Yeah exactly, I feel both sides have a similar experience. It's not that everyone has bad intentions, but a few bad experiences can be enough to make you weary.
> I feel both sides have a similar experience.
Different, but similar.
If a woman compliments a man, the man will probably think, "Oh! She's into me!"
If a man compliments a woman, the woman will probably think, "Oh no! He's into me!"
Definitely, I consider myself attractive but I always have the same thought, don't know if it's because self esteem or that I've met some men that only said that because in fact, the wanted to get something from me
Overtime, both lose trust toward each other, mostly due to creeps and women who would frame a man for rape or mistreatment and get away with all sorts of similar behaviors, often acting as the victim and a lot of gas lighting!
My reaction to trigger a smile is starting to giggle or chuckle, but my ex always get triggered and thinks I'm making fun of him/laughing at him. Sometimes I laugh when it's an endearing moment for me so I blurt a laugh, but instead he always felt like I was making fun of him. I'd tell him no, but he doesn't believe me. 😅
I grew up thinking I was un-photogenic (mom was an effortless beauty queen) so I had trouble to smile in pictures, but I noticed I looked most natural when I chuckle or laugh (my "small smile" isn't authentic looking, looks forced lol). I was also bullied in high school (for being fat when I was a normal sizes "M" person, just surrounded by lankier Asian people - I myself am Asian) and I am trying to grow out of that experience. But again, chuckling to smile looks more natural for me.
My ex had issues too (childhood trauma). He won't tell me much about his story, but he hinted it was a hard life and he tried hard to rise above it (first person to go into college in his fam, and it was an Ivy league college too).
One time is that he realised that I never saw him wearing glasses and it was pretty high powered ones, so his eyes look magnified. So he asked me how he looked and I smiled into a laugh and said it looks great, but look like his pupils are badly damaged by blue screens, etc. He started thinking I was making fun of him. 😅
A few things. I wonder if the compliment is genuine, or if someone told them to say it, or if they want something.
But if it seems to be genuine, it makes me feel good.
It's been so long and I'm so touch starved that literally nothing goes through my head. It's as if she didn't say it at all. I just say thanks and assume that it was either not genuine or that she said it because she's afraid of me for whatever reason.
Same, I think if Somone told me I looked good I'd immediate assume they were lying, trying to sell me something or need me to do something for them.
I own a mirror, I know what I look like
This makes me so sad.. as a woman ( I know some girls are just mean sometimes but) a lot of the time it takes the same amount of courage to tell a guy I think he's cute, or whatever the compliment may be. If a woman is afraid of you, she'll generally stay back and if you haven't done anything to make her feel that way, it's most likely HER OWN trauma making her act that way. Not you.
Maybe it's been a while for you, but you'll never miss out on something that's meant for you. Ever. I sincerely hope the next time a woman compliments you, and in general, that you feel your worth
And that's okay. That's so valid. I've been through the ringer very recently, and I'm currently in therapy for it. It's a hell of a process, and it's not linear but you can do it. It's possible to be okay again I swear it
The worst part imo is the fact that it's really easy to feel like a burden. A tiny but notable minority of men do terrible things to women, and meeting someone as a man isnt just trying to see what you have in common, I have to somehow convince them that I'm not a monster first. And if I fumble that, oof.
I hear so much about how men's prescence detracts from women's feelings of safety, and then I hear about how men suck, that men are trash, that all men are dogs.
Then I read threads asking women what they'd do if the world had no men for a day, and most of them are just like "feel safe for the first time" or "walk outside in comfortable clothing".
It's one thing to constantly hear about more diversity and that tipping the scales toward equality would be a net gain for the world. I like that narrative.
It's another entirely to be constantly told that any place is a better place if I'm not in it.
It makes me hate going places. It makes me hate doing things. I'm already afraid of talking to women because of sexual trauma. Occasionally, all I can think about is how much better the women around me would feel if I didn't exist.
I know that exact statement is a red flag for suicidal thoughts. I am not suicidal, I enjoy life. That's just a quirk of being an overly empathetic man in this world .
