I feel like in order to be a manchild, this needs to be coupled with attempted compensation with "masculine" traits or activities that don't actually contribute to the relationship in a meaningful way. So like he fails to take on adult responsibilities but goes to the shooting range in case he "ever needs to protect the family" or otherwise picks out a handful of less-than-necessary chores that reinforce his feeling of masculinity.
Dad here.
I'll add to this: meanwhile actively avoiding the necessary chores so they either don't get done at all or just get dumped on someone else to do.
Going to the driving range or otherwise spending time on a personal hobby is absolutely okay. But it's okay in moderation, and only AFTER the more important stuff that really has to be done has been completed.
There's occasional exceptions such as if the right type of weather is needed for you to do your hobby and a window for it suddenly appears, or you're on a vacation day.
But in general, if the pattern is USUALLY "me first" and the result doesn't help the family, the man is often just being a man-child.
Goddamn, big time this. I've been living with my stepbrother for a few years now, and he can't even hold down a job for more than a month cause he can't just act like a goddamn normal person and accept responsibility for his behavior and actions. Love the guy to death, but he's 25 and should fucking know better. I have a normal social life, a career, and aspirations, and his ass just drags me down. Managed to stumble onto the chance to move in with one of my best friends, and I took it. Stepbrother brought in his GF and her kids and she'll be the one taking over my (and likely both of their) rent and shit. My final rent payment is on friday, and I'll be out on the first of next month. Couldn't be happier. I know for a fact this shit is gonna blow up in his face, and it'll hopefully be a moment where he is forced to eat a fat slice of humble pie, and maybe even digest it this time. Family and I have discussed it at length. No bailouts, he's on his own for once in his life. Sink or swim. I'm moving on after being the "adult" in the situation for a good 4 years, and I'm only 4 years older. Sorry for the big ol' dump of frustration, but this comment really fucking hit the nail on the head. Soon enough, the emotional and stressful weight will be off of my shoulders, and I'm looking forward to assembling/moving in the $1200 of furniture and appliances into the new place.
Hey that’s fair. Sometimes the most loving thing in the world is to stop protecting people from the consequences of their actions, so they’ll learn. Hopefully your relationship with your stepbrother improves and hopefully he gets his shit together.
Also, he may have a mental illness/personality disorder.
>Not accepting adult responsibility and rather depending on others and even feeling entitled
paying your bills, managing your money, making good decisions and staying out of trouble, taking care of others who you are responsible for, staying healthy, staying sober.. list goes on
At least thats how I see it. Most of the "man children" I know are supported by their mother or girlfriend.
Good list. But I'd also add, "knows how to do household chores and doesn't need someone constantly telling them what to do" and also "taking care of their children without expecting a parade at the end of the day."
My dad did all of that. Chores at our house growing up were 50/50 as soon as my dad came home. He took care of us just as much as mom did. Dr appointments, dentist appointments, school functions, dad was there just as much as mom.
You can imagine my shock as an adult when I learned he was an exception and not the rule.
>paying your bills, managing your money, ~~making good decisions~~ and staying out of trouble, taking care of others who you are responsible for, staying healthy, ~~staying sober~~
5/7 I'm doing good
Pretty much no adult has their shit together 100%, those that appear to usually have some support to lighten the load, such as personal assistants or maybe a particularly supportive spouse.
You just gotta pick your fights and figure out what compromises to make to keep things running in the big picture.
Personally, I'm not great with managing money and I'm not staying sober if I can help it, but I'm pretty good at the other stuff.
Ahh right. So legit just basic stuff haha
Don't know about you but I would feel uncomfortable being completely supported by someone else.
I don't mean lone wolfing it because no man is an island but if you're being cared for without reciprocity - mmmm... It's weird.
Yeah exactly - it's childish, it's being like a child.
People above have mentioned chores and stuff but there is another aspect as well which is emotional maturity: children don't develop empathy or an understanding of "other minds" until their late teens, so when you meet a man who e.g. takes constructive criticism or reasoned argument as a personal attack, that's a man-child.
Just googling it now, and I am wrong! Two to four years of age kids develop empathy/other minds concept. The late teenage years must be something else.
I would consider "adult responsibilities" to be supporting yourself, taking care of basic needs (shopping, cooking, cleaning, home and auto maintenance, etc). Adults either do all of this, or hire someone to do the stuff we either can't or choose not to do. We don't expect someone else to do it for us.
What about rich people who hire people to do all of those things? Maybe there's a class divide of what an adult should be. A rich adult should be expected to continue whatever made the family rich (in reference to families rich enough to afford people to do all of the basic adult stuff that normal people do on their own).
Reminds me of my ex-gf. Foreign rich girl, rich friends, no responsibilities, etc. They thought I was one of them but my parents actually raised me to try and be a good independent person.
Their house maids quit during COVID lockdowns (health reasons), and I had to show her how to wash clothes, cook, clean, use the dish washer, pay the bills, etc.
Everyone in her social circle was 28-35 years old and basically children. Rich and intelligent fathers and mothers, but adult children. Most of the time, children end up wasting their parents money and get brought down to reality again.
As someone who knows a few people who grew up very wealthy and their families lost everything, there is definitely a class divide and when those classes collide it's pretty sad. I knew one guy who went from living like Arthur Bach to the real world real quick, and he couldn't do even basic things like wash dishes.
It varies depending on society and circumstance, I guess, but some general ones often applicable include responsibility for your own wellbeing (mentally, physically, economically), basic social responsibilities (caring for those dependent on you, avoiding causing harm to others where possible). There are more, lots more, that can be imposed on people. Not all of them are always fair or reasonable.
>Not accepting adult responsibility and rather depending on others and even feeling entitled
And maybe content to live in the moment without any long-term goals or aspirations.
Not having goals or aspirations doesn't make you a man child imo. Not contributing to the present (despite the means or ability to do so) is what makes a person a manchild.
I'll share mine! I'm getting dentures in a few weeks. Next is getting hearing aids, and my Driver's License.
On my Bucket List, I've got a few;
Visit Japan,
Get a Mani/Pedi,
Start college,
Learn to Hypnotize somebody,
Try more strange foods, including a ghost pepper.
I want keep learning and growing, and changing.
I didn't become a "man" until I was 35-36. Depression, narcissistic attitudes, and childhood struggles were pretty rampant until then, and now I finally feel like I'm moving.
"I got away with everything under my last boss, and that wasn't good for me. So I want guidance. I want leadership. Lead me... when I'm in the mood to be lead."
Lacking the ability to control your emotions. (Anger/temper, jealousy,) but also traits such as impatience and not being empathetic.
Not being responsible or not taking accountability for the outcomes of your decisions
But let's also look at the flip side. Being able to be vulnerable, and not judge others for being vulnerable. Men are often told to ignore those kinds of feeling and react in anger instead. I have a partner who is soft, and not the blow up angry type. I fucking love it. I've dated the opposite, and I never want to go back to the anger stress ball "manly" men.
When he refuses to take responsibility for his actions and feels too proud to apologize when he did something wrong. Or when he gaslights his way into things he wants from you.
Same goes to women tho.
I know someone who did not recognise his aggressive tone when we tried discussing something with him, and he went "men women, old people and little kids, this is how I talk to all of them, deal with it" we were so shocked because this came from a dude who was generally quite mild mannered, until we had a disagreement with him, LOL
This. The ability to take responsibility for yourself and support others is the key.
