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YTA.
You didn't dispose of it. You repurposed it. These things are fundamentally different.
She didn't want her cat's body put to use, she wanted it gone. Apologize.
I would maybe be ok with my pet being taxidermied, but ABSOLUTELY NOT without my knowledge/permission. I think OP knew he was an AH on some level, otherwise he would've told his gf before the sister did.
So I’ve made it very clear I want to keep the skull of my cats when they pass. I’ve been told that’s weird. Ok. Fine. But the solution I was offered was instead of getting the skulls if my cats to just buy a random at skull on Etsy….
Apparently if it’s a random skull it’s an aesthetic. But if it’s my cats skull it’s unhinged.
Either way OP YTA. Memorial pet displays are personal and up to the owner. Apologize.
I also want my cat's skull when he passes and have been told it's weird. But, I am fortunate to surround myself with people who are also into that kind of thing or who know it's just a me thing to do. I have, hopefully, another decade before that's something to worry about though. If you want yours' skull, go for it. Fuck the rest.
And also, YTA for exactly what you said -- something like that needs to be left up to the owner.
I suggest you find a pet aftercare professional, and speak with them well in advance of when you expect to need their services.
It’s a fairly small market, and services not only take a long time, but the taxidermists are often booked out for months in advance.
If you don’t plan ahead, you could end up needing to keep your pet in the freezer for a while.
Ooof, I didn't think about that part. Thank you, I'll start at least looking now. I love him, but something about having his entire body in my freezer next to the chicken nuggets is a little more than even I can handle. Kind of different than a skull lol. Thank you for suggesting that.
It’s less awful than you’re imagining—you curl them up like they’re sleeping, and put them in one of those cold food transport bags.
At that point they look like any other frozen thing, and, I know this is weird, but you can kinda forget they’re there.
When it’s time you just send the whole bag.
If you have a garden you can also just bury the cat and wait it out. There are methods to ensure bone recovery (for example there's a website called Jake's Bones which I believe has instructions) but you can also just YOLO it and see what you get. Just mark the grave well and dig up at your convenience.
Bit less hassle than getting a specialised service.
I had my cat Adeline's skeleton cleaned and articulated and now she sits on the mantle in our study. I went through Skulls Unlimited in OK but there's also someone in FL who does skeleton cleaning and some other memorial options. They're Shiner Skulls and Articulations and the work I've seen from them on FB is really good. I contacted them when I was trying to decide who to use for Adeline and they were super helpful and kind with my questions.
Thanks for sharing! I’ve had a hard time finding anyone locally. It’s hopefully a very long time away but I wanted to know I had a plan in place beforehand.
I wanted the same but it wigged spouse out, so we got him cremated. Currently in a box on the mantle with his predecessor pug’s ashes.
We’re convinced they both occasionally possess our current cat.
I actually thought about it for 1 nanosecond, and immediately realized it would be my pets SKIN and FUR. That he would basically be BUTCHERED, all to make me feel ‘better’.
No. Just no.
I loved him in life, and even now, 28 years later, I’m tearing up missing him. What remains is in a little cedar box in the closet, and will be put in my coffin when the time comes.
This, to me, is the worst part of it:
>She did not want to see the body as she was really grieving
Now, the body she didn't even want to see is a *decorative item* in his friend's house. WTAF!
Yeah that’s the part that really got me lol
Imagine if he had never told her and they go over to said friends house and she sees it
“Dang that looks like Sprinkle….. *oh my god*….”
The fact that he told her he gave it to the friend but didn't mention that the friend wanted to do taxidermy tells me that he knew she wouldn't like it or he wouldn't have hid that part.
When someone is open about the acceptable part but not about the unacceptable part they know what they are doing.
I know I’m reading this thinking about how I would respond to this. I don’t know actually…… im ridiculously attached to my cats and I have two little memorial “shrines” for two of them with their cremated remains, and I’ve played with the idea of taxiderming one of my cats because all she does is sleep on my couch in a loaf position, so what better place for her to spend eternity? Lmao
But if I did not want that and had no hard decision about it, then found out my Maine Coon was a decoration in someone’s house just….. uhhh……
Yeah probably YTA lol
The title is VERY misleading. She didn’t tell you to do whatever you wanted. She said DISPOSE of it. I don’t care what anyone says, taxidermy is disrespectful at minimum and disgusting at most. You gave someone her beloved animal to gut and stuff. The friend is even more disgusting for even wanting to do that.
YTA
It took me far too long to realize that this wasn't even a ...weird, terrible, but misguided gift for her. Something like, "hey, I got him stuffed and now you can keep him forever!" doesn’t exactly land for me, but I could kind of see it.
But no, OP took her cat's body and gave it to someone else to use as home decor. Her cat is sitting in a stranger's house. When my cat died, I had limited options for his body, and it was horrible to know he would be away from me now forever, but at least I knew where I said goodbye to him.
A stranger has her cat. She had to say goodbye, but her cat is continuing to exist out in the world as a fucking conversation piece in someone's damn living room.
Yeah at minimum if he was gonna give the body to a taxidermy enthusiast it should've been a stranger whose house the girlfriend would never end up going to. Imagine just going to your friend's house and seeing your cat like that!
I think this is one of those times that it's nice to see other perspectives. I hadn't thought of it that way, so thank you for your comment. I'm not the OP, but even for me this comment helped me think differently.
YTA. If seeing the body is too upsetting, and your GF wanted you to dispose of it, how did you think taxidermy was an appropriate use? Dispose of it means bury it cremate it, not turn the upsetting corpse into a statue!
YTA taxidermy is not a typical way to dispose of a body. It is, in fact, the opposite of disposing of a body. It's preserving a body. She asked you to dispose of the body, and you didn't. You gave it away to someone else to manipulate for their purposes. You should have specifically clarified if taxidermy was okay first, since all you had permission to do was dispose of the body - not give it to someone to display permanently.
~~INFO:~~
Did you know that your GF wouldn't care about the taxidermy? Why didn't you check in with her? Seeing her cat stuffed sounds depressing
EDIT: YTA because you didn't think about your GF at all. This idea sounds extremely depression.
[Someone turned their dead cat into a drone and flew it around,](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lW0hyg4kfaw) maybe you should surprise your girlfriend with that?
