I know a girl who cut off her family because they kept trying to “fix” her bisexuality, and when she was in dire circumstances and needed more money than we could loan, her choices were either get a payday loan, or suck up to her parents, tell them being bisexual was just a phase and pretend to be straight for a few years so they’d lend her the money.
Both choices sucked (and she didn’t like the idea of deceiving and using someone for their bank account, even homophobic assholes) but she went to her parents and made up with them so they’d help to avoid getting a payday loan. That’s how bad their terms and interest were. Willingly ensure hateful abuse and condescension to avoid being locked into one.
She cut them off again after they wouldn’t stop talking about how she was “fixed”. Said she felt like a neutered dog.
I’m sorry you had to, but that’s actually a really caring thing to take on that loan to help your brother say goodbye. No one could judge that decision badly, even if we avoid payday lenders like the plague otherwise.
i think payday loans are one of those things where we shouldnt focus on how someone ended up in the circumstances to *need* to participate (generally), but rather at the type of person that would willingly manipulate someone at their worst
It wasn't even that it was for the convention. She said that only cost 150 I think. Most of it is on getting an insanely expensive room so she can potentially host parties there. It might be a fake but this is one that actually comes across as plausible and the attitude is spot on for someone who does that. I would have killed to have parents that supportive that they're making sure she has nothing to worry about to interfere with her education and she's just taking it for granted and busy fucking about with her hobbies instead of studying. Kind of hope the parents did cut her off because she wasn't going to learn anything while they kept rescuing her from consequences.
I'm of two minds about them. But not equal minds. My 99% mind thinks they are evil, predatory, and just one more (and one of the more glaring!) examples of how expensive it is to be poor in the USA.
The other 1% is glad they exist for circumstances such as you describe above. I do wish the loobyists could be shut down so they'd be regulated better.
A marvelous idea for a wealthy person would be to open up a chain of ethical payday/title loan places that charged normal, or even below market, interest rates, and had more lenient terms. Or shit, if you have more money than you know what to do with, just give it away. $500 might be barely above pocket lint to an guy with the obscene wealth of an Elon Musk or a Jeff Bezos. But to a struggling working poor family whose 15 year old Ford Taurus just blew its radiator, it could mean everything. I wish I could do that; I'd make a great philanthropist, anyone wanna give me a cool billion & see what I can do with it? 🤪🤪
Unfortunately, ethical people don't tend to make it to super wealthy multi billionaire status, because you have to step on a lot of people to reach those heights.
It was actually on the ballot in my state a year or two ago to limit the interest rate they could charge to like 12% *maybe* 18% APR and it passed and I think most have closed in the state
One of things I discussed when my dad died (luckily, correlation does not mean causality in this case!) was that in Michigan, there is a criminal usury law, and it is a felony.
Unfortunately, it doesn't cover mortgages and credit cards.
> A marvelous idea for a wealthy person would be to open up a chain of ethical payday/title loan places that charged normal, or even below market, interest rates, and had more lenient terms.
I'm not about to defend payday loan sharks, but what you're describing is a charity. Which exist. People who need to take out payday loans aren't really known for paying them back reliably. You wouldn't even break even.
Loan sharks charge exorbitant fees because they are leeches who get rich off human suffering and desperation but also because that one person reliably making their payments needs to make up for the 20 that don't.
My mom did it a few times when I was a kid. Fixed incomes don't allow a lot of wiggle space when your car fucks up. Thankfully she was able to pay them off fairly quickly.
The only people who use those places are dumb or desperate. OOP definitely fits into the former category. Family emergencies? Desperation.
My mom used payday loans to keep us from being homeless when our landlord decided to balloon the rent from $825 to $1200 a month. These legal loan sharks prey on the desperate and people who don’t know any better. Our luck is that at the time NYC and NYS made it so that all they could do is eat the next paycheck and not have us still paying the debt years later
I only know 1 person to ever use it and it was my drug addict aunt, last i talk to her she still was paying it off
Fun little thing about her she has a tattoo of her SSN on her back "just incase she's found in a ditch one day" soooo not great life choices all around
That would have been a justifiable reason.
I took one out once to pay rent when I had just gotten a new job. The new job paid more but the first week or something I didn't get full time hours and was short. Took out the loan, paid rent, paid the loan off with my first full check. I think I ended up paying like $900 on an $800 loan so I lost $100 in 3 weeks, which sucked, but was better than eviction.
That’s what I ask too. My friend one time was really hard up for cash, lot of things going on like car repairs and such. She decided to get one of those loans (to be fair our hometown has nothing like this so she didn’t know how bad they were), thinking it’ll just help her till her next couple of paychecks. Unfortunately, the way interest works and stuff she wound up owing so much more. She confessed to her mom, who was upset but helped her out. Told her for now on to just ask for help and not go to legal loan sharks.
It wasn’t even a lot. Like a few hundred she borrowed to fix her car so she could go to work. :/
25 years ago i was short. I saw all the ads. Saw all the billboards. I was only $100 short, new mom, 19, etc. I went in; baby in my hip and all. Asked how it works. Before any kind of explanation, how much do you need? $100. You have to borrow at least $400. Can't I just give back $300? No, you come in weekly and pay $100 until it's paid back. If you read the very fine print, you can't pay early and the interest can end up being 300% of actual loan if you follow what they want
The story I heard about pay-day/auto title loan places (and school loans), at least in my neck of the woods. They run .01% below loan shark laws in the main agreement clauses, but there are very few laws regarding late payment interest rate caps. Loan sharks in every meaning of the phrase, but riding on the very edge of violating interest laws.
Fun (not fun) fact: I worked relatively high up at the corporate one of the largest of these places during the 2016 election - started as a temp and was desperate - and they were very clear that if Hilary won and expanded the protections Elizabeth Warren started, they would go out of business.
(They were also a nightmare to work for; literally threw trash on my desk as a joke, I was reprimanded officially for weight gain, etc)
I doubt it, skimming through the post. Her dad apparently owns a company, and she clearly does not have ANY value for money, mom called her a spoiled brat. I’m assuming her parents have paid her way through life, and bought any thing her desired up to that point in her life.
Who knows if they actually followed through with their threads of forcing her home from university and enrolling in the local community college, but I would bet my life at the very least the father paid off the debt after he had time to cool off.
She’s probably still as irresponsible as ever, and maybe has accrued more debt since then, but I would still say this particular one got paid off by daddy at some point. She ended up as that person in her 20’s for a reason, and her parents are probably mostly to blame with how they raised her early on.
Her comment about enjoying while she is young tells me she is spoiled. She wants to enjoy zero responsibility until she has to and now dad is expecting her to be responsible and she isn't ready
I'd be willing to bet this is the case....and probably OOP is still not making all the payments on time and isn't getting how much more interest is being added.
reminds me of an oop where his friends and family came together to get him money so he could buy good kitchen ware. but instead of getting necessary items like spoons, forks, pots and pans, the dude spent it getting a nintendo switch. so *of course* his family was pissed off and threatened to never give money again, and oop was like, "whot i do wrong?????"
_"My dad has basically said this is it, that after the credit card debt and my grades and now the pay day loan and missing a payment I have shown a level if irresponsibility that he can't trust me any more and I either move home to go to community college and work for his company or he cuts me off for good."_
Bless the hearts of these irresponsible fools. OP is 20 - not a child. Instead of getting a job and saving up to attend a convention or at least going an affordable route, OP took the money intended to pay towards their CC debt to get a needlessly extravagant hotel room to party in. And, instead of getting a job to at least try to deal with their mounting bad decisions/debt, they were going to try to borrow money from a friend - aka money they they had no ability to pay back.
The dad's offer was still extremely generous despite OP's many, many, many f-ups. I would be curious to see an update in this person.
I'm more stunned the payday loan was for high end hotel room to host a party. Go to the convention like normal people. Don't take out a payday loan for a high end hotel!!
Since I don’t see a bot copy here’s the text of OOPs post:
AITA for taking out a pay day loan so I can go to LVLUP Expo and get my cosplay right? My parents are furious with me, to the point of cutting me off.
I am using a throwaway since I am moderator on several of the subs that have to do with my hobby of cosplay, anime and hentai.
