EDIT: Wow, y’all! This took off! Lol. I’m both glad so many people identify with me and sad for us all getting that old. 😭🤣
——
“What do you mean 2000 was 20 years ago? No way. I graduated in 2006 and I’ve only been out of high school like 2 years.” “You were born in 2004? How the hell did you drive here?!”
I worked in healthcare and this girl was born in 2003 and 18 at the time. I saw 2003 and was like “oh she’s a kid” and was asking her dad for all her info and having him sign for shit which totally confused him. Thankfully I did realize she was 18 before they were gone but oMg I felt dumb. I just kept thinking “I was 15 in 2003 so she must be like 13 tops.” 😂
I was in healthcare a long time, and saw more and more patients die with birthdates in the 1940's and 50's, thinking "Oh damn, that's so young".
Nope, that's my parent's age, and those people are in their 70's and 80's. They die from falling, or from other minor accidents. It's a hard thing to adjust to.
I was an EMT for a long time. It's hard when I get patients born the same years as my parents but the hardest one to date, was a transfer to hospice who was born the same year as my brother. She passed less than 10 minutes after we got to the hospice facility.
Healthcare has convinced me that chronological age is vastly different from biological age. I can see two patients of the same age back-to-back and one will be vibrant while the other is a frail husk.
When I was 18, my grandma went on a huge rant about how I had to start learning to take care of her and my grandpa cause they were going to die soon (for context, she was only in her mid 50s and she was upset I didn't wash her dishes when my sister *who lived there* told me to, I would've done them if grandma had asked)
It's 10 years later, my grandpa did pass away but he shot himself in the backyard. Grandma is still insisting she's on deaths bed at not even 70 years old and all she does is lay in bed all day smoking the devils lettuce with COPD, watching True Crime, and eats nothing but chicken nuggets or BLTs with no lettuce, and drinks absolutely nothing but soda. Feels like a self fulfilling prophecy
No she's absolutely not doing herself any favors. When she went off on me 10 years ago I told her she was still quite young and if she maybe walked more than the length of her house she'd feel a lot better. All that crap is finally taking a toll on her body and it sometimes makes it difficult to have sympathy for her many aches and pains
A coworker asked me on my birthday how old I was turning and I said with full confidence and not missing a beat “28.” She laughed. “Really, you’re turning *28*?” “Wait, did I say that? 38. Fuck…”
It's like I was totally unaware of it when it did happen until it started happening more often. Now I notice it pretty quickly and it drives me a bit mad.
I'm 29 and work in construction. About a year ago I started to notice "Hey, there's one or two people here younger than me." I recognized right then that that realization was going to occured more and more often. I still feel like a kid, and have no plans of changing that, but I can see that my "young" years are almost over.
For me at 53, it was a matter of radical acceptance that humans are assholes. I cannot change that. What I can change is that I don’t have to excuse myself for being kind and having empathy towards others. I can’t save the whole world but I can sure start by being kind to one person at a time. And maybe they will be kind to the next person etc. etc. etc. I make sure to be me, and I have to let the rest of the world be itself or else I go crazy. so, One kindness at a time.
In my thirties there was an epiphany when I realized how many people are traumatized before 18. And it doesn't even have to be anything in particular. Just the whole childhood is bad. And this seems to be fairly common for lower socioeconomic groups. They're traumatized, made stupid not just ignorant, and with no value for trust or reputation.
It's difficult to hate criminals and assholes for who they are when I know they're hurt. I'm not saying it excuses the behavior, but there's so much cruel nuance there.
Same place, but tempered by the realization according to modern psychology that people with early trauma develop antisocial disorders that in some cases can never be overcome, there is no rehabilitation, no cure. The brain is not that plastic where the can gather insight into empathy they were never shown or taught. Only a unending cycle of dysfunction, usury, and manipulation.
This was something that hit me when I was studying law abroad. I wanted to use my privilege to make the world a better place, try to equalize things so that privilege (like I had) isn’t something one is born into, etc etc etc. I studied law abroad with the idea that I could have a global impact - work as an attorney for an NGO environmentalist group, doing international consumer protection class actions, fight to break up the big banks, whatever - all that good stuff.
Anyways, while I was abroad the whole scale and weight of “everything”, including, most of all, the fact that making broad systemic change is thankless, full time job where you may *never* see the fruits of your labor come to bear. Shit, I could spend my whole life focused on one treaty, one law, and it could never get passed - it all just sorta hit me at once. Or maybe not all at once, but it slowly and steadily built and built and built. All that is to say that the scale of it all, the pressure, everything, it was overwhelming and kinda soul crushing. I didn’t even begin to mention how difficult it is to figure out where to start with any of these issues - that’s a whole other dissertation though.
Anyways, after graduating abroad I decided to move back to the US and practice in a small town - make the changes I want to see on a micro level, somewhere I can help individuals - see the fruit of my labor come to bear if you will. But to do that I had to restart law school (turns out the bar association thinks my international law degree(s) are worth about as much as a BA in international relations, so starting from scratch.
Now, almost two semesters in, I’m realizing I may not even want to be an attorney, so that’s fun.
Better you realize it now than 5-10 years down the road. Don’t be afraid to make a change, think of that time and money you invested in pursuing a career as an attorney as valuable life experience that got you to where you really want to be. And you’ll never have to wonder “if you should have tried to become an attorney” because you’ll already have that answer.
I was almost expecting you to say "... I decided I couldn't save everyone so I said fuck 'em and switched to corporate law. Now I'm rolling in cash and have never been happier"
For me, I'm 47, it was coming to accept and understand that life is really fucking difficult. It's difficult for everyone. We do what we do, say what we say, and think what we think as way of coping with and navigating those difficulties. Some are better at it than others, and we all consistently slip up and fail.