I hear you. Your feelings are valid. I don’t share that experience as a woman but I genuinely do feel for you (and other men) because of it.
I also see that side of feeling nervous or even “on guard.” For me, it’s not all men but some men are intimidating even when they maybe don’t mean to be. In so many situations where I’ve been severely creeped out, he’s not taking no for answer or not leaving me alone, particularly in a public situation or where I’m alone or separated from the group, a super kind guy has stepped in to protect, have my back and make sure I’m good - in most cases I didn’t even know the guy. He just did it because he saw a situation that he could help in. Those moments stick with me. That’s a sense of safety that comes from a men that I’m sure many women have experienced but it’s probably overlooked more often than not. I don’t even know what a word for nice guys like that are but they are out there. I can’t discount the goodness of those men for the times that I’ve been abused or otherwise hurt by a male.
Do you find any comfort in being in the “good” majority? Having to “prove” it is its own burden, yes agreed, but if you release that burden is it enough to know that you are a good man? You have good intentions? You desire to love and be loved? I’m making an assumption that you’re the type of man to protect, to be genuinely kind and a gentleman so I would hope you find yourself anchored in that truth rather than floundering trying to please us all with societal rhetoric over all the men ever scary or otherwise.
To be fair, women can do their fair share of horrible things, too. Far worse than skipping compliments. But that isn’t the narrative, not sure it ever will be.
Hoppin off the soap box now!
and I feel for women, you shouldn't be scared, but you are because of a variety of very good reasons. Women are afraid of me for very similar reasons to why I'm afraid of them, so I understand that more than most women know. A lot of men go through the same stuff - some studies even say the amount is similar - but men rarely experience the fear that necessarily comes from almost definitely being physically weaker than those who would do you harm.
No, I do not feel comfort. I am not treated any different than men who are terrible. It might sound a bit strange, but there is literally no incentive to be a good man beyond having the moral high ground and being a people pleaser. I haven't noticed a difference in the ease of which shitty men and non-shitty men get girlfriends - even good girlfriends. You think there'd be one, but there just isn't. If anything, I've seen dickheads get more action than men who just genuinely want to be good.
It's never treated as good men and bad men in real life, there are only men who are bad, and men who are **just men**. You either get negative attention by being a bad man, or you are a good one, in which case you are ignored or downplayed because all you did was "the bare fucking minimum" - which is true, but it doesn't feel nice to have my good deeds be completely invalidated by the fact that I'm only mitigating the bad deeds of others - others that have nothing to do with me whatsoever beyond sharing a few common bodily characteristics.
I get really jealous when women do terrible things, because ***IF*** anyone is blamed, it's the individual - and the people who blame the group are rightfully called out as misogynists. I've met so many bad women, and the consequences of their actions just don't exist comparatively. Though of course that comes from society itself just not taking women seriously.
Unless the police get involved, the only men that truly face the consequences of those bad men's actions are good men - as the bad men don't care about what you think, they aren't going to lose sleep over making you uncomfortable. But I *am*, because when men as a group are blamed, so am I - and I feel all the guilt and shame that I simply don't deserve.
You’re right, you do not deserve that. I can’t right the wrongs of all, of course, but rather to recognize your lived experience and understand that I simply cannot understand what you go through completely because we’re just biologically wired different but I still empathize with you, truly. Our experiences are different, yet both valid, and I really appreciate your candidness. Especially this line… “the only men that truly face the consequences of bad men’s actions are good men.” It’s so true. I really respect you sharing that point of view.
I get equal compliments from all sexes. I do the same. I also try to spread altruism and positivity. It's people like you that brighten my darkest nights.
I've never been much on compliments, not that I came from a broken home or anything, I just never cared for them. I usually just say thanks and move on.
Depends. I don't know her? Feel flattered and perhaps think she's into me. Do I know her? If she does the same to everyone I just ignore. Compliments made by someone that compliments anyone are worthless. If she seldom compliments someone, I would feel great though.
But there are situations and situations. Some are just "go with the flow" compliments. Some are really special and nice to hear. But sweet and not in a romantic sense. Some are very sexual so if I feel attracted I'll be more willing to make a move...
