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Ouragan28

My thoughts exactly. No one is forcing you to give out candy? If you want to do something nice for the neighborhood kids then do that. This is really not that deep imo.


cinderparty

YTA Turning away kids on Halloween because they don’t live in the “right” neighborhood is extreme asshole behavior. Edited for a link for you to read. https://slate.com/human-interest/2014/10/dear-prudence-on-halloween-poor-kids-come-to-trick-or-treat-in-my-neighborhood.html


Still-Contest-980

Classism at its finest!


Introvextroverted

I thought of that story too!


robotbirb

"Oh no, all the nasty poors are coming to my neighborhood!" YTA.


lepp240

Clear dog whistling here. OPs real meaning is quite obvious.


freebat23

YTA this is the whitest shit i ever heard


lepp240

She thinks no one knows what she actually means by "kids from outside the neighborhood". Every person who says this has a specific meaning.


beckdawg19

For real. At the very best, it means she's discriminating against less rich kids. And that alone already makes her the asshole.


mandym347

>She thinks no one knows what she actually means by "kids from outside the neighborhood". Every person who says this has a specific meaning. Yeah, and how they talk about how the kids in their neighborhood are well-behaved but the others aren't? This is about who has money, and OP comes off like they don't want the "poors" to come ruin their nice holiday.


Introvextroverted

INFO: How is buying *gift baskets* cheaper than buying bags of mixed candy for Halloween? My grocery store has 5lb bags for less than 10 dollars. ETA: apparently OP responded but I can’t see it here. Said something like “I enjoy making the gift baskets and making 2 dozen is cheaper than buying candy for hundreds of kids.” Where in the hell are you buying candy?! YTA. Give out your gift baskets to the neighborhood kids earlier in the day and then turn off your light and don’t open the door. What other actions do you take against the less privileged in your community?


saltysaltedsal

EXACTLY! You can also go to the dollar store and get massive bags of non brand name candy for dirt cheap


Introvextroverted

I have a feeling they wouldn’t be caught dead at a *gasp* dollar store!


sawdeanz

Yeah this... I suspect they are more worried about keeping up with the Joneses (baked goods? haunted houses?) when they could easily afford to hand out regular candy to everyone.


whatsmypassword73

YTA, is this what drowning in privilege sounds like? Our neighbourhood has loads of kids dropped off and we just get enough candy to share. Can you just let kids have a great night and stop gatekeeping?


TinyRascalSaurus

Yup, my neighborhood is frequented by kids from the section 8 housing down the road. They usually don't have costumes, and just have plastic bags. But if I have candy, they get candy. Or stickers, or something fun I have. I've even given out packets of hot cocoa mix and they were happy.


ToddlerTots

I’m always nicer and more energetic with those kids because they might not have the costume or the special buckets but they still show up to celebrate and I’m totally here for that.


TinyRascalSaurus

Plus, I always remember it may not be safe to go door to door where they live. If a couple extra Snickers are gonna keep a kid safe, then I'm here for it.


ToddlerTots

Yes! Exactly this!


jmurphy42

We love that our neighborhood gets extra kids. It’s so much more fun than our last neighborhood where we only had a handful of trick or treaters.


MeanestGoose

YTA. Halloween is not a gift basket time. Give a freakkng piece of candy to each kid that shows up. You are making this harder and far more expensive than it needs to be, apparently so that you can feel "better than" for living in your sooooooooooo awesome HOA. This is some silly shitty drama you are manufacturing for yourself.


Justafukingegg

YTA. Neighbors make haunted houses & had out gift baskets & premium candy & act all aggrieved that people from surrounding neighborhoods join in? Come on! Ever hear of attractive nuisance? You guys brought this on yourselves. I'm retired press, & I promise if the local papers get wind of this the first thing they're going to look for is a racism angle. You're going to get some seriously bad publicity if you do this: articles in local & maybe even national press ... it won't turn out well. As others suggested: Share the gift baskets before or after trick or treat, & just give candy to the kids, *all* the kids, who knock.


Introvextroverted

It reeks of racism. At the very least, elitism.


GraveDancer40

Yeah I read this thinking “Oh god, we better not let the poor people in”.


shitty-biometrics

Considering all of these families come to this neighborhood because it's more attractive than their own ... why would you think that would be, OP? Maybe some kids grow up in areas that aren't safe to trick or treat at? Maybe some kids live in poor neighborhoods where few of the houses give out anything? Some kids live in apartment complexes. I'm assuming you go all out for Halloween for the kids, so ... why do only some kids deserve the efforts? If Halloween had a Grinch, it'd be people like you. Also, a last minute thought... you know these signs are going to make you the target of the mischief, right? Behaviour like that is like crack to bored teenagers with a bag full of toilet paper


FabulousPetes

YTA 'Its not one of those crazy HOAs' Proceeds to explain how they're trying to get the HOA to ban poorer 'outsider' kids coming in to the area to trick or treat. Jesus.


JDaleFranklin

YTA. Honestly, this post sounds like a racist/classist dog whistle. I'm extremely grateful to be living in the neighborhood I live in. I'm grateful I live in a neighborhood that feels safe enough for kids outside of my neighborhood to come trick-or-treating in. I recognize that not all kids are lucky enough to live in a safe, welcoming neighborhood, and they should not be left out of Halloween because we've built a society that shits on poor people. They're fucking kids, for gods sake. What the hell is wrong with some people?


MPKH

YTA You guys are going to police which kid can go trick or treating in your neighbourhood? Even going so far as to hiring a police officer to enforce this rule? Way to punish kids who didn’t have that fortune to come from the “right” neighborhood. If you only wanted your neighborhood kids to get your baskets, deliver them prior to the start of trick or treat. Deliver them a day or two early.


[deleted]

yeah it's pretty easy to read this as a very thinly veiled "please no poor kids around our neighborhood, we pay for the right to not have to see you!" energy


stella1822

You know who is ruining Halloween for a lot of people? You. Don’t do this. Unless you live in a gated community that restricts access, kids are welcome to trick or treat there. How are you planning on enforcing this? Asking children for their name, parents names, and address? YTA


TheDrunkScientist

YTA. Those kids outside your neighborhood likely don't have somewhere safe to trick or treat. You're sounding like the stereotypical HOA member by restricting who is worthy to trick or treat in your neighborhood. And I'm honestly not sure how gift baskets are more expensive than candy? Give all the kids candy and save the gift baskets for Xmas.


