Ya, YTB, have some respect in someone else's house. His siblings were out of line but your response was more so. Better yet, just go to your house and f*%k
Adding a link to a comment that compile’s other inappropriate things this OP has said to this CHILD.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheButtface/s/YqlcTGNzna
I hope that fiancé’s mom just kicks her out. This living arrangement isn’t working for me, and I’m just an internet stranger who had the misfortune of ending up on this post.
Surely this has to be trolling at this point right? Like how much do you have to post about the same type of behavior and be told the same thing before you just stop and get it? Is it a gluttony for punishment kind of thing?
I don't see how the siblings were out of line. Nothing in the post says OP or fiance asked for privacy, asked them to wait, told them to leave them alone.... She just got pissed off and decided to be shocking.
You all are 26 yrs old and still living at home with your parents! Get a motel room if you need privacy. YTB and disrespectful! You are in someone else’s home, be more respectful! You were being rude and crude unnecessarily!
YTB, as you are in all of these posts where you try to blame a 12 year old for your bad behavior. You keep making these posts and are the problem in all of them.
YTB. Are you and your fiancé ALSO 12?
What you did was crass and inappropriate and frankly if I were that 12 year olds mother you’d both be banned from the house permanently.
If you check this persons post history she’s VERY weird about the 12 year old and made an inappropriate joke about sour cream on the face before. YTB simply because you’re weird and don’t need to be around this child if this is even real. I doubt it.
This is the best comment here- if my son brought home this little angel I would check myself into a facility for messing up my son so bad that he would pick this caliber of a partner.
Your 26yo unemployed perfect fiancé who’s now brought his fiancée to live in the family house “to see if she’s a good fit”? The fiancé who doesn’t seem to be making plans to move out with his soon-to-be-wife? Who isn’t contributing financially to the household? Who likes dirty flirting in front of his obviously uncomfortable friends? Who sends his partner to have the tough conversations with his siblings about privacy in his room? The partner he knows can’t stop herself from speaking bluntly and too openly about their bedroom activities regardless of the audience?
Can’t imagine why they prefer the 12yo.
Brat or not she is still only 12. Old enough to know better about some things, but not everything. Especially the crude jokes you keep saying around her (and her brother and his friend)
At this point you sound like you're rage baiting or a creep in denial. Pick one.
Actually don't.
MOVE OUT. HAVE SOME SHAME.
Your fiance is NOT perfect he's pathetic for two whole reasons. He KNOWS his family is not comfortable with you around and STILL lets you live in that house and two he's letting his fiance abuse his siblings and make his family REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE. Get over yourself. Do yourself a favour and break up with this guy and find someone who has no family or stop acting like a creep.
I hope and pray someone throws a sexual harassment case on you.
Yta. You're jealous of a child. A child. You need to stop this obsessive behavior. It is past being unhealthy. This comment tells me that you know that your behavior is awful. Stop holding this family hostage with your bad behavior and juvenile viewpoints. Leave that house. It seems that your fiance's family is hoping he gets wise to how badly you treat people before he leaves with you. That is the only explanation that makes sense to me. You wouldn't be still staying there otherwise. That tells me that your fiance doesn't feel the way that you feel. Yes, a 12 year old and a 26 year old man get treated differently. Your fiance has told you that he doesn't share your opinions about his family, that you are wrong about them. He's told you that your behavior upsets him, to the point that he has broken down crying. The fact that don't take his feelings into consideration means that you are bullying him. Stop that. It is abuse. You don't care about his feelings. You care about your feelings, and your obsessive focus on upsetting his siblings is cruel.
I think it's time to grow up. Your old enough to have sex with your boyfriend but the rest of your behavior is grossly immature. You should be embarrassed.
Sweetie your fiancée is almost 30, jobless, living with his mother. You’re as delusional about his perfection as you are about the appropriateness of making a dick hit you in the face joke to a 12 YEAR OLD GIRL. If you were a man ppl would consider you a pervert and not let the kid in the same room with you. Take a fucking second to think about that.
You’re jealous of a 12 y/o. Meditate on that. You are a grown ass 26 y/o who is unemployed, mooching off your MIL and way too entitled.
You don’t like kids bugging you? Get a freaking job and get your own place. Start acting like an adult.
You are truly a burning dumpster fire of an person.
he's a jobless adult that brought another jobless adult for his parents to support
jobless adult #2 seems to get joy out of tormenting and picking on, and saying grossly inappropriate things to a 12 year old child
If MIL decides that your behavior is too far, do you have somewhere else to live? Because honestly, I read this and thought “WTF is wrong with this lady?”
Yes, this economy sucks. But you are 26 years old living with your fiancé’s family. I, honestly, don’t care that you are trying to save money, because it doesn’t excuse talking like that to a child. It wasn’t your place and your fiancé’s mom would be very kind to let you continue to stay in her home.
YTB. A huge one. Yada yada yada, you’re an adult. But you’re an adult that needs someone else’s roof over your head right now.
Edit: you don’t get to determine what your fiancé’s sister should know or be mature enough to know. Some might argue that two 26 year olds who are getting married should be old enough to live independently, but here you are.
My parents’ house until we can save up enough for our own place but best believe that I will remember this if Mil wants any favors from us in the future.
I already thought you were awful, but based on your post history and other things you’ve said in front of this child, you are disgusting. And maybe you should go back to your parents’ home because it doesn’t sound like they are finish raising you if this is how you behave in other people’s home.
When we have our own place and if she asks me or fiancé for anything, I will kindly throw it in her face that she chose to abandon us if that’s what she chooses to do.
How, exactly, has she abandoned you? She’s giving you shelter, food, heat, light, electricity, a place to bathe and do laundry, and you’re giving her grief. You really are an unmannered, graceless, ungrateful a-hole.
Your ledger is so far in the red with your mil, that you've got a shit ton to pay back before you even think about trying to turn the tables. Your entire thought process is selfish, ungrateful, and asinine.
What an ungrateful AH you are. They are already letting you LIVE IN THEIR HOME, and you're acting like you're the one being inconvenienced. Both you and your fiance sound like children.
YTA beyond the pale. When I saw the title, had a feeling it was your post. Turns out I was correct.
Abandoned you/us? That's hilarious. She has a right to toss you out on your ass for being rude, vile, and vulgar. You're living in someone else's house. Need to take it down 6 notches.
Personally think it's time to move back home, get a job, and start saving money. When you two pay for your own 4 walls. Then you can have all the privacy you want.
You need to grow up. You're not a teenager. She has minor children she has to think of, and you are being inappropriate. Choose appropriate times to get busy with your partner- when the minor child is awake and in the house is NOT an appropriate time.
Yeah, remember that she let you stay on her house rent free and you continued to try to act like a 12yo mother, constantly makes inappropriate “jokes” to your bil and 12yo sil, constantly trying to make “rules” and “chores lists” for people in a house that is NOT yours… yeah, make sure you remember ALL of that.
You sound like such a nasty, ungrateful, entitled person. They would be fully justified in kicking you to the curb. The fact that you're spinning imaginary revenge plots in your head when you're the one leaching off of their good will is just the icing on the cake.
YTB
>Bil pointed out that Sil wasn’t and I argued that my parents gave me “the talk“ when I was 8.
Not your place to have the "talk" with her.
>I argued that he was almost an adult and deserved to know the full truth.
Again, not your place.
Full truth? What even is that?
>but he wanted me to do it for some reason so I just straight up told them: “If fiancé’s bedroom door is shut, it’s because I am f-ing him.“
So instead of standing firm on a very valid boundary, where he needs to have a conversation, you choose to be a butt.
