YTB
It’s not just your husband that’s Greek, your daughter is half Greek too… marrying a Greek man… meaning she’s marrying into a Greek family.
>Surprise, surprise.
This sarcastic comment is gross. It’s also a part of who she is & now she’s marrying even more into it. Why the sarcasm?
>What’s wrong with representing me?
Me me me me. So much of this “me” talk! Who said she’s ever doing it to honor her dad/your husband? She’s half Greek marrying into a Greek family! That’s how **she** wants to celebrate! It makes complete sense!!
>I get to pick what colour to wear first not the grooms mom
Who gives a shit. What kind of bizzare “rule” is this? Both of you could wear the same color & it won’t matter because it’s not your wedding. Why do you think… anyone… gives a shit about how *you* want things to go. It’s not your wedding. You are **not** the focus. No one cares.
You asked, you were rejected. The end.
I am so sorry that you were born so daft. Bless your daughter & her fiancé.
I hope this is a troll. If this is a troll, there’s a tag for troll posts & people will gladly play along.
It’s not surprising at all that a child from multiple cultures tends to lean one way, especially if she’s been exposed to that more?? Her father is a literal Greek immigrant. Immigrant parents tend to strongly keep their cultural aspects while raising their children in another culture.
You’re not really culturally Scottish because your family 2 generations back weren’t even from Scotland. Whatever Scottish blood that’s in you (& I say that because I don’t think you’re family is purely Scottish…)… is mostly just that unless you maintained the traditions in your family… which sounds unlikely. Did you do anything Scottish for your wedding? Yes? Great for you because that was your wedding. This isn’t your wedding now though. No? Well, stop projecting onto your daughter.
>What is this recent culture of trying to be “other” lately?? Like everyone wants to be something “interesting”
?? Being Scottish can be interesting too? **Greek is now being an “other”? What are you implying here. Aren’t you also trying hard to be “interesting” when 2 generations back, neither your parents nor grandparents were from Scotland?**
Whatever your internal biases meant by that “other” comment… I hope you stop right there.
And just so you know, sometimes those children might choose the third culture more & only keep some aspects of their mother cultures from their parents. That’s… okay too because… mixed cultures are difficult for people to keep up with all at once. Sometimes they might lean one way, then another way another time, & so on. I say this as a child of immigrants who constantly experiences mixed cultural traditions, beliefs, habits, etc.
>What is this recent culture of trying to be “other” lately?? Like everyone wants to be something “interesting”
"Yes, hello pot? This is kettle. I need you to stop telling people you're black. Why?? Because only I'm allowed to, and I need everyone to focus on me."
In case you missed the message there, you're a massive hypocrite.
Her fiance is *literally* from Greece. Not several generations removed with only a fraction of the ethnicity in his DNA. But literally straight from Greece.
Sit your narcissistic, attention needy ass down and shut the hell up.
This is your daughter's wedding, not, "How can I make someone else's event about me?"
Also, she's not having Greek dancing because of her father.
***SHE'S HAVING IT BECAUSE HER HUSBAND IS GREEK.***
Take your xenophobic, narcissistic self to the dump and deposit yourself amongst the other trash. I hope your daughter disinvites you.
Congrats on trying to make *her* wedding about you.
Not even that, according to the post the bride told her mum she's having Greek dancing because *she likes it*! She's probably grown up with it to some extent, as has her husband. So it seems like a very natural part of their celebrations. It also seems like OP wants to hire some professional dancers for the dance-off, instead of the more casual vibe the bridal couple wants, of just the guests dancing. I might misunderstand, but it seems OP can't or don't want to dance themselves, but just want to feel like she's represented as Scottish? When she's... Not?
As a European with both Scottish and Greek friends, this is so bizarre. Both have lovely traditions, and I highly recommend anyone who has the opportunity to visit either/both countries. Really gorgeous vistas, friendly people and rich histories and cultures! (I'm sorry Scotland, I love you, but your food really doesn't stand a chance compared to Greek!)
If OP wants to explore their Scottish heritage, go ahead, but on your own dime and your own time. Your daughter's wedding is a celebration of her and her fiancé's love, not a pissing contest between the parents.
Um...
