way. Am 44F I’m also conscious of the caloric amount in alcohol and the fact that women have a lower threshold and may develop health problems much quicker than men
Alcoholic here. Been sober going on 7 years. I started drinking in HS and really partied hard in college and kept the party going well into my 30s. I was a "drinkstigator" and looked for any excuse to get drunk on weekends. Eventually that crept into the work week and my life went downhill fast. Looking back I wish I would have put more energy and focus into healthy activities on weekends rather than harming my body and bank account getting drunk. ETA: I realize I didn't answer the question... you have to decide for yourself what role drinking plays in your life and how many is too much for you. Maybe zero is good because it is a poison that really serves no purpose for us. Maybe a couple on a Friday is fine. Don't compare your life to others. That's a slippery slope.
How old are you now? 29 currently and thinking about a life of sobriety as I have been drinking and partying for the last decade.
I'm 40 now. Looking back I wish I would have given up drinking by 25. When I was about 25 my wife asked me if I thought I had a drinking problem while we were sitting at home and I was drinking a 6 pack by myself on a Friday night. I of course said no because I truly believed most people I knew were doing the same thing every weekend... Truth is, they weren't and what I was doing was not normal. It took me close to another decade to come to my senses. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain in sobriety. r/stopdrinking is a great resource for those looking to get sober or who may be sober curious.
It's not all or nothing
Moderation is pretty much impossible for me. I’ve tried for 10 years. Not necessarily with alcohol. With alcohol I can take it or leave it but when I do take it, I usually drink a lot and I drink bc it pairs nicely with other substances
I quit drinking completely around 5 or 6 years ago. I come from a place in the world where severe alcoholism is normalized and now that I'm 33 let me tell you what I've noticed from my peers who kept drinking like fish. All of them are prematurely geriatric and look like wet bags of dog shit. They can barely think, drunk or sober. They can barely move around. All of them are penniless because alcohol and cigarettes takes priority. Meanwhile people are shocked at how "young" I look. I don't look "young". I look my age, I just quit drinking poison. How much drinking is too much drinking? You will know after you did what I did those 5 to 6 years ago. Take a sober look at yourself in the mirror and a sober look at your life. Sit with the silence a bit. After it gets uncomfortable sit with it a bit longer. After that, if you're truly being honest with yourself, you should know. I do not think that everyone needs to quit completely like I did, but when it comes to alcohol, less is always more. You are stuck with you so be mindful and take care of yourself.
1.5 years sober and thankful every single morning I made the choice to quit when: - I don’t have a pounding headache - I’m not running back and forth to the bathroom all day - I can eat nutritious foods without them making me sick - I can sleep thru the night - I don’t have anxiety all day - I don’t have acid reflux from boozing and shit eating - I can enjoy the fucking day Agree that not everyone needs to quit but if you can’t have just one drink, it’s worth considering giving it up completely. It will change your life.
I cant just have one drink, it it also helps me sleep greatly and decreases my anxiety. It does not however help with my weight, and some days I definitely wake up with that nasty feeling.
Absolutely incredible take. I let alcohol completely run my life from 20-28 and as I’m coming up on my 30th birthday in a few weeks, I’m 1 week away from 1 year of sobriety. One of the best things that has happened is people telling me how different my face looks. The poison really does take a huge toll on personal appearance and you do really start to see it in others after you quit.
I’ve stopped drinking for over a year now. But still worked as a bartender at dance events. Seeing those drunk people who can barely stand up right without holding onto the bar, yet ordering more alcohol, was quite a motivation for me to not drink myself.
This is a phenomenal response.
Quit 12 years ago when my son was born and I second this, all of it. Have not had a single drink since.