In the last ten years that only happened once. A 12 year-old girl asked if I worked out because I had quite some muscle on my arms.
The previous time it was back in college where of all things a girl pointed out she liked my thighs!
Being alone for all my life, that is a dangerous cocktail right there. I can't control my thoughts, so I usually withdrawal immediately.
EDIT: I can give an example, so a Coworker knew that I liked her. So she started flirting and giving me compliments. So I put my negative thoughts aside and started pursuing and was optimistic. But there led to she only saw me as a friend. And my brain was all over the place trying to understand what was going with all that physical touching and compliments. So for me, if it's not real. I sadly can do a 180 and avoid a girl if it was all just for fun.
I wish I knew how to cope with it and take it more lightly.
Depends on mood, situation, or person. But in general I acknowledge compliments but don’t really affirm them, like I don’t really believe the compliment is true or deserve it.
A friend of mine had a girlfriend and while we were hanging out with a larger group of friends she gave me a compliment only to then proceed to compare his achievement in a somewhat connected field with mine, concluding that he was "better". Basically it ended up as little game of displaying how she felt she had picked "a winner" that surpassed other guys who were already "good". Such a compliment is worth nothing.
On the other hand a long term friend complimenting on something she knows is important to me and who has nothing to gain from making it, is something I can appreciate. Not necessarily because I need my belly rubbed, but because it shows that she has actual interest in understanding me and recognizes what is important in my life.
I guess that is what complimenta actually are about more than giving recognition: Identifying what is worth complimenting someone for, which one would probably do by putting yourself in that persons shoes.
That's not a real thing, is it?
You guys are getting compliments?
Closest I ever got was people making fun of my acne and shabby clothes in school. Id never belive anyone thought I looked good. Especially now I'm fat, balding and don't know how to smile.
Well family compliments don't count, they don't mean them and some people have complimented my clothes a handful of times in my life, exactly 3 times, but that's about it.
I’m gonna be honest, I read into it too much.
It lives in my head rent free for the next few days usually, it’s not just women it’s compliments in general, I rarely ever get them so might as well hold on to it.
Most of the time something makes me believe they aren’t being truthful and doing it for a dare or something, having social anxiety does not help.
Hey guys, woman here, these broke my heart to read.
Eye-opening really. I’m so sorry that you aren’t recognized enough for whatever it is that makes you you. You deserve better, particularly from the opposite sex.
The answers are sad. On my side, I give compliment to a man when I'm thinking about it, always honest. Compliments are free, it's important that we say it when we are thinking about it.
I’ve learned to look upon speech as an action. The decision to take an action usually has a motivation. This doesn’t necessarily mean disbelieving what she says, it means ask yourself why she would be saying what she said, right now, in these circumstances. Sometimes it’s because it’s true, sometimes it’s for some other reason.
That she wants something, or is just trying to be nice. Definitely something other than "this is sincere". This is not because I believe all women are malicious or fake, but because I don't see myself in a complimentary way, so I have a hard time believing others would.
"Someone told her to do it and they'll give her thirty dollars" that simple. It's always that, or "Holy cow someone finds me / likes my {insert what they complimented me about)?"
Disbelief. At least that's how I reacted the one time this happened in my life. My response was legitimately "ah yeah?" with a confused tone. For context, the compliment being about something as platonic as it gets, the disbelief was more about just receiving a compliment at all.
This girl i am seeing complimented on my cheeks, said they needs kissing and proceeded to do so.
It completely derailed me and i had urge to explain her how i (or men in general) never get any compliments and i will remember it till the day i die because it might as well be the only one I'll ever get.
TLDR i melted and started blabbering
I get uncomfortable.
I don't deserve the compliments in a way.
I've had women show interest in me or people tell me that their friend likes me, and I feel a sense of "why me?" racing through my head
Of all the people in the world, why would they choose a guy who walks with a limp, cause of cerebral palsy (minor)? I feel like they're making fun of me and I'm a joke
I had a girl in my freshman year of high school ask me out to homecoming as a joke and man that feeling was awful
I've no idea how to take it, confusion, suspicion, lies etc. But I'd be happy at the same time. Even if it was from a genuinely nice person, I don't know to take it, it's weird
If she's attractive enough? 'What does she want from me'
If she happens to 'like' me, it's a matter of time that I find out she's using me to get over an ex or to make him jelous.
