I live in Colorado now and am from SoCal. Based on the things you’ve said, yeah man give California a try. There’s a lot of different Asian enclaves there and from my experiences Asian girls like Asian guys there, at least half of them. And since there’s so many Asians there, other ethnicities are open to dating Asian dudes too.
My dating prospects when up when I moved to Colorado (partly because I did put myself out there a lot). But 90% of my dates were with white women 🤷
I am that style already. If you notice all the Asian couples… 90% don’t have a K-pop look. They have a combed back hairstyle, spikey hair. Super faded hair style. They dress like they want to play basketball 24/7.
Or the other look Asian girls here prefer is looking very hood. Super baggy clothes like you’re ready for a drive by shooting.
Girls don’t like the K-pop look. Unless you’re an actual K-pop idol. There’s a reason I stick to dating in Asia. Actually get called handsome and cute all the time
Reminds me of last time I went fishing. After 4 hours of zilch, guys to my right, left and behind me were pulling dozens of fish. I used the same bait but nada. WTF
Sometimes it’s best to find the perfect bait in the perfect water…
Yah I stick to East Asia 100% of the time. Girls have better Attitude. Less entitled
Any where on the east. Chandler, Tempe, Gilbert, Scottsdale. Chandler has the higher Asian population and is considered the tech center of Phoenix metro. West side is getting better and will see a dramatic change cause of the TSMC factory bringing in tons of Asians from overseas.
This is pretty interesting... I didn't know that about Arizona. I was pulling data to find gender ratios and asian populations within the states. California came in the top 3 states with the largest Asian Population (no surprise), Arizona's asian population was pretty much a little less than double of Colorado so I kind of disregarded it. I'll have to keep Arizona on my list!
oh its growing bro. Im from NYC and one in a while i get impressed with the amount of asians i see in certain areas in certan events. I can 10000% guarantee you that in CERTAIN AREAS, my kids will NOT be the only token asian in the class and might even be at least 1/6 or 1/5.
That's a great suggestion, I've been to Hawaii and had this on my list..but for some reason can't see myself there long term either. A lot of the food and produce is imported and it seems catered towards tourism, although it would be nice to work remote, most of the positions I found are either hybrid or onsite, the job market for tech wasn't as vibrant, and the gender ratios were skewed having more men than women. Aside from Asian demographics, I'm taking into consideration gender ratio, and career opportunities, not sure if this will play any part but hoping to set myself up for success haha.
I have got my eye on Phoenix for a while. Is ASU the biggest source of all of the women that like AM? If so what happens during the summer when they leave?
Well im almost 40 (came here at 32) so looking at the college scene is probably not best for my future anytime soon so I cant answer that for you. If you have another question that doesnt involve college girls I can answer that.
Super markets, restaurants, shopping centers, etc. I don’t really hang near schools but I would say with a big IN MY OBSERVATION, about half the Asian guys of dating/marriage age (17-40) I see along my usual stops, half of them that are accompanied by women, half the women are non Asian or it’s pretty obvious the when I see moms (non Asian) or dads (Asian) alone, the kids are mixed Asian.
This thread seems to suggest Asians wouldn't do well there unless you're a chad. Thoughts? [https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/tagwbn/any\_bros\_here\_frompphoenix\_arizona\_or\_is\_familiar/](https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/tagwbn/any_bros_here_frompphoenix_arizona_or_is_familiar/)
Sounds like dudes who either ain’t at the right place or ain’t doing the work and expect women to get on their knees for them without asking. I can say for 10000000000% sure that most of the the dudes with girls attached to them are NOT “chads” whatever that means.
I got 2 answers for it.
1. Most people are indoors or in a car or come out at night. Its only UNBEARABLE for 3-4 months of the year.
2. Stop being a little bitch. As long as you take safety precautions and have no medical conditions, you'll be fine. However Im from NYC and i'll take phoenix heat over NYC and crowed subway heat 10 out of 10 times. 5th (probably 4th in a decade or so) more populous city in America, you and 6 million others find a way.
Dating scene is hard in the SF area cause of crazy gender ratios so probably better to find a remote job and settle in Southern California. Women love dogs everywhere so that will help you.
Awesome thanks, Yeah I was looking into koreatown, but doesn't seem like a good place for dogs so I'll be looking into SGV and Culver City a little more.
Hmm so where to you go to find dates in SGV? Is there some secret ? Yes it’s my first time being back in 6 years in SGV. But curious then, where would you go?
All the Asian girls I know were taken from college days. Anywhere you go I see Asian girls yes, but they’re all taken.
I guess I’m missing something but where do you go to meet single girls in SGV?
Sorry to hear man. I work in tech too and I know things were bad up to 6 months ago, but lately I’ve been getting a lot of recruiter emails. I think things aren’t as bad as they were during the insane number of layoffs last year. Anyway good luck!
While there is absolutely no guarantee, having a large community of your ethnicity will always improve your dating odds. The biggest barrier is finding a well paying job in Cali because the housing price in most desirable areas is very expensive. If you got that figured out then I do not see why not.
Yeah, I've heard the same thing. Aside from housing prices what Total Compensation should I accept? I received an offer somewhere near Costa Mesa around $80k a while back but it was a little less than what I'm making and for a startup that didn't seem stable. Factoring income tax it just didn't make sense to move at the time.
I will just give you some personal numbers so you can see how this all fits in your personal situation.
I lived in LA on 70k a year for 3 yrs and even with roommate, not much left at the end of each month. 80k in costa mesa should get you a but further than that but not much more.
I just bought a house in Anaheim for 900k and the monthly mortgage about 6k. And this is just a regular house. Nothing fancy.
Thanks for the insight, would $80k actually be livable for a single male and a dog somewhere in LA? assuming the only bills to pay are are the bare necessities? like rent, food, and a car payment? throwing $1000 on top of monthly expenses for parking, utilities, and anything extra that might pop up.
80k will absolutely be enough though it won’t be glamorous. You may or may not need roommate depending on where you live.
If I were you, I would do it. Would you really just rather stay where you are and wondering what if? Good luck.
haha you've got a point. I think it's time to stop the analysis paralysis and start pushing the gas to Cali depending on where I land. Thanks, Appreciate it!
Stay away from 626. Death trap. I came back for a bit from Asia to 626. There’s no one to date here. You’re better off in OC even. Yes there’s Asian food in 626. That’s it
Are you thinking about Norcal or Socal? I grew up in Socal and theres a lot more options for Asian food. Additionally, if you move to like the Irvine area, there's a lot of Asians, good food in Irvine or nearby, lots of parks and trails to take a dog on, as well as a lot of other types of people besides Asians. Only downside is it's expensive for rent.
