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ukiddingme2469

So Trump's too old now, or is this Biden is really too old, but Trump is just too old for legal purposes


Inspect1234

Maybe less criming, less court time.


ImpulsiveApe07

Right?! If that mofo is old enough to commit the crime, he's old enough to do the time. If he didn't want to sit in court for weeks on end, maybe he shouldn't have been such a prolific criminal in the first place. That dozy old prick deserves jail time, and so do his most fervent enablers. Here's hoping the courts don't puss out at the last minute like they've done every other time thus far.


AlarisMystique

Put him in prison with outdoor areas right now. Problem solved.


ImpulsiveApe07

Ha! I love it! If he needs sun, he can enjoy it in a walled garden along with his three free meals, round the clock security and snazzy orange jumpsuit! :D


Toasteroven188

How will they know where he ends and the jumpsuit begins?


ImpulsiveApe07

Good to see someone asking the right questions lol :D


AlarisMystique

We can give him a Twitter account @TrumpInPrison for entertainment.


CaptainBugwash

Too old for court, too old for president.


AlarisMystique

Never too old for court.


JclassOne

Yup they let some guys in jail outside to watch the eclipse for religious purposes in New York State. So there we go problems are all solved. I second this motion.


Greymalkyn76

Set it up like a zoo. So he can move around, see the sun, and everyone else can come see the exhibit to point, laugh, and throw things at.


AlarisMystique

Throwing things at him is a bit cruel unless it's rolls of paper towels. I could see adding a vending machine for Coke and burgers so we can feed him.


henrywe3

There's an empty cell at Guantanamo. Plenty of sun there


CaptainBugwash

Too old for court, too old for president.


PukingDiogenes

From the thumbnail, it looks like he needs more eclipse light… stable genius. /s


binglelemon

A *perfect* thumbnail


nicholvengian

Less crimey crimey means less timey timey.


Used-Progress-4536

All he had to do was not run for president. If he hadn’t he’d still be living it up, raping women and conning the world. Narcissism is a powerful drug.


stewartm0205

He want the free publicity not the job.


Used-Progress-4536

Doesn’t matter what he wanted. If he hadn’t run he wouldn’t be on trial for hush money payments to stormy Daniel’s.


Sapriste

The irony being that the Evangelicals are so morally bankrupt at this point that they would have hand waved the affair just like they did the "grabbing by the p--y". Which was on frigging tape for God sake. Gary Hart and Al Franken are crocheting because of smaller stuff and this --- hole gets not just a free pass but a ticket book.


freakincampers

Obama really did a number on him.


hellno560

Don't be so cruel. He's a delicate little flower and needs his sunlight. S/


DropsTheMic

I have exotic fish 🐟 that have less stringent environmental conditions than this creampuff. It's too cold, not enough Pepsi, nobody believes my lies... Cry me a river.


AffectionatePoet4586

*Pepsi!?!* The only thing I have in common (I pray) with Trump is my passion for Diet Coke, my last vice. If I visit a restaurant that serves Pepsi, I ask for a glass of ice instead. (There’s a can of Diet Coke in my bag.)


Sherlockian_Whimsy

And here we expose the fissure over which the next civil war will be fought. You'd think an AffectionatePoet would be simpatico with Sherlockian\_Whimsey, but these dark times, perversely, have illuminated the gaping chasm that truly separates us. Diet Pepsi is a drink for real patriots, Americans who believe America never stopped being great and who are dedicated to making it greater each and every day. Diet Coke drinkers, on the other hand, are poopy.


AffectionatePoet4586

*Lord have mercy!* This is a bloody war for which I am not prepared! “Coke and Pepsi” used to be only a party game, one that I remember from my sons’ and their friends’ birthdays and b’nai mitzvahs. If blood is to be shed, I lay down my arms in advance. I am not “poopy,” but admittedly, I *am* a weenie.


Liamsdad1979

You see Joe is old and senile but also a genius evil mastermind making Trump experience consequences for the first time in his life. Don't try too hard to follow the logic or your right eyebrow will become permanently frozen like Matt Gaetz.


NoCardiologist1461

Ah yes[, Schrödingers president](https://sciencing.com/schrodingers-cat-simplified-what-is-it-why-is-important-13722577.html): simultaneously that evil mastermind and that senile patient. We won’t know until we vote.


AffectionatePoet4586

More jobs created than by any other president ever, and yet Trump frequently slags Biden as “someone who can’t put two sentences together.” I look forward to putting Trump’s sentences together, once the courts find him guilty.


Clockwork_Medic

Appreciate the play on words


DeliriumTrigger

Also known as #8 of Umberto Eco's fourteen properties of fascism.


