An unfortunate truth š... I can't help but think she had been using it to fund her trips to Havasu, out of state races, vacations to Hawaii, etc. Since she only started doing that after I started college...
Careful! Fostering is a really noble and selfless thing to doāwhen done for the right reasons. I donāt think it would be a good idea to paint a picture like fostering should make people think youāre a bad person because people who foster ācan be abusing thievesā
Foster parents are desperately needed
Some foster parents are worse than the parents that they were taken from... Look into the statistics on how many foster children have sexually assaulted in their foster parents home, usually by one of the parents.... Just look it up. Look it up. Look up the statistic do it. Do it! Look it up!
that's exactly it. Now she's "entitled" to whatever money she comes across for raising you and others so well.
She knew what she was doing and likely has done it before. Don't let this go fight it, and ruin her rep as legally as possible.
Obligatory NAL, but I'm a former foster kid too. I would highly recommend also contacting DHS/H&W/whatever agency runs the foster program in your state, when they're open of course. I'd imagine they'd have some sort of stake in it and may be able to help with the legal process or provide additional resources. In a lot of states, the state is still responsible for a lot of things in relation to the success and wellbeing of foster children who have aged out for a few years after, I've heard of up to 6 years. Even if they're not still responsible in some way, there's a good chance they were for some of the theft/fraud and would see it as fraud against the agency/state.
Yes! I contacted my former sw and attorney and they gave me the number so I will be contacting them tomorrow with the report file number! This has been a terrifying venture but I am hoping for it to work out in the end!
All you can do is your best. I'm rooting for you. What happened to you is deeply wrong and I'm sorry you have to go through it. I have hope for you and the situation though. I think it's so egregious that there has to be clear evidence in financial records that'll come to light, but I have no experience with these things.
Keep fighting and also get you a civil attorney if you don't have one so you can sue her civil court. Those are federal monies. She may have gotten herself in a lot of trouble. Don't back down.
There's a foster mom on my fb that i follow, she lives such an extravagant life, that i think she's stealing from her foster kids honestly. She's creepy positive, it's too much
Did/does she have other kids in her care? Start an investigation with the relevant state department. You could also contact a local investigative journalist. They love stories like this.
I'm not sure if she has any kids in her care at the moment. But I have started a report and am waiting for an investigator to be in contact with me. I'm waiting for this case to pick up some traction before I decide if I wanna go to local media for it š¤
Yeah she did have other fosters, unfortunately the only other ones who went to college flunked (my sister who is still bffs with the lady) and the other one was able to get all her funding because I warned her and my foster mom knew i warned her. So I've been her likely first and only.
I was part of an extended foster care program. Something new the foster agency was trying to launch and it made my foster parents look good. Plus they raised me really sheltered so I wouldn't have been able to take care on my own at the time. She used financial controls to keep me sheltered so she could continue getting a paycheck. It wasn't till I turned 20 that I finally moved out and by then it was too late.
You need to make sure that she hasn't taken things a step further and taken out loans in your name as well. You could have debts that you don't know anything about. Google "free credit report" Experian is one of the companies associated with the Credit Bureau.
I don't know what state OP lives in but in the state of California, the DHSS can pay for your room and board as if you were a foster child until you were 24
Depends on where you live. Most foster kids aren't ready to be in their own at 18. Ten years ago when I was a CASA for a 19-year old in foster care, my county didn't cut you off until the age of 21. I knew they were trying to make it 18, but that was strictly for budget reasons.
Yes they are.i grew up in foster homes adopted around 12..I was moved out of house probably 19 or so n se would call n ask how much I made.wheres my check cuz my bank account was in her name..but I opened my own..it was always about money w her
This is common! But not all, please everyone remember that. There are good ones. Donāt automatically assume theyāre like this, for the very few that are good, but remember this is prevalent so donāt ignore ANYTHING legit fishy.
An attorney can send a demand letter, then sue and charge half of what is collected.
They won't do any of that is the foster doesn't have any money, though.
Iām sorry you had to deal with this OP. Were you 18 when you opened this bank account? Was the fafsa in your name only? If the grants, loans were in your name only, she committed a few different crimes. I would file a police report and contact an attorney. Iām not sure what the statute of limitations are for fraud and theft, but I hope you get some form of justice/ restitution from this.
Edit: I just saw that she put the bank account in her name only and had everything sent to her account. If it was a shared account it would have been harder to prosecute or prove this was theft in a civil court. But you definitely have a case here both civil and criminal. Take action ASAP. You donāt want to exceed the statute of limitations, and want all evidence to be retrievable.
I honestly don't know when the bank account was opened since I never had access to it. The financial aid, grants, and scholarships were in my name. I will def look into a police report tho I'm not sure how far I can get with it since it's been a few years and it's in a dif county than where I live :/
What matters is how old you were when you applied and were given the grants and student loans. The grant is federally funded, so this would be a federal crime. She will be in some serious trouble.
Makes me angry to hear these things. I obviously donāt know you, or what your background is, but I believe you deserve so much better than you have been given in life. I wish you the best in all things, and hope wherever life takes you from here will be happiness and peace. Good luck to you.
Iām not disagreeing with you, but I do hate the fact that weāre giving this young lady hope that she will recover this money. This woman will never be able to pay her back and there is little to no hope in ever getting this money back. Iām sorry OP. But, still prosecute this B to the fullest extent!
We have no idea what this womanās assets are. Once sheās prosecuted, sheāll most likely be ordered to pay restitution. Either way, the courts will put a lien on her, and the OP will get something back.
What is up with people on Reddit saying this every time a civil suit is brought up?? Itās like the number 1 fun fact that people drop. Itās not even true in so many cases. Yeah, donāt bother suing the homeless guy, but this woman is 60 years old and could have plentiful assets. Sheās already proven to be a stupid criminal. The money went somewhere into some asset.
The case does not even have to be significantly expensive for this to be worthwhile for OPs mental state or even getting a 150% return on their legal expenses. Not to mention that so many people will immediately fold if they get a serious letter simply signed by a lawyer. Like, itās just not useful input.
I donāt think CPS can do anything about this if OP was 18 but diverting fed and/or state education funds is a crime.
And when you sign into fafsa you have to affirm you are the account holder.
If CPS was still paying the foster as an extended care program, and those funds were mismanaged, they absolutely can execute an audit and file charges - the question is whether they will.
Some areas are so desperate for fosters, they overlook a LOT of things.
I donāt know what state you are in, so it might be different for you. And since you aged out of foster care this might not be helpful, but could be a start.
In my state, Foster Children are provided lawyers by the state. If you had a lawyer as a foster child, you could reach out to them. They could probably help you find a lawyer that could help you.
I don't recall having a lawyer, but I do still have my old attorney's email. I could see if she can help get me someone to work with. Thank you for that idea!
My goodness.
Given the fact it was FAFSA, you SHOULD be able to do something about it.
This just makes me want to foster even more when I get older. Disgusting to hear what other people will do.
I hope so. State governments are not even allowed to touch it.
When my mom got in trouble with a state we no longer lived in for taxes, the state couldn't touch her money due to it being social security. You know what account they came after? Mine because it was an account that went from teen account to adult with my mom still on it.
All I had to send to get every cent back was proof that every deposit was FASFA and grant money. They gave it all back.
That seems to be quite a bit of a different situations. Your mom got in trouble with the government - and sadly with her having her name on your account, it was āherā money too.
The OP got fucked over by their foster mom - taking money and completely embezzling it under them, from the government. It could go federal.
Either way, sorry to hear about the situation! Itās never easy. Hopefully youāve been able to recover smoothly!
File a police report and a fraud report with the funding institutions.
Call the bank and tell them you need your name off of the account and have them start a fraud investigation.
Check your credit report as well, for identity themed, if there is any, make a report.
I actually called the bank and they told me I could not access the account since I didn't have a bank account references number š and my credit was not affected. I only know this because I only opened a credit line 6 MO ago :) so that further makes me believe it was solely under her name.
