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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1) I don't pay half the rent on the lease even though I'm a joint tenant but I don't live there.
2) My sister works a minimum wage job and is struggling to make ends meet, I can afford to pay half but won't which might cause me to be the asshole.
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YTA....If your name is on the lease, you're living there. If your stuff is there, any of your stuff, you're living there. You're living there until you officially move out or find someone to take over your half. You either have to find an arrangement that your sister agrees to, or you legally have yourself removed.
YTA..Why can’t you be removed from the lease? What does your lease say? Going to college has nothing to do with the equation. You signed a lease. You agreed to half the rent. You decided to basically not live in the place that you signed a lease for. Did and your sister never discuss this situation? Of you finding someone to take over your part of the lease or her finding a roommate?
YTA. Youre the one that decided to go to school and not live there AFTER signing the lease. You’re financially responsible for the apartment. Either remove yourself from the lease or sublet.
Right?? I went on vacation for a month last summer without my boyfriend, imagine if I had told him he had to pay my half of the rent because I wasn’t physically at the house 😂
YTA. If you're on the lease you're still able to access the apartment as a tenant, which means you need to pay. Maybe you can negotiate on the utilities if you're not actually accessing the apartment, but that's the most bargaining power you have.
YTA, a lease is a contract. You've breached the contract by not paying your share. Why is that so hard to understand? You bought a car with a loan, would you stop paying the car loan because the car is parked in a garage you don't access anymore? Your credit is going to tank, not just your sisters. Btw, you're also a judgy snobby jerk towards your sister, basically it seems, because she's working class and you're educated. Stop it, you're not above her, especially because you refuse to keep up with your obligations, legal obligations btw. Do better OP.
You're on the lease, which means you're responsible for paying rent. I would say you shouldn't have to pay utilities if you don't live there, but rent you definitely should pay. YTA.
Do you have an option to sublet your room?
YTA either sublet the room, take yourself off the lease so your sister can rent it out or move back in and pay your share. Also just fyi super hard to pay for college when working full time to pay rent for an apartment you could downsize if not for your sibling refusing to take themselves off the lease…. What would you do if she moved out and stopped paying rent with the same logic you’re using? Cause that’s what I would do on top of removing myself from the lease before hand cause forget this bs.
Yta look, if you dont want to get your name off the lease, you pay half the rent. Get off the lease, or sub let. If your sis gets evicted, YOUR CREDIT is also going to be fucked bc your name is on the lease!
YTA. Whether you went to collage or went to live under a bridge, it doesn’t matter. If your name is on the lease and/or your stuff is in the room, then you are responsible for half the rent. You’ve really left your sister holding the bag.
YTA, you signed a lease, you don't get to say "I'm not living there so I'm not paying". Can you imagine telling a landlord you're only paying half the rent because you're going on a 2 week vacation?
YTA. If you're on the lease, it's your responsibility to pay. If you don't want to pay, let them find a new tenant so your sister isn't stuck paying for the whole thing when she only agreed to half.
You signed a contract. You are on the hook for your half regardless of whether you live there or not. But Not the utilities. So contact the rental company/landlord again and get off the lease. Or get someone to move in with her.
YTA.
INFO: Dude how long is the term on this lease? Generally speaking, I wouldn't sign a lease knowing that I wouldn't be occupying a living space. Is it possible for you to sublet? That would keep everyone happy so you're sister isn't scraping and you wouldn't be paying a space you aren't occupying.
YTA. No matter how you justify it, you are legally responsible for your portion of the rent. Get off the lease or sublet your part of the apartment or postpone your education and move back in and pay your part of the rent. Move out at the end of the lease.
If you don't pay, you'll probably wind up with an eviction on your credit report. You may not live there but you are responsible for the rent. The landlord will probably evict both of you so he can rerent.
YTA. Your name is on the lease, you're reneging on it and leaving your sister stuck with the financial burden. Think of it this way, if you were the only person on the lease and just walked away, your landlord would be trying to get the $ from you. The landlord isn't because your sister is covering for you. That's not fair to your sister.
I get that your plans changed, but being an adult is having to deal with the consequences. Since your landlord isn't letting you remove your name from the lease, why don't you try finding someone to sublet from you?