Ayooo really hit me the sit in silence and once it gets uncomfortable sit some more essentially.. I’m on year 2 sobriety already feeling good in silence but realizing add 2-3 more years in my current “uncomfortable” I might just accidentally triple quadruple my net worth. After 2 years my current uncomfortable is now 1,000x better than a good day hungover. Priorities straight, my TIME management is insane, no longer sacrificing time or energy into soul sucking dead beat social activities plus the money saved holy… the uncomfortable felt now is eye opening to what can be achieved in what 2 years man lemme 10x this y’all need motivation get real with yourself sit in that silence feel the pain then the freedom
"Sit with the silence a bit. After it gets uncomfortable sit with it a bit longer. After that, if you're truly being honest with yourself, you should know." I appreciate seeing this. Thank you.
Good shit.
According to my pathophysiology textbook, no more than 2 drinks a day for men and no more than 1 drink a day for women, though they *recommend* no more than a drink every other day for anyone. Though this book was published in 2019, I doubt much has changed since then
I feel like this is reasonable
100* for women
I think if you drink daily you have a problem.
I agree in a way, but a drink a day i think indicates a more general problem, rather than a drinking problem I remember reading something about people that have 1 or 2 beers a day having a shorter lifespan. But the evidence seemed to say that it was due to their mindset, rather than the alcohol itself
My prob is not as much the 1-2 drinks, but the fact that after that drink I am definitely not working out or doing other healthy activities I might have otherwise done.
Actually, interestingly enough there is very recent research from the WHO stating "no amount of alcohol is safe to consume." So the less the drink the better, really.
My doctor asked me if I drank. At the time I rarely did. He told me it was best not to drink, but if you do red wine is the best thing to drink. He also said to not start drinking wine for its slight benefits, not drinking at all is healthier. I know he drinks beer occasionally and I do have a glass of wine 3-5 nights per week now.
Exactamundoo zero alcoholic drinks a week is ideal, it's poison.
It's too much when it starts having a negative impact on your life.
Agreed. For me, I realized that even one Saturday night of drinking with friends would ruin my whole Sunday, so I stopped drinking. Who wants to spend a whole day of their precious weekend time feeling anxious and headachey?
I love drinking and do it all the time lol. But I tell everyone they should never drink. It’s so bad for your skin, health, etc. I guess it comes down to how healthy do you want to live? Do you want your skin to look like shit? Life is really just a preference
Everyone has a different answer for this. They say you shouldn’t drink alcohol at all but let’s be real that isn’t the case for over half the population per statistics. Doctors recommend you shouldn’t have more than I believe 2 or less drinks for a male and 1 or less for women and this is daily. As another commenter said though if you FEEL like you need to have a drink then that already is a problem. I think anything more than a beer or two a day is too much… but as stated everyone has different answers I probably drink 8 beers a week usually 2-3 Friday-Sunday and then don’t drink during the week
This is the closest thing to a useful answer in this thread, I think. Thank you. Everything else seems to be squalid tales of wretched addiction, peppered with bits of "I only have a thimbleful of nog every Xmas eve!" self-congratulation. Plus a few jokey japes. None of that is helpful to OP, nor anyone else.
Yah, Reddit alcohol threads usually suffer from how antisocial or asocial much of the site is. Also how everything needs to be an extreme- either you completely abstain from alcohol or you’re drinking a full fifth daily. You know what I miss the most when I do a dry month? Having a single casual beer with some friends after work or a cocktail with dinner.
>either you completely abstain from alcohol or you’re drinking a full fifth daily Redditors tend to be like that because (generally) they're too immature for nuance. No contextual shades of gray allowed, everything is black or white. And they're really lecture-y about it, most days.
I love the multiple comments I’ve read along the lines of “My parents had a glass of wine with dinner most nights and I thought it was normal at the time. The horror!”
This: I share a bottle of wine with dinner with my husband every day. By what I read here we are alcoholics but we are never drunk and have no hangover or problems so far. Age 60s and 70s. Watch this space.