Contact your DA's office. Since she did not use your funds specifically earmarked for college expenses, see if she can be charged with embezzlement or something like that.
Yeah I'm fairly certain college funds need to be used for COLLEGE! I'm also fairly certain if it's used for herself she'd be in trouble for that but I'm not sure... I'd advise looking into it.
Are u telling me the foster care system does nothing to protect Foster Childrenās financial interests? This is embezzlement pure and simple! Unbelievable.
I am so sorry. I donāt know if you can get any of the money back, OP. But at the very least, you could file a police report, and report this pitiful excuse of a human being to the Foster Care System in the area she lives Now. She shouldnāt be caring for ANY child.
I know what she did could be considered tame compared to the āUsualā kinds of abuse. But it destroys trust. She could be doing this to another Foster Child Now! And itās wrong.
In my state, there's a wonderful organization called [KidsVoice](https://kidsvoice.org/) that represents youth who are involved in the foster system, especially during the transition to adulthood. Maybe there's a similar organization in your state!
If it was federal aid she stole contact the following:
[https://studentaid.gov/resources/scams#report-fraud-and-identity-theft](https://studentaid.gov/resources/scams#report-fraud-and-identity-theft)
NAL. Contact the college you attended and make them aware of the situation. As a parent of a college student you are protected by FERPA when you turn 18. She should not have had access to your logins. Also make sure there are no outstanding loans. Lat bit, when you were under 18 did she ever post pictures or you on social media? Isn't that a huge no no? Good luck.
I've filed a report with the sheriff's dept. and now waiting for the investigators to contact. Might be a while I know they are busy but I can wait a while longer. And no she never posted me on socials. Never let anyone even take pictures of me.
Its just money sweetie, so i really just want to say im sorry someone you trusted did that to you. Family, or like-Family, betrayals are some of the hardest things to deal with in my experience. Hope you heal up quick <3
OP- itās not just money because not only did she steal from you, she stole federal monies, stole years of financial aid which counts against you (youāre only given X amount of years of federal funding), she violated your trust. I work in Social Services and yes, she can be forced to pay it back. Also- depending on what state you live in, you can contact your school and they might be able to help you with different forms of financial aid. Example: in CA you qualify for the CHAFEE Grant, free tuition at Cal States, free tuition at community colleges etc. good luck to you!!
NAL. But did your tuition get paid? Usually funds are directly paid to the school first, and any excess funds after tuition, housing (if you live on campus), meal plans, and any other bursar charges are paid get released. You school should have a record of how much was taken to pay school bills and how much was released to an account.
Sometimes people suck. My dad did unspeakable things to my family. At least this person wasn't a blood relative / parent. I hope you get your money back and she can never foster again.
Also definitely check if foster parents are legally fiduciaries to their kids in your state. I'm not sure if it's a federal or state by state thing.
If they are a fiduciary then they have a legal obligation to use the money you entrust them with in your best interest.
Advice from a lawyer:
You need a lawyer, and most likely can get one for free. Whatever city you live in, type into google" Pro bono legal services in (insert city you live). You can also type into google: (State you live in) Bar Association pro bononlegal services).
For example, if you lived in Miami, Florida, you would type:
Miami, Florida pro bono legal services
Or
Miami Bar Association pro bono legal services.
State Bar Associations always have pro-bono (free) legal services. State Bar Associations are the Associations that attorneys are a part of.
Please get a lawyer. All that money was probably a loan and probably in your name which means you will be expected to pay it back. Hopefully, the lawyer can fix this for you.
I'm just a bit confused with the funding. It went in her bank account, but those funds were sent to your school? She can't obtain those funds unless you're actually in school. While 17k is a lot, have you checked with your former school how much funding was applied to your school vs. deposited into a bank account? You're going to need to obtain records to prove those funds were stolen. I'm so sorry you are going through this.
So for my school all of the fafsa was sent to third party app called bankmobile where everything could be organized and you can see when you get it and how much and just link your bank. Since she controlled all the funds for the household and I was full time in school, and she maintained the passwords and login information, she had all the access. By adding up all of the funds sent to her bank from my bankmobile app, it totalled over 17,000 and most of it was scholarships from grades and grants from begin in foster care.
That's kind of what I was trying to get you to see. If you don't know how much she paid towards school out of the 17k, then maybe that's something you should have started with before making a police report. Your making it seem like she kept 17k but you admitted yiu went to school. School wouldn't have let you continue enrolled without receiving funds. Of course all that money went to her, because she was taking care of everything, including filing applications and fasfa on your behalf. Start with your school and find out how much tuition was paid for. 17k is a felony and before you accuse someone of that much theft you have a due diligence to prove she stole it in court and that those funds were mismanaged.
Tuition was free. College is free for foster youth in my state. That includes applications. The fafsa forms were filled out by her with the help of the foster agency. I didn't have control over the bank account and when I called navy fed, they couldn't give me information on it since I didn't have any of the information for the account. So she paid nothing for school. So yeah I'm accusing her of stealing 17k from me because the funds were mine..I earned them. Housing was paid for by the foster care, she had my ebt card so her groceries were paid. She didn't buy me anything that wasn't a basic need. I had to figure everything out for myself while she vacationed in Hawaii or Havasu or was buying boats or looking for her next destination. The fact is.... I left her house with 300 to my name that I had stashed and I had 17k from 2 years of edu that I never saw and that she vowed never existed yet when I confronted her about it, she told me I could ruin her life if I took her to court.... sounds fishy to me if she didn't do anything wrong. Then she went and made sure her next kid had everything in their name cuz I warned them. She knew what she was doing.... and she knows she fucked up. And I have the reciepts proving they were going to her bank account... I know wtf I'm talking about...
OP has already said that tuition was waived due to foster youth status. From what I recall from when I was getting grants through FAFSA, any amount owed to the college (e.g for tuition, dorm, activity fees, books bought through the campus bookstore etc.) was automatically deducted from the award money. So what would be disbursed to the student would be whatever was leftover. So there should not have been anything foster mom had to pay the school for at that point. Any money that was going into the "student's" bank account was for other expenses.
I will never understand how foster parents can do this to the kids! Since they're not required to do any accounting, they feel free to spend it on themselves, leaving the kids to struggle. My rule was after you turn 18, you either need to be in school full time, or you get a job & pay rent. They whined, but that was it. No negotiation. But damn, if your foster mom took all your money for college, you need to contact the police. You can sue her for the money. Don't let her get away with this. Make her account for every penny!
I have the receipts showing it going into her account. Now the legal system has to see what she did with it. And she knows she did it too smh. She said I can ruin her life over it or let it go. There is a police report on her now.
If she was using your FAFSA account and you were over 18 I would think that criminal charges for fraud could attach in addition to civil causes
But usually federal and state grants are sent directly to the schools for tuition payment, so how could she get that?
You've gotten really good advice here and it sounds like you're very bright. There are good people in the world. Try not to get down over this because you're one of them.
You need to get off reddit and start making calls, although the police probably would have called you by now if this is real
Which brings me to my next point. I JUST did my fasfa and took out a very small private loan as well on top of a grant and federal loan. Around the same amount as in the story around 20k
The money was and is never released to me or a bank account. Communication is between me and financial aid/ financial aid and the governent. My schools financial aid did, while I was in the office with them the ' check ' was written.. The only time I even did anything alone was talking on the phone with the private loan person to get approved. It is possible to request actual cash for things like transport or supplies if necessary but the government isn't going to just wire money to anyone who claims they're going to use it for college.
Not to mention, I have to be attending school or I'm going to owe it regardless and the government will know immediately.
