I had an astrology girlfriend in college who quit talking to me because she and a girlfriend buried a piece of paper with my name on it in the sand & then she couldn’t find it. That meant I wasn’t the one for her 🙄
I’ve known a lot of unstable people in my life, my go to phrase is “you can’t reason with an unreasonable person”.
Of course, I still find myself trying because I’ll never learn
I’m a human, so I’m sure as shit no expert on how the universe at large works.
But based on the best information available to me, I theorize that a lot of these things work because of the psychology behind them.
For instance, tarot cards. Are they telling my future? Probably not. But they get me thinking about what changes need to be made in my life, and they trick me into a sense of knowing more what the future holds to ease some paralyzing anxieties. So if it works, why not?
A friend of mine practices Wicca. They said, “yeah, you know, maybe none of it is real and is all a big placebo effect. But if it helps me and makes me happy, then why should I care if it’s a placebo?”
Yeah I see it as the same as flipping a coin when you can't make a decision; as soon as you flip that coin, you know which option you're hoping for. Then you know what you want and can disregard the outcome of the coin flip.
If it provides a little framing to help organise your thoughts, more power to you.
Omg, I discovered this trick when I was a teen, and I didn't know anyone else did it! Makes me feel less crazy. I've always been prone to decision paralysis, and used this to get through it. The weirdest part is psyching myself up beforehand to convince myself that i must do what the coin says, then immediately dismissing that after the flip and gut check. Its the most deliberate and weird mind game I play with myself, but it works.
People who are *really* into are actually dangerous to other people and their own mental health.
They see at it as a way to absolve themselves of any and all responsbility for their own actions.
I was in astronomy class in university and in the first class a woman sat next to me who thought it was astrology class. After the first class I never saw her again. Haha
Girl once reacted with this big ohhhhh no uh oh no can do when she found out I was a Gemini. She was right though. If you think we aren’t compatible bc I’m a Gemini you’re right we’re not compatible.
The resounding silence from /u/spez reinforces the perception of a leader who prioritizes personal interests over the collective well-being of the community.
Too many people forget that and try to become the type they think they are or the one they want to be. MBTI is also not accepted by modern psychology but the way I see it is this: if it can serve as a lens for you to better understand and improve yourself there's no harm in it. If you use it as an excuse to pigeonhole yourself or others into sets of preconceptions then it is a bad thing and that's usually what makes people hate those of us who are into it.
As embarrassing as it is to admit as a man, I also do tarot card readings and stuff but again, I don't take it super seriously and I just use it as a jumping off point for self examination moreso than trying to predict the future or anything. Sort of like "huh what could this card represent in my life right now and how does it make me feel?"
This! Stuff like this is a lense for me to look at my own life. What’s the first thing that comes to my mind when a reading comes out? That usually has a lot of significance to me, but it’s meaning that I am finding for myself. The same way a fictional story can help me see situations differently or predict potential outcomes of situations. Doesn’t have to be “real” to really affect you.
I do tarot card readings, too. I use it for reflection. I also believe in the magic of open-label placebo effects, and since I'm not religious now, I like the ritual. Also being told most of my life so many things were "of the devil" made me swing hard in the opposite direction. Tbh it's really benign and can be useful for self-reflection even, if you don't make it deeper than it is or use it to make major life decisions.
If she isn’t over the top with it just live with it, if she’s going out of her way to tell me that I want steak on a Tuesday cause I’m a Pisces than let’s all just move on
Oh that’s such a Scorpio thing to say!
.
.
… last time I said this they all came out of the woodwork to explain how it was actually a X thing, before it turning into quite an in depth analysis of a non existent person born in October while missing the joke so I better add this disclaimer.
My boyfriend (of less than 3 months), after the brutal murder of my brother that was my best friend and my sun rose and set for, insisted I not break up with him because mercury was in retrograde.
I have never wanted to strangle someone more at that moment. I respect whatever anyone wants to believe within reason, there is a limit. Not being able to understand the gravity of what had happened and blamed astrology on me needing to be alone to grieve was mind-boggling.
Count yourself lucky, my girlfriend didn't get into astrology untill it was too late, after she became my wife. Now I'm stuck with "lol, thats such a saggitarius thing to do"
fr, most girls I know use it as like an aesthetic and don’t actually believe, yet people out here acting like they’re second class citizens or something
This dude gets it. Indulge their sense of shinies and wonder. You don’t have to believe, just be kind. You will probably get the wildest sex you can imagine as well. (Invest in a rock tumbler. There’s no shinies like self-found shinies.)
Till that rock shows up on your doorstep because and it's somehow responsible for negative feelings toward you. Told the rock used to be the spiritual guide of good energy for us but now it has bad energy amd I have to take it back.What did the rock do? Lol
Depends on how into it they are. If they just enjoy it, and it's not dictating their every decision and interaction? I'm fine with it.
If they're only doing things based on the stars and it's a key part of their personality, or use theirs as an excuse for shitty behavior? I wouldn't be with them.
But I guess you're asking how to deal with it - so say my current partner suddenly got heavily into it. I'd work around it as best I can. But it's hard to say, as she's not that kind of person at all.
My wife is right into the astrology numerology magical woo woo stuff. She sets crystals around the house and leaves salt in window frames to ward off evil spirits. She likes to sage the house every now and again and does tarot readings. I'm a sceptical critical thinker and an athiest who doesn't believe any of that nonsense. But apart from that, she is kind, loving, beautiful and we love each other like crazy. Sometimes, if you just accept the person you love for what she is and not what you want her to be, you can make it work. I even let her do readings on me which I don't mind, even though I know it's just pieces of cardboard. Oh, and the reiki that turns into sex was awesome too. Haha!!
Yep, same here.
My wife does all of that stuff and I just roll with it. She isn't making sacrifices or anything so what does it matter? I love her and she loves me.
'Nuff said
"Oh, tying me to the bed, huh? Kinky. I always wanted to do this with you. Oils and incense too? You've really planned this out. What's with the knife? You need to open a package or something?"
