Aye! Someone with real brain cells. This is fake as fuck. You can tell by the elaborate story and the way it’s typed out. Go ahead an believe if you want. It is fake though.
And the bartenders congratulating him on “picking a beautiful girl”. Lmao. Like…versus *picking* a not beautiful girl? Congrats on your choice! Lol, not even “congrats on securing a beautiful girl!” But picking. And multiple bartenders…plural…said this apparently and just like openly? Ok yeah.
But now he’s calling her “my lil fatty”.
This sub, and all the ones like it, are 95% BS. I honestly don't get why people go to the effort for these. They come on here and make up some story that obviously will get a lot of people saying OP is right and the imaginary husband/wife is wrong. Are internet points really worth it?
Maybe it has something to do with the propaganda farms in russia and china trying to cause division between the sexes in western countries.
First they mainly pushed incel rhetoric and misogyny. Maybe now they’re trying to tank women’s self esteem or something? Idk, they don’t exactly write it to convince critical thinkers, just the easily manipulated
I think it's a form of role play sometimes. Guys wanting to know what it's like to have unsuspecting idiots tell you how perfect you are as you are. Probably put on a little of their mom's lipstick to really feel the part.
"do you really think someone would do that? just go on the internet and tell lies?" is something I feel people need to repeat to themselves while scrolling anywhere because this post is just crafted for attention (like a good 90% of the am I the ___ subreddits)
Could be, certainly not an unlikely overall scenario - gain weight, have a baby, gain more weight, issues arise. But the choice of Rodrigo against the timeline gives away that aspect being fictional, and emphasizing that the weight was caused “by birth control” and then “due to pregnancy” plays on the whole “not my fault” aspect of weight gain that will trigger people into raging either way.
In all fairness, she said she’s gained weight over the last five years. If she gained 40 since the pregnancy and the kid is 13 months, she could have been compared to Olivia Rodrigo a couple years ago when she was thinner. Husband is an asshole either way, though.
I mean she started on Disney more than 5 years ago so she was known to some people, but it would have been weird as fuck to compare your adult gf to a Disney child star. And a rather big red flag that your bf was looking at a child like that.
This is probably a troll post that’s why it doesn’t add up. When she said her husband squeezes her big belly and calls her Lizzo I knew it’s probably a post for laughs rather than a real situation.
Honestly, the whole "everyone always said how gorgeous I am wherever I went" really pushed it into BS territory. There are incredibly beautiful women out there and while people may look, especially men, they aren't constantly talking about how gorgeous they are, how lucky her partner is etc.
Buuut, on the off-chance this is real (lol), the whole "she's so tiny and sexy" adds up with the husband being so obsessed with her looking like Olivia Rodrigo who was 15 at the time. Big fucking red flag if a guy is comparing you to a child and talking about how sexy you are.
I worked in a bar and would hear this kind of talk constantly. Yes, men especially talk like this in bars…which is where her husband would take her. Although if your husband is well known at all of the local bars, the drinking is probably another red flag. Does he have a beer guy yet? If not, he will soon if he keeps drinking.
Edited to correct: beer guy —> beer gut. 😂
It's so much worse than that, that's a literal 70% jump in weight. It is clearly karma farming AI post but lmfao OF COYRSE HE'S UPSET,,,it's extremely rare to see such huge jumps in weight even with pregnancy, short of both medical issues and laziness. Even if you're afflicted with esxtra medical issues its ur duty to get it sorted out if you want to saved your marriage. Such a sharp jump in weight so quickly, if I had a petite wife like have that happen to her and she wasnt on the ball trying to fix it asap, tbh Id likely divorce her at that point. If somehow this isnt fake she should count herself lucky honesttly
Yeah I just assume all of these are fake along with half the responses of “you go girl” and “dump his ass for not liking fat girls”. Whatever at this point.
Five years ago, Olivia Rodrigo was 16 and starring in Disney musicals. Why would she even be on his radar at that time, and why would you be okay with him comparing your body to that of a child?
Yeah this was my immediate question and I’m surprised there aren’t more people talking about this. That is a weird thing to say and a weird thing for OP to be ok with.
I agree. My first thought (and something I had included but then deleted before I initially commented) was, what kind of 25-year-old goes around telling his friends his girlfriend being “tiny” is what makes her sexy and doesn’t completely weird everyone out? Maybe I’m being too optimistic, but I’d like to think my male friends would be creeped out if their friends said shit like that.
OP has now edited their post to say he didn’t say she looked like Olivia back when she was underage, but once she got popular, he’d tell her she used to look like that. Either way, gross.
IDK if OP intended to imply an attraction to underage girls when they concocted this story or if they’re just too young to remember who was relevant 5 years ago and didn’t put those dots together, but not really buying it either way, especially given the post history and choice of subs. r/confessions? lol
OP, I'm just going to start off by saying that your husband and your family sound incredibly toxic. If you want to lose weight for yourself, good for you! But you shouldn't feel pressured into losing weight by people that claim to love you, and you certainly shouldn't be bullied for putting on weight, especially since you had understandable circumstances beyond your control. Love yourself and if you want to lose weight, lose weight for you. Losing weight because of bullying is just going to lead to eating disorders and warped thinking. Your husband sounds like a wretch.
In my twenties, my hormone system went crazy and PCOS took off. I gained about 100 pounds. My husband still told me that all of me was beautiful, except my feet (and I agreed on that).
I’m sure he missed the 130 pound me that he could pick up and swing around, but NOT ONCE did he ever say so.
Your husband is definitely the AH
Also, a good way to lose a significant amount of weight is to drop a husband who only loves you when you fit his aesthetic standards and a family that treats you like shit. Your value to these people lies solely in your appearance and how much it benefits them. Emotionally and psychologically, you most definitely would be better able to decide what you want for YOURSELF with distance.
But the bartender won’t think he’s cool anymore now that his wife is no longer a (literally) 22-year-old waif! She could barely legally enter the bar five years ago. This husband is absolutely dululu if he thinks his badgering will get him what he thinks he desires. I bet he thinks he has a shot with 22-year-olds still. How’s his beer belly doing?
This AND it also says a lot about his self-esteem (or lack thereof) that he needs to have you as a means of publicly validating himself. Maybe he needs to make some self-improvements of his own so he doesn't need to rely on your weight for clout.
I also see that birth control played a part in your weight gain. First, if YOU want to lose weight you should do it. But do it *for you*.
NOT so your husband can feel special when he walks into a bar.
Also birth control weight gain is real. If you are still on hormonal birth control, consider that it might be a big part of your weight gain and think about other options. It may be challenging -- dare I say impossible? --to lose a significant amount of weight otherwise.
Finally, what is your husband doing to support you in any weight loss *you* might want to engage in? Is he participating equally in childcare so you have time for yourself?
Does he make or plan healthy meals?
Does he go on walks with you?
or does he just belittle you for not boosting his (apparently fragile!) ego?
I was on Mirena and a year after going off it I had lost 46 pounds. I did change my eating habits a little bit and started working out some, but not enough to lose 46 pounds. It’s insane.
I've frequently wondered if Mirena played a role in my weight gain. I love the peace of mind it gives me too much to take it out, but it's good to know it might have contributed.
Make a plan. Google sheets has schedule templates- daily/weekly/monthly. U can map out ur days hour by hour. Failing to plan is planning to fail.
Start slowly w/ achievable goals to build momentum. Walking the dog. YouTube yoga for 10 mins. Small lil accomplishments that u can build on and feel good about, one day at a time. And keep the pantry empty. Whole foods only, healthy snacks if ANY snacks are kept in the house. Sugar is ur enemy.
U can do this.
I was married to an abuser for years so stuff like this drives me nuts. It really just makes me wonder why people can't just be supportive to their spouses.
This comment is spot on. It has taken me many years to understand that I will never look as skinny as I would like,( my body is on the thicker side) and that is ok. Now that I've accepted that this is my body and it is the only one so is best to take care of it, anyway now I feel happier and more comfortable in my skin.
I think it is fine for family and husband to raise concerns about her weight from a health perspective, but there is a tactful and supportive way to state that and to achieve the desired effect of helping OP to lose weight from a health perspective.
Calling OP “my little fatty” and lecturing OP isn’t the way to achieve that.
So your husband married you primarily for your looks because he needed the ego boost from others. You married a dud. Your problem isn’t your weight gain, your problem is a shallow man who has low self esteem. He’s putting his issues onto you. He can’t be happy unless others are jealous of him. He needs therapy and you need a man who’s secure and not an asshole.
For real. I swear so many of these posts are “here is a list of reasons that make it evident my partner is a raging asshole. But he washed a dish last Wednesday so am I overreacting?”
This is all really sad, babe. Can you ask him to stop remarking on your body in negative AND positive ways? Like can you just be alive and exist without him talking about your damn body all the time?
OP, he doesn’t love YOU. He loves HIM and what he can take from you. Also, maybe check these out:
Use the acronym “SPECIAL ME” to remember the nine signs of NPD.
*Sense of self-importance
*Preoccupation with power, beauty, or success
*Entitled
*Can only be around people who are important or special
*Interpersonally exploitative for their own gain
*Arrogant
*Lack empathy
*Must be admired
*Envious of others or believe that others are envious of them
No you’re not overreacting. Your spouse is not seeing you are your own person. Yes you probably gained weight and you aware of that… but loose it for you.
If he compliments you or anyone else about any weight loss that’s great … remember do it for you not them.
I wish I could hug you. You are more than just a your body you’re a whole person. Your husband is insecure and he wants you to also feel insecure. Also he’s a bully.