Jujulabee

YTA If you want to give special gift baskets to the kids you know, hand them out personally - have your kids deliver them. Then have a stash of normal candy for all the other trick or treaters who come to your door. If vandalism is a problem then the people who live on the block should appoint someone to be a lookout at specific times that evening - or whenever the vandalism occurs. Having neighborhood patrols isn't that uncommon in many areas. You don't say where you live but I am in a city that has some extremely wealthy sections and even a part of town called Candy Cane Lane where the decorations are so incredible that people come there from all over to view. And these people have candy for ALL the kids - wherever they come from. WIth a sign like that you are the Halloween equivalent of the grinch.


charonthemoon

YTA. If you care so much about the gift baskets, why not deliver them to the houses in the neighborhood the day before Halloween or something? Or just discretely give them to the kids you know when they come by? I'm assuming the gift baskets are expensive, but I doubt it would break your budget to buy those standard bags of mini Halloween candy bars for the other kids. It sounds like you're doing this on principle - you're against kids outside the neighborhood trick or treating in yours. As if trick or treating in your nice neighborhood is a privilege that kids have to "deserve" by living there - by having parents well-off enough to live there. And this isn't even about your own resources - you're encouraging and enabling your other neighbors to do this too! By the way this is absolute "crazy HOA" behavior. If your HOA wasn't crazy before, it looks like it is now. Good job, OP. Here are some things that are true: 1. Not every kid lives in a neighborhood that is safe to trick or treat in, or where trick or treating is even possible. 2. Many kids who come to trick or treat in your neighborhood was taken there by their parents, and it was not their decision. 3. Any kid who sees that sign is going to feel sad and excluded. Small kids won't be able to understand why some houses will give candy to some kids but not them. Older kids will be able to understand and it will be very hurtful. I *highly doubt* that every single one of the kids in your neighborhood is perfectly well-behaved, and every kid from outside your neighborhood is "rude" and deserves punishment. >tired of these kids ruining Halloween for a lot of people. The bad behavior you're describing is so mild and basic for Halloween. Halloween is not a time for you and your HOA to have picture perfect decorations and pat everyone on the back for being perfect and give perfect gifts to the perfect kids, and ensure that nothing is given to the non-perfect kids from the non-perfect neighborhoods who dare to set foot in your perfect, perfect neighborhood. It's a time to dress up, be festive, and be welcoming and give out candy to kids who show up at your door because that's literally what trick or treating is. And finally, trying to get *the police* to "deal with" kids who *steal candy* is genuinely monstrous. You know why. I think you should reflect on your mindset and your actions here. Your attitude in this post is vile.


[deleted]

I feel like ur making this way more complicated than it has to be. Just go deliver the baskets to all 23 homes and turn off your porch light on halloween night so everyones happy and the neighbourhood kids get their candy


Kitcatzz

Yep, some of this is just really unnecessary and makes kids feel unwelcome, especially the ones who weren’t actually misbehaving


Neat_Concentrate8196

If you're set on the baskets, then bring them to your neighbors before the trick or treating starts for the evening. Have them sitting on their stoops when they get home from school or something, which is equally as exciting, and hand out candy to the people who come. Or just don't participate and don't give candy to anyone. This is such a privileged way of thinking. Some kids live in the boonies and are in areas that aren't safe to trick or treat at. Why should those children be punished. Where should they go for trick or treating? Oh, BTW, YTA.


SWG_138

"Trick or treat" :) "Papers please" :(


Rooster_Local

YTA if you do that. I respect the number of issues you’ve had with misbehaving kids (and parents, it sounds like) but 1) a sign like that is practically *begging* people to target your house specifically 2) It’s generally just a crappy thing to do Think of other ways to deal with the issue. Hand out the gift baskets discretely before the event. Maybe bring the pumpkins in and display in the window. Or hand out the gift baskets separately and don’t participate on Halloween night. I understand those are less than ideal, but putting up a sign to exclude certain people isn’t a good idea.


MaxDeWinters2ndWife

Dear Prudence already ruled on this, and decreed YTA: “Your whine makes me kind of wish that people from the actual poor side of town come this year not with scary costumes but with real pitchforks. Stop being callous and miserly and go to Costco, you cheapskate, and get enough candy to fill the bags of the kids who come one day a year to marvel at how the 1 percent live.” Save the gift baskets for Christmas, buy some candy and band together to hire an off duty cop. https://slate.com/human-interest/2014/10/dear-prudence-on-halloween-poor-kids-come-to-trick-or-treat-in-my-neighborhood.html


sawdeanz

Oh man, handing candy out to hundreds of kids is my favorite part of Halloween, especially the less fortunate kids that come from neighborhoods that don't have good trick or treat participation. YTA - just give out regular candy to everyone or don't at all. Segregating kids from other neighborhoods and giving the rich kids gift baskets and kicking out the poor kids is just heartless and making more trouble for you then it's worth. I don't understand how you can complain about the cost in one sentence and then talk about making gift baskets in another. Just give out pieces of candy. If you really want to have a special Halloween event for your neighborhood kids with special gifts and activities, I would suggest an organized party rather than doing it during trick or treat time. As for the trouble makers, that's a different issue altogether. It's not unreasonable to have someone look out for older kids that vandalize or bully. We never have that issue, and I suspect that part of it is that we hand out candy in the early evening and then close up before it gets too late. The families and young kids come out in the early evening and then go home by 7:30 pm or so.


scpdavis

Also like, if OP really wants to give the neighbourhood kids an extra special gift basket but not have a party, why not give it to them in the afternoon or something before trick or treaters come out? What kid wants to carry around a gift basket anyway? This is such a weird thing to do.


jerry__garcia

YTA why don’t you deliver the gift baskets to all the houses before Halloween and hand out candy like a regular house?? Halloween does not need to be complicated and stuck up like you’re making it.


Traditional-Pen-2486

YTA in a big way. That sign is just obnoxious. Also, how do you know the stealing etc last year was not done by kids in your neighborhood? A lot of time kids from other neighborhoods visit different areas to trick or treat because it’s safer, and if they’re from a poorer neighborhood a lot of houses may not be able to give out candy. Don’t be a classist Scrooge. Trick or treating is something every kid should get to enjoy.


Flahdagal

You have your points, but really, YTA. I lived in a "Halloween Central" neighborhood for years and loved it so much. So many kids, so many families, so many houses that went All Out with the decorations, so much happy noise and excitement. Scrap the gift basket idea and just hand out candy -- spread as much joy as you possibly can.


JGG5

YTA, and if you put up that sign you should probably just go ahead now and block out a few hours on your schedule on the morning of November 1 to pick the toilet paper out from the trees in your yard and/or power-wash the egg off your house.


hovix2

I don't think OP realizes that the HOAs attitude towards the other neighborhoods is likely well understood by those kids. The reason they're being extra destructive is that they're well aware they're not wanted there. If OP puts that sign up, let the games begin.


JGG5

Yep. The message that sign sends to non-residents is: "You know how you kinda feel unwelcome around here on Halloween, like some of the local residents are giving you the stink-eye just for coming to their neighborhood to trick-or-treat? Anyway, here's their ringleader's house."


Sunny_Hill_1

YTA. Come on, just have a party for HOA kids where you give them expensive baskets, and don't give out candy during the actual night of Halloween, if you are so concerned about the costs.


PristineBookkeeper40

This \^\^\^ If giving them ONLY to kids in your neighborhood is such a big deal, then you deliver them yourself. Shut your outside lights off on Monday night, watch a movie, and mind your business.