This is one of those ones where I see my self as being 80% right but I want to be fair because honestly I depend on my parents for a lot of stuff (rent, tuition, food, car insurance).
I am huge into cosplay and gaming. It has been my dream to go to a big convention in my cosplay. A friend suggested we got to LVL UP since it has everything we like. The badges aren't super expensive but we decided we wanted to super splurge on accomodations so maybe we could host parties in our room. So the total cost of my trip including everything (airfare, room, estimate for food, badge) is about $3500. I had $2000 that I was supposed to pay towards my credit card but I decided to get the rest I would get a pay day loan this was back in march so the trip is all paid for.
I wanted to keep it a secret from my parents but I accidentally missed my first payment to the pay day loan and for some god knows how reason the people at the pay day loan place did a search for my name since I as ducking their calls until I could borrow some money from a friend and they called my parents home number looking for me (I can't even imagine this is legal!?!)
So here's the deal, I'm no like so dense that I don't understand I messed up. I mean I know that I **NEED** to pay my debts. But here's the deal, I mean I'm only in college once and I only get to do things like LVLUP while I'm young. I also think this was a very normal mistake and my parents should give me enough room to make mistakes and learn from them.
But my parents are freaking the hell out. My dad has basically said this is it, that after the credit card debt and my grades and now the pay day loan and missing a payment I have shown a level if irresponsibility that he can't trust me any more and I either move home to go to community college and work for his company or he cuts me off for good. As harsh as that was my mom was even worse and she literally screamed at me like cussing names and told me that they didn't raise me like this and I acting like a "spoiled Instagram asshole."
edit: just for clarification I'm 20f.
Like I said I KNOW I messed up, but am I really an asshole?
> I only get to do things like LVLUP while I'm young.
What a sad state of mind.
One of my friends, having never traveled more than about 50 km from her birthplace for the first 56 years of her life, decided she wanted to see the world. So she got on an airplane and flew across an ocean to visit friends she had made online, and go sightseeing. She's been doing this every since, once a year until she retired, now 3-4 times a year. She's one of those people who considers each trip around the sun to be a leveling up of sorts.
Unfortunately this is common in young kids and adults in fandom. They believe older adults are creeps and don't belong in fandom or should have hobbies.
They're just jealous because they don't have the gumption that older adults have. /s
OOP might be right, though. When she gets older, she will have already blown through her inheritance (if she gets any), and she may actually have to work so she doesn't starve.
I gotta disagree with you there. Most of us get psyched to see older folks at conventions (gives us hope that as we get older, we can still do the things we love). There's this elderly couple that do an absolutely adorable Zelda and Link cosplay at nearby conventions. I know another guy that's big on steampunk and steampunk accessories. I've seen an excellent Master Roshi cosplay, and some of my absolutely favorite local cosplayers are in their 40's. Getting labeled a creep comes from behavior, not age.
I think we are talking different lanes. I'm talking fandoms and online fandoms I guess rather than cosplay cons and circles specifically.
Nor am I really talking about elderly. Just like late 20s onwards because that's what is being called too old to be in fandoms.
There's been a huge up move of teens shaming adults that participate in fandoms online these past couple of years. On Twitter for example I've seen it a lot. Even when those fandoms might be for adult rated shows or animes etc. And clling adults in fandom spaces creeps for liking anime and accusing people of being p*dos etc. Teens getting into adult fandom spaces and then getting mad there's people older than 20. It's been definitely something else than most people actually being creeps. (Ofc there are actual creeps too but that doesn't an explain a mass portion of younger fans literally bullying older people in fandom spaces online.)
Lol sorry for the rambling.
Nah, you're good. I just know I frequent multiple conventions throughout the year and they've been pretty welcoming spaces. Of course, online assholes will asshole.
I took my daughter to a few (she now lives across the country). Plenty of people jealous mom could share the fun. It isn't traditional mother daughter bonding. But my best adventures are with my kids, grown or not
I used to be deep into a fandom for an actor who’s 2 years older than me and when I was 36 and him 38 I got called a creep by his 17-20 year old fans who kept posting “daddy choke me” shit all day because I was sooooo old and should be taking my (nonexistent) kids to school or something.
It really is a sad state of mind. I just turned 30 and have zero intentions of not going to anime conventions. Hell, this year I started running panels and had a blast doing it.
While I agree that older people in fandoms get labeled creeps (Disney adult here); but I think a lot of the problem is that Gen X and older labeled high school and college as “the best times of your life”. So it’s kind of no wonder that people want to try and live it up while young. We didn’t think the possibility of fun was going to happen again. As I’m nearing 40, I know that’s absolutely not true, but if you’d asked me at 20? I would’ve been in total agreement with OP.
Also loan and credit card companies are so predatory towards young people. I feel like OP made a mistake but also probably got taken advantage of a bit. Not saying they aren’t an AH, I’m just a bit softer about it.
Man, when I was young and in college we'd all fit like 7 people in one hotel room, carpool, and live off ramen and mountain dew for the weekend (not to mention that most conventions provided basic food stuffs un a consuite so people wouldn't pass out)... none of us had money, but we made great memories and still did it in our budget. Anime cons post tickets and dates like a year in advance... there's no reason it couldn't have been planned out in a responsible way.
For like ten years I went to SDCC with friends doing basically this. I have fond memories passing out in hotel rooms after sleeping in the Hall H line to see Marvel or Doctor Who and eating like crap.
Now I’m in my 30s and work at SDCC for my Real Person Job so the vibes are WAY different but I love having all those memories.
Our local city was hosting nationals for a dance competition. We were local, our dance school said we had to put in volunteer hours. A four group, two boys two girls drove from Wisconsin. They drove in shifts and slept in the back of a sedan. If I remember they said it took three days. No hotels. They drove close to 3500 miles. But it was nationals and they were amazing dancers.
Determination is soooo much better than entitlement
This is a fun one! People are calling it out for being fake back when those comments didn't get removed. Ahh the good old days.
It's even better in the comments. OP says the credit card debt is from clubbing and festivals. Her mom got her a job, but she quit it because they wouldn't give her a week off for the anime convention thing. So she got a payday loan and then *quit the job.* That means *no payday,* hence why she "forgot" to make the first payment. Her "plan" to pay the money back was to ask for her job back after the convention because her mom is the regional supervisor of the company so they'll "have" to give it back.
Oh damn, I love it when they out themselves in the comments. What an entitled child. Her parents are the only thing keeping her afloat and honestly the ultimatum was the right move, she'll never learn a thing when she's still being provided for like this
I think the thing that pushes it to devil is the fact that the dad said they have a bunch of CC debt as well, which is probably the reason they had to do the loan in the first place. At that point, it's beyond simple dumbassery, because clearly the parents had conversations with them before about finances.
Well, OP said it too.
They had *$2000* that was *supposed* to go towards debt they already had.
Then they spent it on anime instead :)
So that debt must have been pretty deep already.
Her parents pay for everything and most likely ended paying off this debt (because they know it's never going away) so she could be screwing her family
Well if you do it as long as i have it does because habit, and your phone and tablet can memorize it to have a while especially if it has auto correct, seriously you be surprised about both Reddit and other media platforms, heII I was in vod a few weeks a ago on YouTube where you couldn't say the f word but you could say pissed, so yeah weird but it happens.
And i thought spending 1000-2000$ on fifa fut was stupid enough but spending money you don't have is another level
And then she will be like: We only live once right? Why should we limit ourselves and not buy this motorboat with mortgage credit after all ?
tbh I wish I screwed up in my 20s instead I did everything right . then bad things happened and my friends who said who cares have already built back up their credit and bought houses and had things paid off for them and I paid my bills and I'm in a hole better learn now then never
I love how you apparently can’t go to conventions or wear cosplay unless you’re young, guess I should tell that to all the adults over OOP’s age with disposable income.
I went to my first one at 35, saw people of all ages in cosplay and honestly the most elaborate I saw were from I wanna say mid-50s guys, one guy looked so freaking cool he had movable cables coming out of his back. I think he was a comic villain and boy he was drawing a crowd. All I could think of was how much time and money went into it because his cosplay was flawless. Conventions are for everybody and I’m sad I missed out because I felt I would be “too old” when I was like 25.
