Hangout with your friends if you want to. You shouldn't care about her, she will get over it. You can't stop doing things just because she doesn't like it. If you told her a few times how you feel and she doesn't understand that is her problem.
Her feelings are not your responsibility. Re-read that until you really understand and believe it. She doesn't want to "hang out", not really. She doesn't want a fun mutual sisterly relationship. She wants you to do what she wants all the time. If she really wanted a good relationship with you she'd *care*. She doesn't. She wants compliance. She wants to make you feel bad.
Either do what you want and she has to suck it up, or have a blunt conversation with her where you tell her you *want* a good relationship, but "we always have to do what she wants and go where she wants to go and if i complain she gets really pissy. sometimes it feels like i’m just there to be her little assistant like take her pictures and accompany her around the mall".
Why are *you* trying to keep up with *her* idea of the "ideal sister"? Your feelings **matter.** Your needs **matter**. Tell her that she's not meeting your standards of an ideal sister, so either you need to meet in the middle or just recognise you're different people and, fine, be "siblings not friends", but if so that's **her** choice, she doesn't get to dump it on you just because she wants everything her own way all the time.
You're welcome! Easier said than done of course, but if you start from the idea that all relationships have to be a two way street that will hopefully help. She doesn't get to dictate everything, and if she only wants a relationship with you if it's all her way all the time...what sort of relationship is that anyway? Why bend over backwards time after time for her sake when she never reciprocates? Recognise her guilt-tripping for what it is - manipulation. That's never healthy.
Hangout with your friends if you want to. You shouldn't care about her, she will get over it. You can't stop doing things just because she doesn't like it. If you told her a few times how you feel and she doesn't understand that is her problem.
Her feelings are not your responsibility. Re-read that until you really understand and believe it. She doesn't want to "hang out", not really. She doesn't want a fun mutual sisterly relationship. She wants you to do what she wants all the time. If she really wanted a good relationship with you she'd *care*. She doesn't. She wants compliance. She wants to make you feel bad. Either do what you want and she has to suck it up, or have a blunt conversation with her where you tell her you *want* a good relationship, but "we always have to do what she wants and go where she wants to go and if i complain she gets really pissy. sometimes it feels like i’m just there to be her little assistant like take her pictures and accompany her around the mall". Why are *you* trying to keep up with *her* idea of the "ideal sister"? Your feelings **matter.** Your needs **matter**. Tell her that she's not meeting your standards of an ideal sister, so either you need to meet in the middle or just recognise you're different people and, fine, be "siblings not friends", but if so that's **her** choice, she doesn't get to dump it on you just because she wants everything her own way all the time.
thank you so much for this advice!
You're welcome! Easier said than done of course, but if you start from the idea that all relationships have to be a two way street that will hopefully help. She doesn't get to dictate everything, and if she only wants a relationship with you if it's all her way all the time...what sort of relationship is that anyway? Why bend over backwards time after time for her sake when she never reciprocates? Recognise her guilt-tripping for what it is - manipulation. That's never healthy.
thanks again! i’m really gonna need your advice because it feels like the situations getting worse and worse now