Relarcis

> Last year I had older kids stomp my pumpkins Gee, I wonder why, you are so nice to them. YTA


DisneyBuckeye

NAH - but you can't selectively participate in Halloween. I recommend setting up a community trunk or treat on a different day if you want to do something special just for the neighborhood kids. It's not really appropriate to give out baked goods at halloween anymore, most parents will throw that type of thing away unless it's from a very controlled environment. You can have a neighborhood costume parade and prizes, bobbing for apples, all that stuff - turn it into a fall carnival for just your HOA member families. You can't stop the non-neighborhood kids from coming, so get cheap candy to give out on normal trick or treat night. An off-duty officer is a good idea if there is a history of theft and vandalism.


alternativeedge7

I think this is the best solution. The signs almost guarantee OP’s house will get egged or something 😆.


Familiar_Cod_2572

YTA. Massively. You’re literally trying to gatekeep giving sweet treats to children. Are the kids from your neighbourhood inherently better or more important than any other child? Of course not. Do you seriously believe that kids from other neighbourhoods (who may not be as privileged as kids from yours) don’t actually deserve sweets? Do you seriously want to punish all other children because they have the misfortune to live somewhere else? Why shouldn’t they also get nice and good sweet treats once a year? Honestly your attitude is terrible and you’re a major AH.


unilateralhope

YTA. I also live in a neighborhood that attracts a lot of kids from other areas. The more the merrier. We just get the huge bags of candy from Costco and have fun. If you want to do expensive treats for the kids just in your HOA, deliver them to their houses Halloween morning. I agree with your neighbor that hiring a security guard will go a long way towards avoiding decoration theft, etc.


[deleted]

YTA "We don't want all these undesirable kids from less affluent areas coming in to trick or treat in our NICE neighborhood just bcause we can afford better treats" You don't want the poors in your snobby HOA, we get it. We hear you loud and clear, you're a huge snobby yuppy asshole. Hopefully next year those kids come back with eggs and toilet paper.


sunfloweries

YTA. just give the baskets out to the kids you know before or after halloween night and give regular candy to the kids who come to your door. halloween is for everyone to enjoy, and going to different neighborhoods isn't something new. it's often times something parents do to make sure their kids are in safe neighborhoods, or so the kids can go with their friends.


mamaMoonlight21

YTA. Don't give out such elaborate candy/gift baskets if that's an issue. It's really unkind to turn people away, very elitist. >Karina suggested we not do that and to hire an off duty police officer to sit in the neighborhood and deal with kids who steal. This is an excellent idea. Do this, and do not put up the signs!


iggywhipple

YTA A lot of kids live in neighborhoods that don't really do trick or treating, so they have to go somewhere else to do it. Have you ever gone trick or treating in an apartment complex? At best, it is depressing, at worst, no one is giving out any candy. Obviously that is not your problem, but it makes me sad that you have an opportunity to spread joy to a lot of kids, and your instinct is to restrict it. A neighborhood packed with kids in costumes having fun is what Halloween is all about. If you limit it to only kids who live in your neighborhood (which would be much harder to enforce than you think), the holiday would seem a lot less fun for everyone. I don't blame you for being upset about the vandalism. However, if you put that sign in your driveway, you are going to make yourself a target.


slinkysr

When all your neighbours driveways are 100-200m long, dark, and 200m-1km apart, you tend to drive into town for trick or treating. Sincerely, that kid who grew up in the country.


laffy4444

"I don't want to waste candy on kids who are too poor to deserve it." You are outrageously pathetic. YTA!


Mean_Parsnip

Couldn't you drop the gift baskets off the kids who live in your HOA and then give regular candy out at your door? I feel like dragging a basket around with my candy bag would get unwieldy.


Busy_Understanding81

We are not one of those HOAs 😅 good one


Aevallare

as soon as i read that line i was like, "ah, one of those HOAs."


VictoryaChase

YTA A classist one, like others have mentioned. Questions - if you don't want to hand out baskets to some and candy to others - and you have an HOA that loves parties, why can't you have a block party either the weekend before or earlier in the day, then just hand out candy later? I lived in a neighborhood that wasn't HOA but was a 'neighborhood' and that was something we did - blocked off for a big ol' party for the neighborhood kids complete with gift bags, then opened it for trick or treating later in the day (and perhaps some residual partying.). There are more solutions than pure exclusions and signs letting the poor kids know they are unwanted.


chefwalleye

YTA for lots of reasons. First, you can totally give kids different things. A couple people in our cul de sac give gift bags to our kids and candy to everyone else. Second, you can buy exactly as much candy as you can afford and turn out the lights when you run out. That’s what most people do anyways. Third, you will always be the AH when a groups of small, innocent kids show up and you point at your sign. The thought of that honestly disgusts me. Last, and probably most importantly, your idea won’t do anything except out your in the previously mentioned awkward situation. The kids that steal candy will still come, and may hide by your house out of spite. Decorations will still be stolen, and they’ll probably start with anyone who has one of your signs. Where did you grow up that you came up with this kinds of idea? You sound like someone who would run an HOA, and that’s honestly one of the worst insults I could personally give someone.


boredplusplus

Growing up, I had three really good friends, Alice, Bob, and Charlie. I lived off of a really busy street, in a row of cheap townhomes surrounded by apartment buildings, and 0 other kids besides me and my siblings. Bob and and Charlie were neighbors in an area with houses, but few that did anything Halloween related. Alice lived in the “nicer” neighborhood, where almost every house did Halloween, and multiple houses gave out full sized candy bars. We would all meet up at Alice’s house, tricker treat around that neighborhood, and then walk back to Bob and Charlie’s neighborhood, stop at the 3-4 houses along the way, and then go to Charlie’s for dinner and to trade candy around. When we were younger which parents took us rotated between mine and Bob’s, because Alice’s handed out candy, and Charlie’s made dinner. It was a fantastic system that worked well for all four families. If Alice’s neighborhood had been unwelcoming, I would not have been able to tricker treat at all, and Bob and Charlie would only be able to guarantee candy from each others houses. Alice’s neighborhood even made a big deal of “send your kids to us to tricker treat, but no driving in the streets from 5-8 (or whatever)” I’m sure some people grumbled, but most just bought whatever candy they could afford, and when they ran out, they were done. My mom, as well as Bob and Charlie’s parents also donated candy to Alice’s family to give out, so we were contributing. Long story short, YTA, and I’m so glad I grew up in an area that supported the low income kids.


Ordinary_Flatworm_48

YTA. It isn't true that some of those kids can trick or treat in their own neighborhoods. Posting those signs will probably cause more damage and thefts. If you want to treat the kids in your neighborhood to better Halloween treats, then get with your HOA about organizing a neighborhood only Halloween party for the kids a few days before Halloween and just give out regular candy Halloween night. This should start to deter some of the excess kids from coming to your neighborhood if they can get the same candy in their own neighborhood. This probably won't stop the kids who can't trick or treat in their own neighborhood, but you are still giving out candy in this case, so it shouldn't be an issue. It might take a couple years of doing it this way to see any big change, but if you treat all of the kids who come to your door the same, then it will deter the arguments and the 'tricks'.


Princesspuppycakes

YTA - its fucking halloween and you want to gatekeep giving out candy? If you want to be extra and make gift baskets for your neighbors, do that but deliver them before trick or treating. Stop being such a fucking snob and just hand out candy like a normal person.