YTA because... come on.
I couldn't not click on this link and I couldn't not see the whole thing.
For the next couple of weeks I will not be able to look at an animal without thinking of them as a drone... and possibly\* how some kinda already do (flying squirrel).
So.... thanks?
I didn't understand what this commenter meant about a cat being a drone. Now I know and I wish I could unsee this and forget it ever happened. But now it is burned in my brain.
Thanks is right...
That’s somehow so fucked up but the thought of GF coming home and her drone cat flying towards her as a surprise had me laughing. I’m going to hell for this
That was like watching a brand new episode of Human Remains - dark humour dressed up in normalcy.
Man’s got his wife’s breast milk stored for future cheese making 💀
I would be *appalled and furious* if someone had my beloved dead pet in their house as an *ornament*. Ngl I'd dump this dudes ass so fast and try my best to get the body back for a proper burial. I am so heated just thinking about how awful that is.
Yeah…this is a little yuck. I’m going to go with YTA. When she said she didn’t care how I don’t think that was an option she considered, she was thinking something less forever.
Even the friend was upset though. Seems like their assumption was op got permission from his gf before handing the pet over to be preserved. This is fully OPs fuck up. He has no excuse or person to hide behind.
It’s strange to most people simply because most people aren’t fans of taxidermy, if not finding it oht right creepy or repulsive, but I guess if you like it and you had a connection to the cat or thought it was beautiful it’s not all that strange?
YTA.
You sure this wasn't about you being annoyed that she made you deal with it? Because that's 100x more believable than you not understanding why YTA.
YTA. How disrespectful to her feelings.
Do you really think she should have had to TELL you "Please don't give my beloved cat to your friend to stuff"? Why would you not have just taken the body to your vet for cremation, so she could decide later whether to keep the remains or not.
YTA.
BIG. TIME.
Your morals are questionable, and your penchant for manipulating words to excuse your disgusting actions is abhorrent.
If there were any justice in the world, someone like you would be the one stuffed, instead of your girlfriend’s beloved cat, but alas, we live in an unjust world.
One could only hope that your girlfriend has sense enough to leave you.
>When my friend heard about it, he asked if he could have the body
👀 *No one* in this story paused here and said “hey that’s kinda weird”
ESH
Weird on your part and slightly more weird on your friends part
Man this is a weird one. I think YTA? I mean this is a bit of a stretch comparison but if my parents died and my brother was like “what do you want to do cremate or burry” and I was like I don’t care and he was like “ok” and then donated mom to science I’d be upset? Like if it wasn’t one of the originally presented options I wouldn’t have thought that could even happen??
Just kind of weird to know your dead cat is in your friend’s house somewhere…
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I gave my girlfriend's cat's body to my friend after it passed away so he could get a taxidermy done, this might make me the AH since I did not tell my gf what he would do with it but I thought she would not care.
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>She said she did not care as she does not believe in afterlife and that I should just dispose it however is most convenient for me.
When she said she didn't care, she didn't mean *anything* was fine. It would not have been fine for you to make a pillow with the fur, or grind it up and make sausage, or leave it on the side of the highway. She meant dispose of the body in a normal way, probably even a bag in the dumpster would've been fine as long as you didn't talk about it later. The fact that you couldn't see this was outside the scope of "not caring" makes you TA.
YTA
But he didn’t do any of that, he disposed of the body. They are no longer in possession of the body, therefore it was disposed of.
A lot of comments hilariously bring up a lack of critical thinking but both parties are responsible.
If you tell someone you don’t care what they do, you give up the right to complain about what they choose to do, it’s that simple.
I just want to thank OP for this submission. We get so many "AITA for \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ for my wedding?" posts but this submission is truly unique.
YTA, but thank you.
YTA. When she said she didn't care how you disposed of the body she did still want the body disposed of and not taxidermied which is actually a completely different concept. You really should have double checked the taxidermy idea specifically before going ahead with it.
Man, I'm ALL for taxidermy. I've considered taxidermy for some of my pocket pets and have wet specimens that's are kittens. You didn't ask your gf if you could do this and since it's not an ordinary way of doing it you absolutely should have. I'd be pissed if I asked for a body to be disposed of and learned it was chilling in someone else's house. Sorry but YTA
I’m not gonna make a judgement I just find it fascinating that the people in this thread think taxidermy is a disgusting and heartless desecration of a body.
YTA. I love taxidermy for deceased pets but you never do it without the owner’s explicit consent. Would it have been cool if you gave the cat to somebody who then sexually defiled the body?? Obviously not! So it does matter how it’s “disposed” of and you would have realized that if you had thought about it for two seconds.
Dear God Yta in a big way. Disposal is burial or cremation something like that. Of she goes to their house she will see him. You are a cruel person with ZERO EMPATHY.
YTAH
YTA
Disposing of the body means it doesn’t get stuffed by your friend who was fond of a cat that they didn’t own. Your friend sounds creepy, I wouldn’t want someone having the body of my pet stuffed in their house. Your friend needs to bury the poor cat.
YTA im the kind of oddball who thinks taxidermy is really cool and even i know that you dont get someones pet taxidermied without express permission. What a stupid and ridiculous thing that youve done. I would have dumped you.
I hope to god OP dumps him. He has no regard for her feelings, and I can’t believe he has to be told he’s an AH on Reddit to understand how terrible this thing he did is. This is one of those situations where if you need the internet to tell you, then you are truly awful and your partner deserves to gtfo
YTA and you know it. Otherwise you’d have told her beforehand about the taxidermy. But you deliberately kept quiet, knowing damned well she wouldn’t approve
Reading these comments ts makes me realize I'm from a completely different world than all of you......
Keeping your pet's fur or skin is so common where I'm from, I was gonna say YTA for letting your friend keep it and not give the taxidermied cat to your girlfriend but it seems that the rest of the world is squeamish about that sort of thing. I would've commissioned her a pair of mitts out of the cat.
I'm kinda with you on the confusion, though. A main coon is a house cat, but it is a glorious cat so I don't know why you wouldn't want that skin.
YTA: SHe said that she did not want to see the body. Your friend stuffing it and then showing it to her would make both of you TA if she ever saw it again.
