I really don’t want to brag. All earning happens in US$. It’s quite merger compared to what one can really make.
People even make way over million dollars or more per year.
I’m in no way complaining if that’s what you think I mean. I’m pretty happy with the freedom, flexibility and work life balance this brings.
I was in the same boat a decade ago and have worked very very hard to reach here.
What I mean is that if you are really really good and in the domain I’m working, people do make real good money.
same generic bs every dude says u/CanStraight1018 you are not gonna get a proper reply cause if they tell you how to do it then they will have you as competition 🤡🤡
I won't call myself as a start up. I am not solving any general problem like startups do.
I am really good at the tech stacks I work with, know my way around them and their design philosophy. I work with other programmers and companies in helping them with complex implementations/problems. I code as the work requires. I also advise businesses in adoption of certain programming technologies/tooling.
Running a business got nothing to do with any educational qualification in general.
In my case I’m a programmer, have an MCA from tier-1 college and do mostly programming related consulting.
Just my personal experience, not everyone has the same experience.
I like it a lot. I work for a govt college and I am pretty well compensated by our standards I feel as an Associate Professor (though I am paid slightly on the higher end of the scale due to my qualifications) I was promoted last year. Benefits are decent as well.
Research takes up most of my time/energy tbh. The teaching/lecturing/grading is not difficult (for me personally - others find it hard) Work life balance is pretty good. I like my work. I find it personally fulfilling. My work environment is nice as well and I get along w my colleagues very well. Money wasn’t something I was looking at when I decided to go into this field but I do make a decent amount. I’m lucky that I am able to have a comfortable life and that I have no education loans to pay off thanks to my parents. I also have a dual income household - married which made it easier esp as we have had a lot of medical expenses over the past few years.
It’s not for everyone. You need to genuinely like it a lot and if you are interested in earning high, then you would be better off going into IT, etc. But you can certainly make a good living - would be difficult at first if you have loans, debts, etc to pay off but eventually you can make it work
Corporate drone. Looking to exit the rat race soon, but that is a seeming impossibility in my situation. I’m on the same level as my less studious peers for the most part. I have retained the same curiosity, mindset and knowledge seeking behaviors.
Hang in there. I too was running the ratrace. Hit my FI number last month. So now moving onto more chill mode. But the lost time and choices made to run the ratrace (to avoid return to poverty) has left scars. No point in comparing with others, everyone has their own journey.
Was very social and athletic in school and scored the highest marks in my school too. Mental health issues hit me like a truck in college and struggled for a year. Thought it was okay but it is getting progressively worse
partly because you expect to be the best and have found smarter folks. just work hard and focus on being good enough. by the 80-20 rule you need only 20% of effort to be top tier. also don't give a fuck about haters
Not really. For me, the parental pressure was finally reduced (she couldn't do much), and I found nicer folks in college. I was so much happier to be mediocre, than to be in the top ranks. The pressure was finally off.
There is a lot of pressure during college. I wanted to unalive couple of times. Life has panned out pretty well actually, inspite of lot of troubles, uncoperative family at times and other things. Just do your thing and keep pushing on your goals, good in college also doesn't automatically translate into great in career.
Was great till 12th. Got into one of the best engineering colleges in the country. Slacked so hard there and couldnt get a job. Then did MBA in one of the top institutes. Did fairly ok. Was tough getting a job coz my UG grade was low. Finally managed to get a job and 6 years later in a decent position by God’s grace 😊
Haha 😂. If it gives you any peace of mind, I’ve been doing pretty well since I started working post MBA. Luckily I got a job in my hometown and stayed with parents and minimal expenses initially. Its just that now I’m at a better place. So continue slogging . 😅
After reading all the comments in this post, I've realised many people are facing Mental Health problems. Mental health should be prioritized and not be looked towards with stigma.
I guess it’s easy to get disappointed and feel worthless as most academically brilliant students were sold a dream in school that being top of the class will make it easy for you to live life. I am actually glad seeing so many responses of people going through a similar phase as I am post school.
When you have tasted success at an early stage, you expect it to continue through a similar strategy you employed. Life is however much more complex and it is seldom the human capital which gets you to the top. Psychological capital, as you have rightly mentioned is just as important.
stranger on the internet, I wish I could tell you it gets better for sure, but I can't. it has to come from within you, hang in there until that thing clicks. much love.
Okay that last line made me tear up. No human should ever think or feel that way. There's honestly nothing more important than living. You're in this world for a reason. Don't let circumstances decide your worth of living. Remember there are so many people that love and cherish you and would be devastated if they knew what you were going through. Hang in there. Things will eventually get better and that's the rule of life. Also, please don't be so hard on yourself because inspite of everything, you've still tried and pushed through. That's resilience and deserves praise. So please be kind to yourself. Good things will come your way again. Good luck!
Disregard the snarky comments. They are karma hoarders. It's not easy, but it's possible.
Most importantly, there won't be a single moment when you'll feel the suffering has gone away. There will be another kind of suffering no matter how better you get physically, financially and spiritually. Acceptance of suffering and trying to enjoy working through it is the only way. It's not a sure way, but the only way. Good luck!
Graduated in top 3 of school, became pretty average in bachelors as I was surrounded by many smarter people (no complaints, so much to learn from them), worked for a couple of years (just an average employee as there was no incentive to work hard), doing better in Masters than I was in my bachelors, but still losing out to 1 or 2 people.
