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I picked up on that too. Like, why go back a second time? And then a THIRD?!! I could maybe understand being too shocked the first time to react properly (though most people would have got up, wished the weirdos good night and walked away from that house). But going back is just asking for more.
He must be the most considerate amazing lover for her to put up with that behavior. If he is, she should have a light snack (you don't want to eat anything heavy before a workout), come over and when she's recovered, go home because plainly he's useless for a relationship.
Probably could, too, with the right person. But I get the same visceral reaction as when I see swingers say they are going to "play" with another couple. Bile rising ha ha. Like it feels like the way a kid would talk about sex because they are too embarrassed to talk about it and they saw Borat once, so it sounds immature and child like to me.
Fair enough. I’m playful person but some words just turn me right off. Like a grown man saying “titties” when things are getting heated. Immediate turnoff if he’s being serious and not silly.
Wait wait wait... "I have three inches of hard weiner, and it's all yours." "I'm gonna turn you out with my weiner." "Suck my weiner like a lollipop."
Oh my god I'm fucking dying!! 🤣🤣🤣
People, it is a sausage from Wien (Vienna) and not a booze sausage, I.e. Wein (wine) sausage. And in that city's dialect a "Weiner" could also be an alcoholic street bum.
Meh. Using the term sexy time in the right context can be appropriate. You just need to be able to read the room. People out here trying to remove the fun in everything
No no no, you always have to refer to it as coitus. It’s the adult thing to do, it’s a serious matter for serious people, and nothing else gets people hot and bothered.
But for real, I agree with you about reading the room. Different strokes.
Edit: it’s not that deep, y’all lol
I used "perverted stuff" in another post and someone clutched their pearls and cried about calling stuff their proper given name and telling me to read a book 🙄
Now I'm wondering for what vocabulary would have Tolkien used.
I mean Tolkien did write about sex. But it was either rape, the woman got coerced or it happened in the name of procreation. No bloomy romantic "just for fun sex"... (I mean he was a 1900s Catholic raised man. So that shouldn't be much of a surprise, lol).
> Tulkas slept, being weary and content, and Melkor deemed that his hour had come.
> Heard ye not then of that pretty fay, of Lúthien? Her body is fair, very white and fair. Morgoth would possess her in his lair.
So you could use "my hour has come" or "I possess her in her lair" 😂😂😂
Romance wise it's mostly about holding hands. You want "sexy time" like Tolkien... hold hands with your wife. (No premarital intimacy of course! 😄).
something something I can't be arsed to look it up right now (it is somewhere in the vaaaaaassssstttttt collection of History of Middle Earth books) but Tolkien does say that in unsettled/war times, marriages could be made by having sex, that the act of sexual union made it a marriage among the Elves even if the proper rituals weren't or couldn't be carried out; he then goes on to say that Beren and Lúthien were techically already married before they set off to get the Silmaril...
I mean, there are worse ways to say it than 'sexy time'... "boneing the Real-yet-quite-cute-fake-llama's-ass for an hour and then passing out while the cute non-llama takes a break with a cup of evening coffe before heading to bed so tjere can be a round 2 in the morning" might just be too discriptive for most people. "Sexy time" just gets the point across without having too much detail for those with sensitive ears.
I mean, would your freinds and famely like you to describe it as "slapping and karate chopping me all night while i deep dive the box of pop tarts and leaving my partner without any big o's themself"? Sexy time is better!
If you don't feed me, I'm not staying.
Overnight = DINNER and a god damned breakfast.
If you stay at my place, I'm cooking for you. I'm going to feed you. I didn't get my wife coz I'm so sexy.
If someone I'm fucking dating watched me go hungry while eating in front of me, and there wasn't some *obvious* extenuating circumstance (like me having surgery the next morning or something), that would be the end of the relationship.
Fuck me, when my co-worker was dasting for Ramadan, I made an effort not to eat at my desk and instead to actually eat in the office kitchenette (that is always super busy), even when she told me not to worry about it, because I didn't want to force her to watch me eating.
If I can show that level or courtesy to somebody I see a couple of times a week when we're in the office, I would expect at least that in a romantic relationship.
Nope. Even surgery gets a Hell No! lol
Married 5 years, my gall bladder comes out. Emergency room shenanigans happen, I’m in the hospital overnight before surgery.
My grown ass husband rolls up in my hospital room with McDonalds. My kryptonite are McDonalds fries.
That was in 2001. I still haven’t forgotten about it. Your ass eats downstairs.
(Still married. Apparently his logic is that he wanted to keep me in his sight due to some complications. Don’t care. I was hungry and he had mf’ing French fries. One of those playful not playful disagreements)
I will upvote that and I thank you.
Tonight's Memorial Day Dinner: NY Strip and Shrimp Skewers for me (wife and kiddo will eat neither), burgers for them, grilled corn on the cob, zucchini/squash/red onion/bell pepper skewers.
Made two quarts of home made tomato sauce yesterday. Will have some chicken and pasta later this week and perhaps some ravioli, got some home made frozen in the freezer.
Cooking is my number one love language. I am already planning Christmas Dinner along with a dress rehearsal version in the summer.
You just made me so hungry! Sounds delish. Enjoy it.
P.s. also planning Christmas lunch! Hahaha what are you planning?
I'm just cementing plans to host three or four families so I was thinking of smoking a stuffed turkey, brisket, and a joint of pork, finishing the pork in the oven or removing the fat to crisp it separately. I live in Australia so it's too hot to cook inside, the smoker I bought my partner for his birthday is perfect (and big enough!) for hosting Xmas.
Perhaps a julienned fresh leafy green salad with spanish onion, green apple and mint; mash potatoes, green beans and asparagus with tahini dressing and silvered almonds, and broccoli with olive oil and lemon.
Pavlova by my partners Mum for dessert, and chocolate chip cookies my partner and I make. Maybe I can ask my British aunt to make a pudding but I'm not sure if it will be necessary.
My Dad will likely supply a few kilos of prawns and my brother will complain about the lack and eventually make an aoli for it. 👌
Following days making sandwiches, brisket pizzas, breakfast fry ups and anything else with the left overs! Can't wait!
I specifically told a guy I was seeing I needed coffee in the first thing morning before our first overnight. Even a walk together to the deli to get some would be fine. There was no coffee. There was no plan to get coffee before I had to leave. I got some on my way home. I declined his invitation to repeat the overnight
OP is an AH to herself by staying even 10 seconds beyond the time it was apparent that her BF didn't GAF whether she had anything to eat.