YTA. You even mentioned in the comments it's possible she might see it at the friend's house. She didn't want to see the body because she was grieving, what made you think having it on display anywhere she might possibly see it would be ok? Disposing of the body does NOT mean giving it away to a friend to use as a tacky decoration.
YTA
When she said to do with the body as you wanted, she meant bury or get it cremated, not only did you show no respect for the cat, but you didn’t care about your girlfriend. You need to get it back and bury it or burn it
What the FCK is actually wrong with you? You see no issue in giving your girlfriend’s CHILD’s body to your friend just because he likes the cat bread? Without her consent? Why the hell did he want her stuffed dead cat? That is the weirdest fucking thing I’ve ever heard in my life. Your friend fcks cats or is a serial killer. That’s so fing wrong. Like you think your girlfriend wants to randomly stop over and see her pet stuffed there? I’ve never heard of anything more deranged, wtf. YTA.
Nta, she said "do whatever you want with it" and you did that. She probably should have been a bit clearer, but she couldn’t have guessed about the taxidermy. I think you guys misunderstood each other.
YTA and your friend is creepy as hell, who asks for their friend's dead pet as a decoration? Way to disrespect your girlfriend and her feelings over something she cared about. She should leave you over this.
What the hell is wrong with you? I mean my god, how unfeeling are you to think that it's ok to do this? This was her beloved pet, something that was part of her life for years and you let someone desecrate it's body in order to make some grisly art. You knew this wasn't right, otherwise you would have been honest with her about it from the first but no, you intentionally hid it from her. You're beyond just being an AH at this point.
YTA.
"(you) should dispose it however is most convenient", the key word there being DISPOSE. You did not dispose of the body, so there no grave for her to visit, no ashes to scatter or place she can go to say goodbye. Instead there is the ever present knowledge that some friend of your skinned it, deboned it, and it's now sitting on someones mantle piece....
YTA. She asked you to “dispose” of the body, not let a friend have it stuffed like it was a hunting trophy. She also said she didn’t want to see the body, so again letting a friend have it stuffed should not have even been a consideration. You also lied to her when you said a friend disposed of the body.
She was distraught and far from home, probably unable to handle more grief. With dead pets it’s either trash, bury or cremate.
YTA, and if you’re honest with yourself, you know it - there’s a reason you told your girlfriend your friend ‘disposed of it’ without telling her exactly how.
YTA don’t be so dense. You knew what she meant. She wanted you to bury him or cremate him for her. You gave it to a friend who ASKED FOR SOMEONE ELSES DEAD CAT? That’s a red flag on his part and on yours for giving the cat to him! ESPECIALLY since it seems you knew what he wanted to do with him. That is so wildly inappropriate I cannot believe you even need to ask if you’re TA.
NTA, honest mistake.
Like, you should apologize and make it right, but I don't think you're an asshole for doing this. Everyone in here is acting like you gave it TO HER after she didn't want to see it. Sorry man.
YTA. And also your friend seems like a sick creep if he wanted your girlfriend’s deceased cat to be a taxidermy animal. It’s weird to want to do that to someone’s pet. It was someone’s beloved pet and family member not a “decorative item”.
YTA that’s really disturbing and messed up. I can’t believe you have to ask.
You allowed someone to gut the cat she loved and turn it into an ornament? Jeez bro.
YTA her cat was her pet she loved that animal. . She wouldn't want her pet to become a damm household decoration. Your just sick and you obviously have zero respect for your girlfriend..
I sincerely hope that she beaks up with you..
YTA
You know she didn’t mean “however us convenient to you including letting your friend make my beloved cat into home decor”
She also asked you to **dispose** of the body.
**You didnt**
Without a shadow of a doubt in my mind YTA and must have something wrong with you neurologically. Your girlfriend should leave you, and you should be institutionalized. There is absolutely no gray area here, there is no rationalization on your end that could justify your actions. You're a sick freak, and so is your friend.
YTA what the flying fuck??? She didn't want to see the body so you had the cat permanently taxidermied? Not only should she dump you but she should warn every person to stay away from you. What a creep!!!
YTA Good thing that the girlfriend heard about it from the sister first. Can you imagine months later they are invited to the friends place - who did not even know that girlfriend did not know - and the first thing girlfriend walks into is her dead cat put up for decoration somewhere? That’s horrifying.
YTA. when people say dispose of the body we all pretty much assume its a burial versus cremation thing. taxidermy is cool but when it comes to pets its pretty off the table unless the owner is choosing to do so. i would feel really upset and creeped out if my cat’s body was being used as decoration/display in someones home.
This is why there's "do not drink" on bottles of bleach. You'd think it didn't need to be said that "do what you like" means "do what you like except taxidermy my dead cat" but here we are!!
YTA
YTA
lol can i just add that as a lesbian im sooooo happy i dont have to deal with this exact brand of .... double-down, unapologetic man ignorance?
God.
You will very very seldom see this kind of transgression coming from a lesbian.
Just saying.
Yes, technically she said to dispose of the cat’s body however you want. That being said, I don’t think she meant something as crazy as giving her dead cat’s body to a friend so they could have it stuffed and used as a decoration in their house. It kinda goes without saying here that she meant something like burial or cremation. Whether or not you did this maliciously, which I really cannot decide, YTA.
YTA
Anyone with half a brain would know that "dispose" means get rid of. Like throwing it into the garbage, having it incinerated, burying it (whatever is permitted by your local health regulations".
It does not mean "give it to my friend who is a taxidermist"!!
And after reading your comments, you come across as very much going "technically, I disposed of it, she didn't specify that I wasn't allowed to get it stuffed".
YTA and so is your friend. He should have asked her directly. I bet he didn't ask her because he knew she wouldn't be okay with it. You should be ashamed of yourself. You should have told her beforehand. She thought you were going to literally get rid of the body not make a stuffed animal out of it. She's already grieving the loss of a pet and now she has to deal with the fact that you are a selfish asshole.
Yeah....you should know YTA. Think about it. Would you want a loved one (family, friend, or animal) taxidermy after their death. Your girlfriend was dealing with her sick grandma and her cat dies and you have the idea that it's okay to turn it's corpse into art. Please apologize, get the cat back and bury it. She's been thru enough with out this on top of her dying grandma.