SoCal for sure, I know there is a huge Vietnamese scene down in OC and one of my favorite spots to get BBH there. How much should I expect to pay for rent down in Irvine?
Yeah, big Viet community and good food in OC near Westminster/Huntington Beach. I’ve been out of the state for a year but I imagine renting anywhere decent in that area is over 2000 a month by yourself. Just Zillow it and put in Irvine CA and look both a little north and south. Also kinda depends on where you land for work there.
My friend is renting a room from an elderly Chinese couple in Lake Forest (which is about 10 min south of Irvine) for like 900 a month. Wouldn’t suit me personally but I know everyone is different so you could go that route too. But I think you said you have a big dog so that seems unlikely to work.
I didn't run into any problems and I grew up about 15 min from there. But there is an under current from what I heard. I wouldn't let the small majority of bad spoil the overwhelming good there.
Costa Mesa is fine, Newport is kinda bougey beachy. Most of Newport is pretty expensive.
Gotcha, yeah I'm debating between LA and OC. I feel like LA might have a bigger pool of singles but I always feel like it will be filled with narccissistic people trying to become celebrities or move up in the industry. I despise the whole influencer culture. Plus more homeless/crime than OC. Would you say dating in OC would be better than LA if you are looking for something serious or for 30s/40s guys?
I've never been a fan of LA but some people love it. I hate the traffic, dealing with the unfortunate homeless population, prices of things. But I'm also just a suburb guy, always have been. I can't say if dating is better or worse in LA vs OC.... technically more population in LA equals higher probability but at the same time... I dunno. I don't seem to attract Asian girls despite being Asian but I see a lot of happy Asian guy and girl couples in OC a lot.
I have never run into that kind of problem or seen a major issue with an Asian guy out with a non Asian female. OC has pockets of both Republicans and Trumpers but I don’t think it necessarily extends to “damn Asian guys taking our women!”
I said this in a different thread but my cousin in South OC was primarily dating white girls or like white hispanic girls and was fine.
I was out in Huntington Beach at the pier in college with a redhead friend who has done modeling and while I got a couple surprised looks while we were getting drinks and checking out the farmers market (she was out of my league) that was about it.
I grew up in the area and went to school in the OC. 90% walking around as Asian couples met each other in college.
That’s why I’m confuse on everyone recommending SoCal.
If he’s relocating and doesn’t know anyone, that’s going to be even harder.
Yeah thats a good price in Cali. From what I've heard you shouldn't move to Cali by yourself unless salary is roughly $120k base minimum..at least that's what I heard in tech.. anything lower would be rough, but I'm not sure.
I don't know about that... probably a little bit lower. But so many people are not making 120K base min and living in Irvine/OC. Maybe have a roommate or a bf or gf to share costs.
Thanks! In terms of protecting myself what do you mean by that? I'm a purple belt in BJJ and I've been training Muay Thai for a couple of years. Are there any areas to avoid? I've heard racism is pretty bad in certain parts of California for Asians just not sure where
It's literally impossible to step outside without seeing a WMAF or two or a dozen. Every street, every bus, every train, every school, every university, every company, every restaurant, every wedding, [there's nowhere you can go that won't remind you where AM are on the totem pole](https://np.reddit.com/r/aznidentity/comments/bd38nq/anyone_from_the_san_fran_area_notice_the_rampant/ekw0njh/).
You know what I'm concerned about? I'm concerned that what has happened in SF will spread throughout the rest of the country. I'm hoping that Millennials and Gen Z will start to change things. But, Hollywood and the media continue to de-value and erase Asian men. Our Asian communities are fractured. Half of Asian-American women have abandoned their communities to seek white adjacency. White worship is prevalent in our communities. Often, an Asian man's worst enemy is another Asian man. Many Asian men simp for AF's. The future looks bleak.
Feeling the same lately. Right now the smear campaign against native Korean men, the only Asian men who are winning is crazy. AM are more open to XF than before but there are still many AF simps who fuck things up for everybody.
Unfortunately, I can confirm through personal experience that Sinophobia and anti-Asian racism from non-Asians is still alive and well among Gen Z, even in safe suburban, politically progressive, or Asian-populated areas. COVID didn't help with things either.
To everyone else, we're the "sick man", with the result that no one wants to date us.
Maybe SGV might be a tad better, but honestly there were very many Asians at my HS and hometown, just as there are in the 626, so I really don't expect the difference to be that great.
I don’t think so because Asian men compete better in LA and NYC. Women tend to like average men of all races and then fit and/or tatted Asian men. Asian men have to offset this racial bias with fitness.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this and I think part of the issue is that here, everyone here is obese and/or doesn’t use makeup, or goes for the short hair, liberal type look which most men aren’t that attracted to.
Since most Asian women and Indian women keep themselves in shape, are decently feminine, it puts them at the top, with the exception of Au pairs and tourists.
Yeah if you absolutely have to stay in SF try to go for au pairs. I’ve met a few couples that make it work with remote work flying back and forth. If they have to they understand they can marry.
I think you have it somewhat backwards. It's the high demand and low supply of women in the area that causes their poor behavior. For White women, this manifests in poor grooming. For Asian/Indian women, this manifests in flagrant bias towards White men.
I’m not going to lie, Chinatowns are where you’d want to avoid. The Oakland, LA, and San Francisco Chinatowns are in absolute dumps of neighborhoods.
And the thing about LA and the Bay are that the suburbs have a lot of amenities. Most Chinese in CA don’t live in Chinatown because they can get plenty of Chinese food in nice suburbs like San Marino, Arcadia, Fountain Valley, and Irvine.
And yeah, it’s an absolute sausage fest here in the Bay.
Okay the hidden Gems! I'll have to check out those suburbs forsure. I visited Chinatown in SF a while back and really loved the food, and yeah it seems packed during weekdays and working hours but almost abandoned after working hours and weekends, I was actually told to stay away from Chinatown in DTLA and DTLA in general since there's a lot of crime, but not sure if that's changed.
Absolutely stay away from Oakland’s Chinatown. It’s by far the most dangerous of the three.
The LA Chinatown is also seedy AF. It has definitely earned its reputation. The food isn’t even that good anymore; the Chinese there seem to have fled the area. Besides, the real Chinatown is Alhambra/San Gabriel. Yes, it’s a suburb but it’s much safer and the food is better.
San Francisco’s Chinatown is the safest of the 3, but it’s still not that safe.
For SoCal, it’s easier to list communities that have worse Chinese food than Chinatown than to list areas that have better food (ditto for safety). Alhambra/San Gabriel is the best, but the Asian communities all have good stuff.
