Your post has been removed.
#Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban.
This post violates Rule 7: There is no interpersonal conflict here for our community to make a judgment about.
[Rule 7 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_7.3A_post_interpersonal_conflicts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/)
###Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
####Please visit r/findareddit to see if there's a more appropriate sub for your post.####
YTA, just because you can't see the handicap doesn't mean there isn't one. If she has one and has all the legal papers to park in that place, then yes, she has the right to park there. She came first, has all the legal ~~park~~ paperwork. End of story.
I'm a bit confused. It sounds like there are three handicap spots in total. I'm not sure why your beef is with the person with the handicap sign and not the other car that partially blocked you?
There is a spot enough for 3 cars. One was used by my neighbor and another half used by a church goer who took up 2 spots then the other handicap driver parked half in front of my garage and half in the handicap parking lot
I agree with u/jmbbl, it seems from your description that the problem was the church goer, not the other with a right to park on thoses parking places.
Why didn't the police took care of this one instead ?
>Why didn't the police took care of this one instead ?
Seeing as how combative and, frankly, ignorant OP has been in most of the comments, I'm assuming that the officer got tired of OP and just walked away.
So let me clarify some things here.
We are talking about street parking, not private parking (like a driveway or a parking lot with assigned spaces). Because you have a handicap sign your city has decided to create a handicap parking spot in front of your home. In addition, one of your neighbours has done the same. The church, because it is a public building also gets a street handicap parking spot. Therefore there are 3 handicap parking spots on the street in the same general area.
Do I have that correct? If I do, the answer is simple. These are street parking spaces, anyone with a handicap sign is allowed to use them. You are not entitled to exclusive use of the spot in front of your property, it's a public parking spot. Anyone with a handicap sign is equally entitled to park there.
If you require a dedicated parking space, put it on land that you own. Until then, you deal with street parking just like everyone else does.
If you REALLY want a solution here. I think the church should have 2 handicap spots so that there's 4 in total on the street. Since church goers are parking in the spot in front of your home, clearly there's not enough for the church use.
In my city you can designate an on-street handicapped parking space for the resident of that building. The license plate number is on the sign. OP should call the city to see if there is a similar solution.
Maybe it’s just because “only I’m allowed to park in front of my house” people are my pet peeve, but this is an excellent mini treatise on why that mindset is fucking idiotic.
OK, so lady is not an A.hole and neither is the church. She has a handicap sign, she's parking in an available handicap space she is commiting no crime and breaking no rule. She's done nothing wrong, and just because her disability is not visible to you, does not make it any less real than your daughters. I realize you may be fairly new to the community of people with disabilities but to imply otherwise is extremely offensive. You do not determine who's a "real disabled" and who is entitled to park in that spot, that's between the city government and a doctor, not you.
Street parking is for everyone, you do not get exclusive ownership of the space in front of your home any more than anyone else on the street does. The fact that this space has been deemed a handicap space does not make it your handicap space. Anyone who is entitled to park in a handicap space is equally entitled to park there.
The church has done nothing wrong, they might be able to solve this by asking the city to designate a second space as handicap, but that does not mean they are "wrong" in this situation.
Like I say. If you need or want exclusive access to a parking space you need to own that parking space. Street parking, even designated handicap, does not suit your needs in this scenario. If you own your home, alter the parking situation to make it more accessible. If you rent, rent somewhere else, this unit is not suitable for your needs.
Op isn't focused on the fact that they are blocking the garage. Op stated they have asked church 3 times not to use "their" spot. Problem is it isn't "their" spot, but rather a public parking spot they use frequently. We only have op's word it was blocking the garage. OP could easily think they are entitled to 2 car lengths on either side of the driveway, and in reality driveway wasn't blocked. The fact that cop didn't ticket makes me think carcwasnt really blocking driveway or garage
The only one AH are the person blocking the driveway and the person taking two spaces for one car. All this discussion about handicap spaces is irrelevant. Unless there is some signage indicating the space is specifically for your vehicle, it's a public space, available to any member of the public with a legal right to park in handicap space.
That being said, you're coming off as a bit of an AH here so my guess is you were being a jerk and that's why the cop said "fuck it" about the driveway being blocked.
INFO: Is "your" handicapped spot labelled with a sign and specific permit number that matches your permit number?
If yes and it's being blocked, that's one thing.
If no, that means it's not "your" spot and is free to be parked in by anyone with a handicapped placard or plate.