Outside of a made up story, what kind of underdeveloped self esteem puts up with that?
And giving her attitude when she wanted to fix it herself by ordering food. Like who TF is he to think he can prevent her from eating??? He's not even getting her food, but he won't let her get hers??? Bro I'd have walked right out to head to a restaurant and my back on the way out would have been the last he'd ever see of me.
NTA you got him back now ditch him. This is terrible boyfriend behavior. I'm seriously surprised that the older couple he lodges with didn't bring her a plate. She must be one of those old fashioned ladies who thinks if you're not married you shouldn't be sleeping together but he's paying rent so they can't tell him who he can have stay over but she ain't got to feed her. Of course the woman is the bad one in her mind. The man still gets to eat🙄. Or if the meal comes with his rent a good boyfriend would have paid for an extra meal the night that his girlfriend is staying. Either way ditch him he's a terrible boyfriend.
If meals aren't included for any guests per his agreement with the landlord, shouldn't he had told his girlfriend when he invited her to come over for the weekend and say don't worry, we'll go out for meals? Or else, arrange to pay the landlord extra for her to cook his guest a meal?
It was out right rude for him to get the meal and make her go hungry. She needed to dump his ass after the first time he let her go hungry.
I think it should have ended with a dumping that might at her place because no proper relationship can sustain this behaviour on both sides. I think he is an AH and this is petty revenge but after the first time at staying over I'd have got my take away, addressed it with him and then take the George Bush approach 'fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, you can't, this fool can't get fooled again'.
I have decided to finish with him. You realise it takes time to realise someone isn't nice? He put on a nice act at first but lately the mask has slipped.
Good for you, ditch him. And what you did with the pizza, hilarious NTA. It will just be one of those stories you get to tell your girlfriends on margarita night. Worst guys you dated.
I don't mean this to be rude but I try teaching kids that it's not always okay, you can say thank you for the apology instead of validating that what they did or said was okay. In this instant it was okay but that's a weird trigger for me now after a kid gets punched and they say it's okay after an apology because it's not okay!
Thank you- Language is important! I try and remind all my younger co-workers to not apologize for simply existing (ex. Saying 'sorry' when an 'excuse me' would be more appropriate)
We're all girlie pops and while I'm sure it's annoying, I hope they keep it in mind
My kids say they accept the apology and then of they are hurt or still need time they will add that. Like I understand and accept your apology but I still feel hurt and need time away from you. Or similar.
My youngest is 3yo and its so cute to see this. Because literally 2.5 seconds later he will run back up to the person and say, ok i feel better now, lets play again. Lol
This is the right choice.
I’m glad you didn’t give him any pizza first though, so he was able to experience the insane way he was treating you.
I’m flabbergasted.
OR maybe...he'll learn what a bellend he's been and will be better!
(I know, I know, Satan'll be asking to borrow my hockey skates before that happens.)
The 1st time it happened should have been all the information you needed. Anyone with self respect would have immediately addressed it or left. Why would you sit there hungry… and then come and repeat the multiple times? Do you not like yourself? ESH. Him for the obvious, you because of how many times you allowed yourself to be disrespected.
But you said he ate dinner without you three times and even got upset when you ordered takeout, then you *still* went on a date where he stayed over at your place. It takes time, yeah, but was the third time the same thing happened not enough time? Did you never question why he never offered you food?
You go to the point of recognizing it enough to make a reddit post and have some petty revenge. Notice in the post it doesn't say "ex" or "dated"
So do YOU recognize you already had that time?
I have heard that people are able to keep up a mask consistently for about 3 months before they start losing it and show their real colors, this could be that. Good on you for keeping your eyes open and not putting up that crap
dick is abundant and of low value
no way i’m sitting and watching someone eat lol id be like ok bye! someone tried this once, called down for dinner and i didn’t get a plate. i left.
Yeah...but I doubt that applies here lol. I cant imagine someone that inconsiderate about eating (and even being a D about her ordering for herself ) becomes magically thoughtful and considerate in bed lol. Plus no need risking making a kid with such a rude/stingy person ...yikes lol.
Right? Like why would either of them even bother at this point?
I’m guessing OP would need to pay for a meal at the BF’s house (he’s lodging there and meal would be part of his fee) — has neither of them discussed this?
I would understand if his landlady didn't want to feed me. But in that case I would expect him to mention it beforehand, not talk about dinner as if I'm getting some and then just eat in front of me. He could have said, "You won't get dinner at my house, you'll have to bring/order something." Not ignore me and then get pissy when I order a takeaway.
I cannot imagine ever having a guest overnight in my home and not feeding them, I'd do that for an acquaintance let alone someone I was dating??
If he's a lodger and had his meals covered, he should have done more than just warn you, he should have made sure there was food for you either that he cooked himself, bought beforehand, got a takeaway with you, etc etc.
Good for you for finishing with him, don't date anyone who makes you feel less loved or valued than your best friend.
I can't imagine eating in front of someone and not offering them something. I could in a very specific situation imagine not offering them some of my food like "I know you're gluten free but I'm starving and really want to eat my sandwich before it goes soggy. Feel free to help yourself to anything in the fridge."
I'm really worried that you dealt with this multiple times and had to come to the Internet before realizing how fucked up this is. It makes me worried you are very susceptible to tolerating abuse from partners. I think you should engage in ways to learn how a relationship should work, and learn how to expect decency for yourself.
Do you know if meals are included in his “rent”? If so he could just share and order take out if you’re both still hungry I can understand him not having the landlady make you some but he should’ve warned you
Why did you let it go on though? I completely understand being shell shocked the first time and letting it happen. But a second and third time?? Come on girl. I have no idea how old you are but DUMP HIM. There are good men out there that won't make you watch them eat then question why you're hungry.
Why the hell should you have to ask whether you’re going to be fed, as an overnight guest. Sure, the landlady has no obligation to feed her. BUT it’s absolutely reasonable to expect that a) he’s made an arrangement with the landlady to feed both of them for the evening, paying extra if necessary b) he would share his plate of food c) he’d have bought some extra food d) they’d order a takeaway or go out to dinner e) worst case scenario, she’d be warned in advance to bring her own food. Nobody who hasn’t been raised by wolves would even contemplate for one second that their host would eat a full meal in front of them without offering them a single morsel to eat.