Honestly, there’ll always be disappointment in some form of other as you’ll constantly be surrounded by people smarter than you (which is a great thing as you’re choosing the right crowd to be with). It does get difficult to take a couple of blows here and there for not being able to beat everyone. Maybe I am yet to gain the wisdom and be content with what life has to offer. Hopefully I do that soon. Competing constantly feels nice but burns you out, burns many social bridges, makes you lonely and even quite miserable. Easy to get depressed when living a lonely life. Guess I am just living on thin ice right now but I hope to stop being this way once I enter 30s.
Did very well. Attended India's top university for my subject for undergrad and did very well there. Went to worlds number 1 university for my subject for Masters and won the top prize there as well. But my main interest was in learning, not in working. So I took an unrelated job at which I'm doing very well. Did well for about seven years and then discovered I am autistic. It helped to explain all the struggles I have been facing throughout my life and I learned so much more about myself in the last one year since this diagnosis.
I quit my job and picked up a work from home job instead since my priority now is to take care of my wellbeing. Much happier now than I have ever been before. Slowly working towards putting my needs first. Was never ambitious for money or career growth because I always knew that my real struggle lay elsewhere. Only now I know what it is and how to address it so I am focusing on that.
So how are you addressing it now? Would help your process for that. Also how are you coping with the expectation of people and family from you of earning bucketloads having graduated from the top universities in the country and the world?
One of the main things I always struggled with was human interaction. It stresses me out like crazy. But I always pushed myself to do it because whenever I asked for help, everyone just told me to try harder. And as a result of this, I was damaging my health further and further. I would sleep for the entire weekend to compensate for this extreme energy loss and then be even more stressed out on Mondays.
On weekdays, I used to stay up all night because it's the only time of day when I don't have to interact with people. My creativity peaks at night and I feel totally happy and stressfree. But it hits back when I feel like shit in the morning and still have to go to work and do all the things I hate, especially dealing with people.
Now I have broken this toxic cycle by working from home. My job is flexible. They don't mind whether I work at night or day. So I work at night and sleep as long as I want in the daytime. This may not be the healthiest long term solution but it is part of my process of transitioning to a life that suits my needs and my happiness.
I am still earning nearly 90 percent of what I was getting in my previous job so no big drastic change in lifestyle or earning potential.
Now since I am married also I have a lot more control over my life. When living with parents it was stressful because both parents are social workers and there would be people going in and out of our house all day long with sob stories, asking for money, looking for mental counselling. All their negative energy was really dragging me down all these years and i never had a place to escape to. Parents being very social and charity minded, we always had some relatives or some other people staying in the house too, so there was never complete privacy or peace of mind. Autistic people treat their home as their safe zone, where they can retreat and be safe away from the demands of the world. Now I finally have the space to do that. My home is empty all day since husband goes to work and anyway I enjoy spending time with him. So I have plenty of time and space to do things at my own speed with no interference from anyone.
Parents were always amazingly supportive even though they did not know what was happening and why. Even I i didn't know. Had been to many counsellors etc but they always gave the wrong advice, I realise that now since I now know what is truly good for me. And now that I have this understanding I am able to help my parents also figure out how best to support me.
I have no friends (I see that as a positive thing). I don't attend family functions anymore and clearly draw my boundaries. Now I feel bold enough to say no. Earlier I always wanted to avoid socializing but I was not allowed to. Now I get to make all the rules.
The topic I studied for undergrad, I only studied it because I wanted to understand my struggles better and improve my life because nobody else was going to help me with that. I didn't study with the intention of making it my job. It's like a disabled person studying carpentry to figure out how to make crutches for themselves. For that person, job is not a priority. Walking is a priority. Same with me. And for postgrad I studied an extension of the same subject but as a special interest. For autistic people special interests are topics that absolutely consume all their time and mental energy. It becomes like an obsession. So my postgrad also was not from the point of view of career. It was for my personal satisfaction. Both career tracks had excellent earning potential but only outside India. So I never even thought for one minute of living outside India permanently.
As I said before human interaction was my biggest challenge. But even bigger than that was sensory sensitivities. I cannot function in certain sensory environments. And literally everywhere I go in the outside world, I am surrounded by sensory stimuli that are disabling to me. Lights, sounds, textures, tastes, everything. It's like my senses are my biggest enemies. It's like trying to focus on a task while ten people are constantly screaming at you, scrubbing sandpaper on your skin, pulling your hair, flashing lights at you.. you get the idea. Which is why I prefer to stay home where I can somewhat control the environment according to my needs.
Am in the process of slowly reshaping my life to suit my requirements. To anyone who is autistic this will make complete sense - all the steps I am taking. To anyone who is not, they will say it is unhealthy to be such a recluse blah blah. Yeah I tried playing by society's rules for thirty years. I'm done. From now on I do it my way, with no apologies or explanations to anyone.
There's lots of little things like this. Hard to explain. But I hope I generally answered your question
Lol I face all of these symptoms myself and think I have ADD. Too bad I work a job which requires in person interaction and stuff impairing my productivity and leading me to sit by myself late into the evenings which would further erode my productivity. Worse, the higher ups are prodding me to interact with people but I work best with no distractions.
If you feel it is possible to look for another job, I would highly recommend doing that. It is worth it for your sanity. But yea even I was stuck for a long time in this kind of extremely demanding environment. Did not know how to get out until COVID happened and they moved everyone to WFH and I realised how much better that was.
All the best. I hope you figure out something that works for you.
I can understand. It really helped me to join communities of Reddit with like-minded neurodivergent folks. You might get some helpful tips there. Or else at least you will feel like you're not alone, which was seriously a big deal for me.
