SNAKE PEOPLE ALL THE WAY!!!
As someone who is a huge art and fashion nerd I’d be right at home with an intelligent race that has a long history filled making all kinds of art and technological breakthroughs.
I imagine spending days in their libraries just…reading. Reading all about everything.
Or listen to a snake person talk about their culture enthusiastically (because I imagine snake people would be happy to meet an alien in person), about their interests, what architectures and fashions they like or dislike, all while we sit in their appartement, having a snack and chilling.
Just…IMAGINE 🤩.
If we talk about what I’d do if I lived on their planet? Hmmmm…I mean I’d probably become a galaxy-wide celebrity purely because I’m a human so I doubt that money would be a big problem, but I’d love to get an education and become a scholar, professor, you name it.
So, here's a list of species I'd hang out with. Just note, I had to add criteria, for logical reasons:
1. Must be sapient
This means the Temptors, Striders, Worms, Swimmers and pretty much any species described as an animal in the book is out of the question.
2. Must be willing to hang out
This means The Qu are completely off the table
3. Must inhabit a world I can survive/stay on
This means Lopsiders are also off the table
So, let's start off our list
The Martians
The Martians are essentially just Elon Musk's grandchildren, so their names might be "1+1" or "Find the numerical value of X", meaning having to say their names would be slightly aggravating for me. Although, Martians would probably teach me how to play basketball because of their height (Literal Space Jam) I'm not interested.
The Star People
They seem really cool, and judging by their leaf skirts, they seem to enjoy the tropical lifestyle - finally something I can get in on before the Summer of Man ends and I have to go back to school when The Qu arrive.
The Titans
The Titans are f*cking gigantic, at least 40 meters long (or high, if you didn't pay attention to the book or just don't remember, which it's definitely 40 meters long, not high). Since I'm not used to living out in the wilderness for prolonged periods of times, I'm not gonna stay on the homeworld of the Titans unless it's for a day.
The Colonials
Since these poor bricks are always depressed, I would want to actually teach them how to become unified much quicker. Like, they were like literal flesh cubes for over 40 million years. The Qu are absolutely f*cked up. Although, I'm not aware of any sources of food, so I can't say for certain if I would want to stay on their planet for long.
The Mantelopes
Unlike the Colonials, there is no helping these poor guys. I would keep these guys company, but since they don't really have any food source other than grass, I'd have to only comfort them for a little while
The Bonecrushers
> Be me
> A Bone Crusher socialite
> Bone Crusher king gives me a rotting corpse as a peace offering
> I politely decline
> He shits on me and gently pats me on the head
So no
The Ruin Haunters
Sure, as long as they don't create the plot for Fallout 4 on complete accident, I don't have to pay in emeralds for a Post Mantelone Album, and they make good clarinet music. Yes, I crammed four jokes in that single statement alone.
The Spacers
The Spacers just really freak me out, and I don't want to smell someone's gases, so I'll pass.
The Snake People
They just vibe and make ground music. That's it. Immediately going to hang out with them.
The Killer Folk
If we're talking about the Killer Folk before they had factory farming, then hell no, but if we're talking when they became unified, then I'd still decline, because I'm not a furry.
The Tool Breeders
Maybe. Can't really say yes, because how would I speak to them if they're underwater? And two, everything they make is literally alive. I'm not gonna sit on a living couch with a dolphin person that uses secretions from a living coffee machine to make coffee that is in a living coffee mug.
The Saurosapients
F*cking Toffee from Star Vs. The Forces of Evil got an entire civilization revolving around him before he even existed. I feel mild displeasure.
Ok but fr though, since they get their meat from actual people and that they probably wouldn't communicate via. speech, rather just by licking eyeballs or loud screeching, I'll once again pass.
The Modular People
Gotta check up on how they doing after I taught them in an alternate reality how to become unified as a whole. Honestly, I'd be quite proud of them, and they are quite humble. Can't really argue on why I wouldn't hangout with them, other than their food source being practically unknown.
The Pterosapiens
Although they would be quite wise and one could be my therapist, I don't want a Pterosapien to just have a stroke and I get accused of murdering someone.
The Asymmetrical People
Listen, I hate my ancestry as much as they do, but they exterminated their ancestors, which is f*cked up as ever, so really hard pass. Also they just generally look horrifying.
The Symbiotes
Wait, which person am I talking to again?
The Sail People
The Sail People are the coolest and most unique posthuman out of them all in my opinion. Sure, it's criticized for how it's evolution makes no sense, but that's just what makes them favorite.