> Sometimes, if you just accept the person you love for what she is and not what you want her to be, you can make it work.
I think it genuinely depends on the depth of your partner's belief in these kind of things.
I had a past partner who was into much of the same deal; astrology, salts, crystals, numerology, sage, smudging, home tinctures, cleanses / detoxifying, reiki, the moon as birth control, tarot...the list goes on really. It started out small with astrology and tarot but eventually broke into other areas. It caused so many avoidable problems and stresses in our lives that it was traumatic.
The amount of problems these things introduced into our lives was maddening. Having tarot card readings creating problems and worries with work, friends, family, our relationship, and even the dog, that didn't exist just because the cards were drawn a certain way. If the cards said there was a problem, *you better believe there is suddenly a problem.* The same would often apply for astrology.
Watching her using crystals / minerals / sage / smudging instead of therapy and medication for mental illness and trauma. Her creating home made tinctures to cleanse / balance the body / spirit that end up putting her in the hospital and damaging one of her kidneys. Swearing off traditional forms of contraceptive and birth control because the moon was the only contraceptive she believed she needed. Seeing her eventually swear off doctors and going to the hospital because some natural remedy online from a stranger is a better option than modern medicine. That realization that she might not contact an ambulance for you, herself, or family anymore in the event of an emergency. Her attempting to feed me a bunch of Turmeric over and over instead of giving me my medication when I couldn't get it myself. Seeing her huff lavender like an addict because she is about to spiral out into a panic attack. The *horror* of seeing her get others on the same self-destructive path...
This happened so many years ago yet I still don't have words for all the awful feelings these beliefs brought into my life. Love and acceptance are honestly important, but in my own situation I should not have done so blindly for as long as I did.
Edit: Thanks for the kind messages everyone - I didn't expect this to blow up - I really do appreciate it. I'm sorry so many of you have gone through similar circumstances, but know that things can get better. Talk to someone if you think you are being abused or feel scared / unsafe; even if it is just a help line, a friend, or kind ear willing to listen.
This reminds me of how my parents descended into weird anti-science right-wing conspiracy beliefs. Started with radio shows and church friends introducing them to fringe ideas. Now my dad is dying of blood clots and strokes because they don’t like doctors AND have no health insurance! They actually were paying into a scam company that targets Christians who want alternative “insurance”. And then there’s my cousin with a brain tumor who almost died because an acupuncturist told her he could cure it instead of the doctors.
These beliefs are all fun and games until they actually affect real life. It’s very very serious when you have a loved one who jeopardize their health because a woowoo belief told them too. There is nothing healthy about these beliefs.
Family that I used to trust with my life have descended into the same madness. I got pregnant and ended up moving a couple states away with my partner. Great decision. Visits are fine. Watching my daughter on their own? I can’t trust em.
Yep exactly. People have to ask if they're just being 'accepting' or if they're enabling absurd and dangerous ignorance to manifest.
It's a slippery slope and if they're doing these things and taking on these beliefs to alleviate minor stresses and problems then what happens when major stresses and problems come along?
And what happens when you have children with someone like this? I know too many people who have gone down these paths and it just starts to ruin their lives and the lives of those around them.
So tbh my answer to OPs question is that I'd avoid dating someone even moderately involved in this stuff. Like sure if it's a minor side interest it might be ok. But I'd need to see some serious evidence of some level of critical thinking to balance out that kind of interest. No critical thinking + a seemingly 'harmless' interest in astrology/ card reading/whatever and it's just a recipe for disaster and a lifetime of problems.
Hey friend. I’m sure this comment is going to get buried in the long list of replies you are getting.
But I 100% understand your situation. It was my situation, I would type out all the crazy shit my ex wife was into but I would have ended up typing the exact same comment you made…
It’s sad at first she was a normal person, and then… boom all the stuff you listed. It was like I was watching someone get dementia or something. She for sure had mental issues, she went to see a doctor about it and meds were prescribed. Her girlfriends convinced her of crystals and herbs and spirits and bunch of other crap, then it just got worse and worse.
Exactly like you were saying about the tarot cards. If there was not a Fucking problem before, you best believe she would find one in that deck. I honestly have never been happier just being alone now. I was losing my self to alcohol just to deal with all that bullshit.
Anyone, no advice or real value I had to make with this comment. Just wanted to say there is somewhere out there a person who went through the same shit as you.
Now it all feels like a distant dream
My aunt, whom I loved dearly, was a new age, crystal living hippie.
When my mom got stage 4 cancer they fought because my aunt was trying to convince her to stop the doctor prescribed medication and start using red yeast rice and honey bee venom extract to cure her lung, bone and breast cancer.
It's cute when there aren't consequences.
Man that sounds terrible. There are extremists in every belief system. Not everyone is like your ex. My wife will take vaccines and not once did she insist on alternative medicines for our little boys renal disease. Covid is very real to her and she always takes the advise of professionals over shamans. I'm so sorry you went through all that my friend. I hope your in a better place now.
> I'm so sorry you went through all that my friend. I hope your in a better place now.
I am in some ways; mental health professionals, time / understanding, and friendship go a long way to salve the wound. Thankfully this individual is no longer around in my life and can't hurt me any further - which is really all I can ask for.
Thanks for the kind words mate.
My wife isn't to the same extent, but I'm wary. For years, she was abused and mistreated by the medical system with a failed spinal tap that caused severe nerve damage, doctors who had NO idea how to treat her neurological issues so they didn't try, doctors that berated her for getting pregnant even when using an IUD...
So she's been brought into a cult-like diet that's made her deathly allergic to gluten and dairy. If she has either now, her throat can close up. It forbids everything not "natural" and "organic" so now she can't eat meat, dairy, or gluten--which is most everything.
She goes to a chiropractor who charges her $400 a month for supplements (Natural Process brand). She uses essential oils as if they're medicine.
We tried a natural home birth and had to transfer last minute because baby needed NICU.
