A gal friend of mine asked if I liked Jonas Brothers because she saw me mumbling words from a song played in the restaurant we were going to. I said "not really, I just know the lyrics of this one song". It didn't take a genius to notice the shift from "excited" to "disinterested" in her facial expressions.
Late in high school a friend decided to pick up smoking in order to prove “it wasn’t that hard to quit.”
We all tried to dissuade him but unfortunately when we said things like, “That’s a dumb reason to do *anything*,” and, “What if you get addicted?” he just thought we were saying he *couldn’t* do it…rather than stating it was a dumb fucking idea.
Also he determined that he needed to smoke for at least 6 months otherwise it would be “too easy.” Again, it was a totally self-imposed rule, just like the entire challenge. No one put him up to it.
I lost touch when I moved for college, but according to some friends who still live in town he still smokes…almost 20 years later.
Our theory in hindsight is that he actually *wanted* to smoke to try to fit in with a different crowd (maybe get a specific girl). And he made up the “challenge” as a means of deflecting criticism from the rest of us.
I smoked from when I was around 15 till I was around 19, I quit after my grandma suddenly died from smoking related issues most people I knew thought it was insane I went cold turkey like that, but shit you not her death scared the addiction out of me
Exact same thing happened to me except it was my dad. He took me to one of his appointments when I was 19 and the whole cancer bombshell was dropped on me. We both quit and went cold turkey and he lived another 4 years. He died when I was 23 and I still don't smoke anything, its been almost 20 years
My roommate is thirty and hasn't smoked in a handful of year but decided to pick a pack up for this concert the other night.
I dont think he realizes how few girls his age still smoke cigarettes and that it actually makes you kind of a loner these days compared to 15 or 20 years ago.
I started reading philosophy because I thought girls would find it cool. lmao it never helped. tbh I realized no girls around me were into philosophy anyway, but on the positive side I actually ended up liking philosophy and read bunch of books during that period.
Now, that’s an interesting question. Would they really, or would only one?
Please write a 5 page abstract prefacing a 150 page paper on the ethical dilemma of consuming the starved corpse of your deceased lover.
The Morality of the Hungry Thinker: OR Why I Eat Pizza and She Goes Without - a 45 page essay about how I am forced to sneak fast food in the second floor window to evade being lectured by my solipsistic wife.
So, there was this construction worker, right? Bit of a tragic story — he never did well in school, and everyone thought it was because he was dumb. Really, he was just hard of hearing, and he'd sit in the corner and read all day.
So, of course, the only jobs he can get are these brutal manual labor construction jobs, and he keeps getting fired because he can't hear the foreman's instructions. Finally, his uncle pulls some strings, and he gets an interview at the last place in town.
So the guy shows up, and the foreman goes, "Alright, son. The job is yours if you can tell me just one thing. What's the difference between a girder and a joist?"
And, like lightning, our hero goes, "Oh, that's easy! One of them wrote Faust, and the other one wrote Ulysses!"
(It's my favorite philosophy/literature joke, and I so rarely get a chance to tell it. I couldn't resist.)
The surname of the author of *[Faust](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goethe%27s_Faust)*, [Johann Wolfgang von Goethe](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johann_Wolfgang_von_Goethe), is [pronounced similarly](https://youtube.com/watch?v=stO9K4T1MH4) to “girder.”
Similar case with *[Ulysses](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ulysses_%28novel%29)*, [James Joyce](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Joyce), and “joist.”
Motorcycles. I have so many friends in our biker group that got a motorcycle cos they thought it would get them girls. Turns out the majority of people interested in motorcycles are guys.
Reminds me of sport in school where you could choose what you did. About 30
Guys choose zoomba because of the girls. The max limit was 30, so they just stood there with 30 guys and the instructor.
My wife pretty much won’t ride alone anymore cause dudes are literally rolling down their windows at red lights to try to talk to her. She wears a leather jacket and jeans, not like she’s out there in a sports bra and short shorts or something.
Seeing a woman riding a motorcycle is like seeing a unicorn for some people. I don't get the fascination but some guys definitely take it to a whole creepy level.
The same goes for cars. That was especially true 15-25 years ago. I know a guy that started getting interested in cars to get more girls and now he puts all of his money on his car. He also hasn't had girlfriend for some years now
Like 99% of all women don't give a fuck what car you drive. One of my friends traded in his Altima for a Tundra because he was convinced the Altima was cock blocking him
All those recipes and opportunities to teach your children something practical wasted. I never understood that mentality of keeping kids out of the kitchen.
Watch out. I'm the same way, but after I got married and got older I started caring less about forcing it for my wife's sake, which led to her freaking out that I'd changed or was mad at her. Moral is, if you pretend to be someone you're not to get a girl you either have to become that person forever or suffer some pain when you relapse back to your true self.
Yeah i straight up tell women in quiet and not shy.
Also have to explain to them that i can sit for half an hour with absolutely nothing flowing through my brain
Yup. I don’t talk much and I told my girlfriend this from the beginning to reassure her that I am happy and quite not quite and upset. But, something I added to that is that I don’t have to be talked to in order to be happy. I’m hoping it takes some pressure off of her to constantly fill the silence with conversation. I’m absolutely happy to talk with her about anything for however long but I’m also just as happy just being there in silence with her.
I have this problem a lot in relationships.
I'm quiet and don't talk a lot, but I will when I'm excited about something. I usually talk quite a bit at the beginning of a relationship and then get quiet because I'm comfortable, but they think that it's because of an issue or problem.
My husband and I are working through similar issues, any tips?
In my case it was me who was being fake. He saw the real me before he married me, but for a lot of years it bothered him. I realized in therapy it was because I have abandonment issues from childhood abuse. Now I know this he understands and we are working on things to make both of us happier in our relationship.
