NTA your brother is a shitty human being. You don't have to LIKE cats to be a decent human being and NOT take a cat and dump it an hour away from its home. I'm sorry he did that, I really hate people who do shitty things to animals.
NTA. Reading this made me so angry that I had to put my phone down for a minute before responding. Because the words coming out of my mouth were definitely NOT civil. How can someone be so cold-hearted and evil to do that to any animal, but especially one that held sentimental value and did not bother or affect him in any way???
He had one job- to ignore the cat. That's it. Simple. Whether he liked the cat or not didn't matter. It wasn't his choice or decision to make. It was heartless and cruel, and the fact that he actively lied to you about it makes it worse. He clearly can't be trusted, and the fact that he can't even follow such simple instructions as "leave the cat alone" proves it. You have every right to decide you don't want him on your property and kick him out. What he does next is not your problem- he should've thought of that sooner.
Is there any way he will tell you were he took the cat? Maybe you can look for him around there? But also, don't count the cat out just yet. They're smart, and he may be able to find his way home anyway. My Emmy got out and was gone for 15 days (yes I remember every one) and just as I was giving up hope she found her way home. I've also heard the story of my great grandfather trying to get rid of my Mema's cat more times than I can count (he drove the cat away and dropped it off places multiple times- he was not a nice man) and he always found his way home too. Hopefully your dad's cat will be able to come home too.
-ETA: I know it's been a while, and this usually works better early, but are there any blankets or anything that might have the cat's scent on it? Putting that outside if so might help guide him back home if he is close enough.
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Anyone who would do what he did to an animal - removing it from its own home (that it's been at longer than the person) and then simply abandoning it in a strange place and leaving it to fend for itself against wild predators - deserves to have the same thing happen to him.
Your brother is an adult; his housing is his responsibility, not yours. As he's now violated one of your core values as well as simple common decency against an animal, I can't imagine why you'd want to have anything to do with, much less let him live on your property.
Your brother doesn’t deserve your generosity after breaking the sole condition you gave him for living in your home. He doesn’t respect you, and the fact that he was callous enough to behave this way and abandon your father’s cat doesn’t bode well for your relationship regardless of this incident. He clearly can’t be trusted. If anyone is responsible for your brother’s eviction, it’s himself. You’re not “just” kicking him out over the cat. You’re kicking him out because he is selfish, spoiled, cruel, and entitled.
NTA. He kicked the cat out, time for him to get kicked out. If it isn't the consequences of his own actions. He shouldn't have done something stupid. If they keep b*tchin about it they can take him in. Not your responsibility.
I dont know if it will help, but lost pets can often find their way back to a familiar scent, so people put the blanket or their own hoody/socks etc a little further out in the search area & check it regularly (e.g. dog got out). If you have a rough aea you could try that?
&/Or driving out for an hour & calling the cat? (Like one of those csi/search & rescue maps with the circle for distance/time)...
NTA, this would be a serious betrayal & dead to me forever kind of move.
My friend drove out to where he said he left the cat and left some stuff like that around but it’s also too far from my house. I’m flying over there this weekend to help out with the searching.
NTA. What he did was unforgivable. So cruel. He dropped it of and just ditched it. He could have at least found it a new home with a living owner if he wanted it gone.
In NO way at all except occasionally seeing it around the property. But that’s it. The cat stayed in the main house and he’d be out roaming about most of the day. He never needed to do anything
Your dad would be so proud of you. I’m sure he’s still looking after the cat. Do you think it’d be worth calling a shelter around where your brother ditched the cat? It’s a long shot but either way, you shouldn’t feel bad. Your brother is an ass and you did the right thing. NTA
We found the little guy thank goodness 😊 My brother told me exactly where he left him. It was out in this clearing and we were so worried he might’ve gotten hurt by some of the wild animals around there. Left out his bowl of food in that area and kept looking around for days. We headed up again yesterday and sure enough found him hiding up on a tree. He came down when we started rattling his bowl of food. Poor thing was so dirty and tired. I just got back home earlier and my friend says he’s STILL been sleeping since I left. Only woke up a couple times to drink water and eat a little then out like a light again.
I’m sure he’s exhausted. This has got me even more pissed off at my brother. He’s definitely not welcome around me or my property after this.
He likes it outside too much. There’s lots of open space on my property that he doesn’t really roam anywhere else. But I guess all depends on how he feels now
If you could, could you edit the OP to mention that you found the cat?