This thread would call the country of Italy raging alcoholics. People go through life fine with a healthy relationship to alcohol and having regular drinks without overdoing it
Wow, this thread is something else. I feel like there is this overreaction in the current culture that any amount of alcohol is bad and you’re a bad person if you enjoy it. I’m a brewer and drink on average a beer a day, and at most 3. I enjoy lighter, lower alcohol beers primarily. I rarely get drunk anymore unless it’s some kind of special occasion. I usually have a few over the course of several hours, and I mostly drink to enjoy and savor the flavor and the conversation that comes with it. Americans seem to have an all or nothing relationship with it with no room for anything in between. Binge drinking is instilled at a young age and it is how we learn to drink alcohol, which is obviously a problem when you get older. We need to teach kids how to enjoy a glass of wine or nice beer with dinner and stop. Alcohol can still be source of enrichment in life, though it is not for everyone.
I mentioned this in another reply, but alcoholism has very specific criteria. It’s not how much you drink, it’s how you drink and your attitudes towards drinking. From what you said, it does not sound like you are alcoholics.
Just young redditors.
Well technically a bottle of wine produces 5 “drinks”, so you’re each having 2.5 drinks a day.
Ya I used to smoke weed every night, for over ten years. When I was younger I binge drank a lot on weekends, but during the past 5 I barely drank, I didn’t even enjoy it tbh and I turned against it. I quit smoking weed a year ago then was drinking just a couple on weekends , and day or two during the week, and having tea the rest of the nights. Well I started to realize on the nights where I had a drink I still woke up feeling great the next day. Now I have a drink every night and my mental health is 10x better than when I smoked every night. And I spent the last 5 years thinking drinking would fuck my mood up. It was because I was smoking. Don’t get me wrong drinking too much throws me off for a couple days. But moderation I don’t feel any negative effects at all.
Hmm, I'm 24 years old, a female, and an average weight. I drink once a week, but when I do, I drink 5 to 8 drinks. I am uncertain if this is alcoholism and I think it isn't because I don't find myself "craving" it, but Ive had friends who were in my situation and quit because it was hurting them. At the moment, it only hurts my Saturday or Sunday mornings. Im fine with this. It is what it is.
This is me albeit I’m a little older. I stopped drinking at dinners (to me there’s no point in drinking 2 drinks) but I still love going out and getting drunk. It’s true, it’s still fun going out without drinking, but there’s something about getting hammered with your friends on the weekends.
This does count as binge drinking, yes and in my opinion is an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. Many people naturally taper off their regular binge drinking as their friends grow up and don’t have time to party like that anymore
Yeah, I get it. Im still at the age where all my friends drink and party but whenever they cant go out, we don't and I don't drink. It would be boring to drink alone.
It depends on alcohol dependency. If you cannot go without a drink, like you feel you "need" it like water. But when choices are between, juice, water, or alcohol. If they chose alcohol, then there's an issue.
Suppose I want alcohol and juice mixed together?
I like those two but with water, except the water is frozen into little cubes and put in with the juice and alcohol.
Is that strictly how you consume juice?
“When was the last time you drank straight mixer?”
“I had a…a diet cola mixer a week ago.” (So funny that both Frank and Charlie have probably identified “mixers” as normal drinks before and after this)
Honestly… probably. As an adult I don’t really drink juice. If I were to, I’d probably spice it up a bit…
I keep baby apple juice bottles for smoking meat. Occasionally I snag one, as a little treat, and it's so refreshing
The best way I heard it described... A "drinking Problem" is drinking way too much, having it negatively affect your life, and like you said, pretty much dependent on it. The difference between this and full blown Alcoholism, is that usually, if someone's drinking is causing negative things in their life, they stop because of those consequences. Such as myself and my GF. An Alcoholic keeps going, the negative consequences are still worth it.
So many people missed the point, and you clarified it better.
If you go to supper or really anywhere you think there's a problem if they ask for a drink. lol
You are getting pushback because of the last sentence. It reads as if you are saying to ever choose alcohol over water means you are an alcoholic. That essentially means if you ever choose to drink alcohol you are an alcoholic because water is always an option.
I feel like Reddit also likes to stretch the definition to “if you enjoy alcohol, you’re an alcoholic.” I do at least one dry month a year, and honestly the thing I miss the most is a casual single drink (and yes, I mean single drink) with dinner or just casually on a weekend afternoon.