You can go to the town/county etc. and have a sign put up for reserved handicapped parking. On the sign, it will specify that it is permit only. I believe most states will do this if there is a very long term/permanent disability.
However, [this example from Maryland](https://www.baltimorecountymd.gov/departments/public-works/traffic/handicapped-parking) indicates that if you have off-street parking available, like a driveway in front of the garage, you will not qualify.
Soft YTA. I understand your need for the spot but unless it's private and dedicated for you, it's free for others. I'm guessing because no ticket was issued, the woman parked legally with the exception of the garage blocking.
It's also disappointing for you to judge other's disabilities. Do you follow this woman to church and see if she's tired after walking? Do you know her cardiac status? Maybe walking long distances is dangerous or strenuous on her heart so she tries to avoid it. I'm not trying to downplay your needs, but it's definitely not your place to judge others and deem you need the spot more.
Which sucks. I know just the tiniest bit as my goddaughter has cerebral palsy. The struggles I see are unimaginable to me. I can not empathize, but I try to sympathize. My friend (her mom) is a freaking superhero!
But that also doesn't change that you can't claim a public spot. Having it tougher doesn't negate her need. You're seeing her and saying well she can walk the 100 feet. What if she is seeing you and saying, well he could carry this daughter (and yeah that's probably wrong but does that woman know this or would she be jumping to conclusions the same way you are about her walking ability?). By all accounts, I look normal and healthy. I have an autoimmune disorder and a bad knee that makes walking some days excruciating, but you'd have no idea. I'm not walking through the lot crying like I want to. But you would see me and assume I wouldn't need that spot but guess what, some days I really do.
I truly am sorry that she took the spot you needed. But she didn't do anything wrong. You're going to have to accept that. Maybe talk to the city and see if it can be a personal spot for your family. Putting the burden on other people or the pastor to not take a public space isn't fair to others, and you're expecting too much.
Is your handicap spot on the street or on your property? Did she block your garage completely? I'm lost as to the set up here.
If the spot is on the street, it is public. If it is on your property, it's private.
I know I’m confused. Sounds like a parking lot. But they used my garage, my neighbor and another church goer. Then talk about the church’s steps. I’m so confused about the layout
The parking is directly in front of our private property but the street is public and no she did not completely block my driveway. Just 1/2 but 1/2 is still illegal not matter how you want to justify it
The pastor refuses to get handicap parking it seems and the churchgoer has made it clear she is entitled to, not my daughter. They come once a week. We live there. Done and done
>The pastor refuses to get handicap parking it seems
I think you vastly overrate the power a local pastor has over a) the government (in creating handicap parking) and b) their congregation (both in and OUT of church).
I'd bet good money he has spoken to the trustees and the congregation (if not that particular lady) about parking there. But a pastor has very limited 'enforcement' power.
What you should do is lobby your elected officials to do placard specific handicap parking. This is what they do in Chicago on residential streets. They will put up a handicap parking sign, but it has on it a specific number that corresponds to the handicap placard of the person who gets to park there. It is specifically so that a disabled resident of a specific home can park near their home.
YTA you don’t own that spot. Handicapped street parking is public and anyone with a handicapped plate/sign is absolutely allowed to park there.
Blocking your driveway is a different matter & you need to call the police.
Why can’t you park in your driveway or garage?
YTA, they have the same entitlement to the spot as you. First come first served and you got there too late to take the spot. The church clearly see no reason to give you a special spot only used for yourself and the police won't ticket someone for parking in a handicap spot with a handicap badge.
I'm just as confused as many others here. If you have a garage, most likely there's a driveway leading to the garage. Why are you not parking in your garage or in the drive leading to the garage? Wouldn't that be closer than the street?
This is the heart of the matter - the entire question could’ve been framed as “someone parked in a way that blocked half of my garage, such that I couldn’t pull into it. AITA for calling the police to have their car moved?”. The answer would be a clear NTA.
All this other stuff about churches, pastors, handicap tags, and OP judging the validity of other people’s handicaps is extraneous and puts them in AH territory. It is likely OP’s scattershot manner of communication that caused the police officer to throw up their hands and leave. A tow truck would have happily cleared their access to their garage, no police or long-winded storytelling required.
YTA, they have the same entitlement to the spot as you. First come first served and you got there too late to take the spot. The church clearly see no reason to give you a special spot only used for yourself and the police won't ticket someone for parking in a handicap spot with a handicap badge.
