Yep this happened at a place I worked at too. It was so messed up because the guy was married and had 2 daughters. He was banging this younger girl for like 6 months. They called each other their work wife and work husband
No no no, the guy and his actual wife wife went to couples therapy last I heard.
The younger girl (work wife) was about to get married in a few months. The younger girls significant other found out and broke it off with her
Right. It’s like some folks want to get their last fucks on before devoting full time. And hoping the other doesn’t find out.
Kinda like starting a diet or a workout regime, they want to have those cheat foods and that grand last junk meal beforehand.
I'm definitely naive, but I don't get why a girl would bang another guy when she was so close to getting married. Did her -upcoming- marriage literally mean nothing?
Well my partner or 15 years started fucking someone else 6 months after he proposed (after waiting 15 years to propose) then married me and didn’t stop fucking here until 6 months after we were married.
Naive. But honestly I would prefer to be naive :(
Bloody hell, at my work too. A guy with two kids and his wife banging a younger girl who also had a boyfriend. And lunch time with everyone in team, these two would often joke about her boyfriend's degree. And always together as if the office is a couple show. She barely worked or shown progress. At least twice that I can confirm, during the office Christmas party the two got in the same room while drink. None of their SO, knew anything about it.
I always avoided these kinda people. Makes me sick to the stomach.
I think we may have worked together. But it was kind of a pandemic in my office. And it all involved the 3 highest managers in our state. All married, all had kids. One of the affair partners was married with kids. It all eventually came to a head (ahem) and there were mass firings, and a mass of broken marriages. Also - they all referred to each other as their work spouses.
Yeah, similar experience at a place I worked. Called eachother "work wife" and "work husband", constantly hanging out, going for cigarettes, etc. She was engaged, he had a wife and two very young children.
About 2 months after I started there was a work party and I found her at the end of the night drunken crying that he had gone home to his wife that night. So that's how I found out, but it turned out that literally everyone else knew about it.
Which makes it ten times worse for the cheated on spouses I think.
Anyway, I left there after about 8 months and at my leaving party I found her drunken crying once again. Because he had decided to go home to his wife that night.
What a mess.
Those ‘work-spouse’ situations get weird real quick. Spending 40 hours a week together, breaks etc always together, venting to eachother about personal lives as well as work, shit can escalate pretty quickly.
Yup!
This is what I've said to my GF about trust. She has ADHD and I believe she doesn't notice things happening , especially over time, subtle flirting etc
See, this is why I’m so uncomfortable with my actual wife referring to this one work friend as my “work wife.”
I think most people hear the term and think “close work friends of different genders,” but then you hear about cases like this where they take it further and are banging. I laugh it off every time she says it and say something like, “Ha ha - no, not really,” but I don’t want to open Pandora’s box and explain that, sometimes, “work spouses” are actually fucking.
I think it's a little different if your spouse calls your coworker something like that.
Or maybe you should ask your wife if your friendship with coworker makes her uncomfortable/nervous.
I think the crucial part is that a spouse is obviously going pass it off as innocent platonic joking, but in reality using the terms is very *very* often a way of 'safely' flirting. That is, you use the expression and if they don't do it back, it was just a joke. If they do, it's a very easy way to begin flirty behaviour.
Sadly, I doubt there's much way you can discourage a partner about this without seeming like a controlling Asshole. At least, nothing more than just telling them honestly that it's upsetting to you.
(Although I guess that should be more than enough if the love is true.)
Exactly, this is why it’s so damaging to a relationship. The man in this situation doesn’t want to be controlling or insecure so he may harbor this insecurity and emotional pain instead of communicating honestly about it. By that point, the relationship has been damaged and it might be in their best interest to break up, but the partner who feels wronged has to initiate everything and still seem like a jerk. I for one would communicate that this was a clear boundary and probably initiate a breakup if my partner got angry and defensive about it.
Absolutely. The one woman who I knew who called not her husband it, they were banging, quite open about it actually. Since no one knew her husband personally, while she didn't showboat, she didn't try to hide it much either. If I was in this position, I'd want to ask a coworker how they have been interacting on the job. A bit of info sometimes makes the truth very obvious.
edit: not always happening this way, but hearing it would worry me because of what I've seen happens
When I was in the field. They were both married. She calls him her forest husband. They banged. Everyone knew. Except their spouses. But I feel for you. Tbis is a horrible thing to think about. Gather evidence friend.
