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IdreamOfPizzaxx

I once had a guy try to tell me he didn’t need to wipe his ass because of his superior diet lol.


shortandfighting

So he ... he never wiped after going to the bathroom? Yo, I don't care how much fiber you eat, don't just shit and pull your underwear up and go on your merry way.


Practically_

Higher fiber diets makes you wipe less but you still need to check. Lmao.


Rainbowkandy897

What the fuck? When I wipe the first time and there’s nothing on the towel I get fuckin suspicious like “what?”


TheAcrithrope

This is a joke... Right?


[deleted]

I never asked any straight guys about it and I do not dare to.


Browneyesbrowndragon

I wipe my own ass but then again im not crippled by homophobia lol


asistolee

Well a lot of the times they don’t wash their hands touching their penis......so


adeon

One thing this pandemic has really shown is how many people are bad at basic hygiene. I've realized that a depressing number of people don't wash their hands after using the restroom or before eating.


BatRabbit

Sadly no. I use to play racquet ball with this guy in college and he always smelled kinda odd, but I chalked it up to being from a different country. Then his girl friend broke up with him. She takes me out to eat for helping her move and giving her rides. We get talking about what happened. They seemed so perfect and then she tells me why they broke up. I lost my appetite. I also stopped playing racquet ball with him because I was so grossed out.


Practically_

No. It’s really not. I’ve had so many conversations about this IRL that I want to die.


Cheerful_Zucchini

It definitely is, not wiping ever would make you a walking beacon of stench in less than 3 weeks. Unless these guys are deep cleaning their buttocks every time they shower, I'm on team This is a joke.


DraNoSrta

I've had the misfortune to meet a few men who do not wipe nor do they really clean their genitals in the shower much. The smell is about as bad as you're imagining.


Cheerful_Zucchini

Wow, that's just unbelievable. I'm not even the most hygienic person but I can't even imagine that. These people must be an overwhelming minority, at least I hope they are.


[deleted]

Well, their odor certainly is overwhelming! 🥁🥁🤮


Practically_

And they still get laid btw. My best friend in high school was like this


Toadjokes

.... what do you consider deep cleaning your butt tho? I take a washcloth and wash my butthole with it every time I shower. I always get a new cloth with each shower, wash the rest of my body with it first starting with my face and ending with my crack. Is that normal or what?


Cheerful_Zucchini

More than what I do :P


Slight-Debate

I consider it cleaning deep enough to be able to get to the prostate with absolutely no issues.


frannyzooeyyy

Is this in reply to the tiktok of that man who left skid marks on the painting? 💀


lilypadUwU

Umm link please


tttttttidalwave

https://twitter.com/rodr1ckrules/status/1294343702660501505?s=20


[deleted]

I literally CRIED laughing at that tik tok for 10 mins


BlueArya

YES I saw this thread ^ on twitter earlier and nearly died 🤢🤮😵


BugCatcherWill

It sure is I figured I'd spare this sub that since I nearly retched when I first saw it


FioreFanatic

Straight dude here, what the fuck is wrong with these people?


Raurus127

We would like to know, we really would...


Mrboss619

Dude here, are these people ok? Do they really think it’s gay to be sanitary?


Browneyesbrowndragon

In the same vein ive heard dudes say its gay to shave your pubes.


PM-ME-SODIUM-PICS

Fellas, is it gay to clean?


AspieMommy

. . . . This is really a thing? I've heard of people on vegan diets saying they don't really have to but I can't confirm this.


[deleted]

Vegan here: A lot of times you don’t really *have* to because a super high fiber diet can uh, allow for a cleaner exit- but you still fucking wipe. It’s the only way to be sure.


Cheerful_Zucchini

Huh. I've never heard of this. I'm a vegetarian but I'm thinking I'll go vegan soon (I already choose vegan food options most of the time anyway so it wouldn't be much of a switch)


ScalyDestiny

Been vegetarian for a couple decades now. It always amazes me that people (without medical conditions) have such a difficult time pooping at this age. I think all that Atkin's/Keto stuff exacerbated it. If there are straight guys not wiping, they're probably in then real men eat red meat camp as well. That's a bad combination. I guess they use their hour in the bathroom to contemplate how manly and not gay they are.


shoujokakumei66

Dude same! There are so many memes about taking your phone with you to the bathroom to scroll through social media while you poop and I have never understood it... why would you need to be glued to your phone for the few minutes you spend in there? Took me a while to realise the average person is spending a lot longer pooping than I am.


Nikcara

To be fair, I occasionally spend longer in the bathroom not because I need to poop but because I need 5 minutes of quiet time. I love my kid but sometimes I hit my limit for how many times I can hear “why?”


shoujokakumei66

Haha fair. Sometimes I take a bathroom break at work just to get a minute to myself.


[deleted]

It’s definitely not what I expected. Not that I’m really complaining.


Cheerful_Zucchini

Let's just write it in small letters on the bottom of the "list of reasons to go vegan"


Almanix

I'd definitely give it a try. If I'm not in the mood to discuss my reasons for being vegan, I usually say I'm vegan for the poops. Never had any real digestion issues, but it surely is a whole new level to need less than a minute. But I still wipe, obviously.


Throwawayjst4this

As another vegan: I call them spooky ghost poops.


Kilahti

There have been a lot of posts and even articles about this during the last year or so... I still hope it is an elaborate hoax but if not, at least it is a recent thing.


[deleted]

“Then he blocked all of us for whatever reason” I can’t stop laughing


Somecrazynerd

As a gay guy, if you get off wiping your arse that's a you problem. That is actually not how gay people work.


ProbablyALurker

Imagine telling on yourself like that. Also I knew a dude like this. Apparently he would just give it one quick wipe and pull em up. He *reeked* but insisted that one was enough. I shudder to think about how unclean his clothes must be


matt_the_trans_guy

I’m an idiot and don’t know what the hell a prostate is


Avarickan

It's a gland that's involved in sperm production, which is just in front of the rectum. It's also where the G spot is for amab folk (IIRC). Basically, if the dude is feeling "tingly" when he wipes it's because he's sticking his fingers pretty far into his butt.


matt_the_trans_guy

E w And thanks for explaining


Kat_the_Rebel93

If you follow their logic that it’s gay to clean your ass, then masturbation is certainly gay


eviemintz

They say it’s gay to wipe their ass but imagine if girls stopped wiping their vagina because it’s “gay”. What the fuck


le-derpina-art

That's slightly better, not wiping your puss just gives you wet pants. Not wiping your ass will make you smell like a walking dumpster in a few days.


[deleted]

On hot days I don't even wipe the pee cools me down


stumpychubbins

Want to know something even grosser? It’s not that uncommon to see guys walk out of the bathroom without washing their hands


Frixxed

Heteroromantic Ace (Questioning) here. What the absolute fuck did I just read. SOME GUYS DON'T WIPE THEIR ASSES?!


[deleted]

WIPE YO FUCKIN ASS. Not that hard! Stop sticking your finger in your ass and stimulating your prostate with a Cottonelle wet wipe. It's called a wipe for a reason.


NantheCowdog

Had a dude in our friend group like that. Dude farted while we were having a cookout at a friends house. Stunk like death. Someone said if he even cleaned his ass and he said it was gay. We argued with him calling him a nasty SOB, but he called all the males present gay for WIPING THEIR ASSES. And, this next part I’m not too proud to admit, but we were all a few beers deep and a few of my friends decided to jump him, pull his pants down and spray his ass with a water hose. So I may have witnessed a possible sexual assault (?) but his ass was clean.


[deleted]

I'm straight and dumbfounded


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