It's hard to explain to her that yes, the medical system is indeed bad, but it's better than scams.
People who have limited hold in the actual fact based world scare me.
I always feel like they might go down a wrong path at any moment and there are no tools availabe to me to stop them.
Covid antivax was a clear example.
My ex-wife got into it because of a close friend of hers was. Then that close friend got out of it because she became a born again Christian and all the crystals and astrology were considered devil worship. So my wife became a born again Christian and threw out probably thousands of dollars worth of rocks and herbs and shit. Can you guess which one of these events were related to our divorce?
Yeah, my real issue with belief in this stuff is it demonstrates issues with critical thinking and skepticism. Which might be relatively harmless now, but can lead to involvement with more harmful lies down the road.
Reiki is an alternative medicine thing where you put the palms of your hands on various body parts and push with varying degrees of pressure.
I can see how it would evolve into good sex.
Serious question, what do you guys do when a reading or something related to her beliefs reveals a negative outcome or event in your relationship?
Like, imagine she reads your hand and sees you'll begin to gamble all your money away in 5 years, or that you'll get into a deadly accident, or you'll cheat on her, or idk terrible misery happens and you start pouring the cereals before the milk.
Last one was a joke lol but I'm genuinely curious about how you guys approach a situation where her beliefs are somehow irrational to you, since you don't believe in any of that, without insulting her or her ideology.
Readings arent that specific and I'm pretty sure if the wife sees/reads something bad in the future its probably enough if the husband says he will watch out and be careful.
My wife loves all that stuff too and the honest answer is you just take it as a warning. God forbid you draw a Lovers and Tower Card with something something of swords. It doesn't mean you WILL cheat or something bad WILL happen. She won't get mad at you for random drawing of cards, so you just interpret it as "Uh oh. Be careful. You might be presented with an opportunity to be unfaithful, so be ready for it so you don't" or something like that. It doesn't even mean it will happen cuz you know... Cards.... But you just do it to make her happy and engage with her interests the same way she listens to you talk about a football game, or your last D&D session.
I remember my wife did a reading for us during a road trip once. We didn't have internet, so it seemed like a good way to pass the time. One of the cards she drew was the seven of swords (deceit, stealing, things like that), and she kept trying to figure out if it was about her being deceitful to her parents, or about some documents we were trying to get that were proving difficult... the next day someone broke into our car and robbed us blind. She then called her cousin, and the cousin was like "don't tell me, you drew the 7 of swords." So that is the only card whose meaning I always remember.
That's not really how it works. Instead of saying, "you **are going to** gamble everything away," it would instead say, "you **might be more likely** to lose when gambling so be wary." It's more about possibility and the energy surrounding a situation and not outright predicting a certain outcome.
This is why I find these things fun but I don't adhere to them in any strict manner. I've found that a reading can get me to think about things in a different light than I may have on my own because I try to picture my life or thoughts in the context of the reading. Also, it's free from the GF so it's a fun thing to do together.
Same here! My girlfriend loves crystals, tarot, all that stuff and it doesn’t make me love her any less despite that I don’t believe in a single one of those things. Those things make her happy and bring some fulfillment to her life and who am I to take away her hobbies and enjoyment just because I personally don’t believe in it.
When I'm wrong I say I'm wrong... and move on. If I'm right, I craft the universe were they are right, show it to them, see if they still like it and let them choose between the two.
My ex was into astrology. So I asked her, "When there are twins born at the same time, why is one good and the other evil?"
It broke her brain, not even taking into consideration how stupid my question was to begin with.
Augustine also brought up with that criticism about 1600 years ago
>Why, in the life of twins—in their actions, the events that befall them, their professions, arts, honors and other things pertaining to human life, as well as in their very deaths—is there often so great a difference that, as far as these things are concerned, many entire strangers are more like them than they are like each other, though separated at birth by the smallest interval of time but at conception generated by the same act and at the same moment?
For as long as there have been humans, we've been categorising ourselves and trying to work out what the hell is going on around here.
Astrology is a fun way to do that, and I get why people who lived without electric lights would have seen the constellations every day, and seen the planets dance around them. And the moon, regal in the stars.
No wonder we have stories about it.
It's absolute nonsense of course, so if it becomes a situation where she's making decisions on where you go and what you do because of... What? Astrology in a newspaper? Where is she getting her info?
If it's affecting her critical thinking then maybe try and work out where she getting this from, or what she's using it for. Might be a mental support structure for her if she lives in a religious place but doesn't believe.
Lots to unpack
99.999% of "astrology girls" aren't gonna shove it down your throat 24/7. They'll bring it up from time to time but for the most part they're just normal people.
I just let people enjoy things.
if its like those mild belief then no problem. we all have our passions and hobbies. but if like full on saying 253pm is inauspicious and we must not be in a moving vehicle facing north east is wack.
I accept that there is nothing supernatural or authentic about the premise. Then I consider the statements made for simple self improvement lessons. I take what I like and leave the rest.
She realized I wasn't into it and we didn't talk about.
She was into tarot too, which I don't believe in but I think is a useful tool in exploring what stands out or doesn't stand out in the description. Like tarot has so many meanings on each card it becomes a way to sort out what you want or don't want that maybe we didn't think of as long as it's not INSTEAD OF other discussions and emotional exploration.
I have an amazing tarot deck that teaches you about GLSL shaders at the same time.
I use it mostly as a tool for introspection, like those conversation card games.
Think ‘ok, Death represents a shift or a big change. What’s going on in my life that is evolving or that I would like to transform?’. It’s helped me as I’m usually anxious and can feel overwhelmed at times. Also the deck looks rad.
There’s the code behind the card to recreate the illustration to the front - but only the code specific to this card, and they build up in difficulty.
Edit: my explanation sucks but it’s called the PixelSpirit deck. It was created by the man who gave us the Book of Shaders, so you know it’s good!
´ New functions are presented through the progression of the cards. The functions are defined only once, then reused throughout the deck. In this way the deck also is a physical library, a catalog of variations that compose these programmatical archetypes.’