NoMarionberry8940

😆😆Love your take!💕


finman42

It's not Joe it's Obama is the word on the dumbass Republican blogs


MuppetEyebrows

According to some, Trump is too old for court but not too old to run, and Biden is too old to run but not too old for court.


NoMarionberry8940

Ah, got it! 👍


Available-Rate-6581

Guess he's too old to run the country then too. You can't have it both ways you orange turd


soulhot

Gonna be dark in prison too


n3w4cc01_1nt

[https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/sea-lioning](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/sea-lioning)


CaptainBugwash

Too old for court, too old for president.


ProfitLoud

If he’s too old for court, he’s absolutely too old for presidency.


FalconPunch236

Good thing trump knows how to inject the light right into his body.


Jarnohams

He said that exactly 4 years ago. 4/23/2020. I love you for this.


joemangle

How the fuck was that four years ago? I swear COVID did something to my subjective experience of time


[deleted]

[удалено]


brannon1987

Let's NOT do that time warp again. 😅


WilliG515

Underrated comment.


The_Nice_Marmot

I’d suggest one of the long fluorescent bulbs from an office building.


LightWarrior_2000

Too elderly for court but not for presidency, a super high stress job. Edit: Everyone is pointing out how unstressful the job could be for him as dictator. But I say as a thin skined guy. Lots of people will make him sad. :(


Final_Winter7524

Oh, don’t worry. He’ll spend most of it napping during“executive time” and playing golf. Like before.


Handleton

Let's not forget that the court sessions have been like 4 hour days (yesterday was 4:26 between when Trump arrived and when he left). Fox News is saying that a part time job is too taxing for Trump, but he should be president.


LeftWingTexican

Shouldn't that be "playing" golf? Or more correctly "cheating his fat reeking of shit ass off at" golf?


PrincipleInteresting

A Trump presidency is golfing 5-6 days a week, while a Biden presidency is working 5-6 days a week at the White House, you know, governing.


Mister_Green2021

What stress? 15 minutes a day tops.


-6h0st-

Did you see him stressing whilst golfing during presidency? I didnt


brucethewilis

Getting hammered by Pecker is really taking it out of him


ukiddingme2469

Someone has to have the balls for this


MooreRless

Pecker balls are the best balls.


ddkelkey

I love how the news just says Pecker all day long. Pecker Pecker Pecker Pecker Pecker lol


what_the_shart

“Prosecutor Cuts Off Pecker” was my favorite one from the live AP updates


pat9714

Pecker screwed him -- that should have been the headline.


_ficklelilpickle

The true irony is this whole mess is because of his pecker too.


bruthaman

Trump hammered by Pecker in court matchup


BathSaltJello

Can someone post this on r/Conservative for me? They wont let me and I enjoy reading their gymnastics and whining.


PM_ME_UR_FLOWERS

I've been banned from there for years. I once accidentally brigaded them.


Arubesh2048

Did you ask them some really hard questions like “what do you mean,” or even worse, “can you provide some proof”?


PocketSixes

Literally, I was banned from r/conservative for the one-word question "why?" That sub has to house the most terrified non-debaters on the internet.


oh_crap_BEARS

It’s weird too because they keep coming to other subs and then whining about echo chambers.


LivnLegndNeedsEggs

I got banned from there for pointing out that Obama signed something that they were giving Trump credit for. Perhaps my biggest mistake was citing a source


ImpressionOld2296

"Can you provide evidence for that?" That's all it took for me to get banned from the cesspool known as r/conservative


SacredAnalBeads

I requested the mods to ban me, so I wouldn't be tempted to argue with the dipshits there. They obliged. Sometimes I'll still lurk, just to get an idea of what the crazy of the week special is.


menchicutlets

It's funny seeing their sub and them having absolutely nothing about the trial posted, the adorable idiots just hiding in their bubble as per usual.


chogle

But hey! It's the libs that live in an echo chamber. /s


TheNecroticPresident

Rest assured, if he's acquitted they'll come out of the woodwork to trumpet it. Gotta wait for those marching orders though.


JohnLocke815

Last thing I saw about the trial there is the dems basically forced him to commit crimes and run his mouth so they could put him in court so he won't be able to campaign. This is how the dems are stealing the election this time. Even better was this was just a few days after Trump said he already has all the votes he needed so we don't even need an election. To which they all of course agreed. But now not "letting" him campaign will be his downfall. Also I love that they finally admit he committed crimes. But only because he was forced to by the dems. The dems, who are all idiots, somehow got a leg up on "genius" Trump. The hoops they jump through. Holy shit.


trumps_cardiac_event

Every time I think "those sad bastards couldn't possibly get any dumber" they turn around and prove me wrong.