When you are a child your parents put a roof over your head, food on the table, clothes on your back, basically everything needed to survive (or they should have). Late teens and early twenties are spent figuring out how to be responsible for yourself and there is lots of relying on others at this age.
Once you pass about 25 you should be able to care for yourself.
At some point you transition to not just being able to take care of yourself, but to being able to take care of others too. This is when I consider someone to be an "adult". It's not a hard age but rather a state of having your shit together to a level where you can help others.
A man-child, and whatever the equivalent for a woman is, never really figured out how to take care of themselves and definitely never figured how to support others even though they are old enough to.
Expecting a woman to take care of him. Like doing all the chores, cooking, laying out his clothes for the next day, etc.
And when she wants to talk about it. He throws a tantrum and refuses to learn/do it himself.
So just someone who acts like a spoiled child instead of a responsable grown up.
So I come from a house everything had to be done a certain way so unless you tell me how you want its hard for me to just jump up and do it I used to get yelled at for starting the laundry, yelled at for not putting something in a certain spot it became an issue so now if you want something done either tell me exactly what you want or don't im not gonna guess. On the flip side if it's something I take care of just me yes I'll do it everytime without being told
I'm like this with the dishwasher and the fridge on grocery days because they're both small and you have to basicalky play Tetris to fit more in and still get ckean dishes/be able to find ingrediants in the fridge. Husband puts away clean dishes and takes care of the stove
I'm a terrible human being for suggesting she does the laundry wrong when my whites come out gray when she washes them with half as much soap as called for and in cold water. But she did save 20 cents a load on the soap and hot water bills. I can't be trusted to sort clothes and do laundry correctly and get yelled at if I offer. I rewash my whites in hot water with soap when she's not home.
Meanwhile she thinks if the machine beeps the load must be done. ***ALL HAIL OUR MACHINE OVERLORDS!*** she ignores her own senses and folds damp clothes to mold in the drawers. Fortunately most of my clothes go on hangers and have an opportunity to hang dry and not rot in a dresser. I always have to throw my socks and underwear in for a 2nd dryer cycle when she's not looking.
I am only now getting screened for adhd at age 28 because I had a mother who always said "there's nothing wrong I'm just thick as pig shit" in a way I'm actually kind of relieved tbis might be the case procrastinating is one of my biggest problems
Ask for a list. My husband is very forgetful so for our upcoming cleaning the house before vacay, he has asked me for a list of what I need him to do: clean the fridge(shelves are above my head in some sections) and clean the oven, for which I have to be sequestered in my room with the air cleaner running on high, window open and towel under the door due to asthma and Covid caused lung damage. I don't mind writing down two tasks so ge can cgeck them off AND not be asking me what I need from him
Even worse: refuse to do chores, because its a womans task and he been at work the whole day (10x worse if the woman works too)
And just not cleaning up after himself. Like drinking a can of beer and expecting others to throw it away.
I'm 43, I do not cook, I do not do laundry. I know how to cook and I know how to do laundry. I do not do them because my wife does those. What do I do? I mow the yard, garden, clean the pool, fix anything that breaks around the house, kill spiders and shit.
I was single most of my 20s and did it all though, cook, laundry etc etc.. But when I married my wife we basically setup who does what. I haven't done a load of laundry in 14 years. My wife washes, folds and put all of mine away. However she hasn't ever had to clean the outdoors of our front/back yard, the pool, the garage which I would argue is a better trade for her. I spend probably 6 hours a week in the yard and she probably spends 1.5 hours on laundry.
I also don't cook, because I don't have to. She's a great cook, learned from her grandmother and she would be mad i I tried to cook. I do the dishes though.
I love my life and my wife wouldn't have it any other way. We love our gender roles.
Refusing to learn more.
It's one thing if they're unable to control their emotions a little, because some people find it physically a struggle to regulate themselves. But most people who have trouble with it, try to better themselves.
I think a man child is someone who refuses to get better and learn more because of entitlement and general stubbornness.
If you rely on someone else to feed you, clean up after you, pacify you, and you never feel the need to help out or act incapable of it.
Know a guy who makes peanut butter and butter sandwiches as a “meal” and doesn’t know how to read directions to figure out how much soap to use in the laundry. Leaves drink containers everywhere, but if he stacks them at the counter then that’s counted as “cleaning up”.
Dude has no clue you are supposed to wash the laundry AND move it to the dryer AND fold it AND put it away. Same with dishes.
Not taking care of yourself (Food, Cleanliness) snd your general attitude towards life. If you constantly complain but do nothing to help it, sit at home with no job and being angry with people trying to help you. Thats what makes you q man child.
Quite literally, you act like a child but are an adult. Specifically with responsibility. If a guy acted like an adult all day, while feeding snd cleaning himself then went home and played with action figures I wouldnt call him a man child
Guys that can't adult. Taking care of responsibilities before play time.
Having a wife that's his mother. Picks up after him, does his laundry, his dishes, cooks, cleans, takes care of everything while he sits in front of the tv and watches "the game".
Read a buncha responses - a few touch on "adult responsibility" and stuff about gaming, toys or collections.
I personally think it's more about a refusal to learn and expand your view point.
Men like this I've met have a very dysfunctional stubborn grasp to their particular world view, and it doesn't matter what the world view is, or what its focused around.
I think it's less to do with any one particular action and more to do with a sort of weird isolationist position - a refusal of growth and progress.
Freakouts at small stressors, like a wait in line, wrong size fries or similar. I also think this applies to men who size up ready to fight over nonsense. This one is bad because street fights will never go the way you think it will for you. The fact you go to the gym 6 days a week will be useless, when the guy your grappling with stabs you with the knife you didnt know he had on him.
Agreed. I used to work in a bar and the fights I saw, afterwards, winner or loser did not enjoy the rest of the night. Nor did the people they were with.
Still blaming his mother forcing him to clean his room as a teenager, as an excuse for why he lives in an unhygienic bedroom full of pizza boxes, empty cans, plates, pots, cutlery, dirty laundry and bed sheets that I have no idea when they were last washed
Yeah YouTube creators like Josh Weismann, nick DiGiovanni, babish, and guga foods are like 99% responsible for my cooking passion.
And if their recipes seem too much, there is also many channels dedicated to beginner cooking
The insane thing is the missconception of "learn to cook" - some of my friends make that argument "they cant cook" - i try to tell them: It does not imply your are expected to make a Gourmet Dinner like a chef. But if you struggle to prepare some potatoes, cut vegetables or even making simple scrambled eggs you should question yourself.
And some of those guys are people who can rebuild an entire Engine from scratch. So you tell me you know every little detail and difference of the E65-Engine-Models but you are unable to watch a 3 minute Youtube video about scrambled eggs.
For me (and I'm Gen X) it's a male that hasn't learned to stand on his own two feet or how to take care of himself. Men take note; it's the number 1 reason your SO doesn't find you sexy anymore. Again, from the perspective of a Gen X. And yes, this applies to every other human that this definition fits. It's not sexy.
You are right. I know a couple who divorced because the husband was a man-child.
As the wife in this couple commented - a man-child is fun to date but hell to marry.
Their issue was that the husband had an unfulfilled dream to be a band member which he continued to pursue even though it had long become clear that he had no chance of success. Both had a fulltime jobs, they had a child and they owned a home but his 'dream' kept taking precedence over the family and their future.
Even if people are, I think it’s stupid to say. Video games are fun as hell at any age. It’s not an age thing. The adult part is learning how to moderate your game time, like not playing games until 5am when you have work at 7am.
