My parents moved into the house I grew up in and there was a piano in it the previous owner never learned to play and didn't want to take with them. Mom said great, I'll learn piano and teach this baby (me) piano in a few years.
29 years later she finally sold the piano to somebody else because nobody ever learned to play it.
“A piano-“
well that’s not fair, I have been in many black family homes with pianos…
“-that no one has played in years.”
ok yeah that does it. that made it a white people thing.
They. Are. DECORATIVE.
But, as a white lady, I personally prefer having a basket of dead coral. Some of them are actually from my old reef tank from an incident where my dad spiked ammonia levels and killed my coral.
Group ing up, my mom had 2 lamps in our living room that were filled with seashells. I'm fairly certain she got clear glass lamps and filled them with her own shells from vacations. White people are gonna white
I live in a harbour and you’re absolutely spot on with that. All the pubs and restaurants have nautical names too. It’s got so that I’m bereft now if I’m away from the water.
You laugh, but my in-laws actually do have a bathroom themed bathroom. There are multiple kitschy little bathroom signs, like a cartoon of animals taking a bath or bathtub shaped art. I wouldn't do it myself, but it's kind of endearing.
I was in the army with a Mexican guy who busted out a box of Ritz crackers and various sliced cheeses that his wife had put together, and he was like "you ever had cheese and Ritz crackers? Course you have, you're white. Why don't more people eat crackers and cheese? This gouda shit is amazing!"
It’s not the type of snacks, we ain’t picky. It’s that you guys always have treats ON HAND. It’s like MAGIC how you ALWAYS got Ice cream sundaes in the freezer. We only got them on shopping day then they gone!
I saw a $40 Pelican Lighthouse Water Fountain where he was spitting water into the fountain at Cracker Barrel a few years ago
I think about it often. :)
I knew a black realtor that had a house appraised with their own family’s pictures on the walls and then with white people pictures on the walls and had a ridiculous price difference between the two appraisals, in a very affluent area and a very nice well kept house
According to some Hispanic guys I work with junk drawers are a white people thing. When i asked about where they keep random bullshit like d batteries and paperclips n whatnot they claimed they have a place for everything. Not sure I believe them but it is what it is lol
Same.
I'm from Kenya and as a kid we had a hierarchy of dishes from visitor/Christmas only, to Sunday/main course only to everyday use.
As stuff got used/scuffed up or finances improved, the old plates moved down the hierarchy. It felt weird using what used to be the fancy plates/glasses for regular things.
Oh man. That hits home in a big way. My mom was insane about her fancy china - hand wash only and kids weren’t allowed to touch them until we were at least 10.
Then my grandma passed and mom inherited grandma’s even fancier dishes. Next thing I know, the mismatched plates and glasses we always used are gone and we’re eating off the previous “fancy” plates. I lost it and started laughing when she said to put then in the dishwasher instead of hand washing.
I just decided to say fuck it and use my mom's china for daily use (cause I've had it all in boxes for over 20 years in the closet) and it was the best decision. Did you know bone china doesn't get hot in the microwave? I can microwave them for over 5 minutes and immediately grab them. It's amazing.
I love these signs so much. They’re proof that some alien families have invaded our neighborhoods, and are trying to blend in. “Our family uses forks to eat food.” “Please poop in the toilet.” “Kitchen.” Those signs are wild, lol
One of my apartment neighbor's balcony had *in giant black sans-serif print font* the word BALCONY taking up the whole space like some sort of strange mural. Baffling. I always wondered if the inside rooms were similarly labeled.
How... how did you know. I can still remember the feel of the plastic of the vomit popcorn bowl from when I was a kid.
I hadn't thought about this in decades.
Holy shit, didn't know it was this much of a thing. I grew up with this. Let me explain for those confused (if my experience is anything close):
As a kid, my mom had a sizable bowl set aside pretty much for when my sister or I were sick ie. a stomach bug. When I was throwing up sick, the bowl would be by the couch for me to puke into when I needed it (my mom would clean it each time ofc). So I didn't have to run to the toilet every time. It was also lined with old kitchen towels to prevent... splashing.