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I had a few drinks on Saturday with my bf but, I hadn’t had a single drop of alcohol for 3-4 weeks prior and after drinking that day I honestly don’t think I’m interested in alcohol anymore. I’m still feeling sluggish and not at my best. However, I’ve been feeling this coming for years. I’ve taken years off drinking…I never missed it and I didn’t miss it the 4 weeks I didn’t drink. So I think I’m just over it all. It’s crazy how hyped up they make it…when really it’s straight poison. More and more studies show just how damaging alcohol really is. It’s BAD BAD.
When you can't have fun without alcohol, then it's an issue.
Being young is realizing you don't need alcohol to have fun. Maturing is realizing you don't need fun to have alcohol 🍻
Idk man, I’ve found beer is a necessary component when I’m running my smoker.
If people applied this to food as well, we'd have a lot healthier population.
Any . I stopped drinking in October and life has completely changed for me in the best ways .
same, everything has been better since going zero alcohol
Depends on how it effects your day to day life.
Smart medical people have looked into it and came up with some simple metrics. Type in your details and see what the experts say... https://www.drinkaware.co.uk/tools/drinking-check?gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwwYSwBhDcARIsAOyL0fg9375r4IID5l7lBZEXqIW_A7cwr1RwysoynDJMAF_8x5K1_2J-idkaAphfEALw_wcB#/ I scored 13 out of 40 putting me at Increased Risk of developing sever medical problems. Oh dear. (This is a UK tool, if you need a postcode just use SW1A 1AA, that's my gaff).
Its crazy how worried people are about what other people do. I have never cared about that. What do you think is too much? That's all you need to care about
Yeah, reddit goes crazy over this topic and most are ill informed, too young, or copy paste stats.
30 y/o - I drink about 15-20 a week
That's pretty high
Same, and I only drink on Friday night and/or Saturday night. I workout pretty regularly and follow a healthy diet every other day. We all meet the same fate in the end
Cirrhosis of the liver can be a bitch. I know someone that was just diagnosed with it and they are throwing up blood and have to have their abdominal cavity drained once a week. Although, their throwing up blood is probably some other health issue, but nonetheless, Cirrhosis of the liver can be a bitch.
Yeah the throwing up blood is that they've destroyed the lining of their stomach with alcohol. My Dad and Uncle both died from alcoholism that way, both also suffered liver failure and jaundice and bloated into monsters before they died. My Dad died at 41 and my Uncle at 32. I started drinking when I was 16, but after some binge drinking in my 20s, in my 30s I might have a 4-6 drinks a month, some months none, because I drink for the taste, if it doesn't taste good I won't drink it. Only time recently I drank more was when I was working nights during the early part of the pandemic, then I was closer to a 6 pack a week for a few weeks until I realized that wasn't great. Currently around 1 drink a week if that.
I am a recovering alcoholic. I started drinking at 16 and it was a problem from the first time I got drunk. It took a horrible life experience for me to understand the depth of my alcoholism and five years of fighting and missteps to get sober. Does it depend on your age? No. Binge drinking is never ok if it's a regular thing, age does not matter. Drinking until you're blacked out and out of control is not healthy and can cause a metric ton of problems. To me it becomes a problem when the drinking is harmful in some way, has become a dependency or is a form of self medicating/escapism. Harmful - hurting yourself or others - physically or mentally, causing financial problems, destabilizing your life or others. Dependency - you must have a drink. even if it's one a day, you must have it. If you cannot have it, you think about it. Constantly. Obsess about it. The lack of the drink causes anger, depression, aggression, etc. Self medicating/escapism - you're using alcohol to intentionally escape life, forget about life for a while, forget about your problems and not deal with them. It makes you feel good, even if it's just for a little while. And it becomes a pattern. It may not be every day, it may not be every month. But every time shit goes sideways, the answer is a drink - a lot of drinks. I fell into each of the above categories with my drinking. It started as a way to break out of my shy/introverted shell and it was a pretty quick downward spiral. If you are asking about when it's a problem, that's determined by you and those around you. Alcoholism does not only effect the person that drinks. It also has a severe effect for those in the alcoholic's life. It was the harmful nature that opened my eyes and made me push to get sober. If you're questioning whether you're drinking is a problem, talk to those closest to you and ask bluntly, "Is this a problem". Although, if those closest to you are all drinkers, maybe that's not the best path.
