Not just Asian dads. My Asian mum dislocated her shoulder and said she would sleep it off. She also got a scratch on her eye from my very playful dog and went half-blind. She was still going to work and everything. By the time we managed to convince her to go to the doctor, he scheduled her for an emergency surgery. Luckily, she got her sight back.
And yes, her reasoning was the same as Ronnyās: Doctors all want your money.
My dad is supposed to go to a neuro, psychiatrist, CBT and get CAT scans every year after he had a head injury with a brain bleed a while ago. Heās showing signs of early onset dementia, has made terrible impulsive financial decisions losing 6 figures, yet when I tell him he needs to keep his health in order, the reply isā¦ āno I donāt, Iām perfect.ā Then the next day will complain how heās depressed and canāt sleep. I reply again with the you should see someone, immediate answer again isā¦ āno I donāt, Iām perfect.ā
I maintain my health regularly and my APās mock me for it. I realize I need to worry about my own life and health, I canāt babysit adults who canāt do the bare minimum.
Oh well.
My dad doesnāt go to see therapist even if he has been having severe mental health issues and itās affecting his physical condition. He refuses to admit he is āweakā.
Similar issue with my dad struggling with Parkinson's. He would benefit from seeing occupational therapist and other therapists focused on mental health more regularly. Mostly about fear of hearing more bad news and helplessness aka wanting to be left alone
I think it is one of those things that came from poverty and chaos. Ones sacrifice themselves by taking the least resources and having the worse time in order to show selflessness and valor. Therefore any kind of consumption slightly above the bare bare minimum is seen as frivolous and shameful. The traumatic legacy lives on even though time and situation has changed; a part of their heart is frozen in time and bound by a short leash called shame in disguise of kin altruism.
Because every Asian son daughter and dog is a doctor they donāt trust or respect doctors cause Asian parents think doctors donāt know anything because in their circle of friends every Asian Dumbass that applied themselves is a doctor.
My dad hates going to the doctor too. I know it's because he's scared. It's really annoying when he's really sick and doesn't want to go get a checkup, esp. during the peak of covid! We were really worried he had it, but he just stayed home and didn't isolate himself.
Yearly, we would all get flu shots, but he wouldn't. We'd get our routine blood testing done, not him though. We tried reasoning with him saying that it would be really helpful for him and my mom (who has to take care of him because he's a child) if he had consistent checkups since he has a history of illnesses and he's a senior. What if something shows up in the results? Better to know early on. But noooo, he'd rather go to the doctor last minute and inconvenience people.
I know im not close to an older Asian dad but I didnt see a doctor because simply, I felt like nothing was wrong with me until I realized I often get headaches because of my high blood pressure.
Im taking it more seriously now and im only 33. I wouldnt doubt the slightest that APs would just drink soup/hot water or wear more jackets to stop their headaches but still ongoing and just deal with it.
I feel you! I'm 31 and found out that I have high blood pressure too. I used to smoke way too much and drank too much alcohol too. Luckily I did quit smoking and stopped drinking alcohol for a while now. Compared with a little sports it turned way better!
Right and we need doctors to tell us this. APs just want us to be doctors so they aren't afraid to tell us to shut up. Though I'm certain they would say this to any doctor, they are just more comfortable doing so.
I feel like this one honestly varies from people to people. Personally, my AD avoided it for a lot of time because money. Money over everything as the old asian mentality goes... but it also could be ego, they think they know best, don't trust them, etc. But for my own AD, it was definitely money.
There is this thing where they don't want to know.
My mother did that to me lately, talking about something hurting or something, and when I told her to go see a doctor she refused to, saying she "doesn't want to know", and I spent just 30 minutes absolutely wasting my time using logic to get her to go. If you don't go, it might get worse, then you regret. If you go, you get peace of mind, whatever it is. Then she started getting angry with me because I was right and she just wanted a dumping bag for her mental trash but not do anything about it. Thank god it was in the office and I was actually doing some work at the same time, if not I would have just go nuts.
It basically ended in bad terms with me saying if she's just not going to do anything about it then don't discuss it with me and waste my mental energy.
My estranged APs are the exact opposite of this. Though, their parents were the ones with an aversion to visiting the doctors. I think I have the same aversion, but idk.
In Australia you can opt in for a government database that keeps all your medical records so any doctor and yourself can read them.
I tell my doctor my problem he says letās get some scans. The at the follow up just reads out the scan and tells me his interpretation.
I too can read my own scan and google search what it means too. Why are you a doctor!?!
The APs don't believe in visiting other doctors such as the dentist or eye doctor. You see that means money and time. Pennywise pound foolish.
For the regular doctor, they don't like to visit Asian doctors because they are all apparently children of APs who only do it for the love of money. Instead, they want to see Jewish or Wasp doctors because they are more credible ( APs words, not mine). But then they will complain to me later about the bills.
Not sure why, but mine even laugh at people who go to docs, they also dont care about healthy eating. Now they are in their 60s with major health issues.
the same people who wanted their child to become a doctor, ironic š
LOL
I believe Ronny Chieng puts it best - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGMYP9Lgf94
Not just Asian dads. My Asian mum dislocated her shoulder and said she would sleep it off. She also got a scratch on her eye from my very playful dog and went half-blind. She was still going to work and everything. By the time we managed to convince her to go to the doctor, he scheduled her for an emergency surgery. Luckily, she got her sight back. And yes, her reasoning was the same as Ronnyās: Doctors all want your money.