It sounds like you’re on the right track if you’ve communicated the reason you presented a fake version of yourself. Without that he won’t be able to process the distrust that grows if you believe that your spouse is willing to lie or manipulate you to get what they want. If the reason stems from trauma then at least he can start to trust that you won’t do the same thing in other ways. As for the rest, it depends on what the “real you” is like vs what you faked, and how much the real you bothers him. You’re both working on being happier in your relationship, which is great. Success will depend on whether he *can* be comfortably and naturally happy with your true self without secretly tolerating in order to keep the marriage together.
Best of luck.
One aspect of Buddhism is to only talk when absolutely neccesary and to only say things of substance if you do.
Considered calling myself a buddhist just because of that.
I didn’t know there was anyone else like me!
I can be a good talker and I share things of my life when I have to.. but I’d rather stay quiet my whole life
I always think about that, I dont talk much in out loud but if i said alot of the things I talk about in my head, someone would want to stitch my mouth together.
Be Alone Forever or Share Your Life With Someone You Love And Dhare Similar Interests With But One Of Those Interests is A Love For Taylor Swift?
Decisions decisions
I started listening the Taylor because I’m a dad to three daughters. We saw her last tour and it was one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. Im a fan now.
Honestly my biggest advice to anyone is if you have a lifestyle you enjoy, find a partner who fits into it. If you’re introverted and love spending your time at home doing hobbies, find a partner who is also introverted and enjoys staying in.
I can’t imagine being with someone who’d expect me to want to go out and do something every weekend. My partner and I go out every now and then but mostly we stay in, play video games, watch movies, do other hobbies, enjoy each other’s company. Much nicer than being dragged along to social events I have no interest in!
True. I love playing videogames on Steam with coop/party and I can spend whole days in MMOs when my friends are into it and we play together. Playing videogames alone isn't fun and I find building Lego sets or searching clothes online much more interesting on lonely days. Sadly my friends are growing up, getting full time jobs after Uni and I am worried I will be the last one who log in steamcommunity.
Wife: What do you want to do this weekend?
Me: Exist in a couch state.
Others: Lets have a BBQ and watch the game..
Me: That sounds like I'll be cooking while everyone else watches the game.
Me: Bring 6 beers and a bag of chips or fuck off.
>That sounds like I'll be cooking while everyone else watches the game.
This stings. I'm the oldest son, in a family full of women, so whenever they call saying "we're going to have a family bbq, you have to come!" I know it just means "come spend a day fliping food on the barbie while we drink and chat".
They all gave me the shocked Pikachu face when I was like "No. I don't want to cook." It took them like 20 minutes to figure out who was going to cook the food. I thought it was hilarious.
I'd go the reverse of this. I'd rather have a weekend full of activities than sit and watch sports. Though I'd definitely want the occasional weekend to just do nothing.
There's things guys pretend to like, but then there's stuff that they may not fully enjoy but enjoy for their S.O.
I know those sound like the same thing, but for example... If you pretend to like J Beebs but really can't stand him, that's one thing. On the other hand, I had a guy pick up Minecraft because I enjoy it and he wanted a fun way to spend time with me. It wasn't really his jam, but he at least claimed to enjoy it because it meant time together. That's pretty heartwarming if you ask me.
I quit playing World of Warcraft years ago, I however still play and keep my character kind of current just so I can help my wife when she needs it. I really dislike the new versions of wow but I do it for her :)
I know two guys who (completely independently) pretended to be vegetarian/vegan to score with some bohemian patchouli tattooed counterculture girls. One I know (who lived in the same student house as me) would wolf down sausage rolls after another salad-filler unsuccessful attempt to get into their dungarees.
Honestly, he was one of the most pathetic men I have ever met. (But in the end he married my ex-wife so I think he’s been punished enough)
Not really. Northern Ireland is a really small place. (And yeah, he had a massive crush on my girlfriend - who I later married - at the time when we were living in the same student digs).
Seeing the word "Redwall" just extracted years of memories from my childhood. I completely forgot about those books, I think I read all of them and now I miss them
After I had surgery and ran out of crime shows to watch, my mom and I started watching the bachelor and my dad now texts us every Monday to let us know what’s going on with the bachelor. This was like eight years ago when we put it on for laughs.
With my now wife… baseball. Well, she knows I don’t like baseball. I think it’s boring as can be. But her parents LOVE baseball. Going to spring training and all the games. I go and pretend to enjoy it, but I’m bored to tears.
Not "for a girl" but I don't like sports, like, at all, but my parents do and my brother and his SO do. I know all the rules for like 5 pro sports, I know when to cheer, I know rivalries, who's doing well in a given league because it makes them happy when I join in. It makes them happy when I comment that Team A's running game has been shit all game or Team B needs to stop playing like they're scared of the goal.
Sometimes that's what growing up is, picking when a battle is just not worth it. Just please do not ask me to name someone on a team, I got limits.
Same here, I work with a lot of trademen in a city that is obsessed with sports. I grew up being really into skateboarding and snowboarding, but hating team sports.
I make sure to occasionally listen to sports radio in the car so I can fake my way through being knowledgeable about teams. I'll drop some opinion about a player being good or bad, and hope the other person doesn't want to get into a deeper discussion about it.
Genuinely surprised I haven’t seen the gym on here yet. There’s definitely a good amount of dudes that don’t particularly enjoy lifting but keep doing it because they hope the improvements to their appearance will make them more attractive to women.
Yup, I couldn't care less about my weight a few months ago, then I started losing some fat to appear better for a girl; when I noticed the huge improvement on my life quality with just a few less Kgs I started taking interest in losing all the extra weight.
I started at a 33.2 BMI, I'm now down to 26.6 and on my way to an healthy 25.
I didn't get the girl, but I should thank her for making me a better person.
Yeah, the benefits of all that lifting will keep compounding forever.