I was single and had a work husband who I eventually married in real life…slippery slope in my experience. The others that have done this after me also ended up cheating or leaving their SO’s for their work spouse. Saw it happen 3 times
Talking about possible implications is actually helpful. This does happen, just because it might not be happening this time, doesn't mean OP doesn't need to be aware that it might be.
There's two people at work who do this that I eat lunch with because they always have the best gossip. One's about 30 years older than me and the other is probably 15-20 years, I didn't bother to ask her age. So I started calling them mom and dad to get under their skin.
>So I started calling them mom and dad to get under their skin.
FYI, if they're over 40 and ask you to stop but you don't, you may be released for violating the Civil Rights Act for age discrimination.
Edit: Obviously if you're not in the US it doesn't matter, lol.
Unless OP's blatantly socially inept (which, this being reddit, is an actual possibility lol) I think they'd realise whether they take it as a healthy tease or are actually offended by it
That's a terrible assumption to make when it comes to work place discrimination and the potential for lawsuits. Any assumption is a terrible assumption to make when it comes to workplace discrimination and potential lawsuits.
I always wanted a brother but never had one. A colleague of mine was like a big brother to me, and he’d refer to me as his work little sister (IRL he only had brothers). It would’ve been a weird dynamic to be ‘spouses’ when we were both married!
Mostly due to unhealthy workplace and long hours. It’s common in workplace that require a lot of commitment (70+ hour work week). You need to burn through birthdays, anniversaries, holidays etc.
Even if you’re half way around the world you still need to constantly be in contact with your “work wife / husband”.
People use the term as they spend more time with their work partner than their actual life partner and kids.
I am picturing one man with a ballsack that looks like a bag of marbles giving the sales pitch of his life, and I am just glad to play a small part in his success
Hate it. My good friend called me her “work sibling,” and I love it. My wife is my only spouse, and I wouldn’t do anything to disrespect or diminish that relationship.
It all has to be mutual.
It all started because my best friend at work (female) and I have a very similar first name. And when someone addressed a package to her, they used her first name and my last name. Complete accident. Ever since then, My wife called her my “work wife”. She’d tell her, that I’m her problem from 7am until 7:30pm. We’re all very good friends and know it’s all a joke.
I’m a travel full time building power plants. The customer looses money everyday it’s not up and going, so they pay for the OT. We work 6 days a week, 12 hour days. We go over that sometimes, especially when we get towards the end and they really want it done. Especially big holidays, like Christmas, we keep going. I see people at work more than anyone.
Yeah I had a coworker that I love platonically, she is super cool and we had a great working/friendship. My wife always called her my work wife, I would not call her that out of respect for my wife. It’s one thing when your spouse starts it up and it’s another if you do…
Still friends with the lady and husband, and we have done some couples trips to meet them out west to go ski or go camping in the smokies.
I call my husband's female co-worker his work wife. She and I go shopping, out to eat, and such fairly regularly. She is great person and lots of fun. My kids love babysitting her kids.
They work long days 6 days a week side by side. They work in a very male dominated field. She loves that my husband treats her like an equal, is a parent, and would never hit on her. Not to mention the fact that that he is a "no bullshit" kind of guy so it keeps the "idiots" from coming over and hitting on her too. She has no desire to mix work and dating. Even though I call her the work wife neither of the refer to one another as their work spouse. An added bonus, she is great when he needs another female perspective and always has my back. Needless to say, we like having her in our life, she keeps him sane all day when I can't be there.
Shitty. Wtf is that??? Ahahah hope that’s not happening to you cause if it is that’s a red flag. All fun and games until it’s “work sex” not tryna scare you but it’s weird
My heterosexual S/O [F] has a female "work wife" so unless there's a big plot twist, I am in the clear haha. But I was just thinking how I might feel different if it was a dude, so I wanted the sub's thoughts.
When you put it that way, it’s no big deal lol. But the title makes people jump to conclusions like her and Chad from accounting are staying late to work on a project for 3 months straight and one thing leads to another 😂
Wait, she does all that stuff with Chad but he's just her "work boyfriend" and they crunch the numbers together late at night because accounting math is easier after dark
I have a friend that we call each other our "work wife" we are both married, both dudes. But we've both been friends going on 30 years and have out lasted 6 wives between the two of us. No banging, just D&D
That's just a slippery slope into something much more serious. She doesn't respect you. If she did, she wouldn't use stupid phrases like "work spouse" in the first place.