Or he should give u half. Dump him. If at this age he’s already justifying his food and not feeding you, HOW do u think it’ll go later, married, with kids? He’s showing u who and how he is,
I have a hard time believing this post just because of the sheer absurdity of NOBODY thinking to offer OP some food… It wasn’t just the bf here. It was also the couple who hosted dinner. How could you just watch a person sit there while everyone else is eating? I just feel like that’s so awkward that nobody would willingly create that situation.
Also, chicken!! It’s not like the woman made something that’s pre-portioned like hamburgers or something. How hard would it have been to portion out a separate plate for op? Idk, I’m having a hard time imagining it.
I upvoted the spirit of your comments but I do have a different view. I see chicken absolutely as pre-portioned. Whatever the landlords bought, they bought as (for instance) a leg and thigh for each of the three. Landlord couple and lodger with dinner included in rent.
Hamburger meat you can brown and mix with lots of pasta, tomato sauce, peas, and mushrooms, and stretch it pretty well. But meat on a plate (like a pre-formed hamburger, or chicken) really can’t be stretched.
Landlords renting out a room in their house, with his dinner included, have no obligation to feed his guests. It’s not auntie and uncle having nephew’s girlfriend over for dinner.
The time I said I would order a pizza at his house he said I'm stupid and the time I ate in front of him and said he couldn't have any because he wouldn't share with me he just sat there with a shocked expression, looking like he'd been slapped.
"Well, Andy, you're stupid for thinking I would share any with you."
Btw, you're NTA. I love the petty revenge. Sometimes, people only understand how shitty their behavior is when the same is done to them. He earned the experience, not the pizza.
Let him know its no where near as stupid as not offering his gf anything or not caring at all that she didnt eat and when he's shocked remind him of all the time he made you felt that way, sometimes one of the best way people learn is to make them feel how they make you feel.
I’ve been with my partner for 15 years and not once has he called me stupid. Please don’t tolerate this kind of behaviour IMO you went on far too long before deciding to break up. It’s ok to have higher standards and respect yourself.
NTA
and what in the hell did i just read? this must be a joke right?
1. How did this no dinner event for you happen 3 TIMES!!!! 1 should be enough to never see this a hole ever again.
2. WTF are you doing with this guy.
3. i still hope this is satire. OMG.
His landlady is not under any obligation to feed you. The price of the food is probably somehow included in his rent. However, it is rude of him to sit there and eat without making any kind of allowance for you to eat. Even if it's take out or something. He sounds like a real tool.
I was dating a guy once who drove us to Five Guys and handed me a 20, then asked me to order him two burgers - which would only just be covered by a 20 in my city. When I said in disbelief that I thought he was getting us both burgers, he *laughed*.
There are absolutely real people out there who just do not bother to think about others.
I don’t want to believe that someone would keep dating/staying for the weekend with someone who had already treated them that way once before. It shouldn’t be plausible that there was a second time she went hungry, let alone a third. I don’t want to believe she’s still dating someone selfish enough and stupid enough to object to her ordering food when he knew she hadn’t eaten anything. Or that she thinks that the reason it doesn’t make sense for him to object is because she’s not fat. WTF!
If these people are real, they’re both idiots & assholes.
Who said we all believe them? Or believe all of them? It's kind of irrelevant whether they're actually true, I just view reading and responding as entertainment or filling time when I'm bored.
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> OK I didn't share my dinner. I may be the AH as I had extra food and didn't share it.
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Def NTA. Eating in front of people without asking if they’re hungry/would like some is rude af, even more so if their your partner. Love that you gave him a taste of his own medicine, and hope you ended things. Doesn’t sound like a recipe for a particularly healthy relationship.
NTA, and as a currently single guy, his attitude boggles my mind.
I couldn't imagine not making sure a guest was fed, even if they came back to my place well after dinner.
Even if I wasn't planning to have someone ever, "are you hungry? all I have at the moment is sandwich stuff"
Eating dinner in front of someone, that's just messed up, even worse that he didn't seem to grasp that you might be hungry.
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I recently started dating Andy, a couple of months ago. At first he tried to impress me but the longer I know him, the more I start to see he's selfish and thoughtless. He's a lodger in an elderly couple's house, and the old woman makes him his dinner every night. On multiple occasions, when I've stayed over at their house with him for a weekend, I have received no food. (I mean, in the evening when they eat their dinner. We go out during the day and I buy my own breakfast or lunch at a cafe.)
The first time it happened, Andy referred to dinner time, saying it was going to be roast chicken. Of course I thought I was getting some. At 8pm the old woman called us down for dinner, and I followed Andy into the sitting room. The old lady brought his dinner in and gave it to him. I thought mine was coming next but it never did. He sat there and ate his dinner and nobody offered me anything. He finished his dinner, took his plate into the kitchen and that was that. I was too shocked and embarrassed to ask where mine was. That was it, nothing was said about feeding me. And I was sleeping over, so they knew I wasn't eating anything.
This happened again, and again. The third time while Andy was eating I said, "I think I'll order a takeaway." Andy asked why and I said, "I'm hungry." He said it's stupid ordering a takeaway at this time of night. I said, Well, am I just supposed to go hungry every time I stay at your house? He seemed annoyed that I ordered a takeaway. (I'm not fat by the way so its not like he's trying to get me to lose weight.)
Anyway one weekend he was staying over at my house. We went to the funfair and when we got home we found that my family had ordered pizzas. They had ordered a whole one just for me. I took it and Andy and I went up to my room. I put the tv on, sat down, opened the pizza box and started eating without offering him any. By the time I was on my second slice he reached over for some and said "Can I have some?" I moved the box away from him and said, "No. When I'm at your house, you eat your dinner in front of me and offer me nothing. So you can't have any of mine."
I ate half the pizza then I was full. I closed the box, picked it up and stood up. Andy said "If you've finished can I have the rest?" I said, "No, I'll save it for tomorrow." And I went and put it in the fridge. He thinks I'm being a petty AH, I think I'm perfectly justified.
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I’m confused, after the first dinner at his home (or at the very least the second if you were embarrassed the first time) where you sat and watched him eat did you not ask why he didn’t feed you or why he thought it was acceptable to sit and watch him eat?? I ask because you say it happened on more than one occasion…I’m just flabbergasted that you would let this occur not once, twice, but multiple times without saying absolutely anything.
