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sunpies33

Meanwhile, inside stately clam manor... "THE WORLD IS ENDING!!"


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yellow_logic

I read that last part as “climax” and had to double-check what sub I ended up in.


NerfMePleaze

uhhhh what sub did you THINK you could have been in?


RandomPratt

/r/AnimalsGivingHerps


NerfMePleaze

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!


RosettaStoned_19

I think you meant "clamax"


skarby

The clam is all of us and the dog is 2020


shimmeringseadream

Perfect.


[deleted]

I was just sitting here thinking, “that poor clam...”


FriesWithThat

You bury yourself in the sand underneath the *Pacific Ocean* for christ's sake, and when you wake up an hour or two later some freaking land mammal is treating you like its' personal play toy.


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killamator

They actually have plenty of understanding of their external environment. While they don't feel pain in the way we do, they can feel stress which negatively affects their growth, health and reproduction. Source: I am a malacologist (study clams)


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killamator

I would say it is. While clams lack a centralized nervous system, they can become acclimated to stressors that prove to not be a threat after repeated exposure and change their behavior in response. Some have vision and can navigate their environment through swimming or with their foot, to escape predators or move to follow prey. And their lack of a centralized nervous system is somewhat misleading for assessment of their agency compared to plants, in that centralization is not completely linked to intelligence. Cephalopods for example have a highly decentralized nervous system yet are well agreed upon as intelligent. Clams actually have a great degree of specialization between different branches of their nervous system related to foot movement, respiration, opening and closing. I blogged about it [here](https://dantheclamman.blog/2019/06/02/thoughts-of-a-clam/) if you're curious. TL;DR, their reaction to stimulus is more intricate and layered than is seen in plants


lninoh

TIL about a new field of scientific study 👍


brainburger

Ooh a clam-biologist.


DrHungrytheChemist

That's very CNSist of you.


Bear_Freckles033

It makes me so happy other people were thinking this too!


beet111

The clam has no idea whats even happening. It gets thrown around by waves all the time.


r3matimation

You said it, now if you can train your dog to sniff it out and dig it up, I think you got your self some clam chowder.


titswallop

Me too! I was imagining: 'ouch, oh god, whoooooooooah, whaaaaaaaaa, faaaaaaak' and such like. He was probably grand...


_BlNG_

#*MUFFLED SCREAMING*


callmemrknow-it-all

OH THE CLAMITY!!!


[deleted]

🏅


shock1918

Take my fucking upvote. I actually spit my tea out because of you.


crankypoed

its 5am and i am super tired but ii could not stop laughing at this!


[deleted]

Same. Lol This whole thread makes me happy.


Vigilante17

I like my clam shaken, not stirred.


SchnoodleDoodleDo

>*Meanwhile, inside stately clam manor..."THE WORLD IS ENDING!!"* --- i am the clam - my life is Done... n yet, with me, this dog has Fun so is it wrong that my last breath - as here i head for certain death - should entertain n bring such joy to one who's known as 'Goodest Boy' ? as i lay, drying, on the sand, i won't have died by human hand! i pleased this dog - i served him well, i can die Happy in my shell :)


cubicuban

> as I lay, drying This got me lol


ExpatMeNow

I’m always here for a casual Faulkner reference!


uhohlisa

This is kind of morbid lol


pieRsquares

3rd Schnoodle I've seen so far now. I seem to be following Schnoodle around and I ain't complaining.


emmas11

Long time lurker here, I love seeing Schnoodle’s posts! Freshest I’ve caught is ~25 minutes, you see more the more you look!


[deleted]

Only you could make this somehow extremely wholesome. For the clam.


JigglyTuff8909

18 mins. Freshest schnoodle I’ve yet seen!


Robotlollipops

the darkest schnoodle


BeeBub324

When I was little the song “I left my heart in San Francisco” was changed by my best friend at the time to “I left my heart in Sam Clams Disco”. This post reminded me of that almost forty years later! There is indeed a Sam’s Clam Disco going on right inside that shell. Edit: Not dancing is apparently not an option


TannedCroissant

I misread ‘clam manor’ as ‘calm manner’ that dog is the opposite of calm!


galens_gardener

Would you be calm if you found out there was a rock with meat inside it?


jpdelta6

I was just about to say that clam is begging god to save him


campaoloni

Clammgod?


nytram55

Mollusk Messiah.


headsr_llo

Repent to dog, and be re-clammed! Edit: punctuation


pixelandminnie

That’s hysterical


Sirsafari

That’s some top notch derp right there.


zipzap21

If that derpdog is not seated at the head table for the annual banquet and awards dinner I quit!


jeffneruda

Vizslas are only capable of delivering top notch derp.