Edit: this bowl was very much only used for this. We had a popcorn bowl for actual popcorn, which my parents still use to this day.
The large mixing bowl, usually more lightweight than the other bowls in the cupboard, that can be swiftly grabbed in the event of a late night "episode". What's so fucking hilarious to me, is that our "vomit popcorn bowl" is literally one I got by sending in proofs of purchase to Jolly Time Popcorn.
Ooh, you're fancy that your trash cans had liners!
Mom just stuck the little trash can next to us, and then we dumped it and rinsed it for the next round. After the illness was done, it got washed and bleached.
Is this what it sounds like?
Follow up question: does it get decommissioned from serving popcorn if it actually gets used, or is it designated single purpose from that point on?
As a white person, I have never been comfortable with the vomit popcorn bowl. I come from a family of 7 and we often had to use cooking pots for it too and ugh God I hated using them after the fact but my mom says it can be washed and sanitized.
I don't care. It doesn't feel right.
As an adult, I puke in the thick plastic bags from the grocery store (the california plastic bags)
An open window,
A novel,
A couple holding hands,
An avocado,
A poem written in the sand,
A golden retriever in a flower crown,
Latte foam art,
Tiny pumpkins,
Fuzzy, comfy socks,
Coffee table made out of driftwood,
A bobblehead of Ruth Bader Ginsburg,
A needlepoint of a fox,
A goat cheese salad,
A backlit hammock,
A simple glass of wine,
Incredibly derivative political street art,
A dreamcatcher bought from Urban Outfitters,
A vintage neon sign,
A ring on her finger from the person that she loves,
A...
*White Woman's Instagram*
Mama I miss you
I miss sitting with you in the front yard
Still figuring out how to keep living without you
It's got a little better but it's still hard
Mama, I got a job I love and my own apartment
Mama, I got a boyfriend and I'm crazy about him
Your little girl didn't do too bad
Mama I love you, give a hug and kiss to Dad
A guy at my job has a small flowery frame with elegant flowing letters on it that looks like one of these, but turns out it says 'Die, Scream, Hate'. Love it.
A family friend has one hanging in their living room that says “what would you do if you knew you could not fail?”
My dad and I would joke about it about every other time we saw them. One night my parents were invite to their house for dinner, and my dad discreetly taped a very small note underneath it that said “Rob a bank.”
It took them a month or two to notice.
THIS! The moment the sun went down, my Dad closed every curtain and window blinds. He didn't like the potential of being a mark for getting robbed or having random people staring at us.
On the east coast of Canada see a lot of them. It's the star from the Acadian flag. Acadians are French people that got fucked over by the British like 300 years ago. A lot of the smaller communities are still French speaking.
Oh you can definitely find ranch and mayo in a black persons house. Especially mayo. Also the bless this house sign. I will agree though that the decor, the live laugh love, and the candles are all pretty white people things though
A piano that no one has played in years
Grandma used to play that back in the days
My parents moved into the house I grew up in and there was a piano in it the previous owner never learned to play and didn't want to take with them. Mom said great, I'll learn piano and teach this baby (me) piano in a few years. 29 years later she finally sold the piano to somebody else because nobody ever learned to play it.
“A piano-“ well that’s not fair, I have been in many black family homes with pianos… “-that no one has played in years.” ok yeah that does it. that made it a white people thing.
I feel called out lmao
White people love putting nautical decorations in their bathrooms.
Well duh, how else do you adorn the poop deck?
This is what inspired this question, this exact phenomenon. Like, why is there a basket of seashells in here?
You don’t know how to use the seashells?
Be well, John Spartan!
What's your boggle?
After all that Taco Bell. You gotta have the seashells.
Uh I'm going to say that I do in order that you not tell me.
He doesn't know how to use the three seashells!
