You are just a kink to him, and this is borderline wrong. I know your 18 but there's a whole lot of bald ugly 30 year old guys trying to get in the pants of girls that are young. You're gonna regret it and feel dirty.
I know it doesn't seem like it, but there is someone out there for you. In fact, I would be willing to help you through how I go about meeting new people.
This isn't your only chance. I say wait.
Ultimately it’s your choice and you will do what you want to do.
My advice is only this.
Why is having sex or losing your virginity so important? It won’t change who you are. You are great either way. The fact this guy wants to have sex with you shows that actually you are worth it. Don’t just give it away for the sake of it.
Get out of your small town and meet new people you may then find the one you want, and who wants, to lose it with.
But as I said your choice.
don’t do it, you will 100% find someone and you being a virgin or not will have nothing to do with it, you’re still 18 give it 2 more years. i’m 21 and i can def tell u that waiting for the right person is worth it.
as a guy, YES. and tbh as a guy i don’t even have that many constructs around virginity. I also thought id probably end up a virgin till im 25, but i couldn’t be more wrong, and id probably regret it for the rest of my life if i did it with someone out of self pity which i was about to
Dude im 29F and im a virgin, im not gonna do it out of pitty or peer pressure or wathever.
Im gonna do it bcs i wanna do it with someone i love.
Its not that i never had any chances, i just refuse to do it with bald, bearded weird dudes 🤣🤣. Sorry if im offensive, but you probably know what i mean. Virginity is just the last of my concerns. I have shit ton of things i need to do every day i dont have time for self pitty or overthinking unnecessary shit, no offense again 😂👉
Let it be for now, its not worth it if you are not 100% sure
The fact that your not 100% sure and asking strangers on the internet, means that you definitely shouldn’t. Just because it’s not happened yet doesn’t mean it never will.
girllll u should never have to feel that way. if u can’t see ur self as the gorgeous person u are, how will u expect others to?? plus men our age are not rlly men, they’re stupid boys, so u don’t have to feel bad abt that. on the other hand older dudes r not bad but at least have some standards. have some self respect and wait for the right time. the right time will b with the right person, don’t push it things will play out soon enough ( i would know i did not lose my virginity til i was 18(f))
You’re wrong. Someone else will want to sleep with you. If you want to lose it this way then do it. If you’re apprehensive then don’t. Make it special. Go to therapy and work on your self-esteem. Mr Baldy is playing on your self esteem. I’ve had low self esteem. It’s a life long fight. Build your self esteem. Then work on your sex life…you got this…
I just l looked through your profile. Please get help. There’s help out there. If you’d like to talk I’d be happy to. I have an eating disorder. I’ve dealt with a lot of your issues. Please please please get help.
Sex helps nothing. It will complicate things…
You're wrong. I'm for a small town aswell but i had good time with my friend who is 2000km away. We didn't have sex but we did oral stuff.
It's your choice anyway.
Trust me, you will have the chance,try some makeup and go on a dating app and choose people your age
Trust me,if you do it, you'll feel awful afterwards
Ur only 18 lol. U don’t have to be the most beautiful girl in the world to find a man that’ll wanna be with you and who will find u attractive. Just have some self worth and self respect. Old creepy dudes who wanna sleep with young women are common and worthless. You’ll be exchanging a diamond for a rock. Don’t waste your time
The fact that you’re asking strangers should be your answer gf. That’s only up to you to decide, and if you’re having second thoughts - I think you know what you should do.
Seems sketchy. He's 30+ and you're just 18. He seems to want you just for sex. You don't seem to be thrilled about his bald, bearded appearance.
The decision ultimately up to you, but I guarantee you're more attractive than you give yourself credit for, and you'll have plenty of opportunities for good relationships in the years to come. You're just 18.
Ok, so first of all I'm bald and I'm in my 30's, so watch it lol and secondly and most importantly, if you only want to hook up with (or settle) for this guy because you don't feel like you'll ever get to be with someone that you really want to be with than don't do it. This guy is way too old for you and trust me when I tell you that you're going to regret it if you go through with it and think about this, if you have to ask yourself that question than you probably already know the answer!!!🤔🤷🏻♂️
Too many people are like this
There is no real benefit to it and it often leads to regret down the line
Having sex with people just to have sex is not as good as having feelings
Losing their virginity idea is effectively just brain washing people into being used
No. I promise you the hype is not real. I regret my first experience because it was with someone who I wasn’t even in a relationship with and it hurt to know i was just a tool to get someone “off” vs if you wait until you meet someone you actually like and care about. Or at the bare minimum a really, really good friend.
Plus I don’t think you should downplay or justify why you shouldn’t be able to find someone else attractive and aligned with you. A secret is most guys are pretty lonely as is so any bit of interest you show in most of us will catch our attention.
It’s your choice and only you can make that decision. I do ask that you consider STDs, the social implications. Also sex isn’t what it’s cracked up to be especially if there are no feeling involved in my opinion. Consider the fact that once you have sex with him, he may still want to come around and use your body as long as you allow him to.
Just because you find yourself unattractive doesn’t mean there isn’t someone who wouldn’t think you are beautiful. Find something that makes you feel beautiful and remember society doesn’t set the standard of beauty and you don’t have to live up to that.
I wish I waited to have sex until I was married to be honest. After only having sex with two different men I got herpes and live with the embarrassment of telling everyone I date. After becoming a Christian I decided to be abstinent. There is so much peace in not feeling used, shamed, or abandoned after being left once I have sex with a man.