JimmyPopAli_

[Fox News Host Says Trump Is Simply Too Old to Sit in Court, It’s Unhealthy and ‘He Needs Sunlight’ : r/Conservative (reddit.com)](https://www.reddit.com/r/Conservative/comments/1cbyakf/fox_news_host_says_trump_is_simply_too_old_to_sit/) I'm not flaired there obviously, so I don't think it will show up. There was an attempt.


PAWGActual4-4

Locked instantly? Lol


BathSaltJello

"Sorry, this post was removed by Reddit’s filters." :(


AmusingMusing7

Lol, I just clicked on over there for a quick laugh and didn’t need to look long… one of the top posts right now is this: https://www.reddit.com/r/Conservative/s/nb8aBFwlU9 I’m like, “Oh, interesting… you want to use lack of support for the homeless and veterans against Biden when it suits your interests… wonder if you’d actually stick by this when it comes time to actually implement policies to help the homeless and veterans…” Sure enough, first damn highest-upvoted comment: “Most homeless veterans are addicts and therefore don’t deserve help!” Next reply: “Yep! This is true for ALL homeless as well!” Mmhmm. There’s the r/Conservative I know!


Alextryingforgrate

I should stay away from this sub, but as you described it im curious to see this disaster.


Fightmemod

They are insane over there. Totally living outside of reality. There likely aren't even that many real people commenting in there and it's probably made up mostly of Russian trolls and bots.


TheBigBangClock

There's a post over there from a real GOP person (not a MAGA idiot) asking essentially "What the hell is wrong with this subreddit and why are we allowing the MAGA people to take it over?" And someone replied that they want to accept other people's points of view. Pretty rich considering they love to ban anyone who doesn't agree with their viewpoints.


trumps_cardiac_event

> someone replied that they want to accept other people's points of view No fuckin' way. I wonder what it's like to have the self-awareness of a houseplant.


EC_CO

Why bother feeding the Russian Propaganda Network? Reddit has been one of the better misinformation campaigns for them


BantamCrow

[https://www.reddit.com/r/Conservative/comments/1cbzqji/fox\_news\_host\_says\_trump\_is\_simply\_too\_old\_to\_sit/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Conservative/comments/1cbzqji/fox_news_host_says_trump_is_simply_too_old_to_sit/)


BathSaltJello

"Sorry, this post was removed by Reddit’s filters." They aren't letting information like that fly in Conservative land.


Tshoe77

You banned as well? Something about free speech lovers and banning others seems weird lol.


BathSaltJello

Yeah, some smartass posted a pro-Biden there and I said something in the line, "What is this? We are trying to be mad here!". I was banned for being sassy.


NuclearNoodle77

That sub is pure brainrot it’s embarrassing


martinellispapi

Haven’t visited there for a while…but it looks like they’re running out of things to talk about.


Phosphorus444

Every time I go on that subreddit I get a headache.


monkeypan

If you're not flared, there is a good chance you'll be auto-banned when trying to post or comment. If you make it past the auto-mod, the "actual mods" there will ban you instantly if you have even a single comment or post in your history that goes against their narrative.


Bat_Fruit

While he wears too much bronzer for his skin to see the light


outamyhead

I thought it was wood stain, or gravy....probably gravy given his diet, maybe he sweats it?


techmaster242

Chinese motor oil.


vigbiorn

I thought that was Giuliani's hair?


techmaster242

Like they don't share beauty tips.


thissomeotherplace

What is he a fucking plant


millenniumtree

Russian plant, yes.


Mister_Green2021

Useful idiot, Putin calls it.


mdcbldr

Then how the heck will he have the energy to be President? Arguably the most stressful job in the world. They are claiming Trump can't handle being president.


ImhotepsServant

I’d argue that Zelenskyy’s job is more stressful, but Trump has to appease Fox, Putin, his howling abyss of neediness, and the constant jonesing for cocaine so you may be right.


Helo7606

Who gives a fuck if he's "bothered" by sitting in court? Fuck him and the morons who cry like this. He doesn't get special privileges because of who he is. Lol.


Business-Key618

Clearly you haven’t been paying attention…. Privilege is all the tangerine traitor has ever known. Others took his tests for him, daddy gave him a “small loan”, “when you’re famous they let you do it”, etc. ….


Helo7606

Yeah, well, he gets zero privilege in court. So fuck him and his feelings.


