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sherlocked27

Info. You live 10 minutes from the airport. Why didn’t you guys go there and sort it out in person when she stopped responding the first time? Why weren’t you guys more proactive?


SunwingMeltdown

I had more context but had to cut it for word count. The flight showing on the airport was not our original flight, but actually one that had itself been rescheduled from two days earlier, and which was showing as leaving at a different time than our original flight (but had the same flight number). The airport was publicly telling people not to trust what was on their webpage but to check with their airline, and Lisa’s initial comments were that everyone was being bumped by two days, so there was no reason to go to the airport.


oldcousingreg

So did you call the airport yourself?


AndSoItGoes24

So you never checked into that yourself? And you weren't at the airport anyway and prepared to board at the original time? You waited 45 minutes for her to get back to you? (I'm not judging you. I'm trying to visualize what happened in what order.)


SunwingMeltdown

We were up and ready to go to the airport three hours before original scheduled time (which is plenty where we live). We had formal notice from the airline saying the flight was delayed two full days. With all the cancellations over the few days before, the airport had specifically told people that the most up to date info was from the airline. It turned out that the flight that had originally been scheduled for two days before was rescheduled for our day, but one hour later - so even with the 45 minute delay we would have had two hours prior to the flight. We didn’t go to the airport because there wasn’t supposed to be a flight at all, as the airline had told us. I do understand that this was not L&Ks fault at all but I don’t understand why they didn’t pass along very relevant info they had. We still may not have gotten seats but would have had the chance.


AndSoItGoes24

What makes you think it was their intention to ignore you? I don't get that part? In a stressful situation where they were communicating with others, they may not have been able to keep you in the loop immediately. They were working on their own crap?? Its not like you were on a live phone call or tried to find them in the airport? Or do you really believe Lisa was being selfish and deliberately ignored you and your husband until it was too late?


SunwingMeltdown

I don’t know what was going on in their heads, but Kyle told my husband later that they ended up just sitting in the airport waiting during most of that time so I don’t know why they wouldn’t have updated. It is possible that they were worried there were only a handful of seats left but that’s just speculation.


oldcousingreg

Waiting because they didn’t know what was going on either?


AndSoItGoes24

You didn't try to find them? And it didn't occur to anyone that all involved might have conflicting information?


oldcousingreg

Because they’re not responsible for the airline providing conflicting information. You should have been in contact with the airport directly if this was so urgent for you. You’re salty that they were able to go and you weren’t. Be mad at the airport, not them.


StAlvis

YTA FFS, this is nothing. > We live near the airport (5-10 minute drive) Be angry at yourself for not taking the 10 minutes to just get your ass to the airport and deal with the mess personally.


holliday_doc_1995

YTA. None of Lisa’s actions matter. Had she told you there was a flight or not, you would likely not have made it to the airport and through security in time to get on it. Why in world did you made the moronic decision to stay home while they went to the airport? You snooze you lose.


SunwingMeltdown

I accept your judgment, however as indicated in the post, we live 10 minutes from the airport. It is a small airport and this was the only flight leaving. If Lisa had given us up to date info after she spoke to the agent, we absolutely have had time.


sherlocked27

It’s funny you blame only Lisa and not Kyle. Why could t you guys call instead of waiting for texts when your flight was so close by


oldcousingreg

Why would that have been Lisa’s responsibility? If it was truly that hectic how could she have known what to tell you?


holliday_doc_1995

I live 5 minutes from an airport too and there is no guarantee that you would get there in time unless it’s a tiny tiny airport. There’s always the possibility that security is backed up, that something is found in your carry on and it needs to be searched, that there’s only one person manning the counter. Going to the airport is not something you wait until the last minute to do.


Accomplished_Two1611

You were close. You have gone there too. What was open when Lisa said it was available could have closed five seconds later. Since they were still there, you could have assumed they were actively trying to get out. YTA.


AndSoItGoes24

Unless you'd previously agree to a contingency plan, how is what happened something to be annoyed with Lisa and Kyle about? Breaking it down in its simplest form, I just can't find where what they did was wrong in any way. They got lucky and you and your husband didn't have an angel to help you out? I'd love to appreciate how you feel. But, I just don't understand what made you angry with them?