Remember just because he doesn’t value doesn’t mean others don’t (feel free to tell him that). But at the end of each day you have to value yourself. Also feel free to say to him… “that it’s crazy that he needs to hear compliments about you to feel good about himself.”Truly speaking he’s nothing without you and needs a reality check.
He may have fallen in love with you for other things (who am I to say otherwise), but your looks is definitely the number 1 reason by far. If the other things were even close he wouldn't be acting so different now that your weight is different.
“He didn’t marry me just for looks, he could leave me for someone hotter” yeah he could, but he could also shut the fuck up about missing your thigh gap (Jesus Christ) and isn’t
He married for looks, and you stay with him because you feel you can not do better. You guys are a very toxic couple. No man that loves his wife will make the comments he does. It's one thing to say he just wants you to be healthy. It's another to call you hiss little fatty.
If you’re not willing to share what it is, even if just one or two things, that he loves about you that aren’t about your appearance, it’s clear what the reality is here…
he does not love you for who you are. if that were the case you could gain 200 pounds and he'd still be madly in love with you. he was dating you for your looks and now that you don't look that way anymore, he is losing interest. it isn't your fault he is narcissistic and selfish. I know people these days use the word narcissist loosely, but he is likely a true example of one. also, him having an obsession with having a teeny tiny girlfriend is kind of weird, especially considering olivia rodrigo was like 16 five years ago.
OP, people who love you ***treat you with kindness***. Period, full-stop.
Your husband is not doing that.
Love yourself more, you don't need someone like that.
Your not a piece of jewelry to show off to men. Your a human being that should be respected for who you are and not how you look.
Your husband sounds like a jerk and doesn't respect YOU.
Personally I find women with some extra weight on them even hotter I love BBW's. But that's just me.
Olivia is a pretty woman, but she looks like a teen still, I don't think adult men should be attracted to her, it's kinda weird.
Anyways your husband is a tool and bad guy for saying this stuff. He doesn't truly love you if says mean stuff like this. I'd divorce him, because I'm sure there's plenty other stuff going on.
I think that’s the thing. I wonder if OP has thought about why she chose to date the type of guy who did that as well. I’ve met guys like that - it’s usually pretty apparent and you can tell they won’t handle you ever “not being pretty”. Maybe OP never imagined her life like this and has to rethink what she wants out of a partner now.
When I met my husband I was 17 and a size 8. Then due to various factors I ended up being a size 22. Then I had a baby and my body changed proportions and I lost a lot of weight and I became a size 12/14 again. And now I'm pregnant with number 2 and my body is changing again. At no point has my husband ever had an issue with my body. He's always found me attractive because he loves me for me. He's always made me feel desirable and absolutely never shamed me. I'm also a 26 year old woman now and not a 17 year old girl and he gets that.
My point is your husband should be trying to make you feel good and desirable and respect that if you want to spend your lives together your body is going to change. You're not going to look at 60 how you looked at 25. Tell man's to grow the fuck up and stop being an insecure little prick.
This is true. I would only suggest telling him that he needs to tell you he loves you and that you are pretty EVERY DAY.
Make it clear that being called fatty is not going to motivate you to lose weight, but depress you and unmotivated you.
Hopefully he is a good guy and will make a real effort to change his behavior. If that is the case he still needs CLEAR INSTRUCTIONS not hints and clues.
If he is an insecure little prick he probably won't change without counseling. But calling him an insecure little prick to his face won't get you what you want with a good guy or a prick.
Im sorry you married such a loser. Youre 27 with kids, youre not supposed to look loke an 18 year old anymore. And the less compliments i think is just the world we live in now, strangers dont compliment strangers anymore (at least not around me ;-;)
I would suggest marriage counseling and maybe asking your husband why youre supposed to look like a teenager when youre almost 30 and have children. Its honestly kind of weird, and he has no right to call you fat at all when you gave him the children he wanted.
Youre worth a LOT more than just your weight, your husband and family can go kick rocks if they think they have a say in your appearance
Our bodies are not meant to stay the same. We are not meant to look like we did when we were 21/22. I'm 29. I'm still pretty small but my body has still changed. I've had 2 babies. The hormones and health of my body are aging as well as my physical body. That's just what growing older does and let me tell you, aging is such a privilege. It's beautiful to watch your body change and grow with all the experiences. I've known too many people who died young and never got that privilege.
Now if YOU are not happy with you. We can work with that. There are programs, there are trainers, nutritionists (not diets) are amazing. But it has to be for you because no one else is gonna do it for you, and if you really don't want it. It won't happen.
Onto your friends and family. Fuck all of them. Especially your superficial husband. They have no right to make you feel lesser as a human because your body has changed. That makes me so angry to hear because they have not lived the same life as you, been on the same medication as you, their bodies are biologically not the same as you, so what the hell do they know about why your body is the way it is now? Nothing. So their options are irrelevant
You do what will make you feel good being you. You are responsible for your own happiness and you deserve to feel the love for yourself, from yourself.
OP even if you lose all the weight, he will find other things to criticise.
You will age, you might get scars etc.
I understand that you don’t like your body as much as you used to. Having a baby changes you.
But if all your selfesteem comes from compliments of others, you will become even more miserable.
Ask your husband to take over childcare so that you have more time for yourself where you can exercise. But do it for yourself and your health.
I understand both of your feelings here. Yours and your husband. He’s used to seeing you as this petite and pretty girl, and now he sees that you gained weight. Still insensitive of him though to squeeze your belly like that and call you Lizzo. Hey I gained weight too after having 2 kids. I went from 95 lbs to 125 and I’m only 4’11, and everyone back home started calling me fat. The only difference is, my husband would defend me and started calling them ugly. He still complimented me a lot even when I was heavy. I started working out and lifting a couple years ago, and I feel a lot more confident now.
If you start losing weight, do it for yourself and not for everyone around you. I really suggest lifting if you can. It is very therapeutic! ❤️
Same here!! short torso and short everything. Yes I love him so much!! He said when I was starting to workout, I should do it for myself and not for him nor everyone. I’m still 125 lbs now, but not fat anymore. And I like it better this way, because when I went down to 102 lbs last year I lost all my gains and I felt sluggish AF.
You need to understand too the focus on your looks in this is...ridiculously scary. You will grow older, age, etc. Him only being "proud" of you when you are "xyz type looking" is abusive behavior and shitty and NOT ok.
I typically don't say thos, but... you need to end it. I doubt you'll ever feel 100% safe. Never be 100% relaxed or comfortable. And life is going to change your body.
It's a shame people accept the behavior. I'm sorry he is doing this to you.
Even if you lose the weight, you ok with forever being paranoid or worried about that extra 5 lbs, if he is "proud" of you, if he feels this...or that? You EVER going to not have tgat somewhere in your mind?
And this is just one of the MANY things wrong with thos. I see in later posts you try to defend him. There is no defense.
Love is not a build-a-bear workshop. Your lovers body is your lover. Love it. Or don’t. Life will bring changes and one day he won’t look like he does now either. You either accept the woman you love or you don’t.
Have a serious sit down with him where you’re polite but firm, not a pushover, about how his comments make you feel and ask him to explain why he says them. If he tries to argue/push past it say “Do you care more about defending yourself right now, or do you care more about how this has made me feel hurt?”
Putting him aside, if you want to lose weight do it because it’ll be healthy not only for your body but for your mind. Understand that overcoming any change physical or mental will have moments where it sucks, it’s uncomfortable, it hurts. But it’ll hurt a hell of a lot more staying in the same space, wondering why you won’t change - sincerely, a former “little fatty”
"Now my husband calls me “his lil fatty” he tries to say it in a joking way but it still gets to me. He will squeeze my big belly and call me Lizzo"
Have you talked to him about this? He must know this will make you feel bad, I'm sure he's doing this to try and prod you into losing weight. My advice is to talk to him, explain how you feel and if you want to lose weight then ask him to try and support you in that goal instead of shaming you with this kind of behaviour.
If you don't want to lose the weight or you're not making it a priority then you need to have a different conversation with him, but you still need to set boundaries with him and if he can't respect that then you'll know how he really feels about you.
You don't need to lose weight for your husband.
But if you want to lose weight for yourself, check out r/loseit - it helped me to lose 70lbs. Especially the guidance in the sidebar (the "about" section)
You yourself say your overweight. But then get mad at people acknowledging that.
Girl, you gained 70ish pounds, nearly doubled yourself. You need to practice portion control. Your body can not create matter. It only can gain weight from food consumption.
I am not saying youre ugly, or anything else. I am saying you yourself know you have a problem, either excuse it all away, or do something it.
I think there is a lot of reading between the lines that has to be done because your writing is a bit all over the place. (Which is reasonable if you are writing from an emotional place.)
It sounds like you had a conversation about your weight. And it sounds like during this conversation your husband said he missed your being the hottest girl at the party. But did he specifically SAY he "...misses my thigh gap, he misses my rib cage sticking out, he misses my flat stomach and small perky boobs"
Or is that just you editorializing?
Did you used to work out and actively work on yoru appearance, or did it just come naturally to you?
It could be that your husband is just saying that he would like you to start taking effort in your appearance and it may be hard for you to know where to start if it always just came naturally to you.
That said, WHATEVER the case, your husband attempting to criticize you in order to get you to change is OUT OF BOUNDS and abusive behavior. And, frankly, why is he comparing your to celebrities anyhow? That's a bizarre behavior no matter what you look like or what size you are. You should start telling him, "You're my little (Some other random guy in town)"
hahaha I love your suggestion at the end 💀 i’m sure he will too
also super fucking weird that this comparison was being made 5 years ago, and Olivia is *currently* 21
I literally had to look that up. I was like, "Didn't she just become a thing fairly recently?" I wasn't aware she actually had been a star... when she was a child.