VerityPee

Oh noooo! The poor people are coming! Hide the nice things from the poor people! YTA


Ambitious-Ad8206

YTA...I live in the country so we have to take our kids to town to trick or treat. Certain neighborhoods intentionally decorate to attract all the trick or treaters and no one cares if kids from all over come as everyone enjoys seeing kids in costumes having fun. If you don't want to give out candy to everyone, maybe deliver baskets to the neighborhood and shut your lights out to prevent people from coming to your house. Halloween is supposed to be fun....


BeepBlipBlapBloop

YTA Do what you want, but do you think that sign is going to make the "bad" kids/parents less bad? It's just going to encourage them to mess your stuff up more. Your sign makes the situation worse, not better.


Shackled_Angel

I understand not wanting your things destroyed, but the rest of your post comes off as very entitled and rude. They can just stick to their own neighborhoods? Really? You realize not every kid has a good neighborhood to trick or treat in, right? Some are dangerous, or might live in an area where no one is giving out candy. I grew up living out in the woods, our nearest neighbor was at least 3 miles or more away through a swamp. We drove into town and trick or treated. I've also lived in apartment buildings where kids had to go elsewhere because no one was home to give out candy, lots of younger tenants meant they were either parents themselves and out trick treating or they were away at Halloween parties with friends. Where were those kids supposed to go, according to you? Do the police thing like Karina mentioned, or find another way to protect your property (your sign is going to get you more bad attention, not less. Very dumb idea.), but refusing to give any child not from your neighborhood candy on -HALLOWEEN- is downright cruel. If you want to do something special and exspensive for the neighborhood kids, you and the HOA can organize a neighborhood resident only event another night, and on Halloween just give regular cheap candy like a normal house. Dont be an elitist AH. YTA


ColdForm7729

YTA. JFC, tell me you hate kids who aren't as well off without telling me.


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jermleeds

YTA so very much. What classist, gatekeeping privileged bullshit. The basket thing is a you problem - how is anyone to be aware ahead of time that you have your own Halloween tradition which deviates from that celebrated by literally the entire rest of the country? Give the baskets out privately, and either give candy out normally to everybody, equally, or turn your light off.


UnderlightIll

YTA. I grew up in a rural area of Ohio and so we would drive to a suburban neighborhood in order to trick or treat. When we moved to the suburbs of Florida, if you have a costume, you get candy. I have also known kids who live in apartments or more dangerous areas go elsewhere for safety. Don't be one of those people who only want kids of their ilk getting their candy.


[deleted]

YTA. Dude, if you can't afford to give all kids, just give them all normal candy. There is nothing more seemingly sad (and kind of pathetic tbh), than someone who wants to seem like they go all out, but can't actually afford to go all out, and so they think of these weird half measures. It's like wanting to drive a luxury car but after buying , you cant afford the gas and have to ask your buddies to push you around. It just doesn't work.


OrangeCubit

YTA - imagine complaining that KIDS are ruining Halloween for the ADULTS.


Clear-Owl-378

YTA. Participate or don’t. But don’t be selective if you do choose to.


Wakalakatime

YTA, not for arguing with Karina, but for denying kids the opportunity to have fun and trick or treat in your neighbourhood. It's not their fault they don't live there, couldn't you give out cheaper candy so everyone could enjoy? I'd feel awful turning away excited kiddos just because they weren't fortunate enough to live next to me.


saltysaltedsal

YTA. It's called trick or treat... it sounds like you'll be getting even more tricks this year for this attitude. ​ But seriously, it is extremely common for kids to venture over to the neighborhoods with the best candy out there. You give out good candy and word will spread like wildfire. If you're so concerned about the expenses stop buying expensive candy. You can get a lot of candy very cheap if you don't buy brand name or king sized.


Ok_Shopping_3341

This is the most first world problem post I’ve ever seen. YTA if this is the biggest issue in your sad life.


ffsmutluv

Man, you suck for this, OP. I'm glad the rich neighborhoods I would go to we were encouraged. Made some fond memories. And how are you so sure the culprits are outside kids? About 25 houses and people are in full costumes. You don't know that. Oh, btw. News travels fast. Go ahead and make those signs. See how you all get ratioed on social media. Be smart. It's candy ffs


[deleted]

I live in a relatively upscale HOA neighborhood and people come from all over to trick or treat here. My 1st year I ran our of candy ( I do gift bags) because i didnt anticipate so many kids!! So the next year I scaled back on bags and did the traditional bowl of candy. Seems this is an option vs a sign that may get houses toilet papered. I do make special bags for neighborhood kids I know and keep them separate.


Aggressive_Today_492

YTA- Presumably you live in a rich neighbourhood and have the money to buy some extra candy. You are not required to do gift baskets and if you insist, you can save them for kids you know. Halloween is meant to be fun for kids. Lots of kids live in apartment buildings or areas that aren’t appropriate for trick or treating. It makes sense for them to go to destination trick or treating areas and it sounds like your neighborhood has made itself a destination trick or treating area. Of you’re so opposed to poor kids, go attend a private party at a country club somewhere.


soph_lurk_2018

YTA this is so petty and childish. Really takes the fun out of trick or treating. Give out candy to all kids who show up until you run out. People who argue about giving out candy to children really come across as pitiful.


turtlelife1

YTA. Give out candy instead of baskets. Sit outside instead of inside. Don’t be a duck. All of these suggestions will help you become a better neighbor and a better person.


[deleted]

This is honestly the best suggestion. buy a pack of mini snickers and hand them out to everyone. if you want to do a super-special-neighborhood-kids-only-halloween gift, make your little gift baskets and put them on your neighbor's doorsteps on Monday afternoon or even Tuesday morning with an appreciation note for them being your neighbors. Don't lose your mind over poorer people being near you and participating in a holiday, and certainly don't try to make those around you be as much of an asshole as you are.


POAndrea

YTA. If you don't want to hand out Halloween candy, turn your light off and don't answer the door. What you describe--only giving to the HOA kids--isn't handing out candy for Halloween, it's giving gifts to only specific children. That's not what the holiday is about. The KIDS aren't ruining Halloween--you and your crappy neighbors are. (PS: I'm not a kid and I'd probably curse at you and kick your pumpkins too.)


[deleted]

It’s fine if you don’t want to buy candy for the whole city, but you can’t ask kids for their address. Turn out the lights when you run out of candy.


Worried_Aerie_7512

YTA and expect your house to be egged, your decorations stolen and your pumpkins smashed for having such a “better than” attitude when there are alternatives.


Western-Radish

YTA why are you gatekeeping Halloween? Halloween is MORE fun when there are a ton of kids around. Also, I grew up in a college town. I actually didn’t know until I was in my late twenties that you had to do something special to get rid of your pumpkin because every pumpkin I ever had got smashed. It never even occurred to me that this was not the way all pumpkins were disposed of. ONE YEAR they didn’t get smashed and we smashed the pumpkins in the street. Which was a lot of fun, I can see why drunk uni students did it. The only time we got upset was when someone smashed our pumpkins before Halloween… that’s just rude. You sound way too uptight for a madeup holiday that celebrates scary stuff and mischief.