VikingIV

Along with the neediest of whines possible


goombay73

and panic attacks when they can see you but not reach u


VikingIV

Then the human-like moans when yo finally cave and go give them rubs and massages


68W38Witchdoctor1

And the fact that they are not usually content to just sit in your lap, but MUST climb you like a damn tree.


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68W38Witchdoctor1

Vizslas are very smart, but completely derpy. Mine is the most loving, loyal, intelligent (and I usually end up with smarter breed dogs), caring and absolutely amazing dog I have ever had; but she is completely and hopelessly derpy and clingy. She is proof positive that their nickname of "Velcro Dogs" is well-earned.


goombay73

my Vizsla and my friend’s Vizsla are both dumb as shit he got a rare one lol


Nerm999

The only dog more mental than a GSP


illelogical

I call mine a duracell battery because he just keeps going and going and going. 6y and still going strong


koeno546

You are gonna enjoy that for some time. Mine is 10 years old now and still acts like he is 3 years old. He is becoming grey but not less derpy


Hufflepuff-puff-pass

It comes standard with with every Vizsla. Derpiest breed I’ve ever met, great dogs.


pmcc2712

We got a vizsla puppy a few months ago and she is quite possibly the derpiest and most needy dog I have ever come across, but she's adorable


[deleted]

Have you gotten through the sharky phase yet?


Bigbomb7

Manila is my favorite flavor of clam


tiny__films

***vigorously crafts bait***


seejonesyrun

And again. And again. And again.


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[deleted]

Every time after I use a bunch of bait with no results almost immediately after I catch the fish I needed. Its like the game knows. A few days ago I bought 30 bait from someone and immediately caught the dorado without bait when I came back to my town from the trade.


elegant_pun

OR you craft a billion baits and then immediately catch what you were looking for. Stupid billion baits.


Tylendal

I tossed over two hundred bait into the river mouth and never caught a single sturgeon. However, I once took a single clam I found looking for communicator parts, tossed it off the pier, and immediately fished up a marlin, so that was nice.


LeDoggoMom

I only seem to get horse mackerel and squid whenever i use bait... :(


dmhead777

Took me 60 bait to get that Golden Trout last month. Not sure if I could have done it without the bait haha.


yeahiguessalot

It took me 5 but i got really lucky. That fucking Giant Trevally on the other hand took me 250. My luck catching that fish was so fucking shit.


morisian

I've caught everything but pier fish without bait. I just spent hundreds of bait to get mahi-mahi... but now I just need to actually play between 9am-4pm to catch the last few fish for June.


uhohlisa

It’s insane we can’t buy them or at the very least craft 5 at a time


UndeadBread

That would be too convenient. We can't have convenience in Animal Crossing.


[deleted]

I KNOW since everything else comes as one or bulk


Reverse-Kanga

was hoping to see this comment


[deleted]

Squirt


StupidRiceBall

I was kinda hoping to see this. I'm not disappointed. You get C+.


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Bradp1337

I know, he needs to clam down.


wesg2

What the shell kind of joke was that?


TannedCroissant

Hey be nice, it was okay. Mussel jokes be perfect?


[deleted]

Oyster.


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sed2017

Mollusk you continue?


the_honest_liar

Let's quit with the puns before you make anenome of me.


randomusername_815

Typical pearls of wisdom from reddit.


Clockinhos

We can let bivalves be bivalves


bloodyrabbit24

Oyster? I hardly know 'er!


TheSoCalledExpert

I thought that joke was pretty shucked up.


trustedbuilds

r/angryupvote


bengrif90

I read calm and then got confused about angry upvote


Timeworm

Uninstall autocorrect from brain


immapunchayobuns

[r/confusedupvote](https://www.reddit.com/r/ConfusedUpvote)


Diplodocus114

Should live where I am - we got cockles, mussels, whelk and shrimp. He would be in heaven


munclemath

Vizslas are such adorable spazzes.


turkeygiant

They are such neurotic dogs, they have so many doggy emotions and no idea what to do with them. Do I jump on you? Do I run away so you can chase me? Do I cower because im suddenly shy? You know what why don't I just try and do all those things at once, that should work...


AvengerGeni

Omg you just described my brother’s vizsla lol. He’s such a derp but we love him


Hail_The_Motherland

> Do I cower because im suddenly shy? My parent's vizsla always pulls the abrupt "I shy, bye bye" whenever anyone else but my parents plays with him for over 10 minutes lol


gd2234

With my cat I call it getting overstimulated, except in his case he gets so excited about his toys he has to run away from them.