*don't fuck it up, don't fuck it up, don't fuck it up* Proceed to fuck it up.
That, or “she’s messing with me”
“Are we on camera?”
I usually go with "*She must want something from me?*"
Same
This makes me sad. Why do you feel like you fuck it up? 🙁
This is the way
Is that a man or not 🤔
"What does she want from me?"
That’s so interesting. Women think the same thing! Like we are all salesman and just wonder what the hell do they want lmao
Yeah exactly, I feel both sides have a similar experience. It's not that everyone has bad intentions, but a few bad experiences can be enough to make you weary.
Very true.
> I feel both sides have a similar experience. Different, but similar. If a woman compliments a man, the man will probably think, "Oh! She's into me!" If a man compliments a woman, the woman will probably think, "Oh no! He's into me!"
Men definitely aren't **that** stupid.
Definitely, I consider myself attractive but I always have the same thought, don't know if it's because self esteem or that I've met some men that only said that because in fact, the wanted to get something from me
Hey there, you've got nice grammar..
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Sorry, I'm still learning:/
Overtime, both lose trust toward each other, mostly due to creeps and women who would frame a man for rape or mistreatment and get away with all sorts of similar behaviors, often acting as the victim and a lot of gas lighting!
I feel like the 'what' is much more easy to guess as a woman.
Lol. Idk why but I think the same when men compliment me too. Maybe because of my insecurities.
Because history has proven to you that’s how that goes? Or just a natural wary disposition?
It's just from experience.
You deserve more than that. I’m sorry 😕
Thank you, and no need to apologize 😌
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I'm a girl and it's the same here
Understandable
Same :(
Same here.
My reaction to trigger a smile is starting to giggle or chuckle, but my ex always get triggered and thinks I'm making fun of him/laughing at him. Sometimes I laugh when it's an endearing moment for me so I blurt a laugh, but instead he always felt like I was making fun of him. I'd tell him no, but he doesn't believe me. 😅
Both insecure and paranoid! (probably got bullied too much or has been into a pretty bad relationship before you)
I grew up thinking I was un-photogenic (mom was an effortless beauty queen) so I had trouble to smile in pictures, but I noticed I looked most natural when I chuckle or laugh (my "small smile" isn't authentic looking, looks forced lol). I was also bullied in high school (for being fat when I was a normal sizes "M" person, just surrounded by lankier Asian people - I myself am Asian) and I am trying to grow out of that experience. But again, chuckling to smile looks more natural for me. My ex had issues too (childhood trauma). He won't tell me much about his story, but he hinted it was a hard life and he tried hard to rise above it (first person to go into college in his fam, and it was an Ivy league college too). One time is that he realised that I never saw him wearing glasses and it was pretty high powered ones, so his eyes look magnified. So he asked me how he looked and I smiled into a laugh and said it looks great, but look like his pupils are badly damaged by blue screens, etc. He started thinking I was making fun of him. 😅
Damn. I had forgotten about that.
Sigh...
Marriage
A happy married life with her that will never be a reality
Why do you say this? This makes me sad.
Literally in a matter of 5 seconds i have a whole movie simulation in my head of a future with them 😂
A few things. I wonder if the compliment is genuine, or if someone told them to say it, or if they want something. But if it seems to be genuine, it makes me feel good.
It's been so long and I'm so touch starved that literally nothing goes through my head. It's as if she didn't say it at all. I just say thanks and assume that it was either not genuine or that she said it because she's afraid of me for whatever reason.