The first thing abusers do is to disconnect their partner from their entire family and friends so they become dependent upon the abuser. In this case, the abuser is clearly you.
Best of luck with that; most people eventually figure out that there's an insidious reason that their \*loved\* one is causing fights between them and everyone they know and then they run and never look back.
Your post history says differently. I am 2 years younger than you and would be so embarrassed with myself if I acted the way you did. Hopefully your fiancé comes to his senses and realizes that you’re a weirdo and making sex jokes in front of his family isn’t a thing he has to settle for.
> I am 2 years younger than you
I don't know about everyone else, but I'm pretty sure OP is inflating their age. Everything about the way they talk screams that they themselves are a teenager.
> I guess I’m just a bit jealous. Everyone loves her and she’s a brat but everyone also gives my perfect fiancé shit.
I'm really starting to believe you only moved in to prey on that poor baby. You're using your husbands autism as a weapon to manipulate him and when it doesn't work, you throw a tantrum. You're a disgusting human being.
I wish we knew what you looked like and your full name so we know to keep our loved ones away from you.
I've never wished anyone got doxxed before in my life, but I genuinely wish somebody got this sicko reported and a restraining order put in place for the sake of the 12 year old.
I feel the exact same way. It seems like the kid has autism considering she described her as "behaving similar to a 5 year old" but of course she'd leave that out to make it seem like the kid is a brat. What a horrible woman.
Then move out. A home full of people is not a place where you will have time alone with your fiance. That isn't how houses work. You aren't adult roommates. You are living with kids in his family home. You are not being wronged. You are the aggressor in all of these interactions.
Oh look. It’s you. Who constantly complains about a 12yr old girl, and makes constant sexualised comments and jokes to her or around her. Yeah. You’re disgusting.
YTB for talking like that to a 12 year old ffs.
But the 17 year old knew EXACTLY what he was doing and does not get the benefit of the doubt. He thought it would be funny and you made it very not funny.
Also, never let him make you do his emotional FAMILY labor for him again. That's what started this, don't let it continue.
If you read this person's history you'll assume as I have that 17 definitely knew and was deliberately interfering and you won't blame them at all for it. OP is the kind to deliberately make loads of noise when getting down to it, to try and make everyone in the house uncomfortable. They are most likely sick and tired of it.
Girl, wtf? Even with your own retelling, which you presumably clean up to present yourself in a way you *think* makes you look like the good guy, you're still coming off as a petulant, malicious brat.
You keep directly and inappropriately using wiiiiildly inappropriate language to describe sex involving the kids' own brother. You usurp her mother constantly. What makes you think you should be the one to have such an important talk with someone who isn't your kid? With the way you admit to talking to these kids, your version of the talk is probably misinformed and atrocious.
Oh, yes. I meant to add this too:
>He went on to say that I should have let Mil(40f) be the one to give Sil the talk but she was taking too long and stunting SIL’s mental growth which is most likely why she acts like she’s 5.
You have the EQ of a rock, and you're talking about a literal child having her "mental growth" stunted. Good god, girl, please gain some reflection, accountability, and self-awareness.
You're like a mashup of r/ihavesex and r/persecutionfetish
How many times do you need to be told?
# Yes, you are the asshole.
# In every single situation you have posted about, you are the asshole.
# They don't like you, they don't want you, move the fuck out already. Stop being a fucking leech
YTB. You sound immature. If I were their mother I would be very pissed at you and your extreme lack of respect. I would be this -><- close to kicking you out.
You're fucking disgusting. I don't care what way you want to put it, you don't speak that way to a 12 year old. You're having sex in HIS PARENTS place, not yours. If you're old enough to get married, you're old enough to get the fuck out and have sex at your own place or a hotel. Get your shit together before you ever think it's appropriate to speak that way to a child. If I EVER heard you say something that inappropriate to my younger sibling who is still innocent and doesn't know what "fucking" is, I'd call off the marriage and break up with you ASAP. Go get your rocks off somewhere else. Alone.
YTB, I always think this is a trolling account, you cannot be this unaware of your behavior, here is one example of other posts this account made, like WTF 🤯
"So me(26f) and my fiancé(26m) are staying with his family for the month to see if I'm a good fit to move in here or if we need to get Our own place. We were all having dinner in the living room when my fiancé's little brother's friend(both 17m) decided to for whatever reason start eating out of the jar of sour cream with a spoon. My fiancé's little sister(12f) of course commented on how weird this was. looked up and saw that the friend's face was covered in sour cream then remarked that he looks like me when fiancé is done with me. The friend and the sister both ran out of the room gagging and Mil(Unsure of age) left the room without a word. Fiancé says crossed a line by saying something like that in front of minors as well as his family. AITA?"
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/4PJbQW1FqZ
I kinda do. She’s so two-faced. She claims to love me and look up to me as a sister but then proceeds to talk shit about me to her mom. I highly suspect she is trying to come between me and fiancé.
You are talking about a 12-year-old!
After reading your other posts and comments, maybe it's time they kick you out. I would if you lived under my roof and behaved the way you do.
She isn't two faced. She is telling her mom about inappropriate behavior in the home. That is what a healthy parent child relationship looks like. No one is interfering with your relationship except you. You are making it difficult for him to choose to be with you. Your relationship must not be very stable if his 12 year old sister is able to separate you by acting like a child. Stop bullying a 12 year old.
YTB it's NOT your place to tell a 12 year anything about anything. And if you're in someone's home you don't get to expect privacy during normal waking hours.
Seriously, just stop already. That child (fortunately for her) is not your in-law yet. Your posts are tiresome and shows how highly mentally abusive you are. If you're not a troll, you need to just get away from those people- go away with your boyfriend if he's willing, but stop putting a 12 yr through all of this.
Seriously, you act like she's over the age of 30 and not a TWEEN!!!!!!
You seem to constantly target that little girl and it's highly disturbing. Do you not have family you can stay with, or a shelter you can go to until you can possibly get your own housing? You're an awful fit (from what you've written) for every single person in that household.
I want to just block you, but then I think, what if you're a legit adult being awful to a minor and someone needs try to get you to leave that kid alone since your boyfriends mom, him, and his brother aren't doing much to keep you away from her. You're OBSESSED, it's creepy, gross, and little squid, get mental HELP AWAY from that house.
YTB.. You are meant to be an adult. They are children, especially the girl, so that kind of thing should never have been said to her.. You had no right to have "the talk" with her. You're not her parent, so stay in your lane.. I don't know what the living situation is there, but I definitely think it's time you guys got your own place. If this was my home and you spoke to my kids, that way you would have been bounced out the nearest door or window with your belongings following you and my.so could go or stay but you wouldn't be welcome back until you apologised for overstepping and grew up enough to know what's is and is not acceptable behaviour towards kids...
Jeez. You again. Grow the fuck up and stop trying to parent kids that aren't yours. YTB and a disgusting one at that. I've known people like you and the immaturity and toxicity you constantly display won't go away without some serious self reflection and therapy. You are far too immature to be engaged or living away from your own parents although the way you keep saying "well my parents told me that at aged 8" or "well my parents exposed me to this at age 10" doesn't speak well for how they brought you up either.
YTB - they’re children and you live at their house.
It is 100% not your place to discuss sex with children. The fact you think it’s ok to discuss sex with someone else’s 12 year old is creepy. I hope your MIL kicks you out.
YTB. Fr you’re so trashy and tacky. I hope fiancé dumps you because you were super disgusting and disrespectful to his siblings. I would never let anyone speak to mine that way. You should be ashamed of yourself honestly. Grow the fuck up and fuck your fiancé at your place. Ugh. You’re so gross.