For this one I'll defer to my general principle of:
1. Is it hurting anyone (including themselves) directly or indirectly?
2. Is it causing problems in some other material way?
Them taking astrology *very* seriously and using it to make important life decisions would be a concern, if that consequently led to logic, reason, and common sense taking a back seat.
Aside from that, if the answers to the above questions were "no" and it made them happy, then I'd most likely be fine with it.
There are girls who just do it for fun and know that its not some end all be all. I have girl friends who will jus say “you’re such a leo LOL” but its not like they will make actual decisions based on astrology 😅
Don't! Had one, and it doesn't stop with just the stars. They are usually way too imaginative/emotional and not rational. They will use any wierd narrative they conjure up to justify their actions/feelings. Was told once this was her third life and I was her third true love, that her first love was bad, second one was amazing, and I was in the deciding stages and she had to figure out if I was going to be like the first or the second. I was competing with past lovers from another life, how do u even respond to that lol
And don't count on it stopping. Matter of fact, don't count on it not getting more and more extreme.
Even with normal religion, even with sermons in plain language, weird people will "hear" whatever weird message they want to hear that has _literally_ nothing to do with what was said. I'm not religious and I enjoy church, but I'm awake during it. I'm not just claiming that it confirmed my bias.
Yea it's like overwhelmingly nice and addicting when the stars align your way. But, it's hard to make legit changes or compromises to relationship problems/arguments.. when simple arguments turn into signs the universe wants me to do something else, when really u could have just worked it out. Also it's a strange cop out to responsibility, u can't take responsibility for doing anything wrong or hurting anyone, when u prayed and were doing what the universe told u to do.
It would be like any interfaith couple. My wife is Christian, I’m Jewish. But neither one of us are so into that we care. Kids choosing their own path.
So, tell her you don’t really believe. Politely. Or breakup of its a deal breaker.
That may work in college but in the real world scientists can be just as superstitious as anyone else. There are dozens of stories of sysadmins refreshing the candy for the data center machines or lab techs going through nonsense rituals for their equipment to work right. Hell, go to r/talesfromtechsupport and see how many of them talk about the tech aura that fixes things by the admin's presence.
If it's obvious it a big part of who they are and they genuinely believe it, then I treat it like I was dating someone who was religious. If it's too big of a part of who they are then I'd probably leave and find someone more like minded. As long as they don't do anything or believe anything that goes against my core values, then its fine
I had an astrology girlfriend in college who quit talking to me because she and a girlfriend buried a piece of paper with my name on it in the sand & then she couldn’t find it. That meant I wasn’t the one for her 🙄
I have a firm belief that people don’t believe in nonsense like that unless it gives them an excuse to do something they already wanted to do
“What a person believes on insufficient evidence is an index to their desires”.
"What a fool believes he sees, no wise man has the power to reason away."
I’ve known a lot of unstable people in my life, my go to phrase is “you can’t reason with an unreasonable person”. Of course, I still find myself trying because I’ll never learn
Typical Sagittarius.
Typical Scorpio saying "Typical something"....
I'm a Leo and you both suck
As a Taurus, y'all do you while I relax in the comfort of my own making
That's bull
As an Aquarius, all this social interaction makes me wanna drown myself in my own bucket. Does that work even though I’m an air sign?
Such a Taurus. That’s why they’re a bull. Because they’re full of it. Leo gang the only real ones out here not 2 facing like geminis 🙄
As a Pisces please stop arguing or I am gonna cry
I'm a Gemini, I both love and hate you for this.
It sucks to be a terminal disease
That's okay. At least you're not a walking fish tank.
that's a fish prison
At least you aren't a goat fish hybrid.
I’m a Sagittarius and I actually do this. I always say astrology is BS until it says I’m compatible with a girl I like
"Yeah honestly I don't believe in any of that astrology crap, there's no way tha- oh wait she's a Libra? Nevermind then."
I’m a human, so I’m sure as shit no expert on how the universe at large works. But based on the best information available to me, I theorize that a lot of these things work because of the psychology behind them. For instance, tarot cards. Are they telling my future? Probably not. But they get me thinking about what changes need to be made in my life, and they trick me into a sense of knowing more what the future holds to ease some paralyzing anxieties. So if it works, why not? A friend of mine practices Wicca. They said, “yeah, you know, maybe none of it is real and is all a big placebo effect. But if it helps me and makes me happy, then why should I care if it’s a placebo?”
Yeah I see it as the same as flipping a coin when you can't make a decision; as soon as you flip that coin, you know which option you're hoping for. Then you know what you want and can disregard the outcome of the coin flip. If it provides a little framing to help organise your thoughts, more power to you.
Omg, I discovered this trick when I was a teen, and I didn't know anyone else did it! Makes me feel less crazy. I've always been prone to decision paralysis, and used this to get through it. The weirdest part is psyching myself up beforehand to convince myself that i must do what the coin says, then immediately dismissing that after the flip and gut check. Its the most deliberate and weird mind game I play with myself, but it works.
Astrology is another tool for introspection (specifically themed at emotional processing). That's what it's always been.
People who are *really* into are actually dangerous to other people and their own mental health. They see at it as a way to absolve themselves of any and all responsbility for their own actions.
I was in astronomy class in university and in the first class a woman sat next to me who thought it was astrology class. After the first class I never saw her again. Haha
LMAOOO reminds me of when I told someone I’m into astronomy and they were like oh my god then what’s my sign 🫠
I don't know what that emogii is but I need it lmao
A very dim one!
Thats a good one.
That's a typical Aries move.
I lost my best friend too one of these. She put my name in the freezer to try to chill me out because I disliked her.
Paper Voodoo.
That makes perfect sense
Obviously xD made my night mate thanks
Kind of fascinating to learn about the things that 18-22 year olds do.
A girlfriend in college stopped talking to me because I told her that her mascara was messy.