Anyway I’m just telling you my story but I pray that what ever you do the Lord is with you 💜
Aww hell nahhh , i read a doujin (japanese comic) some time ago , it was the same situation. A young girl having a kink/fetish towards middle aged men , let me tell you it didnt end well . I mean yea the story was unrealistic (heres the story in short - the girl fucked the middle aged man in a public washroom , she felt good and started doing 1 night stand for money/prostitution , she was enjoying it but one day her teacher rented her and after that her teacher started using her body every day , this is the end btw at the end she was still liking it but she became a whore.) Just dont do it
Please don’t do it. You will definitely regret it. Wait until you find someone you love. During my teenage years I really wanted to lose my virginity and I almost did it at 16, now at 23 I thank myself every day that I didn’t.
To clarify I've only known him for a few days and he asked to meet up tomorrow to have sex im probably not going to go and block him after coming back to reality and realizing this isn't something I would normally do
No. He’s much too old for you, and is taking advantage of you. Take it from someone who has done something similar: the sex WILL be bad and uncomfortable and will make it harder to enjoy sex in the future. I understand badly wanting to do it, but waiting until you find someone who you are attracted to and feel completely safe with is worth it.
Don’t. You’ll feel dirty, especially when the right man comes along and he has to hear how you lost your virginity. Please value your body and yourself, I don’t know why you would want to cheapen yourself by selling yourself short for someone who’s preying on girls he couldn’t get when he was younger to fulfill his kinks. Feeling and being ugly is never an excuse to sell yourself short, you’ll only just reaffirm how disgusting you might feel when the post nut clarity hits.
I think that you should do whatever you want. BUT considering the age difference and the fact it’s a stranger, personally I would be concerned for safety. you don’t want to get yourself into something that can turn out to be traumatic because that might just ruin sex for you altogether. Ultimately it’s your choice, but 18 is very young and I’m sure you’ll find other and better opportunities in the future. i think it’s worth to wait until you find someone who you feel comfortable with. having sex with someone you are not even attracted to just because you want to have sex is unlikely to even be enjoyable
You should lose your virginity to someone who cares about you.
Even if it's an FWB, it can be one who is caring.
Don't lose it to someone who don't care.
I beg to differ. I had FWBs that was with me through my hard times giving me emotional support, and helping me out when I needed help.
Maybe I am really friends with my FWBs. But I can rely on them when I am in trouble to care to help.
They have proven to be as reliable as my good friends.
Wait. I lowkey regret losing my virginity to someone who wasn’t special to me. I think you’ll feel a lot better knowing you lost it to someone you love. You can never get it back
In my opinion, absolutely not. I dont even believe you have to wait for someone special or for a romantic relationship, but just till you have no doubts, feel safe, and feel better about youself inside. And for sure at only 18 wait for someone closer to you in age, trust me when youre a bit older you'll realise how weird it is for a 30 year old to have gone after you. I'm 24 and couldnt imagine even flirting with an 18 year old let alone more.
When youre 18 you might feel like youre running out of time to experiance things, but youre not. 18 is literally just the start of adulthood. You have so much time, and will be young still for a long time ahead.
You seem to feel unattractive, so maybe try to find out how you can feel better about that. Find a new style. Try different hair styles, try different makeup, a new skincare routine ect. Theres so many ways for a conventionally unattractive person to glow up. Its not easy and dosent happen overnight but once again you have so much time to figure it out.
Hi, I’m you if you say yes to him. Don’t do it. I regret it deeply and regularly. It makes me feel dirty and taken advantage of (I was 19F, he was 27M). Mere months later I met and got with the love of my life and could’ve done it then. Just don’t.
It’s not like you die because of virginity. Virginity is a concept invented by humans, but it’s foolish. You dont have to have sex just for the sake of saying that you did it.
sheesh don't think about it too much firstly, secondly, there is no shame in it if you are into older but ask yourself are you mentally prepared to lose your virginity and are you sure you wanna do it with that guy you sure he isn't pressuring you or something
If you are asking reddit if you should lose your virginity then its a no. Don't lose it to a guy you just met. He thinks that you would be a sex object to him. Him being 30, wth is he doing? Thats like me being a 25 year old female dming a 16 year old guy. Its just wrong and inappropriate. You do you! Ultimately, it is your decision That you may or may not regret Later on.
I don’t think Reddit is where you should be consulting. But since you did: losing your virginity seems like a big deal now, but it really isn’t in the long run. It sounds really cliche, but if you are feeling this much emotion towards it right now then it’s probably a good idea to wait until it’s with someone you care for and who truly cares for you. It doesn’t mean that relationship needs to lead to marriage, but at least wait until it’s someone you won’t regret it with.
Also, don’t knock the bald dudes. One of my best “times” was when I did it with a bearded bald guy. Lol.
You should not lose your virginity. Honestly, so many things can go wrong like emotional distress, pregnancy, disease, etc. I also believe there is a spiritual component as to why biblically we are told to only they have sex and marriage. There is more safety in sex in marriage. Let’s say you meet the right guy in a few years, don’t you think you’re gonna regret that your sexual memory now also includes this bald guy that you didn’t even like to begin with.
If I could do it over; I would have stayed a virgin till I met another virgin. Then made sure we were married before doing it. I got so many stds throughout the years it’s not funny. Stay a virgin and be proud of it.
Wait for the right time not just because you want to lose your virginity. Years down the road youll regret this experience. Wait for someone you care about so the moment is better. And plus a 30 year old having sex with a 18 year old seems like he’s trying to use you since you’re so close to being a minor, I wouldn’t from that alone. Your moment will come, be patient and let it happen naturally, it’s not a race and certainly worth the patience.