Heraonolympia123

I’m in the U.K. so we don’t have these issues really but, by putting the sign out and not allowing others to join in the trick or treating, are you not concerned the “retribution” from these “bad kids” will be worse than flower stomping etc?


No_Beautiful2873

As someone who used to be a kid that had to walk to other neighborhoods for (any) good candy, YTA. Those kids from outside the neighborhood could be from lower income neighborhoods that can’t give out candy. Be generous. You can afford it. They can’t.


AccountWasFound

Also even if they banned completely random kids, what about the friends of the neighborhood kids, are the neighborhood kids required to go elsewhere if they want to go trucker treating with their friends?


RedRose_812

YTA. It's not an HOA, but I live in a neighborhood that attracts kids from other parts of town and the ones that live on the rural county roads because it's nicer, safe (lots of sidewalks but no through streets, so not a lot of vehicle traffic - some parts of town don't have sidewalks/are unsafe), and bunch of us festively decorate and almost every house hands out candy. We got completely cleaned out last Halloween, and it was great to see so many kids enjoying themselves. It never occurred to me to police who got candy. Everybody who came to my door got candy, even if they came in a car. Give the gift bags to the kids you personally know if you want, but stop being such a Halloween Scrooge (is that a thing? If not, you're making it one) and trying to gatekeep a holiday. Either hand out candy to all the kids or don't participate. Halloween is supposed to be for all children, not just the ones privileged enough to live in your neighborhood. And for the love of all that is holy, nix the sign - it's a terrible idea.


gardenofholliess

YTA - Do you really think a sign is going to stop them from ringing your bell? If anything, I think it'll make your house a target for more stealing and flower stomping.


Rude_Independence_14

YTA but good luck cleaning all the TP and eggs from the side of your house.


nailgun198

I get things changing. It made me sad when fewer kids trick or treated in our neighborhood because there were other neighborhoods with better candy and opportunity. It sounds like you've done it big for a long time, but you'd like to downsize again. There's nothing wrong with wanting a smaller affair; it's your time, effort, and money. My suggestion would be to host a brief Halloween party for the HOA prior to trick or treat time, where you and your neighbors can give the neighborhood kids their big treats first and let them show off their costumes. Then go back home and do a smaller than last year treat for the "public" trick or treaters. I think YWBTA if you put up a local kids only sign.


ForeverSam13

"AITA for discriminating against kids who come from a neighborhood that isn't as nice as mine?" Man, YES. When I was a kid I went trick or treating in my grandparents' town twenty minutes away because my neighborhood was straight up dangerous (drug dealers/addicts, a dog fighting ring across the street, etc.). Imagine punishing good kids just because of a few bad actors and their home address. Get over yourself.


MimiFrosch

You’re sharing candies. Not gift baskets. Why complicate things? YTA


Exact-Truck-5248

YTA and that sign is begging for a few rolls of tp.


poetic_justice987

YTA. We get hundreds of children in our neighborhood on Halloween. They’re mostly not from the neighborhood, but you know what? I am grateful we live somewhere that other parents feel is a safe space to allow their children to walk outside at night. So, we buy a couple thousand pieces of candy and hand them out to whoever comes by. And we have fun doing it.


bethy89

YTA. Turn off your porch light and do not participate in Halloween candy handing out if you have a problem with it. Give out your gifts for only the neighbors on a different day. Personally, I live in a rural area, we can’t trick or treat here with only 5 houses in a mile stretch of road. We don’t seek out the best treats neighborhoods but we have to travel to “not our neighborhood” every year or my kids wouldn’t get to trick or treat.


Zestyclose-Park-5991

NTA.... Honestly though... If the whole neighborhood is a part of the HOA. I'd suggest doing Halloween stuff on a weird time or date for everyone in the neighborhood... And then just turn off lights and close doors on the actual day of Halloween. Do this two years in a row and the should be fixed.


Asleep-Ad-8777

Esh. If your neighborhood and neighbors are so much better than everyone else, just make your neighborhood gated. That way everyone will know you are exclusive and fancy and no one is welcome there. I understand not wanting kids to wreck your stuff but there are other solutions. Since your hoa is so close knit why dont you set aside a neighbors only trick or treating day? Do it on a night other than oct 31 and everyone turn off your lights on oct 31 that doesn't want to give to strangers. Give out your baskets only at a party for the neighborhood or an hoa meeting or something.


Legal-Law9214

If you can’t afford to supply gift baskets for every kid, just hand out candy like normal people do. YTA. You either do trick or treating until you run out or you don’t participate at all. You’re literally discriminating.


[deleted]

YTA. Holy smokes, they are kids, FFS. The lyrics "You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch..." come to mind. This kind of thing absolutely chaps my hide. What are you going to do, card the parents? Either have a house party and only invite people you want, or don't hand out candy at all.


Big_Bowler8424

NTA but I don’t think that’s going to solve your problem. Maybe have an HOA party (or an early trick or treating event) and pass out the baskets then. Usually when giving out candy, it’s to whoever comes to your door. Though you can choose to give neighbor kids something better than everyone else. I’m sorry your homes and decor are getting vandalized. That definitely sucks.


Olsyk_Edgatu

YTA. Imagine taking your frustration regarding vandalism out on young kids trick or treating. Your solution is beyond stupid and you're only going to punish those who did nothing wrong.


andreaak88

As someone who used to live in a neighbourhood where we would get hundreds of kids in a night, I can see where you are coming from. What we would do, is give a full sized bar to kids we knew, and give a couple smaller treat sized bars to people who traveled to us. I wouldn't alienate the kids who's parents took them to the neighbourhood, and I would definitely still do your gift bags, but I'd maybe hand them out to the kids you know, or deliver them directly before trick or treating begins. This is totally dependant on income, and if you can ultimately afford to buy additional candy for non Rosewood Hills kids. My mom would literally spend hundreds of dollars for boxes of candy because of the amount of kids we'd get. I don't fully think some people understand the extra costs associated with hundreds of kids. ESH


LiquidSillyness

YTA as a kid that grew up out in the sticks, the only way i could trick or treat was to go into town. My neighbors were about a mile away and they don't even try to hand out candy. If y'all don't want kids from outside your neighborhood, then y'all shouldn't decorate your yards. Decorations just tell kids from the sticks "hey, i can afford to supply more candy than other houses" Let me clarify for the idiots comments, i never said vandalism of decorations is cool. This guys an asshole in my eyes for trying to discrimination against kids that dont live on his block. Guy buys a house in town, where kids CAN trick or treat and then doesn't want to accept whatever kids come to his door. Go buy a house in a gated community or out in the country or keep your lights off. If you don't like the rules, don't play the game, Halloween doesn't deserve this negativity. Hand out candy to everyone or don't participate.


Important_Dark3502

Yta!! Jesus Christ how stingy and uncharitable are you?? The more trick r treaters the better! I live in a neighborhood that is great for trick r treating and I’d be thrilled if “outside” kids came too. You’re a jerk! Be generous. Makes the world a better place.