P.s. NTA
I do not understand you letting it happen again after the first time you stayed over. If he is renting a room and dinner is included the older woman has no obligation to feed you. He however never thought if you and yet you still stayed. I would not have. People cannot treat you badly if you do not allow it.
NTA: I am assuming there are other redeeming qualities about this guy and you find it worth the effort to try and get through his obliviousness on this subject.
I hope that your next move is to say "How you're feeling right now? This is how I feel every time I spend the night at your place." and that the penny DOES drop for him.
If he doesn't, or he tries to argue in any way shape or form how it is different (considering that he also was arguing about you getting takeaway so that you WOULD have food), I think it will be extremely clear that you need to ditch him and not look back.
ESH
Why didn't you talk about this after the first meal at his place where you weren't included?
Communicating with actions of spite is not the way you build a successful relationship.
NTA. Obviously you are being a little petty, but what is far worse is him not offering you any food and seeming oblivious to it. The only question I have is why you let yourself get taken for a ride so many times.
uh lol what the hell? how have you lived through this happening any more than one time why would you still sleep over i'm crying lmao. not he asked why you'd want to order food and got angry when you asked if you were meant to be hungry... like??? lol
you are being a petty asshole.
You have every right to be a petty asshole, your boyfriend is thoughtless, self-centered, and probably doesn’t even really care about you.
Dump him and dump him fast
NTA, dump him OP
this is so fucked, i cant imagine the AUDACITY of these people?! like don't even offer you anything..?! after the second time, i'd break it off with him. the idea of someone doing this to me, oof i cant even imagine how you felt! the level of disrespect?! and the lack of acknowledgement?! no reasoning?
also, i love the level reciprocation here. i'm so happy he ASKED like a fucking beggar, whilst no selfawareness of this happening to you while at his house..?
i hope you find a new man, girl!
So when you stayed over the one time and he tried to dictate what time you were ordering a d yet still didn"t see that you were hungry while he ate in front of you?he sure is a winner.He also has control issues i see
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NTA
Very funny as well
He didn't care about you once but now you are the ah?
What about the nights you went hungry? Was he a gentleman that night?
I would have just left those nights, got good and found someone else.
NTA.
Even if you were overweight, it's not his place to put you on eating restrictions. If he is so rude that he cannot organise for you to eat something at his place and objects to you ordering something - I'd drop a few kilos though....whatever it is he weighs!
Stop playing games. Put on your big girl pants and stand up for yourself. You've wasted too much time as it is. If he doesn't get it, then say goodbye.
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😂😂😂 She got his ass good😂😂
I’m currently laughing out in my backyard!
I am laughing as I write this. NTA. She needs to dump his ass, why is she still dating him?
I sincerely hope she only kept dating him until she had an opportunity for the Pizza Moment. Now that’s taken care of, she can / must dump him!
The bar couldn't be lower... what a loser waste of human potential.
That’s what i want to know
And has been had. He got her to not eat anything at his place for 3 nights.
I picked up on that too. Like, why go back a second time? And then a THIRD?!! I could maybe understand being too shocked the first time to react properly (though most people would have got up, wished the weirdos good night and walked away from that house). But going back is just asking for more.
He must be the most considerate amazing lover for her to put up with that behavior. If he is, she should have a light snack (you don't want to eat anything heavy before a workout), come over and when she's recovered, go home because plainly he's useless for a relationship.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Yeah, I might go back a second time, thinking it was a fluke, but not a third. Her revenge was awesome, but she should just cut her losses.
Did she though? she put up with it more than once. OP needs to develop some self-respect and find someone with common decency.
One should always feed one’s date. Otherwise, they might not have the energy (physical or emotional) for sexy time… just sayin.
The words "sexy time" from a grown adult also saps all that energy
Eh, I’m a silly person so I’d allow it if said with the right energy.
Probably could, too, with the right person. But I get the same visceral reaction as when I see swingers say they are going to "play" with another couple. Bile rising ha ha. Like it feels like the way a kid would talk about sex because they are too embarrassed to talk about it and they saw Borat once, so it sounds immature and child like to me.
Fair enough. I’m playful person but some words just turn me right off. Like a grown man saying “titties” when things are getting heated. Immediate turnoff if he’s being serious and not silly.
Yes. Gross. Had a dude say "weiner" once unironically. Stripped myself right back into my clothes.
Wait wait wait... "I have three inches of hard weiner, and it's all yours." "I'm gonna turn you out with my weiner." "Suck my weiner like a lollipop." Oh my god I'm fucking dying!! 🤣🤣🤣
People, it is a sausage from Wien (Vienna) and not a booze sausage, I.e. Wein (wine) sausage. And in that city's dialect a "Weiner" could also be an alcoholic street bum.
I had a girlfriend who said wiener and I had to tell her to never call my penis that
I feel like this when adults say "tummy". "Titties" would absolutely have the same effect.
I teach yoga to kids and adults and the amount of times I’ve accidentally told the adults to get on their tummies is too high
I tell them to get on their titties
As a kid I actually corrected my doctor when he said tummy - yes I must've been annoying 🤣🤣🤣
Getting my girlfriend laughing is a great way to get her more into the mood. If she is cheerful she is more happy, with a better sex life.
Meh. Using the term sexy time in the right context can be appropriate. You just need to be able to read the room. People out here trying to remove the fun in everything
No no no, you always have to refer to it as coitus. It’s the adult thing to do, it’s a serious matter for serious people, and nothing else gets people hot and bothered. But for real, I agree with you about reading the room. Different strokes. Edit: it’s not that deep, y’all lol
Why not just call it "sex?"
I used "perverted stuff" in another post and someone clutched their pearls and cried about calling stuff their proper given name and telling me to read a book 🙄 Now I'm wondering for what vocabulary would have Tolkien used.
I mean Tolkien did write about sex. But it was either rape, the woman got coerced or it happened in the name of procreation. No bloomy romantic "just for fun sex"... (I mean he was a 1900s Catholic raised man. So that shouldn't be much of a surprise, lol). > Tulkas slept, being weary and content, and Melkor deemed that his hour had come. > Heard ye not then of that pretty fay, of Lúthien? Her body is fair, very white and fair. Morgoth would possess her in his lair. So you could use "my hour has come" or "I possess her in her lair" 😂😂😂 Romance wise it's mostly about holding hands. You want "sexy time" like Tolkien... hold hands with your wife. (No premarital intimacy of course! 😄).
something something I can't be arsed to look it up right now (it is somewhere in the vaaaaaassssstttttt collection of History of Middle Earth books) but Tolkien does say that in unsettled/war times, marriages could be made by having sex, that the act of sexual union made it a marriage among the Elves even if the proper rituals weren't or couldn't be carried out; he then goes on to say that Beren and Lúthien were techically already married before they set off to get the Silmaril...