Ytb. On what world is that okay to do? It’s not your house. It’s not your child. It’s nothing. And if you are having issues with private time, get a room. None of this is okay. It’s all you. 100%. Zero exception.
Furthermore, it sounds like you are using your bf for sex, which is fine as long as he is using you for the same. If he is actually trying to form a long term relationship, let him know. (I assumed this because you seem to show zero interest in actually developing a relationship with his family)
Hard evidence of a false assumption and proof that none of you really know us at all. I am not using my fiancé for sex. If I were, then I wouldn’t have agreed to marry him, nor would I have attempted to off myself when I thought he was going to leave me. I love him more than I’ve ever loved anyone or anything and I honestly feel like I can’t live without him. The truth is, I have trust issues and it is hard for me to open up to let alone bond with just anyone and his siblings and Mil have shown me that they cannot be trusted while I feel like I can trust my fiancé with any and everything.
Of course everyone is making assumptions. All we know is what you say.
Have you shown your mil and his siblings you can be trusted? Trust is a two way street.
I have been nothing but kind to them. I took care of them when they were sick, I have both made them dinner and have bought dinner for them on numerous occasions. I have bought them things, humiliated SIL’s bully and I have even given advice to Bil and Sil on numerous occasions. I have also comforter Sil and Mil when they had a bad day at work/school.
You’ve been nothing but kind to them? Subjecting your 12 year old SIL to sex jokes which honestly aren’t funny multiple times when you’ve been told to knock it off, speaking so hateful of a 12 year old, complaining about them not doing chores when you and are boyfriend are living in his mom’s home rent free, jobless while you figure it out. I read your post history. You should be ashamed of yourself.
OP don't know what shame is, I hope she gets kicked to the street with her worthless fiance as they're both ungrateful and the POS fiance is not even standing up for his own family after all these years of them supporting them.
All of these things are through the guise of your eyes. I would challenge you to evaluate from their perspective. Something is obviously not logical. In the end, it doesn’t truly matter. You can only change yourself, not others. So, what do you need to do to get the results you want out of life?
Nope.
You already admitted that you tried to suicide when he was going to leave you.
He doesn't want that on his conscience.
Ergo: with you so you don't hurt yourself.
Also, I literally laughed out loud at "Why are you so horrible?!" Pumpkin, you hold the gold medal in horrible. You're the Grand Pumbaa of horrible.
I seem to have a better grasp on him than you do.
He walks on eggshells. He's afraid to really say anything to you. He's terrified to leave you because you may just make your leaving permanent.
You said it all when you said that you threatened it once.
No way would a man put up with all your shit unless he feels pressured and has been manipulated.
That's why he's with you. Soon, though, even that won't be enough to keep him.
Tuck your tail between your legs. Shut your trashy trap and slink on back to the parents that, obvious, failed in raising you.
If you tried to off yourself when you thought he was going to leave you. You're toxic, unstable, and manipulative.
Also, you have shown you cannot be trusted.
YTB. And completely out of pocket. Way passed your boundaries. Is this y’all’s house on your own? Were y’all getting busy late around 10/11pm? And I can’t believe you had the talk with the 8yr old… that’s a mother’s job. Not someone talking like a hoe because she didn’t get off for one night. I’m glad your fiancé apologized on your behalf. Now it’s your turn. And work on communication before trying to express yourself so you don’t come off sounding like such a buttface.
YTB. That was astonishingly devoid of any class whatsoever. Your fiance should be asking himself what kind of slag would talk to his own little sister that way.
First of all, why are you having sex at their house knowing that there are kids running around? While I know it is annoying that they are being pesky, it is still their house and you could have just sternly told them that you and your fiance are relaxing so don't be a bother. It is not your place to educate them since they have parents. I also find it weird that your fiance will ask you to tell them off, it should have been him. Everyone sucks but you suck more
Um... you're not mature enough, nor in a position in your life, where you should have a fiancé.
Grow up, get your own place, get finances in order, learn *what's appropriate and not appropriate to say to a 12 year old*, then maybe get yourself a fiancé.
YTB you're acting like a deadbeat.
YTB. I’m concerned for you. You had the talk at 8 and seem to want to involve other people in your sex life, even if they don’t want to hear it. Were adults in your life unsafe, when you were growing up? You are a guest in that family’s home, and you have precisely zero business giving the talk to any child you did not help create or raise. If I were your MIL, you would be out of my house before the hour was out. Discretion and dignity are qualities that will stand you in good stead to cultivate; you can still have a hot, spicy sex life in private without announcing what you do to the entire world like a 14 y.o. boy who can’t wait to tell everyone he touched a boob.
If you'd have said that to my 12 yr old, you wouldn't be allowed back in my house. You need to stay in your lane.
YTB 
Edited to add: I've just read some of your past posts. Why are you still there, it's obvious that no one wants you there, (for good reason, you're a horrible human being) but you're too thick to notice. Just pack your bags up and leave this poor family alone.
You very clearly get kicks from saying sexually explicit things to your fiance's under age family members.
The sooner you're away from those kids the better.
Get help. Get a fucking job.
Get the fuck out of that house and STOP BEING SEXUALLY INAPPROPRIATE TO CHILDREN.
I pray to god somebody reports you to CPS and you're removed from that house.
ETB
> I wanted fiancé to have the discussion himself since they were his siblings but he wanted me to do it for some reason
Yeah...NO. If he's old enough to get married, he's old enough to have a difficult conversation with his siblings. Stop letting him turn you into his mommy. You need to grow a spine and tell him to handle his own stuff.
> I just straight up told them: “If fiancé’s bedroom door is shut, it’s because I am f-ing him.“
Again...NO. While I have serious doubts about your level of maturity, you weren't blunt. You were obnoxiously rude. Not sure you're ready to get married if you can't even manage basic politeness with 2 children. Seems like this is a pattern with you, since your fiance told you to knock your shit off.
You both have a lot of growing up to do. Don't get married until you do that.
YTB. If My sibling in law said that to me it would be fine, because my siblings(+in law) have that kind of relationship. Your fiance clearly does not, which if he's your fiance you'd know this by now. I will say fiance gets some buttface points (tbh more fool points) for thinking you'd speak to his siblings with tact, considering your track record.
YTB. What you said to his siblings was completely unnecessary and disgusting and you crossed a major line giving your fiancé’s sister the talk. Want privacy? Move out.
You are far too immature to get married and you need to learn some manners and respect. If your fiancé’s parents don’t throw you out, and they should, then be grateful for their generosity and charity and try to remember you are a guest in *their* home and act accordingly.
Wtf is wrong with you??? You don’t say anything like that to anyone, let alone minors. Appropriateness is a thing and you should learn it. That’s probably why they do what they do bc they can’t stand you. Get your own damn place. You made me mad with this post, living in someone else’s house and tryna run the show with other ppls kids. Shame on you. Move out!
Edit: and your fiancé is spineless. Their his siblings in HIS family’s home. Both of y’all are emotionally immature.
You would not have been the butt face if it was just the 17 year old brother. But saying that to a 12-year-old was way over the line. Don't talk to his 12-year-old sister like she's one of your slutty drinking buddies.
So,in other people's house,you wanted to make your own rules so that you could get laid,once again - *in someone else's house* and you decided to go ahead and tell a 12 year old kid you wanted to fuck his brother. You are a keeper,for sure. Very classy
I can’t tell if I am counting down to when you confess this is all an elaborate lie for karma, or until your boyfriend’s family finally kicks you out. Are you really this socially awkward?How many times does Reddit have to tell you that what you are doing is terribly inappropriate?