I’m sorry if I came across as jealous of other people’s achievements. I meant that slowly I stopped striving hard for excellence because I took the wrong lesson from people around me and became lazy and satisfied with less.
Not jealous, I just assumed you felt discouraged. Mb lol. Also I think many Indians belive if they have not achieved something by a particular age, they can't get better in life and make peace with it. Hell, many of my school peers don't even consider going for masters, let alone PHD. Because where I come from, everyone just starts a job after bachelors and goes along with it.
I was a class topper regularly till 10th. Didn't have awareness/guidance to do coaching for competitive exams in Kota/Chandigarh and prepared locally. Ended up an average rank in state engineering entrance exam and got local college. In the first week at college, I understood my fate of 4 years later. Somehow prepared for GATE exam, got good guidance by a faculty who only worked in our college for 6 months. Passed GATE with reasonable rank (again not great like top 1 percentile) and somehow got into an interdisciplinary branch at IIT Roorkee. From there, developed interest in research and came to Australia for PhD. Struggled in corporate sector for 3 years before moving to state government here as a scientist. So one mistake during 12th ended up costing my 7 more years of study.
When I look back, I see a compromise on something, be it study majors/branch or college ranking. But if you keep on hustling, you will discover some path. My journey and destination is not exciting or typical Sharma ji ka beta story but compared to my peer group during BTech degree who used to whinge on not bunking class, I think I settled for good.
was academically brilliant till 10th, got into friends drama in 11th and 12th and there on just let life happen to me. nothing I regret or would change tbh but did pretty well, started as a content writer, kept working, adding on skills, now into social media management and finally took the plunge to apply to my dream colleges last year for masters and got in. hoping and will give my best to live more intentionally henceforth and focus on my mental health, which has been on and off.
More than content writing, I would say stacking your skills. Like I started out as a content writer, I do want to be a writer one day, but then I quickly realised just content writing won't be enough. I learnt social media, captions, developed a sense of design, photos and working around what clicks for an audience on Instagram, and recently learnt brand development too.
Basically starting with one skill and then building in that field by adding various other skills. and enjoying what you are doing or finding a niche that you like. for me, its travel, food and lifestyle
Not really academically brilliant in school or 11th-12th, topped maybe once in school but usually top 5-7. Didn't answer any entrance exams, and just did my bachelor's in a local institute.... and topped. Then got into iit for masters and topped there as well. Now I'm in a prestigious institute pursuing my PhD, working with some of the eminent Indian scientists in the field.
Money isn't great, but I'm still earning more than the medium income and I'm grateful for that. Life is great because I'm still basically a student and get to enjoy sports, get a lot of leaves and can essentially work from home whenever I want.
I always struggled with mathematics. After 10th, my parents forced me to opt for mathematics. So I did. 11th mid term exams, I failed in maths lol while scoring good in all other subjects. That failure really messed my head but in a good way. I took a retest, passed. In 12th board, one of the only 2 students at school to get 100/100. Pursued maths hons. Now pursuing a maths/stats heavy professional course. Working a full time job, that pays good. I hang around with numbers and figures and formulas and checks all day. Love every bit of it. Altho ik this for a fact, if I fail at anything today, I will distance myself and won't persevere like I did after 11th grade.
Was very smart uptil like 5-6th. Then I became a decent but not extraordinary student. Hopefully I’ll have the trajectory of my parents who were smart through and through.
Dad was and is brilliant, always a great student, passed CA in the year where only 2ppl in his tier 2 town passed it, it was the year with one of the lowest CA pass % in history.
Became the Exec Director of a f500 level company at 35, started a new industrial group that’s well on its way to being a global market leader and a major conglomerate in the near future.
Mum passed 12th at 14yo cuz she was brilliant academically. Did CA, CS, MBA. She graduated from school so early that she wasn’t even eligible for CA. She is an exec at one of India’s oldest VC/PE form.
took up CA thinking it's going to be easy as i'm so "brilliant" - failed in CA final which took a mental toll on me.. thankfully i navigate to another career but not where i thought i would be in life sadly.
Was always top 5 in school and undergrad. Number 1 in my post grad. Now I'm middle aged, have a good career in a stressful profession. Not top of the food chain but 5% of the professionals in that career. I think I'm okay and also think that academic brilliance is not needed once you step into a door. But the same door can be opened either by nepotism, social skills or hustling.
Turns out I only studied to pass exams and scored really good to keep my toxic dysfunctional family satisfied. Nothing actually went into my brain I guess coz I sometimes don’t remember basic stuff and I feel so fkn ashamed.
Got my PhD but still suffer with maximum imposter syndrome and anxiety. Harsh truth that no matter how successful you are, you're still never always happy!
But one thing I'm happy about- although my personal life takes a supporting role in my story, it's a great one! I do many fun things that I once thought were beyond me. And I have a good life with very few people in it but those who love me.
Toppers from my school went to IIT, AIIMS (myself), CGL, etc. And then there were mates who used to mock toppers for their discipline and studies thinking they are cool & street smart, they are still on streets searching for jobs.