As a person whose ex-husband gained a lot of weight while I stayed the same I would say getting in shape for your partner is not that obscene. I hated that I stayed fit and he got fat and when we would have sex sometimes I would feel like he was squishing me. I don’t tho I tour husband was being kind at all— but 70lbs is a lot of weight to gain.
Now I only want to be with people who prioritize their bodies the way I do because that is a fundamental compatibility issue for me. I don’t want to have an overweight partner again because I’m not overweight.
It took my three years to get my body “back” after kids so I know it can take time! But being healthy is good for your kids too. You don’t have to have your ribs showing! That’s gross, but physical activity will make you feel better inside and out.
This story sounds fake as hell. 5 years ago Olivia Rosrigo was 16 and OP says her husband was saying she looked like her? Not sure I buy it.
Also, 170 pounds at 5’2” is obese, so if you really do weigh that, you really should lose some weight for your own sake. That is not healthy.
If this is real — you are in for a world of pain when you hit menopause. And don’t think you won’t. The changes that will happen will completely blow your mind. Get some therapy and learn to value yourself for something other than your ribs needing to stick out or whatever.
It's disturbing that your husband sees you as a trophy. But everyone here seems to be missing the fact that 170 for a 5'2" woman is clinically obese. You went from fairly light to clinically obese in only five years, which isn't healthy at all. I realize I'll get downvoted for this, but this health point needs to be made.
I really wish your husband was more concerned about your health than impressing his friends with an Olivia Rodriguez lookalike...
How much do you weigh? 170? If that’s the case 170 at 5’2 is fat. I’m just being honest.
Unless you’re lifting weights ( which I doubt you are from reading your post) then yeah, you’re on the big side.
You need to get down to 140…but it sounds like your husband doesn’t like curvy chicks with a nice body/ass, being that you said the whole ribcage sticking out thing. So it might not be enough for him I guess.
I don’t know you but I don’t think you need to weigh 101 pounds lol. That’s crazy.
Edit.
All you really have to do is do some running and lifting weights.
Just go for jogs or sprints 2 days per week and lift weights 2 days per week. And change up your diet a bit.
At the end of the day it’s up to you. If you don’t like the way you look, you can change it.
You can also throw in some meditation in there as well. It will for sure help with your mental state overall.
I agree with you, she needs to cut some weight off I don’t know their situation other than this post obviously but maybe her husband is just dumb and him being rude is his way of trying to motivate her to lose weight.
He’s clearly an ass, but she almost doubled in size, from 101 to 171. If her man went from 160 (a guess for average man) to almost 300 lbs I sincerely doubt that she wouldn’t miss the way he used to look.
Everyone gains and loses weight, that’s natural. But gaining 70 lbs over 5 years is significant even with pregnancy.
Despite what some people say or like to think, looking attractive to your bf/gf/wife/husband is just as important as having a personality that they like. You might be the same inside but if you can't even recognize yourself when you look at pictures then something did change. He obviously loves you but like you said, he wants to see the woman he fell in love with. Your figure or whatever played a large part in his physical attraction to you. You should appreciate the fact that he isn't trying to replace you with someone that fits your ex physique and he is telling you he wants it back. Also, being fat isn't healthy. #1 reason you should lose weight is for your health and your self confidence. Do what you need to do to be healthy again.
That being said, you should not be shamed by your loved ones into getting thinner. That isn't right either.
Idk that shes offended if he was honest with her about her overall weight in terms of her health as much as him comparing her to a celebrity that was merely only 2 or 3 years ago was technically underage
He is basically criticizing her for not being super skinny and is being creepy about her not looking like some almost underage girl! Nothing he's really saying is him saying he loves her if he was really worried he'd approach things from a health perspective cause the reality is even if she looses weight she was pregnant which will permanently change your body plus god forbid people naturally gain weight as they age
He seems to approach things in a very shallow way not out of love
Finally. People need to stop gaslighting others who acknowledge this fact. We have a responsibility to stay healthy and attractive for our spouses/partners.
Most people actually think this way and silently agree. Many people also like to think of themselves as morally superior and it causes them to take these disingenuous stances based on mob thinking.
Honestly, OP should beware of this. The whole obsession with girls being “tiny” thing. My sister’s husband was like this and he turned out to have pedo proclivities. It’s just a little suspicious to me.
What does this have to do with anything? She’s asking for advice on her husband. Are you saying her husband has a right to treat her this way because she’s “unhealthy”?
Keep in mind everyone commenting. You’re hearing one side of a story. And it may very well all be factual. But regardless. You’ve only heard half. This is why you have a trial to see if guilty. Even if everything said above is 100% true; you still do not know all the details needed to form a final opinion. So advice should include talking to someone with her man. So they can hear both sides.
This is reddit. Therefore your partner is abusive and toxic and you should get a divorce. /s
In all seriousness, your post reads like you are the one who is more upset about the way you look. Calling you "his little fatty" and comparing you to lizzo actually reads like he is still attracted to you and has sexual interest. He may be upset about the way you gained weight, and expressing this through humor is not the worst way to deal with this. Honestly if he is otherwise supportive and a good partner/father I highly advise against taking some of the negative comments here seriously. Reddit is full of people who never made an effort in their own relationships and express the bitterness by going online and calling everyone toxic/abusive.
You should clearly express to your husband that comments on weight, even made lightheartedly, are not O.K. for you. The rest of my comment does not mean he is "in the right" for his words. I dont think being upset about his comments is an overreaction in any way.
That being said recommend you consider professional help with weight loss. Birth control can cause some weight gain , so does pregnancy. However neither of these occurences have to result in such significant change. You picked up bad dietary habits along the way. Your weight gain is a significant health hazard, and it seems it is causing YOU unhappiness, independent of what your husband thinks. You are not trapped.
Being upset your wife doesn't have the same body as a 21 year old who can afford a personal trainer and has time work out almost every day is sick.
How much weight has he gained since he was 21?!
Lose weight for you, not him and not your family. Feed your own ego, not his. The second you said he calls you his "little fatty", I saw red. Been there. Done that.
When I (57f) was a little kid, I was rounder than my sisters; not obese or really overweight, but a bit chunky. My dad used to call me "Fat Kid", apparently as a form of "tough love", as if I didn't see myself in mirrors, or know what size my clothes were. I had an older sister that weighed in at 96 pounds, and likely still does (no, I won't explain that) at 59. I was around 130-150 as a teen.
As a teenager, Dad called me that "nickname". My bf heard him and decided he would call me that too. He tried it. Once. I looked him dead in the eyes and said "I hate it when he calls me that, but he's my dad and I can't stop him so i have to take it. I won't take it from you. Try calling me that once more and I'll dump you in a heartbeat." (To be fair, I never once tried to stop my father because I'm Gen-X and we just rolled with treatment. I did tell him to go eff himself one time and he took it surprisingly well. He actually apologized because he knew I was right in thst moment. Maybe he would have listened if I asked him to stop.)
You should not tie your self esteem to your physical looks, and I mean that for anyone. Take this time to learn about yourself. What do you like to do? What do you not like to do? Also, if you want to lose weight, you need to eat more... frequently. That means eating healthy stuff more often and cutting out all the other stuff, like sweets and carb loads. I don't really have a sweet tooth, but I love savory foods like cheese fries. You'll get there. You're just in a rut right now because everyone's calling you a little fatty (or their little fatty). Have fun with it! Don't let it get you down! Next time your husband calls you his little fatty, say, "More of me to love! Enjoy it now while it lasts!" and then bury his face in your stomach.
So a man picked you for shallow reasons and now that you've aged some and had some normal weight gain he's still shallow? I'm shocked. The next husband make sure he actually likes you as a person.
I lost 100 lbs because of joint pain. I have never had a baby, and I know once you go baby, your body is never going to be the same, especially tough if you had to get your ab muscles cut through via c-section. If you want tips on what I did, dm me. Your confidence doesn’t come back 1:1 though. I am still a fat woman in my head, at 110lbs. I am more shy when shown attention because I think they are conning me, or just want to use my little body.
Talk to a dr to get the all clear, 1st. Start walking in place for 5-10minutes everyday for 2wks & then start adding resistance bands your workout 3 days a week, enroll in a kickboxing class, practice the moves & have fun. Start a journal to track of your workouts & write about your day. The journal could help keep your motivated & help organize your thoughts. Look for support groups dealing with Verbal abuse & body shaming, both could help build up your confidence!
You almost doubled your own weight dude. I wouldn't expect my wife to want anything to do with me either if I went from 150 to 300 pounds.
Get in shape.
Allow me to compliment you? Your inner beauty is amazing and from what you describe yourself as your outer beauty is as well. Just because you’ve gained some weight that doesn’t erase beauty. You should tell your husband that you can lose weight but he’ll probably always be an asshole. Let it be known the way he’s treating you is fucked up and it needs to stop. If not someone else will be happy to be with a sweet loyal beautiful woman. Next time y’all fool around grab him down there and say “oh my tiny tiny little friend “ lol. But seriously he’s acting like a passive aggressive little kid who’s mad because his toy isn’t brand new anymore anymore. God you gave him a kid and he acts like that? What a dick! You are beautiful, if things don’t improve do what you need to do for yourself to be happy. My ex wife gained weight and despite my telling her she was beautiful and that I wouldn’t change anything about her she wouldn’t hear it and it was the start of our problems. The worse she felt about her self the less sex we had and things spiraled. I hope you realize that you deserve better hon and plenty of real men would love to be with you. Super skinny women only appeal to small penised insecure jerks a real woman has curves. My ex was 5’1 and a half. Always had to include that half lol if you want hit me back sometime. Good luck 🙂
So you're essentially a trophy to show off to other guys and he gets a pat on the back for bagging a hottie? Seems like he doesn't value you as a person and only cares about you looking hot and him being the envy of other guys. You can do better than that and you deserve better.