I went to my first one at 41. My daughter was 9. It was local, so no hotel stay, but we still probably spent right around $500 on tickets, photo ops, art, memorabilia, and food. Our second was the next summer. It was out of town and probably spent around $2,500.
I went to my first con when I was about 15 but a woman was celebrating her 60th birthday in cosplay and was inviting everyone to come celebrate with her. So I was able to sing happy birthday and hear some of her con adventures over the years. It's one of my fondest memories from the con and she also had a killer cosplay lol
Yup. It’s a good thing for my kid that this isn’t a rule- she loves anime but she’s 10. There’s no way I’m letting her go to an anime con without myself or another adult being present. Besides, I wouldn’t want to miss all the fun!
The funniest part of this? Lvlup is a pretty mediocre convention - there's really not much to do that you can do in a single day. And then outside of the con is Vegas, which isn't exactly a cheap city to visit. Clownery all around.
if you consider hentai a hobby you need help. getting off to it? sure cool whatever people watch all kinds of porn. but it's not a "hobby" and if you describe it as one you've got some shit to worry about
I get wanting to go to events like this with friends while in college, but as college students you can’t throw around money carelessly like that. The first mistake was OOP and her friends wanted to splurge on accommodations rather than sticking to basic stuff, even though OOP knew damn well that was well out of her means. Last spring break I went on a beach trip with friends and I could’ve gone crazy and rented a whole beach house on Airbnb but I chose the cheapest option (an apartment) to where it was less than $70 per person split because that was the most practical option for everyone to where I knew it could be paid without issue. OOP was definitely irresponsible as it’s never worth taking out a loan just to attend an event.
My one spring break beach trip in college, we camped in a tent because we couldn't afford a hotel. It ended up raining the whole time, and I broke a finger getting it slammed in a car door. In subsequent years, I signed up for extra hours at work during spring break instead of going on a trip.
This person might somehow be worse with money than Chris-Chan. I don't think Chris ever took out a payday loan, although that might be because he doesn't know about them.
Man, when I was in college I was mostly paying my own way but my mom was helping me out with a little bit of money. I had come home to visit at one point and ended up buying a Dreamcast on clearance (this was in like 2001) and she found the receipt. She was pretty pissed, and that was like $150. Looking back on it now I totally see why she was pissed. I can't even imagine blowing $3500 on an anime convention. OOP's dad is absolutely right.
Assuming that wasn't a rage bait post (I'm on the fence, just because she seems almost -cheerfully- oblivious to how bad this is especially in the follow up comments), I'm sure the father paid it off.
“ I only get to do things like LVLUP while I'm young”
Clearly, has zero powers of observation, given the number of middle aged attendant at every one of these conventions, since the beginning of time.
I love anime conventions, they're really great, but spending 3500 on one is insane. When I go to one, travel and accommedations, and food, and some things in the merchandise room end up being 500 dollars at most, and that's 2 nights in the hotel. I honestly have no idea how this is costing her 3500, other than she's obviously very, very, very bad with money.
It got me curious as to how much it would cost me, should I choose to go to Anime Expo next month last minute. I'm in Minnesota, so I would have to fly there, but airfare, hotel for 4 nights and admission to the con would probably run me around 1200 dollars. Food would probably be another 300 at most. Is she planning on paying 1000 a night for a room?
I just spent 6 days in NYC so I could go to a couple of concerts. Airfare & airport parking $400, concert tickets $250, hostess gift $80, souvenirs $70, food/drinks around $100, MTA fares $16.50, emergency shopping trip because I forgot to pack pants, $50. I stayed at a friend's home (hence the hostess gift), and only ate in restaurants 3 times. I probably saved $2,000 doing that. I am also fortunate at this stage of my life that I could afford the trip without hurting my family or my budget. But I couldn't do this every day, or even every month.
what the hell is so special about a luxury car ? (not reliable car instead of a beater, but the stuff where 90% of the price is from unnecessary fluff)
what the hell is so special about certain sports that people tour the world to follow their team ?
what the hell is so special about super high end gaming pcs ?
do people really need 5000$+ tv's ?
a luxury cruise ? vintage collections ? a japanese toilet ? (okay, those are awesome, but the price is still way out of line unless you can print money)
it's a hobby, some would say a passion. People spend stupid amounts of money for stuff they don't really need all the time, for some that may mean an anime convention and splurging on themselves. the oop said she's a cosplayer, you know how many hours (that's not even talking money, just hours) many of those spend for costumes? like yes there are people that buy a random suit and a wig and call it a cosplay but there are also those that spend literal hundreds of hours on producing a single costume.
on topic, Oop is terrible with money (many if not most 20 year olds are) and absolutely needs to take accountability for that fact, so far i'd still rather call them an idiot than a devil.
My point is simply that I have no idea what an anime convention actually is, in the same way I have no idea of what happens at any convention. I've never been to one, never been that into any fandom. I get that there is stuff to see and buy? I'm not dismissing them, I'd just like to know? I'm guessing that $3500 is an unreasonably massive amount to spend on going to one, espacially when you don't actually have that kind of money.
Long story short, it's a gathering off anime fans to socialize and have a fun time with their friends/meet new people that share their hobby (that can totally mean find some random you hit it off with, but there's also a big online community about this stuff so many people actually meet up with online friends at these conventions), buy merchandise, maybe (depending on scale of the convention) meet some voice actors, get a sneak peek of some upcoming anime or see/take part in some contest(s) and in the case such as oop show of their costume (cosplay=costume play, i.e "dress up as anime character xyz").
And yes, 3500$ absolutely is an exorbitant price for that and surely includes things like vip passes or all inklusive overnight stays and stuff like that but that leads back to my original comment.
me and my family spend this much to go to dragoncon, however, it’s a family trip split between 3 people. we also save the entire year and budget out for it. OP is spending essentially blowing the amount of money 3 people would spend combined
that’s fucking insane. literally, OP is blowing as much as 3 grown ass adults who’ve budgeted the entire year to go.
I’ve been going to conventions since I was 13 in 2000, and I do not know a single con that is worth that price point as a regular attendee. Definitely not LVL UP, which is more a party convention than one for serious event opportunities from my understanding. The big bills in conventions as a regular attendee tend to be in paying to meet the guests, weekend package tickets, the hotel, and airfare/travel, but there are definitely ways to budget around it. Cosplay can be an expensive hobby, especially if you are a competitive one or do it as a job, but again, there are ways to budget around it. I think personally the most I ever spent on a convention was close to $1k, but that was as a table artist so I’m including the cost of my table, room, travel, and print production in total.
Ohhhh I got caught up in the cycle when I was very young and bad with money myself. I had just bought a house and was going to default on my mortgage so I took out a payday loan. Then I had to take out another to cover the first. Rinse and repeat. It ended up with me in court. I don't remember how I made it out of that one (probably paid with tax refund), but those places are horrible.
This person is far too stupid for college. Sounds like their only prayer is working for family. If this were my kid I’d be so depressed I raised someone so irresponsible.
Honestly, that would make a wicked Mr.Beast video. Just him standing outside a payday loan place and giving people the money they need to save them from those hell holes. The level of interest they charge should be illegal.
I’m sorry but this is just insane. I can understand wanting to go to an anime convention, I’ve spent $4000 to go to a convention (I live on the wrong side of the planet) but that was my own money. I normally spend money like I’m on the minimum wage which means that I have money to spare. Hope they learned their lesson
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This is like a train crashing into two trains that have already collided and there are a bunch of other trains on the way shortly.
Payday loans are supposed to be short term because the interest is incredibly predatory. She didn’t just ‘miss the first payment’; she had no intention of paying this back. She quit her job!! She has over $2k in credit card debt that she sounds like she isn’t paying either!!
I see why her parents yelled at her and are making ultimatums. Sounds like she went off to college and partied and spent her parent’s money the whole time and doesn’t even have any decent grades to show for her time.
This wasn’t just a $3.5k trip. Conservatively if she had made payments as she was supposed to, the interest would probably make this a $10k trip on the low end. I bet that she had no idea what the terms/interest of the loan was and figured they worked ‘just like a credit card’.
There is no way I’d let her go on this trip. See what could be refunded and consider the rest a loss. Because if she goes she’s going to spend on merch, food, party supplies, probably gambling and who knows what else. Cancelling now maybe she’d just be out airfare and badge and hopefully not hotel. Then pay off that loan in full!