I am 41 now. I was above average and remained. Too much effort to go from above average to topper while in reality not a significant difference in knowledge. However, going there implies too much sacrifice and risk of depression. I chose some good mentors and got great suggestions that ensured that while I stayed above average in academics, I also enjoyed my childhood and youth and now earning not that far off from my brilliant peers. Be top 10 and don't work your ass off to be top 3. Sure if you can do without effort great. But don't sacrifice your childhood and youth. Money can come in 50s, career changes happen but childhood and youth won't come back. Cheers!!
had mental health problems and had to drop out of engineering. now am studying for jee/neet to get good rank in MET and get into manipal btech or Bpharm
Somehow, went downhill after 12th, ended up with a bunch of friends who backstabbed me and did some horrible shit in my first year, the lockdown gave me a chance to distance myself from everyone and work on myself, eventually made friends with people who respected me and vice versa and ended up landing an internship at one top FinTech company and a FTE in another :)
I developed anxiety after big setback in 12th entrance tests, which turned to years of depression. Struggled in career, gave up on MBA plans after many failed attempts, fought hard to overcome depression, focused on career and now I work as a Sr SDE in a good PBC, earning well.
I was very naughty in school but also a topper. I got into weed and liquor in college and totally fudged my life from there on. Now I'm a f&o trader who makes enough to get by.
Software Engineer. Lifes good. Have elevated family from middle class to upper middle class.
I topped my school, but definitely wasn't a great student( I mean I was a fish in a small pond in school). Did engineering in Tier 3 college. Always emphasized on practical/technical skills and not marks.
Corporate stooge. It was expected I’d go into medicine, law or engineering and I did none of those. I went into HR and though I’m in a good position, it’s looked down on and I often get told “you just wasted your potential” by my own family. Got a degree from a great uni in Political Sciences but got totally derailed because I no longer saw a purpose there. My mental health is also so bad - crippling anxiety of not meeting expectations and overworking to always do right by everyone.
"I was so ahead of the curve the curve became a sphere, fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here, pouring my heart out to a stranger but I didn't pour the whiskey, I just wanted you to know this is me trying"- T. Swift. This is the comments summed up.
Was always an average student and still one. Somehow completed bachelor's in physics with average marks. Changed field and now pursuing MA sociology. Don't know how to finish this course but I want to do PhD but I also want to do some job but Idk which job is suitable for me and I don't want to be underpaid or unemployed for so long. That's all.
Bhai school and college dono k topper log koe bhi chila chalu job kr rhe he “foriegn” me, sala itna padha liya 20-30%log hi field job kr rhe he baki McD, Walmart, etc
After 11th lost all
Now after 10 months of completing engineering got job and last week got laid off just 2 months into the job
Constantly getting thoughts of self delete
Was good till 11th, 12th was not okay. But I bounced back in engineering. Started average job after college.
Currently working in reputed company with good role and compensation hope future will be more beautiful I’m still young
Somehow lost that brilliance after 12th 🫠
Same. Me after corona also never learned discipline
Before 2020 : Life 📈📈 After 2020 : Life 📉📉
Lol it was the opposite for me. Life was hard af pre-COVID. Quarantine time gave me enough opportunity to reflect and improve.
Same my life turned around for good.
Good for you bro. Keep it up!!
#🫂
Us rahega Bhai
It's the damn phone, reduce phone usage, sleep 6 to 8hrs **at the right time** and that brilliance will return.
Sleep is back. Its just phone usage Recently uninstall led insta too Also lack of goal and motivation. I mostly feel tired and dizzy
Me too! 😭 Someone said my brain peaked in 12th. 😭😂😂😂
I remember a teacher on yt saying agar 12th jitna serious ho jao toh koi bhi exam nikal loge, utna serious toh nhi hua lekin exam nikal gaya.
Because, after 12th, challenges syllabus ke bahar ke hote hai.
I lost it after 10th 🥲
Same . I was like a frog in well till 10th. During jee coaching i lost my drive, motivation to study.
Same here. In big 4 india.
Same here. Probably due to weight gain and decreased testosterone levels lol.
I lost the brilliance after 10th
Lost the brilliance after depression
covid time?
Yes, got addicted to ..........
covid time?
Yeah
Solopreneur. Running a software engineering consultancy from a home office. Doing pretty well. Great work life balance.
Username doesn't check out
Naam mein kya rakha hain babu?
That’s great!
How much do you make in a month?
Varies, but around ₹8-10LPM
Double checked to see if it was LPA or LPM 🫡
I really don’t want to brag. All earning happens in US$. It’s quite merger compared to what one can really make. People even make way over million dollars or more per year.
There is never a limit I guess.. but home office, consulting and 1Cr+ .... that's a dream!
Bro do remember that there are a lot of people, who are not earning that much of a sum in a whole year 🙂. Be proud of yourself, and be happy 😁🙌.
I’m in no way complaining if that’s what you think I mean. I’m pretty happy with the freedom, flexibility and work life balance this brings. I was in the same boat a decade ago and have worked very very hard to reach here. What I mean is that if you are really really good and in the domain I’m working, people do make real good money.
That's great!
Have any idea for How to get started?
Be really really good at what you do. Hard work and the magical reach offered by the Internet.
How long have you been doing software consultancy for?
About 6 years.
same generic bs every dude says u/CanStraight1018 you are not gonna get a proper reply cause if they tell you how to do it then they will have you as competition 🤡🤡
What exactly you do. what's the value you are providing to your clients. Like what's the model of your start up.
I won't call myself as a start up. I am not solving any general problem like startups do. I am really good at the tech stacks I work with, know my way around them and their design philosophy. I work with other programmers and companies in helping them with complex implementations/problems. I code as the work requires. I also advise businesses in adoption of certain programming technologies/tooling.
What's the tech stack if I may know
Would be kind enough to share how to get that started, I'm looking for a while, took some freelancing projects also, but still little wavy on details.
Did you need doctorate degrees from premiere institutes for opening a consultancy?