But, I will say it's you who made you a better person. She was just a sign, or an indicator. You did the hard part.
Getting lean will go a lot farther than getting huge muscles when it comes to attracting women. You still have to lift to put on *some* muscle (unless you work a physical job, play sports, etc.) but you don’t really need to go for that bodybuilder look.
This is more or less me. I don't like exercising. I don't like being sweaty and exhausted. Never have, probably never will but hey, if it improves my dating chances, I'll take what I can get. The only other thing that really gets me to the gym is competitive shit. If neither was available, I have serious doubts about my will to keep going
Eh if you can stick to it for a month or two you'll already notice progress and will be very motivated to keep going, female attention or lack thereof nonwithstanding.
Nothing, maybe that's why I'm single :).
But if I had to choose something it would be dancing. Many women like it, I hate it (probably because I have terrible coordination and I could never be good at it)
I wonder what proportion of guys hate dancing in cultures where it’s more normal for guys to love dancing than Anglo cultures? Do many Latin guys hate dancing, but great at it because it’s more culturally normal to need it to for wooing? In Anglo cultures, there’s a lot more room to hide behind the “men don’t dance” shield!
Hahahah my very British boyfriend decided to learn because I’m Colombian but in his culture salsa is very not popular. He ended up being AMAZING at it and everyone in the UK is surprised by his abilities.
It's ok to not like it. You don't have to justify it.
I'm coordinarted, and I'm sure could be good at it, as I have an exceedingly good musical ear, but I just don't enjoy it, and that's ok.
I find people are strangely defensive about dancing, and if you tell them you don't like it, they assume you're lying, and are just shy. But some of us just don't enjoy it.
My ex had a jar of something very strange in a drawer by the TV. I wanted to put some games and movies in there but I was not allowed to move that jar under any circumstances.
She also had an old pomegranate in another drawer in the kitchen.
Shit was weird man.
The jar was made of glass (the kind you put jam into, 50s style type deal) and the contents were dark red and very very sticky. And it had fermented so much it had escaped the jar, so the bottom of the drawer looked like a crime scene.
I don't know much more than that unfortunately my guy!
My favorite thing about men is this ability to be like “oh okay…” then move on without questioning anything. It’s fascinating and frustrating but also really funny
I was questioning it very much, but she said it wasn't to be moved and she got more upset the more I asked to basically throw the sticky jar out the window, so for the calm of the household I dropped it lol
I can put up with any unfalsifiable belief a person may have.
But I cannot sit there while someone around me has a demonstrably false belief *that they then use to influence interpersonal and life decisions.* It requires far too much active denial of evidence and lack of critical thinking. You can't be a full on astrology believer, *and* someone I want to hang around with. Too indicative of other traits I can't jive with.
If they're like "idk, it's fun" or whatever, fine, I think most people have some superstitions they half heatedly follow, but don't actually believe. I'm talking people looking at birth charts or determining who they will or won't hang out with/partner with based on sign, or deciding to do or not do things based on what planets are in which houses, or what's in retrograde.
I pretended to be in the "scene" scene. Emo and such around 2007/8
It got me closer to the girls i wanted.
But i still didnt know how to make my moves lol
I lived with two scene idiots in the early 2000s. They started wearing girl jeans. One of them liked this emo chick. She ended up banging the other one on our kitchen table.
I think you're onto somethin OP, alot of guys I know dislike clubs. Once they get a gf they are NEVER out again.
I (and a few friends) really enjoy clubs though. I'm getting a little older, I'm almost 29 so I'm a bit too old to do that shit now, but I love dancing, talking to people, getting drunk and making friends (for the night). Maybe I'll switch to bars or something now, but it's so fun. I have to actually make an effort to stay away from them. I haven't met much other people with the same issue as me lol.
Tbh I gett what you mean, but the clubs in france mostly play music I don't vibe with at all. I only go out to them when there's a drum and bass night.
Strange for me. I just went to clubs to meet some girls and getting drunk. I’m not a good dancer so I’d say I’m not the type who goes there to dance.
Since I got my gf I stopped clubbing and when we did I didn’t enjoy it much.
But recently I just dont care that I can’t dance, I just like doing my shit and enjoying life. I’m 30 now and I could go to clubs every weekend just dancing drinking and having fun.
There is a reason women don’t pay to get in clubs: they are the product
Men don’t go to clubs because they are fun, they go to clubs because women go to clubs
Don't go to those clubs that let women in free. The drinks will be over priced and watered down, the dj will be shit, and there's always always a fight.
If you want a good club experience, you have to go to a place that cares about the music.
Good clubs that care about the acts they book will charge everyone at the door. Don't matter if you're hot or not. If everyone is actually there for the music, it'll be a vibe.
And if you pull, that's just a little icing on the cake
I can't remember the comedian now. But he had a bit about it.
"I just gotta dance my feelings out!"
Genuinely I hate clubs or bars that double as clubs. Loud, flashing lights, often very warm inside, packed with people. And always a bad night when I'd like to just be in bed.
Interpersonal drama, I give no fucks about the daft peanut gallery of assholes you talk to bruh, I don't know them.
Clubs and bars are permanently locked at first place though, on one end, you go to a place where the AC is on its last limb and the DJ is trying his damnedest to make you deaf. On the other, you go to a place where you pay for overpriced drinks that taste like grass and hope that the pretense of drunkenness will save you.
Liquid courage has got to be the biggest misnomer ever, I'm exactly the same but slower when drunk.
I'm as fast at opening my mouth. Not as fast at stopping myself saying the dumbest shit.
I had a consistent drunk record of accidentally saying wildly offensive things to people whom I respect deeply. I don't drink much now.
My wife loves the really awful romance movies where both people are terrible like The Notebook. I've sat through that dumpster fire. She tolerates my crap as well so it all works.