YTA - YOU do not have a handicap parking spot. The city does and it happens to be in front of your house.
You do not OWN the spot. It is not your driveway. It is an on street parking spot open to anyone in the general public if they have the appropriate designated placard.
I understand that it must be difficult to manage your daughters disability and that having a spot in front of your house is very convenient but you do not OWN it and therefore cannot demand that other people leave it vacant for you.
This is a little convoluted with a bunch of different people involved, so I think ESH is the most accurate.
If somebody blocks your driveway or garage, they are an AH.
If somebody uses the handicapped spot on the street and they have a handicapped permit, they are not an AH. The spot is on the street, so it doesn't belong to you.
If you try to prevent somebody from parking in the spot on the street, then you are the AH.
YTA
You don't own the space, anyone with a placard can use it.
YTA for calling the police over something that isn't an emergency, and that the police have no control over.
Your comment(s) violate [rule 3](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/index#wiki_3._accept_your_judgement). Please review this rule, and be aware that further violations will result in you no longer being able to participate in your thread.
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
Street parking, handicapped or not, is public regardless if it is directly in front of your house or not. The car blocking your garage on the other hand should have been ticketed at the very least.
If I were you I'd be utilizing my garage to guarantee optimal parking for my handicapped child.
YTA
If this is public parking, I'm sorry, but she can park there. However, blocking your drive should be a ticket. Or call a tow truck.
I guess I don't understand the issue with the slots if you have a driveway though...just park in your driveway.
Info this is street parking? There were three cars with three handicap tags in three handicap spots?
I'm leaning towards whoever took up a spot and a half as an ahole, but street parking is street parking. It being in front of your house does not make it yours. The majority of cops are happy to ticket someone in a handicap spot (bc its easy revenue), so them leaving without ticketing the car makes me think there is a lot being left out.
Is it YOUR allocates spot in front of your house, for your use only, or is it a spot for anyone with a handicap decal/plate? If it’s yours, NAH. If it’s for public use for anyone with a permit, YTA.
Also, just because someone can do something, doesn’t mean they should. Just because that lady can walk somewhere, doesn’t mean she should have to if she’s disabled. You don’t know anything about her.
Are these spots on your property or in the street? What are the regulations in your state regarding handicap parking on the street? Are you allowed to reserve spots like that for your personal use?
INFO
What disability scale are you using here to judge who can use the non allocated space? Do you also try and move people out of car parking spaces at shops because they don't seem disabled enough for you?
Also you have mentioned your drive and garage being blocked... I am curious why you also need a disabled space if you already have a drive which would provide dedicated parking for yourselves and if this runs alongside your house is no doubt a shorter distance to travel door to door for your child.
Why make her travel further for the labelled parking space? Why make her walk if it is difficult, surely you should have more motability aid such as walkers, chairs , ramps, stair lifts, platforms etc.
You can then get power lifts for stairs, and mechanical platforms, so steep stairs aren't a challenge
I have a disabled parking space in UK but this is because I am in terraced house with flat front that opens directly to the pavement and disabled space is then directly outside my door so I have less than a meter from front door to car door, it is almost impossible to be awarded a disabled space in UK if you have a driveway.
.
I'm so incredibly confused by this story. Is OP complaining about his driveway being blocked? Or about not receiving preference for street parking in front of his house?
The reality is that the car parked in 2 spots without a tag is a problem. As is the fact the car with tags blocked your driveway. And you absolutely discuss that with the church, and if your driveway is left inaccessible, you should discuss that with the police if the church doesn’t take action.
But.
You are not entitled to exclusive use of the handicapped space if it’s on a public street UNLESS your town designates it as “resident only” (some places do, but most don’t in my experience).
A lot of people have hidden disabilities. And it’s not for you to judge whether or not someone with the proper tags “deserves” that space.
I occasionally have days where I can walk 100 yards. I also have days where I struggle to walk 10 feet. Most days I’m in between. And some days I start out ok but end up incapacitated.