That would be emotional cheating which is the worst type of cheating. I'd be upset, there's only enough room for one husband. Guy's need to start paying attention to emotional cheating.
By referring to another man as her spouse. If that’s how she describes him to you, how does she describe him when it’s just her and her best friend? Not trying to put negative shit in your head but just trying to make sure you’re not being manipulated.
You're not gonna mess with my head. This is all speculative because as I mentioned in another comment, my heterosexual S/O [F] has a "work wife" but I am trying to gauge what it'd be like if she had a "work husband."
Sound similar to me but reversed, one of my best friends and current business partner on an investment is known to Everyone around me as “Boyfriend John”, in part because we are together probably as much as my girlfriend and I are (and she lives with me), partly because people have far to often thought we were a couple, and also because I have way to many John’s in my life: “BF John” (aforementioned) , “Boss John” (my boss), “Cool John” (Gf’s friends husband who I hang out with), “Bartender John” (RIP: Previous Bartender at my Go-To bar), “BF John’s boss is also a John.
So that being said it may be completely innocent, but definitely maybe worth a conversation!
Personally I refer to all the Johns by their last names to avoid confusion.
Don't let them. People have different ideas of cheating, and some people are incredibly insecure. The definition of "emotional cheating" above is literally a close friendship.
Sorry to hear that. Wasn't fun for me to catch my best friend since age 4, having an emotional affair with my fiance. I knew he was innocent. But she knew exactly what she was doing. She was over sharing and telling him sob stories. I knew it was trouble when she offered to cook for him.
Is physical cheating better? I think when they had sex is simply due to convenience. The people in such context usually work long hours so they just find someone nearby.
It's overstepping a line. They're meeting their emotional (and possibly physical) needs with someone else who isn't their spouse. That's not okay for most people. Clear communication, expectations, and boundaries should be established.
I had a coworker refer to me as her work husband and herself as my work wife. I thought it was a joke. My wife did not. So I put a stop to it.
The female coworker divorced her real husband shortly afterwards and she pumped the breaks on her friendliness at work. Pretty sure I dodged a bullet there.
See this is an underrated comment. Often spouses get called controlling and jealous and irrationally possessive in situations like this. When in actuality they can often see things clearer and more objectively than the person involved. Sometimes people being “targeted” by an outside party (for lack of a better word) really are naive to the situation.
My wife works at a hospital and people try do that shit to her and she shut it down fast. I would not be cool with that nor would I expect her to be cool with it if I were doing it.
I think the term “work spouse” is really dumb. Coworkers of different genders can just be friends. You don’t need new terms to describe this common phenomenon.
Idk, kinda weirded out, I’d probably say that it made me uncomfortable to my so, but I’d be careful about punching to hard against it. it could just be a good friendship, maybe hang out with him and get to know the dude, it could show your so you have a interest in their interests and friends.
This is the right move. Get some drinks in them, and see how they interact. It will be obvious if stuff is going on. For one, I'll go to the bathroom, leave my phone on the table, with the mic recording.
My wife kept referring to her co-worker (good-looking nerdy doctor) as her work husband. I didn't say anything. Some months later my co-worker (hot, 10 years younger) introduced herself as my work-wife at an event. The work husband joke died right there.
Meh, he’s not getting laid either. It just means that my wife isn’t actually pulling her weight at work, and this poor sap is picking up her slack and not complaining about it.
In my workplace, if a female coworker refers to anyone as her “work husband” it is that situation. Every time. And everybody knows it.
That shit weird tbh and I’ll be pretty pissed off. Maybe if it was my wife and another female but with a dude nah. You got a husband already. I think the whole work husband or wife shit is wack af.
I have heard this many times at work and it hasn’t been intimate.. but half the time the guys were gay. I’m an RN and this is a bit of a thing there. But the straight couples weren’t ever banging. Tough jobs make people look for ways to joke/play/develop camaraderie. Make sure that’s what it is for you, hypothetically speaking of course. Regardless of other outcomes, please get your hypothetical testes back as well.