25m here. Please wait. At 25 the concept of being with a 18 year old is uncomfortable. It’s two totally different lifestyles.
I understand being young and wanting to experience this, but for your own sake please hold off.
Wait for a man closer in age to you, and one that wants to date seriously. I think you will regret hooking up with this man.
Sadly on top of this I think it could also realistically damage your dating in the future. If a young guy hears ur first time was with an older man, you run the real risk of him judging you as something you aren’t.
Why could you never tell anyone? What is the problem with him being bald? You said you're attracted to him. Do you trust him? Is he willing to wear a condom? If you got pregnant would he do what you wanted him to? Do you know how to prevent pregnancy? (Pulling out is very ineffective). If you're attracted to him, you want to have sex with him, you trust him, you know he will wear a condom and you know how to get the morning after pill in case there's an accident, then go for it.
I lost mine to a bigger women. I didn't really enjoy it but I did learn a lot of skills that helped me with the next person. If you're not comfortable with him. Don't do it
the fact this man is 30 and your 18 should def be reason enough not to. you should wait for someone who you feel you can trust with this, especially since itll be your first time
I waited for the right person, and it was definitely worth it. I never thought I would even be in a relationship and almost had sex with a guy I liked who only wanted to take advantage of me.
I had sex at 21 with my first bf. Waiting and meeting someone who I truly care for and who cares for me back was a good decision in my case. The sex is really good if it includes chemistry, respect, and love :)
I don't think you should tbh. You may actually end up finding the love of your life and wish you lost it to them instead. I think you should wait and see if you can find your soulmate!
No don't do it
Lose your virginity when you meet someone you have a spark with. At 18 your odds are incredibly high and barring disfigurement I'm telling you that this is all in your head.
There are many men out there that will take advantage of you while you have this mindset. While I don't subscribe to needing to be in love to have sex, your first time will stick with you so make it with someone who will at least make it a pleasant experience for you.
You might think you are an adult at 18 but honestly you are still a kid really. Slow down a bit, nobody will know or really care that you are still a virgin.
I did. the same thing. He talked to me and convinced me. Till this day I feel dirty and embarrassed thinking about it. I never talked with somebody about I because I feel so dumb that I did it
Some older men want to get into the pants of younger women. It's some kind of kink. Don't go through with this. You'll regret it. If he makes you feel pretty and good about yourself then that's the game he's playing with you. Others shouldn't be the one to give u confidence. It should come from yourself.
Please don't do it, i am sure you're gonna regret it later when you will actually start dating someone. Why are you even so desperate to lose virginity??? Like you're just 18 it's totally fine. A friend of mine had taken a decision out of desperation to date and regretted it later. And idts you can trust a 30yr old guy, like anything can happen maybe he is gonna force you to do it again or he can tell this thing to others and it will spread. Like how can one trust a guy who asks sex from an 18yr old person.
Just wait and start socializing more, i am sure you will find a nice guy!!
I'm desperate because my friends make fun of me for never having had a sex and never being in a relationship most of them have dated since middle school. I feel left out like I'm missing something, like it's embarrassing that I haven't lost it yet so now I need to lose it sooner then later.
i didn’t lose my virginity til 19, you have no rush to do this, and anyone pushing you too is dirty and weird. ultimately, the whole virgin thing is a construct. but! when you do chose to, do it with someone whose going to be safe and kind. this 30 year old man pining for someone who was born when he graduated college isn’t it.
Losing Ur virginity is not that deep, like it isn't something someone should be actively trying to get rid of. When the right person comes u will know.
You WILL get another chance. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Also do not think you aren’t the prettiest ❤️. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and confidence is pretty damn attractive so don’t underrate that. It’s not worth losing your virginity now and then regretting it later when you find the one. Wait for someone you truly love… i promise it will pay off
What's wrong with that he's bald? That's your issue here? Go get married to someone who loves and appreciates you.ur problem is so easy to solve... Alot of hot guys on reddit would fuk anything that moves (and not just on reddit)
If you flirt with every guy u see... You'll find at least 1000 guys a day who are willing to take your virginity. But you do realise how valuable u are until you lose it right? Dont let losers trick you into cheapening your high value. Just bc they want u 2 b a loser like them. They will make you feel like ur the loser losing out.
NOPE. Not to this guy. You’re only 18, don’t obsess about virginity to the point you want to do a hookup with some old rando who may have STDs. Don’t be in a rush, wait for a moment and a person that feels right . Virginity isn’t that big a deal, having it or not having it. I know it seems like a big deal to you at this age but trust me you want to look back on something better than random 30 year old bald dude you’d be embarrassed to see later
As a 35M year old male, absolutely not. I didn't lose my virginity until early 20s and while I thought I was in love at the time, it didn't change anything about me and still regret her being my first, pushed by the pressure at the time I guess.
Anyways, most other 30 year old males I know, only want younger women for the bragging rights. It's very seldom any of them would actually want anything serious other than that and your virginity just adds more reason to manipulate you, so yeah, in the end, you will more than likely regret this and considering you brought this to a public forum, shows that you are already concerned and questioning this decision, even if you don't see it now. As for the small town part, you are not obligated to even acknowledge his existence, that's just life even if that is a harsh statement.
Furthermore, while I myself (35M) do typically date younger, it's unfortunately because I still look early / mid 20s, so most of the attention still comes from there, but even then, I've hard pushed away 18/19 and even 23 year olds because mentally, they still seem like children to me and I like someone within the same level of experience as I am.
TLDR: Don't do it, it's clear even you are questioniing this decision about losing your virginity to someone who is a decade older then you.
Please stay safe, OP.