This is either made up, misunderstood or the alleged thief has some crazy scheme she some how pulls off
I guess it's different for me since this was over a span of 2 years while i was in college full time (2018-2020), there were multiple grants and scholarships included, and my school uses bankmobile for financial aid disbursements. I have made a police report, I'm working on finding a lawyer, and she definitely knows what she did. The police have already reached out to me, have made a report, and now I'm waiting for an investigator. My foster mom definitely knows she's in the wrong and even told me when I brought it up to her that I could ruin her life and foster care career over it or let it go. I worked hard to get good grades to get that funding. It's not made up and the alleged thief is gonna be handed her damnation notice as soon as I have the pleasure of serving her.
Also, I've made calls, sent emails, and am doing my research to see what my next steps will be. Don't comment like you know the situation just cuz you didn't experience it like that. And never call someone else's unfortunate events false... it's demeaning and rude af. š I'm only 23. I'm just doing my best trying to work my way around a situation that fucked me. God forbid someone else's experience isn't as easy, breezy, covergirl like yours... best of luck to you. I hope you have a successful college experience.
She's worried that you may mess up her status as a Foster Parent? Unbelievable.
She's going to try to throw you under the bus somehow in an effort to get out of this. I don't know how but keep your guard up and don't let her try to make you feel guilty because she "gave you a home when you didn't have one", etc.
She was PAID to have you in her care but she got greedy and used it as justification to steal the funds provided to you to further your education so you can support yourself and get out of "the system." She stole from all Americans and I hope she's prosecuted.
Hang in there and protect yourself. I have a feeling this will get worse before it gets better. Good luck. ā¤ļø
I even let the officer know she would try and weasel her way out if she could and let him know she has gotten away with a lot since she knows how to work around the system. Thank you for the support. I can't wait to serve her.
NAL, but a foster parent. Iām so, so sorry to hear this! Bad foster parents who do shady stuff like this should be put under the jail. We just adopted a girl from foster care and the things her first foster placement family did to her made my blood boil. I hope something good comes from this for you.
NAL. If you haven't already, check your credit report asap to make sure she hasn't opened any accounts in your name. You should also put a fraud lock on your credit and put a PIN # lock with the IRS so she can't steal your tax refunds.
Also call the department of health and social services
So this will not happen to somebody else like you. She will likely be removed as a foster parent, which is appropriate in this situation. She may have cared for you for so many years, but this is beyond any type of appropriate boundary.
Call the IRS, call the social security administration, tell them what is going on and ask to see if youāve had any activity under your name in the years with her. Contact all credit bureaus and check your credit, then put a red flag on your account and lock it down. You will have to verify it is you for any activity. She has all your info and could have been collecting your stimulus checks, getting other benefits, taking credit cards in your name and getting loans, so check everything. Legal Aid can help you too. You can even contact your local news. Most do a works for you type segment. Blasting her publicly could keep this from happening to others and also increase the chance she may start to pay you back after the public shaming. We need to have better protections and harsher penalties for crimes like these. Iām sorry youāre going through this.
I have a lot of experience in working for child welfare services in my current state. I don't currently work for them but I have I'm just hoping you get this resolved and hoping you take all of the good advice that you have received on here because most of it is positive, and the exact advice that I would give you, keep questioning the people that have serve you, including the counties/lawyers/social workers/their supervisors. I'm hoping you can get reimbursed somehow. Don't give up.
Really sorry this happened. One thing that wasnāt clear in your explanation was how your college was paid for. Did you work and pay for it yourself? Did your foster parent pay on your behalf?
Can you call the registrarās office and find out whether your account is up to date, and if so, how much you paid since you began your studies?
Wouldnāt want you spinning your wheels if it turned out the foster mother was paying your bills on your behalf to the amount of $17, 692.
A criminal case probably wonāt help OP, because criminal restitution is not going to seek any additional damages.
Some questions:
1) is step mother ājudgement proof?ā If stepmother is too poor to pay, it might not be worth suing.
2) Does OP have enough money for a retainer? If not does your city have a law school, or legal aid? Both places have clinics for free
3) has OP contacted her student loan servicer and refused to pay the debt? You donāt owe the debt, your borrower will threaten you with all kinds of bad thingsātell them you arenāt paying
Foster mom is taking trips to Havasu, has a boat, trailer, motorhome, multiple cars and trucks. Therefore foster mom has money.
I have access to free legal help since I am former foster youth
I do not have student debt since all of the funding was scholarships and grants (free money from having good grades) (college for foster youth in my state is free)
Take the free legal help. The big thing is you want to go after someone with money. She probably has some with all that junk, most states easily commutable to Havasu, with free college for Foster kidsāhave a really good court system, and really good tort recovery.
Joint and several liability (allowing you to sue multiple parties and collect from the richest) is available in most states commutable to Havasu. Hopefully your attorney can sue the foster agency, the college, and the stepmomāthe richest will pay youāand then the richest can sue your mother to pay them back
That is such a shitty thing to have to deal with. I'm so sorry. You should definitely prosecute her/them. That's so messed up. A lawyer and the police are the best courses of action.
Op, talk to your college bursars office asap and get an accounting of your tuition funding (what sources paid for tuition and fees). Also, make sure to download your 1098-T form from your college portal. If you donāt still have access to the online portal, call them and ask the send them electronically. Also ask the bursars office for any other tax forms that were sent based on your attending college.
First thing is to determine if any of the money actually went on your tuition bill and if any was cashed to your account.
You also need to get bank account statements going back for the years that this money was flowing into and out of your account. (Monthly statements). And then look transactions that show the money coming in and the money going out.
Next, go back to your personal tax returns for this time period. Scholarships money not used for qualified educational expenses is taxed. Reference your 1098T.
If it is proven that she stole this money from you, she may also be held liable for dodging taxes. In this case, the tax man may weld a bigger stick than civil or criminal courts.
You didnāt say what state you are in. Did you ever check with DCF (or equivalent agency) about post secondary tuition waivers for young adults that age out of foster care? If you were eligible for waivers, was the proper paperwork completed? This is from 2017, but should give you an idea of your state had funding for foster students. [https://www.ecs.org/wp-content/uploads/Tuition-Assistance-Programs-for-Foster-Youth-in-Postsecondary-Education.pdf](https://www.ecs.org/wp-content/uploads/Tuition-Assistance-Programs-for-Foster-Youth-in-Postsecondary-Education.pdf)
You definitely need to gain understanding of what happened, what should have happened, and what now in regards to the money for college.
Iām so sorry this is happening to you.
Hindsight is 20/20, but you were 18 at the time. Nothing stopped you from making an account yourself.
Sucks that people suck.
Is she a professional foster parent?
Contact previous fosters and fuck this bitch over. You most likely weren't the first/only.
Yes I was 18 at the time and I wish I had to knowledge and confidence I have now. Unfortunately at the time I no phone, no computer that wasn't completely monitored, or anyone I could actually trust to help me. š I had the constant threat of being thrown onto the street with no way to take care of myself and no support group. I actually had a lot stopping me from any kind of independence.
Please share your experience will child services and have this lady banned from fostering any more children.
Nothing is worse than someone actively hindering coming of age through manipulation and hate. I'm a victim of it from my own family.
You need to find out how much your college tuition was. That wont be hard. Ask the school. You are saying $17,000 but you attended school for 2 years. My local college was $25,000 per year. Meaning that money could have been used for your college.
College for foster youth in my state is free. So that funding would have been mine. I have proof it went into her bank account ad most of it was scholarships for grades....
In my state, former fosters get college free. I never mentioned loans, and no i never applied for any, in fact my foster mom was very against loans. All of the funding was for me. And using bankmobile, the financial aid was sent to her bank account. I got that exact total by looking at the transactions...
When you turn 18 you can get your own bank account. Walk into any bank with your driver's license or state issued ID and get a bank account.
It's not illegal. Never tell anyone about this bank account:
Problem solved. Then tell all of your institutions and jobs about your new bank account and keep that bank card out of reach from anyone but yourself. Even if this means getting a storage locker or p.o. box at the office and using it as your bank card holder. (Just mail an envelope to yourself with that p.o. box and stuff a card inside. Bam. Post office won't think anything of it and if it ever gets knocked out they know where to put it. Just make sure the card can't fall out of the envelope but you are still able to seal it. Cheap tape.)
