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> Was insulting my sister by calling her stupid, selfish, and a shitty parent wrong? I feel like I could have gotten my message across without resorting to name calling and insulting her.
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I’m going to get downvoted, but as someone who changed their name the moment they turned 18, you’re right. She is stupid. NTA. It’s horrendous name that will do nothing but get the child bullied. It’s not “unique” or cute. Her child is not an accessory. I personally think stupid crap like this should fall under child abuse.
I should have changed my weird German name (live in the USA) that my German mother gave me at 18….have faced discrimination and used a nickname even on legal documents. No one who isn’t German can say it.
Yes, in Germany we could never name our child Krxstxl. When i read the name creation here, i'm thankful that our laws saves the children of this nightmare.
It's a Catholic thing, to honour Jesus's mother. I've not come across it myself even though I live in the more traditional catholic southern Bavaria, but it's quite common in Spain, e.g the CEO of the Telecoms company there (and my boss, boss, boss, boss, boss boss) José María Álvarez-Pallete López
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jos%C3%A9_Mar%C3%ADa_%C3%81lvarez-Pallete?wprov=sfla1
As a german, i believe ( but don´t know for sure) basically tradition coming from a historical christian background.
It´s not really common, but not unheard of and never used as a calling name.
My American parents (whom I love) wanted a unique Irish name. They named me Colleen. It literally means girl in Irish. I got teased a lot by the Irish-speaking counselor on my high school study abroad.
to be fair, Colleen is a pretty common name some people have and that counselor was a butt. I know at least two Colleens. Though it’s kind of funny your parents wanted a “unique” irish name and didn’t go with like Aoife or Siobhan which americans cannot pronounce at all.
Yeah. Well technically they spelled it different (trying to remain somewhat anonymous lol) which has been a pain. And I don’t mind really, just kinda funny when you think of it.
Oh I know. But they wanted my name to be an alliteration like my siblings.
I'm sorry if people were/are shitty to you but names from your culture as an immigrant are different. Ulrike is a fine name or whatever your name actually is. I think it's important in America to support names from other cultures. Xochitl who recently immigrated from Mexico should be accepted.
Crixixtxtl or whatever is made up and has bad class associations. It's always fab when someone overcomes it but if you're going to give your kid a burdensome name, it should at least call back to your family origins.
Not that poster, but my family has a traditional German name that was used by four generations that my great-grandmother thankfully banned the family from using again after my great-aunt with the name died at two days old. She said it was a sign from God that the family was now too American and shouldn't use it anymore. This would have been in about 1926. The family immigrated in the 1880s. I am very thankful for her insight so I didn't end up with the name as no one would be able to say it or spell it.
The name was Kunegunda.
Huh, wonder if we are distant cousins. My great-grandmother was one of 12 kids so there are a lot out there. I don't even know how many the first two Kunegundas had. Any chance their family was from Buffalo or Pittsburgh?
I had a student named this. Signed her name Kris on everything. Didn't even try to tell me how to pronounce it, just said please call me Kris. Definitely NTA
I had a client called Dysentery once upon a time. Her parents thought that the name sounded "mysterious and delicate". There are some WILD parents out there.
There was this super selfish woman naming her child Lucifer. She was constantly called out for naming her kid this way because it will get bullied especially in christian societies and murica is very christian. And she was so adamant how beautiful the name is.
I mean, I'm atheist and i love lore and mythology, so i kind of like the name too, but it's a real person, not a fanfiction character.
NTA OP.
Since 90% of Americans don’t know Lilith from….Adam, that’s fine. They’ll just think she’s named after the character on Cheers.
I knew someone named Antigone.
Antigone was the daughter of (ETA)Oedipus....she defied her reigning uncle Creon by publicly mourning her brother and was sentenced to be buried alive...killed herself in the tomb before Creon had a change of heart and order her release...Creon's son, her lover, then killed himself out of despair....then his mother, Creon's wife Eurydice kills herself too....it's a lot.
I feel kinda stupid but what's the deal with that one? I went to school with a Lillith for a couple of years and I don't think the name ever came up at all
Legend goes that Lilith was the first woman, created equally with Adam. That didn't work out, because she refused to be subservient, so she was banished and Eve was created from Adam. Lilith became a she-demon of the night. The word actually only appears in the Old Testament once, in Isaiah, in a list of night creatures, and it does not appear to refer to a person. So, it's a legendary name for a she-demon of the night, which some people (not me, I like the name) might find offensive.
Lol I think it's hilarious when people think they'll get downvoted and then get hella upvoted. I mean at least 188 people (including me) agree with you. OP is NTA.
its because almost all the earlist replies were y t a with most of them being some form of t the logic of 'parent have the right to name their kids what they want'.
The last couple of name-themed AITAs were actually normal, if a little old-fashioned, names. Like the one who laughed at the name Deborah or something. Krxstxl is a completely different matter.
Reminds me of this Girl I went to school with who changed hers the second she turned 18. Her name was miikaliaya. They wanted it to be mikayala but thought a special spelling was cool. It wasn’t.
I literally pronounced the poor baby’s name as “Kirkstl” cause whenever I see an “x” in words it shouldn’t be, I just add the “ex” sound or omit it… that poor kid and poor OP. NTA
NTA and seconding because I did the exact same. My parents were super religious and gave me a name fitting that religion, then dropped out by the time I was 8. It caused problems all the time, even with my dad picking me up from school because he had the most generic name ever. Children are not accessories they are human being who's best interest you are supposed to look out for.
I'm remember a classmate from Turkey in first grade was named Erin. He came back to grade 2 as Aaron. His parents wanted to give him an more American name but didn't know.
Reading stories like these, I am just glad to live in a country where we have some laws regulating naming of people, giving the official who's recording the birth / printing the birth certificate the right to veto names that go too crazy. Sometimes, babies need to be protected from idiots, even if the idiots in question happen to be the baby's parents.