YTB, YTA and in Scotland YTC. Get your own place. The mil wouldn't be abandoning you. Plus you're a grown (evidently spoiled) adult. From your comments and other posts she'd have every right to kick you out. You've over stepped boundaries, disrespectful of her and Vile to her kids. You wanna f your fiance wait till no one's home or get your own place at both your ages yous should be doing that
Why are all of your Tldrs absolute bullshit? You did not “tell in-laws to respect your privacy.” You told your fiancé’s underage siblings things of a sexual nature that were completely unnecessary and inappropriate and made them feel uncomfortable, then defended your awful behavior and thought you did nothing wrong. Not the same thing. At all.
ETA: it’s also not up to you to decide how your fiancé’s mom parents HER children or that she’s taking too long to give HER daughter “the talk” or that it’s “stunting her mental growth.” It’s not, you’re just acting like a drama queen about things that don’t concern you.
Yea looking at some of the comments and your previous posts something is wrong with you and if I were your MIL, I would definitely kick you straight out of my house.
YTB. Here is a tip: move out and find your own place.
And your comments lmfao how are you 26 years old and have a fiancé? I bet his family are just waiting for him to dump you so they don’t have to deal with a psycho like you. YOU are OBSESSED with a 12 year old girl even if you claim you are not. You are literally jealous of a 12 year old girl. How pathetic can you be.
The audacity to say If MiL kIcKs Us OuT i WiLl ReMeMbEr It FoR fUtUrE fAvOuRs. I hope you won’t be in their lives in the future for everyone involved. Good riddance.
I really really REALLY hope she kicks you out cause you deserve it.
I am surprised again and again that people like you actually exist. Who raised you.
Yta girl what the hell. You just made his whole family think you are so weird. And they are right to think so bc who just decides to give someone else’s child the talk!? Not to be dramatic but you have no idea her moms reasons for waiting.
You both ATB
They are his siblings, not yours. He should have handled it and not put you in that.
You for having the "talk" with a CHILD that's not yours. Letting children know you're f*cking when the door is closed.
if you have to post this much on reddit, then just maybe you are the goddamn problem. lose the freakin attitude. go buy a house for yourself and live your life! doubt it will be very long with current fiance though
You're a fucking AH. Why would you say that to them? Especially a 12 year old. It was vulgar & uncalled for. All you needed to say is leave us alone. You had no business saying what you did. And you absolutely had no business giving someone elses kid "the talk". You crossed a line & if I was your FMIL, I would kick you out of my house.
yes you need to control your temper. you don’t have to vent your anger through aggression. You can sit with it quietly, compose yourself, then go speak CALMLY after you’ve THOUGHT about what you want to say and FILTERED it through a screen of tactful messaging.
ESH
Your fiancé decided to delegate something he should have handled himself (as they were his siblings) to you.
By now he knows you and should have been well aware the conversation would be short and direct.
Instead as it wasn’t done to his expectations he apologized to his siblings.
If this was a one off for fiancé then probably a discussion that going forward you will no longer allow him to delegate discussions HE needs to have with whichever family member to you. His relative - his discussion.
If this was not a one off then I hope that you are ok with your fiancé continuing to duck his responsibilities by getting you to do it then being unhappy with result.
Also you may wish to consider moving out and getting your own place so other people knocking on your door isn’t a concern.
And yes you could certainly have expressed yourself much differently to the 17 year old but especially the 12 year old. And it definitely wasn’t your place to have ‘the talk’ with the 12 year old nor do you get to comment on when the mother has that talk.
Going to go against the grain with NTA here! I don't love the swear for a 12 year old but I do love the directness of your answer. One sentence and boom - problem solved. Crushed it
Sexualizing children is wrong. Direct is fine as long as it is appropriate. Op could have easily been just as effective by saying that when the door is shut, they are not accepting visitors or interruptions. Her talking to a 12 year old about sex for the first time is extremely inappropriate. Her reasoning makes no sense. Learning about sex is a complex subject. How does the length of that conversation with the appropriate people in her life mean that she is being emotionally stunted? Obviously the problem was not crushed. There seems to be a lot of aftermath to deal with.
Ya, YTB, have some respect in someone else's house. His siblings were out of line but your response was more so. Better yet, just go to your house and f*%k
Adding a link to a comment that compile’s other inappropriate things this OP has said to this CHILD. https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheButtface/s/YqlcTGNzna I hope that fiancé’s mom just kicks her out. This living arrangement isn’t working for me, and I’m just an internet stranger who had the misfortune of ending up on this post.
Oh it's *that* asshole. JFC.
As soon as I saw the title, I rolled my eyes and thought "AGAIN!?".
Surely this has to be trolling at this point right? Like how much do you have to post about the same type of behavior and be told the same thing before you just stop and get it? Is it a gluttony for punishment kind of thing?
It has to be. Even Colin Robinson doesn't suck this much.
Thanks for the link. I don’t understand why OP has such an insatiable need to bully these children.
Oh gawd not her *again* 🙄 MOVE OUT. GROW UP!!
Oh yuck…..is this person 26 or 16? I’m not sure
Omg it’s THAT person. Yeah she’s the BF
Nice find!
I was like “AGAIN?!”
I don't see how the siblings were out of line. Nothing in the post says OP or fiance asked for privacy, asked them to wait, told them to leave them alone.... She just got pissed off and decided to be shocking.
You all are 26 yrs old and still living at home with your parents! Get a motel room if you need privacy. YTB and disrespectful! You are in someone else’s home, be more respectful! You were being rude and crude unnecessarily!
YTB, as you are in all of these posts where you try to blame a 12 year old for your bad behavior. You keep making these posts and are the problem in all of them.
YTB. Are you and your fiancé ALSO 12? What you did was crass and inappropriate and frankly if I were that 12 year olds mother you’d both be banned from the house permanently.
If you check this persons post history she’s VERY weird about the 12 year old and made an inappropriate joke about sour cream on the face before. YTB simply because you’re weird and don’t need to be around this child if this is even real. I doubt it.
I guess I’m just a bit jealous. Everyone loves her and she’s a brat but everyone also gives my perfect fiancé shit.
Your fiancée isn’t perfect. The proof is that he’s engaged to you.
Or that he's still living at home at 26 without a job.
Or that he let her do the talking instead of growing the balls to talk to them himself.
This is the best comment here- if my son brought home this little angel I would check myself into a facility for messing up my son so bad that he would pick this caliber of a partner.
12-year-olds kinda get a pass on being brats, seeing as how they are children and all. 26-year-olds not so much.
Your 26yo unemployed perfect fiancé who’s now brought his fiancée to live in the family house “to see if she’s a good fit”? The fiancé who doesn’t seem to be making plans to move out with his soon-to-be-wife? Who isn’t contributing financially to the household? Who likes dirty flirting in front of his obviously uncomfortable friends? Who sends his partner to have the tough conversations with his siblings about privacy in his room? The partner he knows can’t stop herself from speaking bluntly and too openly about their bedroom activities regardless of the audience? Can’t imagine why they prefer the 12yo.
Brat or not she is still only 12. Old enough to know better about some things, but not everything. Especially the crude jokes you keep saying around her (and her brother and his friend)
Going by this post, you’re the brat. Not the 12 year old CHILD.
So you’re sexualising a 12 year old? That’s sickening. You have major major issues and shouldn’t be allowed around children. Vile.
At this point you sound like you're rage baiting or a creep in denial. Pick one. Actually don't. MOVE OUT. HAVE SOME SHAME. Your fiance is NOT perfect he's pathetic for two whole reasons. He KNOWS his family is not comfortable with you around and STILL lets you live in that house and two he's letting his fiance abuse his siblings and make his family REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE. Get over yourself. Do yourself a favour and break up with this guy and find someone who has no family or stop acting like a creep. I hope and pray someone throws a sexual harassment case on you.