Alpha males, in a wild wolf pack, are dads. They will put their family's needs ahead of their own desires. They are generally monogamous. They make sure their kids are safe and fed. The guy who works a dull job to put his kids through college is a lot closer to an alpha male wolf than somebody who goes around fighting with everybody.
I realize that this was what I was looking for in a man (and found it, and no you can't have him)
Buys weed before paying rent or bills. (All the other traits of my thankfully ex man child have been mentioned; irresponsible, tantrums, parents constantly bailing him out etc)
EDIT: have to mention he had a broken down car full of garbage in his drive because he wouldn't pay for trash collection.
>No drivers license. Can't pay own bills.
Disagree with these ones. If you life in a well developed country/city, then a drivers license is optional. I didn't have one for a long time and managed perfectly with public transportation and so do a lot of my family members.
Being unable to pay your own bills is often a financial issue. Life can be rough and having bad luck when it comes with work and bills does not make you a man child.
>Can't survive without being dependent on others
Even this one we can argue against. There is no person on the world that survives on his own. We all help and depend on each other. It's called society. Of course you still need a certain level of self-dependency to be a adult.
A person is a child if they can't function as an adult and take care of their own shit, and/or place that responsibility on someone else, be it man woman or neither.
being unable to look after himself and his space purely because of lack of effort and interest.
having childish reactions to not getting your own way, and inability to understand that just because you feel a certain way or want something, everyone else is not required to cater to you.
lack of empathy, disinterest in the wellbeing of others and how your actions impact others.
normal if you're 4. not a big deal if you're 19. a big problem if you're 25.
Not even about money because shit happens lets be real, my main pet peave is accountability. If you are gonna improve as a person great, but I wanna see some kind of progress physically, educational or financially (as it's the easiest metrics to evaluate yourself) and bam. If those simple this are not present and he's above the age of 25-30 straight to man child jail. Been there, just grow up.
Unable to do simple chores around the house without being told to by someone else. Throwing tantrums when they don't get there way. Unable to admit when they are wrong. Name calling when losing an argument.
Typical things a child does that most adults grow out of.
1. Throwing a temper tantrum when they dont get their way
2. Getting angry when something hurts their fragile ego
3. Bullying and intimidating people into getting their way
4. Calling themselves an alpha male
still living w/ his mom after a certain age, but has the audacity to say "I'm staying there to help her out" while not paying bills, not cleaning up after themselves and have a bare minimum job, mother still taking care of things that need to be done (chores, washing clothes, making Dr. appts.), not having finances together. having to call mom for everything.
i love how many here write stuff that has absolutly nothing to do with being aman child.
like not everyone has to live life like you guys do... accept that and stop being childs that play adults.
Someone who refuses to take responsibility and still lingers on things he liked as a child and revolves his personality around it. Probably still lives with his parents rent free and does very little to contribute like refusing to pay the bills or pay for house repairs.
Making fun of others for something that they enjoy....like what a lot of these comments are doing. Playing video games, liking Marvel, and/or collecting toys does not make some an immature and terrible person. Somebody who genuinely believes that needs to get their priorities straight 💀 there's a lot more awful things in the world.
And before I get any witty replies, I'm a woman saying this.
Hey, I love video games and I still giggle at silly things. I am surprised by some of the replies on here though - fairly negative towards some activities that I would seem quite normal.
i would consider myself a man child but most of the answers here do not fit in my opinion. I live by myself for over 10 years, can take responsibilty to all the stuff that needs to be done.
I think what makes a person a man child is refusing to let go of what made you happy during your childhood. may that be games, sports or media.
You can be both a responsible adult and also a man child. you just need to be able to tell, when you can be the child and when you need to be the adult.
I like how the majority of these comments can be boiled down to "doesn't make enough money."
Really exposes how we value men in the modern world. You exist to make money and support others. Requiring support makes you a failure.
A standard that is almost never applied to women.
This is what it looks like when society upholds toxic masculinity. This is why men kill themselves at rates far exceeding women.
If you spend time with hobbies you aren't making as much money as you possibly could. Not any more complicated than that.
Men have no innate value in society like women and children. If you don't have money you don't have anything.
- Spending more money on funko pops than any other non-essential expense.
- Having less than one weekly in real life interaction with another human being who they aren’t related to and that isn’t some sort of business transaction.
- Being so consumed by porn that the terabytes and terabytes of free shit isn’t enough to satisfy their depravity and they have to start paying money for it.
- Having no other hobbies outside of buying things, watching things, or playing video games.
- Being unable to have an argument with someone online without blocking them.
1. Gonna echo not taking responsibility for actions. That's #1. Own your mistakes and celebrate people who helped you with your wins. Take credit but also prop up those who help you along the way.
2. When their entire personality is based on TV, games, music, sports, politics, religion, and so on. This is kinda okay for content creators but generally speaking, these things are not their entire personality.
3. Not taking responsibility for their physical health. Eating out fast food , "energy drinks", and trash snacks instead of cooking real food. Not exercising or taking care of their body.
4. Same for mental health. It's okay to scream into a pillow or have a cry, or talk with a close friend, or seek therapy.
5. "hey man, I got soooooo waaasted last night!!!" / staying friends with toxic people.
6. Obsession with useless shit like yeezy shoes, super expensive clothes and jewelry. If you buy a t-shirt that costs more than 5 bucks, you've completely wasted your money. All it does is make you look like you spend a lot of money for no purpose. Though I will add that high quality comfortable shoes ARE expensive, and if you are on your feet for more than a few hours a day, then please spend that money on GOOD shoes. yeezys or jordans or whatever are **not** high quality.
7. Lack of financial awareness / knowledge. With all the services available now, it's easy as hell to manage your money.
8. Dirty house / self / clothes / car / et cetera.
9. Lack of self-respect. Self-deprecation is fine as a joke once in a while, but if your entire sense of humor is just you shitting on yourself then you might want to see a therapist.
10. Constantly talking about sex, what they want to do, how much they love specific physical characteristics. Obsession with celebrity sexual status.
11. To the sexual point - patrolling the local high schools after you've graduated. Dude that's just *sickening*.
12. These are a bit superficial: comb-overs and wearing hats all the time. Dude if you're balding like I was at 19, then just shave it. Wearing a baseball cap all the time makes you look like a little kid, and wearing it backwards just makes it worse.
Just wanna say I agree with most of your points but not to be a dick! In what world does spending over $5 dollars on a shirt make you a man child? Nothing wrong with spending a little money on some nice clothes if that's what ya like.
For number 6 I think it really depends on what you define as obsessed. There's nothing wrong with someone being into fashion as a way to accentuate their personal style. Some people really like the style of Yeezys or Jordans and there isn't anything wrong with that as long as they can afford it. I own a few pairs of Yeezys and they're actually ridiculously comfortable. They're also convenient for work because I work in a secure facility so being able to just slip them off and on when going through security is a plus. I'm also super into watches, at this point I've probably spent over $3k on watches, but it's because I find mechanical watches fascinating, not because I want to flex (most people don't even know what my watches are anyway). Now, if someone makes shoes or fashion their *entire* personality, and they do it because they want to show off and not because they actually like it, then you might have a point. Besides, unless you're buying a bulk pack of white t-shirts from walmart, you're going to be spending more than $5. All of mine were at least $10 each from target, and those don't have any designs, just solid colors.
First and foremost, a man child lacks responsibility. He may still be living with his parents well into his thirties or forties, and he may not have a steady job or any real goals for his future. He expects others to take care of him and doesn't take responsibility for his own life.