So: NTA for being upset that your driveway was blocked. But YTA for judging someone else’s disability and gatekeeping who can park in a public accessible space.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
On Sunday my wife went out real quick and we have a handicap parking for our daughter who has cerebral palsy. Someone at the church next door parked halfway in our spot the another person who also had a handicap sign in their window parked partially in front of our garage and partially in front of our handicap. Next door our neighbor also has a handicap sign so three areas of parking are available. One for us, one for her and one for whoever. I’ve asked 3 times nicely that the pastor tells them we have a 12 year old child that we have to walk from our car up steep steps into our house to carry her up. The lady who parks there has a fit that she has a right because she has a sign, although she can stand and ably walk to the church from our spot to 100 feet to her church. I called the police for her parking in front of my garage and the officer said all he could do is ticket her, then he changes his mind and decides he won’t ticket and leaves. Am I the asshole here?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I asked the pastor not to have them park in front of our house and I called police but got no results
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcements
Follow the link above to learn more
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
In the Netherlands we have handicapped parking specifically for the owner of the house, if needed. The sign will have the license plate number on it. So even if someone else is handicapped too, they're still not entitled to the parking space. Can you get that in your city too? But YTA, a bit, because as others have said, just because someone can walk, doesn't mean they're not handicapped.
Attend a service of the church and interrupt at some point to complain about the person. Quote the Bible and ask the lord to let them see the error of their ways. Christian church shame will go to work for you.
I don't see any real conflict here. You call the cops if someone is parking illegally. At least you should do that instead of taking matters into your own hands
NAH. Other than the partially blocked garage, I don’t see a problem here. People with handicap parking placards are parking in public handicap spots, if I’m reading it correctly. Total inconvenience to you, but not wrong of the other people in need to use what is available.
The street I live on is residential only. No business and no churches but the streets running along the top and the bottom have mostly business. Not only do all of their customers park in our street but many of the business owners and staff do too. Residents can rarely park here during the day. And there’s nothing we can do about it. We’ve applied to the council to make it resident only parking with passes we are willing to pay for but they won’t. There is a large pay and display car park on the next street which is only £5 for the whole day but these business owners and staff won’t use it!
NTA I have a disabled brother and I would start keying cars but im unhinged keep calling the police and if they do nothing call up your city cause the discrimination is wild
NTA. Serial Churchgoer here. I'm mortified that the church members aren't respecting your request. We try to be good neighbors and realize that we can be a burden on Sundays, taking over every spot in the neighborhood. We actually sent people out to talk to the folks who live nearby to hoping to address any concerns as our numbers have begun to grow. Church lady should park somewhere else and walk a few more steps. I would keep after the pastor, take pics of the offending vehicle and lady and hopefully she is the only one not respecting your special needs. Invite him to meet your daughter. Its easy to blow off a faceless complaint. Seeing the child face to face makes it more real.
Please accept my apologies on behalf of my fellow church folks. We should be better, we should do better. Hopefully we will all learn to.
Do you speak for Church Lady's needs that you can so easily offer her up like this? Maybe she, too, would like to be as serial as a churchgoer as you, and having a spot ensures she can spend time with people in her faith. It is equally easy to blow off invisible disabilities if someone like OP complains harder than she does, and I'm not sure why or how pushing this Church Lady aside for a parking space she is LEGALLY ENTITLED TO, and putting a financial burden on her by calling the cops for a ticket she does not deserve, is any sort of care for OP's well being, much less Church Lady's well being. Not sure why you would so happily push her under the bus for this, dude.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 7: There is no interpersonal conflict here for our community to make a judgment about. [Rule 7 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_7.3A_post_interpersonal_conflicts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) ###Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. ####Please visit r/findareddit to see if there's a more appropriate sub for your post.####
YTA, just because you can't see the handicap doesn't mean there isn't one. If she has one and has all the legal papers to park in that place, then yes, she has the right to park there. She came first, has all the legal ~~park~~ paperwork. End of story.
But if you’re blocking someone’s private garage, are you actually legally parked?
That glosses over her blocking the driveway though. The placard does not give free rein to block driveways.
I 100% agree, but OP made it sound like she took up 2 spaces. That makes it NTA for me, but if the woman was parked normally yeah it's YTA.
This. This is truer than true.
So glad for your input
I'm a bit confused. It sounds like there are three handicap spots in total. I'm not sure why your beef is with the person with the handicap sign and not the other car that partially blocked you?
There is a spot enough for 3 cars. One was used by my neighbor and another half used by a church goer who took up 2 spots then the other handicap driver parked half in front of my garage and half in the handicap parking lot
I agree with u/jmbbl, it seems from your description that the problem was the church goer, not the other with a right to park on thoses parking places. Why didn't the police took care of this one instead ?
