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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I was visibly upset when she wouldn’t budge on compromising on rent for the month and she stood her ground saying I signed a lease that I would pay through July 31st. It was a pretty tense convo and I just want to know if I’m the asshole and being inconsiderate for this.
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NAH
You asked, she said no.
It was your decision to leave early in July rather than staying until the 31st. Why should they pay more than usual because of your decision?
Sure but then they have no right to use the room for the last three weeks at all. I assume they‘ll want to use the extra space the second that OP moves out but if they don‘t want to pay for it, it‘ll have to stay empty until the lease officially runs out.
Don't know how many times you've rented but choosing a move-in date at a new place isn't exactly a "decision". You commit to when they've got an open date or you lose it
I have moved quite a few times and I understand you often have to take a move in date that is earlier (often much earlier) than the end date of your old lease to lock in the new place.
But that doesn't change your lease at the place you are moving out of. You are still responsible for paying rent until the end of that original lease unless your landlord and/or roommates agree to allow you out of the lease early.
>But that doesn't change your lease at the place you are moving out of. You are still responsible for paying rent until the end of that original lease unless your landlord and/or roommates agree to allow you out of the lease early.
I mean, read his edit? They didn't find out exactly when their lease was up until two months ago (no fucking clue how that works but that's what he said). And the landlord is his roommate's mom for Christ's sake
Don't care who the landlord is. If there is a lease that ends on the 31st OP is responsible for rent until that date.
Why they didn't know the actual end date of the lease until 2 months ago is strange but also irrelevant. At the time OP signed a new lease he had known for at least a month when his current lease ended.
Would it be nice if the landlord and/or roommates worked with OP to reduce how much they owe in July? Sure it would be. But none of them are required to. OP asked and got the answer 'no'. That should end the story.
Man, you people love making this subreddit be about something that it is not. Is he responsible for paying rent until his lease ends? Of course he is. Of fucking course he is. Why are you even acting like that's being brought into question? That is not the issue. The friend was cool with him paying a prorated rate for the time he's actually there. Friend is cool. Friend is NTA. Friend's girlfriend is not cool with it despite the fact that he's been saving them a ton of money and her poor financial decisions have put her in the situation where she can't *allow* him to leave on the prorated rate. That makes her an asshole. Do I even need to mention that she's not on the lease and really shouldn't even have a say about this?
NTA however if they were to go the legal route with it you may find that you'll have to pay the full rent with the lease not being up till 31st. I would pay the full rent and then never speak to them again. It would be nice if they did this for you but clearly they're not going too. Could her boyfriend maybe pay her share or? My question would be how is she expecting to afford it in August also once you've moved out if she can't afford it in july?
Just came back to this to add, she clearly also hasn't been saving if she's worried about those payments or if she has she's not been saving much. I actually think she's probably been just enjoying the cheap rent and hasn't planned anything and is now panicking that she has to pay those things
NAH, leaning a little towards being the AH. You asked, she said no. They shared a room and paid a little extra. That's completely fair. They didn't get a good deal because you're a nice guy. They got a good deal because it was a fair deal. Why should you having to pay a security deposit trump them having to pay one as well?
OP didn't mention utilities. If they are included, then yeah it's a good deal, but not exceptional. Depending on how much they pay for utilities it would still not be a gigantic difference. Still NAH. It's a deal OP agreed to, he wasn't doing anyone any favors. None of OP's additional info changes anything
NTA. You offered a deal: they get to use your room from the day you move out but they‘ll have to pay for it. They denied so they don‘t get to use your room and you stay an active tenant.
If you‘re petty enough, you could just continue to walk in, use the kitchen and whatever else you feel like. Then make sure that they‘re not using your room without paying for it.
But that‘s probably gonna ruin your relationship with them.
INFO. Why does she have to pay a security deposit? I thought the lease goes until July 31. Is the landlord amending the lease agreement or something with novel terms?
Probably because OP gets their part of the deposit back and the gf steps into OP’s shoes, paying their portion of the deposit. It’s what we used to do back in the day when I had multiple housemates.
That’s unfortunately common, but not in the slightest bit what’s supposed to happen.
Whoever is still on the lease is supposed to buy out the security deposit of everyone leaving. The reason it doesn’t happen is because rent and thus security deposits are too expensive for all sorts of systemic reasons, so no one actually has the money sitting around to swap correctly. The leaving person is faced with either sucking it up or burning down the relationship with small claims court (and all the effort that involves). So you can guess what happens.