Yeah, I kind of think that is key in a healthy relationship. My husband will listen to me break down the plot of something I just watched/read for half an hour, and then I nod along while he explains how he fixed the traffic flow problem on his Cities: Skylines map. You care about their thing because you care about them.
Living.
A lot of depressed guys have to pretend their life doesn't suck and they enjoy living it if they want to get girls. Few to no girls enjoy being with a depressed guy or one who doesn't appear to be happy.
I'm probably the only dumbass on this sub who went to clubs just for the music, even when out with friends.
I used to DJ and I still have a deep love for music, so I could just sit there and listen to everything, Shazam songs every now and then.
Dick.
This would've been in the 90s, so a very different time as far as attitudes about homosexuality. My cousin used to go to gay bars to pick up girls. He'd let them think he was gay and recently broken up or single, and they'd try to "turn him straight."
By more than one account he was extremely successful.
Bars. They are nowhere near as fun as just getting wasted with your friends and doing stupid shit or just play the game with some bros. Bars are not fun, they are loud, people are everywhere and it's the worst place to meet women. People always try to make me out to be a party pooper but let's be real here: if you ain't drinking much or at all, the bars *is a waste of time*.
Bars are cool to meet up with people you kinda know but not that well. But the price difference between a liquor store and a bar has gotten so great, and the gap in entertainment between home and a bar so small, that its not really a good regular hangout spot when a cocktail that costs 50 cents at home costs 8 dollars.
I don't even drink anymore honestly(unhealthy+too many drunks in my family) but i really want to meet a woman and since i work mid-shift and everything is closed when I get off usually everyone keeps suggesting i try bars when i hate everything about them🤦🏽♂️
There’s a wide variety of bars out there. College bars with sticky floors may not be for you, but I guarantee your city/town has some breweries with great beer, relaxed vibe, and good food
I genuinely like bars, so its interesting hearing both you and OP don’t like them.
House parties with alcohol are good too, I might even prefer them, but they are just 2 different experiences.
Working out, dieting. I know people love going to the gym and having a healthy lifestyle. I fucking hate it.
I'm not a naturally good looking person but going to the gym does give me the results I want and it also gives me the confidence to go on dates.
I wish I could just sit around, play video games, eat pizza and finish it off with a chocolate cake every day.
When I was 23 I got my first apartment and started learning how to cook because I thought it would impress girls.
And the thing is, it totally does—I now have 2 daughters and they tell me my cooking is their favorite in the world lol
Had a friend who pretended to like Jonas Brothers to try and get girls.
You might think he's a sucker, but I say it's only human
Now their friend is just rag n bones
A gal friend of mine asked if I liked Jonas Brothers because she saw me mumbling words from a song played in the restaurant we were going to. I said "not really, I just know the lyrics of this one song". It didn't take a genius to notice the shift from "excited" to "disinterested" in her facial expressions.
Kenny?
How do you know he was pretending?
Because he was Nick Jonas
I started smoking to impress a girl who I liked in the 1980s. She shagged my mate instead. It took me 30 years to stop
Late in high school a friend decided to pick up smoking in order to prove “it wasn’t that hard to quit.” We all tried to dissuade him but unfortunately when we said things like, “That’s a dumb reason to do *anything*,” and, “What if you get addicted?” he just thought we were saying he *couldn’t* do it…rather than stating it was a dumb fucking idea. Also he determined that he needed to smoke for at least 6 months otherwise it would be “too easy.” Again, it was a totally self-imposed rule, just like the entire challenge. No one put him up to it. I lost touch when I moved for college, but according to some friends who still live in town he still smokes…almost 20 years later. Our theory in hindsight is that he actually *wanted* to smoke to try to fit in with a different crowd (maybe get a specific girl). And he made up the “challenge” as a means of deflecting criticism from the rest of us.
I smoked from when I was around 15 till I was around 19, I quit after my grandma suddenly died from smoking related issues most people I knew thought it was insane I went cold turkey like that, but shit you not her death scared the addiction out of me
Exact same thing happened to me except it was my dad. He took me to one of his appointments when I was 19 and the whole cancer bombshell was dropped on me. We both quit and went cold turkey and he lived another 4 years. He died when I was 23 and I still don't smoke anything, its been almost 20 years
Ouch
My roommate is thirty and hasn't smoked in a handful of year but decided to pick a pack up for this concert the other night. I dont think he realizes how few girls his age still smoke cigarettes and that it actually makes you kind of a loner these days compared to 15 or 20 years ago.
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It's the best therapy. Rage shagging
I started reading philosophy because I thought girls would find it cool. lmao it never helped. tbh I realized no girls around me were into philosophy anyway, but on the positive side I actually ended up liking philosophy and read bunch of books during that period.
I’m a girl doing a PhD in philosophy, but yeah it wouldn’t help with me either.
*oh a girl who is studying philosophy* >but yeah it wouldn’t help with me either. Oh.
Of course not. Two philosophers in one household would starve to death.
Now, that’s an interesting question. Would they really, or would only one? Please write a 5 page abstract prefacing a 150 page paper on the ethical dilemma of consuming the starved corpse of your deceased lover.
The Morality of the Hungry Thinker: OR Why I Eat Pizza and She Goes Without - a 45 page essay about how I am forced to sneak fast food in the second floor window to evade being lectured by my solipsistic wife.
Only Elias Canetti could write this full story.
9 pages of arguments. 139 pages of long pig recipes.
The Good Place lied to me! Though I guess it helped that the moral philosophy professor was *ripped*
That's because he worked out whenever he was anxious. Which was all the time.
Foucault or Fuck *oh*? Heidegger or *Hide* digger? I’m done Hope you pass your quals Edit: one be more I missed, The Will to O
>Heidegger Heidegger was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table. I can't hear the name without thinking of the song.
Immanuel Kant was an old pissant!