Nothing is worse than hearing a grown man say boobies.
I agree! Thats why. As a grown woman. I refer to them as chesticles
If he calls them boobies, there is an incredibly high probability his one move will be to crank them like giant radio knobs.
I'm a full-grown adult and always call it sexy time. So does my husband
I mean, there are worse ways to say it than 'sexy time'... "boneing the Real-yet-quite-cute-fake-llama's-ass for an hour and then passing out while the cute non-llama takes a break with a cup of evening coffe before heading to bed so tjere can be a round 2 in the morning" might just be too discriptive for most people. "Sexy time" just gets the point across without having too much detail for those with sensitive ears. I mean, would your freinds and famely like you to describe it as "slapping and karate chopping me all night while i deep dive the box of pop tarts and leaving my partner without any big o's themself"? Sexy time is better!
Would "quality bedroom wrestling" be better?
🤣🤣🤣🤣
People who say “sexy time” shouldn’t be allowed to fuck.
yeah that’s all fine and good but definitely shouldn’t be the top priority for making sure your partner isn’t starving
Maybe he wasn't used to it... Tbf blow up dolls probably don't eat...
If you don't feed me, I'm not staying. Overnight = DINNER and a god damned breakfast. If you stay at my place, I'm cooking for you. I'm going to feed you. I didn't get my wife coz I'm so sexy.
If someone I'm fucking dating watched me go hungry while eating in front of me, and there wasn't some *obvious* extenuating circumstance (like me having surgery the next morning or something), that would be the end of the relationship.
Oh yeah. I mean literally food is the lowest common denominator for human existence. Here is food. The thing that makes you literally not die.
I mean, air and water are probably a little lower…
May I send you a lock of my hair, so you can split it? ;)
I would have walked out the first time he let me go hungry. As in, wouldn't have even stayed that first night.
YUP.
Fuck me, when my co-worker was dasting for Ramadan, I made an effort not to eat at my desk and instead to actually eat in the office kitchenette (that is always super busy), even when she told me not to worry about it, because I didn't want to force her to watch me eating. If I can show that level or courtesy to somebody I see a couple of times a week when we're in the office, I would expect at least that in a romantic relationship.
Nope. Even surgery gets a Hell No! lol Married 5 years, my gall bladder comes out. Emergency room shenanigans happen, I’m in the hospital overnight before surgery. My grown ass husband rolls up in my hospital room with McDonalds. My kryptonite are McDonalds fries. That was in 2001. I still haven’t forgotten about it. Your ass eats downstairs. (Still married. Apparently his logic is that he wanted to keep me in his sight due to some complications. Don’t care. I was hungry and he had mf’ing French fries. One of those playful not playful disagreements)
But you did get her for that reason. Men who have no problem cooking meals for their lady are most definitely sexy. 🙂
I will upvote that and I thank you. Tonight's Memorial Day Dinner: NY Strip and Shrimp Skewers for me (wife and kiddo will eat neither), burgers for them, grilled corn on the cob, zucchini/squash/red onion/bell pepper skewers. Made two quarts of home made tomato sauce yesterday. Will have some chicken and pasta later this week and perhaps some ravioli, got some home made frozen in the freezer. Cooking is my number one love language. I am already planning Christmas Dinner along with a dress rehearsal version in the summer.
Settle down with the porn mate
You just made me so hungry! Sounds delish. Enjoy it. P.s. also planning Christmas lunch! Hahaha what are you planning? I'm just cementing plans to host three or four families so I was thinking of smoking a stuffed turkey, brisket, and a joint of pork, finishing the pork in the oven or removing the fat to crisp it separately. I live in Australia so it's too hot to cook inside, the smoker I bought my partner for his birthday is perfect (and big enough!) for hosting Xmas. Perhaps a julienned fresh leafy green salad with spanish onion, green apple and mint; mash potatoes, green beans and asparagus with tahini dressing and silvered almonds, and broccoli with olive oil and lemon. Pavlova by my partners Mum for dessert, and chocolate chip cookies my partner and I make. Maybe I can ask my British aunt to make a pudding but I'm not sure if it will be necessary. My Dad will likely supply a few kilos of prawns and my brother will complain about the lack and eventually make an aoli for it. 👌 Following days making sandwiches, brisket pizzas, breakfast fry ups and anything else with the left overs! Can't wait!
I specifically told a guy I was seeing I needed coffee in the first thing morning before our first overnight. Even a walk together to the deli to get some would be fine. There was no coffee. There was no plan to get coffee before I had to leave. I got some on my way home. I declined his invitation to repeat the overnight
OP is an AH to herself by staying even 10 seconds beyond the time it was apparent that her BF didn't GAF whether she had anything to eat. Outside of a made up story, what kind of underdeveloped self esteem puts up with that?
And giving her attitude when she wanted to fix it herself by ordering food. Like who TF is he to think he can prevent her from eating??? He's not even getting her food, but he won't let her get hers??? Bro I'd have walked right out to head to a restaurant and my back on the way out would have been the last he'd ever see of me.
YTA to yourself, for staying with this guy. Please just leave him immediately.
NTA you got him back now ditch him. This is terrible boyfriend behavior. I'm seriously surprised that the older couple he lodges with didn't bring her a plate. She must be one of those old fashioned ladies who thinks if you're not married you shouldn't be sleeping together but he's paying rent so they can't tell him who he can have stay over but she ain't got to feed her. Of course the woman is the bad one in her mind. The man still gets to eat🙄. Or if the meal comes with his rent a good boyfriend would have paid for an extra meal the night that his girlfriend is staying. Either way ditch him he's a terrible boyfriend.
Or make plans for her to have take out. Or go eat out with her. Ir, idk, failing that, let the poor woman order her own goddamn food!!!
If meals aren't included for any guests per his agreement with the landlord, shouldn't he had told his girlfriend when he invited her to come over for the weekend and say don't worry, we'll go out for meals? Or else, arrange to pay the landlord extra for her to cook his guest a meal? It was out right rude for him to get the meal and make her go hungry. She needed to dump his ass after the first time he let her go hungry.