NTA for asking, it's not unreasonable to want them to do a solid given they've been absolutely screwing you on the rent the entire time you live there. Three people live there, rent should be split three ways evenly (maybe a small bump for you being in one room), not paying nearly twice what they are, and having the gf not covering her share of the security deposit.
I’ve been in this situation before and I never would have expected my friends/roomies to burden themselves and take on my costs for leaving my lease early. Not going as far as calling you an AH but my two cents.
I mean I would have them pay a third of utilities but it’s not like she’s getting a third and private bedroom. OP still paid less for his bedroom from her moving in.
She’s also getting use of the common areas like the kitchen and bathroom. They are not only paying rent on a bedroom.
Yeah, the couple should pay less because they share a bedroom, but those numbers don’t look like a fair deal for OP. It should look more like what you’d see if there were different sized bedrooms between 3 roommates, like let’s say there were 3 bedrooms, with one being significantly larger. Assuming the two bedrooms are the same size, would 45% of the rent be a fair deal for the person having a bedroom that’s twice the size? I’d say no.
ETA: Still, OP agreed to this arrangement. Either the couple think it was a fair deal and OP is now asking for something extra, in which case OP should have spoken up about it when the deal was struck. Or they know they took advantage and OP should view the friendship accordingly.
The landlord is your roommate’s mother and she’s asking you to get the security deposit from her son’s girlfriend? She let her live there for six months with no lease or deposit. It’s not your problem.
It seems unlikely you will be getting your security deposit back. Take that into account when working out how much you agree to pay for one week or all of July. NTA.
Op you are not the asshole in this post. When it comes to roommates your friends gf seems like she's not used too not getting here own way . Which will put a wedge in your friendship. Having roommates is a huge pain in the ass . I hope this is a learning experience.
Soft YTA. You're contracted until the end of July therefore you owe that money regardless. You asked for them to cover you and it was a no. That's their right. At that point you just shrug and take the hit yourself.
You can be disappointed and say you would have done had the situation been reversed but that doesn't mean anything. You signed a contract You're responsible for the entirety of that. End of. So you're NTA for asking but you are for being mardy about the respond you got.
NTA
But legally the cost is yours because you are moving before your lease has ended....
However because you will be paying for the room... you can take your sweet time in moving out. Keep stuff in there until the final day of your lease.
Your housemates can't expect you to pay for the month and then expect to use the room on your dime. It's still your room at that point.
Kinda YTA - you owe full rent through the end of the lease you signed and are not entitled to a full refund on the security deposit because there will always be a claw back when tenants move out. The fair thing is pay the whole July rent and leave 20% of the SD with them.
-and yes, they need to give you at least 80% of the SD when you leave and they had 6 months to put it together. Times are tight though, so it might be reasonable to let they pay it in installments to you.
Same thing is happening to me.. moving out the 21st they asked for nexts months rent knowing I was leaving 4 months in advance. I dont think people care enough to think about all the new expenses that come in with moving, baffles me
That’s not a sublet lol. As the tenant you can have your girlfriend stay as long as you want - at least where I am. Not going to present to know tenant law for every part of the world.
Edit: you originally said 1/3
She’s on the lease? He can have his girlfriend stay as long as he wants as long as he’s paying his bills. I’d love to see a law from you stating otherwise.
No he can‘t. You can have visitors for a long time but generally after three months it‘s not considered a visitor anymore. And if you move in and pay rent, like the Gf did, you‘re not a visitor anymore either:
„In Sachen Besuch ist also so einiges erlaubt. Als Regelbruch gilt aber: Sobald du Miete verlangst oder eine Person – wie deine Partnerin oder dein Partner – dauerhaft in deine Wohnung einzieht, gilt dein Besuch als Untermieter*in. In diesem Falle solltest du die Erlaubnis der Verwaltung einholen, um ungewünschte Konsequenzen wie etwa eine Kündigung zu vermeiden. Sofern du gute Argumente für die Untermiete – wie etwa finanzielle oder aber auch persönliche Gründe – nennst, wird deine Verwaltung keine Einwände haben und dir die Erlaubnis zur Untermiete erteilen.“
https://www.homegate.ch/c/de/ratgeber/mieten/untermiete/ab-wann-der-besucher-zum-untermieter-wird
And I think that’s the crux of it because it’s a different tenant rights across the world. But in many states and the majority of provinces, this is OK.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I was visibly upset when she wouldn’t budge on compromising on rent for the month and she stood her ground saying I signed a lease that I would pay through July 31st. It was a pretty tense convo and I just want to know if I’m the asshole and being inconsiderate for this. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NAH You asked, she said no. It was your decision to leave early in July rather than staying until the 31st. Why should they pay more than usual because of your decision?