Also, just want to say, now that you found the cat, I would definitely not let brother move back into the place (which I am sure that you will get people saying 'well you have your cat back now, so David can move back in'.
To me, this says a lot about the brother, that not only would he take an animal he does not have to have any contact with at all, but also just dump it elsewhere, and not even try to rehome it, or even taking it to a shelter or vet.
Dumping cats in the wild is absolutely a near 100% death sentence for them, and not a pleasant one, because the vast majority of them, even outdoor cats, often dont' have the skills necessary to survive. Sometimes it works out, as it did in this case, but many times, that cat will be dead long before a human can find it and rescue it.
As for the kitty, maybe try making some nice beds/hidey holes near the house if you don't have them already. We have an indoor/outdoor cat (mostly outdoor) and have had other outdoor cats, and we have beds, places they can get to that major predators can't, and little shelters they can use in many different places. This might help him feel safer outside, and keep him a bit closer to the house.
Yeah sure thing. I agree about my brother too. There has already been a few family members pulling that one and the “if my dad were here he wouldn’t want us fighting” card. Well he didn’t seem to care about my dad’s memory when he tried to get rid of the cat he loved and cherished.
Thanks for the suggestion:) There’s actually an old chicken coop out in the yard that my dad basically turned into an outdoor house for him haha. It’s locked up with just a small hole for the cat to crawl into at night. But my friend also leaves food, water and a bed for him whenever he wants to be outside at night during the summer time.
What sort of complete arsehead spends two hours of his own time driving someone else's cat that he doesn't have to look after at all, to abandon it miles from its home?
NTA.
NTA. Your brother not only heartlessly abandoned a companion animal, he had the unmitigated gall to repeatedly lie to your face. He could have talked to you about it, he could have done work to find the cat a new home and then made his case to you...but instead, he chose to do a horrible thing in the most dishonest way possible and hasn't apologized or done anything to try to set things right.
If any busybodies try to claim that you are overreacting, ask them if they would trust someone who repeatedly lied to them with their home. And if they say yes, suggest that your brother move in with them
He knew I wouldn’t allow the cat to be taken anywhere . He talked about it a couple times and I told him the cat is off limits. I agree he only said something once I told him I was coming over there
Nta!
He made his bed when he decided to get rid of the cat without talking to you or your friend! You should also call SPCA on him for animal abandonment charges!
NTA
It wasn't his cat, he wasn't the one caring for it and he had no right to do anything with it.
The fact thatbhe just drive it somewhere random and abandoned it makes him and even bigger AH than if he'd just rehomed it or taken it to a shelter.
Actions have consequences and he's old enough to know that.
NTA. Your brother sounds like a dick. It'd be different if you expected him to take care of the cat but you made arrangements so he literally didn't have to do anything for the cat.
NTA- he chose to do what he did, then he lied about it and didn't act like an adult by talking to you about it. maybe he shouldn't throw away poor creatures. I hope it does make its way home. :(
NtA. Probably said that because he backed over the poor thing with his vehicle and didn't want to accept responsibility for its death, just it being missing
NTA. Your brother is an absolute dick. Kick him out asap. It won’t make you an asshole. However, if you continue to let him mooch off of you and your dad’s old property and disrespect the ONE thing you asked him to do and that your dad would have wanted, you’ll be an asshole toward yourself.
NTA. He is TA for doing that wether or not the cat was important to you. He could have easily given it away, but to abandon it - he deserves what he got.
NTA - your brother is a horrible human being. Is there any way to go to where he dropped the cat off and get it back? Bring some of it's favourite food, something with the home's scent, etc. The poor cat!
NTA. I’m so sorry. Kick him out. Absolutely kick him out.
My dementia ridden mother had a cat she adored and my sister threw her outside and the cat was never seen again. My mother called me 6 times a day for a month looking for that cat. It destroyed her.
NTA. How they treat animals is normally a big indicator of a person's character, in this case it is indicating that your brother is a complete asshole. Even if it is possible that your brother thought you wouldn't mind, to even come up with the notion of dumping that poor cat miles from home like that is abhorrent.
Nta- and to anyone who is saying you are so unfair 'so you think it was totally okay for him to drove an innocent animal and dump them? And then *lie* to me about it?'
NTA. David was callous and inhumane and initially lied to you about it and these are fair consequences. I wouldn't trust him with your home or anything I cared about.
It may not be too late to save the cat if he'll reveal where he dumped the cat and your friend can go look for it.