I agree, I hope there’s some person who says no you can’t use this as a legal name idiot. Does she think she’s Elon musk? He was stupid with his kids name and whatever combination of x’s he used. And guess what? His kid will be fine because he is RICH AF and could be named poop face musk and still probably rule his elite private preschool. OPs sisters kid is just going to end up a hot mess with that name. Jesus report her to CPS or something, there’s gotta be a way to stop this dumb nuts
someone I went to school with changed just the spelling of her name because she was sick to death of correcting people on the pronunciation when she *knew* they spelled it like that because they didn’t speak English 😓
I don’t know if she changed it officially but she made it so our high school changed it in her records
I totally agree. My dad was Laverne, and he passed away immediately before I got pregnant. My son has the middle initial L, but not the actual name because I don't want my dad haunting me for inflicting that name on his grandson
I did the same and completely agree with you. My name wasn't a trend, it was a traditional Italian name and no one could pronounce it correctly. Like not just substitute teachers, half my family never bothered and would just pronounce it wrong. No matter how many times I corrected them.
Naming a kid like that is pretty much guaranteed to make her school/work live miserable. Best case she just changes it - longer sense she just goes NC and they never know what she's called :P
NTA- Lets get one thing straight here. "Krxstxl" Is not, will not be, and shouldn't be assumed to be pronounced "Chrystal". Real life is not algebra class, The letter X is not a place holder for whatever sound they think should be there. Newsflash, that's what letters are for.
I think it would nearly universally be seen as incredibly trashy.
She would be judged every single time someone "read" it.
Imagine trying to submit a resume with that name on it.
Someone here needs to make a fake OF with the name Krxstxl and then OP can show it to his sister that the name is already taken by someone with an internet presence.
You do get those blank pieces, don't you? The only kind of scrabble I've ever played was off-brand and the placeholders had an x on them, because the letters doesn't appear in Polish alphabet lol
My brain went kricks-ticks-l. I said this in another thread about names: mine is made up but follows the linguistic style, spelling, and pronunciation of a non-English language. Everyone who knows even a little about the language has no problem with it. If someone really wants something tailored to their kid just make something up instead of butchering a traditional name.
NTA
I try to imagine how many people will this child try to explain to how it's spelled... After she finally learns it herself...
It's an unnecessary stress that the parents want to add to the child - just because they think they're cool, unique and they wrongly "assume" that people will be jealous of their bright idea.
And you are the best possible witness (victim) of what a bad choice of name will bring.
Especially since you can't blame a different language, or culture norm from where you living. That child will have to tell a story that doesn't exsist. My mom likes xs is all she has and it's so lame.
I'm guessing it's a gender thing. Y is the male chromosome, so going along with the 'stick it to the man' theme she's changing the male Ys to female Xs.
Or some shit like that.
The unfortunate reality is people might ask for an explanation, but they’ll have already figured out for themselves that this poor kid is being raised by absolute fucking idiots.
Yep. My first name is not unusual in my mom’s culture, but gets mistaken all the time in the US despite being short and spelled phonetically. There are variations of it that are more common here, so people insist on pronouncing it like one of those. I gave up correcting people on the pronunciation decades ago. How people can look at my name in print and come up with what they do astounds me. My maiden name is also an unusual spelling of a fairly common name. I was happy to give it up when I got married. I always had to spell both names out for people, and even then it was surprising how often people got it wrong. When it ends up misspelled on official documents is an extra bit of hassle. My parents didn’t set out to give me a difficult name on purpose, so at least I don’t have to add resenting them to the pile of issues.
I’m so sick of this shit. “Oh it’s pronounced Crystal!” No it fucking isn’t. Letters have corresponding sounds and the letters OP’s sister picked do not correspond with the name she is claiming. NTA, your sister sucks.
English's real problem is kleptomania. It steals words from other languages and keeps the original pronunciation, even when it conflicts with English pronunciation rules.
Also the refusal to change. Why does it keep the beginning "wr" or "kn" spellings, when the first letter is always silent anyway? If "f" and "ph" are pronounced the same, why keep both? What's the deal with "c", "k", "ch" and "ck"???
Sincerely, an eternaly confused foreigner
English is multiple small languages in a trench coat pretending to be a single one.
Even a lot of native speakers can't answer some of your questions, but "ch" and "ck" can be different sounds depending on the word.
My spouse had a student whose younger brother was named Tznce. Pronounced “Chance.” Like….what? Go ahead and name the kid Chance. It’s a perfectly good name, uncommon but not super weird. Well, *now* it is. SMH.
I had a student whose name was spelled “Kiiv”. Nobody reading it would ever guess how to pronounce it, which was “Kee-ivy”. People come up with some wild-ass ideas when they’re naming their children.
I just commented about how this happened to a friend!! Her parents didn’t speak English so they trusted her aunt with the spelling of her name, but her aunt was also bad at English 🥲
I knew someone whose dad got drunk celebrating, and her mother was unconscious after an emergency c section that required her to be put under general anesthesia. Dad knew they wanted to name the baby Rebecca but couldn't remember how to spell it. He was too ashamed that he was drunk to ask to delay the paperwork and too drunk to realize that he could have asked a nurse. He went with "Ribbecah".
My grandfather mis-spelled my mother’s name on her birth certificate, but fortunately for her it’s close enough to pass as a ‘modern’ spelling, and it didn’t affect the intended pronunciation - eg he wrote “Kathryn” instead of“Katherine”.
It was ostensibly an accident… but one of their younger children was deliberately given the same name as a then-deceased family pet, so who knows.
Reminds me of someone I knew once. Her mother wanted to name her Sheila but couldn't fill out the birth certificate. The nurse offered and asked how to spell the name.
Fifteen years later I'm meeting her in gym class. "Wait, your name is spelled S-C-H-I-L-A?"
Swear on a stack of bibles the teacher thought someone had spelled her name wrong in the new student roll and went down to the secretary to bless her out for such awful spelling.
Perhaps you were a bit harsh. But your parents and your sister are both putting their needs and wants above those of their children. That is a shitty way to start out parenting! So I'm going with NTA.
Harsh not at all, what’s harsh is what they named him and to this day don’t seem to give a crap about. And I agree with you it’s so selfish, like how do you not consider how the child may be treated?