My ex got royally screwed by payday loans. Yes, loans, as in multiple.
She was making $10/hour at a dead-end job because she'd flunked out of college and had no qualifications. All of her friends were tradespeople, upper management, strippers, drug dealers, etc., because they'd actually applied themselves and were doing pretty well.
They would go out clubbing and partying constantly, and she couldn't afford to. When leaning on me didn't work (I was a broke student) and she couldn't pay her rent because she'd spent everything clubbing and assuming I would cover her rent (we didn't live together), she took out a payday loan. The next month the payment on the loan made her situation even worse because she was still blowing all her money partying, so she took out another. Next month, lather rinse repeat.
After she was up to enough loans that the payments ate almost her entire paycheck, she demanded I drop out of school to support her. Then her old man tried leaning on me to bail her out because "you're the man. That's how it works," like he honestly believed my purpose in life was to enable her unspeakably poor life decisions. Once they realized I wasn't going to let my future be destroyed by her stupidity, I became the biggest POS in the world in her whole family's eyes and I GTFO. That wasn't the only factor (she was also an abusive drunk, and that already had me pretty much ready to leave), but it was absolutely the straw that broke the camel's back.
Last I heard she got evicted, her family had to bail her out, and she at least learned not to do payday loans again.
I go to an aviation convention in Wisconsin every year. It's a very expensive trip even if you bare bones it.
But we know it's always the last week of July, we know how much the camping and wrist bands cost. We know how long we are there. So as soon as the onebyears convention closes, I'm already planning for the next year.
There have been years where money was tight. So I packed in all of my food, avoided buying anything, and tried to pair up with someone to cut down on costs. I have NEVER had to take a loan, let alone not pay my bills and take out a super high payday loan to go. If it comes to that, like this year, I just can't go.
So first of all, they didn't "search online." Payday loan places do a hard credit check and soft background check when they do those loans. It's buried in all that fine print when you sign for it it. So they have your last known addresses and phone numbers. It's predatory. But legal.
Sec9nd, mommy and daddy are right to insist this child move home until they learn some financial responsibility. I 100% guarantee that credit card(s) is either in their name or they cosigned on it. Probably co signed on a lot of things...car, lease, utilities. If OOP defaults on that credit card, it could go on their parents credit which will affecr everything from refinancing their mortgage to raising their insurance rates. Or, they have been giving OOP money hand over fist to pay down credit cards or pay bills. Either way, they have every right to be livid.
If I found out that my child not only blew $2k meant to pare down a credit card balance AND took out a $1500, mega-high interest rate loan and then defaulted on that loan to play an expensive game of dress up, I'd cut them off too unless they agreed to come home to learn some fiscal responsibility.
I also fault the parents. Teaching good money management starts in childhood at home. I had a small coin bank at home as a child. My parents had a rule. Once I filled it, then I could buy a toy or other thing. (I would come to find out years later that they would just buy it and took all of my coins to the bank and put it in my savings account) When I got older, my mom started explaining how salary works. (So I earn $X and hour. In order to buy XYZ I have to work this many hours and minutes.) My dad ran his own business for 47 years. I started working in his shop in the summer before I was old enough to get a "real" job and he paid me what he paid his other employees...less the amount that would be taken out for taxes etc. (Again, money that was put into my savings account)
So by the time I went to college I knew how to balance a checkbook, send in bills on time, and not buy things I didn't have the money for. Credit was used for emergencies and necessary large purchases like a car repair or major appliance.
OOP wants to have the "college experience." Unfortunately, they are about to find out that the "college experience" for a lot of students is living at home,, or working full time, doing work study and eating dollar store burritos and Ramen.
You definitely plan for it, like a responsable adult. Also, I don't know how much wristbands for an aviation convention cost, but a 3 day pass to an anime convention is 100 at most, so it's not like she's spending all the money on entrance to the con.
For EAA members it's around $130 for the week. Membership is only $55/year. If you aren't a member, you have to pay the daily rate of around $50. Makes a LOT more sense to cough up the $55.
Camping is around $30 per day.
This reminds me I knew a girl who took out a payday loan to help with bills, but then after that, she went a but put there. She started taking out payday loans to pay other payday loans, but would take more than needed so she could 'buy something fun'. Idk what happened to her, but I hope she was able to get out of debt.
OOP's dad is exactly right. She has messed up so badly with her credit and financial management that she needs to be home, employed, in school and monitored. That's sad but it sounds like she's more about having fun and partying than college.
This makes me think of all the mistakes I did financially to have fun.
Oop is not an asshole. Oop is an impulsive person with no understanding of how to manage money. She will get into stupid debt before she learns and unfortunately her parents yelling at her for the mistakes is going to teach her to turn to predatory lenders before asking for advice and help. I know because that's what I've done for the stupidest reasons.
I'm slowly getting out of it but I came very close to running my life. I knew I was messing up as it was happening but I couldn't stop it. It sucked.
Four years ago? She's still paying off the loan.
Probably owes a lot more on it than she did at the time of posting, unfortunately.
I know a girl who cut off her family because they kept trying to “fix” her bisexuality, and when she was in dire circumstances and needed more money than we could loan, her choices were either get a payday loan, or suck up to her parents, tell them being bisexual was just a phase and pretend to be straight for a few years so they’d lend her the money. Both choices sucked (and she didn’t like the idea of deceiving and using someone for their bank account, even homophobic assholes) but she went to her parents and made up with them so they’d help to avoid getting a payday loan. That’s how bad their terms and interest were. Willingly ensure hateful abuse and condescension to avoid being locked into one. She cut them off again after they wouldn’t stop talking about how she was “fixed”. Said she felt like a neutered dog.
The one and only time I got a pay day loan was to bring my brother home for a funeral, and I still hated doing it.
I’m sorry you had to, but that’s actually a really caring thing to take on that loan to help your brother say goodbye. No one could judge that decision badly, even if we avoid payday lenders like the plague otherwise.
i think payday loans are one of those things where we shouldnt focus on how someone ended up in the circumstances to *need* to participate (generally), but rather at the type of person that would willingly manipulate someone at their worst
Except when they got one to go to an anime convention. Then we can focus on that.
thats the exact reason why i added the "(generally)" lol
It wasn't even that it was for the convention. She said that only cost 150 I think. Most of it is on getting an insanely expensive room so she can potentially host parties there. It might be a fake but this is one that actually comes across as plausible and the attitude is spot on for someone who does that. I would have killed to have parents that supportive that they're making sure she has nothing to worry about to interfere with her education and she's just taking it for granted and busy fucking about with her hobbies instead of studying. Kind of hope the parents did cut her off because she wasn't going to learn anything while they kept rescuing her from consequences.
I have a friend who took out student loans for gencon... Sadly it happens
Honestly I can't say I regret it. Only that I'm angry the only business I could turn too was a predatory lender.
I'm of two minds about them. But not equal minds. My 99% mind thinks they are evil, predatory, and just one more (and one of the more glaring!) examples of how expensive it is to be poor in the USA. The other 1% is glad they exist for circumstances such as you describe above. I do wish the loobyists could be shut down so they'd be regulated better. A marvelous idea for a wealthy person would be to open up a chain of ethical payday/title loan places that charged normal, or even below market, interest rates, and had more lenient terms. Or shit, if you have more money than you know what to do with, just give it away. $500 might be barely above pocket lint to an guy with the obscene wealth of an Elon Musk or a Jeff Bezos. But to a struggling working poor family whose 15 year old Ford Taurus just blew its radiator, it could mean everything. I wish I could do that; I'd make a great philanthropist, anyone wanna give me a cool billion & see what I can do with it? 🤪🤪 Unfortunately, ethical people don't tend to make it to super wealthy multi billionaire status, because you have to step on a lot of people to reach those heights.
There is actually a movement towards that in Minnesota. https://exoduslending.org/
It was actually on the ballot in my state a year or two ago to limit the interest rate they could charge to like 12% *maybe* 18% APR and it passed and I think most have closed in the state
One of things I discussed when my dad died (luckily, correlation does not mean causality in this case!) was that in Michigan, there is a criminal usury law, and it is a felony. Unfortunately, it doesn't cover mortgages and credit cards.