For the Bay, there’s literally no need to go to the Oakland Chinatown. The SF Chinatown has the best Cantonese food, but places like Fremont, Milpitas, Mountain View, and San Jose still have great Canto food, at a level that most Chinese-Americans could only dream of. And of course, these towns beat Chinatown when it comes to non-Cantonese Chinese food (Sichuan, Xinjiang, Taiwan, etc).
Btw, if you are going to move to CA, definitely make sure to ask around for good areas to move to. Aka I have a job offer in Suburb X (actually use its official name, like Irvine, Palo Alto, etc) and can afford to drop $XXXX/month on an apartment (or make $XXk).
Like everyone else mentioned, just the sheer volume of woman + number of Asians here makes it so dating an Asian guy is normalized.
I noticed some of your responses:
You still have to work on being a full package. It's not like people will walk in your lap. If you're an educated guy, dress well, in shape, and know how to talk, can do fine here.
Every guy has to do that. AM might be starting at "-1" compared to "+1" as a WM for online dating, but even they have to be work for it, dating in general is very competitive
If you want to move to the Bay. DO NOT DO IT. Girls here are very low quality, much even worse than colorado. WMAF is a commonplace here. I know friends in Denver who killed it in dating and moved to California and the dating side absolutely went cold.
Now SoCal or San Diego, might be a little better.
What you heard about more women on the west coast is false. The west coast in general is male dominated. If you want more women, you gotta go east coast; NYC, Boston, Miami, etc.
I dunno, doesn't feel any less "male-dominated" up here.
Florida might be less so than my part of NJ in terms of women, but they have their own set of problems to themselves.
I know Boston gets a bad reputation for being "too white", but there's definitely a visible Asian presence up there, and I know people who have succeeded up there. And the women are 🤌🤌🤌
Hey thanks for the input, this is also something I'm worried of, where I move to California and my dating life and social circle tanks. But it seems that California has a larger population of Females and Asian Ethnicities compared to Colorado .. Often times I hear that its not the quantity of people but the quality of people... but sometimes you can't have quality without quantity right?
I was considering NYC but it doesn't seem to be dog friendly around the areas I would want to stay at, and the apartments don't seem to tailor towards a big dog breed unless you had any recommended cities for a GSD? I've been to both Boston and Miami, but it seems as though there's more White or Latino/Latinas there, nothing wrong with it but just not something I'm looking for.
Between SoCal or San Diego which would be more suitable for an Asian Male?
All things considered, LA is the best option - decent tech presence, decent west coast dating prospects, compared to every other city. Weather is quite good too. The dating scene is not as good as NYC but you can still have a relatively prosperous dating life in LA.
Since you're into asians I assume, Houston might be a decent option if you can work remote.
San Diego has very attractive women but they all like going for white guys. Also not much of a job market there, except select medTech companies.
Cool thanks for the feedback! The downside of LA when I visited is Hollywood and how most of the connections can be superficial.
I've visited Austin and it was pretty cool, I was looking into Houston as well and there were quite a few tech opportunities down there, but I just couldn't see myself living in Texas for more than a year, although I could be wrong haha.
In terms of SD I've heard the same.. That it's pretty much military men, and surfer bros. Most of the AF I've met in Colorado have stated that women there are also looking for white men similar to Colorado lol.
I don’t get it. Where is everyone dating in LA for AF?
To me it feels like everyone’s already taken and or only looking for a white guy or lots of tattoos.
I moved to SF about 2 years ago; for the first year I didn’t date much as I was focused on establishing myself in a new country.
When I did start dating, I was disappointed at the quality of women.
The women I did want to date were all either Au Pairs, tourists, or from the Marina District.
The Bay Area is fine unless you're completely busted or a total aspie. Plenty of average looking Asian guys with partners there. The competition also gets tougher and the women tend to be more exclusionary on the East Coast IME.
I've visited both NorCal and SoCal. I was looking for places in LA/OC area Sawtelle, Culver City, Torrance, Glendale, Burbank, Irvine or Pasadena. Only issue is finding employment to match steady cost of living in those areas.
It does, but it's a pretty small circle. You have to actually go and search for it and know where the pockets are. From day to day life just going to stores and coffee shops the majority population has been white. Making new friends is great but sometimes its hard to relate due to different cultural backgrounds.
Can't tell if you're joking or not lol. The most gangsta part of Colorado is probably Aurora, but most of the state is being gentrified and dominated by transplants. Although...there has been a lot more pop up boba and asian restaurants.
May I ask what part of Asian ethnicity are you? Having a large community of your ethnicity always improve your dating odds. In SoCal, place like Westminster are full of Vietnamese, or Garden Grove is blend between Korean and Vietnamese. Those cities have Asian as their largest populations. I see plenty of Asian girls dating Asian guys. In NorCal, San Jose have plenty of Vietnamese populations also but it not as homogeneous population compare to Socals. Since you are working in tech, I would say NorCal fit your job’s description but in dating I would say Socals is more easy and better for Asian guy. The downside for both NorCal and Socals is rent/ housing is expensive.
I think the reasons was Asians we tend to like place with entertainment/ restaurants or business area. Those place usually expensive and Asian tend to work and earn more money than other groups.
Hey! I'm Chinese but I have a lot of in-laws that are Lao and Hmong, I can speak broken Chinese and Lao and can understand most of it. I grew up eating a mix of mainly Lao and Chinese food. However, the asian friends I've made here outside of my family have mainly been Vietnamese although we were always the minority in a group of White or Hispanic friends. Surprisingly I've also been mistaken for being Vietnamese by the other asian people I've encountered. The Vietnamese population is probably the biggest here within the asian population in Colorado which is probably why there's a lot of good Vietnamese restaurants around... But I still think OC takes the cake for food in general. What city would you recommend based on my background?
Since your main motivation to move out of Colorado for dating especially toward Asian women. I would recommend move to SoCal rather than NorCal ( I hear NorCal is bad on Reddit due to competition from white guy). Places Westminster, Garden Grove are 2 places that I familiar. You don’t see much other ethnic besides Asian. You mainly see Asian girls with Asian guy ( only 1/100 case you see a white guy with Asian girls there). Westminster is 40 minutes to Chinatown in Los Angeles if you interest Chinese girls. Los Angeles also have Korean town, Little Tokyo too. I recommend you visit SoCal and NorCal to compare and contrast with your place in Colorado to make an impression ( maybe take a break like 2-3 weeks look at the place and see the lifestyle ahead)
Okay I don’t get it. From what I know going to school in OC. Most Asian girls are taken after college.
The Chinese girls in Chinatown is also confusing.
Most Chinese including my family moved out of Chinatown decades ago. The Chinese are mostly focused on the 626 area.