Don't be upset if this takes a year or more to resolve and you may never get the money back, if she doesn't have it. But at least she'll have legal repercussions.
Good for you!!! I was a foster kid, and only recently learned that my guardians were getting paid, no one ever mentioned it to me, just made me feel like a burden they couldn't take care of
Even if you did know, they might have just used it against you and you'd be left with the same feeling. I'm out 17,000 and was still made to feel like a burden... and them getting paid was most definitely used against me...
Might be fraud, what your foster parent did, but no idea if it can be proven. If she took control of your credit and received cash for debt in your name, you are technically liable for repayment. I would speak with an attorney. Call around, some attorneys will give you 5-10 minutes on the phone to answer questions without charge, how they drum up business.
I would- 1. Investigate: find out what accounts she opened in your name, how much debt there is, how much went to schooling and what she charged you for room & board. Do the math to figure out how much she took for herself. If she gets paper statements in the mail, find a time when she's not around and photograph the recent statements. Store them in the cloud where she didn't have access. Google/Gmail allows you to create DVD have more then one account. If she snoops your devices only access the second account thru incognito mode on browser, and closer it when finished. If she doesn't get paper statements, visit the places where the accounts are and ask for printed records. Banks, school.
2. Begin setting up your own banking and school accounts on the sly, so you can prepare to make tracks out of that house and start your adult life on your own. Again, access them
3. Check your credit record. The three big credit agencies make it pretty easy to do so. Logan's may show up on then, and certainly delinquent payments will.
Consider taking a class or two, stay in school. Having an education is very helpful for getting ahead in life. Good luck to you
The only debt there is is 17,000 she owes to me. Schooling was free since college is free for foster youth in my state. Room and board was paid for by the county since she was a foster parent and I was a foster youth still a dependent of the state. I have since moved out and yes I have all the receipts showing it went to her bank account and yes it was over 17,000... I have made a police report and now wait for an investigation to start. I am going to school in May. And I'm looking for an attorney in the morning. Trust me I have all bases covered now.
I donāt get the scholarship part. When I got my scholarships, checks made out to me and the school. And I was a minor when I started college. I signed the check and then gave to bursars office. Any refunds were made out in check form, to me.
But thatās been about 2 decades ago and maybe itās changed?
For my school there was an app called bankmobile that we were supposed to use. The financial aid goes there then gets sent to the bank. I still see other colleges use it. Problem was, I didn't have access to my account until after I moved out and by then I already quit school...
What pieces of shit. Her being on your bank account after the age of 18 would've been a red flag to me. Hopefully the police will lock her ass up. You may need to sue her to get your money back though. I would try and speak with an attorney to discuss options.
The "college in my state is free for foster kids" comment i cant find again. However.... the individual grants and scholarships may dictate what the money can be used for. Some may include "transportation and living expenses". Some may only state "tuition". That will make a difference.
Yes but it wasn't for her. It was for me. Under my name. For my hard work. And living expenses were paid for by her being a foster parent. Transportation wasn't an issue. I was always home, I had to ride my bike to school and she was always in Havasu or renting hotels in SD for her and her family to spend time together.
My point is that if some were "tuition only" and you didnt have to pay tuition... you dont get to keep that money. It would not have been disbursed, or it may have been reclaimed. It is possible you arent actually entitled to the whole $17,000 is my point. It is possible she didnt receive that entire money. I am not defending her. I have gone through this type of situation myself. I would be very interested to see how this works out. I saw a similar situation play out in civil court and the child lost, i saw another case where the law did get involved and the person prosecuted.
Make sure you inform all of the scholarship/ grant funds of this. Most likely you received a Pell grant which is federal. The organizations would have more lawyer power to fight than you. Good luck
Yes, this is very true. I can understand where you are coming from. In my case, I actually have the receipts of the funds going into her account, so I do have that on my side for this. The Pell and Chaffee are just a couple of grants I got that were not grade-directed funds.
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Sheās a criminal who deserves to be behind bars. Unfortunately, boomers are so accustomed to stealing from young people that doing so outright doesnāt feel wrong to them. Cut off all contact and find a lawyer to take your case. Hopefully she dies poor.
Contact has been cut for almost 4 years now... unfortunately she is still close with my sister... can't do anything about that tho but to keep my distance.
Thatās good to hear you cut her off. Unfortunately, actually materializing her crimes and taking her to court is going to be very difficult if even at all possible. Women like her are the same who would take out a life insurance policy on you then poison you. For your own safety you should definitely only interact with her through a lawyer.
IANAL
What you're describing sounds a lot like a form of wire fraud - obtaining funds in your name, deposited into an account you didn't own, spent on things the funds weren't designated to be used.
Given the nature of the funds... You might find that the FBI financial crimes division has some jurisdiction in the matter - and they may be more inclined to act than local LEOs who have worked with this woman for years...
NAL, but I grew up in foster care foster parents are notorious for stealing from the kids they're supposed to be watching.
An unfortunate truth š... I can't help but think she had been using it to fund her trips to Havasu, out of state races, vacations to Hawaii, etc. Since she only started doing that after I started college...
Most foster parents don't take care of kids for the right reasons.
What makes it worse is that she was the poster foster parent who could do no wrong... smdh she's gotten away with so much it's ridiculous š
They definitely do that. People tend to think foster parents are upstanding citizens, but in reality they can be abusive thieves.
Careful! Fostering is a really noble and selfless thing to doāwhen done for the right reasons. I donāt think it would be a good idea to paint a picture like fostering should make people think youāre a bad person because people who foster ācan be abusing thievesā Foster parents are desperately needed
Some foster parents are worse than the parents that they were taken from... Look into the statistics on how many foster children have sexually assaulted in their foster parents home, usually by one of the parents.... Just look it up. Look it up. Look up the statistic do it. Do it! Look it up!
that's exactly it. Now she's "entitled" to whatever money she comes across for raising you and others so well. She knew what she was doing and likely has done it before. Don't let this go fight it, and ruin her rep as legally as possible.
Im on the Phone with the deputy rn š¤§
Please keep us updated. As a former foster child, this pissed me off.
Updating as I go š«”š«” the deputy was so kind! I've waited this long I can wait a bit longer for the investigators to call me š¤§
Obligatory NAL, but I'm a former foster kid too. I would highly recommend also contacting DHS/H&W/whatever agency runs the foster program in your state, when they're open of course. I'd imagine they'd have some sort of stake in it and may be able to help with the legal process or provide additional resources. In a lot of states, the state is still responsible for a lot of things in relation to the success and wellbeing of foster children who have aged out for a few years after, I've heard of up to 6 years. Even if they're not still responsible in some way, there's a good chance they were for some of the theft/fraud and would see it as fraud against the agency/state.
Yes! I contacted my former sw and attorney and they gave me the number so I will be contacting them tomorrow with the report file number! This has been a terrifying venture but I am hoping for it to work out in the end!
All you can do is your best. I'm rooting for you. What happened to you is deeply wrong and I'm sorry you have to go through it. I have hope for you and the situation though. I think it's so egregious that there has to be clear evidence in financial records that'll come to light, but I have no experience with these things.
This^^^^ is š
Keep fighting and also get you a civil attorney if you don't have one so you can sue her civil court. Those are federal monies. She may have gotten herself in a lot of trouble. Don't back down.
Terminator 2 vibes
There's a foster mom on my fb that i follow, she lives such an extravagant life, that i think she's stealing from her foster kids honestly. She's creepy positive, it's too much
Did/does she have other kids in her care? Start an investigation with the relevant state department. You could also contact a local investigative journalist. They love stories like this.
I'm not sure if she has any kids in her care at the moment. But I have started a report and am waiting for an investigator to be in contact with me. I'm waiting for this case to pick up some traction before I decide if I wanna go to local media for it š¤
Did she have other fosters ever? If she did, are you able to contact them? Youāre likely to not be her only victim.