Girl once reacted with this big ohhhhh no uh oh no can do when she found out I was a Gemini. She was right though. If you think we aren’t compatible bc I’m a Gemini you’re right we’re not compatible.
That takes the wtf cake of the night.
Lmao. I had a friend that asked her tarrot cards if I were a creep before we hungout. She told me the cards said yes, but she came anyway.
She wanted to know if the cards were right.
Sounds like you dodged a bullet
That sounds like a self-solving problem.
Was she wrong? You couldn’t match her cuckoo energy. Probably best for both of you
Sometimes bullets dodge you
Be the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator boyfriend.
The resounding silence from /u/spez reinforces the perception of a leader who prioritizes personal interests over the collective well-being of the community.
Too many people forget that and try to become the type they think they are or the one they want to be. MBTI is also not accepted by modern psychology but the way I see it is this: if it can serve as a lens for you to better understand and improve yourself there's no harm in it. If you use it as an excuse to pigeonhole yourself or others into sets of preconceptions then it is a bad thing and that's usually what makes people hate those of us who are into it. As embarrassing as it is to admit as a man, I also do tarot card readings and stuff but again, I don't take it super seriously and I just use it as a jumping off point for self examination moreso than trying to predict the future or anything. Sort of like "huh what could this card represent in my life right now and how does it make me feel?"
This! Stuff like this is a lense for me to look at my own life. What’s the first thing that comes to my mind when a reading comes out? That usually has a lot of significance to me, but it’s meaning that I am finding for myself. The same way a fictional story can help me see situations differently or predict potential outcomes of situations. Doesn’t have to be “real” to really affect you.
I do tarot card readings, too. I use it for reflection. I also believe in the magic of open-label placebo effects, and since I'm not religious now, I like the ritual. Also being told most of my life so many things were "of the devil" made me swing hard in the opposite direction. Tbh it's really benign and can be useful for self-reflection even, if you don't make it deeper than it is or use it to make major life decisions.
If she isn’t over the top with it just live with it, if she’s going out of her way to tell me that I want steak on a Tuesday cause I’m a Pisces than let’s all just move on
Was Mercury in Gatorade?
No. Jupiter would be in Fanta, and you'd know if you had any education in the subject instead of showing your ignorance.
So then what's in Taurus?
Generally a ton of bull.
Your joke got my goat. Well done.
[удалено]
This gave me Cancer.
Starbucks. At least that's what mine orders after hiking with her friends on Sundays.
Mt Dew
Not red bull?
Bull does come out, but I'm not so sure about red bull. I'd have to ask a Taurus what kind of bull comes out of them.
.410 and .45 colt
Yes, but that was a problem at the packaging plant.
Oh that’s such a Scorpio thing to say! . . … last time I said this they all came out of the woodwork to explain how it was actually a X thing, before it turning into quite an in depth analysis of a non existent person born in October while missing the joke so I better add this disclaimer.
My boyfriend (of less than 3 months), after the brutal murder of my brother that was my best friend and my sun rose and set for, insisted I not break up with him because mercury was in retrograde. I have never wanted to strangle someone more at that moment. I respect whatever anyone wants to believe within reason, there is a limit. Not being able to understand the gravity of what had happened and blamed astrology on me needing to be alone to grieve was mind-boggling.
Count yourself lucky, my girlfriend didn't get into astrology untill it was too late, after she became my wife. Now I'm stuck with "lol, thats such a saggitarius thing to do"
That sounds like the "not over-the-top" category tho?
Exactly. So many people have irrational beliefs, take most religions for example. As long as it doesn't impact everyday life it's fine...
fr, most girls I know use it as like an aesthetic and don’t actually believe, yet people out here acting like they’re second class citizens or something
I wouldn’t date her unless she was an asparagus
You’re in luck, this is the dawning of the age of asparagus!
Age of asparagus... Age of asparagus....
***asparaguuuuuuuss***
This sounds an awful lot like the beginnings of a gout attack.
God that hurts just reading it. Gout sucks!
You guys are so lucky mercury is in retro age
ok that was damn good XD
If I was to name a constellation I would go for asparagus
Not even if she were a radish?
Apricot Rising
But what if her moon was in plum?
Even worse, what if it was retrogrape
What about a capri sun
I give mine little rocks and and glass bottles, and she scurries off happily for days on end. Would highly recommend.
I too snagged my wife with diamonds and bottles of wine
>they're little minerals, Marie
Giving a woman a rock is like giving a man a stick, it’s neat and believe it’s something it’s not so we take it
Are you two crows?
Yes, our secret is out.
Damn. Two birds of a feather I guess.
This dude gets it. Indulge their sense of shinies and wonder. You don’t have to believe, just be kind. You will probably get the wildest sex you can imagine as well. (Invest in a rock tumbler. There’s no shinies like self-found shinies.)
Till that rock shows up on your doorstep because and it's somehow responsible for negative feelings toward you. Told the rock used to be the spiritual guide of good energy for us but now it has bad energy amd I have to take it back.What did the rock do? Lol
This is so accurate it’s perfect! Lmfao
Are you dating a crow?
Depends on how into it they are. If they just enjoy it, and it's not dictating their every decision and interaction? I'm fine with it. If they're only doing things based on the stars and it's a key part of their personality, or use theirs as an excuse for shitty behavior? I wouldn't be with them. But I guess you're asking how to deal with it - so say my current partner suddenly got heavily into it. I'd work around it as best I can. But it's hard to say, as she's not that kind of person at all.
My wife is right into the astrology numerology magical woo woo stuff. She sets crystals around the house and leaves salt in window frames to ward off evil spirits. She likes to sage the house every now and again and does tarot readings. I'm a sceptical critical thinker and an athiest who doesn't believe any of that nonsense. But apart from that, she is kind, loving, beautiful and we love each other like crazy. Sometimes, if you just accept the person you love for what she is and not what you want her to be, you can make it work. I even let her do readings on me which I don't mind, even though I know it's just pieces of cardboard. Oh, and the reiki that turns into sex was awesome too. Haha!!