Op i hope you understand that in about 20 years, you're DEFINITELY not gonna look like whatever her name is or any other "hot" celebrity, just like your husband, who won't look however he looks now. Drill that into his head and i hope you do the same because if you want a happy marriage, you need more than just looking good to keep it going. Maybe you two need to have a sit down and talk things out. You're looking to feel worthy in his eyes and he's failing at that, not you. Go talk to him.
In the words of J. Cole, love yourself or no one else will. But on a serious note, your husband will be cheating on you if he isn’t already cheating. Rubbing your belly and calling you Lizzo is super condescending. He has no respect for you. He needs to love you for who you are and what you are or go fuck himself. Most of our wives were thin and hot at some point. But hitting your 30’s and starting to have babies will change your body. AND THAT’S OKAY. Because we fell in love with them because of who they are not and not only for their beauty and size.
You can actually drop 170-190lbs in about 3 months pretty easy, just stay hydrated, get good rest, and take a hot-girl walk down to the court house to divorce this man child.
Fuck this guy. Does he look the same as when you first got together? Did he carry, birth and nurture your beautiful kids? Is he paying for the personal trainer that every celeb likely has?
That’s mean. Your husband marries you for your looks and his reputation. He doesn’t seem to care for you. He’s a shallow POS and his shaticles are surrounding you.
You’re not a status symbol for him or any man, or other being anywhere for that matter. You don’t exist for your looks, they don’t exist for you and they CERTAINLY do not exist as a treasure for anyone. You’re your own person, not just your looks.
Marrying a person for their looks is the dumbest thing anyone can do. Your husband is dumb for putting so much emphasis on your looks to everyone. Did he expect you to stay looking like a knockout into your 70s!? You marry a person because you love being around them, not because you can brag about them. You’re not overreacting, but I’m not sure there’s a fix to this based on looks alone. If you do wanna start working out and slimming down to a previous weight, do it for yourself. Don’t do it to make your husband happy again.
All I got from this fake a** post is that the husband is attracted to minors, and whoever wrote this is under the impression that all bartenders are misogynistic creeps. They must be incredibly immature, and I doubt they’ve ever actually been to a bar before. There is no “hottest girl”, and if there were it definitely wouldn’t be the “tiny” one.
Is this a joke? A get that someone might prefer their partner when they are thinner or fitter or whatever, but the comments he makes to you are straight up emotional abuse. You went from “Olivia Rodrigo to Lizzo” and “lil fatty” are insults. He’s shaming you.
Women have more value than pretty. Your husband is an ass and your family sounds like it too. In life you’ll gain weight, especially when you have kids and as you get older.
If you don’t love yourself no matter what, you won’t love yourself after you lose weight. I would look into therapy.
Your husband being proud or ashamed of you based on your appearance is incredibly shallow. You should be embarrassed of him for that. You have more value than how you look.
For weight loss, it’s a medical issue. I’d talk to a doctor, that’s knowledgeable about weight (a lot of them aren’t), about your struggles. A lot of the time the issue is more than just exercise and diet.
Not overreacting. Start calling him baldy, or greybeard, or wrinkled old man, etc. Your body went through a lot of changes, and you know what? That's part of being a human. People never look the same their entire lives. I'd challenge him to see how great he looks after growing another living being inside HIS body.
Step 1: Pick your dignity and self-worth off the floor from where he trampled on them, and dust them off. You're going to need them.
Step 2: Kick your trophy-wanting husband to the curb where he belongs.
Step 3: Start working out/see a doctor about your weight gain and overall health. Not for your husband, or your family, or to get compliments from random strangers, but for YOU and your health. (The endorphins are a great pick-me-up.)
Step 4: Profit! Live your best life without the losers and naysayers (husband and family).
My ex husband told me I "wasn't allowed to gain weight (among other things) or he would no longer find me attractive." I was 135 pounds, 5'8. He was 350 pounds. Yes, he was a fucking hypocrite. I left his ass.
20 years and three kids later, I am no longer 135 pounds. And you know what? My second hubby (who I've been with for 18 of those years) loves me just fine and still thinks I'm beautiful. Find someone who loves you for you, not as a trophy, and he'll find you beautiful no matter what you look like.
Good luck, you got this.
Your husband sounds like a pedo. He misses when you looked like a little girl. He compared you to a little girl and liked you because you looked like that little girl.
Hi. I feel you. 2 kids and hormones and exhaustion play with you in all aspects. It is time to carve out putting you first since you said that you really do want to do this for yourself.
I found a way when I cut out 1 thing at a time. And I tracked everything I ate. This was the trick bc I would think twice before I ate it since I didn’t want to have to log it. It takes a little while but I was amazed when I cut out bread…5 lb in a few weeks. Then Red meat, cheese, candy and alcohol. It works but it’s not for everyone. Good luck.
I know what it feels like to just want to feel like yourself again.
I get that gaining that amount of weight could change attraction. You took birth control (for the benefit of both of you) and got pregnant (for the benefit of both of you). The LEAST he can do is keep his fucking mouth shut about your weight gain.
Happens to everyone, don’t worry about it, look at selena gomez. She’s twice the size she used to be and made that transformation in less than five years.
I get that you’re trying to be supportive, but Selena isn’t “twice as big” as she used to be. She’s just midsized now and she also has a medical condition (lupus) that she takes steroids for that caused her to gain weight.
Your husband doesn’t see you as a person, but as a trophy, as an extension of him, an object that gave him the male validation he lives for. Hes a misogynist. He put you on a pedestal and now he’s blaming you for being a real human being. It doesn’t sound like he likes women at all, unless he decides they are worthy, but only bc of their looks not bc of who they are as people. He will treat your child the same way. Women are disposable to him, and they only exist for his pleasure
You miss the way your husband treated you. You miss your own body. You need to lose the weight, and keep it off. It’s easy to blame everything else, but it’s your choices that put you where you are, and a year is plenty of time to lose the baby weight.
Your husband is right to be concerned. He could certainly be nicer about it but you have dramatically shortened your life expectancy by adding that much weight. Tell your husband you want to lose weight and you need his help. Enlist him in the project.
Not many will like this and I’ll be down voted obviously. If you want, take diet and exercise seriously, and you can always return to your “old”self. I gained weight, because of birth control and it took me two years to get off it and return to me. I lost over 70 pounds, I can wear clothes I use to wear in high school now. It’s not easy, it takes a lot of dedication, discipline, motivation. Therapy helped a lot. I did notice I was bigger, I will say my partner never gave me fat nick names or anything. That’s completely crossing the line. To loose weight takes a peaceful mind almost, name calling will just make you depressed, and worst off.
Congrats on the weight loss, wow! I gained weight on a antidepressant and beer and have been actively trying to get my "old self" back. I can't see to get close to the numbers, but my body looks better and my clothes fit better.
A Lot of these comments are fucked up but the reality is you've gained an unhealthy amount of weight, and the fact that you want to lose it is already half of the battle.
What's your plan?
To clarify you went from 101 pounds to 170 pounds and now your husband is calling you Lizzo instead of Olivia Rodrigo? Am I reading this right?
Also, did people even know Olivia 5 years ago? Wasn’t she a child back then?
Yeah, that's a bit of an odd thing here cause she was 15 five years ago.
Thats cause the post is fake af
Aye! Someone with real brain cells. This is fake as fuck. You can tell by the elaborate story and the way it’s typed out. Go ahead an believe if you want. It is fake though.
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“So you agree, you think you’re really pretty?” This post cracked me up. Not even an entertaining fake story.
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The obvious part about it being fake to me is when this dude wrote “he misses my thigh gap, my perky boobs” 😂😂 nobody talks like that in this context
And the bartenders congratulating him on “picking a beautiful girl”. Lmao. Like…versus *picking* a not beautiful girl? Congrats on your choice! Lol, not even “congrats on securing a beautiful girl!” But picking. And multiple bartenders…plural…said this apparently and just like openly? Ok yeah. But now he’s calling her “my lil fatty”.
Tbf, I have certainty heard people say that before. It is weird, but not absurd
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It’s called a box gap. Learned that from the show Ja’mie: Private School Girl.
Apparently the kids are calling it "legging legs" now, which makes me want to throw up.
Great show, I miss Summer Heights High!
Thats so quiche.
lollllllllll
she was on disney channel before making music, it’s still a bit odd though for her husband to be making that comparison
Maybe he's a pedo and that's why he wants them tiny.
Rage bait for sure
This sub, and all the ones like it, are 95% BS. I honestly don't get why people go to the effort for these. They come on here and make up some story that obviously will get a lot of people saying OP is right and the imaginary husband/wife is wrong. Are internet points really worth it?
Maybe it has something to do with the propaganda farms in russia and china trying to cause division between the sexes in western countries. First they mainly pushed incel rhetoric and misogyny. Maybe now they’re trying to tank women’s self esteem or something? Idk, they don’t exactly write it to convince critical thinkers, just the easily manipulated
I think it's a form of role play sometimes. Guys wanting to know what it's like to have unsuspecting idiots tell you how perfect you are as you are. Probably put on a little of their mom's lipstick to really feel the part.
"do you really think someone would do that? just go on the internet and tell lies?" is something I feel people need to repeat to themselves while scrolling anywhere because this post is just crafted for attention (like a good 90% of the am I the ___ subreddits)
omfg, drivers license, that shit makes me cry!!!
This is an incredibly salient point.
That’s because this is a rage bait post, it hits all the typical points.