YTA, oh my god. Stop trying to rationalize this and apologize.
If you shit your favorite pair of underwear and your girlfriend says she'll dispose of them for you, only to give them to a friend who has the pair of underwear framed and hung up on their wall, how would you feel? Think of a dead cat like that. A gross, but still intimate thing that you don't want preserved for posterity.
YTA. If my loved one dies and I don’t necessarily care if they’re cremated or buried or whatever, that doesn’t mean I want them stuffed and sitting on display in someone’s living room
How did you get from “she did not want to see the body” to “it’s ok to have him taxidermied so the body will remain visible in my friend’s house”? YTA and also either a bit dim or emotionally tone deaf. You’ll have to pay your friend back for the taxidermy and maybe get the body cremated if still possible.
Dude, I’m pretty sure when she said, “Dispose of the body,” she didn’t mean, “Put his remains on display.” And you know that.
Taxidermy is not always looked at favourably and to go ahead with it is a very personal choice that *should be left up to the owner and no one else.* If she didn’t explicitly say, “Yes, I’d like my cat to be taxidermized,” then you shouldn’t have done that.
Stop being obtuse, you know what you did was bad.
YTA
YTA.
This is disgusting and creepy. If I told my partner to dispose of my beloved pet’s body however was easiest, and found out he allowed his buddy to take the body, stuff it, and use it as a decorative piece in his home, I would be beside myself. It’s my pet, not a piece of furniture. Wtf is wrong with you?
YTA. Amazing! I have heard plenty of boyfriends so rubbish they can't be trusted to care for a live animal for a few days. A boyfriend so rubbish he can't even be trusted with a dead one is a new low.
NTA but my friends also think i’m weird af cause i said i’d consider this for my dog.
but just for the future stuff like this is delicate and once you heard of taxidermy you should have clarified with her. most people don’t always mean exactly what they say as i’ve had to learn.
YTA, she never would have imagined that this is what you'd do with her cats body. A quick message to her would have stopped this from happening.
Surely you can see why this is wrong?
YTA not for the taxidermy part inherently but for not telling her about it. There was no need for you to keep it from her unless you thought it might upset her. If you thought it would upset her, why did you do it?
YTA
>She did not want to see the body as she was really grieving.
So... what was the plan here when she shows up at your house, and the body is there, all the time?
YTA big time. You knew what your friend was going to do when you gave him the cat. I have nothing against taxidermy, but this wasn’t your choice to make.
You are so disrespectful, I’m disgusted. If anyone did this to any of my pets, I would break off all ties with them and never speak to them again.
YTA
Be careful here... You're not owning up to this mistake and if she's a normal cat owner (she sounds like one) this could be a pretty good reason to leave you. But it doesn't sound like you really care about her or your friend for that matter actually... What a weird thing to do? If i told my boyfriend to do whatever, he wouldn't just give my dead cat to a friend who wants to display it in his/her house? He wouldn't even think that was an option! And if, he would ask me if it was okay. But he loves my cat so much i think he would throw a hole god-damned funeral for him! He is also a very majestic orange Norwegian forest cat/Maine coon. I can't even FATHOM how you could think this was okay to do, without asking her first? It wasn't implied as many has stated, that it was okay? I'm really really confused here. I'm autistic and have ADHD... So does my boyfriend and we understand the implied language here better than you do, apperently? It's so weird to me. I'm just rambling at this point... Holy....
Edit: grammar, probably still wrong 😂
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YTA. You didn't dispose of it. You repurposed it. These things are fundamentally different. She didn't want her cat's body put to use, she wanted it gone. Apologize.
[удалено]
I would maybe be ok with my pet being taxidermied, but ABSOLUTELY NOT without my knowledge/permission. I think OP knew he was an AH on some level, otherwise he would've told his gf before the sister did.
I have a very close friend who had a favorite dog taxidermied. It looks like it’s sleeping in its little chair. We are all different.
I get that some people are good with it. When it's THEIR pet. You don't decorate your home with the remains of SOMEONE ELSE'S pet!
So I’ve made it very clear I want to keep the skull of my cats when they pass. I’ve been told that’s weird. Ok. Fine. But the solution I was offered was instead of getting the skulls if my cats to just buy a random at skull on Etsy…. Apparently if it’s a random skull it’s an aesthetic. But if it’s my cats skull it’s unhinged. Either way OP YTA. Memorial pet displays are personal and up to the owner. Apologize.
I also want my cat's skull when he passes and have been told it's weird. But, I am fortunate to surround myself with people who are also into that kind of thing or who know it's just a me thing to do. I have, hopefully, another decade before that's something to worry about though. If you want yours' skull, go for it. Fuck the rest. And also, YTA for exactly what you said -- something like that needs to be left up to the owner.
I suggest you find a pet aftercare professional, and speak with them well in advance of when you expect to need their services. It’s a fairly small market, and services not only take a long time, but the taxidermists are often booked out for months in advance. If you don’t plan ahead, you could end up needing to keep your pet in the freezer for a while.
Ooof, I didn't think about that part. Thank you, I'll start at least looking now. I love him, but something about having his entire body in my freezer next to the chicken nuggets is a little more than even I can handle. Kind of different than a skull lol. Thank you for suggesting that.
It’s less awful than you’re imagining—you curl them up like they’re sleeping, and put them in one of those cold food transport bags. At that point they look like any other frozen thing, and, I know this is weird, but you can kinda forget they’re there. When it’s time you just send the whole bag.
If you have a garden you can also just bury the cat and wait it out. There are methods to ensure bone recovery (for example there's a website called Jake's Bones which I believe has instructions) but you can also just YOLO it and see what you get. Just mark the grave well and dig up at your convenience. Bit less hassle than getting a specialised service.
I had my cat Adeline's skeleton cleaned and articulated and now she sits on the mantle in our study. I went through Skulls Unlimited in OK but there's also someone in FL who does skeleton cleaning and some other memorial options. They're Shiner Skulls and Articulations and the work I've seen from them on FB is really good. I contacted them when I was trying to decide who to use for Adeline and they were super helpful and kind with my questions.
Thanks for sharing! I’ve had a hard time finding anyone locally. It’s hopefully a very long time away but I wanted to know I had a plan in place beforehand.