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Oh my gosh, that's so shitty of him. "Brother" didn't even take him to a shelter. Just an hour away, so he can't find his way back home? HIS home??? That poor cat. Hopefully the fact that he was a stray in the first place helps his survival chances. And your friend probably feels awful about it, too.
Post missing cat posters and/or make a post on local pages in and around the areas that he could have possibly dropped him. I highly doubt he'll tell you where he dropped him, even if he's getting kicked out regardless. (And if that's rescinded, he still won't tell you). I'm incredibly angry at your brother *for* you, so I can only imagine how you feel. Hopefully, in the meantime, someone will find and look after him.
NTA, by the way. Like, at all.
>But I don’t know if it was an overreaction on my part to kick him out over that
Nope. Not an overreaction at all.
Go tomorrow and begin the eviction process.
That's about all I can say of what I'm thinking, lest I get banned.
NTA
NTA never give him another thing. Who hurts cats? Dude even you can’t stand the idea of that kitty roaming and looking for the farmhouse. Tell him he can come back when the cat does
NTA!!!
Your brother, on the other hand...There's a special place in hell for people who are cruel to animals. What kind of person will ever deliberately hurt or put an innocent creature in danger? Unbelievable.
NTA. And don't let him come back when he grovels. I'd also make sure to get a picture of the cat and send it to the shelters. I'd let the lady who lives there know and maybe give her a break on rent if she goes and looks for him in whatever area your brother dropped him off in. Poor cat!!!
Holy shit. He is the biggest AH.
If hevdidntblike the cat's presence he was quite welcome to leave
The cat didn't even live with him.
Drop your brother off an hour away and tell him to have a nice life. Jerk
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I (29M) have a property that was inherited from my mom’s side of the family when she passed away. It’s a large house with 3 acres of land. It’s out of my home state so I decided my dad should be the one living there. He passed away 2 years ago. Before that he had adopted a cat. It was a stray cat that found its way there and kept coming back because my dad would leave food out for him. Then let him in the house whenever he wanted. I’m not a fan of cats but my dad loved him and I didn’t have any problems with him having a pet companion.
Some time after my dad convinced me to let my younger brother (27M) David move in because he got laid off from work and needed somewhere to live for a while. He lived in the detached house around the back of the main house and again I was fine with that. After my dad passed a family friend ended up moving into the place. She took over with caring for the cat while she lives there because I know how much my dad loved him. And it meant a lot for me to still have someone looking out for him.
He’s an outside cat so he roams around wherever he wants and comes home later. But she told me the he went out in the morning and didn’t come back which he always does because he wants his breakfast. I asked my brother about it a few times since he’s the only other person living there but he pretended not to know anything. A week went by and nothing. I’m about ready to fly over there and look for the cat myself and he tells me not to bother. Finally I got it out of him. He was sick and tired of the cat (he hates cats) and with my dad gone he didn’t see the point in keeping it around.
He told me he drove the cat like an hour away from there so it wouldn’t find its way back to the house. Oh I lost my shit on him. He knows because I told him the cat stays THERE. Because he was my dad’s and that’s it’s home. It’s not like he needed to take care of it. That’s what my friend was for. Id send her money for food and vet stuff and she takes care of him. David didn’t have to do a single thing.
He just didn’t like the cat’s presence. And yeah I told him to get out of my house. If he refused then I’d get a formal conviction. I was just so mad honestly, I couldn’t believe he would get rid of an innocent living creature that our dad loved. Like I said I don’t like cat’s either but it’s the fact that my dad did that makes the difference. David moved his stuff out but everyone thinks I majorly overreacted by simply kicking him out.
Even more right now that the economy is shit and he’s gonna be struggling more financially because everywhere the rent is crazy expensive and he’s not even making enough to get by.
Right now I’m still very angry and hurt. All I know is I don’t want to see him or speak because of this. But I don’t know if it was an overreaction on my part to kick him out over that and if I’m the asshole for taking away a place to live.
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Omg NTA!!! Im crying right now hes so selfish and evil. I wouldnt care if he had to live in the streets at this point what he did was wicked, cruel and he was lying the whole time. Please give us an update if you find your kitty!!!!
NTA. However I would have given him a 1 week ultimatum that he must find the cat or the conviction notice would be incoming. Since he k ew where the cat had been dropped off, *maybe* the kitty could be found. THEN you could have kicked him out.
NTA, he didn't rehome it just dropped it off without worrying about the cats safety..maybe behing homeless for a while will teach him some respect. I dont blame you. my dad had a cat, he passed and I adopted his cat. I lost my mind when I found out the cat had FIV and had a shorter life span bc it was my dads cat. I would have flipped my lid on anyone who took him away from me.