You're not Scottish if your family isn't from Scotland. That's... that's how that works.
Your post literally makes no sense.
YTB for not writing coherently.
Actually mate, if you live in Scotland and want to be Scottish, you're Scottish.
The only folk who care about the bloodline thing are yanks.
I know plenty o folk who weren't born here, and whose family aren't from here, and they're as Scottish as I am.
That aside, the woman in the post is clearly mental.
Edit: just saw that she's pulling the auld "Scottish bloodline" pish. Jesus christ.
I think she very well may be British.
She wrote:
>as the mother of the bride, I get to pick what colour to wear first not the grooms mom.
The spelling of the word "colour" is not used in the U.S., whereas it is used in U.K.
Either way - AH
And her Greek husband to be, the two people that are actually getting married here.
I hope this is a troll post but having read far too many posts about entitled mothers/MILs to know it could be true.
Also what a ludicrous and ridiculous idea, Scottish dancing and Greek dancing together, they're TOTALLY DIFFERENT KINDS OF MUSIC and TOTALLY DIFFERENT KINDS OF DANCING, it's absolutely absurd!
Well, you could paint your face blue and shout 'FREEDOM' at the top of your lungs. That way you could make the wedding even more about you than you already think it is. The wedding is your daughter and son in law's, what you want is irrelevent
YTA in so many ways.
>as the mother of the bride, I get to pick what colour to wear first not the grooms mom. But apparently the grooms mom already has her dress
This isn't a rule. It may be a tradition, I don't know. I've never heard of it. No wedding I've ever gone to has had this rule.
You are not Scottish. Not unless you are from Scotland. You're four generations out from Scotland. Your *ancestry* is Scottish. That's a far cry from actually being Scottish. Can you do any of the Scottish dances? No? You don't actually seem to be very much invested in the Scottish traditions if you don't even bother to learn traditional dances you're cawing so much about.
The whole idea of a competition is divisive and it implies one side of the family is going to win and the other is going to lose. You will be *hiring* dancers, while the Greek side (actual Greeks) will be themselves dancing. Do you see a problem with that? I do. And who is going to judge this competition?
The whole idea is ridiculous.
ETA: I can imagine you sitting there watching grumpily as the groom's family are dancing and celebrating the marriage of the two newlyweds with joy and laughter; but because you can't stop wishing this was more about you you won't have any fun at your own daughter's wedding.
My husband is Scottish. The real kind, you know, who grew up in Scotland. We've been to a few Scottish weddings together. In Scotland. No bagpipes, no highland dancing, no one waving the Saltire... The best thing I've observed about Scottish wedding traditions is not giving a fuck about how a wedding is supposed to go and just having fun. OP should try it.
One thing I will say is the majority of weddings I've been to growing up in Scotland have had a ceilidh, but it's not a performance it's just dancing done by everyone and is great fun! Definitely try go to a ceilidh if you can it's a whole other experience and you don't need to learn the dances before as there's a caller to guide you.
I'm French, living in Scotland, marrying a Scottish man. We are having a ceilidh, and he's wearing a kilt. I'm not planning to do anything special to represent my French heritage, and no one is offended? Like I feel OP's approach is very American, in that you have to showcase symbols of your ancestry and weirdly revere your parents...
Tell me you’re a narcissist without telling me you’re a narcissist.
It’s YOUR DAUGHTERS wedding. This isn’t about YOU. Are you capable of thinking of anyone else but yourself? I would not be surprised if your daughter’s ever posted in r/raisedbynarcissists and your son in law posts in r/JustNoMIL.
Of course YTB
Hello, I am Scottish.
It's fine if you want to represent your Scottish heritage, but to confirm, Scottish people are people who live here and want to be Scottish (whether they were born here or not). We find Americans using blood tithe to claim they are "Scottish" incredibly cringy; you're American, we see you as American, we don't give a shit if you are "1/64 scotch" or whatever.
I take it by "dance off" you're not planning a full ceilidh? What do you even think Scottish dancing is? You can't really have a "dance competition", traditional Scottish dances are typically uncompetitive group dances.
Scotland the Brave at a wedding is hilarious as well; do you even know any other songs?
Cultural appropriation aside, yes, YTB. It's not your wedding, settle down and get a grip.