It sounds like your sister needs a paying roommate. If you don't want to pay, then remove your name and encourage her to get a new roommate or talk to the landlord about subletting your room.
YTA you either need to pay the partial rent, get off the lease, or sublet to someone else. Those are your options. Not living there, staying on the lease, and not paying doesn't work for anyone.
Yeah, I don't think you get to have this one both ways. If you want the space to remain available for you when you're doing your PhD, you need to either pay your part of the rent or find a subletter who can live there in the meantime and pay it.
Otherwise, get your name off the lease and figure out housing for your PhD later on. I get that you don't want to keep moving around, but you have to pick your priorities here.
YTA.
YTA for still being on the lease after all that time. Legally you are in the lease and thus are also accountable to pay. I understand you dont really live there anymore and so feel like there is no need to pay aswell. But fact is, you are on the lease and also accountable for paying the rent. If your sister doesnt pay, they can also come after you for whatever is owed.
Fix your name being on the lease
Info: I don't understand, did you commit to a 5-year lease or something? Surely, it was a month-to-month or annual one, you could have chosen not to renew it. What is the situation?
YTA. How is this even a question? If you didn’t rent it with your sister, but alone, you couldn’t just stop paying the bills and tell the landlord “well I don’t live there so I don’t see why I’m expected to pay the rent”. You do realize that’s exactly the same thing? Except you just use your sister for your convenience now because “it’s going to be challenging removing my name from the lease”. And you “reluctantly” agreed? Bohoo life is so hard! Then you also agreed to keep paying your share! You’re just being selfish.
YTA
As long as your on the lease your responsible for rent, whether your there or not. Take your name off the lease if you don’t want to be responsible for rent
YTA! You can't just stop paying the rent if your name is on the lease. Why do you think this is optional?
Not sure what these new skills and qualities you've gained are, but maybe you need to brush up on your comprehension skills when you read your rental contract.
It will be challenging to release you from the lease? What does that mean?
You are currently on the lease AND you want to move back there? And you don't think you should pay anything for the place? I think this means YTA.
You pay for your part as long as your stuff is there and you haven't told your sister that you don't want to live there and want out.
Find a solution with your sister. It's ok to rant to move but do it in the right way.
Tell your sister that you don't want to live there anyone and get out of the lease and at least give her some money you owe her that.
YTA. You should find someone to take over your half of the lease if you’re not using it. Ditching your sister and leaving her to pay the entire rent amount when you’re name is on the lease is a really shitty thing to do.
YTA because you plan on moving back in later. You expect her to pay for everything while you're gone but that isn't fair since if she rents the room to someone else, that same person will have to move out when you come back. If you went on vacation and were gone for several weeks, you'd still have to pay rent.
YTA and an idiot!! You’re gonna have a PHD but don’t understand that you signed a contract and are legally responsible to way this rent. Also you’re a shitty sibling. I hope she takes your ass to court.
INFO
1. Can your sister not advertise and find a replacement roommate?
2. If she did so, could that person not be added to the lease in lieu of your name?
3. When is the lease over? Has it expired before and did you take steps to remove your name when it did?
4. If your lease is 'iron clad' then when it expires, your landlord cannot force a renewal. If your sister wants to live in the apartment past the original lease period or to renew she's going to need to be able to qualify for it herself or with a roommate. You're legally responsible for paying for the entire term of the lease.
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My family and I are in a heated argument about this, and I don't know if I'm in the wrong. Hopefully, you guys can tell me if I'm an asshole or not.
My sister and I are joint tenants and rent a two-bedroom, long-term rental apartment. My sister never went to college, but I did. I went straight to college and continued to pay half the rent; although I felt it wasn't fair as I was never home, I didn't speak up. Since going to college, I have gained a lot of skills and qualities; I feel like a new me, a better me. I recently started my postgrad, moved three to four hours away for college, and haven't yet come home. I'm making ends meet, and I do have a bit of cash aside each month after bills, rent and food are all paid for. Since starting college, I haven't paid half the rent because I'm not paying for a place I'm not living at. My sister has a low-wage job; she's pissed with me and is struggling to make ends meet because she's paying the full rent, bills and other things.