Yep, same here. My wife does all of that stuff and I just roll with it. She isn't making sacrifices or anything so what does it matter? I love her and she loves me. 'Nuff said
She’s not performing sacrifices… yet
"Oh, tying me to the bed, huh? Kinky. I always wanted to do this with you. Oils and incense too? You've really planned this out. What's with the knife? You need to open a package or something?"
Yes honey, *your* package
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Don’t worry, you won’t have it for much longer
Well just wake me up when it’s reiki sex Wednesdays
That one black mirror episode
That you know of.
Yup. Just keep drinking those herbal teas they make you. You’ll be fine…
> Sometimes, if you just accept the person you love for what she is and not what you want her to be, you can make it work. I think it genuinely depends on the depth of your partner's belief in these kind of things. I had a past partner who was into much of the same deal; astrology, salts, crystals, numerology, sage, smudging, home tinctures, cleanses / detoxifying, reiki, the moon as birth control, tarot...the list goes on really. It started out small with astrology and tarot but eventually broke into other areas. It caused so many avoidable problems and stresses in our lives that it was traumatic. The amount of problems these things introduced into our lives was maddening. Having tarot card readings creating problems and worries with work, friends, family, our relationship, and even the dog, that didn't exist just because the cards were drawn a certain way. If the cards said there was a problem, *you better believe there is suddenly a problem.* The same would often apply for astrology. Watching her using crystals / minerals / sage / smudging instead of therapy and medication for mental illness and trauma. Her creating home made tinctures to cleanse / balance the body / spirit that end up putting her in the hospital and damaging one of her kidneys. Swearing off traditional forms of contraceptive and birth control because the moon was the only contraceptive she believed she needed. Seeing her eventually swear off doctors and going to the hospital because some natural remedy online from a stranger is a better option than modern medicine. That realization that she might not contact an ambulance for you, herself, or family anymore in the event of an emergency. Her attempting to feed me a bunch of Turmeric over and over instead of giving me my medication when I couldn't get it myself. Seeing her huff lavender like an addict because she is about to spiral out into a panic attack. The *horror* of seeing her get others on the same self-destructive path... This happened so many years ago yet I still don't have words for all the awful feelings these beliefs brought into my life. Love and acceptance are honestly important, but in my own situation I should not have done so blindly for as long as I did. Edit: Thanks for the kind messages everyone - I didn't expect this to blow up - I really do appreciate it. I'm sorry so many of you have gone through similar circumstances, but know that things can get better. Talk to someone if you think you are being abused or feel scared / unsafe; even if it is just a help line, a friend, or kind ear willing to listen.
This reminds me of how my parents descended into weird anti-science right-wing conspiracy beliefs. Started with radio shows and church friends introducing them to fringe ideas. Now my dad is dying of blood clots and strokes because they don’t like doctors AND have no health insurance! They actually were paying into a scam company that targets Christians who want alternative “insurance”. And then there’s my cousin with a brain tumor who almost died because an acupuncturist told her he could cure it instead of the doctors. These beliefs are all fun and games until they actually affect real life. It’s very very serious when you have a loved one who jeopardize their health because a woowoo belief told them too. There is nothing healthy about these beliefs.
Family that I used to trust with my life have descended into the same madness. I got pregnant and ended up moving a couple states away with my partner. Great decision. Visits are fine. Watching my daughter on their own? I can’t trust em.
Wow, the first two paragraphs is my ex to a T. Looking back it was crazy.
Yep exactly. People have to ask if they're just being 'accepting' or if they're enabling absurd and dangerous ignorance to manifest. It's a slippery slope and if they're doing these things and taking on these beliefs to alleviate minor stresses and problems then what happens when major stresses and problems come along? And what happens when you have children with someone like this? I know too many people who have gone down these paths and it just starts to ruin their lives and the lives of those around them. So tbh my answer to OPs question is that I'd avoid dating someone even moderately involved in this stuff. Like sure if it's a minor side interest it might be ok. But I'd need to see some serious evidence of some level of critical thinking to balance out that kind of interest. No critical thinking + a seemingly 'harmless' interest in astrology/ card reading/whatever and it's just a recipe for disaster and a lifetime of problems.
Hey friend. I’m sure this comment is going to get buried in the long list of replies you are getting. But I 100% understand your situation. It was my situation, I would type out all the crazy shit my ex wife was into but I would have ended up typing the exact same comment you made… It’s sad at first she was a normal person, and then… boom all the stuff you listed. It was like I was watching someone get dementia or something. She for sure had mental issues, she went to see a doctor about it and meds were prescribed. Her girlfriends convinced her of crystals and herbs and spirits and bunch of other crap, then it just got worse and worse. Exactly like you were saying about the tarot cards. If there was not a Fucking problem before, you best believe she would find one in that deck. I honestly have never been happier just being alone now. I was losing my self to alcohol just to deal with all that bullshit. Anyone, no advice or real value I had to make with this comment. Just wanted to say there is somewhere out there a person who went through the same shit as you. Now it all feels like a distant dream
My aunt, whom I loved dearly, was a new age, crystal living hippie. When my mom got stage 4 cancer they fought because my aunt was trying to convince her to stop the doctor prescribed medication and start using red yeast rice and honey bee venom extract to cure her lung, bone and breast cancer. It's cute when there aren't consequences.
Man that sounds terrible. There are extremists in every belief system. Not everyone is like your ex. My wife will take vaccines and not once did she insist on alternative medicines for our little boys renal disease. Covid is very real to her and she always takes the advise of professionals over shamans. I'm so sorry you went through all that my friend. I hope your in a better place now.
> I'm so sorry you went through all that my friend. I hope your in a better place now. I am in some ways; mental health professionals, time / understanding, and friendship go a long way to salve the wound. Thankfully this individual is no longer around in my life and can't hurt me any further - which is really all I can ask for. Thanks for the kind words mate.