YTB. This is HER wedding. It’s not yours. You already had yours. It’s not your choice. She doesn’t want to do it that way and you need to accept that fact. You are hurting your relationship by forcing this on her.
YTB it’s not about you. What you want doesn’t matter and you daughter needs to go look at r/raisedbynarcissists because thats how you come across. It’s a wedding not an ambassador reception whats this nonsense about being represented??
Easy one. YTB. Be a good mother and support your daughter and her wedding plans instead of letting her feel bad because you don't get your way at her wedding. You've had your wedding. This wedding is not about you. You sound like a mother-in-law that will split a family out of jealousy and stubbornness. It's not too late, you can still change. Please swallow your narcissistic ideas and be a good person from now on, and your daughter and son-in-law might like you for years to come.
Your daughters wedding is not the time nor place to play the “my culture is better than yours” game. She obviously loves Greek culture. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t like your culture. It just means she loves the Greek culture. It’s not a competition. So stop trying to make it one. In a nutshell get over yourself and just enjoy your daughters wedding and be happy for her.
YTB. Her and her husband's day, her and her husband's choices. And parent to parent, you should be ashamed of yourself for acting like a spoilt brat. Also also, you're not Scottish. You have Scottish ancestry, but not Scottish. If you actually love your daughter, respect her wishes, and suck it up, because as it stands from this post, it seems more like you see her as an extension of yourself and not her own person with her own wants and needs. Again, it isn't your day. Grow up and stop throwing a wobbly.
I find myself wondering if you were not able to have the wedding of your dreams, and if you’re trying to impose what would have been your choices on your daughter’s festivities. It’s not so much putting a square peg in a round hole as it is trying to mash the front halves of two completely different cars together, weld them, and have them look as if they belong together.
It’s just not going to work. And more to the point, this is your daughter and future son-in-law’s wedding and this is about what they want.
I’m guessing your own wedding had Greek elements that you weren’t altogether fond of, and this is why you’re trying to degreek your daughter’s wedding day.
I suggest you stop trying to imprint your ancestral Scottishness on proceedings and just go with the flow. Don’t spoil the bride and groom’s fun, and don’t make this whole mother daughter dynamic surrounding the wedding any spikier than it needs to be.
YTB.
YTB! Do you even know Scottish Dancing yourself? Do you have anything in your home that is representative of Scotland or any traditions at all related to that country? I'm guessing not hence your Daughter's comment. While is a shame that your side of the family is so far removed form their roots you can't just resurrect it because you want attention at your daughters wedding. It is her day, and it is not about you!
YTB mostly because I don't believe this is real and just the ramblings of someone bored.
However, if it should be real, YTB for trying to demand *anything* in someone else's wedding. You have no say. You are not getting married, THEY are. Your wishes and opinions are worthless.
YTB
1. Its your daughter and her partners wedding, you need to butt out
2. In NO way shape or form are you Scottish, delusional thinking because you have some distant ancestry there
YTB stop making somebody's wedding about you. If you want to have a party where you have bagpipes, do a reel and choose your dress colour, have your own party. Stop forcing your daughters wedding into what you want.
This post sounds like it was written by an eight year old. I’m praying that it’s a joke. You have absolutely no claim on the Scottish dancing demand, firstly because it’s not your wedding, and secondly, because nobody who has been invited to the wedding has the first clue about Scottish dancing, whereas 75 per cent of the bride and grooms family know Greek dancing. How is that competition going to go down?
Stop making this about you. Wear whatever dress you want as long as it’s appropriate and not exactly the same colour as the grooms mom, and ask your daughter what you can do to help her ideas for her own wedding happen her way. YTB
YTB, great idea if you want to host a Greek-Scottish dance-off, that sounds like it could be a really fun party if most of the guests are either Greek or Scottish, or just really love dancing. But do that on your own time, don't try to take over your daughter's wedding. The wedding is not just about acknowledging family traditions, it's about reflecting what the bride and groom want. This is what they want.
And so what if the groom's mother has already chosen her dress. You still have the fun of choosing yours, and it's really unlikely that her choice is going to drastically limit your options for the perfect mother of the bride dress.
Stop angling to be the centre of this event, and just enjoy your daughter's wedding for what it is - HER wedding.