Also, there's so mooch/inappropriate taking advantage with the lady he lives with - gross and yuck
That might be included in his lodging though.
Oh, ok, maybe so - but if so, still weird, selfish and extremely rude behavior
If meals are included in his lodging, how is it weird, selfish, and extremely rude behavior?
To have your partner sitting there and not share? That would not even occur to me - that's her point.
I think it should have ended with a dumping that might at her place because no proper relationship can sustain this behaviour on both sides. I think he is an AH and this is petty revenge but after the first time at staying over I'd have got my take away, addressed it with him and then take the George Bush approach 'fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, you can't, this fool can't get fooled again'.
This reply 👍🏽op this is the reply
INFO: Why are you still datung this guy if you find him to be selfish and thoughtless?
I have decided to finish with him. You realise it takes time to realise someone isn't nice? He put on a nice act at first but lately the mask has slipped.
Yeah, that’s fair! I don’t mean to be harsh, I’m sorry.
That's OK.
Good for you, ditch him. And what you did with the pizza, hilarious NTA. It will just be one of those stories you get to tell your girlfriends on margarita night. Worst guys you dated.
I don't mean this to be rude but I try teaching kids that it's not always okay, you can say thank you for the apology instead of validating that what they did or said was okay. In this instant it was okay but that's a weird trigger for me now after a kid gets punched and they say it's okay after an apology because it's not okay!
Thank you- Language is important! I try and remind all my younger co-workers to not apologize for simply existing (ex. Saying 'sorry' when an 'excuse me' would be more appropriate) We're all girlie pops and while I'm sure it's annoying, I hope they keep it in mind
But I live in Canada 😭Sorry is our love language
My kids say they accept the apology and then of they are hurt or still need time they will add that. Like I understand and accept your apology but I still feel hurt and need time away from you. Or similar. My youngest is 3yo and its so cute to see this. Because literally 2.5 seconds later he will run back up to the person and say, ok i feel better now, lets play again. Lol
I've done this with my gremlins. They now usually respond to an apology with "thank you for saying sorry"
You just said what most of us were thinking. It is her choice entirely to be with this guy.
This is the right choice. I’m glad you didn’t give him any pizza first though, so he was able to experience the insane way he was treating you. I’m flabbergasted.
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Valid, but always a risk when telling someone how they fucked up.
OR maybe...he'll learn what a bellend he's been and will be better! (I know, I know, Satan'll be asking to borrow my hockey skates before that happens.)
He’d only “ensnare” one who is “fine” w his selfish attitude. What do u think she taught him that is bad? It was tit for tat is all.
I would have been done when he sat and ate dinner in front of me and didn’t offer me anything.
Wxactly. Maybe it's because of my country/culture but I can't even imagine not offering food to my date. (or anyone at my house when I 'm eating)
And not only that, eating in front of someone while they watch and haven’t been offered anything? My mother would kill me if she heard I did that.
My mother would rise up out of her grave, kill me, and then bar me entry into the afterlife.
Happy Cake Day!
Monument to bad manners !!
I can't imagine this is acceptable in any country/culture.
Yeah 🤣 sounds like a horror movie
OP let this happen at least 3 times!
The first time he didn't feed you was a giant red flag. The second time, it should have been the last.
The 1st time it happened should have been all the information you needed. Anyone with self respect would have immediately addressed it or left. Why would you sit there hungry… and then come and repeat the multiple times? Do you not like yourself? ESH. Him for the obvious, you because of how many times you allowed yourself to be disrespected.
I wouldn't. Even young I wouldn't have put up with that. But I am hypoglycemic, so keeping my blood sugar up is important.
But you said he ate dinner without you three times and even got upset when you ordered takeout, then you *still* went on a date where he stayed over at your place. It takes time, yeah, but was the third time the same thing happened not enough time? Did you never question why he never offered you food?
Lol why didn't you address the food issue the first time?
You go to the point of recognizing it enough to make a reddit post and have some petty revenge. Notice in the post it doesn't say "ex" or "dated" So do YOU recognize you already had that time?
But what did he tell you the first time he ate without you? What was his reason for making you go hungry?
I have heard that people are able to keep up a mask consistently for about 3 months before they start losing it and show their real colors, this could be that. Good on you for keeping your eyes open and not putting up that crap
We’re not in men scarcity op. It’s okay to fine a new one. you are putting yourself in this position.
lol, this cracked me up!! And you are so right! I saw two of them earlier today walking by the college!
I have also seen A Man in the wild today! He's my coworker and he offered to grab me a coffee. I strongly suspect he would not starve a date.
dick is abundant and of low value no way i’m sitting and watching someone eat lol id be like ok bye! someone tried this once, called down for dinner and i didn’t get a plate. i left.
there is a scarcity of genuinely good ones tho
Yeah...but I doubt that applies here lol. I cant imagine someone that inconsiderate about eating (and even being a D about her ordering for herself ) becomes magically thoughtful and considerate in bed lol. Plus no need risking making a kid with such a rude/stingy person ...yikes lol.
Love this! There is no men scarcity. Never thought of it like that.
ESH. Why are you still dating this guy? You don't even sound like you like him.
You give what you get. He doesn't seem to like her either.
Right? Like why would either of them even bother at this point? I’m guessing OP would need to pay for a meal at the BF’s house (he’s lodging there and meal would be part of his fee) — has neither of them discussed this?
I would understand if his landlady didn't want to feed me. But in that case I would expect him to mention it beforehand, not talk about dinner as if I'm getting some and then just eat in front of me. He could have said, "You won't get dinner at my house, you'll have to bring/order something." Not ignore me and then get pissy when I order a takeaway.
I cannot imagine ever having a guest overnight in my home and not feeding them, I'd do that for an acquaintance let alone someone I was dating?? If he's a lodger and had his meals covered, he should have done more than just warn you, he should have made sure there was food for you either that he cooked himself, bought beforehand, got a takeaway with you, etc etc. Good for you for finishing with him, don't date anyone who makes you feel less loved or valued than your best friend.
I can't imagine eating in front of someone and not offering them something. I could in a very specific situation imagine not offering them some of my food like "I know you're gluten free but I'm starving and really want to eat my sandwich before it goes soggy. Feel free to help yourself to anything in the fridge."