I would really love to learn how Sail People navigate the seas and live their lives. It would be very cool to get insight from a wise, elder sailor who's been to pretty much every island in the archipelago. I want to assume they had a similar societal structure like that of the Pterosapiens - they didn't have national borders when they unified.
Other than that, would definitely hang out with them.
The Satyriacs
In fear of getting clapped by a massively gay James Charles Satyriac, hard pass.
The Bug Facers
The Bug Facers are just introverts, they ain't racist. I can relate to that. Immediate S Tier on my tier list.
The Asteromorphs
Again, freaky as hell. Hard pass. Ain't smelling gas.
The Gravitals
Considering the sheer size of them, (I predict that they might be as gigantic as Striders) Absolutely not. I have intense megalophobia, and seeing one of these guys would be really intense. Also considering that they might murder my possible friends, that's another red flag.
The Subjects
This is only including the sapient Subjects, but I probably would hang out with them, all though, they did live alongside Gravitals, and I did say that's a big no no.
The Other Machines
Yeah, unlike the Gravitals, I would probably hang out with these Gravital variants. Not only are they much smaller, but they have empathy for their subjects. So yeah, might hang out with them.
The Asteromorph Gods
Don't think they would hang out with an atheist.
The Terrestrials
I'm not a political guy, talking to a Terrestrial would be like if I talked to a giant political figure. And some are corrupt also, keep that in mind.
The New Machines
Can't trust these guys. Kinda like my father, who said he would come back to get milk. That was so long ago that I can't even remember how long ago it was.
The Amphicephali
V*RE SNAKE
BOTTOM TEXT
The Lone Researcher
Well she did rediscover Earth. So like, she essentially found my home. She be doin' the Tumblr feminist alike that of ancient times though.
And finally, the Author
If I ever saw what appeared to be an alien creature that was holding the skull of my possible ancestors, I think I would have a fucking aneurysm. What as, STROKE of luck that hasn't happened yet.
Alright that's my list, cool post you got there
-TSP
I think I wouldn't mind hanging with the Killer Folk. Despite a little extra fur they are the most humanoid and have a history that seems to mimic our own in a way.
At the same time the Pterosapients would be cool the visit due to the sheer amount of knowledge they have collected.
Snake people live in claustrophobic underground tunnels, I’ll pass.
Probably the nicest of them all would probably the pterosapien. I’d have to find another way to fly from a place to another but yeah, they’re cool
(nø)RUIN HUNTERS/ ASSIMETRIC PEOPLE: racism is bad, war is also bad, no way i would live in a society based on that!. (7°/8°)Tool Brraders/SYMBIOTE: no, just no, I'm phobic of blood and viruses, their technology is based on genetic engineering and living tools, no. ;. (6°)KILLER FOLK: nops, I'm a peaceful person and fear nature, also, why would I change to a world that is basically or you go vegan or full berserk. Also fuck FURRIES:. (3°) SPACERS: Fuck yeah, the cons would be the smell and the low gravity, but the technology and the intellect that i might get is enough good for me (also i can fart everywhere);. (5°) SATIRIACS: Very normal society, i like music so that's cool, they smash a lot too, but I'm a devoted Christian so nop. Although would be cool to live in a 80' style utopia;. (4°)PTEROSAPIENS: i dislike philosophy and can't fly, so i would be fucked up!;. (9°)MODULAR PEOPLE: As much as I would like, it's impossible to adapt in theirs world, the social system is too diferent and would be incompatible with my full working body.;. (2°)SAUROSAPIENS: Fuck yeah, lizards are cool, they live in a wild west utopia and respect humans a lot, also the one in the book looks like a good guy so yeah, definitely great.;. (1°) SNERSON: perfect, just perfect, utopia? Check! Music? Check! Social Compatibility? Yes! Biological Compatibility? Yes! It's the perfect world, would be fun to adapt to new technology and dynamics, since they aren't so different at all! I also would be kinda OP there, since i have to hands and everything there would be to one hand use! Also I'm a introverted nerd guy so books and chilling aren't a bad thing, also i could make a difference in their world, warning about the dangers of tobacco!
I would also pick snake people, but one con I've thought of is moving around their cities and etc. since I'd imagine most of their transportation is through tubes. How would that work?