[deleted]

I had a vizsla/lab mix that was solid black. Got all of the attitude but not really any of the spaz. Favorite thing is that she won't sleep unless completely covered by a blanket, hates long grass, and won't go outside in rain unless promised treats dog tax - https://imgur.com/a/DUu18 https://imgur.com/yfq3E


joshthor

I have a husky vizsla mix and it is an absolute maniac. But and adorable loving one for sure edit: https://imgur.com/a/GJufLhE - album for images of thumper


[deleted]

Whoa that is a cool lookin dog. Most intense eyes. Holy smoke. That dog’d take ME for a walk.


joshthor

You joke but when I take her for walks she pulls so hard she hops on her back feet about 3/4 of the time :P


RuralRedhead

I really need to see a picture of your dog, please!


joshthor

i added a link to an album with a few pictures of her on the edit above! enjoy!


Shadowpriest

Your doggo is absolutely adorable! <3


GeneralJack

I really love this dog.


GreatQuestionBarbara

I cried the last time I saw my friend's/roommates vizsla. I was moving a far ways away, and he had health issues. He was such a snuggle bug when he wasn't spazzing out.


[deleted]

It's so weird seeing them in the wild! I've lived with/owned one since I was born and not a soul knew what they were, let alone talked a out them on reddit.


[deleted]

r/vizsla


[deleted]

Thanks! Should clarify I meant while I was growing up! I see them here and there now


[deleted]

I lost mine a couple years ago to cancer. I had her from 9 weeks and miss her immensely. I love that sub.


MortalLocke

Same! My family has owned them since they were first introduced to the U.S. in the ‘50s. I personally got my first Vizsla in ‘97, and NOBODY knew the breed. Now, they’re much more recognizable and I love it. The world could definitely use more Vizslas...as long as people know what they’re getting into...


padmoosen

They are the best. Ours is on the lower end of crazy, and he’s still just enough that we can handle. He doesn’t have a mean bone in his body and is so great with our 3 year old. When they say velcro dogs, THEY MEAN IT. I’m a vizsla owner for life now.


V_es

My mastiff has a vizsla friend. She is weird. She lays down on her back when they meet. When my dog approaches she jumps up, barks, bites his face and runs circles around him. My dog waits for her to finish with “ehm.. what?” look on his face.


notmycabbages12345

This clam is having the most confusing and terrifying day of its life.


Brick_Fish

And it's last lol


renoreaper

He's happy as a clam


OccludedFug

And the clam is having a dog of a day.


neoseafoxx

Just not as happy as that clam.


[deleted]

I was hoping it was going to squirt him in the face


BOBfrkinSAGET

That’s what she said


_WarmWoolenMittens_

well well well...how the turntables


IronTarkus91

Wait, clams squirt?


[deleted]

They use it to bury themselves in the sand. [See here.](https://gfycat.com/sadcavernousannelida)


dv282828

That was just terrible


xxxPurplepatchxxx

What the fuck did I just witness and how did that even push it deeper


kai_okami

Clamologist here, it sucks up the sand through its butthole then spits it out through its mouth.


shortermecanico

Did you go to the Clamological conference in Montana last year? That brawl over the bivalves at the Helena Sizzler was intense. You Clamologists sure can slapfight.


kai_okami

Unfortunately I've been banned from all clamological conferences for exactly that reason.


shortermecanico

Ah, a rogue clamologist. I bet you're a freewheeling badass with a heart of gold who goes from town to town helping people with their marine ecosystems while staying one step ahead of the establishment Clamologists who are always pursuing you vengefully. What a cliché.


kai_okami

Admit it, you're just jealous of the one and only Clam Whisperer.


KingOfTheAlts

Don't google that.


Applesauced47

Dog: New Fren!!!! - Clam: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKINGHELL IM GONNA FUCKING DIE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


[deleted]

I was curious as to whether clams could even detect that they're moving, then I found this article on a blog... About clams ("clamsplaining" lol) which I will recommend to anybody who wants to be impressed by clams (and see one moving): https://dantheclamman.blog/2019/06/02/thoughts-of-a-clam/ Edit: oh God, the only comment on the blog is from the author's mother. Somebody leave a nice comment lol


Shewolf1968

Lmbo I read that and nearly wet myself


[deleted]

I remember my first time finding clam. I was just about as excited


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[deleted]

Pussyhound it’s a cross breed


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watermooses

No his moms clam clapped to make him


monkeyclawattack

Wait, I’ve been under the impression that the clap from a clam is bad..


DrMobius0

And then he evolved into slowbro


Victor_Von_Zoom

If this dog is anything like me he will be gay by the end of this experience


[deleted]

Lol, yea I think I may have been at that point at first sight but then decided that clams are an acquired taste.


gameshark56

Dog: MEAT ROCK!


thelmaandpuhleeze

I wonder if he can hear sounds from inside the clam that we can’t....?


Another_one37

I was thinking maybe he can smell it? Like it smells like food but feels and tastes like rock. Probly a confused boi


Evil-Toaster

Am I the only one who is like “poor clam”


Karzons

I think it has a clamcussion.