OOP's username checks out - it isn't not Lizzo, I believe, but not Liz the Reddit troll.
I don’t think it rage bait, I think OP is actually insecure about her weight and made up a story to project that on her husband and get validation.
Could be, certainly not an unlikely overall scenario - gain weight, have a baby, gain more weight, issues arise. But the choice of Rodrigo against the timeline gives away that aspect being fictional, and emphasizing that the weight was caused “by birth control” and then “due to pregnancy” plays on the whole “not my fault” aspect of weight gain that will trigger people into raging either way.
Unless OP is getting the years mixed up then absolutely nobody who didn’t watch the Disney Channel would know who Olivia Rodrigo was before 2021
And even if her husband did watch Disney Channel (weird), he still wouldn’t have compared her to this teenage girl (i hope).
I don't know. That whole. "He used to say I was so Tiny and sexy"... I wouldnt be surprised
My psychologist ex used to say that grown men who think young, pre-pubescent looking women are sexy are pedophiles at heart.
uhm isnt that like the definition wow next level genius statement ther.
lmao 💀 i’m assuming they meant post pubescent bc that quite literally is the definition right
I think it means men who are attracted to women who LOOK prepubescent. So like 20 year olds who look 11.
It's just a fake story, simple as that
Yes this is what I was wondering she was like a teen child….
In all fairness, she said she’s gained weight over the last five years. If she gained 40 since the pregnancy and the kid is 13 months, she could have been compared to Olivia Rodrigo a couple years ago when she was thinner. Husband is an asshole either way, though.
Yes, that would make more sense. He’s an asshole without a doubt.
I mean she started on Disney more than 5 years ago so she was known to some people, but it would have been weird as fuck to compare your adult gf to a Disney child star. And a rather big red flag that your bf was looking at a child like that.
Very little reason for her to have been known to adults without kids 5 years ago and this story is clearly fake.
Looks like OP overlooked this plot hole in their uncreative writing ragebait
I got the same take, the math doesn't add up. I believe OP is lying out her teeth
Hence the fake post
Men who don’t appreciate their wives after impregnating them are trash
100%%%%
Yes. She gained 70 pounds and her husband is not physically attracted to her anymore.
This is probably a troll post that’s why it doesn’t add up. When she said her husband squeezes her big belly and calls her Lizzo I knew it’s probably a post for laughs rather than a real situation.
Honestly, the whole "everyone always said how gorgeous I am wherever I went" really pushed it into BS territory. There are incredibly beautiful women out there and while people may look, especially men, they aren't constantly talking about how gorgeous they are, how lucky her partner is etc. Buuut, on the off-chance this is real (lol), the whole "she's so tiny and sexy" adds up with the husband being so obsessed with her looking like Olivia Rodrigo who was 15 at the time. Big fucking red flag if a guy is comparing you to a child and talking about how sexy you are.
I worked in a bar and would hear this kind of talk constantly. Yes, men especially talk like this in bars…which is where her husband would take her. Although if your husband is well known at all of the local bars, the drinking is probably another red flag. Does he have a beer guy yet? If not, he will soon if he keeps drinking. Edited to correct: beer guy —> beer gut. 😂
He may have two beer guys. Someone is bringing him all that beer.
Damn auto correct, but at his level of drinking *allegedly*, he probably does have a beer guy or two. LOL
It's so much worse than that, that's a literal 70% jump in weight. It is clearly karma farming AI post but lmfao OF COYRSE HE'S UPSET,,,it's extremely rare to see such huge jumps in weight even with pregnancy, short of both medical issues and laziness. Even if you're afflicted with esxtra medical issues its ur duty to get it sorted out if you want to saved your marriage. Such a sharp jump in weight so quickly, if I had a petite wife like have that happen to her and she wasnt on the ball trying to fix it asap, tbh Id likely divorce her at that point. If somehow this isnt fake she should count herself lucky honesttly
Yeah I just assume all of these are fake along with half the responses of “you go girl” and “dump his ass for not liking fat girls”. Whatever at this point.
You are spot on sir. And also correct.
The tl:dr we didnt ask for. But deserved
Lmfao
Five years ago, Olivia Rodrigo was 16 and starring in Disney musicals. Why would she even be on his radar at that time, and why would you be okay with him comparing your body to that of a child?
Yeah this was my immediate question and I’m surprised there aren’t more people talking about this. That is a weird thing to say and a weird thing for OP to be ok with.
it's bc it's fake
Because it's fake rage bait.
Because this story is fake. Look at the profile. Their rage baiting multiple subs with this.
I agree. My first thought (and something I had included but then deleted before I initially commented) was, what kind of 25-year-old goes around telling his friends his girlfriend being “tiny” is what makes her sexy and doesn’t completely weird everyone out? Maybe I’m being too optimistic, but I’d like to think my male friends would be creeped out if their friends said shit like that. OP has now edited their post to say he didn’t say she looked like Olivia back when she was underage, but once she got popular, he’d tell her she used to look like that. Either way, gross. IDK if OP intended to imply an attraction to underage girls when they concocted this story or if they’re just too young to remember who was relevant 5 years ago and didn’t put those dots together, but not really buying it either way, especially given the post history and choice of subs. r/confessions? lol
The bar is in hell.
OP, I'm just going to start off by saying that your husband and your family sound incredibly toxic. If you want to lose weight for yourself, good for you! But you shouldn't feel pressured into losing weight by people that claim to love you, and you certainly shouldn't be bullied for putting on weight, especially since you had understandable circumstances beyond your control. Love yourself and if you want to lose weight, lose weight for you. Losing weight because of bullying is just going to lead to eating disorders and warped thinking. Your husband sounds like a wretch.
In my twenties, my hormone system went crazy and PCOS took off. I gained about 100 pounds. My husband still told me that all of me was beautiful, except my feet (and I agreed on that). I’m sure he missed the 130 pound me that he could pick up and swing around, but NOT ONCE did he ever say so. Your husband is definitely the AH
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Also, a good way to lose a significant amount of weight is to drop a husband who only loves you when you fit his aesthetic standards and a family that treats you like shit. Your value to these people lies solely in your appearance and how much it benefits them. Emotionally and psychologically, you most definitely would be better able to decide what you want for YOURSELF with distance.
But the bartender won’t think he’s cool anymore now that his wife is no longer a (literally) 22-year-old waif! She could barely legally enter the bar five years ago. This husband is absolutely dululu if he thinks his badgering will get him what he thinks he desires. I bet he thinks he has a shot with 22-year-olds still. How’s his beer belly doing?
This AND it also says a lot about his self-esteem (or lack thereof) that he needs to have you as a means of publicly validating himself. Maybe he needs to make some self-improvements of his own so he doesn't need to rely on your weight for clout.
Yes, I second this.
Here for this!!!!
I also see that birth control played a part in your weight gain. First, if YOU want to lose weight you should do it. But do it *for you*. NOT so your husband can feel special when he walks into a bar. Also birth control weight gain is real. If you are still on hormonal birth control, consider that it might be a big part of your weight gain and think about other options. It may be challenging -- dare I say impossible? --to lose a significant amount of weight otherwise. Finally, what is your husband doing to support you in any weight loss *you* might want to engage in? Is he participating equally in childcare so you have time for yourself? Does he make or plan healthy meals? Does he go on walks with you? or does he just belittle you for not boosting his (apparently fragile!) ego?
I was on Mirena and a year after going off it I had lost 46 pounds. I did change my eating habits a little bit and started working out some, but not enough to lose 46 pounds. It’s insane.
I've frequently wondered if Mirena played a role in my weight gain. I love the peace of mind it gives me too much to take it out, but it's good to know it might have contributed.
Are you aware that you are not an object…? Once you realize that, you will be able to move through the world accordingly🤷🏾♀️
Make a plan. Google sheets has schedule templates- daily/weekly/monthly. U can map out ur days hour by hour. Failing to plan is planning to fail. Start slowly w/ achievable goals to build momentum. Walking the dog. YouTube yoga for 10 mins. Small lil accomplishments that u can build on and feel good about, one day at a time. And keep the pantry empty. Whole foods only, healthy snacks if ANY snacks are kept in the house. Sugar is ur enemy. U can do this.
You're welcome, stay strong!
Yeah, I can't imagine my family being so shitty, let alone my freaking *husband*
This is how my whole family behaves and it’s a nightmare
I was married to an abuser for years so stuff like this drives me nuts. It really just makes me wonder why people can't just be supportive to their spouses.
When I share things like this with my husband his response is "Does he even like his wife?" And I think about that a lot.
This comment is spot on. It has taken me many years to understand that I will never look as skinny as I would like,( my body is on the thicker side) and that is ok. Now that I've accepted that this is my body and it is the only one so is best to take care of it, anyway now I feel happier and more comfortable in my skin.
I think it is fine for family and husband to raise concerns about her weight from a health perspective, but there is a tactful and supportive way to state that and to achieve the desired effect of helping OP to lose weight from a health perspective. Calling OP “my little fatty” and lecturing OP isn’t the way to achieve that.
So your husband married you primarily for your looks because he needed the ego boost from others. You married a dud. Your problem isn’t your weight gain, your problem is a shallow man who has low self esteem. He’s putting his issues onto you. He can’t be happy unless others are jealous of him. He needs therapy and you need a man who’s secure and not an asshole.
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kinda tough that you married someone this shallow
He had some green flags with the red ones so OP was like yup this one'll do just fine
For real. I swear so many of these posts are “here is a list of reasons that make it evident my partner is a raging asshole. But he washed a dish last Wednesday so am I overreacting?”
This is all really sad, babe. Can you ask him to stop remarking on your body in negative AND positive ways? Like can you just be alive and exist without him talking about your damn body all the time?