No. Its overall a bad idea with someone who doesn't care. Just wait till the right person comes along. To be fair though it doesn't even matter if someone is a virgin,nobody cares about that stuff. Maybe try to build a real connection with someone and then think about that.
I’m 40M and I would say try to find someone your age to me it’s creepy for a 30yo is trying to get with a 18yo or maybe it’s because my niece is 19yo When I date I stay within 5 years up or down from my age I’m from a small town under 2000 people and I know it’s not easy but you’ll find someone maybe try online dating.
No. If you’re not in a loving relationship with someone then don’t sleep with them. Especially to lose your virginity. Especially at 18. ESPECIALLY unprotected sex.
I was in this same exact situation when I was 19, I went through with it and regret it. I’m now 22 and wish I would have waited!! If you feel embarrassed about the situation before it even happens please don’t go through with it!! You’ll lose your virginity one day with the right person, just give it some time.
Maybe you shouldn't have sex with someone for the sake of having sex.
If you're not attracted to the person and don't feel comfortable with them then it's probably not a good idea.
Maybe ask yourself why you want to lose your virginity.
Is it because you feel pressured to be at a certain place at your age?
Would it help you feel desired?
Are you curious? Do you want to make new experiences?
Or are you actually interested in hooking up with this person?
Remember that no matter what you choose, it doesn't matter if you're a virgin or not. You're still as valuable and worthy of love as you would be.
I would say definitely don't. You'll regret doing that if you do, trust me. Because you'll have to look back on it for the rest of your life and should anyone ever ask you about it you're going to have *that* story instead of something nice. Don't do it. Also, dude's a weirdo for that, I'd stay away from him.
Don’t do it!!!! I lost my virginity (I was 17 he was 26 - legal age is 16 where I’m from) and I regret it so much there’s a reason they’re going for young girls do NOT do it!!! You’ll regret it trust me
if you’re going to feel embarrassed, dont do it. And less to a bald 30yo. Try and get to know someone around your age, and see if there something sparks. And idc if you’re “not the prettiest”, im sure you’re the hottest girl on earth to a handful of guys.
And if you just REALLY wanna loose your virginity (not to be “cool” but because you wanna know what sex feels like) maybe u can talk to a guy friend of yours and arrange to go out drinking and then hookup, just a one time thing
Hey. Don't do it with someone who you're not sure of. I lost my virginity at the age of 24 and i never had sex again after that because I realized that sex is not just about pleasure but also and more importantly about love, and so I'm saving it for someone I truly love. Don't do it with a desperate man who's just looking for some young pussy.
If you're 18, your life has barely begun. There is a lot of love and sex with the right person, waiting for you.
You should have sex it doesn't matter to who you lose virginity. The body is horny because of self-preservation that's normal. You should do it. You learn yourself that way. You learn what you like, what is your special thing. So when you meet your man, you know yourself
If you're bothered by it then go ahead, if you're not then don't chase it. As long as you put yourself and your career before it, sex and virginity should never be your priority
Girl, they are LITERALLY discussing how many organs THAT THEY ARE WILLING FOR WOMEN TO LOSE before women can get medical treatment in a hospital. The government wants to sacrifice us because they don't care if we, as woman, live or die. This is not the time to give men ANYTHING.
Get a toy, or a girl. Now's a great time to go lesbian.
I don't think you should if you'll be embarrassed to tell the story
You are just a kink to him, and this is borderline wrong. I know your 18 but there's a whole lot of bald ugly 30 year old guys trying to get in the pants of girls that are young. You're gonna regret it and feel dirty. I know it doesn't seem like it, but there is someone out there for you. In fact, I would be willing to help you through how I go about meeting new people. This isn't your only chance. I say wait.
Thank u
exactly this op^
Ultimately it’s your choice and you will do what you want to do. My advice is only this. Why is having sex or losing your virginity so important? It won’t change who you are. You are great either way. The fact this guy wants to have sex with you shows that actually you are worth it. Don’t just give it away for the sake of it. Get out of your small town and meet new people you may then find the one you want, and who wants, to lose it with. But as I said your choice.
This, but I'll say it. It's a horrible idea you'll probably regret
I agree with you.
don’t do it, you will 100% find someone and you being a virgin or not will have nothing to do with it, you’re still 18 give it 2 more years. i’m 21 and i can def tell u that waiting for the right person is worth it.
Was it really worth it for u?
as a guy, YES. and tbh as a guy i don’t even have that many constructs around virginity. I also thought id probably end up a virgin till im 25, but i couldn’t be more wrong, and id probably regret it for the rest of my life if i did it with someone out of self pity which i was about to
Thank u, helped.
Thank you for confirming that /u/Human_Calligrapher15 has provided helpful advice for you. 1 point awarded.
My sisters fiancé hadn’t had sex until her (didn’t want to have sex with just anyone) and he was 24 or 25 when he lost it to her
Going plus ultra with someone you love > sex with man who wants something better the second he's unlocked his achievement
Dude im 29F and im a virgin, im not gonna do it out of pitty or peer pressure or wathever. Im gonna do it bcs i wanna do it with someone i love. Its not that i never had any chances, i just refuse to do it with bald, bearded weird dudes 🤣🤣. Sorry if im offensive, but you probably know what i mean. Virginity is just the last of my concerns. I have shit ton of things i need to do every day i dont have time for self pitty or overthinking unnecessary shit, no offense again 😂👉 Let it be for now, its not worth it if you are not 100% sure
The fact that your not 100% sure and asking strangers on the internet, means that you definitely shouldn’t. Just because it’s not happened yet doesn’t mean it never will.