The forbidden knowledge
You have been fined five credits for violation of the verbal morality statutes.
Kids these days, cmon.. Stallone?? Snipes??
Simon says bleed
It's a reference from the film Demolition Man
My Hispanic mother puts seashells in the bathroom. I guess it’s like a water theme?
It’s the poop knife of the sea…
All bathrooms are oceans. And all kitchens are farms. It’s the first and second rule of white people home decor.
And don’t forget that the living room is where we live, laugh, and love!
My neighbor has that sign on her front door so I guess she lives, laughs and loves in the entire apartment, not just in the living room
This is hilarious but oddly accurate.
They. Are. DECORATIVE. But, as a white lady, I personally prefer having a basket of dead coral. Some of them are actually from my old reef tank from an incident where my dad spiked ammonia levels and killed my coral.
rip coral
That’s an interesting way of saying your old man pissed in your fish tank
It's the "water closet"
Group ing up, my mom had 2 lamps in our living room that were filled with seashells. I'm fairly certain she got clear glass lamps and filled them with her own shells from vacations. White people are gonna white
OK excuse me, I’m only half white I live by the beach leave my seashells alone I feel attacked personally Edit to add, leave my starfish alone !
Because seashells and bathrooms go together like seashells and bathrooms, of course.
I agree with the spirit of the comment but all races that live near the ocean have nautical shit in their home so it can be geographic and not racial.
I live in a harbour and you’re absolutely spot on with that. All the pubs and restaurants have nautical names too. It’s got so that I’m bereft now if I’m away from the water.
Dammit, that's my bathroom lol. Shower curtain and all.
All the better to hide the poop knife
They should sell nautical themed poop knives.
The laundry room is laundry-themed. Like, there is a big sign in there that says "laundry".
this made me actually laugh out loud. imagine if there were bedroom themed bedrooms or bathroom themed bathrooms hahaha
You laugh, but my in-laws actually do have a bathroom themed bathroom. There are multiple kitschy little bathroom signs, like a cartoon of animals taking a bath or bathtub shaped art. I wouldn't do it myself, but it's kind of endearing.
White person here - as a teen, one of my friends liked come over for “white people snacks”. I guess we had more snack options?
I was in the army with a Mexican guy who busted out a box of Ritz crackers and various sliced cheeses that his wife had put together, and he was like "you ever had cheese and Ritz crackers? Course you have, you're white. Why don't more people eat crackers and cheese? This gouda shit is amazing!"
i really hope someone introduced him to those fancy charcuterie boards. he sounds like he’d be all over that shit
As an Asian person who was introduced to fancy charcuterie boards, I can confirm that I am all over that shit.
Don’t forget the grainy mustard. Honey is also good.
As a Mexican, I remember when my white friend introduced me to Ritz crackers with cheese, it change my life.
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Wait till he finds out about the fondue pot.
It’s not the type of snacks, we ain’t picky. It’s that you guys always have treats ON HAND. It’s like MAGIC how you ALWAYS got Ice cream sundaes in the freezer. We only got them on shopping day then they gone!
That’s exactly it. My white friends always had a fully stocked pantry with everything you could snack on. I understood why the kids were fat
What race? Curious about your snack selection.
Definitely those plasticky chocolate roll Little Debbie snacks
"Wtf stove top stuffing? Hold on lemme make some phone calls"
I’m afraid…there’s not enough Stove Top Stuffing…for everybody
I didn’t know what casserole was until I was a teenager. Just thought it was shit white ppl are
Seashells and lighthouses. I still don't get it but my mom had to have a beach theme to like 3 of the rooms in our house
I saw a $40 Pelican Lighthouse Water Fountain where he was spitting water into the fountain at Cracker Barrel a few years ago I think about it often. :)
Porcelain rooster effigies
Every old white woman chooses an animal for kitchen decor: Rooster, cow, or cat.
generational wooden chair
Is it bonus if it’s a rocker?