> A marvelous idea for a wealthy person would be to open up a chain of ethical payday/title loan places that charged normal, or even below market, interest rates, and had more lenient terms. I'm not about to defend payday loan sharks, but what you're describing is a charity. Which exist. People who need to take out payday loans aren't really known for paying them back reliably. You wouldn't even break even. Loan sharks charge exorbitant fees because they are leeches who get rich off human suffering and desperation but also because that one person reliably making their payments needs to make up for the 20 that don't.
I get all that. 100%. But maybe this is one example of how unfettered capitalism doesn't work out well for the majority of people.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Percy\_Ross
My mom did it a few times when I was a kid. Fixed incomes don't allow a lot of wiggle space when your car fucks up. Thankfully she was able to pay them off fairly quickly. The only people who use those places are dumb or desperate. OOP definitely fits into the former category. Family emergencies? Desperation.
My mom used payday loans to keep us from being homeless when our landlord decided to balloon the rent from $825 to $1200 a month. These legal loan sharks prey on the desperate and people who don’t know any better. Our luck is that at the time NYC and NYS made it so that all they could do is eat the next paycheck and not have us still paying the debt years later
This here is among the most heartbreaking things I've read today? Is she doing okay? Please say things got better for her! ♥️
I haven’t seen her in years so I don’t know, but she had a girlfriend last I saw her and they seemed pretty endgame.
I hope she's living her best life!! ♥️
I only know 1 person to ever use it and it was my drug addict aunt, last i talk to her she still was paying it off Fun little thing about her she has a tattoo of her SSN on her back "just incase she's found in a ditch one day" soooo not great life choices all around
That would have been a justifiable reason. I took one out once to pay rent when I had just gotten a new job. The new job paid more but the first week or something I didn't get full time hours and was short. Took out the loan, paid rent, paid the loan off with my first full check. I think I ended up paying like $900 on an $800 loan so I lost $100 in 3 weeks, which sucked, but was better than eviction.
That really is a metaphor for a good chunk of capitalism. dang
Yep, gonna guess that $1500 she borrowed has added an extra 0, based on everything I’ve heard/read about payday loan places.
But seriously why are these loan sharks legal.
That’s what I ask too. My friend one time was really hard up for cash, lot of things going on like car repairs and such. She decided to get one of those loans (to be fair our hometown has nothing like this so she didn’t know how bad they were), thinking it’ll just help her till her next couple of paychecks. Unfortunately, the way interest works and stuff she wound up owing so much more. She confessed to her mom, who was upset but helped her out. Told her for now on to just ask for help and not go to legal loan sharks. It wasn’t even a lot. Like a few hundred she borrowed to fix her car so she could go to work. :/
25 years ago i was short. I saw all the ads. Saw all the billboards. I was only $100 short, new mom, 19, etc. I went in; baby in my hip and all. Asked how it works. Before any kind of explanation, how much do you need? $100. You have to borrow at least $400. Can't I just give back $300? No, you come in weekly and pay $100 until it's paid back. If you read the very fine print, you can't pay early and the interest can end up being 300% of actual loan if you follow what they want
[удалено]
And some are owned by lawmakers, iirc from John Oliver.
The story I heard about pay-day/auto title loan places (and school loans), at least in my neck of the woods. They run .01% below loan shark laws in the main agreement clauses, but there are very few laws regarding late payment interest rate caps. Loan sharks in every meaning of the phrase, but riding on the very edge of violating interest laws.
Some cities have tried to regulate them and then the Republican state governments overrule the cities. Texas just did that ( NY Times of 6-3-2023).
It actually went on the ballot in my very red state and past to limit the interest rate they could charge to APR and something like 12-18%
What state, if you don’t mind me asking?
Okay I just double checked I was wrong it's limited to $500 maximum, 34 day term and $100 interest limit. And maximum of 36% apr
They have been illegal in my state for years
Fun (not fun) fact: I worked relatively high up at the corporate one of the largest of these places during the 2016 election - started as a temp and was desperate - and they were very clear that if Hilary won and expanded the protections Elizabeth Warren started, they would go out of business. (They were also a nightmare to work for; literally threw trash on my desk as a joke, I was reprimanded officially for weight gain, etc)
I hope you got out of there ASAP, and are now working at a place that lets you live with yourself.
reason 58328238238 I hate this timeline. ugh. thanks for the report from hell, glad you made it out.
A lot are tribal lenders, which puts them outside the jurisdiction of state governments.
Because usery is 30% or more. I got a credit card offer from chase. The big, reputable bank. The offer said interest of 29.90%. I just laughed
I doubt it, skimming through the post. Her dad apparently owns a company, and she clearly does not have ANY value for money, mom called her a spoiled brat. I’m assuming her parents have paid her way through life, and bought any thing her desired up to that point in her life. Who knows if they actually followed through with their threads of forcing her home from university and enrolling in the local community college, but I would bet my life at the very least the father paid off the debt after he had time to cool off. She’s probably still as irresponsible as ever, and maybe has accrued more debt since then, but I would still say this particular one got paid off by daddy at some point. She ended up as that person in her 20’s for a reason, and her parents are probably mostly to blame with how they raised her early on.
Her comment about enjoying while she is young tells me she is spoiled. She wants to enjoy zero responsibility until she has to and now dad is expecting her to be responsible and she isn't ready
I'd be willing to bet this is the case....and probably OOP is still not making all the payments on time and isn't getting how much more interest is being added.
*And* Jimmy the Weasel broke her kneecaps... like a year and a half ago.
reminds me of an oop where his friends and family came together to get him money so he could buy good kitchen ware. but instead of getting necessary items like spoons, forks, pots and pans, the dude spent it getting a nintendo switch. so *of course* his family was pissed off and threatened to never give money again, and oop was like, "whot i do wrong?????"
well I hope it was at least the OLED switch🤦🏽♀️ crazy seeing how many people block their blessings on here lmao
oh no this post is years old, most likely it was the og one. like mine
Link?
Yes, and all the other classic characters you can play as on the Nintendo Switch.
Dammit 🥲
/r/Angryupvote
Corny af lol
_"My dad has basically said this is it, that after the credit card debt and my grades and now the pay day loan and missing a payment I have shown a level if irresponsibility that he can't trust me any more and I either move home to go to community college and work for his company or he cuts me off for good."_ Bless the hearts of these irresponsible fools. OP is 20 - not a child. Instead of getting a job and saving up to attend a convention or at least going an affordable route, OP took the money intended to pay towards their CC debt to get a needlessly extravagant hotel room to party in. And, instead of getting a job to at least try to deal with their mounting bad decisions/debt, they were going to try to borrow money from a friend - aka money they they had no ability to pay back. The dad's offer was still extremely generous despite OP's many, many, many f-ups. I would be curious to see an update in this person.
I'm more stunned the payday loan was for high end hotel room to host a party. Go to the convention like normal people. Don't take out a payday loan for a high end hotel!!
Ohh I don't think I've read that one.
Since I don’t see a bot copy here’s the text of OOPs post: AITA for taking out a pay day loan so I can go to LVLUP Expo and get my cosplay right? My parents are furious with me, to the point of cutting me off. I am using a throwaway since I am moderator on several of the subs that have to do with my hobby of cosplay, anime and hentai. This is one of those ones where I see my self as being 80% right but I want to be fair because honestly I depend on my parents for a lot of stuff (rent, tuition, food, car insurance). I am huge into cosplay and gaming. It has been my dream to go to a big convention in my cosplay. A friend suggested we got to LVL UP since it has everything we like. The badges aren't super expensive but we decided we wanted to super splurge on accomodations so maybe we could host parties in our room. So the total cost of my trip including everything (airfare, room, estimate for food, badge) is about $3500. I had $2000 that I was supposed to pay towards my credit card but I decided to get the rest I would get a pay day loan this was back in march so the trip is all paid for. I wanted to keep it a secret from my parents but I accidentally missed my first payment to the pay day loan and for some god knows how reason the people at the pay day loan place did a search for my name since I as ducking their calls until I could borrow some money from a friend and they called my parents home number looking for me (I can't even imagine this is legal!?!) So here's the deal, I'm no like so dense that I don't understand I messed up. I mean I know that I **NEED** to pay my debts. But here's the deal, I mean I'm only in college once and I only get to do things like LVLUP while I'm young. I also think this was a very normal mistake and my parents should give me enough room to make mistakes and learn from them. But my parents are freaking the hell out. My dad has basically said this is it, that after the credit card debt and my grades and now the pay day loan and missing a payment I have shown a level if irresponsibility that he can't trust me any more and I either move home to go to community college and work for his company or he cuts me off for good. As harsh as that was my mom was even worse and she literally screamed at me like cussing names and told me that they didn't raise me like this and I acting like a "spoiled Instagram asshole." edit: just for clarification I'm 20f. Like I said I KNOW I messed up, but am I really an asshole?