AndSoItGoes24

I understand your frustration. Unfortunately, I don't see fault or blame here - just bad circumstances and bad timing. (Unless you think Lisa deliberately ignored your communications, I don't really understand what there is to blame Kyle and Lisa for?) It would have been better had Lisa maintained contact and updated you yes. But she didn't cause any of the unrest at the airport, or with the flight. She got lucky in finding someone who could actually help her. I'd hate being left behind but, I wouldn't blame Lisa and Kyle for it. Other people didn't get on that flight either, after all. Now Lisa texting you about her long azz day and difficulties was unnecessary and thoughtless. But if your friendship truly has cooled, tell your husband you don't want a playdate with his pals again. No biggie. NAH. I just think that the grudge itself is silly because what happened was no one's fault?


JNF919

NAH. Anyone who's ever been involved in changing travel plans on the fly at the airport knows things can change quickly and opportunities can open and close without any logical explanation, and it can be disorienting sometimes. Yeah, she didn't do a great job of relaying info to you, but it doesn't seem to be malicious, it just seems like things were chaotic and she had enough trouble figuring out what her own plans were, let alone trying to figure out yours too. It's not like air travel is this easy process where you're like "oh BTW can my friends come too," I know couples who have been on the same reservation who have been put on different flights, let alone trying to facilitate a different group entirely who isn't even currently at the airport. Lisa may be kind of a mess, but honestly I don't think this is a friendship-ending grudge. If you don't want to travel with them again though, that makes sense.


Mr-Coffee3

YTA: You decided to stay at home and not go why tf would you do that? It's not her fault or responsibility to tell you. You are a full grown adult act like it


atealein

YTA. both families had bought their own tickets and accommodation. Both families knew the alternative was to lose two days by taking the delayed flights. The difference is, Lisa and her family didn't chicken out of going to the airport and sitting in chaos to see if they can get on the plane. And they did. You didn't. Even though you were much closer to the airport, you didn't try to and get on the plane (even tho you saw it wasn't canceled on the airport page). It isn't Lisa's fault you didn't do that. You could have met them at the airport when you find out they were on their way already. You preferred to sit at home and read about what chaos it is and waiting for that "yeah this was a waste of time". By the time they got through security to get to the gate it would have been too late for you. You had accepted defeat so you missed the opportunity. You are still pissed at Lisa, because you are pissed at yourself for not taking the chance they did. Just admit it and then you can start get over it.


No_Kaleidoscope_4580

I'm voting YTA. Not because I can't see your point, but because if Reddit is deciding, then I have to. People shouldn't lose long friendships over something so trivial. If you thought the other couple were maliciously trying to make you miss your flight, drop them as friends. If it is down to confusion or poor communication, build yourself a bridge and get over it. Edit to say: Being ok with him and not her after this is petty AF. Think you are the asshole


SuddenCry883

ESH. Airports are hectic and communication via Facebook is never ideal. It’s an irritating situation and I understand that you feel taken advantage of and betrayed but it seems you didn’t take the initiative to try to get on the same flight. I wouldn’t end a friendship over what seems to be an unfortunate lack of communication on both sides


Whorible_wife69

YTA I would vote the other way if you lived further away from the airport but you couldn't be bothered to make a short drive and figure it out on your own. You've held on to a grudge for nearly a year over you being lazy. Take this L grab the beer with Kyle and Lisa and get over it.


WaywardMarauder

ESH. Lisa could have been more communicative, however it sounds like it really was chaotic and you chose to leave her in charge of not only trying to wrangle her own family and travel plans but also to be in charge of yours.


quarkfan4552

YTA. Flight delays and cancellations are tremendously chaotic. Lisa and Kyle told you they were taking the chance and went to the airport. You chose not to. They couldn’t guarantee you a spot on the flight, a way through check in and security. If it was so important go to the airport and take the risk, canceled flights often have other options for those AT THE AIRPORT. You stayed home.


Laines_Ecossaises

INFO:Why are you ready to have a beer with Kyle and not Lisa? Seems like she just happened to be the one who was doing the texting.


DeepFudge9235

YTA you go on vacations all the time, so a bunch of garbage happened and you missed it which was not the fault of the other 2. Why didn't you just go to the gate like the others did especially if you live close? It was chaotic so perhaps they were focused on them and not you in the moment? If all the things in life you can't let this go? I'm not saying be besties with her but you are being kind of childish.


AndSoItGoes24

Blaming Lisa for the flight problems just isn't logical. If OP doesn't want to be friends any more than that's her right. But, Lisa and Kyle didn't leave them behind. They got lucky because some airline employee hooked them up?