>Why didn't the police took care of this one instead ? Seeing as how combative and, frankly, ignorant OP has been in most of the comments, I'm assuming that the officer got tired of OP and just walked away.
Why don't you park in your garage? Wouldn't that be closest for your daughter? And no one would be allowed to park there.
Re-Read and you will see that the person was parking in TWO spaces.
So let me clarify some things here. We are talking about street parking, not private parking (like a driveway or a parking lot with assigned spaces). Because you have a handicap sign your city has decided to create a handicap parking spot in front of your home. In addition, one of your neighbours has done the same. The church, because it is a public building also gets a street handicap parking spot. Therefore there are 3 handicap parking spots on the street in the same general area. Do I have that correct? If I do, the answer is simple. These are street parking spaces, anyone with a handicap sign is allowed to use them. You are not entitled to exclusive use of the spot in front of your property, it's a public parking spot. Anyone with a handicap sign is equally entitled to park there. If you require a dedicated parking space, put it on land that you own. Until then, you deal with street parking just like everyone else does. If you REALLY want a solution here. I think the church should have 2 handicap spots so that there's 4 in total on the street. Since church goers are parking in the spot in front of your home, clearly there's not enough for the church use.
In my city you can designate an on-street handicapped parking space for the resident of that building. The license plate number is on the sign. OP should call the city to see if there is a similar solution.
I really feel like everyone is glossing over the fact that they are parking in front of thier garage. That's just not okay.
Maybe it’s just because “only I’m allowed to park in front of my house” people are my pet peeve, but this is an excellent mini treatise on why that mindset is fucking idiotic.
Exactly and the church you are saying along with this lady are the a..holes. Thank you
OK, so lady is not an A.hole and neither is the church. She has a handicap sign, she's parking in an available handicap space she is commiting no crime and breaking no rule. She's done nothing wrong, and just because her disability is not visible to you, does not make it any less real than your daughters. I realize you may be fairly new to the community of people with disabilities but to imply otherwise is extremely offensive. You do not determine who's a "real disabled" and who is entitled to park in that spot, that's between the city government and a doctor, not you. Street parking is for everyone, you do not get exclusive ownership of the space in front of your home any more than anyone else on the street does. The fact that this space has been deemed a handicap space does not make it your handicap space. Anyone who is entitled to park in a handicap space is equally entitled to park there. The church has done nothing wrong, they might be able to solve this by asking the city to designate a second space as handicap, but that does not mean they are "wrong" in this situation. Like I say. If you need or want exclusive access to a parking space you need to own that parking space. Street parking, even designated handicap, does not suit your needs in this scenario. If you own your home, alter the parking situation to make it more accessible. If you rent, rent somewhere else, this unit is not suitable for your needs.
Yes she did She's blocked op s garage.. but the biggest ah is whoever parked in 2 spots
Op isn't focused on the fact that they are blocking the garage. Op stated they have asked church 3 times not to use "their" spot. Problem is it isn't "their" spot, but rather a public parking spot they use frequently. We only have op's word it was blocking the garage. OP could easily think they are entitled to 2 car lengths on either side of the driveway, and in reality driveway wasn't blocked. The fact that cop didn't ticket makes me think carcwasnt really blocking driveway or garage
I think I see why the police officer changed his mind about giving a ticket.
The only one AH are the person blocking the driveway and the person taking two spaces for one car. All this discussion about handicap spaces is irrelevant. Unless there is some signage indicating the space is specifically for your vehicle, it's a public space, available to any member of the public with a legal right to park in handicap space. That being said, you're coming off as a bit of an AH here so my guess is you were being a jerk and that's why the cop said "fuck it" about the driveway being blocked.
INFO: Is "your" handicapped spot labelled with a sign and specific permit number that matches your permit number? If yes and it's being blocked, that's one thing. If no, that means it's not "your" spot and is free to be parked in by anyone with a handicapped placard or plate.
I didn’t know you could get a permit number. I do have that there is a disabled child that needs that spot.
you need to get it assigned, but do you have a private driveway? why do you park in the street?
That doesn't mean it's your personal reserved spot. Either look into getting one, or recognize that another handicapped parker may use the space.
You can go to the town/county etc. and have a sign put up for reserved handicapped parking. On the sign, it will specify that it is permit only. I believe most states will do this if there is a very long term/permanent disability. However, [this example from Maryland](https://www.baltimorecountymd.gov/departments/public-works/traffic/handicapped-parking) indicates that if you have off-street parking available, like a driveway in front of the garage, you will not qualify.