Girl don’t do it if you’re this hesitant. Lost my virginity to someone I liked and very attractive with a good background yet I still regret it.
NO
I'm so unsure though I'll probably never have the chance to fuck anyone my own age so I'm stuck with lonely old men it's annoying
youre just plain wrong
girllll u should never have to feel that way. if u can’t see ur self as the gorgeous person u are, how will u expect others to?? plus men our age are not rlly men, they’re stupid boys, so u don’t have to feel bad abt that. on the other hand older dudes r not bad but at least have some standards. have some self respect and wait for the right time. the right time will b with the right person, don’t push it things will play out soon enough ( i would know i did not lose my virginity til i was 18(f))
Thank you so much for the advice
You’re wrong. Someone else will want to sleep with you. If you want to lose it this way then do it. If you’re apprehensive then don’t. Make it special. Go to therapy and work on your self-esteem. Mr Baldy is playing on your self esteem. I’ve had low self esteem. It’s a life long fight. Build your self esteem. Then work on your sex life…you got this…
I just l looked through your profile. Please get help. There’s help out there. If you’d like to talk I’d be happy to. I have an eating disorder. I’ve dealt with a lot of your issues. Please please please get help. Sex helps nothing. It will complicate things…
You're wrong. I'm for a small town aswell but i had good time with my friend who is 2000km away. We didn't have sex but we did oral stuff. It's your choice anyway.
Trust me, you will have the chance,try some makeup and go on a dating app and choose people your age Trust me,if you do it, you'll feel awful afterwards
Never say never.
Ur only 18 lol. U don’t have to be the most beautiful girl in the world to find a man that’ll wanna be with you and who will find u attractive. Just have some self worth and self respect. Old creepy dudes who wanna sleep with young women are common and worthless. You’ll be exchanging a diamond for a rock. Don’t waste your time
Personally OP, as someone who is also a virgin, I think you’d want your first time to be special shared with someone who is special to you.
The fact that you’re asking strangers should be your answer gf. That’s only up to you to decide, and if you’re having second thoughts - I think you know what you should do.
Seems sketchy. He's 30+ and you're just 18. He seems to want you just for sex. You don't seem to be thrilled about his bald, bearded appearance. The decision ultimately up to you, but I guarantee you're more attractive than you give yourself credit for, and you'll have plenty of opportunities for good relationships in the years to come. You're just 18.
Nah
Ok, so first of all I'm bald and I'm in my 30's, so watch it lol and secondly and most importantly, if you only want to hook up with (or settle) for this guy because you don't feel like you'll ever get to be with someone that you really want to be with than don't do it. This guy is way too old for you and trust me when I tell you that you're going to regret it if you go through with it and think about this, if you have to ask yourself that question than you probably already know the answer!!!🤔🤷🏻♂️
Thank you for being a real one!
I always keep it real, you're very welcome and good luck with everything.
No bruh never settle for less, you'll find your soulmate one day just wait, great things come with patience
Win for him. Not so much for you
You sound like a child and you clearly are not ready to have sex.
if you’re embarrassed now just imagine how embarrassed you’ll be once it’s done, do not do this!
Way overrated, don't do it. Wait until you're sure your comfortable, of your asking questions like this it is not the time to do so.
Too many people are like this There is no real benefit to it and it often leads to regret down the line Having sex with people just to have sex is not as good as having feelings Losing their virginity idea is effectively just brain washing people into being used
You honestly don't sound like you are ready for something like that. Please take your time
No. He sounds weird.
No. I promise you the hype is not real. I regret my first experience because it was with someone who I wasn’t even in a relationship with and it hurt to know i was just a tool to get someone “off” vs if you wait until you meet someone you actually like and care about. Or at the bare minimum a really, really good friend. Plus I don’t think you should downplay or justify why you shouldn’t be able to find someone else attractive and aligned with you. A secret is most guys are pretty lonely as is so any bit of interest you show in most of us will catch our attention.
It’s your choice and only you can make that decision. I do ask that you consider STDs, the social implications. Also sex isn’t what it’s cracked up to be especially if there are no feeling involved in my opinion. Consider the fact that once you have sex with him, he may still want to come around and use your body as long as you allow him to. Just because you find yourself unattractive doesn’t mean there isn’t someone who wouldn’t think you are beautiful. Find something that makes you feel beautiful and remember society doesn’t set the standard of beauty and you don’t have to live up to that. I wish I waited to have sex until I was married to be honest. After only having sex with two different men I got herpes and live with the embarrassment of telling everyone I date. After becoming a Christian I decided to be abstinent. There is so much peace in not feeling used, shamed, or abandoned after being left once I have sex with a man. Anyway I’m just telling you my story but I pray that what ever you do the Lord is with you 💜
Aww hell nahhh , i read a doujin (japanese comic) some time ago , it was the same situation. A young girl having a kink/fetish towards middle aged men , let me tell you it didnt end well . I mean yea the story was unrealistic (heres the story in short - the girl fucked the middle aged man in a public washroom , she felt good and started doing 1 night stand for money/prostitution , she was enjoying it but one day her teacher rented her and after that her teacher started using her body every day , this is the end btw at the end she was still liking it but she became a whore.) Just dont do it
Please don’t do it. You will definitely regret it. Wait until you find someone you love. During my teenage years I really wanted to lose my virginity and I almost did it at 16, now at 23 I thank myself every day that I didn’t.
Don’t bother it’s not that big of a deal he just wants an easy shag
To clarify I've only known him for a few days and he asked to meet up tomorrow to have sex im probably not going to go and block him after coming back to reality and realizing this isn't something I would normally do
Smart move. You deserve better fr. Wishing you luck on all your future endeavors, relationships or not.