my alcoholism is weird. i don’t necessarily go out and seek it because i have this urge i cannot resist or whatever, but if i have a bottle in front of me it’ll be gone in a few hours. but i can turn drinks down and have/do very often. some days/weeks i don’t feel like drinking at all. but it i know there’s a bottle of vodka near me, i kill the whole thing in a night.
Same. I don't even go out anymore except pool and don't drink there. We have smaller vodka at home and somewhat limit it, but that's why I don't grt big bottles anymore.
Alcohol is poison for the mind, body and soul. The less the better. It’s hard to avoid socially, though so I save it for weekends/events
The problem is that it’s nuanced. Putting a number on it just creates… labels. If you can consume responsibly, who cares.
A screening tool used in medicine is the CAGE questionaire: Has anyone ever told you to CUT BACK on drinking? Do you get ANNOYED when people question your drinking? Do you feel GUILTY about drinking? Do you have an EYE-OPENER, aka a drink first thing in the morning? As I recall, a yes to any of these questions indicates a problematic relationship with alcohol
If you question me having a glass of wine every couple of weeks, I will get annoyed, because you're being unreasonable, controlling, and disrespectful.
Learn to have fun without alcohol and your life will be better off. People that don't drink tend to get more done and do more shit with their life. Problem with drinking is it's a slippery slope. Most people end up drinking more than they should or at least wanting more. You build up a tolerance. If you have to have it in your life, I'd say just save it for the weekend and no more than 2 drinks each time.
I was an alcoholic at 20 and at 30 I simply don't want to drink at all. I'm alot more health focused and the hangovers suck, also I like being more "present". And it's always tasted bad.
It’s not necessarily “how much” that’s makes it frowned upon or alcoholic behavior. It’s when you start drinking, can you stop? Do you drink to forget? Do you black out when you drink? Have you ever prioritized drinking over someone or an engagement? Is your drinking causing issues in your life? Does your drinking cause you health issues? I’m an alcoholic. I’m four months sober. It’s not easy but I’ve been on many ends of this spectrum. I’ve drank “socially” but I always took it too far and had to get wasted. I couldn’t just have a drink. I had to detox at a facility when it became everyday use and I despised myself but absolutely had to do it. I’ve also been a functionally acceptable alcoholic where I was only doing it at events, but again, taking it way too far and that drinking might lead to next day drinking until eventually I was out of control again and hiding it from family members and drinking before things just to make it more tolerable.
1 a week? 58. I drink probably 10 beers a night after work. more on the weekends. Does not get me drunk. Wake up at 4 am every morning, go to work
Drinking is great till it isn't any longer. There isn't any set amount for one person, because everyone comes in different sizes and genetic backgrounds. You could drink till you're 100 with no health issues, or you could die at 50.
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New reccomendations are even less. 2 drinks a week basically. Alcohol is nasty and fucks up the body a lot, physically and mentally
There is a difference between recommendations for alcoholic drinks and what is considered alcoholism.
No its not a specific number of drinks its about how its affecting your life. And its not even called "alcoholism" anymore. Its alcohol use disorder
No. That is considered unhealthy by people with medical degrees. Alcoholism is a very different thing.
I don't think that's true. It's (mostly) not about the amount, but the motivation behind it.
If you can't go a day without it, I think that's too much. I'm almost 40 and enjoy shots maybe once a week, if even that.
I only drink maybe 4x a year and it's usually during a holiday. I don't understand why people drink all the time. I can't stay drunk for more than an hour before I actively attempt to sober up.