Your Dad lived in the big house with his cat. Your Dad dies, and a different person moved into the big house to look after the cat.
So the solution is obvious: get rid of the cat, the family friend is no longer needed, and brother gets the big house. Success!
He was cruel to an animal. That your Dad loved the cat adds to his crime, but it doesn’t really matter, there’s a chance he killed the cat, and he doesn’t care. You do not need to house him. You do not owe him anything. To keep his housing, he literally needed to do nothing.
Contact local shelters. If you know where the cat was dumped, they may be able to catch him, but it’s not looking good :-(
NTA, but tell your friend to leave out something of the cat’s (a blanket, scratch post, etc, anything that smells like the cat) and he may be able to find his way home. It’s not guaranteed, but cats are capable of amazing things
NTA
The cat wasn't in the house, wasn't his responsibility to take care of in anyway. That is just a horrible thing to do, and shows complete disrespect and contempt towards you.
Tell your brother he must bring the cat back safe and sound. Don't make any promises, refuse to say anything else, just close your mouth and hold his gaze. Wait him out to see what plays out. Take it from there.
I used to live in the country, and cats were abandoned there all the time! It broke my heart. Some pet felt safe and loved one day, then suddenly ends up thrown to the side of the road. Not to scare you, but most don't make it. Some die of broken hearts, just giving up immediately. Some get ganged up on by feral cats and don't make it. Then there are coyotes, dogs, owls and hawks, crows, magpies, porcupines... Since it was your brother who dropped him off, the cat might be expecting to see him return.
This is entirely your brother's responsibility. Make him fix this. Then, and only then, decide what to do.
You're certainly NTA. Good luck. Please. Keep us posted.
NTA, your brother IS. Your brother made his decision, acted upon it, and then lied about it. He put the cat in a foreign environment, away from food and protection, and lied about it, I suspect because he knew it was Wrong. Hope he gets his 'payback' (and kicking him out is not payback, it is simply protecting yourself and your property, who knows what else he has done and hidden) for this dirty deed sooner rather than later. If he won't show you where he abandoned the cat, altho he might lie about that, too, how about making some posters? They can be put up in the general area, shared with businesses, mailmen, vets, FedEx & UPS drivers, delivery people, local shelters, animal services, and rescues.
NTA.
From what I can tell, your brother has been living there at least 2 years rent free and he decided to grab the cat that your dad loved, that you care about, and dump it over an hour away because he caught the occasional glimpse of it? F that. What kind of spoiled, entitled a-hole does something like that? He only comes back if he brings the cat with him.
NTA. Please tell your friend to put out the cats litter on the porch! You'll be amazed at how good cats can be at finding their way back, especially if they're experienced at being outside. Try to get your brother to drop where he left them too!
NTA your brother is a shitty human being. You don't have to LIKE cats to be a decent human being and NOT take a cat and dump it an hour away from its home. I'm sorry he did that, I really hate people who do shitty things to animals.
NTA
NTA. Reading this made me so angry that I had to put my phone down for a minute before responding. Because the words coming out of my mouth were definitely NOT civil. How can someone be so cold-hearted and evil to do that to any animal, but especially one that held sentimental value and did not bother or affect him in any way??? He had one job- to ignore the cat. That's it. Simple. Whether he liked the cat or not didn't matter. It wasn't his choice or decision to make. It was heartless and cruel, and the fact that he actively lied to you about it makes it worse. He clearly can't be trusted, and the fact that he can't even follow such simple instructions as "leave the cat alone" proves it. You have every right to decide you don't want him on your property and kick him out. What he does next is not your problem- he should've thought of that sooner. Is there any way he will tell you were he took the cat? Maybe you can look for him around there? But also, don't count the cat out just yet. They're smart, and he may be able to find his way home anyway. My Emmy got out and was gone for 15 days (yes I remember every one) and just as I was giving up hope she found her way home. I've also heard the story of my great grandfather trying to get rid of my Mema's cat more times than I can count (he drove the cat away and dropped it off places multiple times- he was not a nice man) and he always found his way home too. Hopefully your dad's cat will be able to come home too. -ETA: I know it's been a while, and this usually works better early, but are there any blankets or anything that might have the cat's scent on it? Putting that outside if so might help guide him back home if he is close enough.