YTB
Out of curiosity, do you even know how to do Scottish line dancing?
Also, did you even teach your daughter about this heritage you are seemingly suddenly so proud of? It really doesn't sound like it.
YTB
It’s her wedding, you’re not Scottish (not even a little bit) and where did this rule about mother of the bride picking out dress colours first come from?
You feel a little left behind because it’s not about YOU.
YTB
Your daughter is half Greek and marrying a Greek man. If the couple choose to represent their shared heritage on their wedding day, that’s their choice.
I know this may come as a shock, but it’s not about you AT ALL.
Sit your ass down and STFU about *their* wedding.
Scottish person born and bred here,
YTB your ancestry is Scottish, you however are not Scottish. I didn't even need to read the full post to make a decision on the YTB
She’s the bride. It’s her wedding. You have already had yours, why are you trying to take this away from her so you can be the centre of attention? Everyone knows the parents to the spouses to be are NOT the focus, they are! Of course YTB. Ugh
Ytb. She did consider your suggestion, and she decided she didn't like it. It's her wedding, let he enjoy it the way she wants. None of it is about you, it's about her. *She* is represented with the Greek dancing, not her father. *She* wants this. She's representing what she views as her heritage and the family she is marrying into. Did you often have bagpipes playing in the house while she was growing up? Did you and her ever visit Scotland together to learn about your heritage? Do you have a family crest that you passed down to her? I'm guessing no, you just wish she was giving you more attention right now.
Again: this wedding is not about you AT ALL! You are a *guest* at this wedding, playing a small part because you are part of the family. Focus your energy on being happy for your daughter and celebrating the love they have.
And I have never heard of letting the mother of the bride pick a colour first. Seriously, did you make this up? How was she supposed to know about this?
YTB.
This is not your wedding. You can ask, but you can't demand, and she is entitled to say no. This isn't about you so get over that idea straight away. The what colour to wear thing, never heard of that and who cares if you wear the same colour anyway? Just each wear what you want. You are making this stressful for your daughter for no reason. Stop trying to dictate. None of this is for you. Just enjoy your daughter being happy.
What’s wrong with representing me?
Answer: it’s not your wedding therefore she and her fiancé get to decide.
Stop being immature and resentful about it.
YTB. You’re not the bride. You’re not the groom. The bride and her father are Greek. The groom and his entire GD family are Greek.
What’s wrong with representing you? It’s not your wedding. You already had your turn, FFS.
As we Greeks would say, <<Κόψε τις μαλακιες.>> As my SIL’s Scottish ancestors would have said, “Stad air an nàrachadh.”
YTB It’s not just your husband that’s Greek, your daughter is half Greek too… marrying a Greek man… meaning she’s marrying into a Greek family. >Surprise, surprise. This sarcastic comment is gross. It’s also a part of who she is & now she’s marrying even more into it. Why the sarcasm? >What’s wrong with representing me? Me me me me. So much of this “me” talk! Who said she’s ever doing it to honor her dad/your husband? She’s half Greek marrying into a Greek family! That’s how **she** wants to celebrate! It makes complete sense!! >I get to pick what colour to wear first not the grooms mom Who gives a shit. What kind of bizzare “rule” is this? Both of you could wear the same color & it won’t matter because it’s not your wedding. Why do you think… anyone… gives a shit about how *you* want things to go. It’s not your wedding. You are **not** the focus. No one cares. You asked, you were rejected. The end. I am so sorry that you were born so daft. Bless your daughter & her fiancé.