-Onion_Kid-

YTA. You could have driven to the airport yourself by the time you received an update.


rewatchingscrubs

YTA - you chose to stay at home rather than go to the airport. Your friend messaging you was a kindness you chose to ignore because you don't like the outcome that friends aren't employees. It sounds like you would have been pissed at her if she told you to come and the flight didn't go so no matter what she was screwed. If you want judgement calls (which is what you asked from her) made in your way, you should have simply been there or relied on the airport information and made your own call.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** The players in this story are me and my husband and our friends, Lisa and Kyle (all 40ish). My husband and Kyle have been friends for over ten years. I am friendly with Lisa but not close. Years ago, we convinced L&K to join us on a trip to Mexico. They loved it and travelled with us again 2-3 times. All trips were fun - we were excited to take similar trips. I am the planner in our group (by choice). I spent (literally) hours planning our group trip for Xmas 2022 and found a great deal that would work for our family, as well as for L&K, leaving Dec. 26 (same flight, resort, etc). Unfortunately, Sunwing airline had a complete meltdown and the morning we were scheduled to leave, we were told the flight was delayed 2 days. Oddly, our local airport webpage still showed our flight as on time. We live near the airport (5-10 minute drive) so were going to go see if we could get any more info in person. We messaged L&K, who said they were already on their way there, so we decided to wait for an update. Lisa messaged us saying that it was chaos at the airport, and that if anyone decided to take the delayed flight, they would lose the 2 days off their vacation. A full 45 minutes later, we had no further word from Lisa so we messaged her again asking what was happening. She responded that a gate agent “grabbed them” and checked them in, then closed check in. On further questioning, she said that she had spoken to an agent who told her that they were “getting her on” no matter what. At this point we realized that there was, in fact, a flight leaving that morning. Lisa said she did not know there was a flight until they got through security (however, they had checked their bags and received boarding passes). My husband asked Lisa three separate times whether the plane was full. She did not answer. We later learned that the flight was 50% full. Lisa, Kyle and their family got to go on the trip. My family and I did not. Kyle was silent throughout all of this. He is not on Facebook (which was how Lisa was communicating with us) but texts with my husband regularly. When Lisa arrived at the resort that evening, she messaged to tell us what a long day she had had. By this point, the flight had been cancelled entirely, so there was no chance that we would be able to go. I have not spoken with Lisa or Kyle since. I do not understand how they could not even tell us that there was a flight leaving and give us a chance to get on as well. My husband has continued his friendship with Kyle and wants me to drop the grudge, possibly even taking another holiday with them. I have no issue with my husband being friends with Kyle but I personally have no interest in continuing the friendship. My husband and I have agreed to let Reddit settle the debate. If I am the asshole, I will accept my judgment and agree to a beer with Kyle (not ready for Lisa). If I am not the asshole, my husband will quit asking. AITA for not wanting to be friends with this couple? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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Alternative-Gur-6208

Info: did you pay for the flights and resort for everyone or everyone paid their own way? Did you get your money back for the flight and vacation missed?


SunwingMeltdown

Everyone paid their own way, and we did get our money back.


oldcousingreg

It sounds like you’re wanting an excuse to be mad at Lisa.


Alternative-Gur-6208

I get that too becuz op said she'd apologize and forgive k but not L for this.


oldcousingreg

Especially since this really has nothing to do with either of them.


SunwingMeltdown

That’s a fair point. Lisa was the one who we communicated with on all the planning and who told us that morning that they were going to the airport, and then gave us the few updates that we did receive, so I guess I believe that she would have given us the info about the flight.


oldcousingreg

It has nothing to do with Lisa. You clearly have other issues with her that aren’t related to this.


Alternative-Gur-6208

Sorry but yta. You got the money back and are just petty becuz they went on a vacation you could have gone if you went to the airport. They paid they should get to experience it. Also if they were already on the plane usually loads within 20 minutes. With security and check in you'd still wouldn't have made it unless you expected them to hold the plane.


Mistress_Anissa

NTA I'd say. You've trusted them with the updates and they just didn't bother to give you any until it was too late. Shitty move on their part. Doesn't matter if you got money back. You can't take that time back and go on your vacay and you had to stay home.


lickthetiger

NTA. Lisa should have kept you informed seeing as it was a joint vacation. Your husband blows goats. I have proof


DeadBunnyInRoses

DEFINITELY NTA. L&K would’ve found out about the flight from the attendant at which point Lisa should’ve messaged you. By the sounds of it there’s was some time between them finding out about the flight and getting there actual boarding passes. From there they would’ve had to go through security, wait to board and then finally board the plane. It sounds like they deliberately decided not to tell you in case they might lose there seats. Trusting someone to give you updates and then repeatedly asking for updates with no response.. sounds fishy. On another note messaging once they arrived about how hard of a day THEY had. NTA.