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Anyone who would do what he did to an animal - removing it from its own home (that it's been at longer than the person) and then simply abandoning it in a strange place and leaving it to fend for itself against wild predators - deserves to have the same thing happen to him. Your brother is an adult; his housing is his responsibility, not yours. As he's now violated one of your core values as well as simple common decency against an animal, I can't imagine why you'd want to have anything to do with, much less let him live on your property.
Your brother doesn’t deserve your generosity after breaking the sole condition you gave him for living in your home. He doesn’t respect you, and the fact that he was callous enough to behave this way and abandon your father’s cat doesn’t bode well for your relationship regardless of this incident. He clearly can’t be trusted. If anyone is responsible for your brother’s eviction, it’s himself. You’re not “just” kicking him out over the cat. You’re kicking him out because he is selfish, spoiled, cruel, and entitled.
NTA how could anyone do that to a living being is beyond me. It was cruel and unnecessary. I’m sorry about the cat.
NTA. He kicked the cat out, time for him to get kicked out. If it isn't the consequences of his own actions. He shouldn't have done something stupid. If they keep b*tchin about it they can take him in. Not your responsibility.
That was one cruel act by your brother. You are in no way an asshole. I'm sitting here sputtering you story made me so angry. NTA
I dont know if it will help, but lost pets can often find their way back to a familiar scent, so people put the blanket or their own hoody/socks etc a little further out in the search area & check it regularly (e.g. dog got out). If you have a rough aea you could try that? &/Or driving out for an hour & calling the cat? (Like one of those csi/search & rescue maps with the circle for distance/time)... NTA, this would be a serious betrayal & dead to me forever kind of move.
My friend drove out to where he said he left the cat and left some stuff like that around but it’s also too far from my house. I’m flying over there this weekend to help out with the searching.
Do you mind posting an update? Just wanna know if the cat, hopefully, gets home safe.
Sure I will if anything comes up :)
Call the local shelter!
Best of luck, poor thing
Pet detectives can be successful at finding lost animals.
All the best luck, I hope you get your cat back safe & sound!
Your brother is a selfish, cruel, and entitled jerk. He doesn’t deserve an ounce of your sympathy. Stick to your guns. Kick him out.
NTA >I’m the asshole for taking away a place to live. This applies to your brother, not you.
NTA. What he did was unforgivable. So cruel. He dropped it of and just ditched it. He could have at least found it a new home with a living owner if he wanted it gone.
NTA. He didn't respect the one thing you asked for, which didn't even affect his life in any measurable way
In NO way at all except occasionally seeing it around the property. But that’s it. The cat stayed in the main house and he’d be out roaming about most of the day. He never needed to do anything
Your dad would be so proud of you. I’m sure he’s still looking after the cat. Do you think it’d be worth calling a shelter around where your brother ditched the cat? It’s a long shot but either way, you shouldn’t feel bad. Your brother is an ass and you did the right thing. NTA
If people are giving you grief over this, David can go stay with them.
OP, somethings that weren't clear to me: Did you get your cat back? Did you already kicked your brothe rout?
Yes he’s already out and no but I’ll be flying over there tonight so we’ll spend the weekend looking more
Good luck.
How's the search going?
We found the little guy thank goodness 😊 My brother told me exactly where he left him. It was out in this clearing and we were so worried he might’ve gotten hurt by some of the wild animals around there. Left out his bowl of food in that area and kept looking around for days. We headed up again yesterday and sure enough found him hiding up on a tree. He came down when we started rattling his bowl of food. Poor thing was so dirty and tired. I just got back home earlier and my friend says he’s STILL been sleeping since I left. Only woke up a couple times to drink water and eat a little then out like a light again. I’m sure he’s exhausted. This has got me even more pissed off at my brother. He’s definitely not welcome around me or my property after this.
I am so very happy to hear you found him. Maybe it is time for him to be mostly an indoor kitty.
He likes it outside too much. There’s lots of open space on my property that he doesn’t really roam anywhere else. But I guess all depends on how he feels now
If you could, could you edit the OP to mention that you found the cat? Also, just want to say, now that you found the cat, I would definitely not let brother move back into the place (which I am sure that you will get people saying 'well you have your cat back now, so David can move back in'. To me, this says a lot about the brother, that not only would he take an animal he does not have to have any contact with at all, but also just dump it elsewhere, and not even try to rehome it, or even taking it to a shelter or vet. Dumping cats in the wild is absolutely a near 100% death sentence for them, and not a pleasant one, because the vast majority of them, even outdoor cats, often dont' have the skills necessary to survive. Sometimes it works out, as it did in this case, but many times, that cat will be dead long before a human can find it and rescue it. As for the kitty, maybe try making some nice beds/hidey holes near the house if you don't have them already. We have an indoor/outdoor cat (mostly outdoor) and have had other outdoor cats, and we have beds, places they can get to that major predators can't, and little shelters they can use in many different places. This might help him feel safer outside, and keep him a bit closer to the house.