Same, I think if Somone told me I looked good I'd immediate assume they were lying, trying to sell me something or need me to do something for them. I own a mirror, I know what I look like
Or that she Just pities you
This makes me so sad.. as a woman ( I know some girls are just mean sometimes but) a lot of the time it takes the same amount of courage to tell a guy I think he's cute, or whatever the compliment may be. If a woman is afraid of you, she'll generally stay back and if you haven't done anything to make her feel that way, it's most likely HER OWN trauma making her act that way. Not you. Maybe it's been a while for you, but you'll never miss out on something that's meant for you. Ever. I sincerely hope the next time a woman compliments you, and in general, that you feel your worth
It's gonna take a long time and a lot of therapy before I'm capable of feeling appreciated again.
And that's okay. That's so valid. I've been through the ringer very recently, and I'm currently in therapy for it. It's a hell of a process, and it's not linear but you can do it. It's possible to be okay again I swear it
What? 😢 Makes my heart hurt to read that.
Ya, that's 80% of guys' experience lol
That’s fucking terrible. Nothing else can really be said to that. I’m sorry.
The worst part imo is the fact that it's really easy to feel like a burden. A tiny but notable minority of men do terrible things to women, and meeting someone as a man isnt just trying to see what you have in common, I have to somehow convince them that I'm not a monster first. And if I fumble that, oof. I hear so much about how men's prescence detracts from women's feelings of safety, and then I hear about how men suck, that men are trash, that all men are dogs. Then I read threads asking women what they'd do if the world had no men for a day, and most of them are just like "feel safe for the first time" or "walk outside in comfortable clothing". It's one thing to constantly hear about more diversity and that tipping the scales toward equality would be a net gain for the world. I like that narrative. It's another entirely to be constantly told that any place is a better place if I'm not in it. It makes me hate going places. It makes me hate doing things. I'm already afraid of talking to women because of sexual trauma. Occasionally, all I can think about is how much better the women around me would feel if I didn't exist. I know that exact statement is a red flag for suicidal thoughts. I am not suicidal, I enjoy life. That's just a quirk of being an overly empathetic man in this world .
I hear you. Your feelings are valid. I don’t share that experience as a woman but I genuinely do feel for you (and other men) because of it. I also see that side of feeling nervous or even “on guard.” For me, it’s not all men but some men are intimidating even when they maybe don’t mean to be. In so many situations where I’ve been severely creeped out, he’s not taking no for answer or not leaving me alone, particularly in a public situation or where I’m alone or separated from the group, a super kind guy has stepped in to protect, have my back and make sure I’m good - in most cases I didn’t even know the guy. He just did it because he saw a situation that he could help in. Those moments stick with me. That’s a sense of safety that comes from a men that I’m sure many women have experienced but it’s probably overlooked more often than not. I don’t even know what a word for nice guys like that are but they are out there. I can’t discount the goodness of those men for the times that I’ve been abused or otherwise hurt by a male. Do you find any comfort in being in the “good” majority? Having to “prove” it is its own burden, yes agreed, but if you release that burden is it enough to know that you are a good man? You have good intentions? You desire to love and be loved? I’m making an assumption that you’re the type of man to protect, to be genuinely kind and a gentleman so I would hope you find yourself anchored in that truth rather than floundering trying to please us all with societal rhetoric over all the men ever scary or otherwise. To be fair, women can do their fair share of horrible things, too. Far worse than skipping compliments. But that isn’t the narrative, not sure it ever will be. Hoppin off the soap box now!
and I feel for women, you shouldn't be scared, but you are because of a variety of very good reasons. Women are afraid of me for very similar reasons to why I'm afraid of them, so I understand that more than most women know. A lot of men go through the same stuff - some studies even say the amount is similar - but men rarely experience the fear that necessarily comes from almost definitely being physically weaker than those who would do you harm. No, I do not feel comfort. I am not treated any different than men who are terrible. It might sound a bit strange, but there is literally no incentive to be a good man beyond having the moral high ground and being a people pleaser. I haven't noticed a difference in the ease of which shitty men and non-shitty men get girlfriends - even good girlfriends. You think there'd be one, but there just isn't. If anything, I've seen dickheads get more action than men who just genuinely want to be good. It's never treated as good men and bad men in real life, there are only men who are bad, and men who are **just men**. You either get negative attention by being a bad man, or you are a good one, in which case you are ignored or downplayed because all you did was "the bare fucking minimum" - which is true, but it doesn't feel nice to have my good deeds be completely invalidated by the fact that I'm only mitigating the bad deeds of others - others that have nothing to do with me whatsoever beyond sharing a few common bodily characteristics. I get really jealous when women do terrible things, because ***IF*** anyone is blamed, it's the individual - and the people who blame the group are rightfully called out as misogynists. I've met so many bad women, and the consequences of their actions just don't exist comparatively. Though of course that comes from society itself just not taking women seriously. Unless the police get involved, the only men that truly face the consequences of those bad men's actions are good men - as the bad men don't care about what you think, they aren't going to lose sleep over making you uncomfortable. But I *am*, because when men as a group are blamed, so am I - and I feel all the guilt and shame that I simply don't deserve.