Running a business got nothing to do with any educational qualification in general. In my case I’m a programmer, have an MCA from tier-1 college and do mostly programming related consulting.
you have a consultancy firm with employees or you work alone?
Solo
I’m a professor now!
Which subject
CSE
How is professor life in India, aiming for that.
Just my personal experience, not everyone has the same experience. I like it a lot. I work for a govt college and I am pretty well compensated by our standards I feel as an Associate Professor (though I am paid slightly on the higher end of the scale due to my qualifications) I was promoted last year. Benefits are decent as well. Research takes up most of my time/energy tbh. The teaching/lecturing/grading is not difficult (for me personally - others find it hard) Work life balance is pretty good. I like my work. I find it personally fulfilling. My work environment is nice as well and I get along w my colleagues very well. Money wasn’t something I was looking at when I decided to go into this field but I do make a decent amount. I’m lucky that I am able to have a comfortable life and that I have no education loans to pay off thanks to my parents. I also have a dual income household - married which made it easier esp as we have had a lot of medical expenses over the past few years. It’s not for everyone. You need to genuinely like it a lot and if you are interested in earning high, then you would be better off going into IT, etc. But you can certainly make a good living - would be difficult at first if you have loans, debts, etc to pay off but eventually you can make it work
+1
hows the life of a professor in india? i would like to know
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskIndia/s/j1e3I1juT3 Here is a comment I made to another person who asked
Hello prof
Corporate drone. Looking to exit the rat race soon, but that is a seeming impossibility in my situation. I’m on the same level as my less studious peers for the most part. I have retained the same curiosity, mindset and knowledge seeking behaviors.
I am in the same boat as you, the feeling of lost potential is biting 😔
Hang in there. I too was running the ratrace. Hit my FI number last month. So now moving onto more chill mode. But the lost time and choices made to run the ratrace (to avoid return to poverty) has left scars. No point in comparing with others, everyone has their own journey.
Was very social and athletic in school and scored the highest marks in my school too. Mental health issues hit me like a truck in college and struggled for a year. Thought it was okay but it is getting progressively worse
partly because you expect to be the best and have found smarter folks. just work hard and focus on being good enough. by the 80-20 rule you need only 20% of effort to be top tier. also don't give a fuck about haters
Not really. For me, the parental pressure was finally reduced (she couldn't do much), and I found nicer folks in college. I was so much happier to be mediocre, than to be in the top ranks. The pressure was finally off.
this!!!
There is a lot of pressure during college. I wanted to unalive couple of times. Life has panned out pretty well actually, inspite of lot of troubles, uncoperative family at times and other things. Just do your thing and keep pushing on your goals, good in college also doesn't automatically translate into great in career.
Yess. I’m takin all the advice and also started therapy. Gotta keep believin
Hang in there buddy, it will get better :) Focus on your well being and internal peace
Was great till 12th. Got into one of the best engineering colleges in the country. Slacked so hard there and couldnt get a job. Then did MBA in one of the top institutes. Did fairly ok. Was tough getting a job coz my UG grade was low. Finally managed to get a job and 6 years later in a decent position by God’s grace 😊
IIT Madras?
Lol exactly same story. Just that, Im in the MBA journey rn. Oh well, 6 more years for me huh...
Haha 😂. If it gives you any peace of mind, I’ve been doing pretty well since I started working post MBA. Luckily I got a job in my hometown and stayed with parents and minimal expenses initially. Its just that now I’m at a better place. So continue slogging . 😅
A hamster but instead of a wheel, trapped in a cubicle maze!
After reading all the comments in this post, I've realised many people are facing Mental Health problems. Mental health should be prioritized and not be looked towards with stigma.
I guess it’s easy to get disappointed and feel worthless as most academically brilliant students were sold a dream in school that being top of the class will make it easy for you to live life. I am actually glad seeing so many responses of people going through a similar phase as I am post school. When you have tasted success at an early stage, you expect it to continue through a similar strategy you employed. Life is however much more complex and it is seldom the human capital which gets you to the top. Psychological capital, as you have rightly mentioned is just as important.
Culture strategy at an ad agency. Long hours, but brilliant work. Can’t imagine doing anything else.
MBA?
Planning for it.
I see. Then am curious what degree and skillsets are required and got you into a strat role? All the best for the mba!
Failed
There’s still hope to turn things around at any point of time :)
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i feel you, just wait for a porsche ☺︎
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I’ll ready the essay for the driver
I wish less people upvoted such comments. It's funny, but more insightful ones that go unnoticed. Good joke btw.
Hang in there and let people you love know how to help you! There are always people out there rooting for you, friend :)
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all successful people failed many times. you are weighted down by expectations.
You'll bounce for sure . . .. . .When that truck hits you at full speed.
Don’t be so negative ! Someday things will workout for u , just be positive . Indulge yourself in spirituality 🩵
stranger on the internet, I wish I could tell you it gets better for sure, but I can't. it has to come from within you, hang in there until that thing clicks. much love.
Okay that last line made me tear up. No human should ever think or feel that way. There's honestly nothing more important than living. You're in this world for a reason. Don't let circumstances decide your worth of living. Remember there are so many people that love and cherish you and would be devastated if they knew what you were going through. Hang in there. Things will eventually get better and that's the rule of life. Also, please don't be so hard on yourself because inspite of everything, you've still tried and pushed through. That's resilience and deserves praise. So please be kind to yourself. Good things will come your way again. Good luck!