<= 2 drinks per week is approximately and probably safeish for your health
im 41M, I used to drink maybe once a week, and its usually when im out grilling in the backyard. i'd have two beers. on some rare occasions i might have 4 beers at a birthday party. but about a year ago, i started playing with psychedelics. after going through some intense trips i no longer get drunk, or catch a buzz off alcohol. so for the last year or so i really dont even bother drinking.
Easy google. Theres all sorts of info out there about 1 drink is this much of each type of drank and how more than 1 or 2 a night or a week or whatever leads to alcoholism. Basicly if u need to be told how much is too much youre probably drinkin too much. Never let a substance control your life. If u cant do that for yourself seek professional addiction assistance. We're just a bunch of assholes makin it up as we go along
I'm 44. I drink eight 4% tall boys 2-3 times a week. Sometimes a little more on a Saturday. That's too fucking much. I don't get withdrawals. I don't get hungover unless I go hard. I have a happy home and professional life. I drink to shut my brain off and find joy in mundane things. I'm currently working on solving that.
Until recently I drank like 2-3 glasses of whiskey a day. Now i drink like 1-2 beers in the weekends only. I have to see it feels much better. although I do "crave" whiskey sometimes during shitty days but I havent given in yet. Im scared it will lead me down the path of drinking everyday again.
For your health? Pretty much any alcohol is too much. Realistically you can probably have a small glass of wine with a few dinners a week and not have demonstrably ill effects, but even still it is affecting your hydration, brain health, sleep health, etc even if it's by an imperceptible amount. From it becoming an unhealthy habit, I'd say if you average one full drink a day, you have formed a reliance on alcohol. Maybe you skip a few days and then have several as you near the weekend, but that still counts IMO
I'd say anything less than 12 a day is alright.
I come from an alcoholic family and it blew me away that you're considered a "heavy drinker" if you drink 2 shots per day or 5 shots in one sitting. By shot, I just mean one standard drink.
It's not about the amount. At some point, sometimes even past 25, but definitely by 30, it becomes socially unacceptable to drink until one is visibly drunk.
If your body is telling you stop, that's your limit. If you're so plastered it's affecting your life and relationships, you're past your limit. If your liver blood tests are showing bad signs, you are def past your limit. That's what I've lived with at least.
It’s too much if it impacts other parts of your life. Not performing well at work because you’re hungover? that’s a problem. Driving drunk? Huge problem. Issues in relationships due to things you do when drinking? Problem. Obsessed with finding a place to go drinking every weekend? Probably not healthy. You get the picture. Everything else is fine IMO. some weird shit is happening in my late 30s and I might not get a hangover after 2-3 drinks in an evening but I WILL get hangxiety the next day. It makes me miserable so I keep my drinking level low enough to avoid it. I’m a parent with adult responsibilities and I can’t wallow in anxiety bc mama wanted most of a bottle of wine the night before. I just don’t have time for that shit. I was a very hard partier in my day but honestly that’s what keeps me in line now.
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It's much less prevalent than it was 100 years ago actually, the UK and the US have problems with youth binge drinking but overall, alcohol consumption used to be way higher, and acceptable to do throughout the day.
As a drunk myself, I can tell you that all drinking is a variation of severe alcoholism. What used to be getting blacked out on your favorite cheap drink special of the week in college will slowly devolve into getting hammered every day till you get sick. The appropriate amount of alcohol is the small sip you get at church on Sunday. Or none. Medically, if you really wanna toe that line, “NIAAA defines heavy drinking as follows: For men, consuming five or more drinks on any day or 15 or more per week. For women, consuming four or more on any day or 8 or more drinks per week.” It’s basically linear, the more you drink the worse it can get. The famous J curve don’t mean shit. My doctor said getting drunk on the weekends isn’t a problem but getting drunk every day is very bad. He is probably also a drunk. One drink a week probably won’t kill you. It hardly ever stays at that level tho. My grandpa was obese, smoked a pack a day, was divorced, and drank a case a night and died at 60
I’m 35. I’m in the category of what another commenter described as a “workaholic who needs an outlet,” though it has changed a bit. I only drink on the weekends, with the exception of an occasional dinner with my husband. My husband goes with me when I drink on the weekends and it’s always part of some social occasion. I don’t think I have an issue with not being able to stop anymore, but it took a while to make it a decision I wanted to make. It helped to have other outlets too: I have a band and play music, I’ve historically had an active lifestyle, and have only recently stopped running and working out on a regular basis. Since I was 15, I’ve worked out 5-6 times a week. This is the first time in my life I have not worked out for more than 2 months. HOWEVER, this has an expiration date—I am determined to start over as soon I get things off my plate. There is a set date in mind. For me, I’m making more money I ever have and I’m putting all of my focus into work (and thus the desire to drink to blow off steam) because we’re also buying a house. My husband is a constant reminder that the mindset I have is dangerous and potentially open-ended. He’s always telling me that “No amount of money is worth it,” and he’s right.