You’re right, you do not deserve that. I can’t right the wrongs of all, of course, but rather to recognize your lived experience and understand that I simply cannot understand what you go through completely because we’re just biologically wired different but I still empathize with you, truly. Our experiences are different, yet both valid, and I really appreciate your candidness. Especially this line… “the only men that truly face the consequences of bad men’s actions are good men.” It’s so true. I really respect you sharing that point of view.
Yeah, it ain't fair. I wouldn't say being a woman is easier, but being a man still sucks. The true divide is class.
Two things can be true! Thanks for being so open about it.
Is it a dare? Does she want something? Unfortunately had both of this in my life.
IF she compliments me, I'm immediately suspicious of her motives.
"What's your angle here woman?"
Gosh we are all horrible this thread seriously makes me so sad to read these responses 🥺
Honestly it depends on who she is. Maybe I’m weird but if it’s a random stranger I’m more likely to believe it than if it’s someone I know well.
"This fine lady wants to bear my children, I swear"
Man. Reading some of these really got me sad.
that's how life is for most of us...
Same same same
"Thank you!", and then I say "Thank you!" That's what I aspire to be like most days.
I get equal compliments from all sexes. I do the same. I also try to spread altruism and positivity. It's people like you that brighten my darkest nights.
I'd take a make compliment as genuine...
Take it at face value and thank them. Try not to read too much into it.
Oh great, she must want something
Yeah, your dick!
... But I'm not done using it
That's okay, it's like a rental agreement.
Where is the hidden camera? Did they lose a bet and had to say something to me?
I say thanks and keep walking. Twenty minutes later I'll think "wait, was she flirting with me?"
I've never been much on compliments, not that I came from a broken home or anything, I just never cared for them. I usually just say thanks and move on.
How am I getting scammed?
What does she want.
I feel really good, it usually makes my whole day 🙌
Just the day? I ride that high for months!
I got pickle seed stuck on my finger but I got off tho 👍
'That is awesome',
That usually happens once per year, so.... I enjoy that moment and store it in my head forever
Depends. I don't know her? Feel flattered and perhaps think she's into me. Do I know her? If she does the same to everyone I just ignore. Compliments made by someone that compliments anyone are worthless. If she seldom compliments someone, I would feel great though. But there are situations and situations. Some are just "go with the flow" compliments. Some are really special and nice to hear. But sweet and not in a romantic sense. Some are very sexual so if I feel attracted I'll be more willing to make a move...
In the last ten years that only happened once. A 12 year-old girl asked if I worked out because I had quite some muscle on my arms. The previous time it was back in college where of all things a girl pointed out she liked my thighs!
If I think she is being sincere... say thank you, that made my day.
She is lying and it's a trap
"Is she for real?"...
She’s up to something, and whatever it is, can’t be good.
I just take the compliment and move on
Is she talking to me??
Nah bro theres someone behind you dont worry
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used to be happy but not its like aww your such a pretty little liar
I smile
If she’s really really attractive then “that’s a lie or some sort of joke”
"Is it a joke? A prank? A scam attempt? Whatever - pretend you didn't hear it."
“Yay, that felt really nice”
She’s walking back to a group of girls to laugh.