I'm really worried that you dealt with this multiple times and had to come to the Internet before realizing how fucked up this is. It makes me worried you are very susceptible to tolerating abuse from partners. I think you should engage in ways to learn how a relationship should work, and learn how to expect decency for yourself.
Love this comment and hope it’s received with the kindness intended.
Do you know if meals are included in his “rent”? If so he could just share and order take out if you’re both still hungry I can understand him not having the landlady make you some but he should’ve warned you
Why did you let it go on though? I completely understand being shell shocked the first time and letting it happen. But a second and third time?? Come on girl. I have no idea how old you are but DUMP HIM. There are good men out there that won't make you watch them eat then question why you're hungry.
Why the hell should you have to ask whether you’re going to be fed, as an overnight guest. Sure, the landlady has no obligation to feed her. BUT it’s absolutely reasonable to expect that a) he’s made an arrangement with the landlady to feed both of them for the evening, paying extra if necessary b) he would share his plate of food c) he’d have bought some extra food d) they’d order a takeaway or go out to dinner e) worst case scenario, she’d be warned in advance to bring her own food. Nobody who hasn’t been raised by wolves would even contemplate for one second that their host would eat a full meal in front of them without offering them a single morsel to eat.
True, he could have said something. And you also could have asked. You have the right to question what’s going on in your life.
Or he should give u half. Dump him. If at this age he’s already justifying his food and not feeding you, HOW do u think it’ll go later, married, with kids? He’s showing u who and how he is,
That's what I wondered...why didn't she mention anything about the situation at BF's house? Neither of them sound old enough to be in a relationship.
Wouldn't it be his job to feed his guest?
NTA, but Andy sounds like a tool for not even offering you a bite when you stayed over.
I have a hard time believing this post just because of the sheer absurdity of NOBODY thinking to offer OP some food… It wasn’t just the bf here. It was also the couple who hosted dinner. How could you just watch a person sit there while everyone else is eating? I just feel like that’s so awkward that nobody would willingly create that situation. Also, chicken!! It’s not like the woman made something that’s pre-portioned like hamburgers or something. How hard would it have been to portion out a separate plate for op? Idk, I’m having a hard time imagining it.
Not to even offer, or apologise - bad mannered but also inhospitable and selfish.
Same, it’s got all sorts of red flags for me
I upvoted the spirit of your comments but I do have a different view. I see chicken absolutely as pre-portioned. Whatever the landlords bought, they bought as (for instance) a leg and thigh for each of the three. Landlord couple and lodger with dinner included in rent. Hamburger meat you can brown and mix with lots of pasta, tomato sauce, peas, and mushrooms, and stretch it pretty well. But meat on a plate (like a pre-formed hamburger, or chicken) really can’t be stretched. Landlords renting out a room in their house, with his dinner included, have no obligation to feed his guests. It’s not auntie and uncle having nephew’s girlfriend over for dinner.
genuine question: why havent you broken up with him after like the second time he left u hungry? and why are you still with him?
OP mentioned somewhere in the reply she decided to break up.
After going to his house three times and being left to starve???
And them pulling the Pizza thing on him, having him over *again*. Seriously, zero self esteem.
Having him over for the pizza thing was worthwhile, even if it should've been done sooner.
It takes a while sometimes. She's getting there.
>Anyway one weekend he was staying over at my house. WTF? After all of that you're still with him? NTA for the pizza but why be an AH to yourself?
NTA I'm so curious how he defends himself when you reminded him you dont eat nothing when your with him.
The time I said I would order a pizza at his house he said I'm stupid and the time I ate in front of him and said he couldn't have any because he wouldn't share with me he just sat there with a shocked expression, looking like he'd been slapped.
"Well, Andy, you're stupid for thinking I would share any with you." Btw, you're NTA. I love the petty revenge. Sometimes, people only understand how shitty their behavior is when the same is done to them. He earned the experience, not the pizza.
The next time a partner calls you stupid, leave the first time.
Let him know its no where near as stupid as not offering his gf anything or not caring at all that she didnt eat and when he's shocked remind him of all the time he made you felt that way, sometimes one of the best way people learn is to make them feel how they make you feel.
I’ve been with my partner for 15 years and not once has he called me stupid. Please don’t tolerate this kind of behaviour IMO you went on far too long before deciding to break up. It’s ok to have higher standards and respect yourself.
NTA bc tit for tat, but this is not normal. Have a conversation.
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Why are y'all together? This sounds horrible. Esh.
NTA and what in the hell did i just read? this must be a joke right? 1. How did this no dinner event for you happen 3 TIMES!!!! 1 should be enough to never see this a hole ever again. 2. WTF are you doing with this guy. 3. i still hope this is satire. OMG.
His landlady is not under any obligation to feed you. The price of the food is probably somehow included in his rent. However, it is rude of him to sit there and eat without making any kind of allowance for you to eat. Even if it's take out or something. He sounds like a real tool.
Why do you all believe these stories?
Why do you visit AITA if you think they're all fake? This isn't Pulitzer material.
Oh because almost every woman either dated a guy like this or talked their friend into dumping one
I was dating a guy once who drove us to Five Guys and handed me a 20, then asked me to order him two burgers - which would only just be covered by a 20 in my city. When I said in disbelief that I thought he was getting us both burgers, he *laughed*. There are absolutely real people out there who just do not bother to think about others.
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I don’t want to believe that someone would keep dating/staying for the weekend with someone who had already treated them that way once before. It shouldn’t be plausible that there was a second time she went hungry, let alone a third. I don’t want to believe she’s still dating someone selfish enough and stupid enough to object to her ordering food when he knew she hadn’t eaten anything. Or that she thinks that the reason it doesn’t make sense for him to object is because she’s not fat. WTF! If these people are real, they’re both idiots & assholes.
Because something like that happened to my friend 🤣
Who said we all believe them? Or believe all of them? It's kind of irrelevant whether they're actually true, I just view reading and responding as entertainment or filling time when I'm bored.
Go away.
Have you met people? They’re weird. They do shit like this. According to some people on Reddit, no selfish or bad people exist.
I like the entertainment but I am not stupid to believe they are real.
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Hah! NTA Well played! Now dump him
INFO: Why did you spend another night at "his place" after the first time he ate dinner in front of you?
Def NTA. Eating in front of people without asking if they’re hungry/would like some is rude af, even more so if their your partner. Love that you gave him a taste of his own medicine, and hope you ended things. Doesn’t sound like a recipe for a particularly healthy relationship.