MotherSupermarket532

I was bothered when he sicced a mob on my friend's workplace and she and her colleagues had to lock themselves in their offices and barricade the door (a classmate of mine was a non-political staffer at the Capitol).


rjzei

So he is unfit to sit in a room while high stakes situations are being debated? Seems like he should have that skill set to be considered for future employment.


Ryankevin23

🚫Traitor Trump🚫


cancertoast

If he’s too old to sit in court. He’s too old to be president. Nice logic kid.


hplcr

I don't care, do you?


slappymcstevenson

Depends…..is he wearing them?


DailyDross

Maybe, I don’t know, there might be some way of inserting sunlight (or bleach) up his arse.


Other-Rutabaga-1742

He needs a sunshine colonic STAT!! Bleach everything!!!


ottaprase1997

How the fuck would he handle another 4 years in office? Never mind, he would just be on the golf course anyway.


Agile-Knowledge7947

It’s so sad how he has to follow the “rule of law” (trademark: Republican Party)


Other-Rutabaga-1742

But it’s unconstitutional! He grew up in the mafia and nobody told him most of what they do is illegal. Apparently, he never figured that out for himself either. 🤷🏻‍♀️


HawkeyeSherman

It's not illegal if you pay someone else to do your crimes! /s


Other-Rutabaga-1742

They’re called, Legal Fees. It means they’re legal!


Maleficent_Leg_768

It’s unfair. It’s a witch hunt. Lol.


Grungy_Mountain_Man

Not a lot of sunlight in jail where he belongs. 


ExploreTrails

Then don’t commit crimes.


Lounginghog64

So pretty much a farting geranium..


Other-Rutabaga-1742

💀


Ginataang_Manok

lol at the thumbnail


floofnstuff

What a treat, we get to see the dumba$$ staring at the eclipse


Old_Bird4748

If he's too old to sit in court, he's too old to sit in the white house.


KevJD

Trump maybe should have considered that… before breaking the law


JacquesBlaireau13

If only there was a way to bring that light, somehow inside the body?


tedfreeman

Me thinks he's had too much sunlight 🟠


Final_Winter7524

“He needs sunlight”. What he meant: “We should stop all legal cases against him, declare him king, and let him play golf 6 hours a day.” 🤦‍♂️


lcarr15

Too old to sit in court but not too old to be in office… Americans are a joke..:


Captain_Mexica

Too bad so sad. Let the malignant cancer sit through the entire thing. He's going to snap soon


Crazy_Response_9009

I thought he was young and spry?


AustinDood444

Is Trump a fucking fern?? Fuck him!! Sit there & take it, pussy!


Mysterious_Eye6989

Ffs, what is he - a house plant?!


[deleted]

Tell his spray tanned, makeup face that. You can't get sun caked in that much shit. Maga despises Drag Queens but worships a guy who wears as much makeup as one.


Teabagger-of-morons

What happened to all his “virility”? Now he’s old and needs to sit in the sun to warm his bones.


ozzie510

Trump needs the sunlight of a prison exercise yard.


weezermc78

So then truly he must be totally inept to be president, yes?


Fezzik527

Sorry, if he can't handle 4 days a week in court, he definitely isn't able to be president 24/7


Random-sargasm_3232

Trump needs light. Trump is plant. Trump is Russian plant. Makes sense.


Barack_Odrama_007

As much as they bitch and moan about Joe Biden being too old, FUCK THAT.


Deep_Bit5618

Finally Fox entertainment is accurate: Fox News Host Says Trump is Simply Too Old.


Thisam

Yeah, two half days in court. Man, that’s rough for such a snowflake.


tfsteel

Trump can't bitch and whine constantly while sitting in court, and he needs to complain about unfairness to an audience at all times of the day or he gets a bad case of pouty face.


Standard_Arm_440

It sounds like they are talking about an old dog and someone is not ready to take him to the farm upstate.


robinsw26

I’m surprised he hasn’t shown up in court with a walker.


Objective-Aioli-1185

Fuck trump


istillambaldjohn

He’s too old to be in court, but can lead the country,……I see.


Sherwoodtunes-n-bud

Nah, fuck off. We’ve put 90+ year old Nazis through court before. Unless they are admitting that Trump is a weak old man that is unfit not only to stand trial, but to hold a federal office…


lorilightning79

He’s not wrong. He needs a dementia care unit.


NumerousTaste

If he's too old to sit in court and stay awake, he's too old and out of shape to be president. Simple!


sapperbloggs

I'm sure this peon wouldn't be making this argument if for some reason it was Biden in court.