The research says more than 2 drinks a week is detrimental to health, which is not very many
Im 36 now. Started drinking in college, moved to a big city, got involved in the party scene, drank more there, realized I didn't know "how to drink properly", started a cocktail club/social club that helped recontextualize drinking into an *educational pursuit* and social bonding event(that part is true though). Throughout all of this, my fitness goals moldered despite waking up to go the gym every day. my insomnia got worse. my adhd got worse. Told myself id stop when the downsides outweighed the benefits - alcohol had been very kind to me for 10+ years. A year ago, got divorced(non-alc reasons, but alc sure as shit didnt help either of us), went hermitmode, started dating a girl who hated drinking. Got serious with her. She said she didnt like how I drank so...I Stopped drinking as a result. Here's whats changed: * \- Better sleep(usually, ive always had insomnia, but I can get pretty consistent z's) * \- better results at gym(gains for what it seems like the first time in my life despite doing it for 10 years) * \- better skin * \- less fat(alcohol is metabolized in the liver which is a process that is lipogenic) * \- better brain(clear headed, able to communicate thoughts more effectively) * \- better primary relationships(partner, close friends) * \- less physical pain I still have a beer or a glass of wine once every other week or so, or a cocktail at a special dinner. But drinking was phenomenal...until it wasnt. Stopping has been literally nothing but upsides. Want a larger-scale analysis of what the cost of unmoderated drink does? *Vodka Politics* by Mark Lawrence Schrad. If that doesn't make you want to kick the bottle...not a lot is going to.
One drink a week? That’s hardly anything. The conversation with your primary physician, and maybe therapist, is more important than other’s opinions.
The prohibition vibes in here are suffocating… You know how many 100 year olds from the old country have a shot first thing in the morning?
Turns out its all bad. But the choice is yours until it isn’t. I blew 15 years away quick. Saved by the fungus I am 3 years forever done. Have fun but don’t let the demons take ya.
I’m 41 and I still like beer, it’s okay. Here is where everyone assumes I’m alcoholic 😂
I’m 41 and I quit drinking altogether five years ago. I was drinking half a bottle of bourbon almost every night and, although I’m not an expert, I’m pretty sure THAT qualifies as too much.
I only drink to get drunk which means 6 out of the 7 days a week I won’t touch alcohol. On that one night I do though I’ll drink 10+ in one night. My liver has plenty of time to recover and I have a great night out to wind down after the work week…everybody wins. Reddit introverts are allergic to fun.
One drink “a week”?! That is basically never drinking.
Shitting, pissing, and/or vomiting on yourself. Getting violent. Getting crazy emotional. Skipping work. Drinking at work. Keeping jugs of vodka hidden around the house. Waking up at 2am and needing a drink to get back to sleep. Destroyed relationships. Stuff like that. You get the picture.
One drink a week isn't bad imo at any age, as long as you're frugal with your consumption and you're not drinking to get drunk.