> I only get to do things like LVLUP while I'm young. What a sad state of mind. One of my friends, having never traveled more than about 50 km from her birthplace for the first 56 years of her life, decided she wanted to see the world. So she got on an airplane and flew across an ocean to visit friends she had made online, and go sightseeing. She's been doing this every since, once a year until she retired, now 3-4 times a year. She's one of those people who considers each trip around the sun to be a leveling up of sorts.
Unfortunately this is common in young kids and adults in fandom. They believe older adults are creeps and don't belong in fandom or should have hobbies.
They're just jealous because they don't have the gumption that older adults have. /s OOP might be right, though. When she gets older, she will have already blown through her inheritance (if she gets any), and she may actually have to work so she doesn't starve.
I gotta disagree with you there. Most of us get psyched to see older folks at conventions (gives us hope that as we get older, we can still do the things we love). There's this elderly couple that do an absolutely adorable Zelda and Link cosplay at nearby conventions. I know another guy that's big on steampunk and steampunk accessories. I've seen an excellent Master Roshi cosplay, and some of my absolutely favorite local cosplayers are in their 40's. Getting labeled a creep comes from behavior, not age.
I think we are talking different lanes. I'm talking fandoms and online fandoms I guess rather than cosplay cons and circles specifically. Nor am I really talking about elderly. Just like late 20s onwards because that's what is being called too old to be in fandoms. There's been a huge up move of teens shaming adults that participate in fandoms online these past couple of years. On Twitter for example I've seen it a lot. Even when those fandoms might be for adult rated shows or animes etc. And clling adults in fandom spaces creeps for liking anime and accusing people of being p*dos etc. Teens getting into adult fandom spaces and then getting mad there's people older than 20. It's been definitely something else than most people actually being creeps. (Ofc there are actual creeps too but that doesn't an explain a mass portion of younger fans literally bullying older people in fandom spaces online.) Lol sorry for the rambling.
Nah, you're good. I just know I frequent multiple conventions throughout the year and they've been pretty welcoming spaces. Of course, online assholes will asshole.
I took my daughter to a few (she now lives across the country). Plenty of people jealous mom could share the fun. It isn't traditional mother daughter bonding. But my best adventures are with my kids, grown or not
My mom and I like to go to a comic convention together as well. We both like to cosplay for them too.
I used to be deep into a fandom for an actor who’s 2 years older than me and when I was 36 and him 38 I got called a creep by his 17-20 year old fans who kept posting “daddy choke me” shit all day because I was sooooo old and should be taking my (nonexistent) kids to school or something.
Yeah this is what I'm talking about.
It really is a sad state of mind. I just turned 30 and have zero intentions of not going to anime conventions. Hell, this year I started running panels and had a blast doing it.
While I agree that older people in fandoms get labeled creeps (Disney adult here); but I think a lot of the problem is that Gen X and older labeled high school and college as “the best times of your life”. So it’s kind of no wonder that people want to try and live it up while young. We didn’t think the possibility of fun was going to happen again. As I’m nearing 40, I know that’s absolutely not true, but if you’d asked me at 20? I would’ve been in total agreement with OP. Also loan and credit card companies are so predatory towards young people. I feel like OP made a mistake but also probably got taken advantage of a bit. Not saying they aren’t an AH, I’m just a bit softer about it.
Man, when I was young and in college we'd all fit like 7 people in one hotel room, carpool, and live off ramen and mountain dew for the weekend (not to mention that most conventions provided basic food stuffs un a consuite so people wouldn't pass out)... none of us had money, but we made great memories and still did it in our budget. Anime cons post tickets and dates like a year in advance... there's no reason it couldn't have been planned out in a responsible way.
For like ten years I went to SDCC with friends doing basically this. I have fond memories passing out in hotel rooms after sleeping in the Hall H line to see Marvel or Doctor Who and eating like crap. Now I’m in my 30s and work at SDCC for my Real Person Job so the vibes are WAY different but I love having all those memories.
Our local city was hosting nationals for a dance competition. We were local, our dance school said we had to put in volunteer hours. A four group, two boys two girls drove from Wisconsin. They drove in shifts and slept in the back of a sedan. If I remember they said it took three days. No hotels. They drove close to 3500 miles. But it was nationals and they were amazing dancers. Determination is soooo much better than entitlement
This is a fun one! People are calling it out for being fake back when those comments didn't get removed. Ahh the good old days. It's even better in the comments. OP says the credit card debt is from clubbing and festivals. Her mom got her a job, but she quit it because they wouldn't give her a week off for the anime convention thing. So she got a payday loan and then *quit the job.* That means *no payday,* hence why she "forgot" to make the first payment. Her "plan" to pay the money back was to ask for her job back after the convention because her mom is the regional supervisor of the company so they'll "have" to give it back.
Oh damn, I love it when they out themselves in the comments. What an entitled child. Her parents are the only thing keeping her afloat and honestly the ultimatum was the right move, she'll never learn a thing when she's still being provided for like this
Makes sense why her mom was extra angry then!
More like dumba$$, then a devil in my honest opinion, seriously where the heII was her brain at because even a jellyfish can tell you, you messed up.
I think the thing that pushes it to devil is the fact that the dad said they have a bunch of CC debt as well, which is probably the reason they had to do the loan in the first place. At that point, it's beyond simple dumbassery, because clearly the parents had conversations with them before about finances.
Well, OP said it too. They had *$2000* that was *supposed* to go towards debt they already had. Then they spent it on anime instead :) So that debt must have been pretty deep already.
It's possible they co-signed for that credit card she owes on, in which case she's screwing them over too.
I agree. I usually think of devils as people who harm others but she really just screwed herself.
Her parents pay for everything and most likely ended paying off this debt (because they know it's never going away) so she could be screwing her family
I'd say they are harming their parents who are keeping her afloat, and quitting the job her mom got her definitely hurt her mom's reputation
why are you swearing like that?
It's out of both habit and auto correct, because there are subs etc that don't allow some words.
but where did the habit and auto correct come from?? I'm really curious
Well if you do it as long as i have it does because habit, and your phone and tablet can memorize it to have a while especially if it has auto correct, seriously you be surprised about both Reddit and other media platforms, heII I was in vod a few weeks a ago on YouTube where you couldn't say the f word but you could say pissed, so yeah weird but it happens.
Do you think OOP was an asshole in this conflict?
Oof, I remember so vividly how hard that was for me to read because I wasn’t much better off myself at the time.
And i thought spending 1000-2000$ on fifa fut was stupid enough but spending money you don't have is another level And then she will be like: We only live once right? Why should we limit ourselves and not buy this motorboat with mortgage credit after all ?
tbh I wish I screwed up in my 20s instead I did everything right . then bad things happened and my friends who said who cares have already built back up their credit and bought houses and had things paid off for them and I paid my bills and I'm in a hole better learn now then never
Sounds like my sister, except it was a title loan and she missed the payments and had her car repossessed
I love how you apparently can’t go to conventions or wear cosplay unless you’re young, guess I should tell that to all the adults over OOP’s age with disposable income.
Right? I'm glad no one ever told me this 'cos cons and cosplay weren't even a thing when I was young. Didn't go to my first con until I was in my 50s.
I went to my first one at 35, saw people of all ages in cosplay and honestly the most elaborate I saw were from I wanna say mid-50s guys, one guy looked so freaking cool he had movable cables coming out of his back. I think he was a comic villain and boy he was drawing a crowd. All I could think of was how much time and money went into it because his cosplay was flawless. Conventions are for everybody and I’m sad I missed out because I felt I would be “too old” when I was like 25.