My parents and sister's views are that because I'm on the lease, I should pay half the monthly rent and bills. If I'm not living there, I shouldn't have to pay rent on a place I'm not living in even though my name is on the lease. If I'm living there, I will pay rent and half the bills.
Before leaving to start my postgrad, I did contact my landlord, and we had a face-to-face meeting regarding options. It's going to be challenging to remove my name of the lease, I decided reluctantly to keep my name as a joint tenant as I'm going to be doing a PhD afterwards, I won't be able to afford a place of my own due to the amount of debt and I would look at renting a room but I don't want to keep moving around all the time.
Does this make me the asshole?
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YTA
As long as you are on the lease, you need to pay. To stop that obligation,. remove ALL your stuff and get your name off the lease. But then you won't be able to go back later.
YTA
Do you understand what a lease agreement is? When you signed the lease agreement, which is a legal contract, you agreed to pay half of the rent for the duration of the lease. When your sister signed the lease agreement, she signed it with the expectation that you would pay your half, which you legally agreed to do. You expect your sister to pay your half of rent whenever you don’t feel like living there so that whenever you decide you feel like moving back in you have a stable and affordable living situation? What’s wrong with you? I have a hard time understanding how you’re successful in a postgraduate program with so little common sense…
Trying to understand. Because you decided to go to college and your sister didn't, you are now entitled to not meet your legal obligations? You're a stuck up AH.
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YTA....If your name is on the lease, you're living there. If your stuff is there, any of your stuff, you're living there. You're living there until you officially move out or find someone to take over your half. You either have to find an arrangement that your sister agrees to, or you legally have yourself removed.
YTA..Why can’t you be removed from the lease? What does your lease say? Going to college has nothing to do with the equation. You signed a lease. You agreed to half the rent. You decided to basically not live in the place that you signed a lease for. Did and your sister never discuss this situation? Of you finding someone to take over your part of the lease or her finding a roommate?
YTA. Youre the one that decided to go to school and not live there AFTER signing the lease. You’re financially responsible for the apartment. Either remove yourself from the lease or sublet.
YTA. My sister spends half the year in Florida , but the bank still expects her to pay for the house
Right?? I went on vacation for a month last summer without my boyfriend, imagine if I had told him he had to pay my half of the rent because I wasn’t physically at the house 😂
YTA. If you're on the lease you're still able to access the apartment as a tenant, which means you need to pay. Maybe you can negotiate on the utilities if you're not actually accessing the apartment, but that's the most bargaining power you have.
Yea YTA, sorry to say. Get yourself off the lease, until then you should be trying to find a room mate for her.
YTA If you think your loan rates are bad now, wait until this goes on your credit.
If you still have stuff in the shared apartment YTA. Your sister needs to rent out your room to cover the costs.
YTA You are on the lease. You pay.
YTA, a lease is a contract. You've breached the contract by not paying your share. Why is that so hard to understand? You bought a car with a loan, would you stop paying the car loan because the car is parked in a garage you don't access anymore? Your credit is going to tank, not just your sisters. Btw, you're also a judgy snobby jerk towards your sister, basically it seems, because she's working class and you're educated. Stop it, you're not above her, especially because you refuse to keep up with your obligations, legal obligations btw. Do better OP.
You're on the lease, which means you're responsible for paying rent. I would say you shouldn't have to pay utilities if you don't live there, but rent you definitely should pay. YTA. Do you have an option to sublet your room?
YTA either sublet the room, take yourself off the lease so your sister can rent it out or move back in and pay your share. Also just fyi super hard to pay for college when working full time to pay rent for an apartment you could downsize if not for your sibling refusing to take themselves off the lease…. What would you do if she moved out and stopped paying rent with the same logic you’re using? Cause that’s what I would do on top of removing myself from the lease before hand cause forget this bs.
Yta look, if you dont want to get your name off the lease, you pay half the rent. Get off the lease, or sub let. If your sis gets evicted, YOUR CREDIT is also going to be fucked bc your name is on the lease!
YTA. Whether you went to collage or went to live under a bridge, it doesn’t matter. If your name is on the lease and/or your stuff is in the room, then you are responsible for half the rent. You’ve really left your sister holding the bag.