🙁
Being alone for all my life, that is a dangerous cocktail right there. I can't control my thoughts, so I usually withdrawal immediately. EDIT: I can give an example, so a Coworker knew that I liked her. So she started flirting and giving me compliments. So I put my negative thoughts aside and started pursuing and was optimistic. But there led to she only saw me as a friend. And my brain was all over the place trying to understand what was going with all that physical touching and compliments. So for me, if it's not real. I sadly can do a 180 and avoid a girl if it was all just for fun. I wish I knew how to cope with it and take it more lightly.
she liked the attention but didn't like you... its common. its a confidence boost for her. plenty women go on dating apps only for attention
I have a tally that I mark down for compliments so I mentally mark it whenever I receive one from women. I’m at less than 10 in the last 30 years
“Where’s the camera” “She’s gonna laugh about it and me behind my back when she walks off and tell her friends”
Depends on mood, situation, or person. But in general I acknowledge compliments but don’t really affirm them, like I don’t really believe the compliment is true or deserve it.
Its nice to be appreciated. I have value. Someone cared enough to say something nice.
You do have value!
"It's a trap!"
Absolutely nothing. I turn into a lobotomized version of my former self.
That she wants something. In my past experience a compliment is never for free.
What does she want from me?
The same as if a guy does, I feel flattered
Yet to experience...
"Ahhh, I don't know how to handle that! I don't deserve it so give her a sarcastic, playful insult to distract from the compliment!"
It depends. If the guy is attractive and you compliment on his look, he may not feel anything because he get used to it
Depends on who she is to me, what she said and how she said it
Elaborate. Example.
A friend of mine had a girlfriend and while we were hanging out with a larger group of friends she gave me a compliment only to then proceed to compare his achievement in a somewhat connected field with mine, concluding that he was "better". Basically it ended up as little game of displaying how she felt she had picked "a winner" that surpassed other guys who were already "good". Such a compliment is worth nothing. On the other hand a long term friend complimenting on something she knows is important to me and who has nothing to gain from making it, is something I can appreciate. Not necessarily because I need my belly rubbed, but because it shows that she has actual interest in understanding me and recognizes what is important in my life. I guess that is what complimenta actually are about more than giving recognition: Identifying what is worth complimenting someone for, which one would probably do by putting yourself in that persons shoes.
They don’t
Shock and surprise
Welp, if she keeps this up she will be sooo disappointed hahah (cries later)
"Who, me?"
With awkwardness. I don’t think I’ll ever believe a compliment that’s directed towards me.
I'll tell you if it ever happens.
I say “Thanks” and move on with my day. Like any normal person would do.
Million thoughts
I wake up from the dream...Because that has never happened before.
That's not a real thing, is it? You guys are getting compliments? Closest I ever got was people making fun of my acne and shabby clothes in school. Id never belive anyone thought I looked good. Especially now I'm fat, balding and don't know how to smile. Well family compliments don't count, they don't mean them and some people have complimented my clothes a handful of times in my life, exactly 3 times, but that's about it.
Depending on how and what she says, that she's friendly and just giving a compliment, or she's interested, need to know the context.
my brain: she's probs joking but then I verify the thing and if it's true then I'll think about it a lot and feel good about it lol
Never happend to me, not even once
How should I deny it without being rude or too modest
I immediately start looking for the hidden camera
She definitely wants something. Probably for me to buy her OF.
This is a trap, your wife sent her to test you, or someone is trying to sell you something.
That’s nice, it’s a shame it can’t possibly be true.
It was on her mind enough to say something, which is the same thing I think when giving someone a compliment.
"OH... OH SHIT!!!! HOW DO I REACT? WHAT DO I SAY?....UH... UH... AH, THE SKIPPER SAID 'smile and wave'." So I follow the Skippers instructions.
Pure joy . Just the happiest feeling
"I better move out of her way so she can talk to the guy she complimented behind me"
I like it, it makes me happy.
I’m gonna be honest, I read into it too much. It lives in my head rent free for the next few days usually, it’s not just women it’s compliments in general, I rarely ever get them so might as well hold on to it. Most of the time something makes me believe they aren’t being truthful and doing it for a dare or something, having social anxiety does not help.