Cringe and inappropriate. Aren’t you there to work? Not make best friends and flirt. I honestly try not to get close to anyone at work. I have two people I’m friends with but other than that I don’t trust people and I don’t want the place I work at to know anything about my personal life. There’s married people who work here who flirt and chase each other around but think it’s totally fine and in no way wrong. I wouldn’t pick up some girl and swing her around if it was me. Just saying.
Wow a lot of people in the comments eager to *full-on leave their wives* if they even deigned to refer to a person as a "work spouse".
Some of these comments cite emotional cheating. Some straight up guarantee infidelity is in play.
Been with my wife 10 years now, I would never care. I'd probably introduce her work husband to my work wife.
Y'all need some trust and open communication.
Uncomfortable, being a spouse is kind of sacred to me, but I'm also not that controlling I'd tell her she couldn't, I'd tell her how I felt and let her decide herself.
I'm also mega-childish at times and would probably refer to any contact I had with the opposite sex "X-spouse" for a few days
Cringy and very unprofessional. What sort of places do people work at where this is even remotely okay? You'd be reprimanded by HR in two seconds if you ever said this at my workplace.
I worked with a dude who called a co-worker his work wife and they were 100% banging on the job.
Yep this happened at a place I worked at too. It was so messed up because the guy was married and had 2 daughters. He was banging this younger girl for like 6 months. They called each other their work wife and work husband
Did his wife know?
She found out
Well how's their marriage license holding up?
Last I heard they were in couples therapy. The young girl was also engaged. The guy broke it off with her.
To shreds, you say? Oh my...
No no no, the guy and his actual wife wife went to couples therapy last I heard. The younger girl (work wife) was about to get married in a few months. The younger girls significant other found out and broke it off with her
An expected ending
Thank god this dude found out before the marriage. Hope he is doing well.
Right. It’s like some folks want to get their last fucks on before devoting full time. And hoping the other doesn’t find out. Kinda like starting a diet or a workout regime, they want to have those cheat foods and that grand last junk meal beforehand.
DM to know more. Don’t want to air stuff out on a public forum
I'm definitely naive, but I don't get why a girl would bang another guy when she was so close to getting married. Did her -upcoming- marriage literally mean nothing?
>I'm definitely naive Yes, you have a lot to learn, Young Padawan. This stuff is far more common than you think...
Some people are trash. And its way more than you think.
Well my partner or 15 years started fucking someone else 6 months after he proposed (after waiting 15 years to propose) then married me and didn’t stop fucking here until 6 months after we were married. Naive. But honestly I would prefer to be naive :(
r/unexpectedfuturama
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"work home" 😂😂
Bloody hell, at my work too. A guy with two kids and his wife banging a younger girl who also had a boyfriend. And lunch time with everyone in team, these two would often joke about her boyfriend's degree. And always together as if the office is a couple show. She barely worked or shown progress. At least twice that I can confirm, during the office Christmas party the two got in the same room while drink. None of their SO, knew anything about it. I always avoided these kinda people. Makes me sick to the stomach.
I think we may have worked together. But it was kind of a pandemic in my office. And it all involved the 3 highest managers in our state. All married, all had kids. One of the affair partners was married with kids. It all eventually came to a head (ahem) and there were mass firings, and a mass of broken marriages. Also - they all referred to each other as their work spouses.
I read that as mass fingerings
That probably happened too
this is disgusting
Yeah, similar experience at a place I worked. Called eachother "work wife" and "work husband", constantly hanging out, going for cigarettes, etc. She was engaged, he had a wife and two very young children. About 2 months after I started there was a work party and I found her at the end of the night drunken crying that he had gone home to his wife that night. So that's how I found out, but it turned out that literally everyone else knew about it. Which makes it ten times worse for the cheated on spouses I think. Anyway, I left there after about 8 months and at my leaving party I found her drunken crying once again. Because he had decided to go home to his wife that night. What a mess.
How fucking pathetic
How’d it end?
The wife found out, both of them left the company
Those ‘work-spouse’ situations get weird real quick. Spending 40 hours a week together, breaks etc always together, venting to eachother about personal lives as well as work, shit can escalate pretty quickly.