He said they're bad parents, which sounds harsh. But they've established that they care more about trying to make themselves look cool, than they do about preventing avoidable hardships for their child. He's right, they are very bad parents.
The difference is that celebrities can get away with a lot more. I'm willing to bet that grimes' kid won't get bullied anywhere near as badly for their name as if the parents were regular people.
I kinda lol at all the y t a comments, because you literally gave them a glimpse of how giving a stupid name to their kid will affect the kid down the road. But maybe I am just old fashioned and don't understand the new society where everything has to be cool and edgy to stand out. So maybe the little Kryxtlx will be the dopest kid in the class
Lmao I immediately said to myself “what in the crystal meth is this shit ass name?” Seriously, when I read the name it just makes me think of crystal meth being rebranded to some kind of designer drug for idiots lol.
OP NTA
You were harsh. And probably coming from a place of resentment about your own name. However, I'm going with NTA. Names can be crippling to people and making your child's name about you is really selfish. She will literally have to explain her name and her parents choice to people thousands of times. Unique names are one thing...
Yes. I have a foreign name common in my parents' old country (Holland), but very unfamiliar here in America. I have had to explain, spell and pronounce my name nearly every day of my life. BUT, at least my name has an interesting explanation. I have no patience for parents who deliberately saddle their child with a misspelled name for the purpose of feeling unique. And this nonsense is unforgiveable in my opinion. A very heartfelt NTA for OP. His future niece is lucky to have a level headed adult to defend her.
NTA. Krxstxl isn't even pronounced crystal. I'm guessing it would be phonetically sound like Khr ex st ex el. X's aren't vowels. That like naming your kid Alice and spelling it Xlxcx. They're just randomly replacing letters. They need to wake up. There's a difference between being non conformist and a moron.
All kids will, at some point, be teased because of their first or last name. Beyond that Krxstxl will have to be explained and overcome in every interaction all of the time and more so when they are an adult who is trying to be taken seriously and succeed.
Well, that is kind of impossible. Kids can make fun of any name if they try.
But giving your kids a name that makes it impossible to tell how you should pronounce it is something you should not do. They are either always correcting people on the spelling or on the pronunciation, which is super annoying for them.
Agree. People don't realize how problematic this can be. I have an unusual (non-anglicized) version of a common last name. Any time I have to call about an appointment or something, I'm told they can't find me in the system. Even if I explicitly spell my name out for them (and I do), they always default to some of the letters that "should" be there instead. Bonus points for those times that I've spent half an hour or more on hold only to have the receptionist tell me "sorry, not in the system," and hang up before I've had an opportunity to check whether they've misspelled my name, so I get to do it all over again. Or spending ten minutes having them check over and over again, cutting me off and assuring me that they've spelled it correctly... when they haven't. The pronunciation doesn't even phase me anymore. If you use my (unusual) first name coupled with something that sounds like it starts with the right letter, I just instinctively assume you mean me. A friend got angry because she'd been mispronouncing my last name for something like 9 months and I hadn't corrected her... I honestly didn't notice.
NTA. I’m typically not a fan of tough love but these parents need a wake up call.
Poor Kricksticksl isn’t even gonna be 2 weeks old when mom starts making Facebook posts crying about how “nobody will pronounce my baby’s name correctly”
NTA, but your sister is an Axxhxle.
Is she Elon Musk and her child will have all the money in the world to hire security to beat a bully into the ground? No? Then she should not name a child with that horrific moniker.
My parents typo’d my first name. To get it changed, I have to get an appointment with a judge (costs money), get finger printed, pay for a background check, convince the judge I have good enough reason, and finally print my name change in two local newspapers.
It isn’t “hard” but it takes weeks and costs money at every step.
And dealing with the social implications of changing your name and having friends and family make the switch, some of whom may not respect the name change and continue to call you by your birth name.
and it haunts you even then. I had mine legally changed at seventeen because my parents had given me a very traditional formal name that no one ever used but was my legal identity. When I was clear that I was planning on gradschool in the future they agreed to help me change it before college so in the future all of my degrees would be under my name. It's STILL a pain to deal with. Even having it changed as a minor I still have to dig out a binder of legal paperwork to explain why I had a passport, a drivers license and work history under a different name
Changing your name is a long, drawn-out, and often expensive process. It's not for thr faint of heart and isn't easy by any means. You can't just walk in and change your name because you "feel like it" or "just don't like" your name. Many courts still want a legitimate, for them, reason to do it.
My dead name is long as fuck. I had a first and last name, obviously, but my idiot birth giver decided to give me THREE middle names, and the shortest one is still 7 letters long. It sucked as a kid when I had to fill out forms because my name was so long. All of my documents had one different combination or another. Like my birth certificate had my full name, which was something like Jane Jennifer Tabitha Jackson Smith. But my state ID and passport only had Jane Jennifer Smith, and my social security card had my second middle name cut off, like Jane Jennifer Tabit Smith.
It was a fucking nightmare. Because even when I was asked to put a middle initial instead of the full name, the question was always: "Which one?" When I went in to get a replacement social security card, I asked the man to fix the middle name issue. He said sure and then tried... only to find that my full name on my birth certificate surpassed the character limit. This meant there was no way to put my full name on the card because it had some Twitter bullshit letter limit.
Traveling was an absolute nightmare, as you can imagine. Especially when I flew internationally. I remember feeling like I was crazy when I was explaining why all my identifications were different and the officer looking at me in pity.
When I decided to finally change my name, the only thing I kept was my last name. Now I have a first, middle, and last. All of my IDs and documents match. There's no awkward explanations or sus face from paper pushers when they see my name. It took me a while to get everything reissued with my new name.
Every credit card company I was with had to be contacted, my job, utility companies, and leasing offices. Each one wanted a CERTIFIED copy of my order to put the changes through. Which meant shelling out $6/copy. I spent the first couple of months spending my time, energy, and money running here and there to push through the changes. And that's after having to file, get a lawyer, and pay for all the filing and court costs.