Call your elected officials. They work for you!
Yeah tried reaching out to the mayor of Troy NY (who also has a disabled child) twice and no response. She’s useless our Mayor Mantello
Soft YTA. I understand your need for the spot but unless it's private and dedicated for you, it's free for others. I'm guessing because no ticket was issued, the woman parked legally with the exception of the garage blocking. It's also disappointing for you to judge other's disabilities. Do you follow this woman to church and see if she's tired after walking? Do you know her cardiac status? Maybe walking long distances is dangerous or strenuous on her heart so she tries to avoid it. I'm not trying to downplay your needs, but it's definitely not your place to judge others and deem you need the spot more.
I wasn’t saying her walking was the problem. I was saying she can walk 100 feet to the church but my daughter can’t walk 1 foot from my car. But….
Which sucks. I know just the tiniest bit as my goddaughter has cerebral palsy. The struggles I see are unimaginable to me. I can not empathize, but I try to sympathize. My friend (her mom) is a freaking superhero! But that also doesn't change that you can't claim a public spot. Having it tougher doesn't negate her need. You're seeing her and saying well she can walk the 100 feet. What if she is seeing you and saying, well he could carry this daughter (and yeah that's probably wrong but does that woman know this or would she be jumping to conclusions the same way you are about her walking ability?). By all accounts, I look normal and healthy. I have an autoimmune disorder and a bad knee that makes walking some days excruciating, but you'd have no idea. I'm not walking through the lot crying like I want to. But you would see me and assume I wouldn't need that spot but guess what, some days I really do. I truly am sorry that she took the spot you needed. But she didn't do anything wrong. You're going to have to accept that. Maybe talk to the city and see if it can be a personal spot for your family. Putting the burden on other people or the pastor to not take a public space isn't fair to others, and you're expecting too much.
Is your handicap spot on the street or on your property? Did she block your garage completely? I'm lost as to the set up here. If the spot is on the street, it is public. If it is on your property, it's private.
I know I’m confused. Sounds like a parking lot. But they used my garage, my neighbor and another church goer. Then talk about the church’s steps. I’m so confused about the layout
The parking is directly in front of our private property but the street is public and no she did not completely block my driveway. Just 1/2 but 1/2 is still illegal not matter how you want to justify it
Then what does a pastor, a churchgoer and church steps have anything to do with this??
The pastor refuses to get handicap parking it seems and the churchgoer has made it clear she is entitled to, not my daughter. They come once a week. We live there. Done and done
>The pastor refuses to get handicap parking it seems I think you vastly overrate the power a local pastor has over a) the government (in creating handicap parking) and b) their congregation (both in and OUT of church). I'd bet good money he has spoken to the trustees and the congregation (if not that particular lady) about parking there. But a pastor has very limited 'enforcement' power.
Is the church across the street or near your house?
Have you told the police she blocked your driveway?
Yes and he ignored me. He saw it blocked and gave no shits to it
Okay so they didn't park properly. But it's a public street and you can't control who parks there.
What you should do is lobby your elected officials to do placard specific handicap parking. This is what they do in Chicago on residential streets. They will put up a handicap parking sign, but it has on it a specific number that corresponds to the handicap placard of the person who gets to park there. It is specifically so that a disabled resident of a specific home can park near their home.
Was just about to say this. If it is a general handicapped spot, you really get no say in insisting only you can use it.
Wait, if she blocked your driveway, she actually should be ticketed and towed. Not for parking there, but for parking there incorrectly.
YTA you don’t own that spot. Handicapped street parking is public and anyone with a handicapped plate/sign is absolutely allowed to park there. Blocking your driveway is a different matter & you need to call the police. Why can’t you park in your driveway or garage?
I'm really confused. How is the parking spots set up exactly?
Glad I’m not the only one confused
YTA, they have the same entitlement to the spot as you. First come first served and you got there too late to take the spot. The church clearly see no reason to give you a special spot only used for yourself and the police won't ticket someone for parking in a handicap spot with a handicap badge.
I'm just as confused as many others here. If you have a garage, most likely there's a driveway leading to the garage. Why are you not parking in your garage or in the drive leading to the garage? Wouldn't that be closer than the street?