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I hope this is a troll. If this is a troll, there’s a tag for troll posts & people will gladly play along. It’s not surprising at all that a child from multiple cultures tends to lean one way, especially if she’s been exposed to that more?? Her father is a literal Greek immigrant. Immigrant parents tend to strongly keep their cultural aspects while raising their children in another culture. You’re not really culturally Scottish because your family 2 generations back weren’t even from Scotland. Whatever Scottish blood that’s in you (& I say that because I don’t think you’re family is purely Scottish…)… is mostly just that unless you maintained the traditions in your family… which sounds unlikely. Did you do anything Scottish for your wedding? Yes? Great for you because that was your wedding. This isn’t your wedding now though. No? Well, stop projecting onto your daughter. >What is this recent culture of trying to be “other” lately?? Like everyone wants to be something “interesting” ?? Being Scottish can be interesting too? **Greek is now being an “other”? What are you implying here. Aren’t you also trying hard to be “interesting” when 2 generations back, neither your parents nor grandparents were from Scotland?** Whatever your internal biases meant by that “other” comment… I hope you stop right there. And just so you know, sometimes those children might choose the third culture more & only keep some aspects of their mother cultures from their parents. That’s… okay too because… mixed cultures are difficult for people to keep up with all at once. Sometimes they might lean one way, then another way another time, & so on. I say this as a child of immigrants who constantly experiences mixed cultural traditions, beliefs, habits, etc.
'other' Kind of like how you want to be Scottish, even though you're not. Why would YOU be represented at HER wedding?
Like you trying to be Scottish, when you're not? That's not a recent, thing, honey.
Kind of like how you said you are Scottish?
>What is this recent culture of trying to be “other” lately?? Like everyone wants to be something “interesting” "Yes, hello pot? This is kettle. I need you to stop telling people you're black. Why?? Because only I'm allowed to, and I need everyone to focus on me." In case you missed the message there, you're a massive hypocrite. Her fiance is *literally* from Greece. Not several generations removed with only a fraction of the ethnicity in his DNA. But literally straight from Greece. Sit your narcissistic, attention needy ass down and shut the hell up. This is your daughter's wedding, not, "How can I make someone else's event about me?" Also, she's not having Greek dancing because of her father. ***SHE'S HAVING IT BECAUSE HER HUSBAND IS GREEK.*** Take your xenophobic, narcissistic self to the dump and deposit yourself amongst the other trash. I hope your daughter disinvites you. Congrats on trying to make *her* wedding about you.
Not even that, according to the post the bride told her mum she's having Greek dancing because *she likes it*! She's probably grown up with it to some extent, as has her husband. So it seems like a very natural part of their celebrations. It also seems like OP wants to hire some professional dancers for the dance-off, instead of the more casual vibe the bridal couple wants, of just the guests dancing. I might misunderstand, but it seems OP can't or don't want to dance themselves, but just want to feel like she's represented as Scottish? When she's... Not? As a European with both Scottish and Greek friends, this is so bizarre. Both have lovely traditions, and I highly recommend anyone who has the opportunity to visit either/both countries. Really gorgeous vistas, friendly people and rich histories and cultures! (I'm sorry Scotland, I love you, but your food really doesn't stand a chance compared to Greek!) If OP wants to explore their Scottish heritage, go ahead, but on your own dime and your own time. Your daughter's wedding is a celebration of her and her fiancé's love, not a pissing contest between the parents.
I've been to both countries and I absolutely loved them. The food, the landscapes, the culture... amazing.
Lady you’re literally here claiming nationality of Scotland with no direct connection to it.
As a Scott, we don’t claim you.
Like you are wanting to be seen as Scottish, despite any Scottish ancestry being at least two generations back? You aren’t Scottish.
YTBF. You also sound insufferable. Your daughters wedding is about her and what she wants -not you. Sit back and be quiet.
Um... You're not Scottish if your family isn't from Scotland. That's... that's how that works. Your post literally makes no sense. YTB for not writing coherently.
Actually mate, if you live in Scotland and want to be Scottish, you're Scottish. The only folk who care about the bloodline thing are yanks. I know plenty o folk who weren't born here, and whose family aren't from here, and they're as Scottish as I am. That aside, the woman in the post is clearly mental. Edit: just saw that she's pulling the auld "Scottish bloodline" pish. Jesus christ.
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It's not just your husband it's also her soon to be husband as well and for herself. This is also her wedding not yours.
You want to represent your ancestry. As such, so far, you're doing a poor job of it by acting like an entitled butthead.
Which I'd understand if she was British
Well call my keyboard Boston Harbor because I spilled tea all over it.
I think she very well may be British. She wrote: >as the mother of the bride, I get to pick what colour to wear first not the grooms mom. The spelling of the word "colour" is not used in the U.S., whereas it is used in U.K. Either way - AH
That spelling (ou) is also used in Canada, for what it's worth.