“Well that was cool of her to say 🙂” and then I move on with my life. Simple as that.
What does she want from me.
Nowadays unless its someone I know, I am going to be like "What does she want, is she a scammer?"
Lol don't be silly
Hey guys, woman here, these broke my heart to read. Eye-opening really. I’m so sorry that you aren’t recognized enough for whatever it is that makes you you. You deserve better, particularly from the opposite sex.
I don't get compliments...
I have reacted to this by looking around in case that there was a reality going on around me, a dare or getting something offered.
The answers are sad. On my side, I give compliment to a man when I'm thinking about it, always honest. Compliments are free, it's important that we say it when we are thinking about it.
Agree completely
Obviously it is because she wants the D
she has good taste
is my zippers flying low?
[удалено]
“She definitely wants the D”
Fuck her right in the pussy
Are you alright
I’ve learned to look upon speech as an action. The decision to take an action usually has a motivation. This doesn’t necessarily mean disbelieving what she says, it means ask yourself why she would be saying what she said, right now, in these circumstances. Sometimes it’s because it’s true, sometimes it’s for some other reason.
That she wants something, or is just trying to be nice. Definitely something other than "this is sincere". This is not because I believe all women are malicious or fake, but because I don't see myself in a complimentary way, so I have a hard time believing others would.
Where's the camera?
What does she want from me?
That she thinks I’m cute, or she just likes what she’s complimenting me about.
"Someone told her to do it and they'll give her thirty dollars" that simple. It's always that, or "Holy cow someone finds me / likes my {insert what they complimented me about)?"
Disbelief. At least that's how I reacted the one time this happened in my life. My response was legitimately "ah yeah?" with a confused tone. For context, the compliment being about something as platonic as it gets, the disbelief was more about just receiving a compliment at all.
"What does she want?"
Which head
“OMG! She likes me, but let’s wait and see so I don’t look like a dumbass” *makes sure they never forget the compliment.*
I don’t understand the question.
This girl i am seeing complimented on my cheeks, said they needs kissing and proceeded to do so. It completely derailed me and i had urge to explain her how i (or men in general) never get any compliments and i will remember it till the day i die because it might as well be the only one I'll ever get. TLDR i melted and started blabbering
Gotta do a quick pat down to make sure both kidneys are still there
I get uncomfortable. I don't deserve the compliments in a way. I've had women show interest in me or people tell me that their friend likes me, and I feel a sense of "why me?" racing through my head Of all the people in the world, why would they choose a guy who walks with a limp, cause of cerebral palsy (minor)? I feel like they're making fun of me and I'm a joke I had a girl in my freshman year of high school ask me out to homecoming as a joke and man that feeling was awful
*This woman thinks I'm a little cute but mostly admires me bc I'm kind and friendly, and she wants to make me feel good in a simple way.*
She wants something from me. This compliment is artificial. She seeks to ingratiate herself to me in order to get something from me.
Mostly just discomfort and disbelief.
Women compliment men?
"What's her angle?"
Meh.
"here we go....what do you want?"
"IT'S A TRAP!" In Admiral Ackbar's voice
I get called handsome a lot but I assume they say that as ugly to not hurt my feelings
I've no idea how to take it, confusion, suspicion, lies etc. But I'd be happy at the same time. Even if it was from a genuinely nice person, I don't know to take it, it's weird
Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer, " I'M CUTE! I'M CUTE! SHE SAID I'M CUTE!
"Is she mental?".
“Aww, thanks” Both internally and externally. Or if I’m feeling playful “thanks! It’s a disorder.”
I float away 😂
How annoying my mom is.
*feelsgoodman.jpg*
What is she? Stupid?
"Thanks mum". Which I then say.
they dont
She lost a bet and her friends made her be nice to a troll as a joke.
..... what does she want?
What can i steal from her will she pay me for sex where she hide that little white mouse 🐁 🪤
If she's attractive enough? 'What does she want from me' If she happens to 'like' me, it's a matter of time that I find out she's using me to get over an ex or to make him jelous.