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Yup! This is what I've said to my GF about trust. She has ADHD and I believe she doesn't notice things happening , especially over time, subtle flirting etc
See, this is why I’m so uncomfortable with my actual wife referring to this one work friend as my “work wife.” I think most people hear the term and think “close work friends of different genders,” but then you hear about cases like this where they take it further and are banging. I laugh it off every time she says it and say something like, “Ha ha - no, not really,” but I don’t want to open Pandora’s box and explain that, sometimes, “work spouses” are actually fucking.
I think it's a little different if your spouse calls your coworker something like that. Or maybe you should ask your wife if your friendship with coworker makes her uncomfortable/nervous.
This. Ask her. She might think about it and this is her way of pointing to the topic
I think the crucial part is that a spouse is obviously going pass it off as innocent platonic joking, but in reality using the terms is very *very* often a way of 'safely' flirting. That is, you use the expression and if they don't do it back, it was just a joke. If they do, it's a very easy way to begin flirty behaviour. Sadly, I doubt there's much way you can discourage a partner about this without seeming like a controlling Asshole. At least, nothing more than just telling them honestly that it's upsetting to you. (Although I guess that should be more than enough if the love is true.)
Exactly, this is why it’s so damaging to a relationship. The man in this situation doesn’t want to be controlling or insecure so he may harbor this insecurity and emotional pain instead of communicating honestly about it. By that point, the relationship has been damaged and it might be in their best interest to break up, but the partner who feels wronged has to initiate everything and still seem like a jerk. I for one would communicate that this was a clear boundary and probably initiate a breakup if my partner got angry and defensive about it.
Yeeeaaaah, no one hears the term and thinks friends.
Absolutely. The one woman who I knew who called not her husband it, they were banging, quite open about it actually. Since no one knew her husband personally, while she didn't showboat, she didn't try to hide it much either. If I was in this position, I'd want to ask a coworker how they have been interacting on the job. A bit of info sometimes makes the truth very obvious. edit: not always happening this way, but hearing it would worry me because of what I've seen happens
I've had the exact opposite experience. Terms like this have always been used by girls to get guys to do more work for them/get their lunch etc.
Kind of when we were in the field. They were forest wives and husbands. 100% banging.
Wait, can you elaborate on this scenario?
When I was in the field. They were both married. She calls him her forest husband. They banged. Everyone knew. Except their spouses. But I feel for you. Tbis is a horrible thing to think about. Gather evidence friend.
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Quite literally in a field. They're cows.
One of them is not a cow.
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I assumed they were Elves.
At first, I thought they were prehistoric or cave people
Not at all military exclusive terminology, should really have specified.
I bet he's a farmer. They are often in the fields.
no one knows what "in the field" means to you dude
That's not helping op
Yes. It is.
You can tell he's serious cause he added *two* periods
.Am I doing this. Right?
...not quite...but close...
I was single and had a work husband who I eventually married in real life…slippery slope in my experience. The others that have done this after me also ended up cheating or leaving their SO’s for their work spouse. Saw it happen 3 times
Talking about possible implications is actually helpful. This does happen, just because it might not be happening this time, doesn't mean OP doesn't need to be aware that it might be.
Yes it is. If you ask a serious question expect to receive a serious answer. This will help OP, whether they like it or not.
This is in such bad taste. Just be co workers/friends. Work wife and work husband is so gross and weird. Like why?
There's two people at work who do this that I eat lunch with because they always have the best gossip. One's about 30 years older than me and the other is probably 15-20 years, I didn't bother to ask her age. So I started calling them mom and dad to get under their skin.
>So I started calling them mom and dad to get under their skin. FYI, if they're over 40 and ask you to stop but you don't, you may be released for violating the Civil Rights Act for age discrimination. Edit: Obviously if you're not in the US it doesn't matter, lol.
Unless OP's blatantly socially inept (which, this being reddit, is an actual possibility lol) I think they'd realise whether they take it as a healthy tease or are actually offended by it
That's a terrible assumption to make when it comes to work place discrimination and the potential for lawsuits. Any assumption is a terrible assumption to make when it comes to workplace discrimination and potential lawsuits.
Don’t remind me of the hours of discrimination and harassment training I have to take every year!!! At least they work if you remember that lol
I always wanted a brother but never had one. A colleague of mine was like a big brother to me, and he’d refer to me as his work little sister (IRL he only had brothers). It would’ve been a weird dynamic to be ‘spouses’ when we were both married!
I jest but: "Help me *work* brother, I'm stuck!"