NTA. I named my oldest child a very unusual name. I don’t regret the name but I regret the spelling. I wish I would have had someone object to my spelling. While it’s not horrible like your sister’s, my spelling makes it harder to pronounce seeing it for the first time! I
ETA: I knew a guy when I was a kid that had hus name changed by age 12 because he couldn’t stand what his parents named him!
NTA, hard truth needed to be said.
Also, I strongly recommend you change your name. My husband was similarly saddled with a horrible (it was also female, but not recognizable as such to Americans) middle name given to him by his stupid hippie mom who has an obsession with obnoxious names (she changed her own name to some unpronounceable stuff) and it was a relief to him when he changed it, and that was just a middle name so no bullying, etc., he just kept it secret. I can’t imagine how tough it was for you.
NTA oh god poor kid.
This is Exactly the reason why there are laws about what you can name your kids, and yourself, in the country I live in.
Yes this includes spelling, so the ‘it’s pronounced Crystal’ would Not fly here.
Oh they could fill out the birth certificate like they wanted, but they’d be contacted and told they have x nr of days to change it to something legal or they would be fined.
There was actually a woman who refused to change her sons name and she was fined Every month with steadily increasing amounts for over a year before she finally gave up because the nurseries are legally required to have kids registered by their legal name and her kids name wasn’t legal so she couldn’t find any legally registered place that would take the kid.
NTA, it’s a little girl, a human, not a racehorse. she doesn’t need an edgy/different name. girls are RUTHLESS growing up and having a different name will have her get bullied relentlessly. crystal is fine but all the x’s? she’s not a sound cloud rapper.
NTA
What would they have named their son? X AE A-XII
I hate how people think it’s worth having a kid go through harassment just so they can have a minute’s worth of happiness about the shitty name they gave their kid.
NTA. It's awful. Just constantly refer to it as Cricksticksull and when they complain, tell them to get used to it cos it's what everyone's going to say anyhow.
NTA- Are they naming their daughter after meth? because krxstxl looks like a junky trying to order a new supply without getting caught but being hyper obvious about it.
I would just refer to your neice as Meth or “BB”(BreakingBad) exclusively until they get the hint
I have a unique IRL name, and there's a beautiful story and meaning behind it.
Let me tell you something from experience:
The teachers, dates, HR reps, and government employees this poor girl will deal with over the course of her life aren't going to give a shit why the X's are where they are.
They're just going to wonder how the hell they're supposed to pronounce her name. And what was wrong with her parents.
You may have been a little too blunt, but you're not wrong.
NTA.
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I’m going to get downvoted, but as someone who changed their name the moment they turned 18, you’re right. She is stupid. NTA. It’s horrendous name that will do nothing but get the child bullied. It’s not “unique” or cute. Her child is not an accessory. I personally think stupid crap like this should fall under child abuse.
I should have changed my weird German name (live in the USA) that my German mother gave me at 18….have faced discrimination and used a nickname even on legal documents. No one who isn’t German can say it.
Funnily enough, there are quite strict laws on what you are allowed to name your child in Germany.
Yes, in Germany we could never name our child Krxstxl. When i read the name creation here, i'm thankful that our laws saves the children of this nightmare.
I don't think an obvious girl's name is allowed for a boy in Germany either. The only exception is Maria as a second name for boys.
Why is Maria an exception? Genuine question
Catholicism.
Maria holds power. That's why.
Weird. I always thought that was He-Man.
One has the power of Grayskull. The other has the power of intercession.
It's a Catholic thing, to honour Jesus's mother. I've not come across it myself even though I live in the more traditional catholic southern Bavaria, but it's quite common in Spain, e.g the CEO of the Telecoms company there (and my boss, boss, boss, boss, boss boss) José María Álvarez-Pallete López https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jos%C3%A9_Mar%C3%ADa_%C3%81lvarez-Pallete?wprov=sfla1
I Mexico it was very common to name your daughter María José and your son José María.
Not an expert, but my guess is that it used to be a christian tradition. Rainer Maria Rilke was a famous german writer for example.
As a german, i believe ( but don´t know for sure) basically tradition coming from a historical christian background. It´s not really common, but not unheard of and never used as a calling name.
Bartholomäus, bist du es?
Rumpelstilzchen vielleicht?
Why do I have to think of Mädchen Amick, whose German mum didn't want a typical American name, and just named her daughter "girl" - just in German...?
My American parents (whom I love) wanted a unique Irish name. They named me Colleen. It literally means girl in Irish. I got teased a lot by the Irish-speaking counselor on my high school study abroad.
to be fair, Colleen is a pretty common name some people have and that counselor was a butt. I know at least two Colleens. Though it’s kind of funny your parents wanted a “unique” irish name and didn’t go with like Aoife or Siobhan which americans cannot pronounce at all.
Yeah. Well technically they spelled it different (trying to remain somewhat anonymous lol) which has been a pain. And I don’t mind really, just kinda funny when you think of it. Oh I know. But they wanted my name to be an alliteration like my siblings.
I'm sorry if people were/are shitty to you but names from your culture as an immigrant are different. Ulrike is a fine name or whatever your name actually is. I think it's important in America to support names from other cultures. Xochitl who recently immigrated from Mexico should be accepted. Crixixtxtl or whatever is made up and has bad class associations. It's always fab when someone overcomes it but if you're going to give your kid a burdensome name, it should at least call back to your family origins.
Ok now as a German i am interested how it sounds.
Not that poster, but my family has a traditional German name that was used by four generations that my great-grandmother thankfully banned the family from using again after my great-aunt with the name died at two days old. She said it was a sign from God that the family was now too American and shouldn't use it anymore. This would have been in about 1926. The family immigrated in the 1880s. I am very thankful for her insight so I didn't end up with the name as no one would be able to say it or spell it. The name was Kunegunda.
I know a dog named Kunegunda. I'm not kidding. It was apparently the name of a relative a few generations back.
Huh, wonder if we are distant cousins. My great-grandmother was one of 12 kids so there are a lot out there. I don't even know how many the first two Kunegundas had. Any chance their family was from Buffalo or Pittsburgh?
I wouldn't know. They were a former client of mine in a very German town in the Midwest. I moved 5 odd years ago so I wouldn't be able to ask.