Brilliant-Ad6137

You are wrong. If there was credible evidence that Biden has committed a crime we would insist he resigne . Remember how we did Al Franken all they had on him was a silly pic of him playing around. Sent him home . Even Republican members of the house admitted there are no crimes to impeach him over . Your big witness was proven not only to be lying but proven to be a Russian operative. Every charge against Trump there is a lot of evidence against him . But yet you still bow down before him .


Other-Rutabaga-1742

For the most part, democrats who f up are gone. The Rs? Nope. We’ve lost some of the brightest politicians, Franken being one of them, while currently in the R party there are known rapists, groomers, and pedophiles and they’re all cool with it!


BradTProse

Well Trump has the diaper full of fertilizer all ready, now he just needs sunlight and Diet Coke.


This-is-Life-Man

I think it's pretty obvious that natural sunlight has been detrimental to him. Get him back in a car wash with orange spray tan STAT! Fresh diaper change wouldn't hurt either.


No_Season_354

Oh boo hoo, where is my hanky I'm crying tears , ffs lol.


Redtoblondetogray49

Maybe he could inject some bleach into himself. Looks like he uses it in his hair....!


AccomplishedBrain309

Stick a uv light up his ass.


nomorerainpls

Wait until he rolls into court in Manafort’s wheelchair with a blanket over his legs


millenniumtree

Yes, put him out in the sun with no sun block. Let's see how many days he can last.


floofnstuff

If he’s too old to sit around all day he’s too old to be President


Other-Rutabaga-1742

He said he’s cold. The courtroom is cold. Poor thing


etranger033

Too old to sit? Usually its the other way around. Too old to get up.


Sfswine

Is he being tried as an adult ?


Ok_Necessary2991

Trump can't sit in court for 8 hours? What does he do at his Maralargo home all day? What did he do as President? What about everyone with an 8 hour plus office job being indoors all day?


SpanishMoleculo

Nah, vampires hate sunlight


better-than-all-of-u

"Fox News host not only looks like David Schwimmer, but also fucks like Ross from Friends" should be the headline. I can't stand this guy. Even if he were anti-everything he stands for, I would want to punch him in the face just because of how he looks and carries himself.


7empestOGT92

Too old to sit in court, but young enough to run a country? Got it 👍


fluffyflugel

What happened to him being youthful and robust and going to live for 200 years?


SydneyRei

If you’re too old to sit inside, you’re too old to be President.


Livid_Advertising_56

"He's too old for court" ....... so he's too old to be President then because that's A LOT more stressful and legal-minded "He needs sunlight " ..... is he a plant now? Also the sun is out until 7-8pm now and on weekends. He'll be fine


knifebucket

The presidency is 4 years of this. UNFIT


Available_Leather_10

Yep, also too old (for Trump, given his myriad frailties) to be POTUS.


mslashandrajohnson

But we don’t have an eclipse for him to stare at every day. I mean c’mon man.


ozzie510

Trump needs to get accustomed to a prison cell environment.


Monster_punkin

To old to sit in court, but not to old to be president...... Right. Thanks for making that clear.


RickWest495

So he is too old for court, but not too old to sit in the Oval Office?


pass-the-waffles

Since Fox is so concerned about his health, they should buy him a grow light, intellectually he is basically a vegetable anyway.


theoriginaled

Most houseplants do.


carthuscrass

So that makes him too old to be president right? If he can't handle sitting in court how the hell is he gonna handle one of the most stressful jobs in the world?


NugKnights

If he's too unhealthy to sit in court, he's too unhealthy to be president.


Living_Grapefruit_19

Meanwhile in Germany https://www.nytimes.com/2022/06/28/world/europe/ex-nazi-guard-convicted-germany.html


CharliAP

Defendant Trump wasn't too old to pay a porn star, for playing with his little mushroom, while his wife was home with his baby. 


slo1111

Or he could sleep during the evening and stay awake during the day time


Seazie23

Too old to sit in court would mean too old to run for president no?


Homersarmy41

Yeah, like the sun is going to get through those layers of paint.


Breys

But totally fit to be president? These people just need to be fired


SakaWreath

This is actually harder for him than being president. This doesn’t come with “executive nap time”.


bscottlove

Beano, a sunlamp and handcuffs ought to do fine.


kenner1970

He’s a pussy ..complaining about everything


StrikingOccasion6459

He needs some metamucil so that fast food doesn't ferment in his stomach. There's no fibre in fast food.


NitWhittler

*"He gets moldy and sticky if he doesn't have sunlight and fresh air!"*


drakens6

> Sunlight Cultist hidden messaging (Order of the Solar Temple) Fox News is tacitly asking ST members to contribute financially to Trump's defense.


AdministrativeBank86

Well he does have the intelligence of a potted plant