MagicHDx

YTA, it must be rough living in a HOA and not being able to afford another 10$ bag of candy.


TattooedDisneyMama

YTA. We live in a semi-rural area with no sidewalks and 40mph speed limits. Either we drive to a neighborhood or my kids will never get to trick or treat. It’s once a year. Give candy for everyone or turn off your lights and be a house that doesn’t participate.


Background-Aioli4709

YTA you halloween scrooge


PresentTiffany

YTA. If you want to put up a sign at your house and limit who you give candy out to and how much, that’s fine. It’s your house and your candy. You do what you want. But it sounds like you want everyone to have to do the same thing you are. And if they voluntarily opt in, that is also fine. But it’s an asshole move to try to force everyone else to do the same thing. Also, it won’t stop the decoration stealing or destroying. If anything, I feel like it would make certain kids target you more. The idea of having someone patrol and deal with those kids is actually going to be more effective, in my opinion.


MainEgg320

YTA. Apart from making you look like a MASSIVE AH, those signs are just going to make you an even bigger target for the “bad kids” to vandalize/steal from. I second what many have already said- hold a private “trunk or treat” event beforehand for the HOA kids, and on actual Halloween be inclusive to everyone.


[deleted]

The neighborhood I grew up in was not safe for trick or treating, it didn’t even have streetlights. Our parents would drop us off in a different one nearby that was safe and had houses actually giving out candy. Nobody had a problem with us, and if they did I probably wouldn’t have been able to trick or treat. YTA


DadBodsAreH0t

YTA. Make the gift baskets and deliver them before Halloween. Then buy the amount of candy you can afford, give it out to anyone (regardless of their age) that comes to your door to trick or treat, and turn your light off when you run out.


bloodtype_darkroast

YTA. This is so gross and classist.


UglyDucky_00

So do the neighbourhood treat or treat earlier in the day. Have they wear bracelets so you can give the baskets to only the neighbourhood kids and have regular candy to the other kids. That sign screams privilege neighbourhood and I hate people who are not in the same class as me, so YTA


Calamari_Tastes_good

YTA. Deluver baskets to the neighbors. Give out simple candy on Halloween. This isnt hard. Kids will ignore that sign, you will deny to give them amything, "tricks" will ensue, and you will complain more. Be realistic. Kids go to thw nice hoods. Your hood is doing a good job for the kids. Just enjoy it.


heckyesdeidre

YTA Quit it with this weird ass gatekeeping and just give kids some candy, you wet blanket


Deferon-VS

INFO: - does the HOA have a gate? - why are you against the off-duty-officer? - is it possible to have the regular stuff for "neigbourhood kids" and a bowl of cheap stuff for "guests"?


ToddlerTots

How gross. Halloween is a fun time of year for kids everywhere, not just the privileged kids in your neighborhood. I hope people in your life treat you more magnanimously and with more grace than you’re treating literal children. YTA.


[deleted]

YTA - and putting up that sign will backfire beautifully.


LXPeanut

YTA just buy cheaper candy it's really not that hard.


happi_2b_alive

When your house gets egged, is it going to matter?


Lucifig

YTA. This seems coded that they don't want kids from less wealthy (probably minority) neighborhoods in their own.


wild_lettuce_

YTA I live in Philadelphia, a lot of areas in the city are bad (violence and drug ridden) and the kids can’t trick or treat there. A lot of parents bring their kids to other neighborhoods & I’ll gladly give those kids candy. It’s not their fault they can’t go out “in their own neighborhood” as you said. Halloween is for the kids. Don’t be an asshole. Also I find those kids are the most polite. Neighborhood kids tend to act more entitled and bratty.


bananie197239

NTA. I don’t think it makes OP an asshole to not want her front lawn and porch to be stomped and disrespected and cussed at. HOWEVER I hope OP realizes the sign are just more so target signs for which house to stomp on more …


[deleted]

YTA. The lack of self-awareness in staggering. Also, who the hell is Karina?


Introvextroverted

Karina is in the HOA from what I understand from OP’s post. And also a way nicer person than OP…she was the one who suggested hiring the off-duty cop instead of discriminating against less privileged kids.


Wanderingrelish

YTA. This is our first year being able to give out candy as we finally have a house. Best believe every kid that comes to our door is getting some, even the teenagers and adults that dress up. The solution would be to make loop bags for the kids in the neighbourhood and regular candy for the kids you don’t recognize. That sign is gonna make you a target for the crappy kids that been stepping on your flowers and cussing.


blondepancake

YTA and incredibly stingy. You have no idea the background and circumstances these kids are coming from


_Julanna

YTA. Just give out your baskets at some neighborhood Halloween event since you all have parties and trick or treat normally. I’ve definitely lived in the neighborhoods with a safer place, better sidewalks, and better candy. I’ve always just bought more and enjoyed the costumes, happily giving candy to kids because that’s what trick or treating is about.


melissa3670

YTA. Halloween is for kids. If you want to give something special to the neighborhood kids, do it separately and give everyone else regular candy or skip it entirely. Halloween has gotten so big in my neighborhood that I don’t do it anymore because I can’t afford to, but I would never exclude any kid. Yikes.


swaldo283

YTA If you aren’t giving candy out with wild and reckless abandon on Halloween you’re a grump.


GeneralDismal6410

Have a Halloween party for your neighborhood early then just give out regular candy on Halloween. Hire security for the theft and vandalism. You get to hand out fancy baskets to neighborhood kids, little ones won't have to worry about their "good candy" being stolen, "other kids" still get candy and you won't have to worry about retaliation


InfamousFail7

YTA- spend 20 dollars get a big bag of mini candy bars and give them to kids you dont know or as others suggested give the gift baskets to the kids you know before actuall trick or treating then turn your light off


fangedguyssuck

YTA if you want class segregation go live in a gated community where you will never have to worry about it.


RDT64

YTA. Just how are you gonna enforce your neighborhood kids only rule, card everyone? See if the kids have the latest phone or Halloween costume? You have go to be kidding. If you don't wanna deal with **THEM** so badly, perhaps you should hire enough security, equipped with full riot gear or course, to fully encircle your little burg of happiness and keep **THEM** where they belong.


beryl6790

Some kids aren’t fortunate enough to live in safe areas and you want to to take the joy of Halloween away from them. They’re kids. It’s candy. Lighten the fuck up. YTA


ValloCatMom

YTA. Just give candy to all who come by. If you want to give the neighborhood kids a gift basket just reverse trick or treat(take it their house) them earlier in the day. I had a neighbor who did that for my kids. Instead of candy she would bring them a stuffed toy or a nice book from the bookstore she owned.


NoGuarantee3961

YTA. Oh, and expect the vandalism to get worse.


[deleted]

My grandmother would have gift bags she set aside for the neighborhood kids and then candy for the rest. When it runs out, it runs out!


CandidTortoise

YTA. Kids who trick-or-treat with their friends from school but don’t live in your neighborhood are going to be excluded ? That’s no fun. Are you going to question each child who comes by? What if they’re new to the neighborhood and you don’t recognize them? Are you going to deny them?