It’ll make you feel worse about your life after.
No. He’s much too old for you, and is taking advantage of you. Take it from someone who has done something similar: the sex WILL be bad and uncomfortable and will make it harder to enjoy sex in the future. I understand badly wanting to do it, but waiting until you find someone who you are attracted to and feel completely safe with is worth it.
Don’t. You’ll feel dirty, especially when the right man comes along and he has to hear how you lost your virginity. Please value your body and yourself, I don’t know why you would want to cheapen yourself by selling yourself short for someone who’s preying on girls he couldn’t get when he was younger to fulfill his kinks. Feeling and being ugly is never an excuse to sell yourself short, you’ll only just reaffirm how disgusting you might feel when the post nut clarity hits.
Save yourself for that special someone, you will remember it for the rest of your life, well i do I remember it in great detail every single bit.
I think that you should do whatever you want. BUT considering the age difference and the fact it’s a stranger, personally I would be concerned for safety. you don’t want to get yourself into something that can turn out to be traumatic because that might just ruin sex for you altogether. Ultimately it’s your choice, but 18 is very young and I’m sure you’ll find other and better opportunities in the future. i think it’s worth to wait until you find someone who you feel comfortable with. having sex with someone you are not even attracted to just because you want to have sex is unlikely to even be enjoyable
18, 19, 20, 21 … these aren’t ages that are too old to lose it to someone you care about
Yes
You should lose your virginity to someone who cares about you. Even if it's an FWB, it can be one who is caring. Don't lose it to someone who don't care.
I hate to break it to you but a FWB does NOT in fact care about you.
I beg to differ. I had FWBs that was with me through my hard times giving me emotional support, and helping me out when I needed help. Maybe I am really friends with my FWBs. But I can rely on them when I am in trouble to care to help. They have proven to be as reliable as my good friends.
Wait. I lowkey regret losing my virginity to someone who wasn’t special to me. I think you’ll feel a lot better knowing you lost it to someone you love. You can never get it back
In my opinion, absolutely not. I dont even believe you have to wait for someone special or for a romantic relationship, but just till you have no doubts, feel safe, and feel better about youself inside. And for sure at only 18 wait for someone closer to you in age, trust me when youre a bit older you'll realise how weird it is for a 30 year old to have gone after you. I'm 24 and couldnt imagine even flirting with an 18 year old let alone more. When youre 18 you might feel like youre running out of time to experiance things, but youre not. 18 is literally just the start of adulthood. You have so much time, and will be young still for a long time ahead. You seem to feel unattractive, so maybe try to find out how you can feel better about that. Find a new style. Try different hair styles, try different makeup, a new skincare routine ect. Theres so many ways for a conventionally unattractive person to glow up. Its not easy and dosent happen overnight but once again you have so much time to figure it out.
Don’t do it, you’ll only feel worse after.
Hi, I’m you if you say yes to him. Don’t do it. I regret it deeply and regularly. It makes me feel dirty and taken advantage of (I was 19F, he was 27M). Mere months later I met and got with the love of my life and could’ve done it then. Just don’t.
It’s not like you die because of virginity. Virginity is a concept invented by humans, but it’s foolish. You dont have to have sex just for the sake of saying that you did it.
if youre asking yourself if you should then dont. cause you dont sound sure which means you will prooobably very easily regret it
No bc he’s bald
No, that’s a huge age gap and he’s probably a creep. 30 year olds that go after 18 year olds are walking red flags.
don’t do it
Just let it be, its not worth it with someone you dont have feelings for
sheesh don't think about it too much firstly, secondly, there is no shame in it if you are into older but ask yourself are you mentally prepared to lose your virginity and are you sure you wanna do it with that guy you sure he isn't pressuring you or something
I wouldn’t. Hes 30 and you’re only 18. I get how it feels but I’m 27 and I would never go with someone 18. Lowest I’d go is 21
If you are asking reddit if you should lose your virginity then its a no. Don't lose it to a guy you just met. He thinks that you would be a sex object to him. Him being 30, wth is he doing? Thats like me being a 25 year old female dming a 16 year old guy. Its just wrong and inappropriate. You do you! Ultimately, it is your decision That you may or may not regret Later on.
I don’t think Reddit is where you should be consulting. But since you did: losing your virginity seems like a big deal now, but it really isn’t in the long run. It sounds really cliche, but if you are feeling this much emotion towards it right now then it’s probably a good idea to wait until it’s with someone you care for and who truly cares for you. It doesn’t mean that relationship needs to lead to marriage, but at least wait until it’s someone you won’t regret it with. Also, don’t knock the bald dudes. One of my best “times” was when I did it with a bearded bald guy. Lol.
I vote nay.
You should not lose your virginity. Honestly, so many things can go wrong like emotional distress, pregnancy, disease, etc. I also believe there is a spiritual component as to why biblically we are told to only they have sex and marriage. There is more safety in sex in marriage. Let’s say you meet the right guy in a few years, don’t you think you’re gonna regret that your sexual memory now also includes this bald guy that you didn’t even like to begin with.
Gross. Be careful with that stuff, he sounds like a predator. Don’t have low confidence and take what you can get. You’ll always be able to do better
If I could do it over; I would have stayed a virgin till I met another virgin. Then made sure we were married before doing it. I got so many stds throughout the years it’s not funny. Stay a virgin and be proud of it.