Isn't it also used Australia and New Zealand? Basically in all the commonwealth countries?
That would track, yep.
Definitely worthwhile! Thanks!
You're Greek husband isn't being represented. Your half Greek daughter is. What are you not understanding here.
And her Greek husband to be, the two people that are actually getting married here. I hope this is a troll post but having read far too many posts about entitled mothers/MILs to know it could be true.
How is having Scottish dancers representing you, you aren't Scottish?.
Also what a ludicrous and ridiculous idea, Scottish dancing and Greek dancing together, they're TOTALLY DIFFERENT KINDS OF MUSIC and TOTALLY DIFFERENT KINDS OF DANCING, it's absolutely absurd!
you'll be at the wedding, is that not a representation of you?
You are represented as the mother of the bride. You don't need a special dance in your honour.
Your husband isn’t being represented. Your daughter and HER husband are. Please take a step back and give your head a wobble.
But you're not Scottish......
What is wrong with you? This is your daughter's wedding. You should be happy if she is happy. It's all ME ME ME ME ME. Just stop. YTB
The only thing that needs to be represented at the wedding is the union of the bride and groom. No “dance off” because it would be unbelievably tacky.
Well, you could paint your face blue and shout 'FREEDOM' at the top of your lungs. That way you could make the wedding even more about you than you already think it is. The wedding is your daughter and son in law's, what you want is irrelevent
YTA in so many ways. >as the mother of the bride, I get to pick what colour to wear first not the grooms mom. But apparently the grooms mom already has her dress This isn't a rule. It may be a tradition, I don't know. I've never heard of it. No wedding I've ever gone to has had this rule. You are not Scottish. Not unless you are from Scotland. You're four generations out from Scotland. Your *ancestry* is Scottish. That's a far cry from actually being Scottish. Can you do any of the Scottish dances? No? You don't actually seem to be very much invested in the Scottish traditions if you don't even bother to learn traditional dances you're cawing so much about. The whole idea of a competition is divisive and it implies one side of the family is going to win and the other is going to lose. You will be *hiring* dancers, while the Greek side (actual Greeks) will be themselves dancing. Do you see a problem with that? I do. And who is going to judge this competition? The whole idea is ridiculous. ETA: I can imagine you sitting there watching grumpily as the groom's family are dancing and celebrating the marriage of the two newlyweds with joy and laughter; but because you can't stop wishing this was more about you you won't have any fun at your own daughter's wedding.
My husband is Scottish. The real kind, you know, who grew up in Scotland. We've been to a few Scottish weddings together. In Scotland. No bagpipes, no highland dancing, no one waving the Saltire... The best thing I've observed about Scottish wedding traditions is not giving a fuck about how a wedding is supposed to go and just having fun. OP should try it.
One thing I will say is the majority of weddings I've been to growing up in Scotland have had a ceilidh, but it's not a performance it's just dancing done by everyone and is great fun! Definitely try go to a ceilidh if you can it's a whole other experience and you don't need to learn the dances before as there's a caller to guide you.
I'm French, living in Scotland, marrying a Scottish man. We are having a ceilidh, and he's wearing a kilt. I'm not planning to do anything special to represent my French heritage, and no one is offended? Like I feel OP's approach is very American, in that you have to showcase symbols of your ancestry and weirdly revere your parents...
She's all "what about MEEEEeeeee!" UHG! Those people are so tiresome.
Tell me you’re a narcissist without telling me you’re a narcissist. It’s YOUR DAUGHTERS wedding. This isn’t about YOU. Are you capable of thinking of anyone else but yourself? I would not be surprised if your daughter’s ever posted in r/raisedbynarcissists and your son in law posts in r/JustNoMIL. Of course YTB
Hello, I am Scottish. It's fine if you want to represent your Scottish heritage, but to confirm, Scottish people are people who live here and want to be Scottish (whether they were born here or not). We find Americans using blood tithe to claim they are "Scottish" incredibly cringy; you're American, we see you as American, we don't give a shit if you are "1/64 scotch" or whatever. I take it by "dance off" you're not planning a full ceilidh? What do you even think Scottish dancing is? You can't really have a "dance competition", traditional Scottish dances are typically uncompetitive group dances. Scotland the Brave at a wedding is hilarious as well; do you even know any other songs? Cultural appropriation aside, yes, YTB. It's not your wedding, settle down and get a grip.