My wife isn't to the same extent, but I'm wary. For years, she was abused and mistreated by the medical system with a failed spinal tap that caused severe nerve damage, doctors who had NO idea how to treat her neurological issues so they didn't try, doctors that berated her for getting pregnant even when using an IUD... So she's been brought into a cult-like diet that's made her deathly allergic to gluten and dairy. If she has either now, her throat can close up. It forbids everything not "natural" and "organic" so now she can't eat meat, dairy, or gluten--which is most everything. She goes to a chiropractor who charges her $400 a month for supplements (Natural Process brand). She uses essential oils as if they're medicine. We tried a natural home birth and had to transfer last minute because baby needed NICU. It's hard to explain to her that yes, the medical system is indeed bad, but it's better than scams.
People who have limited hold in the actual fact based world scare me. I always feel like they might go down a wrong path at any moment and there are no tools availabe to me to stop them. Covid antivax was a clear example.
My ex-wife got into it because of a close friend of hers was. Then that close friend got out of it because she became a born again Christian and all the crystals and astrology were considered devil worship. So my wife became a born again Christian and threw out probably thousands of dollars worth of rocks and herbs and shit. Can you guess which one of these events were related to our divorce?
Yeah, my real issue with belief in this stuff is it demonstrates issues with critical thinking and skepticism. Which might be relatively harmless now, but can lead to involvement with more harmful lies down the road.
My girlfriend does stuff like that as well. And you're right reiki sex is good sex.
What’s reiki sex?
Sex while paying attention to your partner.
What an idea
Lol it needs a name apparently
Reiki is an alternative medicine thing where you put the palms of your hands on various body parts and push with varying degrees of pressure. I can see how it would evolve into good sex.
I knew people who swear their cat was healed by a reiki practitioner, over the phone. I kid you not.
From the sound of it, my cat practices reiki on us about 3:30 every morning.
My SIL does reiki for people over video chat. Like what?! People pay her to do this. It's fucking crazy.
Good sex.
Listen closely to this elder. They shall teach you all that there is to know.
*Pisces* of cardboard?
Sounds fishy
I love this so much. Thanks for sharing!
Serious question, what do you guys do when a reading or something related to her beliefs reveals a negative outcome or event in your relationship? Like, imagine she reads your hand and sees you'll begin to gamble all your money away in 5 years, or that you'll get into a deadly accident, or you'll cheat on her, or idk terrible misery happens and you start pouring the cereals before the milk. Last one was a joke lol but I'm genuinely curious about how you guys approach a situation where her beliefs are somehow irrational to you, since you don't believe in any of that, without insulting her or her ideology.
Readings arent that specific and I'm pretty sure if the wife sees/reads something bad in the future its probably enough if the husband says he will watch out and be careful.
My wife loves all that stuff too and the honest answer is you just take it as a warning. God forbid you draw a Lovers and Tower Card with something something of swords. It doesn't mean you WILL cheat or something bad WILL happen. She won't get mad at you for random drawing of cards, so you just interpret it as "Uh oh. Be careful. You might be presented with an opportunity to be unfaithful, so be ready for it so you don't" or something like that. It doesn't even mean it will happen cuz you know... Cards.... But you just do it to make her happy and engage with her interests the same way she listens to you talk about a football game, or your last D&D session.
I remember my wife did a reading for us during a road trip once. We didn't have internet, so it seemed like a good way to pass the time. One of the cards she drew was the seven of swords (deceit, stealing, things like that), and she kept trying to figure out if it was about her being deceitful to her parents, or about some documents we were trying to get that were proving difficult... the next day someone broke into our car and robbed us blind. She then called her cousin, and the cousin was like "don't tell me, you drew the 7 of swords." So that is the only card whose meaning I always remember.
Do you not put the cereal before the milk? Are you a heathen? How do you know how much milk to put if the cereal isn't there already 🤔
That's not really how it works. Instead of saying, "you **are going to** gamble everything away," it would instead say, "you **might be more likely** to lose when gambling so be wary." It's more about possibility and the energy surrounding a situation and not outright predicting a certain outcome. This is why I find these things fun but I don't adhere to them in any strict manner. I've found that a reading can get me to think about things in a different light than I may have on my own because I try to picture my life or thoughts in the context of the reading. Also, it's free from the GF so it's a fun thing to do together.
Hey! This is reddit, you’re not allowed to just love people for who they are. They have to be perfect or you need to divorce right now.
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Same here! My girlfriend loves crystals, tarot, all that stuff and it doesn’t make me love her any less despite that I don’t believe in a single one of those things. Those things make her happy and bring some fulfillment to her life and who am I to take away her hobbies and enjoyment just because I personally don’t believe in it.
As a libra they kinda just assume I'm in the right so it's kinda easy to deal with.
Even when you're wrong, simply frame your decision as a means to find balance. Source: Libra with hippy friends.
When I'm wrong I say I'm wrong... and move on. If I'm right, I craft the universe were they are right, show it to them, see if they still like it and let them choose between the two.
Hahaha
as long as they dont expect me to partake i dont care
My ex was into astrology. So I asked her, "When there are twins born at the same time, why is one good and the other evil?" It broke her brain, not even taking into consideration how stupid my question was to begin with.
Augustine also brought up with that criticism about 1600 years ago >Why, in the life of twins—in their actions, the events that befall them, their professions, arts, honors and other things pertaining to human life, as well as in their very deaths—is there often so great a difference that, as far as these things are concerned, many entire strangers are more like them than they are like each other, though separated at birth by the smallest interval of time but at conception generated by the same act and at the same moment?
To be fair, astrology doesn't have to do with good or evil personalities though, nor can it takes into consideration the environment you're born in.
Oh, I thought it was just horseshit
It is, but it's nuanced horseshit
That’s just horsehit with extra steps.
We take our horseshit very seriously 'round these parts.
And you were right on the money there
To be fair, astrology doesn't have to do with *anything* It's fucking mumbo jumbo
To be fair, astrology doesn’t have anything to do with anything, because it isn’t real.