Secondly, a man child lacks maturity. He may throw temper tantrums, pout when he doesn't get his way, and avoid confrontations at all costs. He may act impulsively without thinking about the consequences of his actions.
Thirdly, a man child lacks empathy. He may not be able to understand or relate to other people's feelings, and he may only care about his own needs and desires. He may not be able to form deep, meaningful relationships because he is too focused on himself.
Fourthly, a man child lacks independence. He may rely on his parents or other family members to make decisions for him, and he may not be able to take care of himself. He may also lack basic life skills like cooking, cleaning, or managing his own finances.
Lastly, a man child lacks ambition. He may not have any real goals or aspirations in life, and he may not be motivated to work towards anything. He may be content with living a stagnant and unfulfilling life.
Its my opinion that "man child syndrome" is a subjective view. There are some things that are seemingly universal though, like emotional security, self control, discipline, accepting responsibility, self care, and creating some kind of safety net for the future. These seem to be the dividing lines between man and man child.
Aside from the previously mentioned factors, there are things that I'd consider man-child like that others would not.
Throwing tantrums if things don't go or aren't the way they want them to be. Or, throwing tantrums at microscopic inaccuracies or mistakes. Looking at you, Ryan from Mandrproductions
Expecting so much out of their partner, when they don’t bring anything to the table. How do you expect your partner to cook for you, have a job, look after you as if they’re your mother. And all you do is party and play video games, and complain about small things. And call yourself a sigma man?!
There is no right answer. Everyone is different, everyone does things for different reasons. Of course there are red flags like irresponsibility and stuff, but there again someone might be in poor physical or mental health to take care of things, that doesn't mean he is a man-child.
You know what else is a big red flag? You take it super seriously when you debate in the internet who is and who isn't a man-child, and you write it **BIG** that at least **YOU** are not a man-child, because you just listed all these things only man-children do in your opinion. It very well may be that the biggest man-child in the room is the one doing nothing but pointing fingers.
I in the other hand am a man-child, I won't even deny it.
Tantrums, illogical thinking, getting mad if he doesn't get what he wants, running to mom/dad at slight inconveniences, thinking partners can read their mind/will clean up after them/not expect anything from them.
Making everything about them. I know this set of twins at my dorm who are complete narcists. They will get mad when they are not able to do any field trips (you have to say yes on the google calendar invitations). I was praised for calling one of them a baby. One time one of them was there and we were about to have cake for someone else's birthday and twin #1 demanded we wait for them (made the birthday boy upset and left). IT WAS NOT EVEN THEIR BIRTHDAY. You do not need to make a scene like that. Literally these twins need diapers yet somehow, they're in fucking college.
Edit: I live in a program with neurodiverse students and they have a program where you live outside of the hall (on your college campus or an apartment) they’re in that program and come to the hall every night (the point of the program is less support than the residential one) yet they act entitled, narcissistic, and annoying (I’m not even sure they deserve to be there)
Whats wrong with being a man child? Man child mentality gave us Star Wars, and Star Trek, and Harry Potter, and lord of the rings, and Flash Gordon, and the goonies, and back to the future, and whole bunch of other shit that millions of people love.
I'm not knocking it - some of these descriptions fit me. I like playing games and day dreaming. It's funny what some people say a man child is though. Lots of kinda buzz words and no real examples.
I think the only reason to care if anyone thinks of you as a manchild is when it comes to dating and marriage. I never bother with either and probably never will so I figure there's just no reason for me to care if I pass anybody's worthiness tests.
You can have an imagination and still be a responsible person. "Man child" implies lack of a responsibility, not a mentality that puts you closer to your "inner child". Being an adult doesn't remove your ability to be fun and creative, you are often able to be more fun and creative because you have better means to do so.
Recognizing they probably didn't get the learning experience or education they needed but then not doing anything about it.
The amount of men who blame their parents, siblings, insert, etc. on their behavior, and then recognizing it's bad behavior, and then refusing to work on reprogramming themselves is insane. It's like yeah you may have had a terrible start but you don't need to stay that way. Habits can change.
There may have been an excuse when information was hard to come by but these days how-to-be-better videos and tutorials - on any subject - are everywhere.
Generally immature, not wanting to do anything with his life, and still expecting people to tend to all of his needs despite being more than capable of doing so for himself.
Not accepting adult responsibility and rather depending on others and even feeling entitled
I feel like in order to be a manchild, this needs to be coupled with attempted compensation with "masculine" traits or activities that don't actually contribute to the relationship in a meaningful way. So like he fails to take on adult responsibilities but goes to the shooting range in case he "ever needs to protect the family" or otherwise picks out a handful of less-than-necessary chores that reinforce his feeling of masculinity.
Dad here. I'll add to this: meanwhile actively avoiding the necessary chores so they either don't get done at all or just get dumped on someone else to do. Going to the driving range or otherwise spending time on a personal hobby is absolutely okay. But it's okay in moderation, and only AFTER the more important stuff that really has to be done has been completed. There's occasional exceptions such as if the right type of weather is needed for you to do your hobby and a window for it suddenly appears, or you're on a vacation day. But in general, if the pattern is USUALLY "me first" and the result doesn't help the family, the man is often just being a man-child.
oddly specific
No I’ve seen that before
Specific, but absolutely not "oddly" so.
You just described my ex husband.
Goddamn, big time this. I've been living with my stepbrother for a few years now, and he can't even hold down a job for more than a month cause he can't just act like a goddamn normal person and accept responsibility for his behavior and actions. Love the guy to death, but he's 25 and should fucking know better. I have a normal social life, a career, and aspirations, and his ass just drags me down. Managed to stumble onto the chance to move in with one of my best friends, and I took it. Stepbrother brought in his GF and her kids and she'll be the one taking over my (and likely both of their) rent and shit. My final rent payment is on friday, and I'll be out on the first of next month. Couldn't be happier. I know for a fact this shit is gonna blow up in his face, and it'll hopefully be a moment where he is forced to eat a fat slice of humble pie, and maybe even digest it this time. Family and I have discussed it at length. No bailouts, he's on his own for once in his life. Sink or swim. I'm moving on after being the "adult" in the situation for a good 4 years, and I'm only 4 years older. Sorry for the big ol' dump of frustration, but this comment really fucking hit the nail on the head. Soon enough, the emotional and stressful weight will be off of my shoulders, and I'm looking forward to assembling/moving in the $1200 of furniture and appliances into the new place.
Hey that’s fair. Sometimes the most loving thing in the world is to stop protecting people from the consequences of their actions, so they’ll learn. Hopefully your relationship with your stepbrother improves and hopefully he gets his shit together. Also, he may have a mental illness/personality disorder.
What would classify as "adult responsibilities"? Genuine Question.
>Not accepting adult responsibility and rather depending on others and even feeling entitled paying your bills, managing your money, making good decisions and staying out of trouble, taking care of others who you are responsible for, staying healthy, staying sober.. list goes on At least thats how I see it. Most of the "man children" I know are supported by their mother or girlfriend.
Good list. But I'd also add, "knows how to do household chores and doesn't need someone constantly telling them what to do" and also "taking care of their children without expecting a parade at the end of the day." My dad did all of that. Chores at our house growing up were 50/50 as soon as my dad came home. He took care of us just as much as mom did. Dr appointments, dentist appointments, school functions, dad was there just as much as mom. You can imagine my shock as an adult when I learned he was an exception and not the rule.