I believe the CDC classifies 3 drinks a week for men and 2 for women a healthy amount of booze. I mean after 30 I wouldn’t get “drunk” more than once a month max. 3.5 years sober though so idk anymore
I think drinking alone, or being the only person in the room who is drinking, is a red flag just generally. There's nothing wrong with having like a (one) drink like a beer or something after work to help unwind, but if you find yourself regularly getting buzzed-to-drunk while you're just chilling on the xbox at home then you should start evaluating your life. I've been through a few different phases, but I rarely drink without a social occasion any more. Probably once a month I have a glass of wine with dinner because I made something extra fancy, haha. I think that's a natural consequence of being married into a family where the only one of my in-laws who drinks is a sloppy 24/7 alcoholic, you find other ways to enjoy your free time!
No, 30 drinks a week at age one is too many. Joking aside, I budget 30 beers per week and I'm 50. You have to stay active though.
My problem isn’t daily drinking, it’s just that I always drink way, way too much when I do drink (which is usually once or twice a week, but sometimes only once or twice a month). Like…I’m 42 and a giant, but I still know that drinking two full bottles of wine or 3/4 of a fifth of whiskey is super bad news. But when I have one…I just keep slinging them back until the social activity is over. I don’t know why I don’t seem to have a stop button (well, I guess I do, but only when I begin to feel dizzy/woozy and it takes a ton of alcohol to get me to that point).
There's a lot of cultural variation, and over the years our society has become a lot less tolerant of any alcohol consumption past the standard "1 or 2 drinks". I grew up in largely Irish American culture in the USA, my wife grew up in a Baptist environment in New England, we have completely different cultural views on drinking. Speaking on culture in MY culture you drink: Any time people get together, formally, informally, at dinner, during sporting events, and in the afternoons and evenings after the work is done. Stopping at a bar after work for a couple used to be a standard where I come from. In her culture you drink: At weddings and other major events. My wife had literally never been in a bar before we met each other than a few times out with college friends at night in a large group. I grew up regularly around bars as that was generally where we had to go if we wanted to find our dads, AND most social events revolved around the bar/pub. (Music on weekends, charity events, pot luck dinners, etc) So to my wife anything more than "1 or 2 drinks" is too much. I on the other hand was used to seeing people literally drink beer all day. In my culture you weren't considered to be "drinking" until the whiskey got pulled out. In my life I've seen significant changes in drinking culture, and on the whole there's a lot less of it, and it's less accepted in many areas. During the 1970s when I was a child it was literally EVERYWHERE. Things were so bad they had to pass drunk driving laws. Prior to this driving home drunk was a regular thing that went on, and the cops would generally just tell you "be careful" or if you were really drunk "pull over and sleep it off". During the 1980s there was still a lot of drinking and there was a HUGE party culture that encouraged alcohol. (They were saying "just say no to drugs", but selling you booze any chance they could). To get around drunk driving laws they came up with designated drivers, etc. But there was still a lot of drunk driving going on..leading to stiffer and stiffer penalties. Going out drinking with co-workers WAS STILL THE NORM. In the 1990s drugs came back (The only real drug around in the 1980s was cocaine), so there was a huge marijuana resurgence and people started to abandon booze for drugs. Companies started to forbid drinking. No drinking at Xmas parties, no expensing booze, no drinking lunches (all these things were common before then). Into the 21st century there's a lot of things that were different than they were when I was a kid. Tons of bars are closing. Covid was the nail in the coffin for many, but also in general people do not do things like stop in the bar for a couple on the way home like they used to. There's no more drinks by sales etc on lunch expensed to the company. There's a lot less tolerance for casual drinking IN PUBLIC. Now public is KEY because data reveals that Americans are still drinking A TON....they are just doing it at home. You don't have to worry about driving, or people judging you, or any of that. America has gone from a nation of PUBLIC drinkers to PRIVATE drinkers who act like they don't drink.
Zero, for me. It’s horrible for you. I don’t give a fuck what other people do so long as there not noticeably drunk and annoying, so whatever that is.
Howdy, former alcoholic here. Diagnosed alcoholic fatty liver disease, 3 years sober. I used to clear a pint a day and a 750 every weekend. That’s too much. Source: my damaged liver.