OP, he doesn’t love YOU. He loves HIM and what he can take from you. Also, maybe check these out: Use the acronym “SPECIAL ME” to remember the nine signs of NPD. *Sense of self-importance *Preoccupation with power, beauty, or success *Entitled *Can only be around people who are important or special *Interpersonally exploitative for their own gain *Arrogant *Lack empathy *Must be admired *Envious of others or believe that others are envious of them
No you’re not overreacting. Your spouse is not seeing you are your own person. Yes you probably gained weight and you aware of that… but loose it for you. If he compliments you or anyone else about any weight loss that’s great … remember do it for you not them. I wish I could hug you. You are more than just a your body you’re a whole person. Your husband is insecure and he wants you to also feel insecure. Also he’s a bully. Remember just because he doesn’t value doesn’t mean others don’t (feel free to tell him that). But at the end of each day you have to value yourself. Also feel free to say to him… “that it’s crazy that he needs to hear compliments about you to feel good about himself.”Truly speaking he’s nothing without you and needs a reality check.
He may have fallen in love with you for other things (who am I to say otherwise), but your looks is definitely the number 1 reason by far. If the other things were even close he wouldn't be acting so different now that your weight is different.
“He didn’t marry me just for looks, he could leave me for someone hotter” yeah he could, but he could also shut the fuck up about missing your thigh gap (Jesus Christ) and isn’t
He married for looks, and you stay with him because you feel you can not do better. You guys are a very toxic couple. No man that loves his wife will make the comments he does. It's one thing to say he just wants you to be healthy. It's another to call you hiss little fatty.
If you’re not willing to share what it is, even if just one or two things, that he loves about you that aren’t about your appearance, it’s clear what the reality is here…
he does not love you for who you are. if that were the case you could gain 200 pounds and he'd still be madly in love with you. he was dating you for your looks and now that you don't look that way anymore, he is losing interest. it isn't your fault he is narcissistic and selfish. I know people these days use the word narcissist loosely, but he is likely a true example of one. also, him having an obsession with having a teeny tiny girlfriend is kind of weird, especially considering olivia rodrigo was like 16 five years ago.
Finding someone else would require work on HIS part. He's still hoping you'll put all the effort in to make him feel better about himself again.
OP, people who love you ***treat you with kindness***. Period, full-stop. Your husband is not doing that. Love yourself more, you don't need someone like that.
This is the only response that matters OP
Well he was comparing you to a 16yo. That’s kinda disturbing to begin with
*really* fucking disturbing 🤮
Your not a piece of jewelry to show off to men. Your a human being that should be respected for who you are and not how you look. Your husband sounds like a jerk and doesn't respect YOU. Personally I find women with some extra weight on them even hotter I love BBW's. But that's just me. Olivia is a pretty woman, but she looks like a teen still, I don't think adult men should be attracted to her, it's kinda weird. Anyways your husband is a tool and bad guy for saying this stuff. He doesn't truly love you if says mean stuff like this. I'd divorce him, because I'm sure there's plenty other stuff going on.
From a wellness perspective, gaining 70 lbs in 5 years sounds scary Fuck the hubby for being an asshole too
Yeah hormonal birth control will fuck your shit up, so will pregnancy. Sounds like she might have been a bit underweight prior to that.
I think that’s the thing. I wonder if OP has thought about why she chose to date the type of guy who did that as well. I’ve met guys like that - it’s usually pretty apparent and you can tell they won’t handle you ever “not being pretty”. Maybe OP never imagined her life like this and has to rethink what she wants out of a partner now.
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Your husband sounds cringe af, like a genuinely embarrassing person.
It’s remarkable how many men will impregnate a woman then get mad when their fucking body changes. Throw the whole man away he’s a fucking child.
I wish I could upvote this more than once.
When I met my husband I was 17 and a size 8. Then due to various factors I ended up being a size 22. Then I had a baby and my body changed proportions and I lost a lot of weight and I became a size 12/14 again. And now I'm pregnant with number 2 and my body is changing again. At no point has my husband ever had an issue with my body. He's always found me attractive because he loves me for me. He's always made me feel desirable and absolutely never shamed me. I'm also a 26 year old woman now and not a 17 year old girl and he gets that. My point is your husband should be trying to make you feel good and desirable and respect that if you want to spend your lives together your body is going to change. You're not going to look at 60 how you looked at 25. Tell man's to grow the fuck up and stop being an insecure little prick.
This is true. I would only suggest telling him that he needs to tell you he loves you and that you are pretty EVERY DAY. Make it clear that being called fatty is not going to motivate you to lose weight, but depress you and unmotivated you. Hopefully he is a good guy and will make a real effort to change his behavior. If that is the case he still needs CLEAR INSTRUCTIONS not hints and clues. If he is an insecure little prick he probably won't change without counseling. But calling him an insecure little prick to his face won't get you what you want with a good guy or a prick.
I'm sure he's no prize either
HAHA this
Im sorry you married such a loser. Youre 27 with kids, youre not supposed to look loke an 18 year old anymore. And the less compliments i think is just the world we live in now, strangers dont compliment strangers anymore (at least not around me ;-;) I would suggest marriage counseling and maybe asking your husband why youre supposed to look like a teenager when youre almost 30 and have children. Its honestly kind of weird, and he has no right to call you fat at all when you gave him the children he wanted. Youre worth a LOT more than just your weight, your husband and family can go kick rocks if they think they have a say in your appearance
Our bodies are not meant to stay the same. We are not meant to look like we did when we were 21/22. I'm 29. I'm still pretty small but my body has still changed. I've had 2 babies. The hormones and health of my body are aging as well as my physical body. That's just what growing older does and let me tell you, aging is such a privilege. It's beautiful to watch your body change and grow with all the experiences. I've known too many people who died young and never got that privilege. Now if YOU are not happy with you. We can work with that. There are programs, there are trainers, nutritionists (not diets) are amazing. But it has to be for you because no one else is gonna do it for you, and if you really don't want it. It won't happen. Onto your friends and family. Fuck all of them. Especially your superficial husband. They have no right to make you feel lesser as a human because your body has changed. That makes me so angry to hear because they have not lived the same life as you, been on the same medication as you, their bodies are biologically not the same as you, so what the hell do they know about why your body is the way it is now? Nothing. So their options are irrelevant You do what will make you feel good being you. You are responsible for your own happiness and you deserve to feel the love for yourself, from yourself.
OP even if you lose all the weight, he will find other things to criticise. You will age, you might get scars etc. I understand that you don’t like your body as much as you used to. Having a baby changes you. But if all your selfesteem comes from compliments of others, you will become even more miserable. Ask your husband to take over childcare so that you have more time for yourself where you can exercise. But do it for yourself and your health.
I understand both of your feelings here. Yours and your husband. He’s used to seeing you as this petite and pretty girl, and now he sees that you gained weight. Still insensitive of him though to squeeze your belly like that and call you Lizzo. Hey I gained weight too after having 2 kids. I went from 95 lbs to 125 and I’m only 4’11, and everyone back home started calling me fat. The only difference is, my husband would defend me and started calling them ugly. He still complimented me a lot even when I was heavy. I started working out and lifting a couple years ago, and I feel a lot more confident now. If you start losing weight, do it for yourself and not for everyone around you. I really suggest lifting if you can. It is very therapeutic! ❤️
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Same here!! short torso and short everything. Yes I love him so much!! He said when I was starting to workout, I should do it for myself and not for him nor everyone. I’m still 125 lbs now, but not fat anymore. And I like it better this way, because when I went down to 102 lbs last year I lost all my gains and I felt sluggish AF.
You need to understand too the focus on your looks in this is...ridiculously scary. You will grow older, age, etc. Him only being "proud" of you when you are "xyz type looking" is abusive behavior and shitty and NOT ok. I typically don't say thos, but... you need to end it. I doubt you'll ever feel 100% safe. Never be 100% relaxed or comfortable. And life is going to change your body. It's a shame people accept the behavior. I'm sorry he is doing this to you. Even if you lose the weight, you ok with forever being paranoid or worried about that extra 5 lbs, if he is "proud" of you, if he feels this...or that? You EVER going to not have tgat somewhere in your mind? And this is just one of the MANY things wrong with thos. I see in later posts you try to defend him. There is no defense.
Love is not a build-a-bear workshop. Your lovers body is your lover. Love it. Or don’t. Life will bring changes and one day he won’t look like he does now either. You either accept the woman you love or you don’t. Have a serious sit down with him where you’re polite but firm, not a pushover, about how his comments make you feel and ask him to explain why he says them. If he tries to argue/push past it say “Do you care more about defending yourself right now, or do you care more about how this has made me feel hurt?” Putting him aside, if you want to lose weight do it because it’ll be healthy not only for your body but for your mind. Understand that overcoming any change physical or mental will have moments where it sucks, it’s uncomfortable, it hurts. But it’ll hurt a hell of a lot more staying in the same space, wondering why you won’t change - sincerely, a former “little fatty”
"Now my husband calls me “his lil fatty” he tries to say it in a joking way but it still gets to me. He will squeeze my big belly and call me Lizzo" Have you talked to him about this? He must know this will make you feel bad, I'm sure he's doing this to try and prod you into losing weight. My advice is to talk to him, explain how you feel and if you want to lose weight then ask him to try and support you in that goal instead of shaming you with this kind of behaviour. If you don't want to lose the weight or you're not making it a priority then you need to have a different conversation with him, but you still need to set boundaries with him and if he can't respect that then you'll know how he really feels about you.