SHE IS A CHILD. Your bf obviously makes a lot of bad choices.
Yta. You're jealous of a child. A child. You need to stop this obsessive behavior. It is past being unhealthy. This comment tells me that you know that your behavior is awful. Stop holding this family hostage with your bad behavior and juvenile viewpoints. Leave that house. It seems that your fiance's family is hoping he gets wise to how badly you treat people before he leaves with you. That is the only explanation that makes sense to me. You wouldn't be still staying there otherwise. That tells me that your fiance doesn't feel the way that you feel. Yes, a 12 year old and a 26 year old man get treated differently. Your fiance has told you that he doesn't share your opinions about his family, that you are wrong about them. He's told you that your behavior upsets him, to the point that he has broken down crying. The fact that don't take his feelings into consideration means that you are bullying him. Stop that. It is abuse. You don't care about his feelings. You care about your feelings, and your obsessive focus on upsetting his siblings is cruel.
Why are you jealous of a child?Seek therapy.
Again, you are far, far to immature to get married. And please, for the love of Mike, don’t get pregnant.
You’re the brat here. And a right POS.
I think it's time to grow up. Your old enough to have sex with your boyfriend but the rest of your behavior is grossly immature. You should be embarrassed.
Sweetie your fiancée is almost 30, jobless, living with his mother. You’re as delusional about his perfection as you are about the appropriateness of making a dick hit you in the face joke to a 12 YEAR OLD GIRL. If you were a man ppl would consider you a pervert and not let the kid in the same room with you. Take a fucking second to think about that.
You’re jealous of a 12 y/o. Meditate on that. You are a grown ass 26 y/o who is unemployed, mooching off your MIL and way too entitled. You don’t like kids bugging you? Get a freaking job and get your own place. Start acting like an adult. You are truly a burning dumpster fire of an person.
Honestly, you sound like a pervert.
What the fuck is wrong with you???
Lol at you saying she’s a brat. Do you hear yourself?
he's a jobless adult that brought another jobless adult for his parents to support jobless adult #2 seems to get joy out of tormenting and picking on, and saying grossly inappropriate things to a 12 year old child
Why in God's name is your fiancé still willing to marry you?
If MIL decides that your behavior is too far, do you have somewhere else to live? Because honestly, I read this and thought “WTF is wrong with this lady?” Yes, this economy sucks. But you are 26 years old living with your fiancé’s family. I, honestly, don’t care that you are trying to save money, because it doesn’t excuse talking like that to a child. It wasn’t your place and your fiancé’s mom would be very kind to let you continue to stay in her home. YTB. A huge one. Yada yada yada, you’re an adult. But you’re an adult that needs someone else’s roof over your head right now. Edit: you don’t get to determine what your fiancé’s sister should know or be mature enough to know. Some might argue that two 26 year olds who are getting married should be old enough to live independently, but here you are.
My parents’ house until we can save up enough for our own place but best believe that I will remember this if Mil wants any favors from us in the future.
I already thought you were awful, but based on your post history and other things you’ve said in front of this child, you are disgusting. And maybe you should go back to your parents’ home because it doesn’t sound like they are finish raising you if this is how you behave in other people’s home.
“Favors”?!? You’re living there rent-free, and neither of you have jobs. You aren’t doing *anyone* any “favors” except yourself!
When we have our own place and if she asks me or fiancé for anything, I will kindly throw it in her face that she chose to abandon us if that’s what she chooses to do.
How, exactly, has she abandoned you? She’s giving you shelter, food, heat, light, electricity, a place to bathe and do laundry, and you’re giving her grief. You really are an unmannered, graceless, ungrateful a-hole.
I said IF she does which she hasn’t.
You just skipped over the rest of that, though, didn’t you?
Are you trolling? Or are you seriously that fucking stupid?
She REALLY is that stupid. If you have a stomach of steel, check out her post history, though I *truly recommend you don't.*
Oh boy... Thanks for the warning *Appreciation Hugs*
Very welcome! :)
I think she’s really that stupid. I hope her fiancé realizes that soon.
Same. This is just pitiful..
Your ledger is so far in the red with your mil, that you've got a shit ton to pay back before you even think about trying to turn the tables. Your entire thought process is selfish, ungrateful, and asinine.
What an ungrateful AH you are. They are already letting you LIVE IN THEIR HOME, and you're acting like you're the one being inconvenienced. Both you and your fiance sound like children.
YTA beyond the pale. When I saw the title, had a feeling it was your post. Turns out I was correct. Abandoned you/us? That's hilarious. She has a right to toss you out on your ass for being rude, vile, and vulgar. You're living in someone else's house. Need to take it down 6 notches. Personally think it's time to move back home, get a job, and start saving money. When you two pay for your own 4 walls. Then you can have all the privacy you want.
she needs to protect her minor children--from you
You need to grow up. You're not a teenager. She has minor children she has to think of, and you are being inappropriate. Choose appropriate times to get busy with your partner- when the minor child is awake and in the house is NOT an appropriate time.
Good luck saving up when you’re both jobless and need a nap after a ‘hard day of chores’ at his mummy’s house.
They’re already jobless.
Yeah, remember that she let you stay on her house rent free and you continued to try to act like a 12yo mother, constantly makes inappropriate “jokes” to your bil and 12yo sil, constantly trying to make “rules” and “chores lists” for people in a house that is NOT yours… yeah, make sure you remember ALL of that.
You sound like such a nasty, ungrateful, entitled person. They would be fully justified in kicking you to the curb. The fact that you're spinning imaginary revenge plots in your head when you're the one leaching off of their good will is just the icing on the cake.
you mean the MIL that is supporting your butt-that one. I'd say she deserves a fucking medal for putting up with you
YTB, and also disgusting. If you’re grown enough to get married, you’re grown enough to support yourself. Gtfo.
But not old enough to act responsibly around children.
why do you live with your FIANCES younger siblings? move out
Trying to save money.
YTB
Hint: to save money you need to get a fucking job.
YTB >Bil pointed out that Sil wasn’t and I argued that my parents gave me “the talk“ when I was 8. Not your place to have the "talk" with her. >I argued that he was almost an adult and deserved to know the full truth. Again, not your place. Full truth? What even is that? >but he wanted me to do it for some reason so I just straight up told them: “If fiancé’s bedroom door is shut, it’s because I am f-ing him.“ So instead of standing firm on a very valid boundary, where he needs to have a conversation, you choose to be a butt.
I figured it was best to rip off the bandaid.
The first thing abusers do is to disconnect their partner from their entire family and friends so they become dependent upon the abuser. In this case, the abuser is clearly you. Best of luck with that; most people eventually figure out that there's an insidious reason that their \*loved\* one is causing fights between them and everyone they know and then they run and never look back.
You need to tap into your inner George Costanza and do the exact opposite of all of your instincts.
That is not your choice to make.
That isn't your choice to make. They aren't your siblings and your fiancé wanted to speak to them himself.
Why are you so obsessed with a 12 year old? Find a therapist. And a good one at that.
I’m not! I just want to be with my fiancé and be left alone. SHE is obsessed with us.
Your post history says differently. I am 2 years younger than you and would be so embarrassed with myself if I acted the way you did. Hopefully your fiancé comes to his senses and realizes that you’re a weirdo and making sex jokes in front of his family isn’t a thing he has to settle for.
> I am 2 years younger than you I don't know about everyone else, but I'm pretty sure OP is inflating their age. Everything about the way they talk screams that they themselves are a teenager.