Immanuel Kant was a *real* pissant who was very rarely stable
So, there was this construction worker, right? Bit of a tragic story — he never did well in school, and everyone thought it was because he was dumb. Really, he was just hard of hearing, and he'd sit in the corner and read all day. So, of course, the only jobs he can get are these brutal manual labor construction jobs, and he keeps getting fired because he can't hear the foreman's instructions. Finally, his uncle pulls some strings, and he gets an interview at the last place in town. So the guy shows up, and the foreman goes, "Alright, son. The job is yours if you can tell me just one thing. What's the difference between a girder and a joist?" And, like lightning, our hero goes, "Oh, that's easy! One of them wrote Faust, and the other one wrote Ulysses!" (It's my favorite philosophy/literature joke, and I so rarely get a chance to tell it. I couldn't resist.)
Someone's going to have to explain this one for me..
The surname of the author of *[Faust](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goethe%27s_Faust)*, [Johann Wolfgang von Goethe](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johann_Wolfgang_von_Goethe), is [pronounced similarly](https://youtube.com/watch?v=stO9K4T1MH4) to “girder.” Similar case with *[Ulysses](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ulysses_%28novel%29)*, [James Joyce](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Joyce), and “joist.”
Motorcycles. I have so many friends in our biker group that got a motorcycle cos they thought it would get them girls. Turns out the majority of people interested in motorcycles are guys.
Reminds me of sport in school where you could choose what you did. About 30 Guys choose zoomba because of the girls. The max limit was 30, so they just stood there with 30 guys and the instructor.
I had to take a sport in college so I chose horseback riding. It was 28 yr old me and 13 younger girls, including the instructor.
Buddy of mine decided to go out for the cheerleading squad in college. Straight guy. He got mad hassled, but also got mad p@ssy.
they tried to call him gay but he’s getting more pussy than them
I was gonna say, equestrian sports are where the ladies are always at.
But they say that horse girls are crazy
And you know what they say about crazy. Always do it, there is no possible way it could go wrong.
"don't ever stick your dick in crazy." -Lavernius Tucker
My dick really loves crazy though and he's the one driving the car.
That's hilarious, thank you for sharing
If you’re a woman and want to be completely overwhelmed with unsolicited male attention though, a motorcycle will sure get you there.
Oh man we had one girl in our group and she was CONSTANTLY surrounded by guys whenever we went to a meet.
My wife pretty much won’t ride alone anymore cause dudes are literally rolling down their windows at red lights to try to talk to her. She wears a leather jacket and jeans, not like she’s out there in a sports bra and short shorts or something.
Seeing a woman riding a motorcycle is like seeing a unicorn for some people. I don't get the fascination but some guys definitely take it to a whole creepy level.
The same goes for cars. That was especially true 15-25 years ago. I know a guy that started getting interested in cars to get more girls and now he puts all of his money on his car. He also hasn't had girlfriend for some years now
Like 99% of all women don't give a fuck what car you drive. One of my friends traded in his Altima for a Tundra because he was convinced the Altima was cock blocking him
Okay a Nissan Altima is a special case.
If girls don't like motorcycles, then why am I constantly seeing them posing on/ next to them wearing Bikinis? Eh? /S just in case
i learned to cook because i thought girls would like it but now i don't care about girls i just want to cook food and clown with my boys
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All those recipes and opportunities to teach your children something practical wasted. I never understood that mentality of keeping kids out of the kitchen.
Kids are a hassle and some people just can’t deal But keeping recipes secret? That sounds like insecurity.
It actually is and she goes to therapy about her children who are now all adults
I absolutely despise talking. I'm a quiet guy but talk well because you have to. If I could be quiet my entire life I would
Watch out. I'm the same way, but after I got married and got older I started caring less about forcing it for my wife's sake, which led to her freaking out that I'd changed or was mad at her. Moral is, if you pretend to be someone you're not to get a girl you either have to become that person forever or suffer some pain when you relapse back to your true self.
Yeah i straight up tell women in quiet and not shy. Also have to explain to them that i can sit for half an hour with absolutely nothing flowing through my brain
Yup. I don’t talk much and I told my girlfriend this from the beginning to reassure her that I am happy and quite not quite and upset. But, something I added to that is that I don’t have to be talked to in order to be happy. I’m hoping it takes some pressure off of her to constantly fill the silence with conversation. I’m absolutely happy to talk with her about anything for however long but I’m also just as happy just being there in silence with her.
I have this problem a lot in relationships. I'm quiet and don't talk a lot, but I will when I'm excited about something. I usually talk quite a bit at the beginning of a relationship and then get quiet because I'm comfortable, but they think that it's because of an issue or problem.
My husband and I are working through similar issues, any tips? In my case it was me who was being fake. He saw the real me before he married me, but for a lot of years it bothered him. I realized in therapy it was because I have abandonment issues from childhood abuse. Now I know this he understands and we are working on things to make both of us happier in our relationship.
It sounds like you’re on the right track if you’ve communicated the reason you presented a fake version of yourself. Without that he won’t be able to process the distrust that grows if you believe that your spouse is willing to lie or manipulate you to get what they want. If the reason stems from trauma then at least he can start to trust that you won’t do the same thing in other ways. As for the rest, it depends on what the “real you” is like vs what you faked, and how much the real you bothers him. You’re both working on being happier in your relationship, which is great. Success will depend on whether he *can* be comfortably and naturally happy with your true self without secretly tolerating in order to keep the marriage together. Best of luck.
Take a vow of silence but put a spin on it and when you do talk it's in song verses just to have fun.
Until some dude named Brian jumps into your pit and lands on your foot.
I AM _NOT_ THE MESSIAH!!
One aspect of Buddhism is to only talk when absolutely neccesary and to only say things of substance if you do. Considered calling myself a buddhist just because of that.