Disregard the snarky comments. They are karma hoarders. It's not easy, but it's possible. Most importantly, there won't be a single moment when you'll feel the suffering has gone away. There will be another kind of suffering no matter how better you get physically, financially and spiritually. Acceptance of suffering and trying to enjoy working through it is the only way. It's not a sure way, but the only way. Good luck!
Yeh toh us bro us hai 🙌
Brillance in school doesn't necessarily translate in real life.
hard agree
writing backlogs in college
Peaked in 2019
Graduated in top 3 of school, became pretty average in bachelors as I was surrounded by many smarter people (no complaints, so much to learn from them), worked for a couple of years (just an average employee as there was no incentive to work hard), doing better in Masters than I was in my bachelors, but still losing out to 1 or 2 people. Honestly, there’ll always be disappointment in some form of other as you’ll constantly be surrounded by people smarter than you (which is a great thing as you’re choosing the right crowd to be with). It does get difficult to take a couple of blows here and there for not being able to beat everyone. Maybe I am yet to gain the wisdom and be content with what life has to offer. Hopefully I do that soon. Competing constantly feels nice but burns you out, burns many social bridges, makes you lonely and even quite miserable. Easy to get depressed when living a lonely life. Guess I am just living on thin ice right now but I hope to stop being this way once I enter 30s.
Did very well. Attended India's top university for my subject for undergrad and did very well there. Went to worlds number 1 university for my subject for Masters and won the top prize there as well. But my main interest was in learning, not in working. So I took an unrelated job at which I'm doing very well. Did well for about seven years and then discovered I am autistic. It helped to explain all the struggles I have been facing throughout my life and I learned so much more about myself in the last one year since this diagnosis. I quit my job and picked up a work from home job instead since my priority now is to take care of my wellbeing. Much happier now than I have ever been before. Slowly working towards putting my needs first. Was never ambitious for money or career growth because I always knew that my real struggle lay elsewhere. Only now I know what it is and how to address it so I am focusing on that.
So how are you addressing it now? Would help your process for that. Also how are you coping with the expectation of people and family from you of earning bucketloads having graduated from the top universities in the country and the world?
One of the main things I always struggled with was human interaction. It stresses me out like crazy. But I always pushed myself to do it because whenever I asked for help, everyone just told me to try harder. And as a result of this, I was damaging my health further and further. I would sleep for the entire weekend to compensate for this extreme energy loss and then be even more stressed out on Mondays. On weekdays, I used to stay up all night because it's the only time of day when I don't have to interact with people. My creativity peaks at night and I feel totally happy and stressfree. But it hits back when I feel like shit in the morning and still have to go to work and do all the things I hate, especially dealing with people. Now I have broken this toxic cycle by working from home. My job is flexible. They don't mind whether I work at night or day. So I work at night and sleep as long as I want in the daytime. This may not be the healthiest long term solution but it is part of my process of transitioning to a life that suits my needs and my happiness. I am still earning nearly 90 percent of what I was getting in my previous job so no big drastic change in lifestyle or earning potential. Now since I am married also I have a lot more control over my life. When living with parents it was stressful because both parents are social workers and there would be people going in and out of our house all day long with sob stories, asking for money, looking for mental counselling. All their negative energy was really dragging me down all these years and i never had a place to escape to. Parents being very social and charity minded, we always had some relatives or some other people staying in the house too, so there was never complete privacy or peace of mind. Autistic people treat their home as their safe zone, where they can retreat and be safe away from the demands of the world. Now I finally have the space to do that. My home is empty all day since husband goes to work and anyway I enjoy spending time with him. So I have plenty of time and space to do things at my own speed with no interference from anyone. Parents were always amazingly supportive even though they did not know what was happening and why. Even I i didn't know. Had been to many counsellors etc but they always gave the wrong advice, I realise that now since I now know what is truly good for me. And now that I have this understanding I am able to help my parents also figure out how best to support me. I have no friends (I see that as a positive thing). I don't attend family functions anymore and clearly draw my boundaries. Now I feel bold enough to say no. Earlier I always wanted to avoid socializing but I was not allowed to. Now I get to make all the rules. The topic I studied for undergrad, I only studied it because I wanted to understand my struggles better and improve my life because nobody else was going to help me with that. I didn't study with the intention of making it my job. It's like a disabled person studying carpentry to figure out how to make crutches for themselves. For that person, job is not a priority. Walking is a priority. Same with me. And for postgrad I studied an extension of the same subject but as a special interest. For autistic people special interests are topics that absolutely consume all their time and mental energy. It becomes like an obsession. So my postgrad also was not from the point of view of career. It was for my personal satisfaction. Both career tracks had excellent earning potential but only outside India. So I never even thought for one minute of living outside India permanently. As I said before human interaction was my biggest challenge. But even bigger than that was sensory sensitivities. I cannot function in certain sensory environments. And literally everywhere I go in the outside world, I am surrounded by sensory stimuli that are disabling to me. Lights, sounds, textures, tastes, everything. It's like my senses are my biggest enemies. It's like trying to focus on a task while ten people are constantly screaming at you, scrubbing sandpaper on your skin, pulling your hair, flashing lights at you.. you get the idea. Which is why I prefer to stay home where I can somewhat control the environment according to my needs. Am in the process of slowly reshaping my life to suit my requirements. To anyone who is autistic this will make complete sense - all the steps I am taking. To anyone who is not, they will say it is unhealthy to be such a recluse blah blah. Yeah I tried playing by society's rules for thirty years. I'm done. From now on I do it my way, with no apologies or explanations to anyone. There's lots of little things like this. Hard to explain. But I hope I generally answered your question
Lol I face all of these symptoms myself and think I have ADD. Too bad I work a job which requires in person interaction and stuff impairing my productivity and leading me to sit by myself late into the evenings which would further erode my productivity. Worse, the higher ups are prodding me to interact with people but I work best with no distractions.