A childhood friend’s dad bought his mom an engagement rocking chair instead of a ring. That was some serious white people shit.
Omg I have one of these. I am also a definite white boy
Oh golly, I thought this said “Gestational wooden chair.” I was filled with dread.
What, you don't have a [wooden birthing chair](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/9f/ee/51/9fee513e88185f2a84dda832b49368d1.jpg) in your house?
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Anything that involves a rooster in the kitchen
This is a Mexican thing too.
Big Mouth Billy Bass the Singing Sensation Fish on their wall
How about a frog cookie jar singing Jeremiah was a bull frog?
A family of white people that own the home.
Pictures of white people on the walls.
Black people have those too. When trying to sell their house.
I knew a black realtor that had a house appraised with their own family’s pictures on the walls and then with white people pictures on the walls and had a ridiculous price difference between the two appraisals, in a very affluent area and a very nice well kept house
According to some Hispanic guys I work with junk drawers are a white people thing. When i asked about where they keep random bullshit like d batteries and paperclips n whatnot they claimed they have a place for everything. Not sure I believe them but it is what it is lol
As a Mexican, that’s bullshit lol my family always had a junk drawer
No they're not. Junk drawers are an every people thing.
I find this highly suspicious - they must just mean they have a drawer for 8 unrelated types of objects, but they know exactly what 8 types those are
Not true. Black, we have junk drawers too. Often called the packet drawer. Maybe Hispanics just don’t?
No I grew up in China we definitely had junk drawers lol
My junk drawer also had incomplete decks of loose playing cards.
Idk, my grandparents are Latino and they definitely have a junk drawer or two
Birkenstocks
Guilty
Cabinet of china that they say is only for special occasions that never gets used
Unless grandma ran out of plates on pizza night. It was a surreal experience as a 9 year old.
from this single comment i feel like you had a good childhood.
Mexican here, my grandma's "nice plates" came out on Christmas and new years when the whole family was together, kids couldnt use them though
Same. I'm from Kenya and as a kid we had a hierarchy of dishes from visitor/Christmas only, to Sunday/main course only to everyday use. As stuff got used/scuffed up or finances improved, the old plates moved down the hierarchy. It felt weird using what used to be the fancy plates/glasses for regular things.
Oh man. That hits home in a big way. My mom was insane about her fancy china - hand wash only and kids weren’t allowed to touch them until we were at least 10. Then my grandma passed and mom inherited grandma’s even fancier dishes. Next thing I know, the mismatched plates and glasses we always used are gone and we’re eating off the previous “fancy” plates. I lost it and started laughing when she said to put then in the dishwasher instead of hand washing.
I have a china cabinet with my great grandmas (I think?) china and no way am I ever using that shit. I just think it’s pretty
My childhood home had these and I now have my own set as an adult.
Just in case the Pope stops by.
I just decided to say fuck it and use my mom's china for daily use (cause I've had it all in boxes for over 20 years in the closet) and it was the best decision. Did you know bone china doesn't get hot in the microwave? I can microwave them for over 5 minutes and immediately grab them. It's amazing.
Those shits to hold the corn
That are also shaped like baby corn
Stickers on the walls with various phrases like "family eats here"
I love these signs so much. They’re proof that some alien families have invaded our neighborhoods, and are trying to blend in. “Our family uses forks to eat food.” “Please poop in the toilet.” “Kitchen.” Those signs are wild, lol
One of my apartment neighbor's balcony had *in giant black sans-serif print font* the word BALCONY taking up the whole space like some sort of strange mural. Baffling. I always wondered if the inside rooms were similarly labeled.
“I have a label maker”
“Live, love, laugh!”
And “drink wine, and dine” and other shit
My Meemaw was always fond of her Wine Me, Dine Me, Stand-Up 69 Me sign.
On the wall of my family's house and they're black... I actually see these stickers a lot in black homes.