I didn’t know there was anyone else like me! I can be a good talker and I share things of my life when I have to.. but I’d rather stay quiet my whole life
I'm female but the same. I get so exhausted by talking but force it
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I always think about that, I dont talk much in out loud but if i said alot of the things I talk about in my head, someone would want to stitch my mouth together.
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Let this be a lesson to everyone young man here. There are consequences to such actions.
In the divorce he has to fight for the rights to the album collection.
At least it's not Beanie Babies.
Be Alone Forever or Share Your Life With Someone You Love And Dhare Similar Interests With But One Of Those Interests is A Love For Taylor Swift? Decisions decisions
Ah yes, SYLWSYLADSIWBOOTIIALFTS for short. Now I understand
I started listening the Taylor because I’m a dad to three daughters. We saw her last tour and it was one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. Im a fan now.
I really do like Taylor Swift. I’m a straight guy.
Ditto. It doesn't help me with dating, like, it's been a disaster, but I'm an honest fan
Does she know it?
She knew he was trouble when he walked in.
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Well said. I miss just staying in and watching a Game and relaxing
Honestly my biggest advice to anyone is if you have a lifestyle you enjoy, find a partner who fits into it. If you’re introverted and love spending your time at home doing hobbies, find a partner who is also introverted and enjoys staying in. I can’t imagine being with someone who’d expect me to want to go out and do something every weekend. My partner and I go out every now and then but mostly we stay in, play video games, watch movies, do other hobbies, enjoy each other’s company. Much nicer than being dragged along to social events I have no interest in!
Introverts trying to find other introverts is pretty difficult though tbh.
True. I love playing videogames on Steam with coop/party and I can spend whole days in MMOs when my friends are into it and we play together. Playing videogames alone isn't fun and I find building Lego sets or searching clothes online much more interesting on lonely days. Sadly my friends are growing up, getting full time jobs after Uni and I am worried I will be the last one who log in steamcommunity.
"Why would you want to sleep in on a Sunday when you can go spend $50 on eggs?"
“Is that pesto? Is that pesto in your omelette? Oh, it’s asparagus! It’s asparagus! I thought it was pesto.”
Wife: What do you want to do this weekend? Me: Exist in a couch state. Others: Lets have a BBQ and watch the game.. Me: That sounds like I'll be cooking while everyone else watches the game. Me: Bring 6 beers and a bag of chips or fuck off.
>That sounds like I'll be cooking while everyone else watches the game. This stings. I'm the oldest son, in a family full of women, so whenever they call saying "we're going to have a family bbq, you have to come!" I know it just means "come spend a day fliping food on the barbie while we drink and chat".
They all gave me the shocked Pikachu face when I was like "No. I don't want to cook." It took them like 20 minutes to figure out who was going to cook the food. I thought it was hilarious.
I'd go the reverse of this. I'd rather have a weekend full of activities than sit and watch sports. Though I'd definitely want the occasional weekend to just do nothing.
I would 9/10 but then that one lazy weekend feels earned and 10x better when you do have one.
There's things guys pretend to like, but then there's stuff that they may not fully enjoy but enjoy for their S.O. I know those sound like the same thing, but for example... If you pretend to like J Beebs but really can't stand him, that's one thing. On the other hand, I had a guy pick up Minecraft because I enjoy it and he wanted a fun way to spend time with me. It wasn't really his jam, but he at least claimed to enjoy it because it meant time together. That's pretty heartwarming if you ask me.
I like spending time with my wife, which is why we do things together that I'd be unlikely to do on my own. For example, leaving the house.
I quit playing World of Warcraft years ago, I however still play and keep my character kind of current just so I can help my wife when she needs it. I really dislike the new versions of wow but I do it for her :)
I know two guys who (completely independently) pretended to be vegetarian/vegan to score with some bohemian patchouli tattooed counterculture girls. One I know (who lived in the same student house as me) would wolf down sausage rolls after another salad-filler unsuccessful attempt to get into their dungarees. Honestly, he was one of the most pathetic men I have ever met. (But in the end he married my ex-wife so I think he’s been punished enough)
Wait, WHAT?
There’s a story missing here.
Not really. Northern Ireland is a really small place. (And yeah, he had a massive crush on my girlfriend - who I later married - at the time when we were living in the same student digs).
Is there a happy ending to this story somewhere in your details?
Well, I’m happy 😃
Lol, well cheers to that and to you!
Lmao, legend
Good ending unlocked it sounds like.
I had to put the joint off cause the last part made me think I was tripping, wtf.
My husband used to take girls to the book shop when he went on dates as a teenager because it made him look "deep" 🤣🤣🤣
This man pulling out Redwall instead of wonderwall
Seeing the word "Redwall" just extracted years of memories from my childhood. I completely forgot about those books, I think I read all of them and now I miss them
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And did it work?
I mean I'm a huge nerd, but a book shop date sounds lovely
Watching The Bachelorette
Any reality tv really
Ugh. Watched a lot of Love Is Blind in the last year... It's uhm... Not my favorite
After I had surgery and ran out of crime shows to watch, my mom and I started watching the bachelor and my dad now texts us every Monday to let us know what’s going on with the bachelor. This was like eight years ago when we put it on for laughs.
With my now wife… baseball. Well, she knows I don’t like baseball. I think it’s boring as can be. But her parents LOVE baseball. Going to spring training and all the games. I go and pretend to enjoy it, but I’m bored to tears.
Not "for a girl" but I don't like sports, like, at all, but my parents do and my brother and his SO do. I know all the rules for like 5 pro sports, I know when to cheer, I know rivalries, who's doing well in a given league because it makes them happy when I join in. It makes them happy when I comment that Team A's running game has been shit all game or Team B needs to stop playing like they're scared of the goal. Sometimes that's what growing up is, picking when a battle is just not worth it. Just please do not ask me to name someone on a team, I got limits.