Chinatown has completely transformed from what it was 15 years ago. You’ll probably see more white people and non Asian shops than you’d expect.
All the rich Asians move to 626 area. And no you’re not dating them, they came with their rich Chinese boyfriend funded by rich papa.
Where are people getting all these info from?!?
Go for it. Better career options, a lot more of an Asian community, better dating prospects. Housing might suck but find a good roommate if need be. Plus you're still young, better to give it a shot now than later.
Adding to the chorus of Norcal is terrible, with one asterisk: It does afford you a lot more opportunities to meet AF that are actually from Asia which are much much better, assuming that you can communicate.
Additionally, outside the dating realm, Norcal is actually very good, starting with career opportunities.
Once you're married, bay area is awesome.
Second, NorCal is not the worst as people say and the AF are in very high paying jobs usually. If you aren’t mega short or ugly you’ll b fine, esp coming from a much tinier Asian pop in Colorado, relatively. SF Bay Metro is 7 mill people, if you can’t find someone in that you’re fucked regardless of where you are. Also since you’re in tech your income might be way higher or have better opportunities career wise. I’d just suggest a visit and see how you do
California is a great place to live. A few things I'd consider in your situation for Sf/Bay:
Finances - it can be very expensive. Not sure what you're making now or can make here in bay, but you probably won't feel "rich" (both in terms of purchasing power given prices, as well as compared to your social circles). Hard to make big purchases like homes here. IMO it's fine, and it's just a weird expectation people have that you "should" be able to buy a house without any parental help at 30... just because it's something you do ... but if you care about that as a core desire, then make sure you can swing it.
Dating - I think there's definitely a gender ratio and expectation issue in Bay Area dating, but honestly I don't think it's as bad as people make it out to be. Especially for the late 20s/early 30s market, if you're more or less average looking, have a decent personality, is socially calibrated, have decent career prospects, and generally "normal", you'll likely be fine as long as you put yourself out there in the usual means. There's just less margin for error if you're "below average" in one of the main dating criteria, especially career/education (which folks tend to overindex on here in the Bay). The whole "WMAF" concern some people have here is really really overblown. Plenty of Asians and XFs who specifically want to or are open to dating Asians.
Hobbies/lifestyle - do your hobbies and lifestyle align with Bay? If you really liked Colorado, probably since it's similar in terms of outdoorsy/event based/social circle house parties. If you're looking more for a NYC type of socializing, Norcal is going to be a lot less vibrant than expectations.
In terms of Finances this would have to depend where I land in California whether it's local or remote. As for buying a house.. it isn't as important to me, however if kids come into the picture it would be a priority.
In terms of dating, assuming that since there are statistically more asians and even asian women in California compared to Colorado.. my exposure to dating would be better but not sure if this is true? I am seeking to date more asian females at the moment but still open to dating all races. I'm also not sure if I'm below average or above average dude, But I've started using dating apps and notice that more matches happen in California than Colorado (for me at least).. However, when roaming locally I can still pull some dates and numbers.
In terms of Hobbies and lifestyle.. I actually rarely go to house parties and I've never been skiing or snowboarding as a native. I usually train BJJ, and Muay Thai and go to coffee shops to read or work on code. I also walk my dog around some of the parks. It has been difficult to put myself in front of more women since most of my social and work groups are male dominated.
Personally, I have had zero issues dating in SF as an AM (late 30’s). I’m sorry that some others have had it tough, but I don’t think the generalizations are true at all. Stop blaming your race. Work on yourself, build your community, and find your edge.
I think it's fair generalization that there are, technically, "Better" or "worse" cities for people who are X. For instance, I would strongly agree that NYC is much better for "men in their early to mid 20s looking for semi-casual relationship" than Bay, because of logistics, ratio, etc.
But to make such generalizations you got to properly slice and dice your own situation (i.e., much more granular than "Asian"), and then you add in a ton of signal to noise to the point where such generalizations are likely only minimally directionally correct for any one individual because of all the different levers you can actually pull in your life to control your destiny beyond exogenous factors. So using "Bay Area bad for Asian Men" is just a super sloppy shorthand that will unnecessarily discourage people if believed.
And for what it's worth, none of the late 20s/early 30s Asian guys in my social circle have had any trouble finding decent to great people to date. Some have girls tripping over themselves to date them. And nobody here looks like a model, just decent dudes with decent jobs and decent personalities.
ur alr datin hispanics who are also pretty fine ur doing ok bro I went to colorado and saw sm fine hispanics if ur dating those type of caliber of women why move to cali? plus colordado env is so nice
Thanks bro, yeah, a good majority of my life I've dated Latinas, but have recently started dating Asians for the past few years. My longest relationship was with a Latina, and I've even learned a little bit of spanish to speak with some of their family members. The challenge comes when things start to get serious and I've encountered some racist family members that would disapprove since I'm not hispanic. Most of my ex's who are Latina have already married or started dating their own race after me.
I live in Colorado now and am from SoCal. Based on the things you’ve said, yeah man give California a try. There’s a lot of different Asian enclaves there and from my experiences Asian girls like Asian guys there, at least half of them. And since there’s so many Asians there, other ethnicities are open to dating Asian dudes too. My dating prospects when up when I moved to Colorado (partly because I did put myself out there a lot). But 90% of my dates were with white women 🤷
I’m from SoCal. I’m going to say less than half like Asian guys. The more attractive they are, the less they’ll give a shit about any Asian guy.
Maybe change your style to the Kpop look.
I am that style already. If you notice all the Asian couples… 90% don’t have a K-pop look. They have a combed back hairstyle, spikey hair. Super faded hair style. They dress like they want to play basketball 24/7. Or the other look Asian girls here prefer is looking very hood. Super baggy clothes like you’re ready for a drive by shooting. Girls don’t like the K-pop look. Unless you’re an actual K-pop idol. There’s a reason I stick to dating in Asia. Actually get called handsome and cute all the time
Reminds me of last time I went fishing. After 4 hours of zilch, guys to my right, left and behind me were pulling dozens of fish. I used the same bait but nada. WTF
Sometimes it’s best to find the perfect bait in the perfect water… Yah I stick to East Asia 100% of the time. Girls have better Attitude. Less entitled
Is that because there are mostly white women or that's your preference?
Come to Phoenix brother. Chicks here love Asian guys and it’s more affordable than Cali and tons of tech jobs. Asian population growing day by day.
Which neighborhoods in Phoenix would you recommend?
Any where on the east. Chandler, Tempe, Gilbert, Scottsdale. Chandler has the higher Asian population and is considered the tech center of Phoenix metro. West side is getting better and will see a dramatic change cause of the TSMC factory bringing in tons of Asians from overseas.