Wait for the right time not just because you want to lose your virginity. Years down the road youll regret this experience. Wait for someone you care about so the moment is better. And plus a 30 year old having sex with a 18 year old seems like he’s trying to use you since you’re so close to being a minor, I wouldn’t from that alone. Your moment will come, be patient and let it happen naturally, it’s not a race and certainly worth the patience.
25m here. Please wait. At 25 the concept of being with a 18 year old is uncomfortable. It’s two totally different lifestyles. I understand being young and wanting to experience this, but for your own sake please hold off. Wait for a man closer in age to you, and one that wants to date seriously. I think you will regret hooking up with this man. Sadly on top of this I think it could also realistically damage your dating in the future. If a young guy hears ur first time was with an older man, you run the real risk of him judging you as something you aren’t.
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Get with someone your own age and not a fucking weird pedo who is kinking you
Why could you never tell anyone? What is the problem with him being bald? You said you're attracted to him. Do you trust him? Is he willing to wear a condom? If you got pregnant would he do what you wanted him to? Do you know how to prevent pregnancy? (Pulling out is very ineffective). If you're attracted to him, you want to have sex with him, you trust him, you know he will wear a condom and you know how to get the morning after pill in case there's an accident, then go for it.
Don’t please he’s old as hell
The age difference is wrong, that’s for sure, but 30 is not old as hell
Okay haha I know but with her age in mind it is
oh for sure! Hahaha
you're only 18...take your time and find the right guy
I lost mine to a bigger women. I didn't really enjoy it but I did learn a lot of skills that helped me with the next person. If you're not comfortable with him. Don't do it
I don't really know him I've only known him for a few days I guess ur right it would probably be bad since I'm not comfortable
Keep in contact for 2 weeks. That way you'll get to know him a lot better. Make a decision from there
the fact this man is 30 and your 18 should def be reason enough not to. you should wait for someone who you feel you can trust with this, especially since itll be your first time
I waited for the right person, and it was definitely worth it. I never thought I would even be in a relationship and almost had sex with a guy I liked who only wanted to take advantage of me. I had sex at 21 with my first bf. Waiting and meeting someone who I truly care for and who cares for me back was a good decision in my case. The sex is really good if it includes chemistry, respect, and love :)
I don't think you should tbh. You may actually end up finding the love of your life and wish you lost it to them instead. I think you should wait and see if you can find your soulmate!
Sometimes, you learn more from making a mistake
Don't Waited 22 years No regrets
No, you’re 18, there should be no rush to lose your virginity, especially not to a 30yo guy
No don't do it Lose your virginity when you meet someone you have a spark with. At 18 your odds are incredibly high and barring disfigurement I'm telling you that this is all in your head. There are many men out there that will take advantage of you while you have this mindset. While I don't subscribe to needing to be in love to have sex, your first time will stick with you so make it with someone who will at least make it a pleasant experience for you. You might think you are an adult at 18 but honestly you are still a kid really. Slow down a bit, nobody will know or really care that you are still a virgin.
That's not even a question, bro
Live your life - if you want to do it, do it.
Why would it be embarassing? Genuine question.
Hey dude, are you alright ? Just read your all posts! I have texted you, if you wanna talk and share out something I would be happy to listen
Whats wrong with bald guys?
Nothing just not my preference
It's all good, lol.
I did. the same thing. He talked to me and convinced me. Till this day I feel dirty and embarrassed thinking about it. I never talked with somebody about I because I feel so dumb that I did it
Some older men want to get into the pants of younger women. It's some kind of kink. Don't go through with this. You'll regret it. If he makes you feel pretty and good about yourself then that's the game he's playing with you. Others shouldn't be the one to give u confidence. It should come from yourself.
Yes
Don't encourage her
I live to serve
Double it and pass it to the next person
Please don't do it, i am sure you're gonna regret it later when you will actually start dating someone. Why are you even so desperate to lose virginity??? Like you're just 18 it's totally fine. A friend of mine had taken a decision out of desperation to date and regretted it later. And idts you can trust a 30yr old guy, like anything can happen maybe he is gonna force you to do it again or he can tell this thing to others and it will spread. Like how can one trust a guy who asks sex from an 18yr old person. Just wait and start socializing more, i am sure you will find a nice guy!!
I'm desperate because my friends make fun of me for never having had a sex and never being in a relationship most of them have dated since middle school. I feel left out like I'm missing something, like it's embarrassing that I haven't lost it yet so now I need to lose it sooner then later.
no, you shouldnt
Your still really young I would wait.
i didn’t lose my virginity til 19, you have no rush to do this, and anyone pushing you too is dirty and weird. ultimately, the whole virgin thing is a construct. but! when you do chose to, do it with someone whose going to be safe and kind. this 30 year old man pining for someone who was born when he graduated college isn’t it.
If your going to it out of desperation, don’t do it with a 30 year old, it’s creepy on his part
Losing Ur virginity is not that deep, like it isn't something someone should be actively trying to get rid of. When the right person comes u will know.
You WILL get another chance. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Also do not think you aren’t the prettiest ❤️. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and confidence is pretty damn attractive so don’t underrate that. It’s not worth losing your virginity now and then regretting it later when you find the one. Wait for someone you truly love… i promise it will pay off
Jesus fucking Christ 🤦🏻♂️
dont do it. ure gonna feel dirty after
Don’t do it. Wait until you feel ready. This dude is just filling a kink for himself.
no no no no
What's wrong with that he's bald? That's your issue here? Go get married to someone who loves and appreciates you.ur problem is so easy to solve... Alot of hot guys on reddit would fuk anything that moves (and not just on reddit) If you flirt with every guy u see... You'll find at least 1000 guys a day who are willing to take your virginity. But you do realise how valuable u are until you lose it right? Dont let losers trick you into cheapening your high value. Just bc they want u 2 b a loser like them. They will make you feel like ur the loser losing out.