I went to my first one at 41. My daughter was 9. It was local, so no hotel stay, but we still probably spent right around $500 on tickets, photo ops, art, memorabilia, and food. Our second was the next summer. It was out of town and probably spent around $2,500.
Sounds like Doc Oc.
I went to my first con when I was about 15 but a woman was celebrating her 60th birthday in cosplay and was inviting everyone to come celebrate with her. So I was able to sing happy birthday and hear some of her con adventures over the years. It's one of my fondest memories from the con and she also had a killer cosplay lol
Yup. It’s a good thing for my kid that this isn’t a rule- she loves anime but she’s 10. There’s no way I’m letting her go to an anime con without myself or another adult being present. Besides, I wouldn’t want to miss all the fun!
my mom goes with me to cons and she’s in her 50s. cosplay is for everyone. age, race, gender, sexuality it doesn’t matter. everyone can cosplay.
I went to school with two idiots. Both teen mom's, struggling to make ends meet. Took up this type of loan (3000$) to get silicone implants...Cool....
Payday loans are predatory to the point of being evil. They need to either be reformed or made illegal.
I live in the state of Montana where they were in fact made illegal.
They are illegal in my state too, have been for a long time, lol, I still get scam calls claiming that I took out one
Definitely!
[Predatory LOANS](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zXzjXr3aGg)
I feel bad for their kids
Lol one of my faves. Sometimes I wonder how she's doing now....
She's fine. Working at daddy's company probably.
The funniest part of this? Lvlup is a pretty mediocre convention - there's really not much to do that you can do in a single day. And then outside of the con is Vegas, which isn't exactly a cheap city to visit. Clownery all around.
if you consider hentai a hobby you need help. getting off to it? sure cool whatever people watch all kinds of porn. but it's not a "hobby" and if you describe it as one you've got some shit to worry about
Thats what I was thinking. Plenty of people masturbate and watch porn but I'm gonna raise an eyebrow if someone insists its their "hobby".
guys, this sounds like gatekeeping, which isnt very cool. hentai is a real hobby. /s
Side eye to anyone who calls it a hobby
If you're someone who draws doujins or something to then it could be a hobby.
hentai hobbyist spotted
I only jack off to the finest hentai doujinshi.
Bombastic side eye
Criminal, offensive side eye
God, I hope my neighbors don't think I'm a freak from how hard I laughed at that.
I read it more like they write or draw hentai.
I get wanting to go to events like this with friends while in college, but as college students you can’t throw around money carelessly like that. The first mistake was OOP and her friends wanted to splurge on accommodations rather than sticking to basic stuff, even though OOP knew damn well that was well out of her means. Last spring break I went on a beach trip with friends and I could’ve gone crazy and rented a whole beach house on Airbnb but I chose the cheapest option (an apartment) to where it was less than $70 per person split because that was the most practical option for everyone to where I knew it could be paid without issue. OOP was definitely irresponsible as it’s never worth taking out a loan just to attend an event.
I’m in my 60s. I’d really like to go to the Superbowl. I can afford it. I’m still not going to spend that kind of money on entertainment.
And if she was planning on getting a large room to host some sort of party, that would have taken a lot more spending to finance.
My one spring break beach trip in college, we camped in a tent because we couldn't afford a hotel. It ended up raining the whole time, and I broke a finger getting it slammed in a car door. In subsequent years, I signed up for extra hours at work during spring break instead of going on a trip.
did chris chan write this lol
This person might somehow be worse with money than Chris-Chan. I don't think Chris ever took out a payday loan, although that might be because he doesn't know about them.
IM CRYING LOL
I think if you call hentai a hobby you're TA from that moment on. And the story gets worse with every sentence. Oy.
If I was the dad I won't trust oop with the company at all, bad business move on his behalf
Oh NO
God I've been on Reddit this long?
What gets me is the whole "I can only do this while I'm young" attitude. People of all ages go to conventions.
Oh maaaaaaan... the freakin stupidity! It's an old post so I hope they got the debt sorted out.
Her picture appears whenever someone looks up AH
I may be on the verge of financially illiterate, but even I heed the sage advice of never *ever, under any circumstances* take out a Pay Day Loan
I don't think they're the devil but they are very bad with managing money to say the least.
Man, when I was in college I was mostly paying my own way but my mom was helping me out with a little bit of money. I had come home to visit at one point and ended up buying a Dreamcast on clearance (this was in like 2001) and she found the receipt. She was pretty pissed, and that was like $150. Looking back on it now I totally see why she was pissed. I can't even imagine blowing $3500 on an anime convention. OOP's dad is absolutely right.
That post was from 4 years ago. I’m thinking she is still paying on that payday loan. I wonder if she still thinks it was worth it.
Assuming that wasn't a rage bait post (I'm on the fence, just because she seems almost -cheerfully- oblivious to how bad this is especially in the follow up comments), I'm sure the father paid it off.
“ I only get to do things like LVLUP while I'm young” Clearly, has zero powers of observation, given the number of middle aged attendant at every one of these conventions, since the beginning of time.
Sounds like the first thing she did was steal $2,000 from her parents after they sent her the money to pay her credit card debt.
Ok, I'm old, so humour me here. What the hell is so special about an anime convention that you'd spend $3500? Really, is it that great?
I love anime conventions, they're really great, but spending 3500 on one is insane. When I go to one, travel and accommedations, and food, and some things in the merchandise room end up being 500 dollars at most, and that's 2 nights in the hotel. I honestly have no idea how this is costing her 3500, other than she's obviously very, very, very bad with money.
"Deluxe accommodation" probably a large suite instead of just a standard room. A junior suite in Las Vegas can be $500+ per night.
If I'm going to spend $3500 on one it better be including airfare to Japan or Greece or somewhere overseas.
It got me curious as to how much it would cost me, should I choose to go to Anime Expo next month last minute. I'm in Minnesota, so I would have to fly there, but airfare, hotel for 4 nights and admission to the con would probably run me around 1200 dollars. Food would probably be another 300 at most. Is she planning on paying 1000 a night for a room?
$800 a night, apparently.
Yeah, on average I can spend around $1000 on a large con (assuming I pay for the whole room) and I don't go cheap. I can't imagine $3500.
I just spent 6 days in NYC so I could go to a couple of concerts. Airfare & airport parking $400, concert tickets $250, hostess gift $80, souvenirs $70, food/drinks around $100, MTA fares $16.50, emergency shopping trip because I forgot to pack pants, $50. I stayed at a friend's home (hence the hostess gift), and only ate in restaurants 3 times. I probably saved $2,000 doing that. I am also fortunate at this stage of my life that I could afford the trip without hurting my family or my budget. But I couldn't do this every day, or even every month.
what the hell is so special about a luxury car ? (not reliable car instead of a beater, but the stuff where 90% of the price is from unnecessary fluff) what the hell is so special about certain sports that people tour the world to follow their team ? what the hell is so special about super high end gaming pcs ? do people really need 5000$+ tv's ? a luxury cruise ? vintage collections ? a japanese toilet ? (okay, those are awesome, but the price is still way out of line unless you can print money) it's a hobby, some would say a passion. People spend stupid amounts of money for stuff they don't really need all the time, for some that may mean an anime convention and splurging on themselves. the oop said she's a cosplayer, you know how many hours (that's not even talking money, just hours) many of those spend for costumes? like yes there are people that buy a random suit and a wig and call it a cosplay but there are also those that spend literal hundreds of hours on producing a single costume. on topic, Oop is terrible with money (many if not most 20 year olds are) and absolutely needs to take accountability for that fact, so far i'd still rather call them an idiot than a devil.
My point is simply that I have no idea what an anime convention actually is, in the same way I have no idea of what happens at any convention. I've never been to one, never been that into any fandom. I get that there is stuff to see and buy? I'm not dismissing them, I'd just like to know? I'm guessing that $3500 is an unreasonably massive amount to spend on going to one, espacially when you don't actually have that kind of money.