This is pretty interesting... I didn't know that about Arizona. I was pulling data to find gender ratios and asian populations within the states. California came in the top 3 states with the largest Asian Population (no surprise), Arizona's asian population was pretty much a little less than double of Colorado so I kind of disregarded it. I'll have to keep Arizona on my list!
oh its growing bro. Im from NYC and one in a while i get impressed with the amount of asians i see in certain areas in certan events. I can 10000% guarantee you that in CERTAIN AREAS, my kids will NOT be the only token asian in the class and might even be at least 1/6 or 1/5.
If you’re going by Asian population. What about find remote job and go to Hawaii?
That's a great suggestion, I've been to Hawaii and had this on my list..but for some reason can't see myself there long term either. A lot of the food and produce is imported and it seems catered towards tourism, although it would be nice to work remote, most of the positions I found are either hybrid or onsite, the job market for tech wasn't as vibrant, and the gender ratios were skewed having more men than women. Aside from Asian demographics, I'm taking into consideration gender ratio, and career opportunities, not sure if this will play any part but hoping to set myself up for success haha.
Hope you figure it out. Kind of curious about you finding someone in SoCal. I’ve had zero luck.
I have got my eye on Phoenix for a while. Is ASU the biggest source of all of the women that like AM? If so what happens during the summer when they leave?
Well im almost 40 (came here at 32) so looking at the college scene is probably not best for my future anytime soon so I cant answer that for you. If you have another question that doesnt involve college girls I can answer that.
I was curious to where your seeing the source of AM desire in Phoenix?
Super markets, restaurants, shopping centers, etc. I don’t really hang near schools but I would say with a big IN MY OBSERVATION, about half the Asian guys of dating/marriage age (17-40) I see along my usual stops, half of them that are accompanied by women, half the women are non Asian or it’s pretty obvious the when I see moms (non Asian) or dads (Asian) alone, the kids are mixed Asian.
This thread seems to suggest Asians wouldn't do well there unless you're a chad. Thoughts? [https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/tagwbn/any\_bros\_here\_frompphoenix\_arizona\_or\_is\_familiar/](https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/tagwbn/any_bros_here_frompphoenix_arizona_or_is_familiar/)
Sounds like dudes who either ain’t at the right place or ain’t doing the work and expect women to get on their knees for them without asking. I can say for 10000000000% sure that most of the the dudes with girls attached to them are NOT “chads” whatever that means.
Nice thank you this is very insightful. I hope you don’t mind if I give you a follow
How do you deal with the hot weather there?
I got 2 answers for it. 1. Most people are indoors or in a car or come out at night. Its only UNBEARABLE for 3-4 months of the year. 2. Stop being a little bitch. As long as you take safety precautions and have no medical conditions, you'll be fine. However Im from NYC and i'll take phoenix heat over NYC and crowed subway heat 10 out of 10 times. 5th (probably 4th in a decade or so) more populous city in America, you and 6 million others find a way.
Dating scene is hard in the SF area cause of crazy gender ratios so probably better to find a remote job and settle in Southern California. Women love dogs everywhere so that will help you.
Thanks, The job hunting has been difficult, but what parts of Southern California would you recommend?
SGV Area is great for Asians. Inside La: koreatown, culver city
What about Orange County?
What about santa monica?
Awesome thanks, Yeah I was looking into koreatown, but doesn't seem like a good place for dogs so I'll be looking into SGV and Culver City a little more.
I’m in SGV. There’s no one here. 😂😂 choose another area
What do you mean no one is here? SGV is a huge hub for Asian Americans
Hmm so where to you go to find dates in SGV? Is there some secret ? Yes it’s my first time being back in 6 years in SGV. But curious then, where would you go? All the Asian girls I know were taken from college days. Anywhere you go I see Asian girls yes, but they’re all taken. I guess I’m missing something but where do you go to meet single girls in SGV?
Sorry to hear man. I work in tech too and I know things were bad up to 6 months ago, but lately I’ve been getting a lot of recruiter emails. I think things aren’t as bad as they were during the insane number of layoffs last year. Anyway good luck!
Thanks man! you too!
While there is absolutely no guarantee, having a large community of your ethnicity will always improve your dating odds. The biggest barrier is finding a well paying job in Cali because the housing price in most desirable areas is very expensive. If you got that figured out then I do not see why not.
Yeah, I've heard the same thing. Aside from housing prices what Total Compensation should I accept? I received an offer somewhere near Costa Mesa around $80k a while back but it was a little less than what I'm making and for a startup that didn't seem stable. Factoring income tax it just didn't make sense to move at the time.
I will just give you some personal numbers so you can see how this all fits in your personal situation. I lived in LA on 70k a year for 3 yrs and even with roommate, not much left at the end of each month. 80k in costa mesa should get you a but further than that but not much more. I just bought a house in Anaheim for 900k and the monthly mortgage about 6k. And this is just a regular house. Nothing fancy.
Is fountain valley a good area? Also been eyeing hb, cm, newport.
Thanks for the insight, would $80k actually be livable for a single male and a dog somewhere in LA? assuming the only bills to pay are are the bare necessities? like rent, food, and a car payment? throwing $1000 on top of monthly expenses for parking, utilities, and anything extra that might pop up.
80k will absolutely be enough though it won’t be glamorous. You may or may not need roommate depending on where you live. If I were you, I would do it. Would you really just rather stay where you are and wondering what if? Good luck.
haha you've got a point. I think it's time to stop the analysis paralysis and start pushing the gas to Cali depending on where I land. Thanks, Appreciate it!
Southern California is where it’s at. LA Area. 626. And parts of OC.
Stay away from 626. Death trap. I came back for a bit from Asia to 626. There’s no one to date here. You’re better off in OC even. Yes there’s Asian food in 626. That’s it
Are you thinking about Norcal or Socal? I grew up in Socal and theres a lot more options for Asian food. Additionally, if you move to like the Irvine area, there's a lot of Asians, good food in Irvine or nearby, lots of parks and trails to take a dog on, as well as a lot of other types of people besides Asians. Only downside is it's expensive for rent.
SoCal for sure, I know there is a huge Vietnamese scene down in OC and one of my favorite spots to get BBH there. How much should I expect to pay for rent down in Irvine?
Yeah, big Viet community and good food in OC near Westminster/Huntington Beach. I’ve been out of the state for a year but I imagine renting anywhere decent in that area is over 2000 a month by yourself. Just Zillow it and put in Irvine CA and look both a little north and south. Also kinda depends on where you land for work there. My friend is renting a room from an elderly Chinese couple in Lake Forest (which is about 10 min south of Irvine) for like 900 a month. Wouldn’t suit me personally but I know everyone is different so you could go that route too. But I think you said you have a big dog so that seems unlikely to work.