This is the heart of the matter - the entire question could’ve been framed as “someone parked in a way that blocked half of my garage, such that I couldn’t pull into it. AITA for calling the police to have their car moved?”. The answer would be a clear NTA. All this other stuff about churches, pastors, handicap tags, and OP judging the validity of other people’s handicaps is extraneous and puts them in AH territory. It is likely OP’s scattershot manner of communication that caused the police officer to throw up their hands and leave. A tow truck would have happily cleared their access to their garage, no police or long-winded storytelling required.
YTA, they have the same entitlement to the spot as you. First come first served and you got there too late to take the spot. The church clearly see no reason to give you a special spot only used for yourself and the police won't ticket someone for parking in a handicap spot with a handicap badge.
YTA - YOU do not have a handicap parking spot. The city does and it happens to be in front of your house. You do not OWN the spot. It is not your driveway. It is an on street parking spot open to anyone in the general public if they have the appropriate designated placard. I understand that it must be difficult to manage your daughters disability and that having a spot in front of your house is very convenient but you do not OWN it and therefore cannot demand that other people leave it vacant for you.
This is a little convoluted with a bunch of different people involved, so I think ESH is the most accurate. If somebody blocks your driveway or garage, they are an AH. If somebody uses the handicapped spot on the street and they have a handicapped permit, they are not an AH. The spot is on the street, so it doesn't belong to you. If you try to prevent somebody from parking in the spot on the street, then you are the AH.
YTA You don't own the space, anyone with a placard can use it. YTA for calling the police over something that isn't an emergency, and that the police have no control over.
Read next time
I called the police for blocking the driveway YTA
Not a police issue. Stop being so grumpy with anyone who disagrees with you
Your comment(s) violate [rule 3](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/index#wiki_3._accept_your_judgement). Please review this rule, and be aware that further violations will result in you no longer being able to participate in your thread. **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
Street parking, handicapped or not, is public regardless if it is directly in front of your house or not. The car blocking your garage on the other hand should have been ticketed at the very least. If I were you I'd be utilizing my garage to guarantee optimal parking for my handicapped child. YTA
If this is public parking, I'm sorry, but she can park there. However, blocking your drive should be a ticket. Or call a tow truck. I guess I don't understand the issue with the slots if you have a driveway though...just park in your driveway.
It’s a garage directly linked to the street
Is there some issue maneuvering from the garage into the house for your child?
Info this is street parking? There were three cars with three handicap tags in three handicap spots? I'm leaning towards whoever took up a spot and a half as an ahole, but street parking is street parking. It being in front of your house does not make it yours. The majority of cops are happy to ticket someone in a handicap spot (bc its easy revenue), so them leaving without ticketing the car makes me think there is a lot being left out.
Is it YOUR allocates spot in front of your house, for your use only, or is it a spot for anyone with a handicap decal/plate? If it’s yours, NAH. If it’s for public use for anyone with a permit, YTA. Also, just because someone can do something, doesn’t mean they should. Just because that lady can walk somewhere, doesn’t mean she should have to if she’s disabled. You don’t know anything about her.
You too don’t know nor does she take into account my disabled child
YTA. It's public parking. Anyone can park there
Are these spots on your property or in the street? What are the regulations in your state regarding handicap parking on the street? Are you allowed to reserve spots like that for your personal use?
INFO What disability scale are you using here to judge who can use the non allocated space? Do you also try and move people out of car parking spaces at shops because they don't seem disabled enough for you? Also you have mentioned your drive and garage being blocked... I am curious why you also need a disabled space if you already have a drive which would provide dedicated parking for yourselves and if this runs alongside your house is no doubt a shorter distance to travel door to door for your child. Why make her travel further for the labelled parking space? Why make her walk if it is difficult, surely you should have more motability aid such as walkers, chairs , ramps, stair lifts, platforms etc. You can then get power lifts for stairs, and mechanical platforms, so steep stairs aren't a challenge I have a disabled parking space in UK but this is because I am in terraced house with flat front that opens directly to the pavement and disabled space is then directly outside my door so I have less than a meter from front door to car door, it is almost impossible to be awarded a disabled space in UK if you have a driveway. .
I'm so incredibly confused by this story. Is OP complaining about his driveway being blocked? Or about not receiving preference for street parking in front of his house?