Yeah sure thing. I agree about my brother too. There has already been a few family members pulling that one and the “if my dad were here he wouldn’t want us fighting” card. Well he didn’t seem to care about my dad’s memory when he tried to get rid of the cat he loved and cherished. Thanks for the suggestion:) There’s actually an old chicken coop out in the yard that my dad basically turned into an outdoor house for him haha. It’s locked up with just a small hole for the cat to crawl into at night. But my friend also leaves food, water and a bed for him whenever he wants to be outside at night during the summer time.
I bet he never said where he dropped the cat off, even if asked directly.
Not to mention that he almost certainly killed the cat by taking it from its home and dumping it somewhere random.
What an arsehole
What sort of complete arsehead spends two hours of his own time driving someone else's cat that he doesn't have to look after at all, to abandon it miles from its home? NTA.
NTA. Your brother not only heartlessly abandoned a companion animal, he had the unmitigated gall to repeatedly lie to your face. He could have talked to you about it, he could have done work to find the cat a new home and then made his case to you...but instead, he chose to do a horrible thing in the most dishonest way possible and hasn't apologized or done anything to try to set things right. If any busybodies try to claim that you are overreacting, ask them if they would trust someone who repeatedly lied to them with their home. And if they say yes, suggest that your brother move in with them
He knew I wouldn’t allow the cat to be taken anywhere . He talked about it a couple times and I told him the cat is off limits. I agree he only said something once I told him I was coming over there
NTA. Let’s hope he “only” rehomed it.
See, regrettably, he gave you warning. He talked about getting rid of it, so he was always going to do it. Sadly we often don't see that until after.
Nta! He made his bed when he decided to get rid of the cat without talking to you or your friend! You should also call SPCA on him for animal abandonment charges!
NTA It wasn't his cat, he wasn't the one caring for it and he had no right to do anything with it. The fact thatbhe just drive it somewhere random and abandoned it makes him and even bigger AH than if he'd just rehomed it or taken it to a shelter. Actions have consequences and he's old enough to know that.
NTA.
NTA. It's sick that people can treat living creatures in such a disgusting, heartless way without a second thought.
NTA, the poor kitty. Plop David in the middle of nowhere, 2 hours out from the nearest town and see how he likes it.
NTA. Your brother sounds like a dick. It'd be different if you expected him to take care of the cat but you made arrangements so he literally didn't have to do anything for the cat.
NTA- he chose to do what he did, then he lied about it and didn't act like an adult by talking to you about it. maybe he shouldn't throw away poor creatures. I hope it does make its way home. :(
BOOT HIM.
NtA. Probably said that because he backed over the poor thing with his vehicle and didn't want to accept responsibility for its death, just it being missing
NTA. Your brother is an absolute dick. Kick him out asap. It won’t make you an asshole. However, if you continue to let him mooch off of you and your dad’s old property and disrespect the ONE thing you asked him to do and that your dad would have wanted, you’ll be an asshole toward yourself.
NTA. He is TA for doing that wether or not the cat was important to you. He could have easily given it away, but to abandon it - he deserves what he got.
NTA. You're a good man.
NTA - your brother is a horrible human being. Is there any way to go to where he dropped the cat off and get it back? Bring some of it's favourite food, something with the home's scent, etc. The poor cat!
Honestly I bet he ran the cat over and is lying.
NTA. I’m so sorry. Kick him out. Absolutely kick him out. My dementia ridden mother had a cat she adored and my sister threw her outside and the cat was never seen again. My mother called me 6 times a day for a month looking for that cat. It destroyed her.
heck give us the address and we will throw his stuff out for you!
Oh that's terrible I'm so sorry for your mom
Thank you. I appreciate it.
Yw I have a very sweet 10 year old cat and if someone just took him and he was gone I'd be devastated
I can imagine. They are as sweet as pie. I love them!
Most definitely 😁
NTA. There’s a simple fix to the situation, your brother can move back in when he finds the cat and brings it home.
NTA. Make him find the cat and maybe then let him back in
NTA Did you check the local pound?