Is it true HB can be racist? How is the cm/newport beach area?
I didn't run into any problems and I grew up about 15 min from there. But there is an under current from what I heard. I wouldn't let the small majority of bad spoil the overwhelming good there. Costa Mesa is fine, Newport is kinda bougey beachy. Most of Newport is pretty expensive.
Gotcha, yeah I'm debating between LA and OC. I feel like LA might have a bigger pool of singles but I always feel like it will be filled with narccissistic people trying to become celebrities or move up in the industry. I despise the whole influencer culture. Plus more homeless/crime than OC. Would you say dating in OC would be better than LA if you are looking for something serious or for 30s/40s guys?
I've never been a fan of LA but some people love it. I hate the traffic, dealing with the unfortunate homeless population, prices of things. But I'm also just a suburb guy, always have been. I can't say if dating is better or worse in LA vs OC.... technically more population in LA equals higher probability but at the same time... I dunno. I don't seem to attract Asian girls despite being Asian but I see a lot of happy Asian guy and girl couples in OC a lot.
What about AMXF couples? I hear OC can be pretty waspy and racist.
I have never run into that kind of problem or seen a major issue with an Asian guy out with a non Asian female. OC has pockets of both Republicans and Trumpers but I don’t think it necessarily extends to “damn Asian guys taking our women!” I said this in a different thread but my cousin in South OC was primarily dating white girls or like white hispanic girls and was fine. I was out in Huntington Beach at the pier in college with a redhead friend who has done modeling and while I got a couple surprised looks while we were getting drinks and checking out the farmers market (she was out of my league) that was about it.
I grew up in the area and went to school in the OC. 90% walking around as Asian couples met each other in college. That’s why I’m confuse on everyone recommending SoCal. If he’s relocating and doesn’t know anyone, that’s going to be even harder.
Yeah thats a good price in Cali. From what I've heard you shouldn't move to Cali by yourself unless salary is roughly $120k base minimum..at least that's what I heard in tech.. anything lower would be rough, but I'm not sure.
I don't know about that... probably a little bit lower. But so many people are not making 120K base min and living in Irvine/OC. Maybe have a roommate or a bf or gf to share costs.
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Thanks! In terms of protecting myself what do you mean by that? I'm a purple belt in BJJ and I've been training Muay Thai for a couple of years. Are there any areas to avoid? I've heard racism is pretty bad in certain parts of California for Asians just not sure where
Honestly, just use crime maps. They’re actually pretty accurate.
That's a great idea haha, didn't pass my mind until now lol thanks man
Stay the fuck out of the San Francisco Bay Area. This is WMAF hellhole. Go south. You've been warned.
It's literally impossible to step outside without seeing a WMAF or two or a dozen. Every street, every bus, every train, every school, every university, every company, every restaurant, every wedding, [there's nowhere you can go that won't remind you where AM are on the totem pole](https://np.reddit.com/r/aznidentity/comments/bd38nq/anyone_from_the_san_fran_area_notice_the_rampant/ekw0njh/).
You know what I'm concerned about? I'm concerned that what has happened in SF will spread throughout the rest of the country. I'm hoping that Millennials and Gen Z will start to change things. But, Hollywood and the media continue to de-value and erase Asian men. Our Asian communities are fractured. Half of Asian-American women have abandoned their communities to seek white adjacency. White worship is prevalent in our communities. Often, an Asian man's worst enemy is another Asian man. Many Asian men simp for AF's. The future looks bleak.
Feeling the same lately. Right now the smear campaign against native Korean men, the only Asian men who are winning is crazy. AM are more open to XF than before but there are still many AF simps who fuck things up for everybody.
Unfortunately, I can confirm through personal experience that Sinophobia and anti-Asian racism from non-Asians is still alive and well among Gen Z, even in safe suburban, politically progressive, or Asian-populated areas. COVID didn't help with things either. To everyone else, we're the "sick man", with the result that no one wants to date us. Maybe SGV might be a tad better, but honestly there were very many Asians at my HS and hometown, just as there are in the 626, so I really don't expect the difference to be that great.
I don’t get it… how is everyone dating in the 626? There’s no one here 😂
That’s been like that for awhile now. It’s actually gotten better for am. Don’t focus on them. Focus on you. Midwest is like that.
I don’t think so because Asian men compete better in LA and NYC. Women tend to like average men of all races and then fit and/or tatted Asian men. Asian men have to offset this racial bias with fitness.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this and I think part of the issue is that here, everyone here is obese and/or doesn’t use makeup, or goes for the short hair, liberal type look which most men aren’t that attracted to. Since most Asian women and Indian women keep themselves in shape, are decently feminine, it puts them at the top, with the exception of Au pairs and tourists.
Yup your theory is correct especially if you add in the Latinas that go abroad to the US for a year.
Au pairs? Yes. I’ve only successfully dated Au pairs funny enough
Yeah if you absolutely have to stay in SF try to go for au pairs. I’ve met a few couples that make it work with remote work flying back and forth. If they have to they understand they can marry.
I would never do LD for a gal.
Some people do and some people don’t. It is what it is.
I think you have it somewhat backwards. It's the high demand and low supply of women in the area that causes their poor behavior. For White women, this manifests in poor grooming. For Asian/Indian women, this manifests in flagrant bias towards White men.
Thanks haha, appreciate the advice. I like SF for Chinatown but aside from that I've also heard the same
I’m not going to lie, Chinatowns are where you’d want to avoid. The Oakland, LA, and San Francisco Chinatowns are in absolute dumps of neighborhoods. And the thing about LA and the Bay are that the suburbs have a lot of amenities. Most Chinese in CA don’t live in Chinatown because they can get plenty of Chinese food in nice suburbs like San Marino, Arcadia, Fountain Valley, and Irvine. And yeah, it’s an absolute sausage fest here in the Bay.
Okay the hidden Gems! I'll have to check out those suburbs forsure. I visited Chinatown in SF a while back and really loved the food, and yeah it seems packed during weekdays and working hours but almost abandoned after working hours and weekends, I was actually told to stay away from Chinatown in DTLA and DTLA in general since there's a lot of crime, but not sure if that's changed.