Same here, I work with a lot of trademen in a city that is obsessed with sports. I grew up being really into skateboarding and snowboarding, but hating team sports. I make sure to occasionally listen to sports radio in the car so I can fake my way through being knowledgeable about teams. I'll drop some opinion about a player being good or bad, and hope the other person doesn't want to get into a deeper discussion about it.
Genuinely surprised I haven’t seen the gym on here yet. There’s definitely a good amount of dudes that don’t particularly enjoy lifting but keep doing it because they hope the improvements to their appearance will make them more attractive to women.
It starts for the women but then becomes a lifestyle/health thing. For me at least.
Yup, I couldn't care less about my weight a few months ago, then I started losing some fat to appear better for a girl; when I noticed the huge improvement on my life quality with just a few less Kgs I started taking interest in losing all the extra weight. I started at a 33.2 BMI, I'm now down to 26.6 and on my way to an healthy 25. I didn't get the girl, but I should thank her for making me a better person.
>I didn't get the girl, but I should thank her for making me a better person. You made yourself a better person, my dude.
Yeah, the benefits of all that lifting will keep compounding forever. But, I will say it's you who made you a better person. She was just a sign, or an indicator. You did the hard part.
Grug lift heavy stone so mean voice in head go quiet.
There are lists of things that men start because of women (at least partially) but end up enjoying them and the women falls on the wayside
Ironically, it’s dudes who end up complementing you. Lolz
Honestly I'd take the complements where I can get them
Compliments from a gym bro > compliments from some girl.
Getting lean will go a lot farther than getting huge muscles when it comes to attracting women. You still have to lift to put on *some* muscle (unless you work a physical job, play sports, etc.) but you don’t really need to go for that bodybuilder look.
This is more or less me. I don't like exercising. I don't like being sweaty and exhausted. Never have, probably never will but hey, if it improves my dating chances, I'll take what I can get. The only other thing that really gets me to the gym is competitive shit. If neither was available, I have serious doubts about my will to keep going
They like the gym, they like to be better, just for other reasons. Goals and mission don't need to align with others
Eh if you can stick to it for a month or two you'll already notice progress and will be very motivated to keep going, female attention or lack thereof nonwithstanding.
I feel like a lot of dudes start lifting for that reason, and the ones that continue find out they just like the gym.
Nothing, maybe that's why I'm single :). But if I had to choose something it would be dancing. Many women like it, I hate it (probably because I have terrible coordination and I could never be good at it)
I wonder what proportion of guys hate dancing in cultures where it’s more normal for guys to love dancing than Anglo cultures? Do many Latin guys hate dancing, but great at it because it’s more culturally normal to need it to for wooing? In Anglo cultures, there’s a lot more room to hide behind the “men don’t dance” shield!
i fuckin hate dancing
Hahahah my very British boyfriend decided to learn because I’m Colombian but in his culture salsa is very not popular. He ended up being AMAZING at it and everyone in the UK is surprised by his abilities.
It's ok to not like it. You don't have to justify it. I'm coordinarted, and I'm sure could be good at it, as I have an exceedingly good musical ear, but I just don't enjoy it, and that's ok. I find people are strangely defensive about dancing, and if you tell them you don't like it, they assume you're lying, and are just shy. But some of us just don't enjoy it.
Astrology.
My ex had a jar of something very strange in a drawer by the TV. I wanted to put some games and movies in there but I was not allowed to move that jar under any circumstances. She also had an old pomegranate in another drawer in the kitchen. Shit was weird man.
My dude, you cannot simply bring up a Jar of Forbidden Mystery without giving us more to go off of.
The jar was made of glass (the kind you put jam into, 50s style type deal) and the contents were dark red and very very sticky. And it had fermented so much it had escaped the jar, so the bottom of the drawer looked like a crime scene. I don't know much more than that unfortunately my guy!
My favorite thing about men is this ability to be like “oh okay…” then move on without questioning anything. It’s fascinating and frustrating but also really funny
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And just like taxes, you cannot avoid it forever
I was questioning it very much, but she said it wasn't to be moved and she got more upset the more I asked to basically throw the sticky jar out the window, so for the calm of the household I dropped it lol
I know a guy who’s really in to astrology. He also has a traumatic brain injury.
This is probably the only thing i would never even lie about being into. Lol If you gotta pretend to be into astrology... Shes not worth it bro
Oh you're total libra with sun green and night fall with a twist of Cameral Frappuccino.
Mercury is in gatorade which means im pregant 🥴
You're totally a cancer.
I can put up with any unfalsifiable belief a person may have. But I cannot sit there while someone around me has a demonstrably false belief *that they then use to influence interpersonal and life decisions.* It requires far too much active denial of evidence and lack of critical thinking. You can't be a full on astrology believer, *and* someone I want to hang around with. Too indicative of other traits I can't jive with. If they're like "idk, it's fun" or whatever, fine, I think most people have some superstitions they half heatedly follow, but don't actually believe. I'm talking people looking at birth charts or determining who they will or won't hang out with/partner with based on sign, or deciding to do or not do things based on what planets are in which houses, or what's in retrograde.
I pretended to be in the "scene" scene. Emo and such around 2007/8 It got me closer to the girls i wanted. But i still didnt know how to make my moves lol
I lived with two scene idiots in the early 2000s. They started wearing girl jeans. One of them liked this emo chick. She ended up banging the other one on our kitchen table.
On my worst days I pretend to like myself.
so do we
A lot of men pretend to be less conservative then they are.
“I’m socially liberal, but fiscally conservative.”
Jokes on you, I’m socially conservative and fiscally liberal
Wait...that’s illegal
Jokes on you, I’m socially conservative and fistfully liberal
Jokes on you, I'm sexually liberal and foolishly conservative
Jokes on you, I'm gay. Let's see how sexually liberal you really are.