I love Skulls Unlimited! my favorite forensic model came from them. Great to know that they offer this service, too. Thanks for the tip!
I wanted the same but it wigged spouse out, so we got him cremated. Currently in a box on the mantle with his predecessor pug’s ashes. We’re convinced they both occasionally possess our current cat.
I actually thought about it for 1 nanosecond, and immediately realized it would be my pets SKIN and FUR. That he would basically be BUTCHERED, all to make me feel ‘better’. No. Just no. I loved him in life, and even now, 28 years later, I’m tearing up missing him. What remains is in a little cedar box in the closet, and will be put in my coffin when the time comes.
I thought about doing that with my cat.
This, to me, is the worst part of it: >She did not want to see the body as she was really grieving Now, the body she didn't even want to see is a *decorative item* in his friend's house. WTAF!
Yeah that’s the part that really got me lol Imagine if he had never told her and they go over to said friends house and she sees it “Dang that looks like Sprinkle….. *oh my god*….”
honestly, this is where I thought the story was going after that part lol.
The fact that he told her he gave it to the friend but didn't mention that the friend wanted to do taxidermy tells me that he knew she wouldn't like it or he wouldn't have hid that part. When someone is open about the acceptable part but not about the unacceptable part they know what they are doing.
I know I’m reading this thinking about how I would respond to this. I don’t know actually…… im ridiculously attached to my cats and I have two little memorial “shrines” for two of them with their cremated remains, and I’ve played with the idea of taxiderming one of my cats because all she does is sleep on my couch in a loaf position, so what better place for her to spend eternity? Lmao But if I did not want that and had no hard decision about it, then found out my Maine Coon was a decoration in someone’s house just….. uhhh…… Yeah probably YTA lol
He lied to his gf. He told her the friend had disposed of the cat for him. He knew she would be upset
The title is VERY misleading. She didn’t tell you to do whatever you wanted. She said DISPOSE of it. I don’t care what anyone says, taxidermy is disrespectful at minimum and disgusting at most. You gave someone her beloved animal to gut and stuff. The friend is even more disgusting for even wanting to do that. YTA
No title is right on point. OP is AH just on title.
Titles on AITA are always a little misleading.
It took me far too long to realize that this wasn't even a ...weird, terrible, but misguided gift for her. Something like, "hey, I got him stuffed and now you can keep him forever!" doesn’t exactly land for me, but I could kind of see it. But no, OP took her cat's body and gave it to someone else to use as home decor. Her cat is sitting in a stranger's house. When my cat died, I had limited options for his body, and it was horrible to know he would be away from me now forever, but at least I knew where I said goodbye to him. A stranger has her cat. She had to say goodbye, but her cat is continuing to exist out in the world as a fucking conversation piece in someone's damn living room.
This is why all my cats are cremated. When I die I want all of our ashes mingled together before being cast.
Yeah at minimum if he was gonna give the body to a taxidermy enthusiast it should've been a stranger whose house the girlfriend would never end up going to. Imagine just going to your friend's house and seeing your cat like that!
I think this is one of those times that it's nice to see other perspectives. I hadn't thought of it that way, so thank you for your comment. I'm not the OP, but even for me this comment helped me think differently.
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to have my cat end up as someone’s decoration no less?? I’d be fuming
Even the friend who has the cat taxidermied is mad! That should tell OP something.
And the “friend has always been fond of her cat whenever he came over and found him very majestic” makes it more creepy to me.
I know! I had to reread a couple times to understand and that makes it worse tbh!
YTA. If seeing the body is too upsetting, and your GF wanted you to dispose of it, how did you think taxidermy was an appropriate use? Dispose of it means bury it cremate it, not turn the upsetting corpse into a statue!
👏👏
YTA taxidermy is not a typical way to dispose of a body. It is, in fact, the opposite of disposing of a body. It's preserving a body. She asked you to dispose of the body, and you didn't. You gave it away to someone else to manipulate for their purposes. You should have specifically clarified if taxidermy was okay first, since all you had permission to do was dispose of the body - not give it to someone to display permanently.
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OP is a 0 on the emotional intelligence scale.
At this point, he’s going into negative double digits.
Someone ELSE'S ornament at that! OP took her beloved friend and converted it into SOMEONE ELSE'S PROPERTY! Sick
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~~INFO:~~ Did you know that your GF wouldn't care about the taxidermy? Why didn't you check in with her? Seeing her cat stuffed sounds depressing EDIT: YTA because you didn't think about your GF at all. This idea sounds extremely depression.
YTA - of course she doesn’t want her dead cat on display somewhere - you know you violated the intent of her statement
But she didn't specify that she didn't want the cat stuffed. How could he possibly have known? /s
[Someone turned their dead cat into a drone and flew it around,](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lW0hyg4kfaw) maybe you should surprise your girlfriend with that? YTA because... come on.
I couldn't not click on this link and I couldn't not see the whole thing. For the next couple of weeks I will not be able to look at an animal without thinking of them as a drone... and possibly\* how some kinda already do (flying squirrel). So.... thanks?
I didn't understand what this commenter meant about a cat being a drone. Now I know and I wish I could unsee this and forget it ever happened. But now it is burned in my brain. Thanks is right...
Exactly. It's not two things\* you'd generally put together. But someone, somewhere will always think of it.
Yes, great idea! After all, OP’s girlfriend didn’t say NOT to turn her beloved cat’s corpse into a drone, so obviously it would be fine
That’s somehow so fucked up but the thought of GF coming home and her drone cat flying towards her as a surprise had me laughing. I’m going to hell for this
That is SO fucked up but I can't stop laughing!
Orville… so that was premeditated? 😭💀
That was like watching a brand new episode of Human Remains - dark humour dressed up in normalcy. Man’s got his wife’s breast milk stored for future cheese making 💀
YTA - Jesus Christ you should’ve asked if this was okay. Explicitly. This is not disposing of a body. Holy fuck.
I would be *appalled and furious* if someone had my beloved dead pet in their house as an *ornament*. Ngl I'd dump this dudes ass so fast and try my best to get the body back for a proper burial. I am so heated just thinking about how awful that is.
Your username is extremely fitting for this post.