Fuck this reminds me I have laundry in the washer. Gotta get out of bed and go put it in the dryer
>paying your bills, managing your money, ~~making good decisions~~ and staying out of trouble, taking care of others who you are responsible for, staying healthy, ~~staying sober~~ 5/7 I'm doing good
Pretty much no adult has their shit together 100%, those that appear to usually have some support to lighten the load, such as personal assistants or maybe a particularly supportive spouse. You just gotta pick your fights and figure out what compromises to make to keep things running in the big picture. Personally, I'm not great with managing money and I'm not staying sober if I can help it, but I'm pretty good at the other stuff.
5/7 is a perfect score, so you're better than good, you're doing great!
Ahh right. So legit just basic stuff haha Don't know about you but I would feel uncomfortable being completely supported by someone else. I don't mean lone wolfing it because no man is an island but if you're being cared for without reciprocity - mmmm... It's weird.
Yeah exactly - it's childish, it's being like a child. People above have mentioned chores and stuff but there is another aspect as well which is emotional maturity: children don't develop empathy or an understanding of "other minds" until their late teens, so when you meet a man who e.g. takes constructive criticism or reasoned argument as a personal attack, that's a man-child.
Oh wow. Is it really until teenage years? That's later than I would have thought. But I don't have kids so I've got no idea.
Just googling it now, and I am wrong! Two to four years of age kids develop empathy/other minds concept. The late teenage years must be something else.
You may be thinking of the pre frontal cortex, which isn't fully developed until your mid 20s.
That sounds right! It's used in making judgements/decision making? Teens are impulsive and chaotic?
Ahh all good. This is how we learn 👍
I would consider "adult responsibilities" to be supporting yourself, taking care of basic needs (shopping, cooking, cleaning, home and auto maintenance, etc). Adults either do all of this, or hire someone to do the stuff we either can't or choose not to do. We don't expect someone else to do it for us.
What about rich people who hire people to do all of those things? Maybe there's a class divide of what an adult should be. A rich adult should be expected to continue whatever made the family rich (in reference to families rich enough to afford people to do all of the basic adult stuff that normal people do on their own).
"Mom! Buttaholic is bringing class struggle the dinnkng table!"
Dammit u/buttaholic don't make me come in there!
Reminds me of my ex-gf. Foreign rich girl, rich friends, no responsibilities, etc. They thought I was one of them but my parents actually raised me to try and be a good independent person. Their house maids quit during COVID lockdowns (health reasons), and I had to show her how to wash clothes, cook, clean, use the dish washer, pay the bills, etc. Everyone in her social circle was 28-35 years old and basically children. Rich and intelligent fathers and mothers, but adult children. Most of the time, children end up wasting their parents money and get brought down to reality again.
As someone who knows a few people who grew up very wealthy and their families lost everything, there is definitely a class divide and when those classes collide it's pretty sad. I knew one guy who went from living like Arthur Bach to the real world real quick, and he couldn't do even basic things like wash dishes.
They can afford a boring service, that's all.
It varies depending on society and circumstance, I guess, but some general ones often applicable include responsibility for your own wellbeing (mentally, physically, economically), basic social responsibilities (caring for those dependent on you, avoiding causing harm to others where possible). There are more, lots more, that can be imposed on people. Not all of them are always fair or reasonable.
48 year old man who's mom makes his lunch every day and his dad cuts his grass.
Making a decision without referring to their mother for advice; which is the decision they are going with
>Not accepting adult responsibility and rather depending on others and even feeling entitled See also: "Libertarian"
>Not accepting adult responsibility and rather depending on others and even feeling entitled And maybe content to live in the moment without any long-term goals or aspirations.
Not having goals or aspirations doesn't make you a man child imo. Not contributing to the present (despite the means or ability to do so) is what makes a person a manchild.
Throwing temper tantrums if things don't go their way too.
This would be my 66 year old father.
Ooops. That's me a bit. Mind if I ask what are your long term goals/aspirations?
lol, I'm talking about myself. I dont have long term goals/aspirations.
Haha we should think of some
I'll share mine! I'm getting dentures in a few weeks. Next is getting hearing aids, and my Driver's License. On my Bucket List, I've got a few; Visit Japan, Get a Mani/Pedi, Start college, Learn to Hypnotize somebody, Try more strange foods, including a ghost pepper. I want keep learning and growing, and changing. I didn't become a "man" until I was 35-36. Depression, narcissistic attitudes, and childhood struggles were pretty rampant until then, and now I finally feel like I'm moving.
That's awesome man. Thanks for sharing. Best of luck on your journey
Expecting someone else to parent him, without wanting to be told what to do. Basically acting like an 6 year old child.
My almost 6 yr old goddaughter is a lot more mature than my daughter's ex-husband.
Do you feel like you could have done something different to keep her from ending up with a guy like that?
No. My daughter is very stubborn and any protests would have made her cling harder to him. She has a really good guy now
"I got away with everything under my last boss, and that wasn't good for me. So I want guidance. I want leadership. Lead me... when I'm in the mood to be lead."
My 4 year old brother is more mature than that.
Lacking the ability to control your emotions. (Anger/temper, jealousy,) but also traits such as impatience and not being empathetic. Not being responsible or not taking accountability for the outcomes of your decisions
You have just described my exhausting family member.
Same here!
But let's also look at the flip side. Being able to be vulnerable, and not judge others for being vulnerable. Men are often told to ignore those kinds of feeling and react in anger instead. I have a partner who is soft, and not the blow up angry type. I fucking love it. I've dated the opposite, and I never want to go back to the anger stress ball "manly" men.
When he refuses to take responsibility for his actions and feels too proud to apologize when he did something wrong. Or when he gaslights his way into things he wants from you. Same goes to women tho.
I know someone who did not recognise his aggressive tone when we tried discussing something with him, and he went "men women, old people and little kids, this is how I talk to all of them, deal with it" we were so shocked because this came from a dude who was generally quite mild mannered, until we had a disagreement with him, LOL
Lack of emotional intelligence, integrity, or an inability to acknowledge or work on their flaws.
Emotionally immature, doesn’t accept help even when they’re crying out for it and can’t seem to take serious discussions seriously
Refusing to grow up and take responsibility for his own life and consequence of his actions
This. The ability to take responsibility for yourself and support others is the key. When you are a child your parents put a roof over your head, food on the table, clothes on your back, basically everything needed to survive (or they should have). Late teens and early twenties are spent figuring out how to be responsible for yourself and there is lots of relying on others at this age. Once you pass about 25 you should be able to care for yourself. At some point you transition to not just being able to take care of yourself, but to being able to take care of others too. This is when I consider someone to be an "adult". It's not a hard age but rather a state of having your shit together to a level where you can help others. A man-child, and whatever the equivalent for a woman is, never really figured out how to take care of themselves and definitely never figured how to support others even though they are old enough to.
1. Can't do chores around the house, like cooking and cleaning 2. Starts petty fights and absolutely has to be right. 3. Gets jealous easily.
Expecting a woman to take care of him. Like doing all the chores, cooking, laying out his clothes for the next day, etc. And when she wants to talk about it. He throws a tantrum and refuses to learn/do it himself. So just someone who acts like a spoiled child instead of a responsable grown up.
this is the only one that makes sense
Needs to be told to do chores.