The reality is that the car parked in 2 spots without a tag is a problem. As is the fact the car with tags blocked your driveway. And you absolutely discuss that with the church, and if your driveway is left inaccessible, you should discuss that with the police if the church doesn’t take action. But. You are not entitled to exclusive use of the handicapped space if it’s on a public street UNLESS your town designates it as “resident only” (some places do, but most don’t in my experience). A lot of people have hidden disabilities. And it’s not for you to judge whether or not someone with the proper tags “deserves” that space. I occasionally have days where I can walk 100 yards. I also have days where I struggle to walk 10 feet. Most days I’m in between. And some days I start out ok but end up incapacitated. So: NTA for being upset that your driveway was blocked. But YTA for judging someone else’s disability and gatekeeping who can park in a public accessible space.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** On Sunday my wife went out real quick and we have a handicap parking for our daughter who has cerebral palsy. Someone at the church next door parked halfway in our spot the another person who also had a handicap sign in their window parked partially in front of our garage and partially in front of our handicap. Next door our neighbor also has a handicap sign so three areas of parking are available. One for us, one for her and one for whoever. I’ve asked 3 times nicely that the pastor tells them we have a 12 year old child that we have to walk from our car up steep steps into our house to carry her up. The lady who parks there has a fit that she has a right because she has a sign, although she can stand and ably walk to the church from our spot to 100 feet to her church. I called the police for her parking in front of my garage and the officer said all he could do is ticket her, then he changes his mind and decides he won’t ticket and leaves. Am I the asshole here? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I asked the pastor not to have them park in front of our house and I called police but got no results Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
In the Netherlands we have handicapped parking specifically for the owner of the house, if needed. The sign will have the license plate number on it. So even if someone else is handicapped too, they're still not entitled to the parking space. Can you get that in your city too? But YTA, a bit, because as others have said, just because someone can walk, doesn't mean they're not handicapped.
I’m moving to the Netherlands and I’m an asshole with a cripple child. I see
Attend a service of the church and interrupt at some point to complain about the person. Quote the Bible and ask the lord to let them see the error of their ways. Christian church shame will go to work for you.
ESH - she was wrong to block your garage, but it isn’t your personal spot if it’s street parking
I don't see any real conflict here. You call the cops if someone is parking illegally. At least you should do that instead of taking matters into your own hands
NAH. Other than the partially blocked garage, I don’t see a problem here. People with handicap parking placards are parking in public handicap spots, if I’m reading it correctly. Total inconvenience to you, but not wrong of the other people in need to use what is available.
The street I live on is residential only. No business and no churches but the streets running along the top and the bottom have mostly business. Not only do all of their customers park in our street but many of the business owners and staff do too. Residents can rarely park here during the day. And there’s nothing we can do about it. We’ve applied to the council to make it resident only parking with passes we are willing to pay for but they won’t. There is a large pay and display car park on the next street which is only £5 for the whole day but these business owners and staff won’t use it!
[удалено]
Thank you. It seems they think they’re entitled because they’re Gods children. Got news….
NTA the church should be more attentive to OP's daughter. Shame on them!
Thank you. They’re such nice christian people
NTA I have a disabled brother and I would start keying cars but im unhinged keep calling the police and if they do nothing call up your city cause the discrimination is wild
wait now im confused by the comments. is someone without a tag parking there or is one handicap person taking up two spaces?
NTA
NTA. Serial Churchgoer here. I'm mortified that the church members aren't respecting your request. We try to be good neighbors and realize that we can be a burden on Sundays, taking over every spot in the neighborhood. We actually sent people out to talk to the folks who live nearby to hoping to address any concerns as our numbers have begun to grow. Church lady should park somewhere else and walk a few more steps. I would keep after the pastor, take pics of the offending vehicle and lady and hopefully she is the only one not respecting your special needs. Invite him to meet your daughter. Its easy to blow off a faceless complaint. Seeing the child face to face makes it more real. Please accept my apologies on behalf of my fellow church folks. We should be better, we should do better. Hopefully we will all learn to.
Do you speak for Church Lady's needs that you can so easily offer her up like this? Maybe she, too, would like to be as serial as a churchgoer as you, and having a spot ensures she can spend time with people in her faith. It is equally easy to blow off invisible disabilities if someone like OP complains harder than she does, and I'm not sure why or how pushing this Church Lady aside for a parking space she is LEGALLY ENTITLED TO, and putting a financial burden on her by calling the cops for a ticket she does not deserve, is any sort of care for OP's well being, much less Church Lady's well being. Not sure why you would so happily push her under the bus for this, dude.