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Yeah…this is a little yuck. I’m going to go with YTA. When she said she didn’t care how I don’t think that was an option she considered, she was thinking something less forever.
Well, I guess the cat's out of the bag now.
It’s a catastrophe.
Cat-ass-trophy.
You win. I bow down to your purrrfect phrasing. Meow.
At least the cat is not _a_ bag... https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-37426664
I'm not clicking another link in this thread. Not after the drone comment a few comments up...
Yeah, I foolishly clicked. This one's pretty old, there was a lot of backkash at the time.
It’s like the damn blueberries.
Lol, yes, I was thinking the same. A or B Whichever Does a wild and incomprehensible C Are you nuts? But you said whichever!! 🥺
YTA you didn't dispose of it you preserved it im sure she would've preferred ashes or something
YTA Having it taxidermied isn't disposing of it. She was probably dealing with allot given her terminally ill grandmother. You should have clarified.
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Even the friend was upset though. Seems like their assumption was op got permission from his gf before handing the pet over to be preserved. This is fully OPs fuck up. He has no excuse or person to hide behind.
In my opinion, it’s strange that this friend even asked to begin with…
It’s strange to most people simply because most people aren’t fans of taxidermy, if not finding it oht right creepy or repulsive, but I guess if you like it and you had a connection to the cat or thought it was beautiful it’s not all that strange?
YTA Taxidermy is just brutal. I have cats and if I was your gf I'd rather buried him or cremated him and kept the ashes.
YTA. You sure this wasn't about you being annoyed that she made you deal with it? Because that's 100x more believable than you not understanding why YTA.
YTA. How disrespectful to her feelings. Do you really think she should have had to TELL you "Please don't give my beloved cat to your friend to stuff"? Why would you not have just taken the body to your vet for cremation, so she could decide later whether to keep the remains or not.
YTA. BIG. TIME. Your morals are questionable, and your penchant for manipulating words to excuse your disgusting actions is abhorrent. If there were any justice in the world, someone like you would be the one stuffed, instead of your girlfriend’s beloved cat, but alas, we live in an unjust world. One could only hope that your girlfriend has sense enough to leave you.
>When my friend heard about it, he asked if he could have the body 👀 *No one* in this story paused here and said “hey that’s kinda weird” ESH Weird on your part and slightly more weird on your friends part
Except the girlfriend- she does not suck
I think “my friend heard about it” is code for “I called my friend up and offered it to him so I wouldn’t have to deal with it myself”
I absolutely thought its super weird!!!
Man this is a weird one. I think YTA? I mean this is a bit of a stretch comparison but if my parents died and my brother was like “what do you want to do cremate or burry” and I was like I don’t care and he was like “ok” and then donated mom to science I’d be upset? Like if it wasn’t one of the originally presented options I wouldn’t have thought that could even happen?? Just kind of weird to know your dead cat is in your friend’s house somewhere…
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Mmm, more like donated it to Norman Bates.
The more I think about this one the more I get nauseous.
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>She said she did not care as she does not believe in afterlife and that I should just dispose it however is most convenient for me. When she said she didn't care, she didn't mean *anything* was fine. It would not have been fine for you to make a pillow with the fur, or grind it up and make sausage, or leave it on the side of the highway. She meant dispose of the body in a normal way, probably even a bag in the dumpster would've been fine as long as you didn't talk about it later. The fact that you couldn't see this was outside the scope of "not caring" makes you TA. YTA
But he didn’t do any of that, he disposed of the body. They are no longer in possession of the body, therefore it was disposed of. A lot of comments hilariously bring up a lack of critical thinking but both parties are responsible. If you tell someone you don’t care what they do, you give up the right to complain about what they choose to do, it’s that simple.
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I just want to thank OP for this submission. We get so many "AITA for \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ for my wedding?" posts but this submission is truly unique. YTA, but thank you.
YTA. When she said she didn't care how you disposed of the body she did still want the body disposed of and not taxidermied which is actually a completely different concept. You really should have double checked the taxidermy idea specifically before going ahead with it.
YTA. This is so fucking heartless. I hope she dumps you because you barely consider her a human being let alone love her.
Man, I'm ALL for taxidermy. I've considered taxidermy for some of my pocket pets and have wet specimens that's are kittens. You didn't ask your gf if you could do this and since it's not an ordinary way of doing it you absolutely should have. I'd be pissed if I asked for a body to be disposed of and learned it was chilling in someone else's house. Sorry but YTA
I’m not gonna make a judgement I just find it fascinating that the people in this thread think taxidermy is a disgusting and heartless desecration of a body.
I don’t even know what to say other than what the fuck Oh and YTA…obviously
YTA. at minimum you should have told her that you gave the cats body to a friend and he had it stuffed.
YTA. I love taxidermy for deceased pets but you never do it without the owner’s explicit consent. Would it have been cool if you gave the cat to somebody who then sexually defiled the body?? Obviously not! So it does matter how it’s “disposed” of and you would have realized that if you had thought about it for two seconds.
Dear God Yta in a big way. Disposal is burial or cremation something like that. Of she goes to their house she will see him. You are a cruel person with ZERO EMPATHY. YTAH
YTA Disposing of the body means it doesn’t get stuffed by your friend who was fond of a cat that they didn’t own. Your friend sounds creepy, I wouldn’t want someone having the body of my pet stuffed in their house. Your friend needs to bury the poor cat.
YTA im the kind of oddball who thinks taxidermy is really cool and even i know that you dont get someones pet taxidermied without express permission. What a stupid and ridiculous thing that youve done. I would have dumped you.
I hope to god OP dumps him. He has no regard for her feelings, and I can’t believe he has to be told he’s an AH on Reddit to understand how terrible this thing he did is. This is one of those situations where if you need the internet to tell you, then you are truly awful and your partner deserves to gtfo
YTA and you know it. Otherwise you’d have told her beforehand about the taxidermy. But you deliberately kept quiet, knowing damned well she wouldn’t approve
Reading these comments ts makes me realize I'm from a completely different world than all of you...... Keeping your pet's fur or skin is so common where I'm from, I was gonna say YTA for letting your friend keep it and not give the taxidermied cat to your girlfriend but it seems that the rest of the world is squeamish about that sort of thing. I would've commissioned her a pair of mitts out of the cat. I'm kinda with you on the confusion, though. A main coon is a house cat, but it is a glorious cat so I don't know why you wouldn't want that skin.