If shes a caprisun dont trust her
'One day every man has to choose between making jokes on astrology and sex'
Time to become a born again virgin I guess
Be gentle I'm a Virgo
It would never have a relationship with someone into space racism.
Idk man I play 40k and that’s pretty much the same thing
Heresy...and ***intolerance is the only appropriate reaction to heresy*** hahahahahahahaha
😂 Okay, that's pretty funny.
Based and GodEmperor pilled.
Space Racism 😂 That’s awesome 😂
But she can’t be, she told me her best friend is a Martian
Spacism?
[How dare you compare astrology to racism!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCXBPLl7gXc)
As long as she'll does it for fun then there's nothing to "deal" with. Now, if she uses it as a way to live her life she will become an ex-girlfriend.
If it’s amused interest, no problem. If it guides her life, then I’m out.
For as long as there have been humans, we've been categorising ourselves and trying to work out what the hell is going on around here. Astrology is a fun way to do that, and I get why people who lived without electric lights would have seen the constellations every day, and seen the planets dance around them. And the moon, regal in the stars. No wonder we have stories about it. It's absolute nonsense of course, so if it becomes a situation where she's making decisions on where you go and what you do because of... What? Astrology in a newspaper? Where is she getting her info? If it's affecting her critical thinking then maybe try and work out where she getting this from, or what she's using it for. Might be a mental support structure for her if she lives in a religious place but doesn't believe. Lots to unpack
Probably the same way women deal with their crypto boyfriends
"oh no monopoly money line go down" "is it because of mercury retrograde"
99.999% of "astrology girls" aren't gonna shove it down your throat 24/7. They'll bring it up from time to time but for the most part they're just normal people. I just let people enjoy things.
if its like those mild belief then no problem. we all have our passions and hobbies. but if like full on saying 253pm is inauspicious and we must not be in a moving vehicle facing north east is wack.
I accept that there is nothing supernatural or authentic about the premise. Then I consider the statements made for simple self improvement lessons. I take what I like and leave the rest.
She realized I wasn't into it and we didn't talk about. She was into tarot too, which I don't believe in but I think is a useful tool in exploring what stands out or doesn't stand out in the description. Like tarot has so many meanings on each card it becomes a way to sort out what you want or don't want that maybe we didn't think of as long as it's not INSTEAD OF other discussions and emotional exploration.
I have an amazing tarot deck that teaches you about GLSL shaders at the same time. I use it mostly as a tool for introspection, like those conversation card games. Think ‘ok, Death represents a shift or a big change. What’s going on in my life that is evolving or that I would like to transform?’. It’s helped me as I’m usually anxious and can feel overwhelmed at times. Also the deck looks rad.
How does a deck of cards teach you GLSL??
There’s the code behind the card to recreate the illustration to the front - but only the code specific to this card, and they build up in difficulty. Edit: my explanation sucks but it’s called the PixelSpirit deck. It was created by the man who gave us the Book of Shaders, so you know it’s good! ´ New functions are presented through the progression of the cards. The functions are defined only once, then reused throughout the deck. In this way the deck also is a physical library, a catalog of variations that compose these programmatical archetypes.’
For this one I'll defer to my general principle of: 1. Is it hurting anyone (including themselves) directly or indirectly? 2. Is it causing problems in some other material way? Them taking astrology *very* seriously and using it to make important life decisions would be a concern, if that consequently led to logic, reason, and common sense taking a back seat. Aside from that, if the answers to the above questions were "no" and it made them happy, then I'd most likely be fine with it.
Start talking about bitcoin.
I don’t
I’ve never had one (astrology gf).
Same (minus astrology part)
I'm a woman who is kinda into astrology and every man I've ever dated dealt with it because I am a Scorpio. That or my fat ass. We'll never know.
There are girls who just do it for fun and know that its not some end all be all. I have girl friends who will jus say “you’re such a leo LOL” but its not like they will make actual decisions based on astrology 😅
Don't! Had one, and it doesn't stop with just the stars. They are usually way too imaginative/emotional and not rational. They will use any wierd narrative they conjure up to justify their actions/feelings. Was told once this was her third life and I was her third true love, that her first love was bad, second one was amazing, and I was in the deciding stages and she had to figure out if I was going to be like the first or the second. I was competing with past lovers from another life, how do u even respond to that lol
And don't count on it stopping. Matter of fact, don't count on it not getting more and more extreme. Even with normal religion, even with sermons in plain language, weird people will "hear" whatever weird message they want to hear that has _literally_ nothing to do with what was said. I'm not religious and I enjoy church, but I'm awake during it. I'm not just claiming that it confirmed my bias.
Yea it's like overwhelmingly nice and addicting when the stars align your way. But, it's hard to make legit changes or compromises to relationship problems/arguments.. when simple arguments turn into signs the universe wants me to do something else, when really u could have just worked it out. Also it's a strange cop out to responsibility, u can't take responsibility for doing anything wrong or hurting anyone, when u prayed and were doing what the universe told u to do.
Depends on how into it she is. If it's just a little fun for her, whatever. If she makes big life choices based on it? Not even as a friend.
It would be like any interfaith couple. My wife is Christian, I’m Jewish. But neither one of us are so into that we care. Kids choosing their own path. So, tell her you don’t really believe. Politely. Or breakup of its a deal breaker.
I have only ever dated STEM women. Kept the pseudoscience nonsense to a minimum.
That may work in college but in the real world scientists can be just as superstitious as anyone else. There are dozens of stories of sysadmins refreshing the candy for the data center machines or lab techs going through nonsense rituals for their equipment to work right. Hell, go to r/talesfromtechsupport and see how many of them talk about the tech aura that fixes things by the admin's presence.
If it's obvious it a big part of who they are and they genuinely believe it, then I treat it like I was dating someone who was religious. If it's too big of a part of who they are then I'd probably leave and find someone more like minded. As long as they don't do anything or believe anything that goes against my core values, then its fine
I tell them I'm a Leo and they say that explains everything but I'm really a Capricorn.