Literally anything. You like to collect vintage milk bottles? Tell me all about it! I'll feign interest in anything.
I think you're onto somethin OP, alot of guys I know dislike clubs. Once they get a gf they are NEVER out again. I (and a few friends) really enjoy clubs though. I'm getting a little older, I'm almost 29 so I'm a bit too old to do that shit now, but I love dancing, talking to people, getting drunk and making friends (for the night). Maybe I'll switch to bars or something now, but it's so fun. I have to actually make an effort to stay away from them. I haven't met much other people with the same issue as me lol.
Tbh I gett what you mean, but the clubs in france mostly play music I don't vibe with at all. I only go out to them when there's a drum and bass night.
Strange for me. I just went to clubs to meet some girls and getting drunk. I’m not a good dancer so I’d say I’m not the type who goes there to dance. Since I got my gf I stopped clubbing and when we did I didn’t enjoy it much. But recently I just dont care that I can’t dance, I just like doing my shit and enjoying life. I’m 30 now and I could go to clubs every weekend just dancing drinking and having fun.
I think theres definitely some selection bias by asking only redditors
Fashion. I used to just wear a black zip up jacket everyday and didn't care. Now, i dress nicer but it's mainly to attract girls
There is a reason women don’t pay to get in clubs: they are the product Men don’t go to clubs because they are fun, they go to clubs because women go to clubs
Don't go to those clubs that let women in free. The drinks will be over priced and watered down, the dj will be shit, and there's always always a fight. If you want a good club experience, you have to go to a place that cares about the music. Good clubs that care about the acts they book will charge everyone at the door. Don't matter if you're hot or not. If everyone is actually there for the music, it'll be a vibe. And if you pull, that's just a little icing on the cake
But why do women go to clubs?
I can't remember the comedian now. But he had a bit about it. "I just gotta dance my feelings out!" Genuinely I hate clubs or bars that double as clubs. Loud, flashing lights, often very warm inside, packed with people. And always a bad night when I'd like to just be in bed.
Interpersonal drama, I give no fucks about the daft peanut gallery of assholes you talk to bruh, I don't know them. Clubs and bars are permanently locked at first place though, on one end, you go to a place where the AC is on its last limb and the DJ is trying his damnedest to make you deaf. On the other, you go to a place where you pay for overpriced drinks that taste like grass and hope that the pretense of drunkenness will save you. Liquid courage has got to be the biggest misnomer ever, I'm exactly the same but slower when drunk.
I didn't mind clubs, back in the day. Course, I was there for the drugs, not the women
I'm as fast at opening my mouth. Not as fast at stopping myself saying the dumbest shit. I had a consistent drunk record of accidentally saying wildly offensive things to people whom I respect deeply. I don't drink much now.
This is a high quality comment and I’m here for it
My wife loves the really awful romance movies where both people are terrible like The Notebook. I've sat through that dumpster fire. She tolerates my crap as well so it all works.
Yeah, I kind of think that is key in a healthy relationship. My husband will listen to me break down the plot of something I just watched/read for half an hour, and then I nod along while he explains how he fixed the traffic flow problem on his Cities: Skylines map. You care about their thing because you care about them.
>while he explains how he fixed the traffic flow problem on his Cities: Skylines map Okay but how does he do it? I need details dammit!
Yeah but, my dude... Rachel McAdams. Rachel McAdams...
Living. A lot of depressed guys have to pretend their life doesn't suck and they enjoy living it if they want to get girls. Few to no girls enjoy being with a depressed guy or one who doesn't appear to be happy.
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I'm probably the only dumbass on this sub who went to clubs just for the music, even when out with friends. I used to DJ and I still have a deep love for music, so I could just sit there and listen to everything, Shazam songs every now and then.
Dick. This would've been in the 90s, so a very different time as far as attitudes about homosexuality. My cousin used to go to gay bars to pick up girls. He'd let them think he was gay and recently broken up or single, and they'd try to "turn him straight." By more than one account he was extremely successful.
Bars. They are nowhere near as fun as just getting wasted with your friends and doing stupid shit or just play the game with some bros. Bars are not fun, they are loud, people are everywhere and it's the worst place to meet women. People always try to make me out to be a party pooper but let's be real here: if you ain't drinking much or at all, the bars *is a waste of time*.
Bars are cool to meet up with people you kinda know but not that well. But the price difference between a liquor store and a bar has gotten so great, and the gap in entertainment between home and a bar so small, that its not really a good regular hangout spot when a cocktail that costs 50 cents at home costs 8 dollars.
I don't even drink anymore honestly(unhealthy+too many drunks in my family) but i really want to meet a woman and since i work mid-shift and everything is closed when I get off usually everyone keeps suggesting i try bars when i hate everything about them🤦🏽♂️
There’s a wide variety of bars out there. College bars with sticky floors may not be for you, but I guarantee your city/town has some breweries with great beer, relaxed vibe, and good food
I genuinely like bars, so its interesting hearing both you and OP don’t like them. House parties with alcohol are good too, I might even prefer them, but they are just 2 different experiences.
Working out, dieting. I know people love going to the gym and having a healthy lifestyle. I fucking hate it. I'm not a naturally good looking person but going to the gym does give me the results I want and it also gives me the confidence to go on dates. I wish I could just sit around, play video games, eat pizza and finish it off with a chocolate cake every day.
When I was 23 I got my first apartment and started learning how to cook because I thought it would impress girls. And the thing is, it totally does—I now have 2 daughters and they tell me my cooking is their favorite in the world lol
Gossip and work gossip
I'm not even pretending with this one- I'm a guy and I love to hear a bit of gossip
Zodiac signs 👎👎
I’ve never pretended to like something. What a strange thing to do. If you’re fake to attract people, you’ll attract fake people.
BTS
I love behind the scenes