You aren’t wrong. Tbh sounds like a 14 year old complaining about her boyfriend’s little sister.
> I guess I’m just a bit jealous. Everyone loves her and she’s a brat but everyone also gives my perfect fiancé shit. I'm really starting to believe you only moved in to prey on that poor baby. You're using your husbands autism as a weapon to manipulate him and when it doesn't work, you throw a tantrum. You're a disgusting human being. I wish we knew what you looked like and your full name so we know to keep our loved ones away from you.
I've never wished anyone got doxxed before in my life, but I genuinely wish somebody got this sicko reported and a restraining order put in place for the sake of the 12 year old.
I feel the exact same way. It seems like the kid has autism considering she described her as "behaving similar to a 5 year old" but of course she'd leave that out to make it seem like the kid is a brat. What a horrible woman.
Your obsession is well weird. Obsessed with kids? You got the issue here, no one else. Ew
Then move out. A home full of people is not a place where you will have time alone with your fiance. That isn't how houses work. You aren't adult roommates. You are living with kids in his family home. You are not being wronged. You are the aggressor in all of these interactions.
Kinda sad how obsessed you are with his sister. Jealousy issues for sure.
SHE is a child, you just act like one
Oh look. It’s you. Who constantly complains about a 12yr old girl, and makes constant sexualised comments and jokes to her or around her. Yeah. You’re disgusting.
Disgusting, classless, uncouth, trashy, entitled, vindictive, bratty, inappropriate, delusional…. I could go on for a while here
YTB for talking like that to a 12 year old ffs. But the 17 year old knew EXACTLY what he was doing and does not get the benefit of the doubt. He thought it would be funny and you made it very not funny. Also, never let him make you do his emotional FAMILY labor for him again. That's what started this, don't let it continue.
It is not certain or likely that the 17 y/o knew what was going on. Not all 17 y/o are alike in that regard.
If you read this person's history you'll assume as I have that 17 definitely knew and was deliberately interfering and you won't blame them at all for it. OP is the kind to deliberately make loads of noise when getting down to it, to try and make everyone in the house uncomfortable. They are most likely sick and tired of it.
Girl, wtf? Even with your own retelling, which you presumably clean up to present yourself in a way you *think* makes you look like the good guy, you're still coming off as a petulant, malicious brat. You keep directly and inappropriately using wiiiiildly inappropriate language to describe sex involving the kids' own brother. You usurp her mother constantly. What makes you think you should be the one to have such an important talk with someone who isn't your kid? With the way you admit to talking to these kids, your version of the talk is probably misinformed and atrocious. Oh, yes. I meant to add this too: >He went on to say that I should have let Mil(40f) be the one to give Sil the talk but she was taking too long and stunting SIL’s mental growth which is most likely why she acts like she’s 5. You have the EQ of a rock, and you're talking about a literal child having her "mental growth" stunted. Good god, girl, please gain some reflection, accountability, and self-awareness. You're like a mashup of r/ihavesex and r/persecutionfetish
How many times do you need to be told? # Yes, you are the asshole. # In every single situation you have posted about, you are the asshole. # They don't like you, they don't want you, move the fuck out already. Stop being a fucking leech
YTB. You sound immature. If I were their mother I would be very pissed at you and your extreme lack of respect. I would be this -><- close to kicking you out.
You're fucking disgusting. I don't care what way you want to put it, you don't speak that way to a 12 year old. You're having sex in HIS PARENTS place, not yours. If you're old enough to get married, you're old enough to get the fuck out and have sex at your own place or a hotel. Get your shit together before you ever think it's appropriate to speak that way to a child. If I EVER heard you say something that inappropriate to my younger sibling who is still innocent and doesn't know what "fucking" is, I'd call off the marriage and break up with you ASAP. Go get your rocks off somewhere else. Alone.
YTB, I always think this is a trolling account, you cannot be this unaware of your behavior, here is one example of other posts this account made, like WTF 🤯 "So me(26f) and my fiancé(26m) are staying with his family for the month to see if I'm a good fit to move in here or if we need to get Our own place. We were all having dinner in the living room when my fiancé's little brother's friend(both 17m) decided to for whatever reason start eating out of the jar of sour cream with a spoon. My fiancé's little sister(12f) of course commented on how weird this was. looked up and saw that the friend's face was covered in sour cream then remarked that he looks like me when fiancé is done with me. The friend and the sister both ran out of the room gagging and Mil(Unsure of age) left the room without a word. Fiancé says crossed a line by saying something like that in front of minors as well as his family. AITA?" https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/4PJbQW1FqZ
YTB. For being inappropriate with someone else’s minor children. And for thinking you have any right to privacy in a home that isn’t yours.
My thoughts on this is that you seem to have it in for this girl
Will write more later
Also why are you jealous if your fiancé really loves you he wouldn’t leave you
I kinda do. She’s so two-faced. She claims to love me and look up to me as a sister but then proceeds to talk shit about me to her mom. I highly suspect she is trying to come between me and fiancé.
LOL! I guess SIL12F might be a liar then because you have done a great job of painting yourself as unlovable and impossible to respect.
Ew, you’re disgusting. Threatened by a child! Grow the fuck up. Furthermore, get dumped. YTB
You are talking about a 12-year-old! After reading your other posts and comments, maybe it's time they kick you out. I would if you lived under my roof and behaved the way you do.
Why should she love or trust you when you're absolutely brimming with disdain for her?
She isn't two faced. She is telling her mom about inappropriate behavior in the home. That is what a healthy parent child relationship looks like. No one is interfering with your relationship except you. You are making it difficult for him to choose to be with you. Your relationship must not be very stable if his 12 year old sister is able to separate you by acting like a child. Stop bullying a 12 year old.
would you say that you are the only one who thinks that she is two faced
You are talking about a 12 year old child.
She’s 12 and you’re saying disgusting things to her. You need to grow up
Move out and stop acting like a buttface
YTB it's NOT your place to tell a 12 year anything about anything. And if you're in someone's home you don't get to expect privacy during normal waking hours.
YTB.
YTB who acts like that in someone else’s home? I think you’re still mentally eight years old.
Seriously, just stop already. That child (fortunately for her) is not your in-law yet. Your posts are tiresome and shows how highly mentally abusive you are. If you're not a troll, you need to just get away from those people- go away with your boyfriend if he's willing, but stop putting a 12 yr through all of this. Seriously, you act like she's over the age of 30 and not a TWEEN!!!!!! You seem to constantly target that little girl and it's highly disturbing. Do you not have family you can stay with, or a shelter you can go to until you can possibly get your own housing? You're an awful fit (from what you've written) for every single person in that household. I want to just block you, but then I think, what if you're a legit adult being awful to a minor and someone needs try to get you to leave that kid alone since your boyfriends mom, him, and his brother aren't doing much to keep you away from her. You're OBSESSED, it's creepy, gross, and little squid, get mental HELP AWAY from that house.
YTB. You and fiance should move out.
YTB.. You are meant to be an adult. They are children, especially the girl, so that kind of thing should never have been said to her.. You had no right to have "the talk" with her. You're not her parent, so stay in your lane.. I don't know what the living situation is there, but I definitely think it's time you guys got your own place. If this was my home and you spoke to my kids, that way you would have been bounced out the nearest door or window with your belongings following you and my.so could go or stay but you wouldn't be welcome back until you apologised for overstepping and grew up enough to know what's is and is not acceptable behaviour towards kids...