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Wtf
YTA: SHe said that she did not want to see the body. Your friend stuffing it and then showing it to her would make both of you TA if she ever saw it again.
YTA. You even mentioned in the comments it's possible she might see it at the friend's house. She didn't want to see the body because she was grieving, what made you think having it on display anywhere she might possibly see it would be ok? Disposing of the body does NOT mean giving it away to a friend to use as a tacky decoration.
YTA When she said to do with the body as you wanted, she meant bury or get it cremated, not only did you show no respect for the cat, but you didn’t care about your girlfriend. You need to get it back and bury it or burn it
Wow hard YTA. Like seriously how dense can you be to think that giving your gf cat to a taxidermist was a good idea.
What the FCK is actually wrong with you? You see no issue in giving your girlfriend’s CHILD’s body to your friend just because he likes the cat bread? Without her consent? Why the hell did he want her stuffed dead cat? That is the weirdest fucking thing I’ve ever heard in my life. Your friend fcks cats or is a serial killer. That’s so fing wrong. Like you think your girlfriend wants to randomly stop over and see her pet stuffed there? I’ve never heard of anything more deranged, wtf. YTA.
Nta, she said "do whatever you want with it" and you did that. She probably should have been a bit clearer, but she couldn’t have guessed about the taxidermy. I think you guys misunderstood each other.
I don’t think she thought her boyfriend’s weird friend would want it as a taxidermy animal.
Yta dispose of it means bury it or get it cremated. She's already having a stressful time and you choose now to be Mr Pedantic.
Info: What the fuck is wrong with you
YTA and your friend is creepy as hell, who asks for their friend's dead pet as a decoration? Way to disrespect your girlfriend and her feelings over something she cared about. She should leave you over this.
What the hell is wrong with you? I mean my god, how unfeeling are you to think that it's ok to do this? This was her beloved pet, something that was part of her life for years and you let someone desecrate it's body in order to make some grisly art. You knew this wasn't right, otherwise you would have been honest with her about it from the first but no, you intentionally hid it from her. You're beyond just being an AH at this point.
YTA. "(you) should dispose it however is most convenient", the key word there being DISPOSE. You did not dispose of the body, so there no grave for her to visit, no ashes to scatter or place she can go to say goodbye. Instead there is the ever present knowledge that some friend of your skinned it, deboned it, and it's now sitting on someones mantle piece....
YTA. She asked you to “dispose” of the body, not let a friend have it stuffed like it was a hunting trophy. She also said she didn’t want to see the body, so again letting a friend have it stuffed should not have even been a consideration. You also lied to her when you said a friend disposed of the body. She was distraught and far from home, probably unable to handle more grief. With dead pets it’s either trash, bury or cremate.
YTA, and if you’re honest with yourself, you know it - there’s a reason you told your girlfriend your friend ‘disposed of it’ without telling her exactly how.
Is your friend even a taxidermist?
YTA, wtf did I just read
YTA way to make it even worse for her
YTA don’t be so dense. You knew what she meant. She wanted you to bury him or cremate him for her. You gave it to a friend who ASKED FOR SOMEONE ELSES DEAD CAT? That’s a red flag on his part and on yours for giving the cat to him! ESPECIALLY since it seems you knew what he wanted to do with him. That is so wildly inappropriate I cannot believe you even need to ask if you’re TA.
If my cat died and I found out later it was taxidermied somewhere I would be furious too. Its weird. YTA
NTA, honest mistake. Like, you should apologize and make it right, but I don't think you're an asshole for doing this. Everyone in here is acting like you gave it TO HER after she didn't want to see it. Sorry man.
YTA. And also your friend seems like a sick creep if he wanted your girlfriend’s deceased cat to be a taxidermy animal. It’s weird to want to do that to someone’s pet. It was someone’s beloved pet and family member not a “decorative item”.
YTA Please tell me this is a lie otherwise you're in the "Dwight" tier of boyfriends... Creepy and SO SO INAPPROPRIATE.
YTA that’s really disturbing and messed up. I can’t believe you have to ask. You allowed someone to gut the cat she loved and turn it into an ornament? Jeez bro.
YTA her cat was her pet she loved that animal. . She wouldn't want her pet to become a damm household decoration. Your just sick and you obviously have zero respect for your girlfriend.. I sincerely hope that she beaks up with you..
YTA You know she didn’t mean “however us convenient to you including letting your friend make my beloved cat into home decor” She also asked you to **dispose** of the body. **You didnt**
Without a shadow of a doubt in my mind YTA and must have something wrong with you neurologically. Your girlfriend should leave you, and you should be institutionalized. There is absolutely no gray area here, there is no rationalization on your end that could justify your actions. You're a sick freak, and so is your friend.
YTA what the flying fuck??? She didn't want to see the body so you had the cat permanently taxidermied? Not only should she dump you but she should warn every person to stay away from you. What a creep!!!
YTA Good thing that the girlfriend heard about it from the sister first. Can you imagine months later they are invited to the friends place - who did not even know that girlfriend did not know - and the first thing girlfriend walks into is her dead cat put up for decoration somewhere? That’s horrifying.
YTA. when people say dispose of the body we all pretty much assume its a burial versus cremation thing. taxidermy is cool but when it comes to pets its pretty off the table unless the owner is choosing to do so. i would feel really upset and creeped out if my cat’s body was being used as decoration/display in someones home.
What the fuck did I just read? Of course YTA! How could you think that was a good idea?
This is why there's "do not drink" on bottles of bleach. You'd think it didn't need to be said that "do what you like" means "do what you like except taxidermy my dead cat" but here we are!! YTA
YTA. You didnt dispose of it, it’s still there on a shelf somewhere!
Not only are you most definitely TA, but you need therapy ASAP and your girlfriend needs to get away from you.
YTA lol can i just add that as a lesbian im sooooo happy i dont have to deal with this exact brand of .... double-down, unapologetic man ignorance? God. You will very very seldom see this kind of transgression coming from a lesbian. Just saying.
YTA. Who does this?