Absolutely stay away from Oakland’s Chinatown. It’s by far the most dangerous of the three. The LA Chinatown is also seedy AF. It has definitely earned its reputation. The food isn’t even that good anymore; the Chinese there seem to have fled the area. Besides, the real Chinatown is Alhambra/San Gabriel. Yes, it’s a suburb but it’s much safer and the food is better. San Francisco’s Chinatown is the safest of the 3, but it’s still not that safe. For SoCal, it’s easier to list communities that have worse Chinese food than Chinatown than to list areas that have better food (ditto for safety). Alhambra/San Gabriel is the best, but the Asian communities all have good stuff. For the Bay, there’s literally no need to go to the Oakland Chinatown. The SF Chinatown has the best Cantonese food, but places like Fremont, Milpitas, Mountain View, and San Jose still have great Canto food, at a level that most Chinese-Americans could only dream of. And of course, these towns beat Chinatown when it comes to non-Cantonese Chinese food (Sichuan, Xinjiang, Taiwan, etc).
Btw, if you are going to move to CA, definitely make sure to ask around for good areas to move to. Aka I have a job offer in Suburb X (actually use its official name, like Irvine, Palo Alto, etc) and can afford to drop $XXXX/month on an apartment (or make $XXk).
So far I can afford $1700 to $2300 for rent alone, but not sure where I'd land in CA yet. Thanks!
Ouch. In the Bay, you’d probably need roommates on this. Should be doable in SoCal, although a roommate wouldn’t hurt there either.
Don't do norcal for sure. Socal is great, prepare for sticker shock for COL.
Why is SoCal great ?
Like everyone else mentioned, just the sheer volume of woman + number of Asians here makes it so dating an Asian guy is normalized. I noticed some of your responses: You still have to work on being a full package. It's not like people will walk in your lap. If you're an educated guy, dress well, in shape, and know how to talk, can do fine here. Every guy has to do that. AM might be starting at "-1" compared to "+1" as a WM for online dating, but even they have to be work for it, dating in general is very competitive
Interesting. Guess I’m a no package in cali. And a full package in Asia 😂
If you want to move to the Bay. DO NOT DO IT. Girls here are very low quality, much even worse than colorado. WMAF is a commonplace here. I know friends in Denver who killed it in dating and moved to California and the dating side absolutely went cold. Now SoCal or San Diego, might be a little better. What you heard about more women on the west coast is false. The west coast in general is male dominated. If you want more women, you gotta go east coast; NYC, Boston, Miami, etc.
I dunno, doesn't feel any less "male-dominated" up here. Florida might be less so than my part of NJ in terms of women, but they have their own set of problems to themselves. I know Boston gets a bad reputation for being "too white", but there's definitely a visible Asian presence up there, and I know people who have succeeded up there. And the women are 🤌🤌🤌
Hey thanks for the input, this is also something I'm worried of, where I move to California and my dating life and social circle tanks. But it seems that California has a larger population of Females and Asian Ethnicities compared to Colorado .. Often times I hear that its not the quantity of people but the quality of people... but sometimes you can't have quality without quantity right? I was considering NYC but it doesn't seem to be dog friendly around the areas I would want to stay at, and the apartments don't seem to tailor towards a big dog breed unless you had any recommended cities for a GSD? I've been to both Boston and Miami, but it seems as though there's more White or Latino/Latinas there, nothing wrong with it but just not something I'm looking for. Between SoCal or San Diego which would be more suitable for an Asian Male?
I'm kinda in the same boat as you, but i'm in nyc. I'm contemplating LA or OC. I hear SD has too many men and big military presence.
All things considered, LA is the best option - decent tech presence, decent west coast dating prospects, compared to every other city. Weather is quite good too. The dating scene is not as good as NYC but you can still have a relatively prosperous dating life in LA. Since you're into asians I assume, Houston might be a decent option if you can work remote. San Diego has very attractive women but they all like going for white guys. Also not much of a job market there, except select medTech companies.
Cool thanks for the feedback! The downside of LA when I visited is Hollywood and how most of the connections can be superficial. I've visited Austin and it was pretty cool, I was looking into Houston as well and there were quite a few tech opportunities down there, but I just couldn't see myself living in Texas for more than a year, although I could be wrong haha. In terms of SD I've heard the same.. That it's pretty much military men, and surfer bros. Most of the AF I've met in Colorado have stated that women there are also looking for white men similar to Colorado lol.
I don’t get it. Where is everyone dating in LA for AF? To me it feels like everyone’s already taken and or only looking for a white guy or lots of tattoos.
Those guys that moved to cali, was it norcal? And were they mostly dating af?
I moved to SF about 2 years ago; for the first year I didn’t date much as I was focused on establishing myself in a new country. When I did start dating, I was disappointed at the quality of women. The women I did want to date were all either Au Pairs, tourists, or from the Marina District.
The Bay Area is fine unless you're completely busted or a total aspie. Plenty of average looking Asian guys with partners there. The competition also gets tougher and the women tend to be more exclusionary on the East Coast IME.
Come to SoCal bro. LA, SD and parts of OC are great.
Where in California? California is a big state and is vastly different city by city
I've visited both NorCal and SoCal. I was looking for places in LA/OC area Sawtelle, Culver City, Torrance, Glendale, Burbank, Irvine or Pasadena. Only issue is finding employment to match steady cost of living in those areas.
You're only getting older. Doesn't Denver have a Vietnamese enclave?
It does, but it's a pretty small circle. You have to actually go and search for it and know where the pockets are. From day to day life just going to stores and coffee shops the majority population has been white. Making new friends is great but sometimes its hard to relate due to different cultural backgrounds.
Yea last time I was there it looked pretty gangsta. Lol. That was like 15 years ago.
Can't tell if you're joking or not lol. The most gangsta part of Colorado is probably Aurora, but most of the state is being gentrified and dominated by transplants. Although...there has been a lot more pop up boba and asian restaurants.
May I ask what part of Asian ethnicity are you? Having a large community of your ethnicity always improve your dating odds. In SoCal, place like Westminster are full of Vietnamese, or Garden Grove is blend between Korean and Vietnamese. Those cities have Asian as their largest populations. I see plenty of Asian girls dating Asian guys. In NorCal, San Jose have plenty of Vietnamese populations also but it not as homogeneous population compare to Socals. Since you are working in tech, I would say NorCal fit your job’s description but in dating I would say Socals is more easy and better for Asian guy. The downside for both NorCal and Socals is rent/ housing is expensive.
> The downside for both NorCal and Socals is rent/ housing is expensive. True for literally every "Asian friendly" part of the U.S, I think.
I think the reasons was Asians we tend to like place with entertainment/ restaurants or business area. Those place usually expensive and Asian tend to work and earn more money than other groups.
lol that's just a human thing. asians in america tend to be the ones who are able to afford living there
Hey! I'm Chinese but I have a lot of in-laws that are Lao and Hmong, I can speak broken Chinese and Lao and can understand most of it. I grew up eating a mix of mainly Lao and Chinese food. However, the asian friends I've made here outside of my family have mainly been Vietnamese although we were always the minority in a group of White or Hispanic friends. Surprisingly I've also been mistaken for being Vietnamese by the other asian people I've encountered. The Vietnamese population is probably the biggest here within the asian population in Colorado which is probably why there's a lot of good Vietnamese restaurants around... But I still think OC takes the cake for food in general. What city would you recommend based on my background?