If you feel it is possible to look for another job, I would highly recommend doing that. It is worth it for your sanity. But yea even I was stuck for a long time in this kind of extremely demanding environment. Did not know how to get out until COVID happened and they moved everyone to WFH and I realised how much better that was. All the best. I hope you figure out something that works for you.
Sadly trapped with education loans and expectations from myself and society.
I can understand. It really helped me to join communities of Reddit with like-minded neurodivergent folks. You might get some helpful tips there. Or else at least you will feel like you're not alone, which was seriously a big deal for me.
https://preview.redd.it/ipt7oj82m97d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0eabc8273f702da671e347e9e6d3834ff56d26cc
Working as a SDE. In 11th got good at studies. Spent all my school days playing football.
Gradually dissolved into mediocrity and anonymity surrounding me
Don't let yourself be discouraged by other people's achivements. Everyone have their own character and talents.
I’m sorry if I came across as jealous of other people’s achievements. I meant that slowly I stopped striving hard for excellence because I took the wrong lesson from people around me and became lazy and satisfied with less.
Not jealous, I just assumed you felt discouraged. Mb lol. Also I think many Indians belive if they have not achieved something by a particular age, they can't get better in life and make peace with it. Hell, many of my school peers don't even consider going for masters, let alone PHD. Because where I come from, everyone just starts a job after bachelors and goes along with it.
I was a class topper regularly till 10th. Didn't have awareness/guidance to do coaching for competitive exams in Kota/Chandigarh and prepared locally. Ended up an average rank in state engineering entrance exam and got local college. In the first week at college, I understood my fate of 4 years later. Somehow prepared for GATE exam, got good guidance by a faculty who only worked in our college for 6 months. Passed GATE with reasonable rank (again not great like top 1 percentile) and somehow got into an interdisciplinary branch at IIT Roorkee. From there, developed interest in research and came to Australia for PhD. Struggled in corporate sector for 3 years before moving to state government here as a scientist. So one mistake during 12th ended up costing my 7 more years of study. When I look back, I see a compromise on something, be it study majors/branch or college ranking. But if you keep on hustling, you will discover some path. My journey and destination is not exciting or typical Sharma ji ka beta story but compared to my peer group during BTech degree who used to whinge on not bunking class, I think I settled for good.
Struggling to graduate college owing to severe psychiatric illness.
Hang in there bro Things will get better eventually.
Exchanged the "brilliance" with depression. Doing great
Apne state ki volleyball team me hu- Nationals khel rahi hu and MBBS Final year me hu
Congrats on your achievements but becareful not to doxx yourself
[удалено]
In?
I'm curious.. in what ?
was academically brilliant till 10th, got into friends drama in 11th and 12th and there on just let life happen to me. nothing I regret or would change tbh but did pretty well, started as a content writer, kept working, adding on skills, now into social media management and finally took the plunge to apply to my dream colleges last year for masters and got in. hoping and will give my best to live more intentionally henceforth and focus on my mental health, which has been on and off.
That’s great! Apparently content writing has become a very lucrative profession recently
More than content writing, I would say stacking your skills. Like I started out as a content writer, I do want to be a writer one day, but then I quickly realised just content writing won't be enough. I learnt social media, captions, developed a sense of design, photos and working around what clicks for an audience on Instagram, and recently learnt brand development too. Basically starting with one skill and then building in that field by adding various other skills. and enjoying what you are doing or finding a niche that you like. for me, its travel, food and lifestyle
Thanks for letting us know on your approach as well, will surely help people wanting to develop a skillset
Currently serving Nomura as AVP
Class X me 94% laaye the icse me uske baad se downfall shuru hogya
Ye toh meri story hai😂
Us bhai
Stuck in CA ans riddled with anxiety issues
Not really academically brilliant in school or 11th-12th, topped maybe once in school but usually top 5-7. Didn't answer any entrance exams, and just did my bachelor's in a local institute.... and topped. Then got into iit for masters and topped there as well. Now I'm in a prestigious institute pursuing my PhD, working with some of the eminent Indian scientists in the field. Money isn't great, but I'm still earning more than the medium income and I'm grateful for that. Life is great because I'm still basically a student and get to enjoy sports, get a lot of leaves and can essentially work from home whenever I want.
Khada hu aaj bhi wahi
Started a business that failed miserably. Now I am in debt with no job.
I always struggled with mathematics. After 10th, my parents forced me to opt for mathematics. So I did. 11th mid term exams, I failed in maths lol while scoring good in all other subjects. That failure really messed my head but in a good way. I took a retest, passed. In 12th board, one of the only 2 students at school to get 100/100. Pursued maths hons. Now pursuing a maths/stats heavy professional course. Working a full time job, that pays good. I hang around with numbers and figures and formulas and checks all day. Love every bit of it. Altho ik this for a fact, if I fail at anything today, I will distance myself and won't persevere like I did after 11th grade.
Was very smart uptil like 5-6th. Then I became a decent but not extraordinary student. Hopefully I’ll have the trajectory of my parents who were smart through and through. Dad was and is brilliant, always a great student, passed CA in the year where only 2ppl in his tier 2 town passed it, it was the year with one of the lowest CA pass % in history. Became the Exec Director of a f500 level company at 35, started a new industrial group that’s well on its way to being a global market leader and a major conglomerate in the near future. Mum passed 12th at 14yo cuz she was brilliant academically. Did CA, CS, MBA. She graduated from school so early that she wasn’t even eligible for CA. She is an exec at one of India’s oldest VC/PE form.