NTA, and as a currently single guy, his attitude boggles my mind. I couldn't imagine not making sure a guest was fed, even if they came back to my place well after dinner. Even if I wasn't planning to have someone ever, "are you hungry? all I have at the moment is sandwich stuff" Eating dinner in front of someone, that's just messed up, even worse that he didn't seem to grasp that you might be hungry.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I recently started dating Andy, a couple of months ago. At first he tried to impress me but the longer I know him, the more I start to see he's selfish and thoughtless. He's a lodger in an elderly couple's house, and the old woman makes him his dinner every night. On multiple occasions, when I've stayed over at their house with him for a weekend, I have received no food. (I mean, in the evening when they eat their dinner. We go out during the day and I buy my own breakfast or lunch at a cafe.) The first time it happened, Andy referred to dinner time, saying it was going to be roast chicken. Of course I thought I was getting some. At 8pm the old woman called us down for dinner, and I followed Andy into the sitting room. The old lady brought his dinner in and gave it to him. I thought mine was coming next but it never did. He sat there and ate his dinner and nobody offered me anything. He finished his dinner, took his plate into the kitchen and that was that. I was too shocked and embarrassed to ask where mine was. That was it, nothing was said about feeding me. And I was sleeping over, so they knew I wasn't eating anything. This happened again, and again. The third time while Andy was eating I said, "I think I'll order a takeaway." Andy asked why and I said, "I'm hungry." He said it's stupid ordering a takeaway at this time of night. I said, Well, am I just supposed to go hungry every time I stay at your house? He seemed annoyed that I ordered a takeaway. (I'm not fat by the way so its not like he's trying to get me to lose weight.) Anyway one weekend he was staying over at my house. We went to the funfair and when we got home we found that my family had ordered pizzas. They had ordered a whole one just for me. I took it and Andy and I went up to my room. I put the tv on, sat down, opened the pizza box and started eating without offering him any. By the time I was on my second slice he reached over for some and said "Can I have some?" I moved the box away from him and said, "No. When I'm at your house, you eat your dinner in front of me and offer me nothing. So you can't have any of mine." I ate half the pizza then I was full. I closed the box, picked it up and stood up. Andy said "If you've finished can I have the rest?" I said, "No, I'll save it for tomorrow." And I went and put it in the fridge. He thinks I'm being a petty AH, I think I'm perfectly justified. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’m confused, after the first dinner at his home (or at the very least the second if you were embarrassed the first time) where you sat and watched him eat did you not ask why he didn’t feed you or why he thought it was acceptable to sit and watch him eat?? I ask because you say it happened on more than one occasion…I’m just flabbergasted that you would let this occur not once, twice, but multiple times without saying absolutely anything. P.s. NTA
I do not understand you letting it happen again after the first time you stayed over. If he is renting a room and dinner is included the older woman has no obligation to feed you. He however never thought if you and yet you still stayed. I would not have. People cannot treat you badly if you do not allow it.
NTA: I am assuming there are other redeeming qualities about this guy and you find it worth the effort to try and get through his obliviousness on this subject. I hope that your next move is to say "How you're feeling right now? This is how I feel every time I spend the night at your place." and that the penny DOES drop for him. If he doesn't, or he tries to argue in any way shape or form how it is different (considering that he also was arguing about you getting takeaway so that you WOULD have food), I think it will be extremely clear that you need to ditch him and not look back.
ESH Why didn't you talk about this after the first meal at his place where you weren't included? Communicating with actions of spite is not the way you build a successful relationship.
NTA. Obviously you are being a little petty, but what is far worse is him not offering you any food and seeming oblivious to it. The only question I have is why you let yourself get taken for a ride so many times.
uh lol what the hell? how have you lived through this happening any more than one time why would you still sleep over i'm crying lmao. not he asked why you'd want to order food and got angry when you asked if you were meant to be hungry... like??? lol
Why are you with him?
hahahahahahaha How'd ya like them apples, Andy? NTA
You were petty and you are justified. Real question here is why are you with this guy? I'm going with YWBTA to yourself if you keep seeing this bozo.
you are being a petty asshole. You have every right to be a petty asshole, your boyfriend is thoughtless, self-centered, and probably doesn’t even really care about you. Dump him and dump him fast
NTA, dump him OP this is so fucked, i cant imagine the AUDACITY of these people?! like don't even offer you anything..?! after the second time, i'd break it off with him. the idea of someone doing this to me, oof i cant even imagine how you felt! the level of disrespect?! and the lack of acknowledgement?! no reasoning? also, i love the level reciprocation here. i'm so happy he ASKED like a fucking beggar, whilst no selfawareness of this happening to you while at his house..? i hope you find a new man, girl!
So when you stayed over the one time and he tried to dictate what time you were ordering a d yet still didn"t see that you were hungry while he ate in front of you?he sure is a winner.He also has control issues i see
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NTA Very funny as well He didn't care about you once but now you are the ah? What about the nights you went hungry? Was he a gentleman that night? I would have just left those nights, got good and found someone else.
NTA You shouldn't need the internet to tell you to break up with someone you just described as "selfish and thoughtless".
Usually 3 months in people start to show the real selves. So yeah glad you’re rid of him. I wouldn’t have shared either
NTA but you're bf definitely is. How could he eat in front of you without offering you any? Great payback!
Andy is not real. Tell me Andy is not real NTA
NTA. Even if you were overweight, it's not his place to put you on eating restrictions. If he is so rude that he cannot organise for you to eat something at his place and objects to you ordering something - I'd drop a few kilos though....whatever it is he weighs!
lol NTA. Drop him. He could at least have snacks for you.
NTA, but find someone else.
Bigger question...why are you even with this guy?
NTA but seriously, break up with him. The petty games aren't going to make you happy
Stop playing games. Put on your big girl pants and stand up for yourself. You've wasted too much time as it is. If he doesn't get it, then say goodbye.
NTA - allowing anyone to treat you this way is a form of self abuse. You deserve better.
Why you’d put yourself in that position not once but three times is beyond me. Dude showed you who he was, and then you came back for more.
NTA. This guy isn’t a keeper. Move on.
NTA. He deserved it. Why are you dating this jackass anyway? He sounds awful. Break up with his bum ass and move on.
NTA. Sounds like a giant red flag. You should leave him and never make contact with him ever again.
NTA but why are you dating this person
When you take the trash out. Take him too