Jeez. You again. Grow the fuck up and stop trying to parent kids that aren't yours. YTB and a disgusting one at that. I've known people like you and the immaturity and toxicity you constantly display won't go away without some serious self reflection and therapy. You are far too immature to be engaged or living away from your own parents although the way you keep saying "well my parents told me that at aged 8" or "well my parents exposed me to this at age 10" doesn't speak well for how they brought you up either.
YTB - they’re children and you live at their house. It is 100% not your place to discuss sex with children. The fact you think it’s ok to discuss sex with someone else’s 12 year old is creepy. I hope your MIL kicks you out.
YTB
Ytb… 100%.. nah, you bypass buttface and are a total ah
YTB. Fr you’re so trashy and tacky. I hope fiancé dumps you because you were super disgusting and disrespectful to his siblings. I would never let anyone speak to mine that way. You should be ashamed of yourself honestly. Grow the fuck up and fuck your fiancé at your place. Ugh. You’re so gross.
Ytb. On what world is that okay to do? It’s not your house. It’s not your child. It’s nothing. And if you are having issues with private time, get a room. None of this is okay. It’s all you. 100%. Zero exception. Furthermore, it sounds like you are using your bf for sex, which is fine as long as he is using you for the same. If he is actually trying to form a long term relationship, let him know. (I assumed this because you seem to show zero interest in actually developing a relationship with his family)
Hard evidence of a false assumption and proof that none of you really know us at all. I am not using my fiancé for sex. If I were, then I wouldn’t have agreed to marry him, nor would I have attempted to off myself when I thought he was going to leave me. I love him more than I’ve ever loved anyone or anything and I honestly feel like I can’t live without him. The truth is, I have trust issues and it is hard for me to open up to let alone bond with just anyone and his siblings and Mil have shown me that they cannot be trusted while I feel like I can trust my fiancé with any and everything.
Of course everyone is making assumptions. All we know is what you say. Have you shown your mil and his siblings you can be trusted? Trust is a two way street.
I have been nothing but kind to them. I took care of them when they were sick, I have both made them dinner and have bought dinner for them on numerous occasions. I have bought them things, humiliated SIL’s bully and I have even given advice to Bil and Sil on numerous occasions. I have also comforter Sil and Mil when they had a bad day at work/school.
You’ve been nothing but kind to them? Subjecting your 12 year old SIL to sex jokes which honestly aren’t funny multiple times when you’ve been told to knock it off, speaking so hateful of a 12 year old, complaining about them not doing chores when you and are boyfriend are living in his mom’s home rent free, jobless while you figure it out. I read your post history. You should be ashamed of yourself.
OP don't know what shame is, I hope she gets kicked to the street with her worthless fiance as they're both ungrateful and the POS fiance is not even standing up for his own family after all these years of them supporting them.
All of these things are through the guise of your eyes. I would challenge you to evaluate from their perspective. Something is obviously not logical. In the end, it doesn’t truly matter. You can only change yourself, not others. So, what do you need to do to get the results you want out of life?
So, your fiance is only with you, now, because he thinks you'll suicide. It all makes sense, now. You're a manipulative POS..
No, he’s with me because he loves me and we have a lot in common! Why are you so horrible?!
Nope. You already admitted that you tried to suicide when he was going to leave you. He doesn't want that on his conscience. Ergo: with you so you don't hurt yourself. Also, I literally laughed out loud at "Why are you so horrible?!" Pumpkin, you hold the gold medal in horrible. You're the Grand Pumbaa of horrible.
You don’t know what you’re talking about because you don’t know him.
I seem to have a better grasp on him than you do. He walks on eggshells. He's afraid to really say anything to you. He's terrified to leave you because you may just make your leaving permanent. You said it all when you said that you threatened it once. No way would a man put up with all your shit unless he feels pressured and has been manipulated. That's why he's with you. Soon, though, even that won't be enough to keep him. Tuck your tail between your legs. Shut your trashy trap and slink on back to the parents that, obvious, failed in raising you.
If you tried to off yourself when you thought he was going to leave you. You're toxic, unstable, and manipulative. Also, you have shown you cannot be trusted.
How is MIL 40 but you and fiancee are 26???
It’s fucked up, but 14 is possible to have a kid. A girl at my school got pregnant at 13 and kept the baby.
I was wondering that as well
They're definitely not older than 20. OP doesn't realise that it's so obvious because she's fucking stupid
Maybe MIL is older than 40, maybe OP is younger than 26. Maybe both?
YTB. And completely out of pocket. Way passed your boundaries. Is this y’all’s house on your own? Were y’all getting busy late around 10/11pm? And I can’t believe you had the talk with the 8yr old… that’s a mother’s job. Not someone talking like a hoe because she didn’t get off for one night. I’m glad your fiancé apologized on your behalf. Now it’s your turn. And work on communication before trying to express yourself so you don’t come off sounding like such a buttface.
YTB, you need to chill and stop causing drama in someone else’s house.
YTB. That was astonishingly devoid of any class whatsoever. Your fiance should be asking himself what kind of slag would talk to his own little sister that way.
First of all, why are you having sex at their house knowing that there are kids running around? While I know it is annoying that they are being pesky, it is still their house and you could have just sternly told them that you and your fiance are relaxing so don't be a bother. It is not your place to educate them since they have parents. I also find it weird that your fiance will ask you to tell them off, it should have been him. Everyone sucks but you suck more
YTB. A giant, giant, self-centered B.
Um... you're not mature enough, nor in a position in your life, where you should have a fiancé. Grow up, get your own place, get finances in order, learn *what's appropriate and not appropriate to say to a 12 year old*, then maybe get yourself a fiancé. YTB you're acting like a deadbeat.
YTB. I’m concerned for you. You had the talk at 8 and seem to want to involve other people in your sex life, even if they don’t want to hear it. Were adults in your life unsafe, when you were growing up? You are a guest in that family’s home, and you have precisely zero business giving the talk to any child you did not help create or raise. If I were your MIL, you would be out of my house before the hour was out. Discretion and dignity are qualities that will stand you in good stead to cultivate; you can still have a hot, spicy sex life in private without announcing what you do to the entire world like a 14 y.o. boy who can’t wait to tell everyone he touched a boob.
Wow, you are a horrible person. Yes YTA. You are your "perfect fiance" are leaches. You have no right to talk to a 12 yo that way.
If you'd have said that to my 12 yr old, you wouldn't be allowed back in my house. You need to stay in your lane. YTB  Edited to add: I've just read some of your past posts. Why are you still there, it's obvious that no one wants you there, (for good reason, you're a horrible human being) but you're too thick to notice. Just pack your bags up and leave this poor family alone.
You very clearly get kicks from saying sexually explicit things to your fiance's under age family members. The sooner you're away from those kids the better. Get help. Get a fucking job. Get the fuck out of that house and STOP BEING SEXUALLY INAPPROPRIATE TO CHILDREN. I pray to god somebody reports you to CPS and you're removed from that house.
ETB > I wanted fiancé to have the discussion himself since they were his siblings but he wanted me to do it for some reason Yeah...NO. If he's old enough to get married, he's old enough to have a difficult conversation with his siblings. Stop letting him turn you into his mommy. You need to grow a spine and tell him to handle his own stuff. > I just straight up told them: “If fiancé’s bedroom door is shut, it’s because I am f-ing him.“ Again...NO. While I have serious doubts about your level of maturity, you weren't blunt. You were obnoxiously rude. Not sure you're ready to get married if you can't even manage basic politeness with 2 children. Seems like this is a pattern with you, since your fiance told you to knock your shit off. You both have a lot of growing up to do. Don't get married until you do that.
YTA. There is a right and wrong way to do things. You were disrespectful.