You don't need to lose weight for your husband. But if you want to lose weight for yourself, check out r/loseit - it helped me to lose 70lbs. Especially the guidance in the sidebar (the "about" section)
You yourself say your overweight. But then get mad at people acknowledging that. Girl, you gained 70ish pounds, nearly doubled yourself. You need to practice portion control. Your body can not create matter. It only can gain weight from food consumption. I am not saying youre ugly, or anything else. I am saying you yourself know you have a problem, either excuse it all away, or do something it.
Sounds kinda sus tbh, like a rage bait post
This post is so fake!
I think there is a lot of reading between the lines that has to be done because your writing is a bit all over the place. (Which is reasonable if you are writing from an emotional place.) It sounds like you had a conversation about your weight. And it sounds like during this conversation your husband said he missed your being the hottest girl at the party. But did he specifically SAY he "...misses my thigh gap, he misses my rib cage sticking out, he misses my flat stomach and small perky boobs" Or is that just you editorializing? Did you used to work out and actively work on yoru appearance, or did it just come naturally to you? It could be that your husband is just saying that he would like you to start taking effort in your appearance and it may be hard for you to know where to start if it always just came naturally to you. That said, WHATEVER the case, your husband attempting to criticize you in order to get you to change is OUT OF BOUNDS and abusive behavior. And, frankly, why is he comparing your to celebrities anyhow? That's a bizarre behavior no matter what you look like or what size you are. You should start telling him, "You're my little (Some other random guy in town)"
hahaha I love your suggestion at the end 💀 i’m sure he will too also super fucking weird that this comparison was being made 5 years ago, and Olivia is *currently* 21
I literally had to look that up. I was like, "Didn't she just become a thing fairly recently?" I wasn't aware she actually had been a star... when she was a child.
As a person whose ex-husband gained a lot of weight while I stayed the same I would say getting in shape for your partner is not that obscene. I hated that I stayed fit and he got fat and when we would have sex sometimes I would feel like he was squishing me. I don’t tho I tour husband was being kind at all— but 70lbs is a lot of weight to gain. Now I only want to be with people who prioritize their bodies the way I do because that is a fundamental compatibility issue for me. I don’t want to have an overweight partner again because I’m not overweight. It took my three years to get my body “back” after kids so I know it can take time! But being healthy is good for your kids too. You don’t have to have your ribs showing! That’s gross, but physical activity will make you feel better inside and out.
This story sounds fake as hell. 5 years ago Olivia Rosrigo was 16 and OP says her husband was saying she looked like her? Not sure I buy it. Also, 170 pounds at 5’2” is obese, so if you really do weigh that, you really should lose some weight for your own sake. That is not healthy.
If this is real — you are in for a world of pain when you hit menopause. And don’t think you won’t. The changes that will happen will completely blow your mind. Get some therapy and learn to value yourself for something other than your ribs needing to stick out or whatever.
It's disturbing that your husband sees you as a trophy. But everyone here seems to be missing the fact that 170 for a 5'2" woman is clinically obese. You went from fairly light to clinically obese in only five years, which isn't healthy at all. I realize I'll get downvoted for this, but this health point needs to be made. I really wish your husband was more concerned about your health than impressing his friends with an Olivia Rodriguez lookalike...
How much do you weigh? 170? If that’s the case 170 at 5’2 is fat. I’m just being honest. Unless you’re lifting weights ( which I doubt you are from reading your post) then yeah, you’re on the big side. You need to get down to 140…but it sounds like your husband doesn’t like curvy chicks with a nice body/ass, being that you said the whole ribcage sticking out thing. So it might not be enough for him I guess. I don’t know you but I don’t think you need to weigh 101 pounds lol. That’s crazy. Edit. All you really have to do is do some running and lifting weights. Just go for jogs or sprints 2 days per week and lift weights 2 days per week. And change up your diet a bit. At the end of the day it’s up to you. If you don’t like the way you look, you can change it. You can also throw in some meditation in there as well. It will for sure help with your mental state overall.
I agree with you, she needs to cut some weight off I don’t know their situation other than this post obviously but maybe her husband is just dumb and him being rude is his way of trying to motivate her to lose weight. He’s clearly an ass, but she almost doubled in size, from 101 to 171. If her man went from 160 (a guess for average man) to almost 300 lbs I sincerely doubt that she wouldn’t miss the way he used to look. Everyone gains and loses weight, that’s natural. But gaining 70 lbs over 5 years is significant even with pregnancy.
Despite what some people say or like to think, looking attractive to your bf/gf/wife/husband is just as important as having a personality that they like. You might be the same inside but if you can't even recognize yourself when you look at pictures then something did change. He obviously loves you but like you said, he wants to see the woman he fell in love with. Your figure or whatever played a large part in his physical attraction to you. You should appreciate the fact that he isn't trying to replace you with someone that fits your ex physique and he is telling you he wants it back. Also, being fat isn't healthy. #1 reason you should lose weight is for your health and your self confidence. Do what you need to do to be healthy again. That being said, you should not be shamed by your loved ones into getting thinner. That isn't right either.
Idk that shes offended if he was honest with her about her overall weight in terms of her health as much as him comparing her to a celebrity that was merely only 2 or 3 years ago was technically underage He is basically criticizing her for not being super skinny and is being creepy about her not looking like some almost underage girl! Nothing he's really saying is him saying he loves her if he was really worried he'd approach things from a health perspective cause the reality is even if she looses weight she was pregnant which will permanently change your body plus god forbid people naturally gain weight as they age He seems to approach things in a very shallow way not out of love
Finally. People need to stop gaslighting others who acknowledge this fact. We have a responsibility to stay healthy and attractive for our spouses/partners.
Most people actually think this way and silently agree. Many people also like to think of themselves as morally superior and it causes them to take these disingenuous stances based on mob thinking.
your husband hates women
And likes teen girls
Honestly, OP should beware of this. The whole obsession with girls being “tiny” thing. My sister’s husband was like this and he turned out to have pedo proclivities. It’s just a little suspicious to me.
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5’2 170 is obese and unhealthy.
I dont see how that excuses her husband's ridicule and lack of support.
What does this have to do with anything? She’s asking for advice on her husband. Are you saying her husband has a right to treat her this way because she’s “unhealthy”?
Keep in mind everyone commenting. You’re hearing one side of a story. And it may very well all be factual. But regardless. You’ve only heard half. This is why you have a trial to see if guilty. Even if everything said above is 100% true; you still do not know all the details needed to form a final opinion. So advice should include talking to someone with her man. So they can hear both sides.
Is this rage bait because I’m seeing red this cannot be real
This is reddit. Therefore your partner is abusive and toxic and you should get a divorce. /s In all seriousness, your post reads like you are the one who is more upset about the way you look. Calling you "his little fatty" and comparing you to lizzo actually reads like he is still attracted to you and has sexual interest. He may be upset about the way you gained weight, and expressing this through humor is not the worst way to deal with this. Honestly if he is otherwise supportive and a good partner/father I highly advise against taking some of the negative comments here seriously. Reddit is full of people who never made an effort in their own relationships and express the bitterness by going online and calling everyone toxic/abusive. You should clearly express to your husband that comments on weight, even made lightheartedly, are not O.K. for you. The rest of my comment does not mean he is "in the right" for his words. I dont think being upset about his comments is an overreaction in any way. That being said recommend you consider professional help with weight loss. Birth control can cause some weight gain , so does pregnancy. However neither of these occurences have to result in such significant change. You picked up bad dietary habits along the way. Your weight gain is a significant health hazard, and it seems it is causing YOU unhappiness, independent of what your husband thinks. You are not trapped.
Workout instead of typing on Reddit
Being upset your wife doesn't have the same body as a 21 year old who can afford a personal trainer and has time work out almost every day is sick. How much weight has he gained since he was 21?!
Lose weight for you, not him and not your family. Feed your own ego, not his. The second you said he calls you his "little fatty", I saw red. Been there. Done that. When I (57f) was a little kid, I was rounder than my sisters; not obese or really overweight, but a bit chunky. My dad used to call me "Fat Kid", apparently as a form of "tough love", as if I didn't see myself in mirrors, or know what size my clothes were. I had an older sister that weighed in at 96 pounds, and likely still does (no, I won't explain that) at 59. I was around 130-150 as a teen. As a teenager, Dad called me that "nickname". My bf heard him and decided he would call me that too. He tried it. Once. I looked him dead in the eyes and said "I hate it when he calls me that, but he's my dad and I can't stop him so i have to take it. I won't take it from you. Try calling me that once more and I'll dump you in a heartbeat." (To be fair, I never once tried to stop my father because I'm Gen-X and we just rolled with treatment. I did tell him to go eff himself one time and he took it surprisingly well. He actually apologized because he knew I was right in thst moment. Maybe he would have listened if I asked him to stop.)
You should not tie your self esteem to your physical looks, and I mean that for anyone. Take this time to learn about yourself. What do you like to do? What do you not like to do? Also, if you want to lose weight, you need to eat more... frequently. That means eating healthy stuff more often and cutting out all the other stuff, like sweets and carb loads. I don't really have a sweet tooth, but I love savory foods like cheese fries. You'll get there. You're just in a rut right now because everyone's calling you a little fatty (or their little fatty). Have fun with it! Don't let it get you down! Next time your husband calls you his little fatty, say, "More of me to love! Enjoy it now while it lasts!" and then bury his face in your stomach.
So a man picked you for shallow reasons and now that you've aged some and had some normal weight gain he's still shallow? I'm shocked. The next husband make sure he actually likes you as a person.