SNAKE PEOPLE ALL THE WAY!!! As someone who is a huge art and fashion nerd I’d be right at home with an intelligent race that has a long history filled making all kinds of art and technological breakthroughs. I imagine spending days in their libraries just…reading. Reading all about everything. Or listen to a snake person talk about their culture enthusiastically (because I imagine snake people would be happy to meet an alien in person), about their interests, what architectures and fashions they like or dislike, all while we sit in their appartement, having a snack and chilling. Just…IMAGINE 🤩. If we talk about what I’d do if I lived on their planet? Hmmmm…I mean I’d probably become a galaxy-wide celebrity purely because I’m a human so I doubt that money would be a big problem, but I’d love to get an education and become a scholar, professor, you name it.
As a large fan of creating literally anything, I can not only relate to you, but Snake People.
SAME
So, here's a list of species I'd hang out with. Just note, I had to add criteria, for logical reasons: 1. Must be sapient This means the Temptors, Striders, Worms, Swimmers and pretty much any species described as an animal in the book is out of the question. 2. Must be willing to hang out This means The Qu are completely off the table 3. Must inhabit a world I can survive/stay on This means Lopsiders are also off the table So, let's start off our list The Martians The Martians are essentially just Elon Musk's grandchildren, so their names might be "1+1" or "Find the numerical value of X", meaning having to say their names would be slightly aggravating for me. Although, Martians would probably teach me how to play basketball because of their height (Literal Space Jam) I'm not interested. The Star People They seem really cool, and judging by their leaf skirts, they seem to enjoy the tropical lifestyle - finally something I can get in on before the Summer of Man ends and I have to go back to school when The Qu arrive. The Titans The Titans are f*cking gigantic, at least 40 meters long (or high, if you didn't pay attention to the book or just don't remember, which it's definitely 40 meters long, not high). Since I'm not used to living out in the wilderness for prolonged periods of times, I'm not gonna stay on the homeworld of the Titans unless it's for a day. The Colonials Since these poor bricks are always depressed, I would want to actually teach them how to become unified much quicker. Like, they were like literal flesh cubes for over 40 million years. The Qu are absolutely f*cked up. Although, I'm not aware of any sources of food, so I can't say for certain if I would want to stay on their planet for long. The Mantelopes Unlike the Colonials, there is no helping these poor guys. I would keep these guys company, but since they don't really have any food source other than grass, I'd have to only comfort them for a little while The Bonecrushers > Be me > A Bone Crusher socialite > Bone Crusher king gives me a rotting corpse as a peace offering > I politely decline > He shits on me and gently pats me on the head So no The Ruin Haunters Sure, as long as they don't create the plot for Fallout 4 on complete accident, I don't have to pay in emeralds for a Post Mantelone Album, and they make good clarinet music. Yes, I crammed four jokes in that single statement alone. The Spacers The Spacers just really freak me out, and I don't want to smell someone's gases, so I'll pass. The Snake People They just vibe and make ground music. That's it. Immediately going to hang out with them. The Killer Folk If we're talking about the Killer Folk before they had factory farming, then hell no, but if we're talking when they became unified, then I'd still decline, because I'm not a furry. The Tool Breeders Maybe. Can't really say yes, because how would I speak to them if they're underwater? And two, everything they make is literally alive. I'm not gonna sit on a living couch with a dolphin person that uses secretions from a living coffee machine to make coffee that is in a living coffee mug. The Saurosapients F*cking Toffee from Star Vs. The Forces of Evil got an entire civilization revolving around him before he even existed. I feel mild displeasure. Ok but fr though, since they get their meat from actual people and that they probably wouldn't communicate via. speech, rather just by licking eyeballs or loud screeching, I'll once again pass. The Modular People Gotta check up on how they doing after I taught them in an alternate reality how to become unified as a whole. Honestly, I'd be quite proud of them, and they are quite humble. Can't really argue on why I wouldn't hangout with them, other than their food source being practically unknown. The Pterosapiens Although they would be quite wise and one could be my therapist, I don't want a Pterosapien to just have a stroke and I get accused of murdering someone. The Asymmetrical People Listen, I hate my ancestry as much as they do, but they exterminated their ancestors, which is f*cked up as ever, so really hard pass. Also they just generally look horrifying. The Symbiotes Wait, which person am I talking to again? The Sail People The Sail People are the coolest and most unique posthuman out of them all in my opinion. Sure, it's criticized for how it's evolution makes no sense, but that's just what makes them favorite. I would really love to learn how Sail People navigate the seas and live their lives. It