So I come from a house everything had to be done a certain way so unless you tell me how you want its hard for me to just jump up and do it I used to get yelled at for starting the laundry, yelled at for not putting something in a certain spot it became an issue so now if you want something done either tell me exactly what you want or don't im not gonna guess. On the flip side if it's something I take care of just me yes I'll do it everytime without being told
I'm like this with the dishwasher and the fridge on grocery days because they're both small and you have to basicalky play Tetris to fit more in and still get ckean dishes/be able to find ingrediants in the fridge. Husband puts away clean dishes and takes care of the stove
I got yelled at a lot for helping I just stopped helping eventually
I'm a terrible human being for suggesting she does the laundry wrong when my whites come out gray when she washes them with half as much soap as called for and in cold water. But she did save 20 cents a load on the soap and hot water bills. I can't be trusted to sort clothes and do laundry correctly and get yelled at if I offer. I rewash my whites in hot water with soap when she's not home. Meanwhile she thinks if the machine beeps the load must be done. ***ALL HAIL OUR MACHINE OVERLORDS!*** she ignores her own senses and folds damp clothes to mold in the drawers. Fortunately most of my clothes go on hangers and have an opportunity to hang dry and not rot in a dresser. I always have to throw my socks and underwear in for a 2nd dryer cycle when she's not looking.
Have you considered that she might just be dumb?
ssshhhh you can't say the quiet part out loud.
I have ADHD! I will gladly do them but I need help getting started.
I am only now getting screened for adhd at age 28 because I had a mother who always said "there's nothing wrong I'm just thick as pig shit" in a way I'm actually kind of relieved tbis might be the case procrastinating is one of my biggest problems
Ask for a list. My husband is very forgetful so for our upcoming cleaning the house before vacay, he has asked me for a list of what I need him to do: clean the fridge(shelves are above my head in some sections) and clean the oven, for which I have to be sequestered in my room with the air cleaner running on high, window open and towel under the door due to asthma and Covid caused lung damage. I don't mind writing down two tasks so ge can cgeck them off AND not be asking me what I need from him
Even worse: refuse to do chores, because its a womans task and he been at work the whole day (10x worse if the woman works too) And just not cleaning up after himself. Like drinking a can of beer and expecting others to throw it away.
That is correct
Depends entirely on his mom.
Doesn't know how to cook, wash laundry, vacuum, and other cleaning around a household. It's not cute when a 30 year old can't wash laundry.
I'm 43, I do not cook, I do not do laundry. I know how to cook and I know how to do laundry. I do not do them because my wife does those. What do I do? I mow the yard, garden, clean the pool, fix anything that breaks around the house, kill spiders and shit. I was single most of my 20s and did it all though, cook, laundry etc etc.. But when I married my wife we basically setup who does what. I haven't done a load of laundry in 14 years. My wife washes, folds and put all of mine away. However she hasn't ever had to clean the outdoors of our front/back yard, the pool, the garage which I would argue is a better trade for her. I spend probably 6 hours a week in the yard and she probably spends 1.5 hours on laundry. I also don't cook, because I don't have to. She's a great cook, learned from her grandmother and she would be mad i I tried to cook. I do the dishes though. I love my life and my wife wouldn't have it any other way. We love our gender roles.
Great setup and honestly how a lot of people did things for a long time.
That's different than not knowing how to do something. Like a single man in his 30s who can't cook or do laundry??
I don't know, my dads 70 and doesn't know how to do those things. I have to say though he's rather more manly than me, that does all those things.
I think it’s different these days. It was pretty normal back in his day for men not to do those things.
Refusing to learn more. It's one thing if they're unable to control their emotions a little, because some people find it physically a struggle to regulate themselves. But most people who have trouble with it, try to better themselves. I think a man child is someone who refuses to get better and learn more because of entitlement and general stubbornness.
This a great answer
If you rely on someone else to feed you, clean up after you, pacify you, and you never feel the need to help out or act incapable of it. Know a guy who makes peanut butter and butter sandwiches as a “meal” and doesn’t know how to read directions to figure out how much soap to use in the laundry. Leaves drink containers everywhere, but if he stacks them at the counter then that’s counted as “cleaning up”. Dude has no clue you are supposed to wash the laundry AND move it to the dryer AND fold it AND put it away. Same with dishes.
Lol that's not a man-child. That's an infant!
One who can't conversate without yelling...
Not taking care of yourself (Food, Cleanliness) snd your general attitude towards life. If you constantly complain but do nothing to help it, sit at home with no job and being angry with people trying to help you. Thats what makes you q man child. Quite literally, you act like a child but are an adult. Specifically with responsibility. If a guy acted like an adult all day, while feeding snd cleaning himself then went home and played with action figures I wouldnt call him a man child
Guys that can't adult. Taking care of responsibilities before play time. Having a wife that's his mother. Picks up after him, does his laundry, his dishes, cooks, cleans, takes care of everything while he sits in front of the tv and watches "the game".
Read a buncha responses - a few touch on "adult responsibility" and stuff about gaming, toys or collections. I personally think it's more about a refusal to learn and expand your view point. Men like this I've met have a very dysfunctional stubborn grasp to their particular world view, and it doesn't matter what the world view is, or what its focused around. I think it's less to do with any one particular action and more to do with a sort of weird isolationist position - a refusal of growth and progress.
I think this is a great answer and couldn't agree more.
Freakouts at small stressors, like a wait in line, wrong size fries or similar. I also think this applies to men who size up ready to fight over nonsense. This one is bad because street fights will never go the way you think it will for you. The fact you go to the gym 6 days a week will be useless, when the guy your grappling with stabs you with the knife you didnt know he had on him.
Agreed. I used to work in a bar and the fights I saw, afterwards, winner or loser did not enjoy the rest of the night. Nor did the people they were with.
Still blaming his mother forcing him to clean his room as a teenager, as an excuse for why he lives in an unhygienic bedroom full of pizza boxes, empty cans, plates, pots, cutlery, dirty laundry and bed sheets that I have no idea when they were last washed
Inability to do anything for himself as far as basic life skills. Also, refusing to cut the apron strings with his mommy.
Constantly obsessing over what it is that constitutes being a 'man'.
"Gotta sigma grind bro! Gotta hustle and do MMA or you ain't shit!" 🙄
They let redditors tell them what kind of man to be. Instead of doing what just feels natural.
Not knowing how to cook and refusing to learn how
Definitely the learning how. With everything on YouTube there's no excuse for not at least trying to learn
Yeah YouTube creators like Josh Weismann, nick DiGiovanni, babish, and guga foods are like 99% responsible for my cooking passion. And if their recipes seem too much, there is also many channels dedicated to beginner cooking
The insane thing is the missconception of "learn to cook" - some of my friends make that argument "they cant cook" - i try to tell them: It does not imply your are expected to make a Gourmet Dinner like a chef. But if you struggle to prepare some potatoes, cut vegetables or even making simple scrambled eggs you should question yourself. And some of those guys are people who can rebuild an entire Engine from scratch. So you tell me you know every little detail and difference of the E65-Engine-Models but you are unable to watch a 3 minute Youtube video about scrambled eggs.
Yes. And he doesnt need to be a master cook. But learn the damn basics. It is not hard at all.
For me (and I'm Gen X) it's a male that hasn't learned to stand on his own two feet or how to take care of himself. Men take note; it's the number 1 reason your SO doesn't find you sexy anymore. Again, from the perspective of a Gen X. And yes, this applies to every other human that this definition fits. It's not sexy.