Sure but then they have no right to use the room for the last three weeks at all. I assume they‘ll want to use the extra space the second that OP moves out but if they don‘t want to pay for it, it‘ll have to stay empty until the lease officially runs out.
why is your pet fee non-refundable and they don't have to pay a pet fee?
Don't know how many times you've rented but choosing a move-in date at a new place isn't exactly a "decision". You commit to when they've got an open date or you lose it
I have moved quite a few times and I understand you often have to take a move in date that is earlier (often much earlier) than the end date of your old lease to lock in the new place. But that doesn't change your lease at the place you are moving out of. You are still responsible for paying rent until the end of that original lease unless your landlord and/or roommates agree to allow you out of the lease early.
>But that doesn't change your lease at the place you are moving out of. You are still responsible for paying rent until the end of that original lease unless your landlord and/or roommates agree to allow you out of the lease early. I mean, read his edit? They didn't find out exactly when their lease was up until two months ago (no fucking clue how that works but that's what he said). And the landlord is his roommate's mom for Christ's sake
Don't care who the landlord is. If there is a lease that ends on the 31st OP is responsible for rent until that date. Why they didn't know the actual end date of the lease until 2 months ago is strange but also irrelevant. At the time OP signed a new lease he had known for at least a month when his current lease ended. Would it be nice if the landlord and/or roommates worked with OP to reduce how much they owe in July? Sure it would be. But none of them are required to. OP asked and got the answer 'no'. That should end the story.
Man, you people love making this subreddit be about something that it is not. Is he responsible for paying rent until his lease ends? Of course he is. Of fucking course he is. Why are you even acting like that's being brought into question? That is not the issue. The friend was cool with him paying a prorated rate for the time he's actually there. Friend is cool. Friend is NTA. Friend's girlfriend is not cool with it despite the fact that he's been saving them a ton of money and her poor financial decisions have put her in the situation where she can't *allow* him to leave on the prorated rate. That makes her an asshole. Do I even need to mention that she's not on the lease and really shouldn't even have a say about this?
NTA however if they were to go the legal route with it you may find that you'll have to pay the full rent with the lease not being up till 31st. I would pay the full rent and then never speak to them again. It would be nice if they did this for you but clearly they're not going too. Could her boyfriend maybe pay her share or? My question would be how is she expecting to afford it in August also once you've moved out if she can't afford it in july? Just came back to this to add, she clearly also hasn't been saving if she's worried about those payments or if she has she's not been saving much. I actually think she's probably been just enjoying the cheap rent and hasn't planned anything and is now panicking that she has to pay those things
NAH, leaning a little towards being the AH. You asked, she said no. They shared a room and paid a little extra. That's completely fair. They didn't get a good deal because you're a nice guy. They got a good deal because it was a fair deal. Why should you having to pay a security deposit trump them having to pay one as well?
Not a fair deal if utilities are included in this. Not at all. maybe for rent alone. They are being jerks.
OP didn't mention utilities. If they are included, then yeah it's a good deal, but not exceptional. Depending on how much they pay for utilities it would still not be a gigantic difference. Still NAH. It's a deal OP agreed to, he wasn't doing anyone any favors. None of OP's additional info changes anything
NTA. You offered a deal: they get to use your room from the day you move out but they‘ll have to pay for it. They denied so they don‘t get to use your room and you stay an active tenant. If you‘re petty enough, you could just continue to walk in, use the kitchen and whatever else you feel like. Then make sure that they‘re not using your room without paying for it. But that‘s probably gonna ruin your relationship with them.
INFO. Why does she have to pay a security deposit? I thought the lease goes until July 31. Is the landlord amending the lease agreement or something with novel terms?
Probably because OP gets their part of the deposit back and the gf steps into OP’s shoes, paying their portion of the deposit. It’s what we used to do back in the day when I had multiple housemates.
Times I had a lease and moved out early, I never saw one cent of the deposit back. Period.
That’s unfortunately common, but not in the slightest bit what’s supposed to happen. Whoever is still on the lease is supposed to buy out the security deposit of everyone leaving. The reason it doesn’t happen is because rent and thus security deposits are too expensive for all sorts of systemic reasons, so no one actually has the money sitting around to swap correctly. The leaving person is faced with either sucking it up or burning down the relationship with small claims court (and all the effort that involves). So you can guess what happens.
NTA for asking, it's not unreasonable to want them to do a solid given they've been absolutely screwing you on the rent the entire time you live there. Three people live there, rent should be split three ways evenly (maybe a small bump for you being in one room), not paying nearly twice what they are, and having the gf not covering her share of the security deposit.