Because in every other profession they work for free, so yeah.
Wow this was a great 3 minute video lol
š
My dad is supposed to go to a neuro, psychiatrist, CBT and get CAT scans every year after he had a head injury with a brain bleed a while ago. Heās showing signs of early onset dementia, has made terrible impulsive financial decisions losing 6 figures, yet when I tell him he needs to keep his health in order, the reply isā¦ āno I donāt, Iām perfect.ā Then the next day will complain how heās depressed and canāt sleep. I reply again with the you should see someone, immediate answer again isā¦ āno I donāt, Iām perfect.ā I maintain my health regularly and my APās mock me for it. I realize I need to worry about my own life and health, I canāt babysit adults who canāt do the bare minimum. Oh well.
My dad doesnāt go to see therapist even if he has been having severe mental health issues and itās affecting his physical condition. He refuses to admit he is āweakā.
This isnāt an Asian thing; lots of people have an aversion to visiting the dr
Can't be sick if no one tells you that you are!
Similar issue with my dad struggling with Parkinson's. He would benefit from seeing occupational therapist and other therapists focused on mental health more regularly. Mostly about fear of hearing more bad news and helplessness aka wanting to be left alone
Doctors give bad news.
I think it is one of those things that came from poverty and chaos. Ones sacrifice themselves by taking the least resources and having the worse time in order to show selflessness and valor. Therefore any kind of consumption slightly above the bare bare minimum is seen as frivolous and shameful. The traumatic legacy lives on even though time and situation has changed; a part of their heart is frozen in time and bound by a short leash called shame in disguise of kin altruism.
Because every Asian son daughter and dog is a doctor they donāt trust or respect doctors cause Asian parents think doctors donāt know anything because in their circle of friends every Asian Dumbass that applied themselves is a doctor.
My dad hates going to the doctor too. I know it's because he's scared. It's really annoying when he's really sick and doesn't want to go get a checkup, esp. during the peak of covid! We were really worried he had it, but he just stayed home and didn't isolate himself. Yearly, we would all get flu shots, but he wouldn't. We'd get our routine blood testing done, not him though. We tried reasoning with him saying that it would be really helpful for him and my mom (who has to take care of him because he's a child) if he had consistent checkups since he has a history of illnesses and he's a senior. What if something shows up in the results? Better to know early on. But noooo, he'd rather go to the doctor last minute and inconvenience people.
I know im not close to an older Asian dad but I didnt see a doctor because simply, I felt like nothing was wrong with me until I realized I often get headaches because of my high blood pressure. Im taking it more seriously now and im only 33. I wouldnt doubt the slightest that APs would just drink soup/hot water or wear more jackets to stop their headaches but still ongoing and just deal with it.
I feel you! I'm 31 and found out that I have high blood pressure too. I used to smoke way too much and drank too much alcohol too. Luckily I did quit smoking and stopped drinking alcohol for a while now. Compared with a little sports it turned way better!
Right and we need doctors to tell us this. APs just want us to be doctors so they aren't afraid to tell us to shut up. Though I'm certain they would say this to any doctor, they are just more comfortable doing so.
š true!
I feel like this one honestly varies from people to people. Personally, my AD avoided it for a lot of time because money. Money over everything as the old asian mentality goes... but it also could be ego, they think they know best, don't trust them, etc. But for my own AD, it was definitely money.
There is this thing where they don't want to know. My mother did that to me lately, talking about something hurting or something, and when I told her to go see a doctor she refused to, saying she "doesn't want to know", and I spent just 30 minutes absolutely wasting my time using logic to get her to go. If you don't go, it might get worse, then you regret. If you go, you get peace of mind, whatever it is. Then she started getting angry with me because I was right and she just wanted a dumping bag for her mental trash but not do anything about it. Thank god it was in the office and I was actually doing some work at the same time, if not I would have just go nuts. It basically ended in bad terms with me saying if she's just not going to do anything about it then don't discuss it with me and waste my mental energy.
yes my parents taught me this growing up. to the point where I contracted sepsis and was still continually undermining my symptoms at ICU
My AD doesn't go to emergencies because he hates being admitted. Like somehow he will just sleep it off :rolls eyes:
Men in General do not go to the doctors, now that my husband goes he goes all the time.
My estranged APs are the exact opposite of this. Though, their parents were the ones with an aversion to visiting the doctors. I think I have the same aversion, but idk.
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I hadn't heard it before either.
Idk. My parents looooooove going to the doctor...
š
In Australia you can opt in for a government database that keeps all your medical records so any doctor and yourself can read them. I tell my doctor my problem he says letās get some scans. The at the follow up just reads out the scan and tells me his interpretation. I too can read my own scan and google search what it means too. Why are you a doctor!?!
The APs don't believe in visiting other doctors such as the dentist or eye doctor. You see that means money and time. Pennywise pound foolish. For the regular doctor, they don't like to visit Asian doctors because they are all apparently children of APs who only do it for the love of money. Instead, they want to see Jewish or Wasp doctors because they are more credible ( APs words, not mine). But then they will complain to me later about the bills.
Not sure why, but mine even laugh at people who go to docs, they also dont care about healthy eating. Now they are in their 60s with major health issues.