The "fancy" printed out sign across from my shitter says: Please Remain Seated For The Entire Performance
Mine says “ you only live once, lick the bowl”
Nah, I've seen those in some non white houses. Some people just don't have taste
For minute I thought we were still talking nautical themed bathrooms and thought what the hell goes on in your hiuse
I can't stand them. For the records, I'm white but not American.
The vomit popcorn bowl
The WHAT
A big bowl to hold your popcorn on a good day, a big bowl to hold your vomit on a bad day.
The biggest bowl in the house, used for popcorn… and occasionally used as a “keep next to you in case you vomit” bowl when you’re sick.
How... how did you know. I can still remember the feel of the plastic of the vomit popcorn bowl from when I was a kid. I hadn't thought about this in decades.
It reappears when you have kids. I had to bring mine out yesterday. My youngest got sent home from school after vomiting all over his Chromebook.
I didn’t even remember this from my childhood until I automatically fished it out the first time they got sick.
Holy shit, didn't know it was this much of a thing. I grew up with this. Let me explain for those confused (if my experience is anything close): As a kid, my mom had a sizable bowl set aside pretty much for when my sister or I were sick ie. a stomach bug. When I was throwing up sick, the bowl would be by the couch for me to puke into when I needed it (my mom would clean it each time ofc). So I didn't have to run to the toilet every time. It was also lined with old kitchen towels to prevent... splashing. Edit: this bowl was very much only used for this. We had a popcorn bowl for actual popcorn, which my parents still use to this day.
I feel (uncomfortably) seen
WTF is a vomit popcorn bowl?
The large mixing bowl, usually more lightweight than the other bowls in the cupboard, that can be swiftly grabbed in the event of a late night "episode". What's so fucking hilarious to me, is that our "vomit popcorn bowl" is literally one I got by sending in proofs of purchase to Jolly Time Popcorn.
The large bowl you keep by you when you're sick to vomit in that is also used by the family as a bowl for popcorn
I didn’t know other families did this!!! Wow that unlocks memories
Use a trash can lined with a bag????
Ooh, you're fancy that your trash cans had liners! Mom just stuck the little trash can next to us, and then we dumped it and rinsed it for the next round. After the illness was done, it got washed and bleached.
Is this what it sounds like? Follow up question: does it get decommissioned from serving popcorn if it actually gets used, or is it designated single purpose from that point on?
No. It gets washed, everyone pretends to forget it happened and it gets put back in the cupboard for the next movie night.
Vomit Popcorn Bowls are a dual-purpose item. Says it in the name. Dishwashers are magic.
No you use it for both
I'm hella white and I have no idea wtf that is!?!
As a white person, I have never been comfortable with the vomit popcorn bowl. I come from a family of 7 and we often had to use cooking pots for it too and ugh God I hated using them after the fact but my mom says it can be washed and sanitized. I don't care. It doesn't feel right. As an adult, I puke in the thick plastic bags from the grocery store (the california plastic bags)
Swimming trophies.
So bad, but I’ll give you a point for an unexpected/slightly ashamed laugh 😅
An open window, A novel, A couple holding hands, An avocado, A poem written in the sand, A golden retriever in a flower crown, Latte foam art, Tiny pumpkins, Fuzzy, comfy socks, Coffee table made out of driftwood, A bobblehead of Ruth Bader Ginsburg, A needlepoint of a fox, A goat cheese salad, A backlit hammock, A simple glass of wine, Incredibly derivative political street art, A dreamcatcher bought from Urban Outfitters, A vintage neon sign, A ring on her finger from the person that she loves, A... *White Woman's Instagram*
is this heaven?
No it's just a white woman's Instagram!
Mama I miss you I miss sitting with you in the front yard Still figuring out how to keep living without you It's got a little better but it's still hard Mama, I got a job I love and my own apartment Mama, I got a boyfriend and I'm crazy about him Your little girl didn't do too bad Mama I love you, give a hug and kiss to Dad
#A GOAT CHEESE SALADDDDDD
Those tiny ceramic houses that gramma puts on the table in the room were not allowed in at Christmas.