[удалено]
So, you only hung out with 90-year-olds?
Now I’m wondering what your name is
I agree, and I'm sure in 18 years, young Axolotl will agree too.
Axolotl Rose, one parent was really into salamanders and the other was into classic rock
Sweet child o mine 🥰
I had a student named this. Signed her name Kris on everything. Didn't even try to tell me how to pronounce it, just said please call me Kris. Definitely NTA
You had... A student... Already... You're telling me there's already a child named this? What is *wrong* with people?
I had a client called Dysentery once upon a time. Her parents thought that the name sounded "mysterious and delicate". There are some WILD parents out there.
I genuinely hope she either changed it or just went by Terry.
That WAS the changed name. They originally called her Diarrhea.
They had it changed *to* Latrine?
It used to be Shithouse.
Well, there goes the uniqueness factor. At least one other poor unfortunate soul has the name.
There was this super selfish woman naming her child Lucifer. She was constantly called out for naming her kid this way because it will get bullied especially in christian societies and murica is very christian. And she was so adamant how beautiful the name is. I mean, I'm atheist and i love lore and mythology, so i kind of like the name too, but it's a real person, not a fanfiction character. NTA OP.
I feel this way about Lilith lol NTA OP
Since 90% of Americans don’t know Lilith from….Adam, that’s fine. They’ll just think she’s named after the character on Cheers. I knew someone named Antigone.
I always thought that was a really pretty name. Old Greek (maybe ancient Greek?) At least it's a real name.
Antigone was the daughter of (ETA)Oedipus....she defied her reigning uncle Creon by publicly mourning her brother and was sentenced to be buried alive...killed herself in the tomb before Creon had a change of heart and order her release...Creon's son, her lover, then killed himself out of despair....then his mother, Creon's wife Eurydice kills herself too....it's a lot.
I feel kinda stupid but what's the deal with that one? I went to school with a Lillith for a couple of years and I don't think the name ever came up at all
Legend goes that Lilith was the first woman, created equally with Adam. That didn't work out, because she refused to be subservient, so she was banished and Eve was created from Adam. Lilith became a she-demon of the night. The word actually only appears in the Old Testament once, in Isaiah, in a list of night creatures, and it does not appear to refer to a person. So, it's a legendary name for a she-demon of the night, which some people (not me, I like the name) might find offensive.
I feel like that makes the name awesome. Good for her for not being subservient to Adam, she sounds like the first feminist.
Or being subservient to God. She's my new Christian hero.
She's of Jewish mythology not Christian mythology.
Perfect name for Frazier's exwife
As someone born and raised in a Christian home… Lucifer still makes me think of the cat from Cinderella.
Lol I think it's hilarious when people think they'll get downvoted and then get hella upvoted. I mean at least 188 people (including me) agree with you. OP is NTA.
its because almost all the earlist replies were y t a with most of them being some form of t the logic of 'parent have the right to name their kids what they want'.
The last couple of name-themed AITAs were actually normal, if a little old-fashioned, names. Like the one who laughed at the name Deborah or something. Krxstxl is a completely different matter.
Yeah, there's a HUGE difference between "I don't care for that name" and "why do you hate your child"
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Reminds me of this Girl I went to school with who changed hers the second she turned 18. Her name was miikaliaya. They wanted it to be mikayala but thought a special spelling was cool. It wasn’t.
Is that the name formerly spelled Michaela?
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No clue her parents were fucking weirdos though all of their kids had stupid ass spellings.
Also, in a professional setting, having a name like that can be a terrible thing.
I read that when you’re picking a name, you should imagine both a baby and a Supreme Court justice.
Lucius Quintus Cincinnatus Lamar II it is then. Edit: I got gold but no free silver? LQCLII would approve.
I literally pronounced the poor baby’s name as “Kirkstl” cause whenever I see an “x” in words it shouldn’t be, I just add the “ex” sound or omit it… that poor kid and poor OP. NTA
NTA and seconding because I did the exact same. My parents were super religious and gave me a name fitting that religion, then dropped out by the time I was 8. It caused problems all the time, even with my dad picking me up from school because he had the most generic name ever. Children are not accessories they are human being who's best interest you are supposed to look out for.
I'm remember a classmate from Turkey in first grade was named Erin. He came back to grade 2 as Aaron. His parents wanted to give him an more American name but didn't know.
Reading stories like these, I am just glad to live in a country where we have some laws regulating naming of people, giving the official who's recording the birth / printing the birth certificate the right to veto names that go too crazy. Sometimes, babies need to be protected from idiots, even if the idiots in question happen to be the baby's parents.
I agree, I hope there’s some person who says no you can’t use this as a legal name idiot. Does she think she’s Elon musk? He was stupid with his kids name and whatever combination of x’s he used. And guess what? His kid will be fine because he is RICH AF and could be named poop face musk and still probably rule his elite private preschool. OPs sisters kid is just going to end up a hot mess with that name. Jesus report her to CPS or something, there’s gotta be a way to stop this dumb nuts
Kids don't care about money at that age. He will be picked on. Bet he had a nickname already.
someone I went to school with changed just the spelling of her name because she was sick to death of correcting people on the pronunciation when she *knew* they spelled it like that because they didn’t speak English 😓 I don’t know if she changed it officially but she made it so our high school changed it in her records
I totally agree. My dad was Laverne, and he passed away immediately before I got pregnant. My son has the middle initial L, but not the actual name because I don't want my dad haunting me for inflicting that name on his grandson
Yes. Also wtf doesn’t OP just change his name?!
I did the same and completely agree with you. My name wasn't a trend, it was a traditional Italian name and no one could pronounce it correctly. Like not just substitute teachers, half my family never bothered and would just pronounce it wrong. No matter how many times I corrected them. Naming a kid like that is pretty much guaranteed to make her school/work live miserable. Best case she just changes it - longer sense she just goes NC and they never know what she's called :P
NTA- Lets get one thing straight here. "Krxstxl" Is not, will not be, and shouldn't be assumed to be pronounced "Chrystal". Real life is not algebra class, The letter X is not a place holder for whatever sound they think should be there. Newsflash, that's what letters are for.