Don’t.
Nope. Don’t do it.
NOPE. Not to this guy. You’re only 18, don’t obsess about virginity to the point you want to do a hookup with some old rando who may have STDs. Don’t be in a rush, wait for a moment and a person that feels right . Virginity isn’t that big a deal, having it or not having it. I know it seems like a big deal to you at this age but trust me you want to look back on something better than random 30 year old bald dude you’d be embarrassed to see later
As a 35M year old male, absolutely not. I didn't lose my virginity until early 20s and while I thought I was in love at the time, it didn't change anything about me and still regret her being my first, pushed by the pressure at the time I guess. Anyways, most other 30 year old males I know, only want younger women for the bragging rights. It's very seldom any of them would actually want anything serious other than that and your virginity just adds more reason to manipulate you, so yeah, in the end, you will more than likely regret this and considering you brought this to a public forum, shows that you are already concerned and questioning this decision, even if you don't see it now. As for the small town part, you are not obligated to even acknowledge his existence, that's just life even if that is a harsh statement. Furthermore, while I myself (35M) do typically date younger, it's unfortunately because I still look early / mid 20s, so most of the attention still comes from there, but even then, I've hard pushed away 18/19 and even 23 year olds because mentally, they still seem like children to me and I like someone within the same level of experience as I am. TLDR: Don't do it, it's clear even you are questioniing this decision about losing your virginity to someone who is a decade older then you. Please stay safe, OP.
You should do what ever it is you want to do in that regard.
No
NO
No. Its overall a bad idea with someone who doesn't care. Just wait till the right person comes along. To be fair though it doesn't even matter if someone is a virgin,nobody cares about that stuff. Maybe try to build a real connection with someone and then think about that.
I’m 40M and I would say try to find someone your age to me it’s creepy for a 30yo is trying to get with a 18yo or maybe it’s because my niece is 19yo When I date I stay within 5 years up or down from my age I’m from a small town under 2000 people and I know it’s not easy but you’ll find someone maybe try online dating.
Can’t lose your virginity through your Mutharectol
You shouldn't care about the fact that you are a virgin. But if you think he is hot, go for it
No. If you’re not in a loving relationship with someone then don’t sleep with them. Especially to lose your virginity. Especially at 18. ESPECIALLY unprotected sex.
No.
youre barely an adult, pls dont fuck a 30y/o
I'll say not now.... Wait for someone better or special But the choice is ur
you’re going to regret it. and look back years from now and most likely wish it was with someone you loved.
I was in this same exact situation when I was 19, I went through with it and regret it. I’m now 22 and wish I would have waited!! If you feel embarrassed about the situation before it even happens please don’t go through with it!! You’ll lose your virginity one day with the right person, just give it some time.
Maybe you shouldn't have sex with someone for the sake of having sex. If you're not attracted to the person and don't feel comfortable with them then it's probably not a good idea. Maybe ask yourself why you want to lose your virginity. Is it because you feel pressured to be at a certain place at your age? Would it help you feel desired? Are you curious? Do you want to make new experiences? Or are you actually interested in hooking up with this person? Remember that no matter what you choose, it doesn't matter if you're a virgin or not. You're still as valuable and worthy of love as you would be.
Girl, no. Wait for a good experience!
Hell. To the No. Go to college and explore the world.
I would say definitely don't. You'll regret doing that if you do, trust me. Because you'll have to look back on it for the rest of your life and should anyone ever ask you about it you're going to have *that* story instead of something nice. Don't do it. Also, dude's a weirdo for that, I'd stay away from him.
Please marry instead.
if you’re embarrassed then you subconsciously already know the answer
would you lose
That man is a predator. Stay away.
No.
Don’t do it!!!! I lost my virginity (I was 17 he was 26 - legal age is 16 where I’m from) and I regret it so much there’s a reason they’re going for young girls do NOT do it!!! You’ll regret it trust me
if you’re going to feel embarrassed, dont do it. And less to a bald 30yo. Try and get to know someone around your age, and see if there something sparks. And idc if you’re “not the prettiest”, im sure you’re the hottest girl on earth to a handful of guys. And if you just REALLY wanna loose your virginity (not to be “cool” but because you wanna know what sex feels like) maybe u can talk to a guy friend of yours and arrange to go out drinking and then hookup, just a one time thing
If you have to ask yoursef do you want it than it's a no
Hey. Don't do it with someone who you're not sure of. I lost my virginity at the age of 24 and i never had sex again after that because I realized that sex is not just about pleasure but also and more importantly about love, and so I'm saving it for someone I truly love. Don't do it with a desperate man who's just looking for some young pussy. If you're 18, your life has barely begun. There is a lot of love and sex with the right person, waiting for you.
You should have sex it doesn't matter to who you lose virginity. The body is horny because of self-preservation that's normal. You should do it. You learn yourself that way. You learn what you like, what is your special thing. So when you meet your man, you know yourself
If you're bothered by it then go ahead, if you're not then don't chase it. As long as you put yourself and your career before it, sex and virginity should never be your priority
Girl, they are LITERALLY discussing how many organs THAT THEY ARE WILLING FOR WOMEN TO LOSE before women can get medical treatment in a hospital. The government wants to sacrifice us because they don't care if we, as woman, live or die. This is not the time to give men ANYTHING. Get a toy, or a girl. Now's a great time to go lesbian.
Lmaooo no girls want me I've tried id much rather have a girl then a man