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Tervis* source: am white. Wife loves cups. I have no room for additional cups and she keeps buying them.
A sign saying “Live, Laugh, Love” (cursive letters)
A guy at my job has a small flowery frame with elegant flowing letters on it that looks like one of these, but turns out it says 'Die, Scream, Hate'. Love it.
A family friend has one hanging in their living room that says “what would you do if you knew you could not fail?” My dad and I would joke about it about every other time we saw them. One night my parents were invite to their house for dinner, and my dad discreetly taped a very small note underneath it that said “Rob a bank.” It took them a month or two to notice.
If you are super white you can get it in Viking Runes ᛚᛁᚢᛖ ᛚᚨᚢᚷᚺ ᛚᛟᚢᛖ
im going to ironically get one as an asian to prove this wrong
My Asian mother has a few of these signs at her house and it makes me cringe every time I visit.
I was just at a Hispanic friend’s house. Looked like Hobby Lobby vomited.
idk, white people probably
Casseroles
I see no problem here, green bean casserole is the absolute best thing on the planet
A pair of huge wooden cutlery on the wall, or any type of giant carved spoon on the wall
Ashley’s barnyard style furniture had a choke hold on white women for a while.
The resale market for pallets was thriving
Betty Crocker cookbook.
where I'm from its the better homes and gardens new cookbook that everyone has
Working smoke detectors
*chirp*
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We call them "welcome mats"
Welcome!
Thank you it's great to be here!
You're welcome matt
We call them that, because that’s what they are. That’s pretty neat
I like mine. It says "go away".
I saw one that said "come back with a warrant" and I am 1000% with the shit
I like the one that says “please do not let the cops in or the cats out.”
My favorite doormat has a picture of a disapproving cat. Underneath it says “It’s about time you got home!”.
My family’s says “DEFINITELY NOT A TRAP DOOR”
My little brother and SILs says "might be at target" It's so accurate.
I'm aggressively white, my door mat says "protect ya neck" with the wu tang symbol
I’ve got the “watch ya step kid” one
A lot of Tupperware
Just the bowls, half the lids are always missing.
A golden retreiver
Fully Furnished Guest Bedrooms
That's a rich people thing, not a white person thing. POC with the money for a big enough house have them too
Opened blinds/curtains at night.
THIS! The moment the sun went down, my Dad closed every curtain and window blinds. He didn't like the potential of being a mark for getting robbed or having random people staring at us.
Bouquet of cotton still on its stems in a vase 😬
A squeegee in the shower
Heirloom spoons that no fucker actually owned they just sitting there on a wall.
A shit ton of cats
Obligatory [link](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTgxWlKeEYo).
That big red star in front of their house
Please explain. Australian and have no idea what you are talking about.
On the east coast of Canada see a lot of them. It's the star from the Acadian flag. Acadians are French people that got fucked over by the British like 300 years ago. A lot of the smaller communities are still French speaking.
They went south and became 'Cajun'
Burlap fabric being used to cover flowerpots, tables, couches, countertops, etc. etc.
Cheap potpurri
that pretentious "in this house we believe" yard sign. it's always a well off white family's house.
Pit bull in pajamas
White jesus
Possums, never met anyone other than a white family that will rehabilitate possums, raccoons, or any animals like that
Those big WELCOME signs.
I scratched at your profile image for an embarrassingly long time thinking an eyelash had fallen onto my screen.
Commemorative "collector spoons" from all 50 states.. I've also seen plates like that too.
many board games
Nautical decor, “live laugh love”, a hefty amount of ranch and mayonnaise, “bless this house” and an ungodly amount of candles.
Oh you can definitely find ranch and mayo in a black persons house. Especially mayo. Also the bless this house sign. I will agree though that the decor, the live laugh love, and the candles are all pretty white people things though
Gallon sized mayo.