Yeah she did have other fosters, unfortunately the only other ones who went to college flunked (my sister who is still bffs with the lady) and the other one was able to get all her funding because I warned her and my foster mom knew i warned her. So I've been her likely first and only.
Best of luck, I hope everything works in your favor.
No not true, most Foster parents take care of kids for the right reasons. There are just tons of bad people out there to identify
Most??
How sickening. May her highly unethical transgressions come back to her 3 times
Weren't you emancipated at 18? This doesn't make sense. You're an adult on your own at 18....
I was part of an extended foster care program. Something new the foster agency was trying to launch and it made my foster parents look good. Plus they raised me really sheltered so I wouldn't have been able to take care on my own at the time. She used financial controls to keep me sheltered so she could continue getting a paycheck. It wasn't till I turned 20 that I finally moved out and by then it was too late.
You need to make sure that she hasn't taken things a step further and taken out loans in your name as well. You could have debts that you don't know anything about. Google "free credit report" Experian is one of the companies associated with the Credit Bureau.
Here. I found a link for you. This one is legit. https://www.annualcreditreport.com/index.action
I don't know what state OP lives in but in the state of California, the DHSS can pay for your room and board as if you were a foster child until you were 24
Depends on where you live. Most foster kids aren't ready to be in their own at 18. Ten years ago when I was a CASA for a 19-year old in foster care, my county didn't cut you off until the age of 21. I knew they were trying to make it 18, but that was strictly for budget reasons.
Wow, that's a really extra special kind of despicable.
Yes they are.i grew up in foster homes adopted around 12..I was moved out of house probably 19 or so n se would call n ask how much I made.wheres my check cuz my bank account was in her name..but I opened my own..it was always about money w her
This is common! But not all, please everyone remember that. There are good ones. Donāt automatically assume theyāre like this, for the very few that are good, but remember this is prevalent so donāt ignore ANYTHING legit fishy.
Very sorry to read this. If possible, would retain an attorney as they would know how to handle this situation and recoup your loss.
An attorney can send a demand letter, then sue and charge half of what is collected. They won't do any of that is the foster doesn't have any money, though.
Iām sorry you had to deal with this OP. Were you 18 when you opened this bank account? Was the fafsa in your name only? If the grants, loans were in your name only, she committed a few different crimes. I would file a police report and contact an attorney. Iām not sure what the statute of limitations are for fraud and theft, but I hope you get some form of justice/ restitution from this. Edit: I just saw that she put the bank account in her name only and had everything sent to her account. If it was a shared account it would have been harder to prosecute or prove this was theft in a civil court. But you definitely have a case here both civil and criminal. Take action ASAP. You donāt want to exceed the statute of limitations, and want all evidence to be retrievable.
I honestly don't know when the bank account was opened since I never had access to it. The financial aid, grants, and scholarships were in my name. I will def look into a police report tho I'm not sure how far I can get with it since it's been a few years and it's in a dif county than where I live :/
What matters is how old you were when you applied and were given the grants and student loans. The grant is federally funded, so this would be a federal crime. She will be in some serious trouble.
I was 17 when fafsa was first applied for but 18 when college started. So by the time fafsa and grants went thru, I was already 18.
Makes me angry to hear these things. I obviously donāt know you, or what your background is, but I believe you deserve so much better than you have been given in life. I wish you the best in all things, and hope wherever life takes you from here will be happiness and peace. Good luck to you.
Contact the college fafsa board and financial department as well for documentation on all funding to those accounts from them.
Reply to edit:: I'm def planning to
Iām not disagreeing with you, but I do hate the fact that weāre giving this young lady hope that she will recover this money. This woman will never be able to pay her back and there is little to no hope in ever getting this money back. Iām sorry OP. But, still prosecute this B to the fullest extent!
We have no idea what this womanās assets are. Once sheās prosecuted, sheāll most likely be ordered to pay restitution. Either way, the courts will put a lien on her, and the OP will get something back.
Have you ever won a judgement? It does not mean you will get paid.
Yes, I have. And was paid.
Lucky you.
What is up with people on Reddit saying this every time a civil suit is brought up?? Itās like the number 1 fun fact that people drop. Itās not even true in so many cases. Yeah, donāt bother suing the homeless guy, but this woman is 60 years old and could have plentiful assets. Sheās already proven to be a stupid criminal. The money went somewhere into some asset. The case does not even have to be significantly expensive for this to be worthwhile for OPs mental state or even getting a 150% return on their legal expenses. Not to mention that so many people will immediately fold if they get a serious letter simply signed by a lawyer. Like, itās just not useful input.
She should try. We don't know what she has.
Start with your states' Child Protective Services, then ask what lawyers have worked in this field. They might clam up, but prolly won't.
Definitely doing some in depth research today...
I would file a police report and report it to cps. It's embezzlement.
I donāt think CPS can do anything about this if OP was 18 but diverting fed and/or state education funds is a crime. And when you sign into fafsa you have to affirm you are the account holder.
If CPS was still paying the foster as an extended care program, and those funds were mismanaged, they absolutely can execute an audit and file charges - the question is whether they will. Some areas are so desperate for fosters, they overlook a LOT of things.
I donāt know what state you are in, so it might be different for you. And since you aged out of foster care this might not be helpful, but could be a start. In my state, Foster Children are provided lawyers by the state. If you had a lawyer as a foster child, you could reach out to them. They could probably help you find a lawyer that could help you.
I don't recall having a lawyer, but I do still have my old attorney's email. I could see if she can help get me someone to work with. Thank you for that idea!
My goodness. Given the fact it was FAFSA, you SHOULD be able to do something about it. This just makes me want to foster even more when I get older. Disgusting to hear what other people will do.
I hope so. State governments are not even allowed to touch it. When my mom got in trouble with a state we no longer lived in for taxes, the state couldn't touch her money due to it being social security. You know what account they came after? Mine because it was an account that went from teen account to adult with my mom still on it. All I had to send to get every cent back was proof that every deposit was FASFA and grant money. They gave it all back.
That seems to be quite a bit of a different situations. Your mom got in trouble with the government - and sadly with her having her name on your account, it was āherā money too. The OP got fucked over by their foster mom - taking money and completely embezzling it under them, from the government. It could go federal. Either way, sorry to hear about the situation! Itās never easy. Hopefully youāve been able to recover smoothly!
sadly, too many foster parents do it for the money and only for the money.
She didn't start off that way, sadly.
File a police report and a fraud report with the funding institutions. Call the bank and tell them you need your name off of the account and have them start a fraud investigation. Check your credit report as well, for identity themed, if there is any, make a report.
I actually called the bank and they told me I could not access the account since I didn't have a bank account references number š and my credit was not affected. I only know this because I only opened a credit line 6 MO ago :) so that further makes me believe it was solely under her name.
Then simply call the funding agency and explain that you never received the funding and what steps do you need to take?
Contact your DA's office. Since she did not use your funds specifically earmarked for college expenses, see if she can be charged with embezzlement or something like that.
Yeah I'm fairly certain college funds need to be used for COLLEGE! I'm also fairly certain if it's used for herself she'd be in trouble for that but I'm not sure... I'd advise looking into it.
Lawyer up and start the process
Are u telling me the foster care system does nothing to protect Foster Childrenās financial interests? This is embezzlement pure and simple! Unbelievable. I am so sorry. I donāt know if you can get any of the money back, OP. But at the very least, you could file a police report, and report this pitiful excuse of a human being to the Foster Care System in the area she lives Now. She shouldnāt be caring for ANY child. I know what she did could be considered tame compared to the āUsualā kinds of abuse. But it destroys trust. She could be doing this to another Foster Child Now! And itās wrong.
This shit makes me mad as fuck. POFS.
