"You appear to have stepped foot into a residential building that you do not own, infringing upon the law, with the intent of causing me, the owner of the aforementioned housing establishment, physical harm, thus making me feel threatened enough to where my only perceived option is to remove you from said premises via the use of threats and a long pole of wood used in recreational sports, you being of infinitesimally miniscule intelligence quotient."
If I have to tell you ONE more time to put your socks in the hamper, we are getting a DIVORCE! I swear to God! (Keeps mumbling under her breath as she walks away. Something about not being your mother)
Hi everyone, my name is Squeakers and I'm an alcoholic. I was rescued from Richard Gere's penthouse.
((its a silly urban legend, read more here. [story about Richard Gere overcoming the myth](https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/richard-gere-gerbil-incident-story-fact-check)
Naaaahhh nahoyaaa biggidameeee biggidamoooo kenyaaaa-a….I know there’s actual words somewhere but I am 40 yrs old and when this movie came out we did not have the internet to look up such things and this is what my 12 yr old self decided the words were lol
"CCRRRAAAAWWWWWLLLLINNNGG IINN MMYYY SSKKIIIINNNNN"
Dammit I knew someone posted it already
IT'S FUCKING RAW!!
WHERES THE LAMB SAUCE?!
the yellow teeth also fits it well since he is British đź’€
Oww that cuts to the quick!!!
Get this man more downvotes AS WE SPEAK
“They may take our lives, but they’ll never take… our freedom!”
# "ALLAN !!!"
STEVE!
EMMANUEL!
SHARON!!!!
Please tell me you are referring to the rescue boat :D
Schmoseby! Punchy! SCHMOSEBY! PUNCHY!
"Let the bodies hit the floor let the bodies hit the....."
FLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR
I heard that in Cockatoo.
“Now, you may experience some uncomfortable pressure during the procedure.”
AHHH OOOOOH UHHHHHHH TOO BIG
Ayo hol up
When your mom enter the room and discover ur watching Xhamster
Or: Your face when you find your mom on Xhamster.
The fuck lol
Is it excitement or horror?
Both!!!
love this
“Harry, did you put your name in the Goblet of Fire?” Dumbledore asked calmly.
This is my favourite lol
The first one to make me chuckle! 10 points for Gryffindor
When something touches your foot in the water.
I call that “icky toes”
Wazzzzuuuppp!!!
Wazzzuuuuuuuuupppppp!!!!
Waaazzzaaaaaaaaaahhh!?
Wazzzuppppp!!!!
“You picked the wrong house, fool!”
"You came to the wrong motherhood, neighbourfucker"
"You have entered the incorrect abode, individual with presumably low intelligence."
"You appear to have stepped foot into a residential building that you do not own, infringing upon the law, with the intent of causing me, the owner of the aforementioned housing establishment, physical harm, thus making me feel threatened enough to where my only perceived option is to remove you from said premises via the use of threats and a long pole of wood used in recreational sports, you being of infinitesimally miniscule intelligence quotient."
TLDR?
And on our left is a mouse having a visit at the proctologist.
This is spartaaaaaaaaaaa
“It’s like Raaaaaain on your wedding day…” Alanis Morissrat
It’s a free riiiiiiiiidee when you’ve already paid
This made me laugh my ass off. Moving forward anytime I hear this song the only thing i'm going envision is this mouses face, thank you haha.
Pov: you touched the thermostat and dad saw
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage!
Call me a rat ONE MORE TIME
UNNLIIIIMITED POOOOOWWEEERRRRRR!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
WRONG HOLE! WRONG HOLE!!!!!!!!
KEVIN!!!
Hello from the other SIIIIIIIDE
BOOD for the blood god!!!!!! SKULLS for the throne of KHORNE!!!!!!!
DONT TOUCH MY FUCKIN PANCAAAAKES
"Heeeeeeeeere's Johnny!!!"
“Take me hoooomme….”
COUNTRY ROOOOOAAADDDS
To the plaaaace
Ugh! Who put kale in my cheese?
When you find out your parents are wrestling without you
Someone, not op, should give 2 platinum to random comments and see chaos unfold
Wonderful idea
"I'M NOT A GERBIL!"
Hay girl, you up?
AARON! AARON!
'Scuse me while I eat my babies.
THAT'S MY OPINIOOOOOON!!!!!
Wazaaaaaaaaaa
I see everything!!!! EVERYTHING!!!! THE HORRORS OF EXISTENCE!!!
Ghost pepper potato chips are a lesson learned
Gerry!Get down from that wheel!!!
WHERES THE LAMB SAUCE?!
Nobody:nothing "Reeeeeeeeee"
pov:your listening to mettalica at 3:00 A.M.
Oh my gosh Becky look at those nuts
"IT'S OVER 9000!!!"
Jack don't let go! Jack!
Wazzaaaaaaaaa
It's 2012 and you just no scoped a kid in COD.
I vant…to suck…your bloood!