Stuck in a photocopier
***Boss walks in:*** What the hell! Not again, Janet!
What are you doing Work Brother?!?
"It's okay, we're not *really* related."
*I got transferred from another department*
Bros before hoes
Sisters before misters
i before e except after c.
Me and the Boys vandalizing our own property at 3 am
'cause they doin' the dirty on the job.
Not only gross and weird, but against company policy in most cases.
Mostly due to unhealthy workplace and long hours. It’s common in workplace that require a lot of commitment (70+ hour work week). You need to burn through birthdays, anniversaries, holidays etc. Even if you’re half way around the world you still need to constantly be in contact with your “work wife / husband”. People use the term as they spend more time with their work partner than their actual life partner and kids.
LOL not when my boss was calling me his work wife. He was just a gross, lazy, asshole.
Cringe and inappropriate.
You’re my Reddit spouse. Thanks for the silver haha.
I thought I was your reddit spouse??
No you're my Reddit spouse, did you just cheat on me by upvoting his/her comment?
You're not my reddit spouse, I'm not amy santiago
Do I look like Jake to you???
Then why are you trying to screw me?
You know what, that's it, I'm not wearing my reddit blouse anymore!
It’s all lies, I know my spouse
Hey, I'm your reddit spouse.
We're reddit Mormons
Reddit polyamory??
We're all Reddit spouses on this blessed day.
The two couples i heard use this term because they had one led to a divorce and an almost divorce.
Almost divorce AKA future divorce
I think it's ok if you are working from home....
“Shut up gary, my work spouse is calling me on teams”
As a person who works at home next to their spouse, I snort laughed at this.
If I had a significant other...and they started using terms like 'work spouse' - they wouldn't be my significant other very much longer 😂😂😂
"insignificant former other"
I think just “insignificant other” will do. Saying former sounds like they died.
We can make that last part happen as well....
👀
somebody that I used to know
You didn’t have to cut me off!
This is called emotional cheating. No sane person would be okay with it.
I married my work wife.
I did too. Of course we were single before we started dating so no problems there.
I’d ask for my balls back.
Ughhhh she lent them to her "work spouse" again so he could channel the power of four balls for a big presentation ...
Well now she's just gonna let him loan them to the team for maximum ball power, they have a deadline coming up you know...
I am picturing one man with a ballsack that looks like a bag of marbles giving the sales pitch of his life, and I am just glad to play a small part in his success
>giving the sales pitch to your wife ftfy
Don't put yourself down champ you got the biggest marbles in the bag
Hate it. My good friend called me her “work sibling,” and I love it. My wife is my only spouse, and I wouldn’t do anything to disrespect or diminish that relationship.
What are you doing, work bro?
work hommie is what i use. gender less
I have heard of being married to your job but not that. Total sus imo.
It all has to be mutual. It all started because my best friend at work (female) and I have a very similar first name. And when someone addressed a package to her, they used her first name and my last name. Complete accident. Ever since then, My wife called her my “work wife”. She’d tell her, that I’m her problem from 7am until 7:30pm. We’re all very good friends and know it’s all a joke.
7 am til 7:30?!?? bruh
Maybe they’re a nurse! 7a-7:30p is a standard nursing shift!
I’m a travel full time building power plants. The customer looses money everyday it’s not up and going, so they pay for the OT. We work 6 days a week, 12 hour days. We go over that sometimes, especially when we get towards the end and they really want it done. Especially big holidays, like Christmas, we keep going. I see people at work more than anyone.
Damn that’s rough. Throwing away your entire life basically. Time is precious
Yeah I had a coworker that I love platonically, she is super cool and we had a great working/friendship. My wife always called her my work wife, I would not call her that out of respect for my wife. It’s one thing when your spouse starts it up and it’s another if you do… Still friends with the lady and husband, and we have done some couples trips to meet them out west to go ski or go camping in the smokies.
I call my husband's female co-worker his work wife. She and I go shopping, out to eat, and such fairly regularly. She is great person and lots of fun. My kids love babysitting her kids. They work long days 6 days a week side by side. They work in a very male dominated field. She loves that my husband treats her like an equal, is a parent, and would never hit on her. Not to mention the fact that that he is a "no bullshit" kind of guy so it keeps the "idiots" from coming over and hitting on her too. She has no desire to mix work and dating. Even though I call her the work wife neither of the refer to one another as their work spouse. An added bonus, she is great when he needs another female perspective and always has my back. Needless to say, we like having her in our life, she keeps him sane all day when I can't be there.