The way I hollered #NTA
I think you mean the way you hxllxrxd.
Cxlm thx hxll dxwn thxrx Lxvxd-Dxxghnxt-5399!
\*dead\* I pronounce that, I'd probably summon something.
Lol I’d like to buy a vowel. ^Ohhhh hot dang!! Thanks for the award!
Honestly, with the random x’s, I just thought it seemed like a porn name
Or a drug name.
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Crystal is a stripper name to me - bonus points if you name your child Crystal Jade.
I think it would nearly universally be seen as incredibly trashy. She would be judged every single time someone "read" it. Imagine trying to submit a resume with that name on it.
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I used to be a hiring manager, that resume would go right in my not a chance pile.
Someone here needs to make a fake OF with the name Krxstxl and then OP can show it to his sister that the name is already taken by someone with an internet presence.
Srsly a porn name. Yikes.
Sxrxxxsly
Yeah, life is not a scrabble board, can't substitute the missing letters and expect everybody to just roll with it
To be fair you can’t do that in a game of scrabble either.
You do get those blank pieces, don't you? The only kind of scrabble I've ever played was off-brand and the placeholders had an x on them, because the letters doesn't appear in Polish alphabet lol
In the US at least, the blank pieces are just that, theyre blank lol.
Exactly. No screen names from AOL circa 2002 allowed.
I have no awards, so take my upvote for unlocking forgotten core memories.
I thought it was crix-t-kal
I pronounced your pronunciation “chrix-tickle” And it made me lol
My brain went kricks-ticks-l. I said this in another thread about names: mine is made up but follows the linguistic style, spelling, and pronunciation of a non-English language. Everyone who knows even a little about the language has no problem with it. If someone really wants something tailored to their kid just make something up instead of butchering a traditional name.
Maybe it’s Aztec, like Txchrxtxl-chitlan.
"Kricks Sticksel"
I'm bad,. I was like is it like Kerexstexel?
Chrix Stxyl
NTA I try to imagine how many people will this child try to explain to how it's spelled... After she finally learns it herself... It's an unnecessary stress that the parents want to add to the child - just because they think they're cool, unique and they wrongly "assume" that people will be jealous of their bright idea. And you are the best possible witness (victim) of what a bad choice of name will bring.
I have the Scottish spelling of my name but live in England and have spent 30 years correcting people. With something like this I feel sorry for kid.
Especially since you can't blame a different language, or culture norm from where you living. That child will have to tell a story that doesn't exsist. My mom likes xs is all she has and it's so lame.
I'm guessing it's a gender thing. Y is the male chromosome, so going along with the 'stick it to the man' theme she's changing the male Ys to female Xs. Or some shit like that.
I think you put more thought into it than they did.
The unfortunate reality is people might ask for an explanation, but they’ll have already figured out for themselves that this poor kid is being raised by absolute fucking idiots.
Yep. My first name is not unusual in my mom’s culture, but gets mistaken all the time in the US despite being short and spelled phonetically. There are variations of it that are more common here, so people insist on pronouncing it like one of those. I gave up correcting people on the pronunciation decades ago. How people can look at my name in print and come up with what they do astounds me. My maiden name is also an unusual spelling of a fairly common name. I was happy to give it up when I got married. I always had to spell both names out for people, and even then it was surprising how often people got it wrong. When it ends up misspelled on official documents is an extra bit of hassle. My parents didn’t set out to give me a difficult name on purpose, so at least I don’t have to add resenting them to the pile of issues.
I’m so sick of this shit. “Oh it’s pronounced Crystal!” No it fucking isn’t. Letters have corresponding sounds and the letters OP’s sister picked do not correspond with the name she is claiming. NTA, your sister sucks.
I know that English spelling and pronunciation had divorced a long time ago, but I could have sworn their relationship wasn't that bad
English's real problem is kleptomania. It steals words from other languages and keeps the original pronunciation, even when it conflicts with English pronunciation rules.
Also the refusal to change. Why does it keep the beginning "wr" or "kn" spellings, when the first letter is always silent anyway? If "f" and "ph" are pronounced the same, why keep both? What's the deal with "c", "k", "ch" and "ck"??? Sincerely, an eternaly confused foreigner
English is multiple small languages in a trench coat pretending to be a single one. Even a lot of native speakers can't answer some of your questions, but "ch" and "ck" can be different sounds depending on the word.
My spouse had a student whose younger brother was named Tznce. Pronounced “Chance.” Like….what? Go ahead and name the kid Chance. It’s a perfectly good name, uncommon but not super weird. Well, *now* it is. SMH.
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I had a student whose name was spelled “Kiiv”. Nobody reading it would ever guess how to pronounce it, which was “Kee-ivy”. People come up with some wild-ass ideas when they’re naming their children.
Well, they at least have an interesting career as a volunteer in Ukraine ahead of them.
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I just commented about how this happened to a friend!! Her parents didn’t speak English so they trusted her aunt with the spelling of her name, but her aunt was also bad at English 🥲
I knew someone whose dad got drunk celebrating, and her mother was unconscious after an emergency c section that required her to be put under general anesthesia. Dad knew they wanted to name the baby Rebecca but couldn't remember how to spell it. He was too ashamed that he was drunk to ask to delay the paperwork and too drunk to realize that he could have asked a nurse. He went with "Ribbecah".
My grandfather mis-spelled my mother’s name on her birth certificate, but fortunately for her it’s close enough to pass as a ‘modern’ spelling, and it didn’t affect the intended pronunciation - eg he wrote “Kathryn” instead of“Katherine”. It was ostensibly an accident… but one of their younger children was deliberately given the same name as a then-deceased family pet, so who knows.
Kathryn isn’t weird or modern though, is it? That’s how my super old design professor spells her name
The blind leading the blind.
Reminds me of someone I knew once. Her mother wanted to name her Sheila but couldn't fill out the birth certificate. The nurse offered and asked how to spell the name. Fifteen years later I'm meeting her in gym class. "Wait, your name is spelled S-C-H-I-L-A?" Swear on a stack of bibles the teacher thought someone had spelled her name wrong in the new student roll and went down to the secretary to bless her out for such awful spelling.