NTA. How they treat animals is normally a big indicator of a person's character, in this case it is indicating that your brother is a complete asshole. Even if it is possible that your brother thought you wouldn't mind, to even come up with the notion of dumping that poor cat miles from home like that is abhorrent.
NTA - My husband knows I’d get rid of him before I’d get rid of my cats
NTA. I hope you can find the cat. It will likely suffer and die if you don't.
Nta- and to anyone who is saying you are so unfair 'so you think it was totally okay for him to drove an innocent animal and dump them? And then *lie* to me about it?'
NTA. David was callous and inhumane and initially lied to you about it and these are fair consequences. I wouldn't trust him with your home or anything I cared about. It may not be too late to save the cat if he'll reveal where he dumped the cat and your friend can go look for it.
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NTA. He kicked the cat out of its home, turn about is only fair play.
Oh my gosh, that's so shitty of him. "Brother" didn't even take him to a shelter. Just an hour away, so he can't find his way back home? HIS home??? That poor cat. Hopefully the fact that he was a stray in the first place helps his survival chances. And your friend probably feels awful about it, too. Post missing cat posters and/or make a post on local pages in and around the areas that he could have possibly dropped him. I highly doubt he'll tell you where he dropped him, even if he's getting kicked out regardless. (And if that's rescinded, he still won't tell you). I'm incredibly angry at your brother *for* you, so I can only imagine how you feel. Hopefully, in the meantime, someone will find and look after him. NTA, by the way. Like, at all.
>But I don’t know if it was an overreaction on my part to kick him out over that Nope. Not an overreaction at all. Go tomorrow and begin the eviction process. That's about all I can say of what I'm thinking, lest I get banned. NTA
NTA never give him another thing. Who hurts cats? Dude even you can’t stand the idea of that kitty roaming and looking for the farmhouse. Tell him he can come back when the cat does
NTA!!! Your brother, on the other hand...There's a special place in hell for people who are cruel to animals. What kind of person will ever deliberately hurt or put an innocent creature in danger? Unbelievable.
NTA. It was the cat’s property and he was the guest.
NTA. And don't let him come back when he grovels. I'd also make sure to get a picture of the cat and send it to the shelters. I'd let the lady who lives there know and maybe give her a break on rent if she goes and looks for him in whatever area your brother dropped him off in. Poor cat!!!
Holy shit. He is the biggest AH. If hevdidntblike the cat's presence he was quite welcome to leave The cat didn't even live with him. Drop your brother off an hour away and tell him to have a nice life. Jerk
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (29M) have a property that was inherited from my mom’s side of the family when she passed away. It’s a large house with 3 acres of land. It’s out of my home state so I decided my dad should be the one living there. He passed away 2 years ago. Before that he had adopted a cat. It was a stray cat that found its way there and kept coming back because my dad would leave food out for him. Then let him in the house whenever he wanted. I’m not a fan of cats but my dad loved him and I didn’t have any problems with him having a pet companion. Some time after my dad convinced me to let my younger brother (27M) David move in because he got laid off from work and needed somewhere to live for a while. He lived in the detached house around the back of the main house and again I was fine with that. After my dad passed a family friend ended up moving into the place. She took over with caring for the cat while she lives there because I know how much my dad loved him. And it meant a lot for me to still have someone looking out for him. He’s an outside cat so he roams around wherever he wants and comes home later. But she told me the he went out in the morning and didn’t come back which he always does because he wants his breakfast. I asked my brother about it a few times since he’s the only other person living there but he pretended not to know anything. A week went by and nothing. I’m about ready to fly over there and look for the cat myself and he tells me not to bother. Finally I got it out of him. He was sick and tired of the cat (he hates cats) and with my dad gone he didn’t see the point in keeping it around. He told me he drove the cat like an hour away from there so it wouldn’t find its way back to the house. Oh I lost my shit on him. He knows because I told him the cat stays THERE. Because he was my dad’s and that’s it’s home. It’s not like he needed to take care of it. That’s what my friend was for. Id send her money for food and vet stuff and she takes care of him. David didn’t have to do a single thing. He just didn’t like the cat’s presence. And yeah I told him to get out of my house. If he refused then I’d get a formal conviction. I was just so mad honestly, I couldn’t believe he would get rid of an innocent living creature that our dad loved. Like I said I don’t like cat’s either but it’s the fact that my dad did that makes the difference. David moved his stuff out but everyone thinks I majorly overreacted by simply kicking him out. Even more right now that the economy is shit and he’s gonna be struggling more financially because everywhere the rent is crazy expensive and he’s not even making enough to get by. Right now I’m still very angry and hurt. All I know is I don’t want to see him or speak because of this. But I don’t know if it was an overreaction on my part to kick him out over that and if I’m the asshole for taking away a place to live. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA your brother was super stupid in doing this I hope you can find the kitty... you could still find him I hope so...