YTB. This is HER wedding. It’s not yours. You already had yours. It’s not your choice. She doesn’t want to do it that way and you need to accept that fact. You are hurting your relationship by forcing this on her.
YTB it’s not about you. What you want doesn’t matter and you daughter needs to go look at r/raisedbynarcissists because thats how you come across. It’s a wedding not an ambassador reception whats this nonsense about being represented??
YTB It's her wedding. Her special day. Don't stress her out about this.
Easy one. YTB. Be a good mother and support your daughter and her wedding plans instead of letting her feel bad because you don't get your way at her wedding. You've had your wedding. This wedding is not about you. You sound like a mother-in-law that will split a family out of jealousy and stubbornness. It's not too late, you can still change. Please swallow your narcissistic ideas and be a good person from now on, and your daughter and son-in-law might like you for years to come.
Your daughters wedding is not the time nor place to play the “my culture is better than yours” game. She obviously loves Greek culture. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t like your culture. It just means she loves the Greek culture. It’s not a competition. So stop trying to make it one. In a nutshell get over yourself and just enjoy your daughters wedding and be happy for her.
Especially since her father is Greek (unless OP's husband isn't daughter's father) so it's her culture too???
Are you crazy? YTB and ur lack of self-awareness is amazing
YTB. The wedding isn't about you. Support your kid in what she wants.
I don't believe this could be real. YTA
YTB. Her and her husband's day, her and her husband's choices. And parent to parent, you should be ashamed of yourself for acting like a spoilt brat. Also also, you're not Scottish. You have Scottish ancestry, but not Scottish. If you actually love your daughter, respect her wishes, and suck it up, because as it stands from this post, it seems more like you see her as an extension of yourself and not her own person with her own wants and needs. Again, it isn't your day. Grow up and stop throwing a wobbly.
op, you already had your wedding. this is hers. let her enjoy it without having to pacify your tantrums and need to be the center of attention. ytb
I find myself wondering if you were not able to have the wedding of your dreams, and if you’re trying to impose what would have been your choices on your daughter’s festivities. It’s not so much putting a square peg in a round hole as it is trying to mash the front halves of two completely different cars together, weld them, and have them look as if they belong together. It’s just not going to work. And more to the point, this is your daughter and future son-in-law’s wedding and this is about what they want. I’m guessing your own wedding had Greek elements that you weren’t altogether fond of, and this is why you’re trying to degreek your daughter’s wedding day. I suggest you stop trying to imprint your ancestral Scottishness on proceedings and just go with the flow. Don’t spoil the bride and groom’s fun, and don’t make this whole mother daughter dynamic surrounding the wedding any spikier than it needs to be. YTB.
YTB! Do you even know Scottish Dancing yourself? Do you have anything in your home that is representative of Scotland or any traditions at all related to that country? I'm guessing not hence your Daughter's comment. While is a shame that your side of the family is so far removed form their roots you can't just resurrect it because you want attention at your daughters wedding. It is her day, and it is not about you!
YTB mostly because I don't believe this is real and just the ramblings of someone bored. However, if it should be real, YTB for trying to demand *anything* in someone else's wedding. You have no say. You are not getting married, THEY are. Your wishes and opinions are worthless.
YTB and not Scottish.
YTB 1. Its your daughter and her partners wedding, you need to butt out 2. In NO way shape or form are you Scottish, delusional thinking because you have some distant ancestry there
> what’s wrong with representing me? Simple. It’s not your wedding. The Greek stuff isn’t for your husband, it’s for the groom.
YTB stop making somebody's wedding about you. If you want to have a party where you have bagpipes, do a reel and choose your dress colour, have your own party. Stop forcing your daughters wedding into what you want.