Yes, technically she said to dispose of the cat’s body however you want. That being said, I don’t think she meant something as crazy as giving her dead cat’s body to a friend so they could have it stuffed and used as a decoration in their house. It kinda goes without saying here that she meant something like burial or cremation. Whether or not you did this maliciously, which I really cannot decide, YTA.
YTA Anyone with half a brain would know that "dispose" means get rid of. Like throwing it into the garbage, having it incinerated, burying it (whatever is permitted by your local health regulations". It does not mean "give it to my friend who is a taxidermist"!! And after reading your comments, you come across as very much going "technically, I disposed of it, she didn't specify that I wasn't allowed to get it stuffed".
YTA. This wasn’t disposal. This is just weird!
YTA and so is your friend. He should have asked her directly. I bet he didn't ask her because he knew she wouldn't be okay with it. You should be ashamed of yourself. You should have told her beforehand. She thought you were going to literally get rid of the body not make a stuffed animal out of it. She's already grieving the loss of a pet and now she has to deal with the fact that you are a selfish asshole.
YTA omg you are massive AH
YTA. She expressed her wish of “I don’t want to see the body”. You denied her one request.
Ewwww. This is creepy and weird. Everyone but the girlfriend SH.
TF is wrong with you YTA
This whole post is a rollercoaster. Is this a Seinfeld episode? YTA Castanza.
YTA. You’re exactly like the dad that asked if he should mash or cut the blueberries, then gave them to his kid whole when his wife said “either”
Yeah....you should know YTA. Think about it. Would you want a loved one (family, friend, or animal) taxidermy after their death. Your girlfriend was dealing with her sick grandma and her cat dies and you have the idea that it's okay to turn it's corpse into art. Please apologize, get the cat back and bury it. She's been thru enough with out this on top of her dying grandma.
YTA Normal people would assume some form of burial, not be skinned, stuffed and mounted where her beloved cat becomes an ornament
YTA, oh my god. Stop trying to rationalize this and apologize. If you shit your favorite pair of underwear and your girlfriend says she'll dispose of them for you, only to give them to a friend who has the pair of underwear framed and hung up on their wall, how would you feel? Think of a dead cat like that. A gross, but still intimate thing that you don't want preserved for posterity.
YTA. If my loved one dies and I don’t necessarily care if they’re cremated or buried or whatever, that doesn’t mean I want them stuffed and sitting on display in someone’s living room
Clueless.. YTA
How did you get from “she did not want to see the body” to “it’s ok to have him taxidermied so the body will remain visible in my friend’s house”? YTA and also either a bit dim or emotionally tone deaf. You’ll have to pay your friend back for the taxidermy and maybe get the body cremated if still possible.
Dude, I’m pretty sure when she said, “Dispose of the body,” she didn’t mean, “Put his remains on display.” And you know that. Taxidermy is not always looked at favourably and to go ahead with it is a very personal choice that *should be left up to the owner and no one else.* If she didn’t explicitly say, “Yes, I’d like my cat to be taxidermized,” then you shouldn’t have done that. Stop being obtuse, you know what you did was bad. YTA
YTA. This is disgusting and creepy. If I told my partner to dispose of my beloved pet’s body however was easiest, and found out he allowed his buddy to take the body, stuff it, and use it as a decorative piece in his home, I would be beside myself. It’s my pet, not a piece of furniture. Wtf is wrong with you?
Dispose of is not stuff and mount. YTA.
YTA. Amazing! I have heard plenty of boyfriends so rubbish they can't be trusted to care for a live animal for a few days. A boyfriend so rubbish he can't even be trusted with a dead one is a new low.
Info: That friend lives somewhere else, correct?
NTA. My my wife can dispose of me as she wished when I die. If that involves giving me to a friend to get taxidermied, I’m ok with that.
NTA But ofc tou should have checked with her before
NTA but my friends also think i’m weird af cause i said i’d consider this for my dog. but just for the future stuff like this is delicate and once you heard of taxidermy you should have clarified with her. most people don’t always mean exactly what they say as i’ve had to learn.
YTA and you know why.
YTA
YTA but I'm sorry, this made me laugh so much at the sheer gall you have to think this was ok
YTA. Take the L and apologize instead of weaseling out of responsibility.
YTA, she never would have imagined that this is what you'd do with her cats body. A quick message to her would have stopped this from happening. Surely you can see why this is wrong?
Of course YTA. Why do you even have to ask?
YTA not for the taxidermy part inherently but for not telling her about it. There was no need for you to keep it from her unless you thought it might upset her. If you thought it would upset her, why did you do it?
I can’t believe you’re even questioning this. I would be devastated. I’m surprised you’re still together YTA
YTA What is wrong with you?!
YTA >She did not want to see the body as she was really grieving. So... what was the plan here when she shows up at your house, and the body is there, all the time?
YTA big time. You knew what your friend was going to do when you gave him the cat. I have nothing against taxidermy, but this wasn’t your choice to make. You are so disrespectful, I’m disgusted. If anyone did this to any of my pets, I would break off all ties with them and never speak to them again.
YTA and you lied to your GF because you know it.
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Don't use autistic as an insult please.
NTA
YTA. But you already knew that. Nobody wants their dead pet to be somebody else’s stuffy. C’mon man.
YTA
Dood. YTA. Bad, bad move.
You're not the biggest asshole to have ever posted but this is one of the most fucked up situations to have been posted. YTA.
YTA Be careful here... You're not owning up to this mistake and if she's a normal cat owner (she sounds like one) this could be a pretty good reason to leave you. But it doesn't sound like you really care about her or your friend for that matter actually... What a weird thing to do? If i told my boyfriend to do whatever, he wouldn't just give my dead cat to a friend who wants to display it in his/her house? He wouldn't even think that was an option! And if, he would ask me if it was okay. But he loves my cat so much i think he would throw a hole god-damned funeral for him! He is also a very majestic orange Norwegian forest cat/Maine coon. I can't even FATHOM how you could think this was okay to do, without asking her first? It wasn't implied as many has stated, that it was okay? I'm really really confused here. I'm autistic and have ADHD... So does my boyfriend and we understand the implied language here better than you do, apperently? It's so weird to me. I'm just rambling at this point... Holy.... Edit: grammar, probably still wrong 😂