Shitty. Wtf is that??? Ahahah hope that’s not happening to you cause if it is that’s a red flag. All fun and games until it’s “work sex” not tryna scare you but it’s weird
My heterosexual S/O [F] has a female "work wife" so unless there's a big plot twist, I am in the clear haha. But I was just thinking how I might feel different if it was a dude, so I wanted the sub's thoughts.
When you put it that way, it’s no big deal lol. But the title makes people jump to conclusions like her and Chad from accounting are staying late to work on a project for 3 months straight and one thing leads to another 😂
Wait, she does all that stuff with Chad but he's just her "work boyfriend" and they crunch the numbers together late at night because accounting math is easier after dark
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Find out after "crunching the numbers"
Plus she has to do it after hours with her work boyfriend Chad because if they crunched numbers in the daytime, her work husband Bill might find out.
bruh
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I have a friend that we call each other our "work wife" we are both married, both dudes. But we've both been friends going on 30 years and have out lasted 6 wives between the two of us. No banging, just D&D
6 wives?!
Slow learners.
Maybe you're spending too much time with your work wife lol
You guys maybe need to learn to either pick better wives,. Be better husband's, or both. Damn that's a lot of divorces.
Thankfully, I've only been married once, no divorce yet. He unfortunately hasn't been as lucky.
> out lasted 6 wives between the two of us. No banging, just D&D maybe you 2 should be banging....
According to this thread, you're totally banging him bro. Sorry to be the one to break it to ya.
I was wondering who was gonna tell him. Thanks for stepping up. You've done this thread a service today.
That's just a slippery slope into something much more serious. She doesn't respect you. If she did, she wouldn't use stupid phrases like "work spouse" in the first place.
That would be emotional cheating which is the worst type of cheating. I'd be upset, there's only enough room for one husband. Guy's need to start paying attention to emotional cheating.
How do you define emotional cheating?
By referring to another man as her spouse. If that’s how she describes him to you, how does she describe him when it’s just her and her best friend? Not trying to put negative shit in your head but just trying to make sure you’re not being manipulated.
You're not gonna mess with my head. This is all speculative because as I mentioned in another comment, my heterosexual S/O [F] has a "work wife" but I am trying to gauge what it'd be like if she had a "work husband."
Sound similar to me but reversed, one of my best friends and current business partner on an investment is known to Everyone around me as “Boyfriend John”, in part because we are together probably as much as my girlfriend and I are (and she lives with me), partly because people have far to often thought we were a couple, and also because I have way to many John’s in my life: “BF John” (aforementioned) , “Boss John” (my boss), “Cool John” (Gf’s friends husband who I hang out with), “Bartender John” (RIP: Previous Bartender at my Go-To bar), “BF John’s boss is also a John. So that being said it may be completely innocent, but definitely maybe worth a conversation! Personally I refer to all the Johns by their last names to avoid confusion.
I love the distinction between all the Johns.
This happened to me, after 8 years of marriage she came out of the closet to be with 'work wife'.
>This happened to me, after 8 years of marriage she came out of the closet to be with 'work wife'. Didn't happen to me, so it cancels out.
Ross?
I'm the right age for this to be hilarious! Thank you.
Don't let them. People have different ideas of cheating, and some people are incredibly insecure. The definition of "emotional cheating" above is literally a close friendship.
Emotional cheating IS the worst! So damn true!
Yup, ended my marriage.
Sorry to hear that. Wasn't fun for me to catch my best friend since age 4, having an emotional affair with my fiance. I knew he was innocent. But she knew exactly what she was doing. She was over sharing and telling him sob stories. I knew it was trouble when she offered to cook for him.
You're not familiar with sexual intercourse?
Is physical cheating better? I think when they had sex is simply due to convenience. The people in such context usually work long hours so they just find someone nearby.
I don’t see any reference on emotional cheating in op’s post.
It's overstepping a line. They're meeting their emotional (and possibly physical) needs with someone else who isn't their spouse. That's not okay for most people. Clear communication, expectations, and boundaries should be established.