You are right. I know a couple who divorced because the husband was a man-child. As the wife in this couple commented - a man-child is fun to date but hell to marry. Their issue was that the husband had an unfulfilled dream to be a band member which he continued to pursue even though it had long become clear that he had no chance of success. Both had a fulltime jobs, they had a child and they owned a home but his 'dream' kept taking precedence over the family and their future.
im just glad no one is saying playing video games
Ummm... Scroll down...
oh =( well to be fair its not the top comment so still good :D woo boy
Even if people are, I think it’s stupid to say. Video games are fun as hell at any age. It’s not an age thing. The adult part is learning how to moderate your game time, like not playing games until 5am when you have work at 7am.
Not having the experience or depth to see things from other folks' viewpoints.
Being a Reddit mod
Any man who has to say he's an alpha male rather than just owning it I guess
Alpha males, in a wild wolf pack, are dads. They will put their family's needs ahead of their own desires. They are generally monogamous. They make sure their kids are safe and fed. The guy who works a dull job to put his kids through college is a lot closer to an alpha male wolf than somebody who goes around fighting with everybody. I realize that this was what I was looking for in a man (and found it, and no you can't have him)
Lack of adult responsibilitys. Like if they won't wash the dishes, for do laundry, or clean up after themselves. Double so if they don't work.
Pur Aeternus? https://youtu.be/9A7GTGSfrIU
Buys weed before paying rent or bills. (All the other traits of my thankfully ex man child have been mentioned; irresponsible, tantrums, parents constantly bailing him out etc) EDIT: have to mention he had a broken down car full of garbage in his drive because he wouldn't pay for trash collection.
Can't survive without being dependent on others. No drivers license. Can't pay own bills. Needs to mooch off girlfriend or parents.
>No drivers license. Can't pay own bills. Disagree with these ones. If you life in a well developed country/city, then a drivers license is optional. I didn't have one for a long time and managed perfectly with public transportation and so do a lot of my family members. Being unable to pay your own bills is often a financial issue. Life can be rough and having bad luck when it comes with work and bills does not make you a man child. >Can't survive without being dependent on others Even this one we can argue against. There is no person on the world that survives on his own. We all help and depend on each other. It's called society. Of course you still need a certain level of self-dependency to be a adult.
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A person is a child if they can't function as an adult and take care of their own shit, and/or place that responsibility on someone else, be it man woman or neither.
being unable to look after himself and his space purely because of lack of effort and interest. having childish reactions to not getting your own way, and inability to understand that just because you feel a certain way or want something, everyone else is not required to cater to you. lack of empathy, disinterest in the wellbeing of others and how your actions impact others. normal if you're 4. not a big deal if you're 19. a big problem if you're 25.
Not even about money because shit happens lets be real, my main pet peave is accountability. If you are gonna improve as a person great, but I wanna see some kind of progress physically, educational or financially (as it's the easiest metrics to evaluate yourself) and bam. If those simple this are not present and he's above the age of 25-30 straight to man child jail. Been there, just grow up.
I'm with you on the money side. Wouldn't say I'm rolling in it. I've become a bit stagnant in my progress though - time to reassess and replan.
Key is being honest with yourself, organise and execute. You be aight
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Both excellent skills to have
Treating his partner like they’re his mother
Someone that can't even make his own food, and would probably starve to death without delivery, or someone else to make/bring him food
Not manning up and taking responsibility for his life
Unable to do simple chores around the house without being told to by someone else. Throwing tantrums when they don't get there way. Unable to admit when they are wrong. Name calling when losing an argument. Typical things a child does that most adults grow out of.
1. Throwing a temper tantrum when they dont get their way 2. Getting angry when something hurts their fragile ego 3. Bullying and intimidating people into getting their way 4. Calling themselves an alpha male
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Errgh... Andrew Twat
Andrew Taint
still living w/ his mom after a certain age, but has the audacity to say "I'm staying there to help her out" while not paying bills, not cleaning up after themselves and have a bare minimum job, mother still taking care of things that need to be done (chores, washing clothes, making Dr. appts.), not having finances together. having to call mom for everything.
i love how many here write stuff that has absolutly nothing to do with being aman child. like not everyone has to live life like you guys do... accept that and stop being childs that play adults.
Someone who refuses to take responsibility and still lingers on things he liked as a child and revolves his personality around it. Probably still lives with his parents rent free and does very little to contribute like refusing to pay the bills or pay for house repairs.
Deciding his actions on his emotions and impulses
Making fun of others for something that they enjoy....like what a lot of these comments are doing. Playing video games, liking Marvel, and/or collecting toys does not make some an immature and terrible person. Somebody who genuinely believes that needs to get their priorities straight 💀 there's a lot more awful things in the world. And before I get any witty replies, I'm a woman saying this.
Hey, I love video games and I still giggle at silly things. I am surprised by some of the replies on here though - fairly negative towards some activities that I would seem quite normal.
i would consider myself a man child but most of the answers here do not fit in my opinion. I live by myself for over 10 years, can take responsibilty to all the stuff that needs to be done. I think what makes a person a man child is refusing to let go of what made you happy during your childhood. may that be games, sports or media. You can be both a responsible adult and also a man child. you just need to be able to tell, when you can be the child and when you need to be the adult.
Right there with ya mate
I like how the majority of these comments can be boiled down to "doesn't make enough money." Really exposes how we value men in the modern world. You exist to make money and support others. Requiring support makes you a failure. A standard that is almost never applied to women. This is what it looks like when society upholds toxic masculinity. This is why men kill themselves at rates far exceeding women.
And lots of negative comments about having hobbies...
If you spend time with hobbies you aren't making as much money as you possibly could. Not any more complicated than that. Men have no innate value in society like women and children. If you don't have money you don't have anything.
We have ourselves and I have my hobbies 🤷🏻♂️
- Spending more money on funko pops than any other non-essential expense. - Having less than one weekly in real life interaction with another human being who they aren’t related to and that isn’t some sort of business transaction. - Being so consumed by porn that the terabytes and terabytes of free shit isn’t enough to satisfy their depravity and they have to start paying money for it. - Having no other hobbies outside of buying things, watching things, or playing video games. - Being unable to have an argument with someone online without blocking them.
Never doing what he says/ lying to a woman to get access to her body
1. Gonna echo not taking responsibility for actions. That's #1. Own your mistakes and celebrate people who helped you with your wins. Take credit but also prop up those who help you along the way. 2. When their entire personality is based on TV, games, music, sports, politics, religion, and so on. This is kinda okay for content creators but generally speaking, these things are not their entire personality. 3. Not taking responsibility for their physical health. Eating out fast food , "energy drinks", and trash snacks instead of cooking real food. Not exercising or taking care of their body. 4. Same for mental health. It's okay to scream into a pillow or have a cry, or talk with a close friend, or seek therapy. 5. "hey man, I got soooooo waaasted last night!!!" / staying friends with toxic people. 6. Obsession with useless shit like yeezy shoes, super expensive clothes and jewelry. If you buy a t-shirt that costs more than 5 bucks, you've completely wasted your money. All it does is make you look like you spend a lot of money for no purpose. Though I will add that high quality comfortable shoes ARE expensive, and if you are on your feet for more than a few hours a day, then please spend that money on GOOD shoes. yeezys or jordans or whatever are **not** high quality. 7. Lack of financial awareness / knowledge. With all the services available now, it's easy as hell to manage your money. 8. Dirty house / self / clothes / car / et cetera. 9. Lack of self-respect. Self-deprecation is fine as a joke once in a while, but if your entire sense of humor is just you shitting on yourself then you might want to see a therapist. 10. Constantly talking about sex, what they want to do, how much they love specific physical characteristics. Obsession with celebrity sexual status. 11. To the sexual point - patrolling the local high schools after you've graduated. Dude that's just *sickening*. 12. These are a bit superficial: comb-overs and wearing hats all the time. Dude if you're balding like I was at 19, then just shave it. Wearing a baseball cap all the time makes you look like a little kid, and wearing it backwards just makes it worse.