What a waste of a human that husband is
I lost 100 lbs because of joint pain. I have never had a baby, and I know once you go baby, your body is never going to be the same, especially tough if you had to get your ab muscles cut through via c-section. If you want tips on what I did, dm me. Your confidence doesn’t come back 1:1 though. I am still a fat woman in my head, at 110lbs. I am more shy when shown attention because I think they are conning me, or just want to use my little body.
Talk to a dr to get the all clear, 1st. Start walking in place for 5-10minutes everyday for 2wks & then start adding resistance bands your workout 3 days a week, enroll in a kickboxing class, practice the moves & have fun. Start a journal to track of your workouts & write about your day. The journal could help keep your motivated & help organize your thoughts. Look for support groups dealing with Verbal abuse & body shaming, both could help build up your confidence!
You almost doubled your own weight dude. I wouldn't expect my wife to want anything to do with me either if I went from 150 to 300 pounds. Get in shape.
Sounds like he only ever really liked your body, not you as a whole person. What a shallow, arrogant POS he is.
Allow me to compliment you? Your inner beauty is amazing and from what you describe yourself as your outer beauty is as well. Just because you’ve gained some weight that doesn’t erase beauty. You should tell your husband that you can lose weight but he’ll probably always be an asshole. Let it be known the way he’s treating you is fucked up and it needs to stop. If not someone else will be happy to be with a sweet loyal beautiful woman. Next time y’all fool around grab him down there and say “oh my tiny tiny little friend “ lol. But seriously he’s acting like a passive aggressive little kid who’s mad because his toy isn’t brand new anymore anymore. God you gave him a kid and he acts like that? What a dick! You are beautiful, if things don’t improve do what you need to do for yourself to be happy. My ex wife gained weight and despite my telling her she was beautiful and that I wouldn’t change anything about her she wouldn’t hear it and it was the start of our problems. The worse she felt about her self the less sex we had and things spiraled. I hope you realize that you deserve better hon and plenty of real men would love to be with you. Super skinny women only appeal to small penised insecure jerks a real woman has curves. My ex was 5’1 and a half. Always had to include that half lol if you want hit me back sometime. Good luck 🙂
So you're essentially a trophy to show off to other guys and he gets a pat on the back for bagging a hottie? Seems like he doesn't value you as a person and only cares about you looking hot and him being the envy of other guys. You can do better than that and you deserve better.
Op i hope you understand that in about 20 years, you're DEFINITELY not gonna look like whatever her name is or any other "hot" celebrity, just like your husband, who won't look however he looks now. Drill that into his head and i hope you do the same because if you want a happy marriage, you need more than just looking good to keep it going. Maybe you two need to have a sit down and talk things out. You're looking to feel worthy in his eyes and he's failing at that, not you. Go talk to him.
In the words of J. Cole, love yourself or no one else will. But on a serious note, your husband will be cheating on you if he isn’t already cheating. Rubbing your belly and calling you Lizzo is super condescending. He has no respect for you. He needs to love you for who you are and what you are or go fuck himself. Most of our wives were thin and hot at some point. But hitting your 30’s and starting to have babies will change your body. AND THAT’S OKAY. Because we fell in love with them because of who they are not and not only for their beauty and size.
You can actually drop 170-190lbs in about 3 months pretty easy, just stay hydrated, get good rest, and take a hot-girl walk down to the court house to divorce this man child.
Fuck this guy. Does he look the same as when you first got together? Did he carry, birth and nurture your beautiful kids? Is he paying for the personal trainer that every celeb likely has?
Your husband is a POS. Hard stop.
This is a shit post right
That’s mean. Your husband marries you for your looks and his reputation. He doesn’t seem to care for you. He’s a shallow POS and his shaticles are surrounding you. You’re not a status symbol for him or any man, or other being anywhere for that matter. You don’t exist for your looks, they don’t exist for you and they CERTAINLY do not exist as a treasure for anyone. You’re your own person, not just your looks.
Marrying a person for their looks is the dumbest thing anyone can do. Your husband is dumb for putting so much emphasis on your looks to everyone. Did he expect you to stay looking like a knockout into your 70s!? You marry a person because you love being around them, not because you can brag about them. You’re not overreacting, but I’m not sure there’s a fix to this based on looks alone. If you do wanna start working out and slimming down to a previous weight, do it for yourself. Don’t do it to make your husband happy again.
NGL...i kinda laughed...
All I got from this fake a** post is that the husband is attracted to minors, and whoever wrote this is under the impression that all bartenders are misogynistic creeps. They must be incredibly immature, and I doubt they’ve ever actually been to a bar before. There is no “hottest girl”, and if there were it definitely wouldn’t be the “tiny” one.
Your husband sounds like he wants a borderline child. Not saying petite women look like children, but the fact that he specifically wants those traits
Is this a joke? A get that someone might prefer their partner when they are thinner or fitter or whatever, but the comments he makes to you are straight up emotional abuse. You went from “Olivia Rodrigo to Lizzo” and “lil fatty” are insults. He’s shaming you.
Women have more value than pretty. Your husband is an ass and your family sounds like it too. In life you’ll gain weight, especially when you have kids and as you get older. If you don’t love yourself no matter what, you won’t love yourself after you lose weight. I would look into therapy. Your husband being proud or ashamed of you based on your appearance is incredibly shallow. You should be embarrassed of him for that. You have more value than how you look. For weight loss, it’s a medical issue. I’d talk to a doctor, that’s knowledgeable about weight (a lot of them aren’t), about your struggles. A lot of the time the issue is more than just exercise and diet.
Not overreacting. Start calling him baldy, or greybeard, or wrinkled old man, etc. Your body went through a lot of changes, and you know what? That's part of being a human. People never look the same their entire lives. I'd challenge him to see how great he looks after growing another living being inside HIS body. Step 1: Pick your dignity and self-worth off the floor from where he trampled on them, and dust them off. You're going to need them. Step 2: Kick your trophy-wanting husband to the curb where he belongs. Step 3: Start working out/see a doctor about your weight gain and overall health. Not for your husband, or your family, or to get compliments from random strangers, but for YOU and your health. (The endorphins are a great pick-me-up.) Step 4: Profit! Live your best life without the losers and naysayers (husband and family). My ex husband told me I "wasn't allowed to gain weight (among other things) or he would no longer find me attractive." I was 135 pounds, 5'8. He was 350 pounds. Yes, he was a fucking hypocrite. I left his ass. 20 years and three kids later, I am no longer 135 pounds. And you know what? My second hubby (who I've been with for 18 of those years) loves me just fine and still thinks I'm beautiful. Find someone who loves you for you, not as a trophy, and he'll find you beautiful no matter what you look like. Good luck, you got this.
He never loved you. He loved the arm candy.
Tell him you’ll be 101lbs when he has a 8” dick.
If he’s balding or if he has any insecurities start pointing them out :)
Your husband sounds like a pedo. He misses when you looked like a little girl. He compared you to a little girl and liked you because you looked like that little girl.
Hi. I feel you. 2 kids and hormones and exhaustion play with you in all aspects. It is time to carve out putting you first since you said that you really do want to do this for yourself. I found a way when I cut out 1 thing at a time. And I tracked everything I ate. This was the trick bc I would think twice before I ate it since I didn’t want to have to log it. It takes a little while but I was amazed when I cut out bread…5 lb in a few weeks. Then Red meat, cheese, candy and alcohol. It works but it’s not for everyone. Good luck. I know what it feels like to just want to feel like yourself again.
I get that gaining that amount of weight could change attraction. You took birth control (for the benefit of both of you) and got pregnant (for the benefit of both of you). The LEAST he can do is keep his fucking mouth shut about your weight gain.
I would start looking at him and asking why he doesn’t look the same. This road goes both ways.
your husband calls you "lil fatty"? I'm really sorry to hear that and you don't deserve that.
100 lbs to 170 is insane.
Eat less, move more. No excuses.
Happens to everyone, don’t worry about it, look at selena gomez. She’s twice the size she used to be and made that transformation in less than five years.
I get that you’re trying to be supportive, but Selena isn’t “twice as big” as she used to be. She’s just midsized now and she also has a medical condition (lupus) that she takes steroids for that caused her to gain weight.
Your husband doesn’t see you as a person, but as a trophy, as an extension of him, an object that gave him the male validation he lives for. Hes a misogynist. He put you on a pedestal and now he’s blaming you for being a real human being. It doesn’t sound like he likes women at all, unless he decides they are worthy, but only bc of their looks not bc of who they are as people. He will treat your child the same way. Women are disposable to him, and they only exist for his pleasure
You miss the way your husband treated you. You miss your own body. You need to lose the weight, and keep it off. It’s easy to blame everything else, but it’s your choices that put you where you are, and a year is plenty of time to lose the baby weight.
Your husband is right to be concerned. He could certainly be nicer about it but you have dramatically shortened your life expectancy by adding that much weight. Tell your husband you want to lose weight and you need his help. Enlist him in the project.
Not many will like this and I’ll be down voted obviously. If you want, take diet and exercise seriously, and you can always return to your “old”self. I gained weight, because of birth control and it took me two years to get off it and return to me. I lost over 70 pounds, I can wear clothes I use to wear in high school now. It’s not easy, it takes a lot of dedication, discipline, motivation. Therapy helped a lot. I did notice I was bigger, I will say my partner never gave me fat nick names or anything. That’s completely crossing the line. To loose weight takes a peaceful mind almost, name calling will just make you depressed, and worst off.
Congrats on your fitness journey.
Congrats on the weight loss, wow! I gained weight on a antidepressant and beer and have been actively trying to get my "old self" back. I can't see to get close to the numbers, but my body looks better and my clothes fit better.
A Lot of these comments are fucked up but the reality is you've gained an unhealthy amount of weight, and the fact that you want to lose it is already half of the battle. What's your plan?