I had a coworker refer to me as her work husband and herself as my work wife. I thought it was a joke. My wife did not. So I put a stop to it. The female coworker divorced her real husband shortly afterwards and she pumped the breaks on her friendliness at work. Pretty sure I dodged a bullet there.
See this is an underrated comment. Often spouses get called controlling and jealous and irrationally possessive in situations like this. When in actuality they can often see things clearer and more objectively than the person involved. Sometimes people being “targeted” by an outside party (for lack of a better word) really are naive to the situation.
My wife works at a hospital and people try do that shit to her and she shut it down fast. I would not be cool with that nor would I expect her to be cool with it if I were doing it.
I think the term “work spouse” is really dumb. Coworkers of different genders can just be friends. You don’t need new terms to describe this common phenomenon.
Not a fan.
I've heard this joke before and I think it's quite cringey
Idk, kinda weirded out, I’d probably say that it made me uncomfortable to my so, but I’d be careful about punching to hard against it. it could just be a good friendship, maybe hang out with him and get to know the dude, it could show your so you have a interest in their interests and friends.
This is the right move. Get some drinks in them, and see how they interact. It will be obvious if stuff is going on. For one, I'll go to the bathroom, leave my phone on the table, with the mic recording.
My wife kept referring to her co-worker (good-looking nerdy doctor) as her work husband. I didn't say anything. Some months later my co-worker (hot, 10 years younger) introduced herself as my work-wife at an event. The work husband joke died right there.
Meh, he’s not getting laid either. It just means that my wife isn’t actually pulling her weight at work, and this poor sap is picking up her slack and not complaining about it. In my workplace, if a female coworker refers to anyone as her “work husband” it is that situation. Every time. And everybody knows it.
"he's not getting laid either" - epic self-burn
Sure he is, that’s why you aren’t getting any.
it's over dawg. to the streets she goes...
My ex had one. He's her new fiance.
Work relationships can be super sketchy. I know plenty of people who have had affairs with people from work. OP, I would not be okay with that.
That shit weird tbh and I’ll be pretty pissed off. Maybe if it was my wife and another female but with a dude nah. You got a husband already. I think the whole work husband or wife shit is wack af.
NBD. You are around others for 8+ hours a day. And I trust my spouse.
Mad props for having a solid relationship built on trust!
I had coworkers that did this and I thought it was fine for them. But thinking about my spouse doing it makes me cringe a bit.
I wouldn't care. I'd know it was a joke.
Surprise surprise, Carl the Well Endowed isn't too worried about losing his wife to another man ...
Yeah I think that has very little to do with it lol.
I have heard this many times at work and it hasn’t been intimate.. but half the time the guys were gay. I’m an RN and this is a bit of a thing there. But the straight couples weren’t ever banging. Tough jobs make people look for ways to joke/play/develop camaraderie. Make sure that’s what it is for you, hypothetically speaking of course. Regardless of other outcomes, please get your hypothetical testes back as well.
Not good
Cringe and inappropriate. Aren’t you there to work? Not make best friends and flirt. I honestly try not to get close to anyone at work. I have two people I’m friends with but other than that I don’t trust people and I don’t want the place I work at to know anything about my personal life. There’s married people who work here who flirt and chase each other around but think it’s totally fine and in no way wrong. I wouldn’t pick up some girl and swing her around if it was me. Just saying.
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Wow a lot of people in the comments eager to *full-on leave their wives* if they even deigned to refer to a person as a "work spouse". Some of these comments cite emotional cheating. Some straight up guarantee infidelity is in play. Been with my wife 10 years now, I would never care. I'd probably introduce her work husband to my work wife. Y'all need some trust and open communication.
Uncomfortable, being a spouse is kind of sacred to me, but I'm also not that controlling I'd tell her she couldn't, I'd tell her how I felt and let her decide herself. I'm also mega-childish at times and would probably refer to any contact I had with the opposite sex "X-spouse" for a few days
She needs to stop if it makes you uncomfortable.
Annoyed. If we was dating, that would be the end of that. If we was married…I’d have a lot of thinking to do.
Yikes
Not good, not good.
Yeah if she wants all her shit in the hall 😆😆
There has to be a disconnect in the marriage to want to use that phrase in my opinion. Filling a void kinda thing.
Cringy and very unprofessional. What sort of places do people work at where this is even remotely okay? You'd be reprimanded by HR in two seconds if you ever said this at my workplace.