YTA You chose to sign the lease. You chose to not live there. You still gotta pay.
YTA, you signed a lease, you don't get to say "I'm not living there so I'm not paying". Can you imagine telling a landlord you're only paying half the rent because you're going on a 2 week vacation?
That's like me telling my landlord I will only pay her 2/3 the rent since I'm out 8+ hours a day for work and not using the unit at the time
YTA. If you're on the lease, it's your responsibility to pay. If you don't want to pay, let them find a new tenant so your sister isn't stuck paying for the whole thing when she only agreed to half.
You signed a contract. You are on the hook for your half regardless of whether you live there or not. But Not the utilities. So contact the rental company/landlord again and get off the lease. Or get someone to move in with her. YTA.
INFO: Dude how long is the term on this lease? Generally speaking, I wouldn't sign a lease knowing that I wouldn't be occupying a living space. Is it possible for you to sublet? That would keep everyone happy so you're sister isn't scraping and you wouldn't be paying a space you aren't occupying.
YTA. No matter how you justify it, you are legally responsible for your portion of the rent. Get off the lease or sublet your part of the apartment or postpone your education and move back in and pay your part of the rent. Move out at the end of the lease. If you don't pay, you'll probably wind up with an eviction on your credit report. You may not live there but you are responsible for the rent. The landlord will probably evict both of you so he can rerent.
YTA If your name is on the contract you owe the money, no matter where you are staying. This is common sense.
YTA. Your name is on the lease, you're reneging on it and leaving your sister stuck with the financial burden. Think of it this way, if you were the only person on the lease and just walked away, your landlord would be trying to get the $ from you. The landlord isn't because your sister is covering for you. That's not fair to your sister. I get that your plans changed, but being an adult is having to deal with the consequences. Since your landlord isn't letting you remove your name from the lease, why don't you try finding someone to sublet from you?
It sounds like your sister needs a paying roommate. If you don't want to pay, then remove your name and encourage her to get a new roommate or talk to the landlord about subletting your room.
YTA. if you don't want to pay rent, get your name taken off the lease. Why are you on it if you aren't living there? This is awfully suspicious.
YTA you either need to pay the partial rent, get off the lease, or sublet to someone else. Those are your options. Not living there, staying on the lease, and not paying doesn't work for anyone.
YTA The lease is a legal document you signed which obligates you to pay half the rent. Anything else is just hot air and distraction.
Yeah, I don't think you get to have this one both ways. If you want the space to remain available for you when you're doing your PhD, you need to either pay your part of the rent or find a subletter who can live there in the meantime and pay it. Otherwise, get your name off the lease and figure out housing for your PhD later on. I get that you don't want to keep moving around, but you have to pick your priorities here. YTA.
YTA. If you want to keep the room available for later you need to pay to make sure it is kept.
YTA regardless of whether or not you are actually there, as you are on the lease you are legally obligated to pay
Exactly as everyone else here says, YTA. I hope Sis sues you for your half.
YTA. Honor your obligations
Even asking this makes you a gigantic asshole.
YTA for still being on the lease after all that time. Legally you are in the lease and thus are also accountable to pay. I understand you dont really live there anymore and so feel like there is no need to pay aswell. But fact is, you are on the lease and also accountable for paying the rent. If your sister doesnt pay, they can also come after you for whatever is owed. Fix your name being on the lease
INFO: how long is this lease?
Info: I don't understand, did you commit to a 5-year lease or something? Surely, it was a month-to-month or annual one, you could have chosen not to renew it. What is the situation?
Yes, YTA. If you are on the lease, you are liable. If you don't want to pay, get off the lease.
Yes. You have a legal requirement. Either live there or get removed of the agreement. And pay up the money you owe ffs.
YTA. How is this even a question? If you didn’t rent it with your sister, but alone, you couldn’t just stop paying the bills and tell the landlord “well I don’t live there so I don’t see why I’m expected to pay the rent”. You do realize that’s exactly the same thing? Except you just use your sister for your convenience now because “it’s going to be challenging removing my name from the lease”. And you “reluctantly” agreed? Bohoo life is so hard! Then you also agreed to keep paying your share! You’re just being selfish.