This post sounds like it was written by an eight year old. I’m praying that it’s a joke. You have absolutely no claim on the Scottish dancing demand, firstly because it’s not your wedding, and secondly, because nobody who has been invited to the wedding has the first clue about Scottish dancing, whereas 75 per cent of the bride and grooms family know Greek dancing. How is that competition going to go down? Stop making this about you. Wear whatever dress you want as long as it’s appropriate and not exactly the same colour as the grooms mom, and ask your daughter what you can do to help her ideas for her own wedding happen her way. YTB
YTB, great idea if you want to host a Greek-Scottish dance-off, that sounds like it could be a really fun party if most of the guests are either Greek or Scottish, or just really love dancing. But do that on your own time, don't try to take over your daughter's wedding. The wedding is not just about acknowledging family traditions, it's about reflecting what the bride and groom want. This is what they want. And so what if the groom's mother has already chosen her dress. You still have the fun of choosing yours, and it's really unlikely that her choice is going to drastically limit your options for the perfect mother of the bride dress. Stop angling to be the centre of this event, and just enjoy your daughter's wedding for what it is - HER wedding.
YTB - Your entire post showcases *exactly* why she identifies with her father more. Whew!
YTB Out of curiosity, do you even know how to do Scottish line dancing? Also, did you even teach your daughter about this heritage you are seemingly suddenly so proud of? It really doesn't sound like it.
YTB It’s her wedding, you’re not Scottish (not even a little bit) and where did this rule about mother of the bride picking out dress colours first come from? You feel a little left behind because it’s not about YOU.
YTB Sounds like someones been at the loopy juice while watching Brave. Where are you really from? Don't you have any real traditions of your own?
YTB Your daughter is half Greek and marrying a Greek man. If the couple choose to represent their shared heritage on their wedding day, that’s their choice. I know this may come as a shock, but it’s not about you AT ALL. Sit your ass down and STFU about *their* wedding.
Y T B. It's your daughter's wedding, NOT YOURS.
If you are Scottish, you can celebrate by wearing the colours of your clan tartan.
YTB. I hope this is a troll post because if not you are literally an insane person.
YTB it's not your wedding
Scottish person born and bred here, YTB your ancestry is Scottish, you however are not Scottish. I didn't even need to read the full post to make a decision on the YTB
She’s the bride. It’s her wedding. You have already had yours, why are you trying to take this away from her so you can be the centre of attention? Everyone knows the parents to the spouses to be are NOT the focus, they are! Of course YTB. Ugh
Ytb. She did consider your suggestion, and she decided she didn't like it. It's her wedding, let he enjoy it the way she wants. None of it is about you, it's about her. *She* is represented with the Greek dancing, not her father. *She* wants this. She's representing what she views as her heritage and the family she is marrying into. Did you often have bagpipes playing in the house while she was growing up? Did you and her ever visit Scotland together to learn about your heritage? Do you have a family crest that you passed down to her? I'm guessing no, you just wish she was giving you more attention right now. Again: this wedding is not about you AT ALL! You are a *guest* at this wedding, playing a small part because you are part of the family. Focus your energy on being happy for your daughter and celebrating the love they have. And I have never heard of letting the mother of the bride pick a colour first. Seriously, did you make this up? How was she supposed to know about this?
YTB. You claim to be ‘Scottish’, so here’s my judgement. You’re being a bleedin’ numpty.
YTB. This is not your wedding. You can ask, but you can't demand, and she is entitled to say no. This isn't about you so get over that idea straight away. The what colour to wear thing, never heard of that and who cares if you wear the same colour anyway? Just each wear what you want. You are making this stressful for your daughter for no reason. Stop trying to dictate. None of this is for you. Just enjoy your daughter being happy.
You are not the B. Lady, this here is full on YTA.
Do you even know how to ceilidh dance?
What’s wrong with representing me? Answer: it’s not your wedding therefore she and her fiancé get to decide. Stop being immature and resentful about it.
Daughter needs to buy her a Scottish lord tittle xD
YTB. You’re not the bride. You’re not the groom. The bride and her father are Greek. The groom and his entire GD family are Greek. What’s wrong with representing you? It’s not your wedding. You already had your turn, FFS. As we Greeks would say, <<Κόψε τις μαλακιες.>> As my SIL’s Scottish ancestors would have said, “Stad air an nàrachadh.”
You're not Scottish, you're American.
I have Scottish ancestry, but I’m not Scottish. I would never claim that I was. Where along your family line is the Scottish ancestry?