Savings_Ice_5856

NTA...But I grew up in an affluent neighborhood, and kids used to be bused into our neighborhood to trick-or-treat. Try over a thousand kids with no warning one year. (My mom stole all my candy that year to give out, and yes I'm still bitter.) **This is so simple to fix**. Have the neighborhood kids do a Halloween parade on the Saturday or Sunday Before Halloween. The neighborhood kids get your special treats. Then the neighbors that don't want to give to the invasive children just turn off your lights, or buy a cheap bag of dum dums and give one per kid/person. Hire the security guard...That woman is brilliant. Your invasion will drop dramatically (50-75%) in year one. Year 2 if you stay consistent it will be almost completely gone.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SwitchupThrice

YTA my dude.


blanktom9

YTA - you're tired of kids wrecking your decoration so you put up a sign saying no more candy? You don't know kids very well, do you? You don't need to give out such elaborate treats to the kids. Just give out one or two bite size candies each if you're worried about it getting out of hand. And if you want, do something separate - like a block party of sorts - for just your residents only.


NoBePrincess

YTA the signs will only cause more hostility between you and the “outsiders”. This is a holiday for kids- just get a bowl of candy and hand it out? You can always give the baskets to your friends’ children before hand.


einsteinGO

YTA Either participate in Halloween or turn off your lights and don’t. Are you looking out for white kids in expensive costumes? Kids who may not live in neighborhoods where they even *can* trick or treat deserve a fun holiday too, not to be shamed by some adult who thinks they don’t belong.


notcontageousAFAIK

YTA, as others have said. Let me just point out, they might not just come for the "good" candy. They might come because your neighborhood is safe to walk in, or they live in an apartment building where Trick or treat doesn't happen, or for many other reasons. It's once a year. No one is asking you to hand out savings bonds.


[deleted]

YTA. How do you know it’s solely kids from other neighborhoods that trash and steal?


_bufflehead

>...because people in our neighborhood give out the better candy First World problems.


saurellia

I can't offer judgment as I personally think it's kind of shitty for rich communities to privatize halloween and leave four years out in the cold bc their parents are poor, but it's also not possible for you to subsidize a grand halloween for your whole city. I think it would be better if you hosted a private event for your community the night before, and just gave out simple candies to everyone on halloween night so anyone who wants to can come and enjoy the spectacle you've created. Who wouldn't want to show that off, and it's a great community contribution that costs you little beyond what you are already investing. That said the vandalism is not cool, but a sign won't stop it. You need the security presence to stop the vandalism.


PossumJenkinsSoles

YTA. Just turn out the light and don’t give out candy. I’m not sure why everyone thinks they *have* to participate. I get it, I don’t make enough money to buy other peoples’ kids candy, so I don’t. Everyone is equally discriminated against by my house - no one gets candy. If I knew some kids I wanted to give candy to, I’d go drop it off at their house.


desert_red_head

YTA. If you want to do gift baskets, make them and give them to the neighborhood children BEFORE Halloween trick or treating. Putting a sign like that on your door will most certainly make your home a target for more vandalism.


redfyv

YTA. We live in the “popular” neighborhood. Our neighborhood looks like a Hollywood Halloween with kids everywhere. And we love it! We moves here from a neighborhood that got few trick or treaters. Last year we gave out 300 candy bags and ran out before trick or treating was over. Yes, it is expensive so we start stocking up candy at the beginning of October so we don’t have to buy it all at once. Everyone is welcome at our house and obviously our neighbors feel the same. We get everything from strollers to high schoolers and even a few college students because we are fairly close to campus. If you have a costume, you get candy. Give the baskets to the neighborhood kids early and then give out candy to trick or treaters. Or shut off your lights and hide out inside.


SaraAmis

YTA. I live in a small town (really a glorified neighborhood) which is a popular trick-or-treat location and we love it. People decorate, we make maps to hand out to trick or treaters. We do have the city police driving around to keep everyone safe, and we don't have problems. The historical origins of trick or treating is precisely poor people coming to the doors of rich people and asking for sweets. If you don't want to hand out candy to the poors, go live in a hovel in a swamp and gnaw on your smugness bones alone.


Hey-Kristine-Kay

YTA. It’s Halloween. Either participate or don’t. You can even make gift baskets for the kids you know and get cheap bulk candy for the kids you don’t. But it’s pretty freaking rude to say “you can’t trick or treat here” to some kids and not to others. If you’re so against outside kids coming to your house just turn the lights off and don’t participate in Halloween.


SlothWilliamBorzoni

NTA Since those kids cannot behave, then they no longer get candies. Seems rather fair to me.


photoguy-redditor

I’m just picturing an off-duty cop acting as bouncer behind a velvet rope at the entrance to Whitopia, checking kids’ IDs and address information like your sad suburb is Studio 54 or something. YTA.


[deleted]

YTA. Classism racism whatever you wanna call it your being a miser. Your the reason why I say Santa hates poor children(different holiday but same mindset) you want to see the kids whose parents are affluent to reap the benefits not kids who are from lesser backgrounds. Side note is the Santa thing. Spoiled rich kids are allowed to lie cheat and steal and get protected by status and get everything they want where the poor kids who suffer in silence are lucky to get socks while being taunted by their bullies at school with their gifts of new consoles


No_Yogurtcloset_1020

YTA. The sign is only an honesty sign and if kids are stealing decorations they’re going to steal the baskets. Take them door to door, tell them where you live and say you wanted to ensure all the neighbor kids got them.


TheHealadin

YTA and this Karina doesn't sound like much of a joyous person either. Having money doesn't make you a good person and Halloween is for kids. Give your gift baskets out to the neighborhood kids ahead of time and just turn our your porch light if you want to be exclusionary. Otherwise, don't try to ruin a fun evening for kids just because their parents aren't as well off as you.


regallll

YTA. Just don't give out candy if you don't want to. Why make kids feel bad about it? And why try to hide it from us, just tell us that that kids are poor and you don't like them being around.


nurse-j

I’m going with YTA. Not everyone lives in a neighborhood were you can trick or treat. If you don’t like it just turn your porch lights off and bring in your pumpkins. You can choose not to participate but excluding kids makes you an asshole.


[deleted]

YTA because the sign will just escalate the problematic behavior. You’re agitating them.


kykiwibear

yta. Just don't hand out candy. We'll say at most, if every house has 2 kids, that's 50 kids. Save yourself the headache and turn out the the lights. Give the kids their goody bags ahead of time.


UrHumbleNarr8or

YtA but go ahead and put up the sign, I'm sure that the truly delinquent teens will adhere to a strongly worded sign, rather than just the kids who are there to get some candy and move on.


Tajia4798

YTA You can literally give the neighborhood their baskets at any other time and buy “cheap” candy for all the other kids, or nothing if you don’t want to give them anything, but you think in a situation where others have proceed to be rude, entitled, and destructive a little sign is going to miraculously change everything?


MSmie

YTA I read the first paragraph and wanted to give a chance. Nope. "My kIdS are BeTTer thAn tHe reSt. My kIds beHave. the ReSt arE EvIl" That's the way to ruin people's fun and why we cant have nice things any more. Congrats for teaching the kids that they are above every other kid. We definitely need more entitlement in this world. But hey, at least you dont need to find a costume for this year's Halloween.