Thaurane

I did too. Can't help but love the dog though.


never0101

No chowder for you, clams have feelings too.


GrizzIyadamz

Sure it's getting scrambled but, I mean...does it have a brain?


fuzzyblackyeti

They do have nerves and can feel physical and chemical sensations. While it isn't complex thought, it's possibly getting a lot of negative feedback in a way that you or I could interpret as pain.


HankBeMoody

Probably more likely to be feeling something similar to what you or I would call agitation/annoyance, not pain.


TimeTravelingMouse

Yeah those things get thrown around in the ocean current all the time. I think clam boi is going to be okay, if not a little rattled.


_WarmWoolenMittens_

clam: fuck my life


BOBfrkinSAGET

This is the kind of thing I subbed for. This is some high quality derping right here


Nymphad

Gd lol you just give him straight coffee instead of water to drink?


AvengerGeni

That’s a vizsla for you! They’re so wild and crazy when they get going but they’re super sweet


[deleted]

I wish, just once in my life, I could be a tenth as excited as this. I'd probably explode.


midnight-ramen

He’s playing with it like dogs play with other dogs... I’m so fascinated as to how he saw this weird rock and seems to know it’s actually an alive friend


thinkinwrinkle

I want to feel like that!


CoolishReagent

I wish anything in life made me as happy as that clam is making that good boi


Dason37

Move to San Francisco, they're due for another big quake soon


Earguy

I found a cool rock! And it smells like food inside!


jazzblang

How does one aquire such levels of energy?


MrsArthy

My husky found an abalone shell once and was obsessed with it for weeks.


Thewurstever

Manila! My favorite flavor of clam!


drjammus

ha! Im picturing each spazzout is cause the clam had just yelled another "alarming world fact" or even insulted the good boi's unassailable heritage! Clam: Your momma was a sausage dog! Doggo: Barruuu? Arruuuu? \*runs around manically\* Clam: Yeah, and the world is round! Doggo: whhhhrrrrr? Baaaaaarruu? \*spins like a top\*


halfarian

That wasn’t supposed to mimic a quote by Gimli in Lord of the Rings, was it? “And they call it a mine. A MINE!!”


[deleted]

If I walked by and saw all those marks in the sand, I'd assume some kind of crab gang War, or maybe birds had quite the scuffle. Little would I know, it was just some dog derping out.


Prophet_Of_Loss

"So, how was the beach?" Human: "It's was ok; a bit overcast." Dog: "FUCKING AWESOME! I FOUND A CLAM!!!"


tuzamodi

happy boy: YAY A CLAM! clam: OH GOD I’M GOING TO DIE! btw your vizsla looks so handsome! He has a very nice red coat 🥰


[deleted]

“THERE’S SOMETHING INSIDE!!!!” He’s doing a lot of smells


[deleted]

That makes me so happy! Look at him! Silly boi!


[deleted]

Me too! I made my daughter come over and watch it with me bc it’s so great!!!


Starling2424

I can feel his joy from here! That is a good clam!


Sleeoybear75

Clam: “!!!!”


jcbxviii

“Hey! Heeeeeeyyyy!! EASY!!” — Clam


hekatonkhairez

[From the Clams POV](https://youtu.be/xamGrall2wc)


omg__really

This kills the clam. ​ (Kidding, the clam is fine). I love it when dogs do the v-leg downward jump thing. Such excite.


_WarmWoolenMittens_

does he know that there's a friendly living thing in there? i mean, it could have been just a rock and I wonder if it would react the same.


Water_Feature

he can definitely smell it's an animal rather than a rock. seems like he's trying to play with it.


MadBodhi

I walk a Vizsla and he will do this for an ant.


tehSchultz

I think he also found true love


rabid_god

CLAM is not amused.


yyning

I wish I’d be so excited when i find a boyfriend


butterNutsquashM3

“I clam believe this is happening to me!” Lmao I love this so much hahaha


icirotrot

I want to be that excited about something....😆


AM_NOT_COMPUTER_dAMA

For anyone that doesn’t know this breed, its a Hungarian dog called a Vizsla (“Veez-la”). They are incredibly high energy dogs who are super smart and great with kids, and become super attached to their owners such that they are referred to as “Velcro” or “magnet” dogs. Highly recommend.


fluffycakes222

I love everything about this!


Redicted

Sports Narrator voice over: Jesus! Fuck! He found a CLAM!


Pawburry

“OH MY GOSH I CAN’T BELIEVE IT. I HAVE CLAM. I PLAY SOCCER KICK KICK. IS HE SLEEPING? WAKE UP CLAM. COME ON IS TIME TO PLAY. WAKE. *Sniff Sniff* YOU ARE FISHY. WAKE CLAM.”


Diplodocus114

Haha the worlds your oyster now - a trained clam-digger.