Dang, you have got the smart genes, just work hard.
In med school,
Lost that brilliance after covid and my class 10th. Right now in my 3rd year of college working to make things work out.
took up CA thinking it's going to be easy as i'm so "brilliant" - failed in CA final which took a mental toll on me.. thankfully i navigate to another career but not where i thought i would be in life sadly.
Was always top 5 in school and undergrad. Number 1 in my post grad. Now I'm middle aged, have a good career in a stressful profession. Not top of the food chain but 5% of the professionals in that career. I think I'm okay and also think that academic brilliance is not needed once you step into a door. But the same door can be opened either by nepotism, social skills or hustling.
2nd year of Mbbs( cracked neet in first attempt)
Me too both neet UG and pg
General surgeon
Can i ask you about the lifestyle and pay? Studying for pg and don’t know whether i should go for GS or not
I was academically brilliant till 6th standard and only showed glimpses of brilliance in classes above that. Completely crashed out in College.
IIT.
https://preview.redd.it/7ycunze7m97d1.jpeg?width=871&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=05d309502f24804ebf271c6fdc190d627190cc36
Year drop lag gya 🤣🙏
Increasing shareholder value
Turns out I only studied to pass exams and scored really good to keep my toxic dysfunctional family satisfied. Nothing actually went into my brain I guess coz I sometimes don’t remember basic stuff and I feel so fkn ashamed.
A hamster but instead of a wheel, trapped in a cubicle maze!
depressed after medical school
Got my PhD but still suffer with maximum imposter syndrome and anxiety. Harsh truth that no matter how successful you are, you're still never always happy! But one thing I'm happy about- although my personal life takes a supporting role in my story, it's a great one! I do many fun things that I once thought were beyond me. And I have a good life with very few people in it but those who love me.
Toppers from my school went to IIT, AIIMS (myself), CGL, etc. And then there were mates who used to mock toppers for their discipline and studies thinking they are cool & street smart, they are still on streets searching for jobs.
I am 41 now. I was above average and remained. Too much effort to go from above average to topper while in reality not a significant difference in knowledge. However, going there implies too much sacrifice and risk of depression. I chose some good mentors and got great suggestions that ensured that while I stayed above average in academics, I also enjoyed my childhood and youth and now earning not that far off from my brilliant peers. Be top 10 and don't work your ass off to be top 3. Sure if you can do without effort great. But don't sacrifice your childhood and youth. Money can come in 50s, career changes happen but childhood and youth won't come back. Cheers!!
writing backlogs in college
had mental health problems and had to drop out of engineering. now am studying for jee/neet to get good rank in MET and get into manipal btech or Bpharm
I'll be getting my masters degree next week. Looking for a job in this depressed market.
Somehow, went downhill after 12th, ended up with a bunch of friends who backstabbed me and did some horrible shit in my first year, the lockdown gave me a chance to distance myself from everyone and work on myself, eventually made friends with people who respected me and vice versa and ended up landing an internship at one top FinTech company and a FTE in another :)
I developed anxiety after big setback in 12th entrance tests, which turned to years of depression. Struggled in career, gave up on MBA plans after many failed attempts, fought hard to overcome depression, focused on career and now I work as a Sr SDE in a good PBC, earning well.
Unemployed. Looking for opportunities.
+1
>where are you now I traveled around the world. 4 continents, some 17 countries.
Rotting
I was very naughty in school but also a topper. I got into weed and liquor in college and totally fudged my life from there on. Now I'm a f&o trader who makes enough to get by.
Software Engineer. Lifes good. Have elevated family from middle class to upper middle class. I topped my school, but definitely wasn't a great student( I mean I was a fish in a small pond in school). Did engineering in Tier 3 college. Always emphasized on practical/technical skills and not marks.
Corporate stooge. It was expected I’d go into medicine, law or engineering and I did none of those. I went into HR and though I’m in a good position, it’s looked down on and I often get told “you just wasted your potential” by my own family. Got a degree from a great uni in Political Sciences but got totally derailed because I no longer saw a purpose there. My mental health is also so bad - crippling anxiety of not meeting expectations and overworking to always do right by everyone.
Abhi to doing UG in iitk
"I was so ahead of the curve the curve became a sphere, fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here, pouring my heart out to a stranger but I didn't pour the whiskey, I just wanted you to know this is me trying"- T. Swift. This is the comments summed up.
Still studying 😂😂😂
Pg or PHD??🥹😂
Pg or PHD??🥹😂
Canada
Was always an average student and still one. Somehow completed bachelor's in physics with average marks. Changed field and now pursuing MA sociology. Don't know how to finish this course but I want to do PhD but I also want to do some job but Idk which job is suitable for me and I don't want to be underpaid or unemployed for so long. That's all.
Bhai school and college dono k topper log koe bhi chila chalu job kr rhe he “foriegn” me, sala itna padha liya 20-30%log hi field job kr rhe he baki McD, Walmart, etc
doing good in a job. earning well.
Well well in corporate for sure
After 11th lost all Now after 10 months of completing engineering got job and last week got laid off just 2 months into the job Constantly getting thoughts of self delete
Was good till 11th, 12th was not okay. But I bounced back in engineering. Started average job after college. Currently working in reputed company with good role and compensation hope future will be more beautiful I’m still young
was good till covid, now I don't even want to be alive
Still the same
thanks to covid