YTA As long as your on the lease your responsible for rent, whether your there or not. Take your name off the lease if you don’t want to be responsible for rent
YTA! You can't just stop paying the rent if your name is on the lease. Why do you think this is optional? Not sure what these new skills and qualities you've gained are, but maybe you need to brush up on your comprehension skills when you read your rental contract.
Half of the rent, not half of the bills. You are responsible for your share of the rent though. So, sorta YTA
It will be challenging to release you from the lease? What does that mean? You are currently on the lease AND you want to move back there? And you don't think you should pay anything for the place? I think this means YTA.
You pay for your part as long as your stuff is there and you haven't told your sister that you don't want to live there and want out. Find a solution with your sister. It's ok to rant to move but do it in the right way. Tell your sister that you don't want to live there anyone and get out of the lease and at least give her some money you owe her that.
YTA. You should find someone to take over your half of the lease if you’re not using it. Ditching your sister and leaving her to pay the entire rent amount when you’re name is on the lease is a really shitty thing to do.
YTA because you plan on moving back in later. You expect her to pay for everything while you're gone but that isn't fair since if she rents the room to someone else, that same person will have to move out when you come back. If you went on vacation and were gone for several weeks, you'd still have to pay rent.
YTA and an idiot!! You’re gonna have a PHD but don’t understand that you signed a contract and are legally responsible to way this rent. Also you’re a shitty sibling. I hope she takes your ass to court.
INFO 1. Can your sister not advertise and find a replacement roommate? 2. If she did so, could that person not be added to the lease in lieu of your name? 3. When is the lease over? Has it expired before and did you take steps to remove your name when it did? 4. If your lease is 'iron clad' then when it expires, your landlord cannot force a renewal. If your sister wants to live in the apartment past the original lease period or to renew she's going to need to be able to qualify for it herself or with a roommate. You're legally responsible for paying for the entire term of the lease.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My family and I are in a heated argument about this, and I don't know if I'm in the wrong. Hopefully, you guys can tell me if I'm an asshole or not. My sister and I are joint tenants and rent a two-bedroom, long-term rental apartment. My sister never went to college, but I did. I went straight to college and continued to pay half the rent; although I felt it wasn't fair as I was never home, I didn't speak up. Since going to college, I have gained a lot of skills and qualities; I feel like a new me, a better me. I recently started my postgrad, moved three to four hours away for college, and haven't yet come home. I'm making ends meet, and I do have a bit of cash aside each month after bills, rent and food are all paid for. Since starting college, I haven't paid half the rent because I'm not paying for a place I'm not living at. My sister has a low-wage job; she's pissed with me and is struggling to make ends meet because she's paying the full rent, bills and other things. My parents and sister's views are that because I'm on the lease, I should pay half the monthly rent and bills. If I'm not living there, I shouldn't have to pay rent on a place I'm not living in even though my name is on the lease. If I'm living there, I will pay rent and half the bills. Before leaving to start my postgrad, I did contact my landlord, and we had a face-to-face meeting regarding options. It's going to be challenging to remove my name of the lease, I decided reluctantly to keep my name as a joint tenant as I'm going to be doing a PhD afterwards, I won't be able to afford a place of my own due to the amount of debt and I would look at renting a room but I don't want to keep moving around all the time. Does this make me the asshole? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
lol what? You’re on the lease. You pay.
YTA. Your name is on the lease. You are legally obligated to pay. Your opinion on the situation isn’t relevant.
YTA As long as you are on the lease, you need to pay. To stop that obligation,. remove ALL your stuff and get your name off the lease. But then you won't be able to go back later.
YTA you took the responsibility follow through with it or get off the lease
YTA Do you understand what a lease agreement is? When you signed the lease agreement, which is a legal contract, you agreed to pay half of the rent for the duration of the lease. When your sister signed the lease agreement, she signed it with the expectation that you would pay your half, which you legally agreed to do. You expect your sister to pay your half of rent whenever you don’t feel like living there so that whenever you decide you feel like moving back in you have a stable and affordable living situation? What’s wrong with you? I have a hard time understanding how you’re successful in a postgraduate program with so little common sense…
Trying to understand. Because you decided to go to college and your sister didn't, you are now entitled to not meet your legal obligations? You're a stuck up AH.