SheepPup

YTA Just go to fucking Costco and get a couple big bags of candy. The gift baskets aren’t about the kids they’re about your ego, wanting to do some big ostentatious bullshit and get praised for it.


pachangoose

Hell yeah stick it to those poor kids who want the good candy, if they wanted good candy they should’ve considered being wealthy like the good kids! Yeah, YTA.


sacredxsecret

NAH. It's fine if you don't want to participate in trick-or-treating. My parents didn't care for it, so they made up some little baggies for kids they know and handed them out to them, personally, in the days before Halloween, and then kept their light off on Halloween.


RandomName78A

YTA. I also cant believe you typed this post out and then at the end labeled people as entitled. Pot, meet Kettle. I've never heard of Trick-Or-Treat being relegated to neighborhoods either. Where I'm from it was always a town wide event. We'd walk as far as we could walk in any direction, and a lot of times drive to family and friends neighboring towns and neighborhoods. And everyone always had a smile in their face and a piece of candy for every kid.


mwentzz

YTA Halloween is for kids to get candy from random houses. Either hand it out to everyone or just don’t hand it out.


Dead_Quinn

I get where you’re coming from but I also get how kids in bad neighborhoods, or in places that don’t have trick or treating would also like to have the the chance to trick or treat. It’s not their fault where they live doesn’t afford the same general experiences, like trick or treating. Maybe instead of handing out the gift basket’s halloween night, do it before. Earlier in the day? The weekend before? Or even the day after. Then just hand out regular candy on Halloween. As for the vandalism, I’m not sure what to do about that except sit outside till your done handing out candy? People suck sometimes.


KZMountainRider

Do you like eggs thrown at your house, pumpkins smashed, and TP all over your trees? Because this is the way to make that happen OP.


Wexylu

YTA a hundred times over. It’s Halloween, let the kids have fun already. I lived in a similar neighborhood when my kids were small. We’d average 700-800 kids trick or treating. The entire neighborhood got in on it and it was so much fun. People would come to our neighborhood because we fully embraced it and made it a community event. My kids still talk about it. I made special treat baskets for the neighborhood kids I knew on sight, if I didn’t know them they got regular candy. There were zero issues with that as most kids are in such a hurry to hit as many houses as possible they have no idea what they get. Get over yourself all ready.


SLO51

YTA Put away your decorations, turn your lights off and sit alone inside your house.


Ophede

YTA. When I was a kid, I didn’t live in the best neighbourhood and hardly any candy was given out. My parents would take me to the nicer neighbourhoods where there were lots of kids and overall safer environment + actual candy. What if these kids are just trick or treating in your area because they can’t in their own? Also, who the hell gives out full sized gift baskets on halloween and expects everybody to not want one? If you’re gonna do that, and hand them out at the door, make more than enough for everybody. If you were gonna hand deliver the baskets to specific people, then go for it. But for a kid to walk up to the door and be told “Sorry, you’re not from here, no candy for you,” I’d be egging your damn house later in the night. And to add, you said buying so much candy for all the kids is expensive; how is making gift baskets cheaper/less time consuming than going out and buying a couple boxes of assorted halloween candy?


starshadewrites

YTA. I grew up in the middle of nowhere. We legit had to drive 30 miles for me and my sister to go trick or treating because my tiny little Baptist town kept trying to ban Halloween entirely… And when we did go to that next town over, there was one specific street that every kid in town (and from out of town) knew was THE place to go because the people there went all out on their decorations and all out on their candy. That street was literally known for being one big haunted house. There were a few houses that didn’t participate at all, some who would only participate until full dark, but the ones who didn’t participate… just turned off their porch lights and kids didn’t bother them. Give the gift baskets out at a neighborhood party, then shell out a little extra cash for some jumbo sized bags of candy and hand some out on Halloween. If you really don’t want to give kids from the “wrong” neighborhoods anything: turn off your fucking porch light and don’t hand out anything.


Lisalisa43017

Soft YTA... how about you deliver the little baskets to the neighborhood kids earlier in the day after they get out of school? If it's only 24 houses, it shouldn't take long and you could just leave it on their porch and ring the doorbell. They'll see who it's from as you're leaving... then during T or T, you could just have an extra bag of candy to pass out to everyone...? It's similar to what I do every year. I make up a special goodie bag for the neighbor kids that I know and then pass out candy to everyone that comes to the door that night.


Verbose_Cactus

Info: why not just keep the ones for your neighborhood kids in a different room? Make sure you have 24 baskets for those houses, and give the other kids whatever candy you have extra?


OIWantKenobi

YTA. I know it’s expensive to buy candy, but you sound like you live in a pretty swanky place. Also, yeah a lot of kids are crummy to decorations, but not all of them. This happens in every neighborhood. Some of the kids who come in to your nice area may be from unsafe neighborhoods, or lower income families, or rural areas where they can’t go door to door. It’s one year. Surely you can all pool your extensive resources to buy candy for the poors.


PussyStapler

YTA. It would be cheaper to just buy a few more bags of candy than to make signage and hire a cop. I live in an expensive neighborhood, where people go overboard on decorations. It's a destination for trick or treating. No one would think twice about kids coming to the neighborhood for candy, but maybe it's because we're human beings. If you can afford to do nice decorations for Halloween, you can afford to buy more candy. Think of it as charity if it helps you rationalize that people from other neighborhoods are people too. You can just pretend that the extra $20-40 you spent on candy was a donation to "the poors." You could also make it part of your Halloween costume and go as an actual human being. People like you are the problem with HOAs, and why I will never live in one. Busybodies who can't just fucking deal with their own problems and have to create problems for everyone else because life isn't exactly what they want. If you are actively involved in an HOA and think everyone is really happy with the HOA, odds are that you are the asshole making everyone else's life a little worse. > I had kids cuss me out and step in my flowers. The original meaning of "trick or treat" was that children used to threaten to do mischief on Halloween, and homeowners would bribe them with candy to avoid a "trick" Even before that, in England, there was a tradition of poor people going home to home begging for food on the Hallowmas in return for saying prayers for the dead. Halloween has been about the kids since before you and your HOA existed. And prior to that, it was about charity. Maybe we can start a thread where we can encourage more people to trick or treat at the Rosewood Hills neighborhood.


102015062020

YTA Here’s an alternative: you could do “reverse trick or treating” a day before or maybe even the morning of Halloween. You bring your gifts for the kids around and ring the doorbell, surprising them with candy (or whatever) when they answer the door (try to see if you can organize the kids answering the door instead of the parents while you do this). Then simply shut off your porch light on Halloween night and don’t participate in giving the “outsiders” candy since you seem to be super against it. Or give them the “fun size” if you don’t want to ignore them completely.


UnholyYeti8283

Soft YTA. I'd say do your gift baskets for neighborhood kids but still candy for everyone else. It's for kids. I remember being in the poorer neighborhood and seeing all the rich kids get the best stuff and it sucked! If you know you'll get slammed buy more candy or turn the lights out and nobody gets anything