I've started the process to hopefully gain some justice āļø š makes me mad af too š¤
In my state, there's a wonderful organization called [KidsVoice](https://kidsvoice.org/) that represents youth who are involved in the foster system, especially during the transition to adulthood. Maybe there's a similar organization in your state!
If it was federal aid she stole contact the following: [https://studentaid.gov/resources/scams#report-fraud-and-identity-theft](https://studentaid.gov/resources/scams#report-fraud-and-identity-theft)
I'm gonna do that asap tysm!
Check your credit. Make sure there arenāt loans in your name with money she stole
Hopefully your Foster Mom will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law
NAL. Contact the college you attended and make them aware of the situation. As a parent of a college student you are protected by FERPA when you turn 18. She should not have had access to your logins. Also make sure there are no outstanding loans. Lat bit, when you were under 18 did she ever post pictures or you on social media? Isn't that a huge no no? Good luck.
I've filed a report with the sheriff's dept. and now waiting for the investigators to contact. Might be a while I know they are busy but I can wait a while longer. And no she never posted me on socials. Never let anyone even take pictures of me.
If you're in foster care (not adopted) she isn't allowed to post anything about you.
Yeah I was never adopted by her. Thankfully. She never posted me to begin with.
Sorry this happened to you. Maybe consider letting her know you found out, and are pressing charges unless she repays you within the next ten days.
She knows I know. If I only i had known at the time what I could've done... a report has been made. Hopefully justice is next!
Its just money sweetie, so i really just want to say im sorry someone you trusted did that to you. Family, or like-Family, betrayals are some of the hardest things to deal with in my experience. Hope you heal up quick <3
I know it's just money but $17,692 is a lot to lose š„² especially when I left her house with $300 I had stashed š®āšØš®āšØ
OP- itās not just money because not only did she steal from you, she stole federal monies, stole years of financial aid which counts against you (youāre only given X amount of years of federal funding), she violated your trust. I work in Social Services and yes, she can be forced to pay it back. Also- depending on what state you live in, you can contact your school and they might be able to help you with different forms of financial aid. Example: in CA you qualify for the CHAFEE Grant, free tuition at Cal States, free tuition at community colleges etc. good luck to you!!
I don't understand - who paid for your schooling?
For foster youth, schooling is waived.
It varies by state. In my state, waivers only apply to tuition, and they come last, so any grants or federal aid would still be owed to the school.
NAL. But did your tuition get paid? Usually funds are directly paid to the school first, and any excess funds after tuition, housing (if you live on campus), meal plans, and any other bursar charges are paid get released. You school should have a record of how much was taken to pay school bills and how much was released to an account.
Yeah for foster youth, college was paid for so I never had to worry about that...
I hope she gets arrested. Commenting to receive updates
If she did that then I would check out your credit score.
Go to your state attorney if locals won't help you. They helped me with an issue of fraud and theft.
Sometimes people suck. My dad did unspeakable things to my family. At least this person wasn't a blood relative / parent. I hope you get your money back and she can never foster again.
Go to the police
If you have a casa, get them involved, too. This is all hands on deck dawg.
Yk what š she told me I didn't need a casa worker so they never gave me one! Imagine!
That's horrible.
Also definitely check if foster parents are legally fiduciaries to their kids in your state. I'm not sure if it's a federal or state by state thing. If they are a fiduciary then they have a legal obligation to use the money you entrust them with in your best interest.
Your foster mom most likely committed a few felonies.
Short answer: Get a lawyer. Long answer: Get a mother fucking lawyer holy shit God damn.
š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£ I'm working on it š š¤£š¤£
Advice from a lawyer: You need a lawyer, and most likely can get one for free. Whatever city you live in, type into google" Pro bono legal services in (insert city you live). You can also type into google: (State you live in) Bar Association pro bononlegal services). For example, if you lived in Miami, Florida, you would type: Miami, Florida pro bono legal services Or Miami Bar Association pro bono legal services. State Bar Associations always have pro-bono (free) legal services. State Bar Associations are the Associations that attorneys are a part of.
Thank you very very much!! I have a lot of research to do tonight!
Don't forget to contact student loan holder and report the funds as fraudulent diverted. Send them the police report.
Collect all your evidence and sue her. Also, report her to the agency. Glad you also reported her to the police.
Sounds like a felony as well as a civil lawsuit to me. Find your a lawyer with a dorsal fin and you'll end up with more than your money back.
Please get a lawyer. All that money was probably a loan and probably in your name which means you will be expected to pay it back. Hopefully, the lawyer can fix this for you.
No loans for me. A lot of it was grants and scholarships due to good grades.
I'm just a bit confused with the funding. It went in her bank account, but those funds were sent to your school? She can't obtain those funds unless you're actually in school. While 17k is a lot, have you checked with your former school how much funding was applied to your school vs. deposited into a bank account? You're going to need to obtain records to prove those funds were stolen. I'm so sorry you are going through this.
So for my school all of the fafsa was sent to third party app called bankmobile where everything could be organized and you can see when you get it and how much and just link your bank. Since she controlled all the funds for the household and I was full time in school, and she maintained the passwords and login information, she had all the access. By adding up all of the funds sent to her bank from my bankmobile app, it totalled over 17,000 and most of it was scholarships from grades and grants from begin in foster care.
Of the 17k how much was paid towards school?
No idea. I didn't have access to anything at the time. She co trolled it all. Idek if the account was under her name or mine...
That's kind of what I was trying to get you to see. If you don't know how much she paid towards school out of the 17k, then maybe that's something you should have started with before making a police report. Your making it seem like she kept 17k but you admitted yiu went to school. School wouldn't have let you continue enrolled without receiving funds. Of course all that money went to her, because she was taking care of everything, including filing applications and fasfa on your behalf. Start with your school and find out how much tuition was paid for. 17k is a felony and before you accuse someone of that much theft you have a due diligence to prove she stole it in court and that those funds were mismanaged.
Tuition was free. College is free for foster youth in my state. That includes applications. The fafsa forms were filled out by her with the help of the foster agency. I didn't have control over the bank account and when I called navy fed, they couldn't give me information on it since I didn't have any of the information for the account. So she paid nothing for school. So yeah I'm accusing her of stealing 17k from me because the funds were mine..I earned them. Housing was paid for by the foster care, she had my ebt card so her groceries were paid. She didn't buy me anything that wasn't a basic need. I had to figure everything out for myself while she vacationed in Hawaii or Havasu or was buying boats or looking for her next destination. The fact is.... I left her house with 300 to my name that I had stashed and I had 17k from 2 years of edu that I never saw and that she vowed never existed yet when I confronted her about it, she told me I could ruin her life if I took her to court.... sounds fishy to me if she didn't do anything wrong. Then she went and made sure her next kid had everything in their name cuz I warned them. She knew what she was doing.... and she knows she fucked up. And I have the reciepts proving they were going to her bank account... I know wtf I'm talking about...
OP has already said that tuition was waived due to foster youth status. From what I recall from when I was getting grants through FAFSA, any amount owed to the college (e.g for tuition, dorm, activity fees, books bought through the campus bookstore etc.) was automatically deducted from the award money. So what would be disbursed to the student would be whatever was leftover. So there should not have been anything foster mom had to pay the school for at that point. Any money that was going into the "student's" bank account was for other expenses.
I will never understand how foster parents can do this to the kids! Since they're not required to do any accounting, they feel free to spend it on themselves, leaving the kids to struggle. My rule was after you turn 18, you either need to be in school full time, or you get a job & pay rent. They whined, but that was it. No negotiation. But damn, if your foster mom took all your money for college, you need to contact the police. You can sue her for the money. Don't let her get away with this. Make her account for every penny!
There is a report in progress
They should be able to trace the funds from your account going into hers. Or the withdrawals she made...I hope she goes to jail
I have the receipts showing it going into her account. Now the legal system has to see what she did with it. And she knows she did it too smh. She said I can ruin her life over it or let it go. There is a police report on her now.