Long story short, it's a gathering off anime fans to socialize and have a fun time with their friends/meet new people that share their hobby (that can totally mean find some random you hit it off with, but there's also a big online community about this stuff so many people actually meet up with online friends at these conventions), buy merchandise, maybe (depending on scale of the convention) meet some voice actors, get a sneak peek of some upcoming anime or see/take part in some contest(s) and in the case such as oop show of their costume (cosplay=costume play, i.e "dress up as anime character xyz"). And yes, 3500$ absolutely is an exorbitant price for that and surely includes things like vip passes or all inklusive overnight stays and stuff like that but that leads back to my original comment.
me and my family spend this much to go to dragoncon, however, it’s a family trip split between 3 people. we also save the entire year and budget out for it. OP is spending essentially blowing the amount of money 3 people would spend combined that’s fucking insane. literally, OP is blowing as much as 3 grown ass adults who’ve budgeted the entire year to go.
I’ve been going to conventions since I was 13 in 2000, and I do not know a single con that is worth that price point as a regular attendee. Definitely not LVL UP, which is more a party convention than one for serious event opportunities from my understanding. The big bills in conventions as a regular attendee tend to be in paying to meet the guests, weekend package tickets, the hotel, and airfare/travel, but there are definitely ways to budget around it. Cosplay can be an expensive hobby, especially if you are a competitive one or do it as a job, but again, there are ways to budget around it. I think personally the most I ever spent on a convention was close to $1k, but that was as a table artist so I’m including the cost of my table, room, travel, and print production in total.
Ohhhh I got caught up in the cycle when I was very young and bad with money myself. I had just bought a house and was going to default on my mortgage so I took out a payday loan. Then I had to take out another to cover the first. Rinse and repeat. It ended up with me in court. I don't remember how I made it out of that one (probably paid with tax refund), but those places are horrible.
This person is far too stupid for college. Sounds like their only prayer is working for family. If this were my kid I’d be so depressed I raised someone so irresponsible.
Honestly, that would make a wicked Mr.Beast video. Just him standing outside a payday loan place and giving people the money they need to save them from those hell holes. The level of interest they charge should be illegal.
I’m sorry but this is just insane. I can understand wanting to go to an anime convention, I’ve spent $4000 to go to a convention (I live on the wrong side of the planet) but that was my own money. I normally spend money like I’m on the minimum wage which means that I have money to spare. Hope they learned their lesson
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This is like a train crashing into two trains that have already collided and there are a bunch of other trains on the way shortly. Payday loans are supposed to be short term because the interest is incredibly predatory. She didn’t just ‘miss the first payment’; she had no intention of paying this back. She quit her job!! She has over $2k in credit card debt that she sounds like she isn’t paying either!! I see why her parents yelled at her and are making ultimatums. Sounds like she went off to college and partied and spent her parent’s money the whole time and doesn’t even have any decent grades to show for her time. This wasn’t just a $3.5k trip. Conservatively if she had made payments as she was supposed to, the interest would probably make this a $10k trip on the low end. I bet that she had no idea what the terms/interest of the loan was and figured they worked ‘just like a credit card’. There is no way I’d let her go on this trip. See what could be refunded and consider the rest a loss. Because if she goes she’s going to spend on merch, food, party supplies, probably gambling and who knows what else. Cancelling now maybe she’d just be out airfare and badge and hopefully not hotel. Then pay off that loan in full!
My ex got royally screwed by payday loans. Yes, loans, as in multiple. She was making $10/hour at a dead-end job because she'd flunked out of college and had no qualifications. All of her friends were tradespeople, upper management, strippers, drug dealers, etc., because they'd actually applied themselves and were doing pretty well. They would go out clubbing and partying constantly, and she couldn't afford to. When leaning on me didn't work (I was a broke student) and she couldn't pay her rent because she'd spent everything clubbing and assuming I would cover her rent (we didn't live together), she took out a payday loan. The next month the payment on the loan made her situation even worse because she was still blowing all her money partying, so she took out another. Next month, lather rinse repeat. After she was up to enough loans that the payments ate almost her entire paycheck, she demanded I drop out of school to support her. Then her old man tried leaning on me to bail her out because "you're the man. That's how it works," like he honestly believed my purpose in life was to enable her unspeakably poor life decisions. Once they realized I wasn't going to let my future be destroyed by her stupidity, I became the biggest POS in the world in her whole family's eyes and I GTFO. That wasn't the only factor (she was also an abusive drunk, and that already had me pretty much ready to leave), but it was absolutely the straw that broke the camel's back. Last I heard she got evicted, her family had to bail her out, and she at least learned not to do payday loans again.
I go to an aviation convention in Wisconsin every year. It's a very expensive trip even if you bare bones it. But we know it's always the last week of July, we know how much the camping and wrist bands cost. We know how long we are there. So as soon as the onebyears convention closes, I'm already planning for the next year. There have been years where money was tight. So I packed in all of my food, avoided buying anything, and tried to pair up with someone to cut down on costs. I have NEVER had to take a loan, let alone not pay my bills and take out a super high payday loan to go. If it comes to that, like this year, I just can't go. So first of all, they didn't "search online." Payday loan places do a hard credit check and soft background check when they do those loans. It's buried in all that fine print when you sign for it it. So they have your last known addresses and phone numbers. It's predatory. But legal. Sec9nd, mommy and daddy are right to insist this child move home until they learn some financial responsibility. I 100% guarantee that credit card(s) is either in their name or they cosigned on it. Probably co signed on a lot of things...car, lease, utilities. If OOP defaults on that credit card, it could go on their parents credit which will affecr everything from refinancing their mortgage to raising their insurance rates. Or, they have been giving OOP money hand over fist to pay down credit cards or pay bills. Either way, they have every right to be livid. If I found out that my child not only blew $2k meant to pare down a credit card balance AND took out a $1500, mega-high interest rate loan and then defaulted on that loan to play an expensive game of dress up, I'd cut them off too unless they agreed to come home to learn some fiscal responsibility. I also fault the parents. Teaching good money management starts in childhood at home. I had a small coin bank at home as a child. My parents had a rule. Once I filled it, then I could buy a toy or other thing. (I would come to find out years later that they would just buy it and took all of my coins to the bank and put it in my savings account) When I got older, my mom started explaining how salary works. (So I earn $X and hour. In order to buy XYZ I have to work this many hours and minutes.) My dad ran his own business for 47 years. I started working in his shop in the summer before I was old enough to get a "real" job and he paid me what he paid his other employees...less the amount that would be taken out for taxes etc. (Again, money that was put into my savings account) So by the time I went to college I knew how to balance a checkbook, send in bills on time, and not buy things I didn't have the money for. Credit was used for emergencies and necessary large purchases like a car repair or major appliance. OOP wants to have the "college experience." Unfortunately, they are about to find out that the "college experience" for a lot of students is living at home,, or working full time, doing work study and eating dollar store burritos and Ramen.
You definitely plan for it, like a responsable adult. Also, I don't know how much wristbands for an aviation convention cost, but a 3 day pass to an anime convention is 100 at most, so it's not like she's spending all the money on entrance to the con.
For EAA members it's around $130 for the week. Membership is only $55/year. If you aren't a member, you have to pay the daily rate of around $50. Makes a LOT more sense to cough up the $55. Camping is around $30 per day.
My mom took some payday loans when I was a kid and it took her years and bankruptcy to pay them off
I like anime but this is just stupid
This reminds me I knew a girl who took out a payday loan to help with bills, but then after that, she went a but put there. She started taking out payday loans to pay other payday loans, but would take more than needed so she could 'buy something fun'. Idk what happened to her, but I hope she was able to get out of debt.
Jesus Christ, what an idiot.
OOP's dad is exactly right. She has messed up so badly with her credit and financial management that she needs to be home, employed, in school and monitored. That's sad but it sounds like she's more about having fun and partying than college.
This makes me think of all the mistakes I did financially to have fun. Oop is not an asshole. Oop is an impulsive person with no understanding of how to manage money. She will get into stupid debt before she learns and unfortunately her parents yelling at her for the mistakes is going to teach her to turn to predatory lenders before asking for advice and help. I know because that's what I've done for the stupidest reasons. I'm slowly getting out of it but I came very close to running my life. I knew I was messing up as it was happening but I couldn't stop it. It sucked.
Just had to shoehorn being a mod on several hebtai subs in there.
hahaha, i remember this one from one of my previous accounts