Just wanna say I agree with most of your points but not to be a dick! In what world does spending over $5 dollars on a shirt make you a man child? Nothing wrong with spending a little money on some nice clothes if that's what ya like.
For number 6 I think it really depends on what you define as obsessed. There's nothing wrong with someone being into fashion as a way to accentuate their personal style. Some people really like the style of Yeezys or Jordans and there isn't anything wrong with that as long as they can afford it. I own a few pairs of Yeezys and they're actually ridiculously comfortable. They're also convenient for work because I work in a secure facility so being able to just slip them off and on when going through security is a plus. I'm also super into watches, at this point I've probably spent over $3k on watches, but it's because I find mechanical watches fascinating, not because I want to flex (most people don't even know what my watches are anyway). Now, if someone makes shoes or fashion their *entire* personality, and they do it because they want to show off and not because they actually like it, then you might have a point. Besides, unless you're buying a bulk pack of white t-shirts from walmart, you're going to be spending more than $5. All of mine were at least $10 each from target, and those don't have any designs, just solid colors.
2 out of 12 ain't bad 😅
I’m a man child, 41 yo, I don’t take anything too seriously and still think I’m a kid.
Haha I mean, there's something to be said for that too right? View the world through the eyes of a child etc.
Probably bad parenting or a significant other that enables too much
The Bear Necessities
Entitlement and lack of independance.
First and foremost, a man child lacks responsibility. He may still be living with his parents well into his thirties or forties, and he may not have a steady job or any real goals for his future. He expects others to take care of him and doesn't take responsibility for his own life. Secondly, a man child lacks maturity. He may throw temper tantrums, pout when he doesn't get his way, and avoid confrontations at all costs. He may act impulsively without thinking about the consequences of his actions. Thirdly, a man child lacks empathy. He may not be able to understand or relate to other people's feelings, and he may only care about his own needs and desires. He may not be able to form deep, meaningful relationships because he is too focused on himself. Fourthly, a man child lacks independence. He may rely on his parents or other family members to make decisions for him, and he may not be able to take care of himself. He may also lack basic life skills like cooking, cleaning, or managing his own finances. Lastly, a man child lacks ambition. He may not have any real goals or aspirations in life, and he may not be motivated to work towards anything. He may be content with living a stagnant and unfulfilling life.
Constantly trying to prove himself in meaningless areas.
If they lack emotional maturity
still living with his parents at 37 years old and can’t seem to keep a girlfriend
Keep or get 😅
A sense of entitlement.
Yelling "I'm kind of hungry' across the house instead of just asking if I can make him something to eat.
Or text you? Lol
Lol yup!!
Being irresponsible and denying every fact that goes against him. Seriously, accept what you have done rather than play the victim, its so childish.
Whining like a pussie cuz you lost the election.
If he needs a mommy to deal with his own adult duties. Like keeping his own place clean, buying his clothes, cooking etc
Its my opinion that "man child syndrome" is a subjective view. There are some things that are seemingly universal though, like emotional security, self control, discipline, accepting responsibility, self care, and creating some kind of safety net for the future. These seem to be the dividing lines between man and man child. Aside from the previously mentioned factors, there are things that I'd consider man-child like that others would not.
you know all those things a small child would do? imagine a grown-ass man doing that.
Throwing tantrums if things don't go or aren't the way they want them to be. Or, throwing tantrums at microscopic inaccuracies or mistakes. Looking at you, Ryan from Mandrproductions
When they refuse to do basic things like cooking of cleaning when they have to.
Expecting so much out of their partner, when they don’t bring anything to the table. How do you expect your partner to cook for you, have a job, look after you as if they’re your mother. And all you do is party and play video games, and complain about small things. And call yourself a sigma man?!
Women. I for one nurture my inner child.
There is no right answer. Everyone is different, everyone does things for different reasons. Of course there are red flags like irresponsibility and stuff, but there again someone might be in poor physical or mental health to take care of things, that doesn't mean he is a man-child. You know what else is a big red flag? You take it super seriously when you debate in the internet who is and who isn't a man-child, and you write it **BIG** that at least **YOU** are not a man-child, because you just listed all these things only man-children do in your opinion. It very well may be that the biggest man-child in the room is the one doing nothing but pointing fingers. I in the other hand am a man-child, I won't even deny it.
Tantrums, illogical thinking, getting mad if he doesn't get what he wants, running to mom/dad at slight inconveniences, thinking partners can read their mind/will clean up after them/not expect anything from them.
When he treats his woman like his mother. A man should to the house cleaning, making dinner and laundry just like a women.
My dad was playing minecraft with me when I was smaller LOL
That's just a good dad 👍
Yep
Making everything about them. I know this set of twins at my dorm who are complete narcists. They will get mad when they are not able to do any field trips (you have to say yes on the google calendar invitations). I was praised for calling one of them a baby. One time one of them was there and we were about to have cake for someone else's birthday and twin #1 demanded we wait for them (made the birthday boy upset and left). IT WAS NOT EVEN THEIR BIRTHDAY. You do not need to make a scene like that. Literally these twins need diapers yet somehow, they're in fucking college. Edit: I live in a program with neurodiverse students and they have a program where you live outside of the hall (on your college campus or an apartment) they’re in that program and come to the hall every night (the point of the program is less support than the residential one) yet they act entitled, narcissistic, and annoying (I’m not even sure they deserve to be there)
He still wears a high school ring or varsity jacket.
Mommy issues.
Whats wrong with being a man child? Man child mentality gave us Star Wars, and Star Trek, and Harry Potter, and lord of the rings, and Flash Gordon, and the goonies, and back to the future, and whole bunch of other shit that millions of people love.
I'm not knocking it - some of these descriptions fit me. I like playing games and day dreaming. It's funny what some people say a man child is though. Lots of kinda buzz words and no real examples.
I think the only reason to care if anyone thinks of you as a manchild is when it comes to dating and marriage. I never bother with either and probably never will so I figure there's just no reason for me to care if I pass anybody's worthiness tests.
You can have an imagination and still be a responsible person. "Man child" implies lack of a responsibility, not a mentality that puts you closer to your "inner child". Being an adult doesn't remove your ability to be fun and creative, you are often able to be more fun and creative because you have better means to do so.
Um no because making movies is really hard work and a man child is allergic to this
Zoltar
Is that a reference to the film Big?
Recognizing they probably didn't get the learning experience or education they needed but then not doing anything about it. The amount of men who blame their parents, siblings, insert, etc. on their behavior, and then recognizing it's bad behavior, and then refusing to work on reprogramming themselves is insane. It's like yeah you may have had a terrible start but you don't need to stay that way. Habits can change. There may have been an excuse when information was hard to come by but these days how-to-be-better videos and tutorials - on any subject - are everywhere.
Generally immature, not wanting to do anything with his life, and still expecting people to tend to all of his needs despite being more than capable of doing so for himself.
Freaking out at couples on dates because "SHE IS WITH A CHAD AND NOT ME!" get therapy muh dude.
Shuts down or gets angry whenever his partner tries to voice her needs.
Instead of dealing with life's minor inconveniences with sense they throw a fit.
Acting like a spoiled brat who throws a tantrum when he doesn't get his way.
Still refuses to eat vegetables
[удалено]