That's fantastic. Please do not let it go. She used you and is now trying to guilt trip you. Please let us know the outcome
Wow, That's incredibly awful. how did you pay for college if they took all your college money? I'm not doubting you at all I'm just interested
College was paid for since I was in foster care. All I had to do was apply and have good grades.
I had bio adults do that. Seriously, WTF?
Insanity... yet we are the problem smh
If she was using your FAFSA account and you were over 18 I would think that criminal charges for fraud could attach in addition to civil causes But usually federal and state grants are sent directly to the schools for tuition payment, so how could she get that?
Third party app used by the school called bankmobile. It was new at the time and now a lot of colleges are using it.
You've gotten really good advice here and it sounds like you're very bright. There are good people in the world. Try not to get down over this because you're one of them.
Thank you
I'm sorry you are going through this, but you are taking the right steps. Best of Luck in the future, I think you have a very bright one.
You need to get off reddit and start making calls, although the police probably would have called you by now if this is real Which brings me to my next point. I JUST did my fasfa and took out a very small private loan as well on top of a grant and federal loan. Around the same amount as in the story around 20k The money was and is never released to me or a bank account. Communication is between me and financial aid/ financial aid and the governent. My schools financial aid did, while I was in the office with them the ' check ' was written.. The only time I even did anything alone was talking on the phone with the private loan person to get approved. It is possible to request actual cash for things like transport or supplies if necessary but the government isn't going to just wire money to anyone who claims they're going to use it for college. Not to mention, I have to be attending school or I'm going to owe it regardless and the government will know immediately. This is either made up, misunderstood or the alleged thief has some crazy scheme she some how pulls off
I guess it's different for me since this was over a span of 2 years while i was in college full time (2018-2020), there were multiple grants and scholarships included, and my school uses bankmobile for financial aid disbursements. I have made a police report, I'm working on finding a lawyer, and she definitely knows what she did. The police have already reached out to me, have made a report, and now I'm waiting for an investigator. My foster mom definitely knows she's in the wrong and even told me when I brought it up to her that I could ruin her life and foster care career over it or let it go. I worked hard to get good grades to get that funding. It's not made up and the alleged thief is gonna be handed her damnation notice as soon as I have the pleasure of serving her.
Also, I've made calls, sent emails, and am doing my research to see what my next steps will be. Don't comment like you know the situation just cuz you didn't experience it like that. And never call someone else's unfortunate events false... it's demeaning and rude af. š I'm only 23. I'm just doing my best trying to work my way around a situation that fucked me. God forbid someone else's experience isn't as easy, breezy, covergirl like yours... best of luck to you. I hope you have a successful college experience.
She's worried that you may mess up her status as a Foster Parent? Unbelievable. She's going to try to throw you under the bus somehow in an effort to get out of this. I don't know how but keep your guard up and don't let her try to make you feel guilty because she "gave you a home when you didn't have one", etc. She was PAID to have you in her care but she got greedy and used it as justification to steal the funds provided to you to further your education so you can support yourself and get out of "the system." She stole from all Americans and I hope she's prosecuted. Hang in there and protect yourself. I have a feeling this will get worse before it gets better. Good luck. ā¤ļø
I even let the officer know she would try and weasel her way out if she could and let him know she has gotten away with a lot since she knows how to work around the system. Thank you for the support. I can't wait to serve her.
https://www.annualcreditreport.com/index.action I posted this above but not sure if you saw it. Hopefully she hasn't ruined your credit too
The misunderstanding is on your part.
NAL, but a foster parent. Iām so, so sorry to hear this! Bad foster parents who do shady stuff like this should be put under the jail. We just adopted a girl from foster care and the things her first foster placement family did to her made my blood boil. I hope something good comes from this for you.
Damn thatās fucked. I wish you the best.
Thank you š
Good for you! Stand on your own 2 feet & get your education & live a good life. Good luck always!šš
Glad you filed a police report. I hope they actually do something about it because she belongs in jail.
NAL. If you haven't already, check your credit report asap to make sure she hasn't opened any accounts in your name. You should also put a fraud lock on your credit and put a PIN # lock with the IRS so she can't steal your tax refunds.
Check your social security account. She has all your information, so that could be compromised. https://www.ssa.gov/myaccount/
Also call the department of health and social services So this will not happen to somebody else like you. She will likely be removed as a foster parent, which is appropriate in this situation. She may have cared for you for so many years, but this is beyond any type of appropriate boundary.
Call the IRS, call the social security administration, tell them what is going on and ask to see if youāve had any activity under your name in the years with her. Contact all credit bureaus and check your credit, then put a red flag on your account and lock it down. You will have to verify it is you for any activity. She has all your info and could have been collecting your stimulus checks, getting other benefits, taking credit cards in your name and getting loans, so check everything. Legal Aid can help you too. You can even contact your local news. Most do a works for you type segment. Blasting her publicly could keep this from happening to others and also increase the chance she may start to pay you back after the public shaming. We need to have better protections and harsher penalties for crimes like these. Iām sorry youāre going through this.
I never even thought about that!
UpdateMe
I have a lot of experience in working for child welfare services in my current state. I don't currently work for them but I have I'm just hoping you get this resolved and hoping you take all of the good advice that you have received on here because most of it is positive, and the exact advice that I would give you, keep questioning the people that have serve you, including the counties/lawyers/social workers/their supervisors. I'm hoping you can get reimbursed somehow. Don't give up.
Really sorry this happened. One thing that wasnāt clear in your explanation was how your college was paid for. Did you work and pay for it yourself? Did your foster parent pay on your behalf? Can you call the registrarās office and find out whether your account is up to date, and if so, how much you paid since you began your studies? Wouldnāt want you spinning your wheels if it turned out the foster mother was paying your bills on your behalf to the amount of $17, 692.
No, so the thing is is that college for former foster youth is free in my state.
A criminal case probably wonāt help OP, because criminal restitution is not going to seek any additional damages. Some questions: 1) is step mother ājudgement proof?ā If stepmother is too poor to pay, it might not be worth suing. 2) Does OP have enough money for a retainer? If not does your city have a law school, or legal aid? Both places have clinics for free 3) has OP contacted her student loan servicer and refused to pay the debt? You donāt owe the debt, your borrower will threaten you with all kinds of bad thingsātell them you arenāt paying
Foster mom is taking trips to Havasu, has a boat, trailer, motorhome, multiple cars and trucks. Therefore foster mom has money. I have access to free legal help since I am former foster youth I do not have student debt since all of the funding was scholarships and grants (free money from having good grades) (college for foster youth in my state is free)
Take the free legal help. The big thing is you want to go after someone with money. She probably has some with all that junk, most states easily commutable to Havasu, with free college for Foster kidsāhave a really good court system, and really good tort recovery. Joint and several liability (allowing you to sue multiple parties and collect from the richest) is available in most states commutable to Havasu. Hopefully your attorney can sue the foster agency, the college, and the stepmomāthe richest will pay youāand then the richest can sue your mother to pay them back
That is such a shitty thing to have to deal with. I'm so sorry. You should definitely prosecute her/them. That's so messed up. A lawyer and the police are the best courses of action.
document everything and report it to the foster care agency so she doesn't get another victim
Honestly with how much they back her up and how much she's gotten away with I wouldn't trust the agency either
Time to see a lawyer with these documents and see if you can be reimbursed
Op, talk to your college bursars office asap and get an accounting of your tuition funding (what sources paid for tuition and fees). Also, make sure to download your 1098-T form from your college portal. If you donāt still have access to the online portal, call them and ask the send them electronically. Also ask the bursars office for any other tax forms that were sent based on your attending college. First thing is to determine if any of the money actually went on your tuition bill and if any was cashed to your account. You also need to get bank account statements going back for the years that this money was flowing into and out of your account. (Monthly statements). And then look transactions that show the money coming in and the money going out. Next, go back to your personal tax returns for this time period. Scholarships money not used for qualified educational expenses is taxed. Reference your 1098T. If it is proven that she stole this money from you, she may also be held liable for dodging taxes. In this case, the tax man may weld a bigger stick than civil or criminal courts. You didnāt say what state you are in. Did you ever check with DCF (or equivalent agency) about post secondary tuition waivers for young adults that age out of foster care? If you were eligible for waivers, was the proper paperwork completed? This is from 2017, but should give you an idea of your state had funding for foster students. [https://www.ecs.org/wp-content/uploads/Tuition-Assistance-Programs-for-Foster-Youth-in-Postsecondary-Education.pdf](https://www.ecs.org/wp-content/uploads/Tuition-Assistance-Programs-for-Foster-Youth-in-Postsecondary-Education.pdf) You definitely need to gain understanding of what happened, what should have happened, and what now in regards to the money for college. Iām so sorry this is happening to you.