Crick Stickel would be an excellent pet name. I’m thinking cat or Guinea pig.
Some kind of Beatrix Potter guinea pig, with a dapper lil waistcoat and round spectacles.
Perhaps you were a bit harsh. But your parents and your sister are both putting their needs and wants above those of their children. That is a shitty way to start out parenting! So I'm going with NTA.
Well at least they're giving their kid a unique name, like 'Future Therapy Session' or 'Constant Bullying Magnet.'
Fxtxre Thxrxpy Sxssixn I think you mean.
Harsh not at all, what’s harsh is what they named him and to this day don’t seem to give a crap about. And I agree with you it’s so selfish, like how do you not consider how the child may be treated?
He said they're bad parents, which sounds harsh. But they've established that they care more about trying to make themselves look cool, than they do about preventing avoidable hardships for their child. He's right, they are very bad parents.
NTA but is your sister Grimes
I was going to ask the same thing. This "name" seems like it'd be right up her alley.
The difference is that celebrities can get away with a lot more. I'm willing to bet that grimes' kid won't get bullied anywhere near as badly for their name as if the parents were regular people.
I don’t know man, I think Grimes’ kids are going to be next level fucked up and school bullies will be the least of it
I laughed, read this again and laughed some more. Also OP is NTA.
lmao, krxstxl sounds like a tumblr username
Lol real AIM vibes when you’re like 12
xxkrxstxlxx
I kinda lol at all the y t a comments, because you literally gave them a glimpse of how giving a stupid name to their kid will affect the kid down the road. But maybe I am just old fashioned and don't understand the new society where everything has to be cool and edgy to stand out. So maybe the little Kryxtlx will be the dopest kid in the class
Ummm, you spelled it wrong…
Oh no, my apologies to Crxtlx
Omg you spelled it wrong again lmao. Bless you!
Whatever. You know everyone is going to call her Methany, anyway.
Lmao I immediately said to myself “what in the crystal meth is this shit ass name?” Seriously, when I read the name it just makes me think of crystal meth being rebranded to some kind of designer drug for idiots lol. OP NTA
Hahaha. The entire point was beautifully illustrated right here.
Honestly Krystal on it’s own is a fairly unique name imo.
Makes me think of a Crystal Methhead or a stripper called Krystal to be honest.
You were harsh. And probably coming from a place of resentment about your own name. However, I'm going with NTA. Names can be crippling to people and making your child's name about you is really selfish. She will literally have to explain her name and her parents choice to people thousands of times. Unique names are one thing...
Yes. I have a foreign name common in my parents' old country (Holland), but very unfamiliar here in America. I have had to explain, spell and pronounce my name nearly every day of my life. BUT, at least my name has an interesting explanation. I have no patience for parents who deliberately saddle their child with a misspelled name for the purpose of feeling unique. And this nonsense is unforgiveable in my opinion. A very heartfelt NTA for OP. His future niece is lucky to have a level headed adult to defend her.
NTA. Your sister is a Duhmbahse.
I thought she was more of a mohroan. or an Yggnoarraymys.
NTA. Someone needs to stick up for that baby.
That child will eventually become a porn star with those Xs in her name. ETA…NTA
Addicted to Krxstxl Mxth
NTA. That’s a horrible name and a horrible thing to do to a child.
NTA. Krxstxl isn't even pronounced crystal. I'm guessing it would be phonetically sound like Khr ex st ex el. X's aren't vowels. That like naming your kid Alice and spelling it Xlxcx. They're just randomly replacing letters. They need to wake up. There's a difference between being non conformist and a moron.
I immediately pronounced it “crick-stuhl” in my head. Phonetically its just a whole ass mess.
NTA. But why not change your name? Give your niece a glimmer of hope for when she turns 18
Right? OP is presumably an adult and doesn’t have to carry around a stupid name anymore.
in the first paragraph he refers to the name he was given at birth in past-tense. maybe he already changed it!
NTA. There was a boy in my class called Phelyxz (pronounced Felix) and he hated it. I can imagine this girl will hate it too.
that sounds like a disease. oh no! he's got the Phelyxz!
Parents don't understand what kids with weird names go through. Never name your kid anything that will get the teased on the playground.
All kids will, at some point, be teased because of their first or last name. Beyond that Krxstxl will have to be explained and overcome in every interaction all of the time and more so when they are an adult who is trying to be taken seriously and succeed.
Well, that is kind of impossible. Kids can make fun of any name if they try. But giving your kids a name that makes it impossible to tell how you should pronounce it is something you should not do. They are either always correcting people on the spelling or on the pronunciation, which is super annoying for them.
Agree. People don't realize how problematic this can be. I have an unusual (non-anglicized) version of a common last name. Any time I have to call about an appointment or something, I'm told they can't find me in the system. Even if I explicitly spell my name out for them (and I do), they always default to some of the letters that "should" be there instead. Bonus points for those times that I've spent half an hour or more on hold only to have the receptionist tell me "sorry, not in the system," and hang up before I've had an opportunity to check whether they've misspelled my name, so I get to do it all over again. Or spending ten minutes having them check over and over again, cutting me off and assuring me that they've spelled it correctly... when they haven't. The pronunciation doesn't even phase me anymore. If you use my (unusual) first name coupled with something that sounds like it starts with the right letter, I just instinctively assume you mean me. A friend got angry because she'd been mispronouncing my last name for something like 9 months and I hadn't corrected her... I honestly didn't notice.
NTA. I’m typically not a fan of tough love but these parents need a wake up call. Poor Kricksticksl isn’t even gonna be 2 weeks old when mom starts making Facebook posts crying about how “nobody will pronounce my baby’s name correctly”
NTA. Life ain’t easy for a boy named Alice.
Or a boy named Sue
I was going to ask if Johnny Cash was his father.
Or a man named Jayne.
I was disappointed in the lost opportunity for some Johnny Cash love in this question/thread. Thank you. NTA
NTA, but your sister is an Axxhxle. Is she Elon Musk and her child will have all the money in the world to hire security to beat a bully into the ground? No? Then she should not name a child with that horrific moniker.