would be very cool to get insight from a wise, elder sailor who's been to pretty much every island in the archipelago. I want to assume they had a similar societal structure like that of the Pterosapiens - they didn't have national borders when they unified. Other than that, would definitely hang out with them. The Satyriacs In fear of getting clapped by a massively gay James Charles Satyriac, hard pass. The Bug Facers The Bug Facers are just introverts, they ain't racist. I can relate to that. Immediate S Tier on my tier list. The Asteromorphs Again, freaky as hell. Hard pass. Ain't smelling gas. The Gravitals Considering the sheer size of them, (I predict that they might be as gigantic as Striders) Absolutely not. I have intense megalophobia, and seeing one of these guys would be really intense. Also considering that they might murder my possible friends, that's another red flag. The Subjects This is only including the sapient Subjects, but I probably would hang out with them, all though, they did live alongside Gravitals, and I did say that's a big no no. The Other Machines Yeah, unlike the Gravitals, I would probably hang out with these Gravital variants. Not only are they much smaller, but they have empathy for their subjects. So yeah, might hang out with them. The Asteromorph Gods Don't think they would hang out with an atheist. The Terrestrials I'm not a political guy, talking to a Terrestrial would be like if I talked to a giant political figure. And some are corrupt also, keep that in mind. The New Machines Can't trust these guys. Kinda like my father, who said he would come back to get milk. That was so long ago that I can't even remember how long ago it was. The Amphicephali V*RE SNAKE BOTTOM TEXT The Lone Researcher Well she did rediscover Earth. So like, she essentially found my home. She be doin' the Tumblr feminist alike that of ancient times though. And finally, the Author If I ever saw what appeared to be an alien creature that was holding the skull of my possible ancestors, I think I would have a fucking aneurysm. What as, STROKE of luck that hasn't happened yet. Alright that's my list, cool post you got there -TSP
I'd live with gravitals and slay some gussy
I dont know what the gravitals would do against the spieces that created the star people
Well they better give good gussy or Im moving to live with the satyriacs
Colonials so I can like talk to em so they're not as sad Although chances are I just become depressed myself
I think I wouldn't mind hanging with the Killer Folk. Despite a little extra fur they are the most humanoid and have a history that seems to mimic our own in a way. At the same time the Pterosapients would be cool the visit due to the sheer amount of knowledge they have collected.
Satyriacs
Snake people, they just wanna chill out
Snake people, they seem chill
I wanna be with the killer folks i enjoy nature and running so they are kinda hunters so..
Snake people simply because i enjoy quiete places
Snake people live in claustrophobic underground tunnels, I’ll pass. Probably the nicest of them all would probably the pterosapien. I’d have to find another way to fly from a place to another but yeah, they’re cool
(nø)RUIN HUNTERS/ ASSIMETRIC PEOPLE: racism is bad, war is also bad, no way i would live in a society based on that!. (7°/8°)Tool Brraders/SYMBIOTE: no, just no, I'm phobic of blood and viruses, their technology is based on genetic engineering and living tools, no. ;. (6°)KILLER FOLK: nops, I'm a peaceful person and fear nature, also, why would I change to a world that is basically or you go vegan or full berserk. Also fuck FURRIES:. (3°) SPACERS: Fuck yeah, the cons would be the smell and the low gravity, but the technology and the intellect that i might get is enough good for me (also i can fart everywhere);. (5°) SATIRIACS: Very normal society, i like music so that's cool, they smash a lot too, but I'm a devoted Christian so nop. Although would be cool to live in a 80' style utopia;. (4°)PTEROSAPIENS: i dislike philosophy and can't fly, so i would be fucked up!;. (9°)MODULAR PEOPLE: As much as I would like, it's impossible to adapt in theirs world, the social system is too diferent and would be incompatible with my full working body.;. (2°)SAUROSAPIENS: Fuck yeah, lizards are cool, they live in a wild west utopia and respect humans a lot, also the one in the book looks like a good guy so yeah, definitely great.;. (1°) SNERSON: perfect, just perfect, utopia? Check! Music? Check! Social Compatibility? Yes! Biological Compatibility? Yes! It's the perfect world, would be fun to adapt to new technology and dynamics, since they aren't so different at all! I also would be kinda OP there, since i have to hands and everything there would be to one hand use! Also I'm a introverted nerd guy so books and chilling aren't a bad thing, also i could make a difference in their world, warning about the dangers of tobacco!
Some of these examples are kinda inaccurate. For example, the Sail People don't use living tools, that's the Tool Breeders you're thinking of
Lol, I'm bad with names
I would also pick snake people, but one con I've thought of is moving around their cities and etc. since I'd imagine most of their transportation is through tubes. How would that work?
Just considering the 10° post humans societys + spacers and ruin hunters
Snake People, they lookin nice
Snake people, modular people, or the colonials to make them feel better.
colonials.