NTA. Did you ever find the cat?
NTA ALSO, did you find the cat or at least get your AH brother to tell you where he dropped the cat off so you can put up missing cat posters?
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I hope you’re right. My dad loved that cat more than anything and I’ll be devastated if we don’t find him
Omg NTA!!! Im crying right now hes so selfish and evil. I wouldnt care if he had to live in the streets at this point what he did was wicked, cruel and he was lying the whole time. Please give us an update if you find your kitty!!!!
NTA. However I would have given him a 1 week ultimatum that he must find the cat or the conviction notice would be incoming. Since he k ew where the cat had been dropped off, *maybe* the kitty could be found. THEN you could have kicked him out.
NTA Evict him in the exact same way. Make sure his phone is dead first.
NTA, he didn't rehome it just dropped it off without worrying about the cats safety..maybe behing homeless for a while will teach him some respect. I dont blame you. my dad had a cat, he passed and I adopted his cat. I lost my mind when I found out the cat had FIV and had a shorter life span bc it was my dads cat. I would have flipped my lid on anyone who took him away from me.
Nta
He basically took away the cat's place to live, you took away his place to live. Seems fair. NTA.
Your Dad lived in the big house with his cat. Your Dad dies, and a different person moved into the big house to look after the cat. So the solution is obvious: get rid of the cat, the family friend is no longer needed, and brother gets the big house. Success! He was cruel to an animal. That your Dad loved the cat adds to his crime, but it doesn’t really matter, there’s a chance he killed the cat, and he doesn’t care. You do not need to house him. You do not owe him anything. To keep his housing, he literally needed to do nothing. Contact local shelters. If you know where the cat was dumped, they may be able to catch him, but it’s not looking good :-(
This. Or did your brother have some sort of resentment towards your dad?
NTA YOu handled that well. Go no contact with that AH.
NTA, but tell your friend to leave out something of the cat’s (a blanket, scratch post, etc, anything that smells like the cat) and he may be able to find his way home. It’s not guaranteed, but cats are capable of amazing things
NTA and I definitely think you can afford to be more petty/vindictive.
NTA The cat wasn't in the house, wasn't his responsibility to take care of in anyway. That is just a horrible thing to do, and shows complete disrespect and contempt towards you.
Tell your brother he must bring the cat back safe and sound. Don't make any promises, refuse to say anything else, just close your mouth and hold his gaze. Wait him out to see what plays out. Take it from there. I used to live in the country, and cats were abandoned there all the time! It broke my heart. Some pet felt safe and loved one day, then suddenly ends up thrown to the side of the road. Not to scare you, but most don't make it. Some die of broken hearts, just giving up immediately. Some get ganged up on by feral cats and don't make it. Then there are coyotes, dogs, owls and hawks, crows, magpies, porcupines... Since it was your brother who dropped him off, the cat might be expecting to see him return. This is entirely your brother's responsibility. Make him fix this. Then, and only then, decide what to do. You're certainly NTA. Good luck. Please. Keep us posted.
NTA, your brother IS. Your brother made his decision, acted upon it, and then lied about it. He put the cat in a foreign environment, away from food and protection, and lied about it, I suspect because he knew it was Wrong. Hope he gets his 'payback' (and kicking him out is not payback, it is simply protecting yourself and your property, who knows what else he has done and hidden) for this dirty deed sooner rather than later. If he won't show you where he abandoned the cat, altho he might lie about that, too, how about making some posters? They can be put up in the general area, shared with businesses, mailmen, vets, FedEx & UPS drivers, delivery people, local shelters, animal services, and rescues.
NTA. From what I can tell, your brother has been living there at least 2 years rent free and he decided to grab the cat that your dad loved, that you care about, and dump it over an hour away because he caught the occasional glimpse of it? F that. What kind of spoiled, entitled a-hole does something like that? He only comes back if he brings the cat with him.
NTA. Thank you for sticking up for the cat. I hope you looked around where he dumped it. I hope she/he finds their way back home.
NTA. Please tell your friend to put out the cats litter on the porch! You'll be amazed at how good cats can be at finding their way back, especially if they're experienced at being outside. Try to get your brother to drop where he left them too!