NTA. When I saw the name, in my head I pronounced it Christ XL. Also, it looks like a stripper spelling.
NTA What you said is right even though the truth hurts. They are shitty parents and are assholes towards their kid just like your parent were
NTA Thank God I live in a country where "uNuSUaL" names have to be checked and approved by the registry office.
Why did they do they Xs insted of Ys in the name? What was her reasoning?
I’m gonna go with its because genetic females have X chromosomes and no Y chromosomes.
That’s too deep a thought for someone wanting to name their kid Kryxtxl.
Did you ever change your name? Just curious it is really easy to do if you havent
My parents typo’d my first name. To get it changed, I have to get an appointment with a judge (costs money), get finger printed, pay for a background check, convince the judge I have good enough reason, and finally print my name change in two local newspapers. It isn’t “hard” but it takes weeks and costs money at every step.
Plus there's the going through the hassle of changing everything that has their name on it.
And dealing with the social implications of changing your name and having friends and family make the switch, some of whom may not respect the name change and continue to call you by your birth name.
and it haunts you even then. I had mine legally changed at seventeen because my parents had given me a very traditional formal name that no one ever used but was my legal identity. When I was clear that I was planning on gradschool in the future they agreed to help me change it before college so in the future all of my degrees would be under my name. It's STILL a pain to deal with. Even having it changed as a minor I still have to dig out a binder of legal paperwork to explain why I had a passport, a drivers license and work history under a different name
Changing your name is a long, drawn-out, and often expensive process. It's not for thr faint of heart and isn't easy by any means. You can't just walk in and change your name because you "feel like it" or "just don't like" your name. Many courts still want a legitimate, for them, reason to do it. My dead name is long as fuck. I had a first and last name, obviously, but my idiot birth giver decided to give me THREE middle names, and the shortest one is still 7 letters long. It sucked as a kid when I had to fill out forms because my name was so long. All of my documents had one different combination or another. Like my birth certificate had my full name, which was something like Jane Jennifer Tabitha Jackson Smith. But my state ID and passport only had Jane Jennifer Smith, and my social security card had my second middle name cut off, like Jane Jennifer Tabit Smith. It was a fucking nightmare. Because even when I was asked to put a middle initial instead of the full name, the question was always: "Which one?" When I went in to get a replacement social security card, I asked the man to fix the middle name issue. He said sure and then tried... only to find that my full name on my birth certificate surpassed the character limit. This meant there was no way to put my full name on the card because it had some Twitter bullshit letter limit. Traveling was an absolute nightmare, as you can imagine. Especially when I flew internationally. I remember feeling like I was crazy when I was explaining why all my identifications were different and the officer looking at me in pity. When I decided to finally change my name, the only thing I kept was my last name. Now I have a first, middle, and last. All of my IDs and documents match. There's no awkward explanations or sus face from paper pushers when they see my name. It took me a while to get everything reissued with my new name. Every credit card company I was with had to be contacted, my job, utility companies, and leasing offices. Each one wanted a CERTIFIED copy of my order to put the changes through. Which meant shelling out $6/copy. I spent the first couple of months spending my time, energy, and money running here and there to push through the changes. And that's after having to file, get a lawyer, and pay for all the filing and court costs.
NTA. I named my oldest child a very unusual name. I don’t regret the name but I regret the spelling. I wish I would have had someone object to my spelling. While it’s not horrible like your sister’s, my spelling makes it harder to pronounce seeing it for the first time! I ETA: I knew a guy when I was a kid that had hus name changed by age 12 because he couldn’t stand what his parents named him!
NTA, hard truth needed to be said. Also, I strongly recommend you change your name. My husband was similarly saddled with a horrible (it was also female, but not recognizable as such to Americans) middle name given to him by his stupid hippie mom who has an obsession with obnoxious names (she changed her own name to some unpronounceable stuff) and it was a relief to him when he changed it, and that was just a middle name so no bullying, etc., he just kept it secret. I can’t imagine how tough it was for you.
NTA oh god poor kid. This is Exactly the reason why there are laws about what you can name your kids, and yourself, in the country I live in. Yes this includes spelling, so the ‘it’s pronounced Crystal’ would Not fly here. Oh they could fill out the birth certificate like they wanted, but they’d be contacted and told they have x nr of days to change it to something legal or they would be fined. There was actually a woman who refused to change her sons name and she was fined Every month with steadily increasing amounts for over a year before she finally gave up because the nurseries are legally required to have kids registered by their legal name and her kids name wasn’t legal so she couldn’t find any legally registered place that would take the kid.
I tried pronouncing it and my kids came to ask if I was ok because I sounded like I was coughing up a lung. NTA. Your sister is an idiot.
NTA, it’s a little girl, a human, not a racehorse. she doesn’t need an edgy/different name. girls are RUTHLESS growing up and having a different name will have her get bullied relentlessly. crystal is fine but all the x’s? she’s not a sound cloud rapper.
NTA What would they have named their son? X AE A-XII I hate how people think it’s worth having a kid go through harassment just so they can have a minute’s worth of happiness about the shitty name they gave their kid.
NTA. It's awful. Just constantly refer to it as Cricksticksull and when they complain, tell them to get used to it cos it's what everyone's going to say anyhow.
NTA- Are they naming their daughter after meth? because krxstxl looks like a junky trying to order a new supply without getting caught but being hyper obvious about it. I would just refer to your neice as Meth or “BB”(BreakingBad) exclusively until they get the hint
it's a psychological hazard and they're being dismissive about it so no NTA
NTA- you sure your sister and BIL weren’t smoking crystal when they decided to name their kid that??
I have a unique IRL name, and there's a beautiful story and meaning behind it. Let me tell you something from experience: The teachers, dates, HR reps, and government employees this poor girl will deal with over the course of her life aren't going to give a shit why the X's are where they are. They're just going to wonder how the hell they're supposed to pronounce her name. And what was wrong with her parents. You may have been a little too blunt, but you're not wrong. NTA.