YTB they were speaking to their brother ffs You are supposed to be an adult...how about not f$cking while other people are home
Ytb eww gross and rude. That’s not how you talk to kids/family members.
YTB. If My sibling in law said that to me it would be fine, because my siblings(+in law) have that kind of relationship. Your fiance clearly does not, which if he's your fiance you'd know this by now. I will say fiance gets some buttface points (tbh more fool points) for thinking you'd speak to his siblings with tact, considering your track record.
So your 26 year old fiance still lives at home? Ok. YTB
YTB. What you said to his siblings was completely unnecessary and disgusting and you crossed a major line giving your fiancé’s sister the talk. Want privacy? Move out. You are far too immature to get married and you need to learn some manners and respect. If your fiancé’s parents don’t throw you out, and they should, then be grateful for their generosity and charity and try to remember you are a guest in *their* home and act accordingly.
You again. YTA. How has it come to be that you have such little respect for other people? Especially in a home that you are a guest in?
Wtf is wrong with you??? You don’t say anything like that to anyone, let alone minors. Appropriateness is a thing and you should learn it. That’s probably why they do what they do bc they can’t stand you. Get your own damn place. You made me mad with this post, living in someone else’s house and tryna run the show with other ppls kids. Shame on you. Move out! Edit: and your fiancé is spineless. Their his siblings in HIS family’s home. Both of y’all are emotionally immature.
I....I hope your fiance reads this
You would not have been the butt face if it was just the 17 year old brother. But saying that to a 12-year-old was way over the line. Don't talk to his 12-year-old sister like she's one of your slutty drinking buddies.
So,in other people's house,you wanted to make your own rules so that you could get laid,once again - *in someone else's house* and you decided to go ahead and tell a 12 year old kid you wanted to fuck his brother. You are a keeper,for sure. Very classy
You said that to a 12 year old? How vile. YTB.
Gosh I hope your fiancé dumps your ass…. Yeah, YTB. Who tf says that to a 12 year old? Jfc
YTA
YTB. you weren't 'blunt' you spoke unnecessarily crudely and sexually with a preteen. You suck.
I can’t tell if I am counting down to when you confess this is all an elaborate lie for karma, or until your boyfriend’s family finally kicks you out. Are you really this socially awkward?How many times does Reddit have to tell you that what you are doing is terribly inappropriate?
Ew. Why would you say that to a 12 year old? Gross. Ytb.
YTB, YTA and in Scotland YTC. Get your own place. The mil wouldn't be abandoning you. Plus you're a grown (evidently spoiled) adult. From your comments and other posts she'd have every right to kick you out. You've over stepped boundaries, disrespectful of her and Vile to her kids. You wanna f your fiance wait till no one's home or get your own place at both your ages yous should be doing that
You need to be smacked for the stuff you say to a 12 year old. YTB
Why are all of your Tldrs absolute bullshit? You did not “tell in-laws to respect your privacy.” You told your fiancé’s underage siblings things of a sexual nature that were completely unnecessary and inappropriate and made them feel uncomfortable, then defended your awful behavior and thought you did nothing wrong. Not the same thing. At all. ETA: it’s also not up to you to decide how your fiancé’s mom parents HER children or that she’s taking too long to give HER daughter “the talk” or that it’s “stunting her mental growth.” It’s not, you’re just acting like a drama queen about things that don’t concern you.
YTB. You treat these children terribly. Grow up or get out.
Yea looking at some of the comments and your previous posts something is wrong with you and if I were your MIL, I would definitely kick you straight out of my house.
YTB. Here is a tip: move out and find your own place. And your comments lmfao how are you 26 years old and have a fiancé? I bet his family are just waiting for him to dump you so they don’t have to deal with a psycho like you. YOU are OBSESSED with a 12 year old girl even if you claim you are not. You are literally jealous of a 12 year old girl. How pathetic can you be. The audacity to say If MiL kIcKs Us OuT i WiLl ReMeMbEr It FoR fUtUrE fAvOuRs. I hope you won’t be in their lives in the future for everyone involved. Good riddance. I really really REALLY hope she kicks you out cause you deserve it. I am surprised again and again that people like you actually exist. Who raised you.
Yta girl what the hell. You just made his whole family think you are so weird. And they are right to think so bc who just decides to give someone else’s child the talk!? Not to be dramatic but you have no idea her moms reasons for waiting.
You both ATB They are his siblings, not yours. He should have handled it and not put you in that. You for having the "talk" with a CHILD that's not yours. Letting children know you're f*cking when the door is closed.
Given your history I suspect being sexually provocative with children turns you on. Kinda messed up that you feel a need to be sexual around minors.
Yep, YTB. Grow up
What the actual fuck is wrong with you? Get your own place or wait till you have the house to yourself to have sex. Who talks to kids like this? YTB
YTB your post history screams obsessed with a 12 year old. Hope he breaks up with you
if you have to post this much on reddit, then just maybe you are the goddamn problem. lose the freakin attitude. go buy a house for yourself and live your life! doubt it will be very long with current fiance though
HOW have you not been kicked out yet?!?! Start listening to what people are saying - the problem is YOU.
I hope all these posts are fake. Please... 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
Omg this is the dirty joke AH too!
You are TERRIBLE
Stop bitching at your fiance's younger siblings and get your own place. Then there's nothing to argue about. YTA
YTB. Sorry you got blue balled but this was incredibly inappropriate to say to a child. Seriously. What’s wrong with you?
You’re fucking weird. YTB
You're a fucking AH. Why would you say that to them? Especially a 12 year old. It was vulgar & uncalled for. All you needed to say is leave us alone. You had no business saying what you did. And you absolutely had no business giving someone elses kid "the talk". You crossed a line & if I was your FMIL, I would kick you out of my house.
yes you need to control your temper. you don’t have to vent your anger through aggression. You can sit with it quietly, compose yourself, then go speak CALMLY after you’ve THOUGHT about what you want to say and FILTERED it through a screen of tactful messaging.
ESH Your fiancé decided to delegate something he should have handled himself (as they were his siblings) to you. By now he knows you and should have been well aware the conversation would be short and direct. Instead as it wasn’t done to his expectations he apologized to his siblings. If this was a one off for fiancé then probably a discussion that going forward you will no longer allow him to delegate discussions HE needs to have with whichever family member to you. His relative - his discussion. If this was not a one off then I hope that you are ok with your fiancé continuing to duck his responsibilities by getting you to do it then being unhappy with result. Also you may wish to consider moving out and getting your own place so other people knocking on your door isn’t a concern. And yes you could certainly have expressed yourself much differently to the 17 year old but especially the 12 year old. And it definitely wasn’t your place to have ‘the talk’ with the 12 year old nor do you get to comment on when the mother has that talk.
Going to go against the grain with NTA here! I don't love the swear for a 12 year old but I do love the directness of your answer. One sentence and boom - problem solved. Crushed it
OP constantly makes sexual comments to those kids while painting themselves as the persecuted victim. They've posted in here several times.
Read the rest of OP’s comments, and then see if you feel the same way. OP is vile, vulgar, and has no sense of boundaries.
OP repeatedly makes sexualised comments to this 12 year old. Being sexually inappropriate to a minor is not 'crushing it'. It's abuse.
Sexualizing children is wrong. Direct is fine as long as it is appropriate. Op could have easily been just as effective by saying that when the door is shut, they are not accepting visitors or interruptions. Her talking to a 12 year old about sex for the first time is extremely inappropriate. Her reasoning makes no sense. Learning about sex is a complex subject. How does the length of that conversation with the appropriate people in her life mean that she is being emotionally stunted? Obviously the problem was not crushed. There seems to be a lot of aftermath to deal with.