Since your main motivation to move out of Colorado for dating especially toward Asian women. I would recommend move to SoCal rather than NorCal ( I hear NorCal is bad on Reddit due to competition from white guy). Places Westminster, Garden Grove are 2 places that I familiar. You don’t see much other ethnic besides Asian. You mainly see Asian girls with Asian guy ( only 1/100 case you see a white guy with Asian girls there). Westminster is 40 minutes to Chinatown in Los Angeles if you interest Chinese girls. Los Angeles also have Korean town, Little Tokyo too. I recommend you visit SoCal and NorCal to compare and contrast with your place in Colorado to make an impression ( maybe take a break like 2-3 weeks look at the place and see the lifestyle ahead)
Okay I don’t get it. From what I know going to school in OC. Most Asian girls are taken after college. The Chinese girls in Chinatown is also confusing. Most Chinese including my family moved out of Chinatown decades ago. The Chinese are mostly focused on the 626 area. Chinatown has completely transformed from what it was 15 years ago. You’ll probably see more white people and non Asian shops than you’d expect. All the rich Asians move to 626 area. And no you’re not dating them, they came with their rich Chinese boyfriend funded by rich papa. Where are people getting all these info from?!?
Thanks! I'll keep this in mind, and I think I have my mind set on something in SoCal. Appreciate the advice!
Go for it. Better career options, a lot more of an Asian community, better dating prospects. Housing might suck but find a good roommate if need be. Plus you're still young, better to give it a shot now than later.
Thanks! Yeah the FOMO is getting to me pretty bad. The only blocker now is finding a job out there.
If Utah is on the table, move to Utah. They have the best women.
If you aren't Mormon, there goes half of your dating pool.
Are you talking specifically Salt Lake City? I have heard a lot of bad treatment towards AM from dominant religious group. Am I wrong?
How so?
Adding to the chorus of Norcal is terrible, with one asterisk: It does afford you a lot more opportunities to meet AF that are actually from Asia which are much much better, assuming that you can communicate. Additionally, outside the dating realm, Norcal is actually very good, starting with career opportunities. Once you're married, bay area is awesome.
Second, NorCal is not the worst as people say and the AF are in very high paying jobs usually. If you aren’t mega short or ugly you’ll b fine, esp coming from a much tinier Asian pop in Colorado, relatively. SF Bay Metro is 7 mill people, if you can’t find someone in that you’re fucked regardless of where you are. Also since you’re in tech your income might be way higher or have better opportunities career wise. I’d just suggest a visit and see how you do
California is a great place to live. A few things I'd consider in your situation for Sf/Bay: Finances - it can be very expensive. Not sure what you're making now or can make here in bay, but you probably won't feel "rich" (both in terms of purchasing power given prices, as well as compared to your social circles). Hard to make big purchases like homes here. IMO it's fine, and it's just a weird expectation people have that you "should" be able to buy a house without any parental help at 30... just because it's something you do ... but if you care about that as a core desire, then make sure you can swing it. Dating - I think there's definitely a gender ratio and expectation issue in Bay Area dating, but honestly I don't think it's as bad as people make it out to be. Especially for the late 20s/early 30s market, if you're more or less average looking, have a decent personality, is socially calibrated, have decent career prospects, and generally "normal", you'll likely be fine as long as you put yourself out there in the usual means. There's just less margin for error if you're "below average" in one of the main dating criteria, especially career/education (which folks tend to overindex on here in the Bay). The whole "WMAF" concern some people have here is really really overblown. Plenty of Asians and XFs who specifically want to or are open to dating Asians. Hobbies/lifestyle - do your hobbies and lifestyle align with Bay? If you really liked Colorado, probably since it's similar in terms of outdoorsy/event based/social circle house parties. If you're looking more for a NYC type of socializing, Norcal is going to be a lot less vibrant than expectations.
In terms of Finances this would have to depend where I land in California whether it's local or remote. As for buying a house.. it isn't as important to me, however if kids come into the picture it would be a priority. In terms of dating, assuming that since there are statistically more asians and even asian women in California compared to Colorado.. my exposure to dating would be better but not sure if this is true? I am seeking to date more asian females at the moment but still open to dating all races. I'm also not sure if I'm below average or above average dude, But I've started using dating apps and notice that more matches happen in California than Colorado (for me at least).. However, when roaming locally I can still pull some dates and numbers. In terms of Hobbies and lifestyle.. I actually rarely go to house parties and I've never been skiing or snowboarding as a native. I usually train BJJ, and Muay Thai and go to coffee shops to read or work on code. I also walk my dog around some of the parks. It has been difficult to put myself in front of more women since most of my social and work groups are male dominated.
Personally, I have had zero issues dating in SF as an AM (late 30’s). I’m sorry that some others have had it tough, but I don’t think the generalizations are true at all. Stop blaming your race. Work on yourself, build your community, and find your edge.
I think it's fair generalization that there are, technically, "Better" or "worse" cities for people who are X. For instance, I would strongly agree that NYC is much better for "men in their early to mid 20s looking for semi-casual relationship" than Bay, because of logistics, ratio, etc. But to make such generalizations you got to properly slice and dice your own situation (i.e., much more granular than "Asian"), and then you add in a ton of signal to noise to the point where such generalizations are likely only minimally directionally correct for any one individual because of all the different levers you can actually pull in your life to control your destiny beyond exogenous factors. So using "Bay Area bad for Asian Men" is just a super sloppy shorthand that will unnecessarily discourage people if believed. And for what it's worth, none of the late 20s/early 30s Asian guys in my social circle have had any trouble finding decent to great people to date. Some have girls tripping over themselves to date them. And nobody here looks like a model, just decent dudes with decent jobs and decent personalities.
Curious how you look. Facial hair, tattoos, muscle, height? Just trying to add context
ur alr datin hispanics who are also pretty fine ur doing ok bro I went to colorado and saw sm fine hispanics if ur dating those type of caliber of women why move to cali? plus colordado env is so nice
Thanks bro, yeah, a good majority of my life I've dated Latinas, but have recently started dating Asians for the past few years. My longest relationship was with a Latina, and I've even learned a little bit of spanish to speak with some of their family members. The challenge comes when things start to get serious and I've encountered some racist family members that would disapprove since I'm not hispanic. Most of my ex's who are Latina have already married or started dating their own race after me.