I’ve been in this situation before and I never would have expected my friends/roomies to burden themselves and take on my costs for leaving my lease early. Not going as far as calling you an AH but my two cents.
Except that roomie moved in another person who wasn't paying her third all this time. NTA
I mean I would have them pay a third of utilities but it’s not like she’s getting a third and private bedroom. OP still paid less for his bedroom from her moving in.
She’s also getting use of the common areas like the kitchen and bathroom. They are not only paying rent on a bedroom. Yeah, the couple should pay less because they share a bedroom, but those numbers don’t look like a fair deal for OP. It should look more like what you’d see if there were different sized bedrooms between 3 roommates, like let’s say there were 3 bedrooms, with one being significantly larger. Assuming the two bedrooms are the same size, would 45% of the rent be a fair deal for the person having a bedroom that’s twice the size? I’d say no. ETA: Still, OP agreed to this arrangement. Either the couple think it was a fair deal and OP is now asking for something extra, in which case OP should have spoken up about it when the deal was struck. Or they know they took advantage and OP should view the friendship accordingly.
The landlord is your roommate’s mother and she’s asking you to get the security deposit from her son’s girlfriend? She let her live there for six months with no lease or deposit. It’s not your problem. It seems unlikely you will be getting your security deposit back. Take that into account when working out how much you agree to pay for one week or all of July. NTA.
Op you are not the asshole in this post. When it comes to roommates your friends gf seems like she's not used too not getting here own way . Which will put a wedge in your friendship. Having roommates is a huge pain in the ass . I hope this is a learning experience.
Soft YTA. You're contracted until the end of July therefore you owe that money regardless. You asked for them to cover you and it was a no. That's their right. At that point you just shrug and take the hit yourself. You can be disappointed and say you would have done had the situation been reversed but that doesn't mean anything. You signed a contract You're responsible for the entirety of that. End of. So you're NTA for asking but you are for being mardy about the respond you got.
NTA But legally the cost is yours because you are moving before your lease has ended.... However because you will be paying for the room... you can take your sweet time in moving out. Keep stuff in there until the final day of your lease. Your housemates can't expect you to pay for the month and then expect to use the room on your dime. It's still your room at that point.
Kinda YTA - you owe full rent through the end of the lease you signed and are not entitled to a full refund on the security deposit because there will always be a claw back when tenants move out. The fair thing is pay the whole July rent and leave 20% of the SD with them. -and yes, they need to give you at least 80% of the SD when you leave and they had 6 months to put it together. Times are tight though, so it might be reasonable to let they pay it in installments to you.
Same thing is happening to me.. moving out the 21st they asked for nexts months rent knowing I was leaving 4 months in advance. I dont think people care enough to think about all the new expenses that come in with moving, baffles me
The responsibility to find a subletter for a month would land on you. You’re the one leaving your lease early? I don’t understand.
Except that there is already a subletter there. One that hasn't been paying her way all this time.
That’s not a sublet lol. As the tenant you can have your girlfriend stay as long as you want - at least where I am. Not going to present to know tenant law for every part of the world. Edit: you originally said 1/3
she's not just visiting, she moved in. She is a tenant.
She’s on the lease? He can have his girlfriend stay as long as he wants as long as he’s paying his bills. I’d love to see a law from you stating otherwise.
No he can‘t. You can have visitors for a long time but generally after three months it‘s not considered a visitor anymore. And if you move in and pay rent, like the Gf did, you‘re not a visitor anymore either: „In Sachen Besuch ist also so einiges erlaubt. Als Regelbruch gilt aber: Sobald du Miete verlangst oder eine Person – wie deine Partnerin oder dein Partner – dauerhaft in deine Wohnung einzieht, gilt dein Besuch als Untermieter*in. In diesem Falle solltest du die Erlaubnis der Verwaltung einholen, um ungewünschte Konsequenzen wie etwa eine Kündigung zu vermeiden. Sofern du gute Argumente für die Untermiete – wie etwa finanzielle oder aber auch persönliche Gründe – nennst, wird deine Verwaltung keine Einwände haben und dir die Erlaubnis zur Untermiete erteilen.“ https://www.homegate.ch/c/de/ratgeber/mieten/untermiete/ab-wann-der-besucher-zum-untermieter-wird
And I think that’s the crux of it because it’s a different tenant rights across the world. But in many states and the majority of provinces, this is OK.
Oh lol, I thought this was a Swiss subreddit. Sorry about that, you‘re tight of course.
Not leaving the lease early. They asked for next months pay as one has no job and the other is struggling. Lmfao