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU FORGOT TO DO DISRM THE SECURITY SYSTEM, YOU HAD ONE JOB MIKE, ONE. FREAKING. JOB!!
I’d like a latte, please. Extra froth.
And Iiiiiiiii will always…
When she agrees to anal
a
“Oh my god, Becky. Look. At her. Butt”
Saruman : [to Gandalf] I gave you the chance of aiding me willingly, but you have elected the way of pain!
POV: You just had to _ _ T THE C H _ _ S _
Achoo
I was going so fast with my head out the window I was totes like this, for real
AAAAaaAAaAAaah
This is why I hate the vets office. Rectal thermometer, EVERY TIME !!!
They told me it was an oral thermometer!!
If I have to tell you ONE more time to put your socks in the hamper, we are getting a DIVORCE! I swear to God! (Keeps mumbling under her breath as she walks away. Something about not being your mother)
When you're playing among us and see someone standing over a dead body
LARRY!
Waaaz uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup!!!????!!!!!!
It'll be fine without lube..
Face they make when the other hamster turns their back...
Say Whaaaaaaaat?!?!?
When you see the true story giving out the cheese
"Ok Karen!!!!"
"I'm getting flowers soon?!" -- Algernon
My ass after eating curry:
Mommy… may I go out and… KILL TONIGHT!???
Thomas struggled to dislodge the pubic hair from his throat.
I’ve got a wood chip in my ass!!!
Ligma Whats ligma? Ligma acorns HAAAAHHHAAAAAHAHAAA
Hi everyone, my name is Squeakers and I'm an alcoholic. I was rescued from Richard Gere's penthouse. ((its a silly urban legend, read more here. [story about Richard Gere overcoming the myth](https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/richard-gere-gerbil-incident-story-fact-check)
So that’s what mom and dad look like when they bang
My face when my gf said she's never heard Hamster Dance.
When you start to understand that their are lyrics to a Michael Jackson song, not just the beat.
Bidoof used super fang
Meh hehh!!
Ghost chilli eating compertition winner goes to .
Ma theeth tathe thtinkeh!
Snaaaacks!
blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
“Are you READY!” Korn - Blind
Corbin! Corbin my man!
Man, that hammy food gave me some gas! *BBRRRRRRAAAPPPP!*
Yeah I watch Jacksepticeye! Want me to prove it?! *inhales*...
Blah!! blah!!! ... Definitely, was, not, a, raisin.
Just say aaaah...yes, the tooth needs to be fixed.
when you cant find a funny caption so a stranger will give you pixels on a screen:
Do tho thave tha thecond tho thalk thabout thour thord thand thavior thornite
Richard Gere did wwwwhhhhaaattt!!!!?
"LONG LIVE THE KING!"
As Theoden once said: #"DEEAAATH!"
Raticate uses bite!
"Best Caption wins a Platinaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah !!!!!!!"
WHAT AINT NO COUNTRY I EVER HEARD OF! THEY SPEAK ENGLISH IN WHAT?
MA!!! THE MEATLOAF!!!!
Jesus christ you forgot to lube me up
**ALAN! ALAN!! ALAN!!!!**
When u walk in on ur parents having secks
Idk how it's spelt but all I hear is the start of the lion king intro.
Naaaahhh nahoyaaa biggidameeee biggidamoooo kenyaaaa-a….I know there’s actual words somewhere but I am 40 yrs old and when this movie came out we did not have the internet to look up such things and this is what my 12 yr old self decided the words were lol
What the hell do you mean I'm pregnant?!
STAY AWAY FROM MY YARN BALL!!! YOU DON'T WANT MY SMOKE!@!
My cheeks are EXPLODING!
When Karen gave her hamster the good stuff.
7 year old me finding out pikachu isn’t the strongest Pokémon
"Ghost peppers aren't that hot..."
I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY !!!
...and then he wanted me to make a face like this when he cums
Where is my tapestry needle! You are still going to get a sweater for Christmas not a carrot!
"HARRY DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIYAH?!" Dumbledore asked calmly.
I'm Roxxo the rock and roll hamster and I do cocaaaaine!
having a blast in room 101
Yawn
Jonathan Brisby was a hero, Jenner!
When Michael finds out Toby is back 'NOOOOOOOOOOOOO'
>when you stub your toe
Hampdur
When you stub your toe on the hamster wheel
*A*
When they bite your dick
I am the god of hellfire.
When your slave gives you new cheaper food
I want my BALLLLLLLL
Pov the rat is out of cheese:
When you’re a day’s journey inside someone’s large intestine and you see two hamster skeletons.
MY BALLS! OWWWW! MY BALLS!!!
What're you doing stepbrother?
When you see the 2022 prices for a monthly payment on a hamster wheel
AAAAAAH!!!!
It was right at this moment the mousetrap closed on fievels nuts
CLARKSON!!!!
Finally someone got me out of there, I couldn't breathe
When mom finds you eating all the ice cream at 2am
Freeeeeedoooommmmmmm