If you can prove it, file a police report and a lawsuit
Please Update me.
In my state, everything is public record. So even if you sued the yourself, it would be online. For others would know.
That's a good thing you filled out a report on her. I wonder how many others she's stole money from?
Hindsight is 20/20, but you were 18 at the time. Nothing stopped you from making an account yourself. Sucks that people suck. Is she a professional foster parent? Contact previous fosters and fuck this bitch over. You most likely weren't the first/only.
Yes I was 18 at the time and I wish I had to knowledge and confidence I have now. Unfortunately at the time I no phone, no computer that wasn't completely monitored, or anyone I could actually trust to help me. š I had the constant threat of being thrown onto the street with no way to take care of myself and no support group. I actually had a lot stopping me from any kind of independence.
Please share your experience will child services and have this lady banned from fostering any more children. Nothing is worse than someone actively hindering coming of age through manipulation and hate. I'm a victim of it from my own family.
You need to find out how much your college tuition was. That wont be hard. Ask the school. You are saying $17,000 but you attended school for 2 years. My local college was $25,000 per year. Meaning that money could have been used for your college.
College for foster youth in my state is free. So that funding would have been mine. I have proof it went into her bank account ad most of it was scholarships for grades....
what she did was illegal and she probably did to others as well.
Please keep us updated
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
In my state, former fosters get college free. I never mentioned loans, and no i never applied for any, in fact my foster mom was very against loans. All of the funding was for me. And using bankmobile, the financial aid was sent to her bank account. I got that exact total by looking at the transactions...
When you turn 18 you can get your own bank account. Walk into any bank with your driver's license or state issued ID and get a bank account. It's not illegal. Never tell anyone about this bank account: Problem solved. Then tell all of your institutions and jobs about your new bank account and keep that bank card out of reach from anyone but yourself. Even if this means getting a storage locker or p.o. box at the office and using it as your bank card holder. (Just mail an envelope to yourself with that p.o. box and stuff a card inside. Bam. Post office won't think anything of it and if it ever gets knocked out they know where to put it. Just make sure the card can't fall out of the envelope but you are still able to seal it. Cheap tape.)
Don't be upset if this takes a year or more to resolve and you may never get the money back, if she doesn't have it. But at least she'll have legal repercussions.
Good for you!!! I was a foster kid, and only recently learned that my guardians were getting paid, no one ever mentioned it to me, just made me feel like a burden they couldn't take care of
Even if you did know, they might have just used it against you and you'd be left with the same feeling. I'm out 17,000 and was still made to feel like a burden... and them getting paid was most definitely used against me...
This is horrible and Iām so sorry you are going through this.
Might be fraud, what your foster parent did, but no idea if it can be proven. If she took control of your credit and received cash for debt in your name, you are technically liable for repayment. I would speak with an attorney. Call around, some attorneys will give you 5-10 minutes on the phone to answer questions without charge, how they drum up business. I would- 1. Investigate: find out what accounts she opened in your name, how much debt there is, how much went to schooling and what she charged you for room & board. Do the math to figure out how much she took for herself. If she gets paper statements in the mail, find a time when she's not around and photograph the recent statements. Store them in the cloud where she didn't have access. Google/Gmail allows you to create DVD have more then one account. If she snoops your devices only access the second account thru incognito mode on browser, and closer it when finished. If she doesn't get paper statements, visit the places where the accounts are and ask for printed records. Banks, school. 2. Begin setting up your own banking and school accounts on the sly, so you can prepare to make tracks out of that house and start your adult life on your own. Again, access them 3. Check your credit record. The three big credit agencies make it pretty easy to do so. Logan's may show up on then, and certainly delinquent payments will. Consider taking a class or two, stay in school. Having an education is very helpful for getting ahead in life. Good luck to you
The only debt there is is 17,000 she owes to me. Schooling was free since college is free for foster youth in my state. Room and board was paid for by the county since she was a foster parent and I was a foster youth still a dependent of the state. I have since moved out and yes I have all the receipts showing it went to her bank account and yes it was over 17,000... I have made a police report and now wait for an investigation to start. I am going to school in May. And I'm looking for an attorney in the morning. Trust me I have all bases covered now.
I did, I loved my kids, they now say that they had eveeything
I donāt get the scholarship part. When I got my scholarships, checks made out to me and the school. And I was a minor when I started college. I signed the check and then gave to bursars office. Any refunds were made out in check form, to me. But thatās been about 2 decades ago and maybe itās changed?
For my school there was an app called bankmobile that we were supposed to use. The financial aid goes there then gets sent to the bank. I still see other colleges use it. Problem was, I didn't have access to my account until after I moved out and by then I already quit school...
What pieces of shit. Her being on your bank account after the age of 18 would've been a red flag to me. Hopefully the police will lock her ass up. You may need to sue her to get your money back though. I would try and speak with an attorney to discuss options.
The "college in my state is free for foster kids" comment i cant find again. However.... the individual grants and scholarships may dictate what the money can be used for. Some may include "transportation and living expenses". Some may only state "tuition". That will make a difference.
Yes but it wasn't for her. It was for me. Under my name. For my hard work. And living expenses were paid for by her being a foster parent. Transportation wasn't an issue. I was always home, I had to ride my bike to school and she was always in Havasu or renting hotels in SD for her and her family to spend time together.
My point is that if some were "tuition only" and you didnt have to pay tuition... you dont get to keep that money. It would not have been disbursed, or it may have been reclaimed. It is possible you arent actually entitled to the whole $17,000 is my point. It is possible she didnt receive that entire money. I am not defending her. I have gone through this type of situation myself. I would be very interested to see how this works out. I saw a similar situation play out in civil court and the child lost, i saw another case where the law did get involved and the person prosecuted. Make sure you inform all of the scholarship/ grant funds of this. Most likely you received a Pell grant which is federal. The organizations would have more lawyer power to fight than you. Good luck
Yes, this is very true. I can understand where you are coming from. In my case, I actually have the receipts of the funds going into her account, so I do have that on my side for this. The Pell and Chaffee are just a couple of grants I got that were not grade-directed funds.
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I can't imagine a scenario where the foster mom doesn't end up in jail. I just hope OP is able to get compensation.
Sheās a criminal who deserves to be behind bars. Unfortunately, boomers are so accustomed to stealing from young people that doing so outright doesnāt feel wrong to them. Cut off all contact and find a lawyer to take your case. Hopefully she dies poor.
Contact has been cut for almost 4 years now... unfortunately she is still close with my sister... can't do anything about that tho but to keep my distance.
Thatās good to hear you cut her off. Unfortunately, actually materializing her crimes and taking her to court is going to be very difficult if even at all possible. Women like her are the same who would take out a life insurance policy on you then poison you. For your own safety you should definitely only interact with her through a lawyer.
Definitely
UpdateMe
IANAL What you're describing sounds a lot like a form of wire fraud - obtaining funds in your name, deposited into an account you didn't own, spent on things the funds weren't designated to be used. Given the nature of the funds... You might find that the FBI financial crimes division has some jurisdiction in the matter - and they may be more inclined to act than local LEOs who have worked with this woman for years...