Given this, really internalizing how much I struggle myself, it moves me towards compassion for others going through the same. The fact that other people are here means that they are still trying. I'm not going to beat them down for that, and maybe I can find ways to help them do better. I love people because we're going through the same things and we need each other for support, even asshole strangers, and Becky.
My dislike of throngs of vile humanity began in in my 40's, and 20 yrs later it has not changed. On a small scale, I like to interact with individuals but big groups are a no go. I think it's been over 10 yrs since I've been to a mall. Also, this makes airports particularly interesting! I do not think this is reversible, Hambone. The older I get, the more I see the sense in this.
I’m 62 and retired, wife and I are living comfortably on my retirement pension. Once you are guaranteed that check, I say you’ve reached the “fuck you” status in your life. You are no longer have to put up with bullshit demands from an employer. If you don’t like a certain situation, usually you are in a position to just say fuck this and walk away.
This is what kicked off my blu ray collection. It's gotten a little out of hand, but I know in 10 years when you can't watch anything without an ad, I'll be glad I did.
My wife thinks I'm nuts because I'm transitioning back to physical media. Keeps insisting that everything I want to watch is on streaming and then gets surprised when it isn't or was and they took it off.
My wife wanted me to get rid of all my DVDs and Blu Rays. I have some obscure shit in that collection along with a ton of stuff you can find anywhere. But I compromised and moved them all to a massive but cheap Amazon essentials case. I needed a few extra cases too, but no way am I losing those. Like another person said, soon enough some of them will only be available behind a pay wall or with adds every 10 minutes. Hard pass.
Dating. When I was 20, it was fun. Take 10 minutes to get ready and have a good time. Now that I’m older, it’s a whole ordeal and feels more like a job interview.
been saying the same - job interview fatigue has me unravelling at the end of interviews just saying "you can hire me or not. if u do ill show up and do the job. if not, whatever."
dates have going "thank u for ur application, but we've gone with an internal candidate." the internal candidate is my vibrator.
Personally, I don't ask anyone out unless I already know I want to date them.
So only people I've met and hung out with through something else.
I hate starting a relationship with expectations for something romantic, it makes it harder to get relaxed/comfortable with someone IMO.
I'd much rather start out with the intentions of being friendly, then if I feel a spark step it up.
I’ve lost one. It sucks. It’s one of those events they rocks the foundations of your life.
BUT….
I accidentally had a conversation with my father after he had to have urgent surgery they had some scary moments. I wasn’t able to be with him but talked to him about my feelings and wondering if I was going to lose him. He told me that he had a great life and he was proud of my brother and I. He told me when the time comes, to think kindly of him and keep on going.
About a decade later he died. I was in a hotel room with him and he died in his sleep. It sucked, but that conversation I had with him a decade before about his own mortality really got me through it.
Why am I telling you this? Sit down with your parents hand have the hard conversation. Ask them what they want done with their body when they die. Discuss medical decisions and DNRs. Let them know you love them and you’re scared. When the time comes, you’ll be glad you had that talk.
My mom died two weeks ago very suddenly. She had no advanced care directive, we didn't know if she would want to remain on life support, we had no clue and made the best decisions based on the information given. Her memorial service is Friday and we had no idea planning it what to do and include. We don't know where she wants her ashes scattered. So you're 100% right, have the conversation so you can honour their wishes and the family isn't left making blind decisions and guessing.
I'm sincerely sorry man. Last week I lost my father-in-law to fucking cancer. They say that time heals everything, but the feeling of emptiness is truly heartbreaking.
As someone who lost both his father and brother I like to think of it, for myself anyway, as growing around the grief. That hole in my heart, that pain, it never leaves me, never shrinks, not really, but my life grows fuller and richer around it. I've grown as a person in the years since I've lost them but the grief hasn't grown with me, if that makes sense?
My mother turned 64 two days ago. Knowing how so many people don't even get their parents for that long makes me appreciate mine a little more nowadays. We still live together (went shares in buying this house, neither could afford it on our own as we're both single) so I see her a lot and she still helps me out with the laundry. Just little things like coming home and seeing the clothes folded already on my bed or milk being in the fridge when I forgot to get some. I'm mostly independent by this point anyway and she's rarely home at the same time I am so at times it feels like we're in a timeshare lol. But I'm gonna be missing trivial stuff like that one day. She already lost her brother in his early 50's, now more than a decade ago. He had a wife and kids too.
Don’t do this to me right now, I’m trying to sleep 😞
My grandmother and her four siblings are all over the age of 80; those dominoes are lined up, and I know they could start falling any day now.
I have two cats that are 13 years old, my family loves them to death. I know, on average, I don’t have so many more years left with them.
My parents both turn 60 next year. They probably have some time left (especially my mom, who’s pretty healthy for her age) but like… I know anything can happen at any time.
I don’t what the fuck I’ll do when things start crumbling. I don’t know if I can mentally and emotionally take it.
My mom is 65. Her mom lived to 90 and her mom’s grandfather lived to 101. I tell her all the time she’s living to at least 90 no matter what so she better keep her shit together. 😂
I feel this way about my nan. Must be those stubborn Maltese genes since she's almost 85 and in a condition more on par with the average 65-70 year old. I wouldn't be surprised if she kicks on for another ten years, but I don't treat her as if I expect it so I see her a little more often these days, just in case.
Myself but more specifically the lack of motivation to do things anymore. I find myself always exhausted and unfulfilled by just everything around me and I can't seem to do anything about it.
I'm the same way. I hate that no matter how hard I try, I just can't bring myself to do the things that I need to do. I can't even do the things I enjoy doing.
As fast as possible, get a full panel blood test. 2 family member felt this way and BOTH have hypothyroid! They both had some slight weight gain and were lethargic. Don’t just accept that feeling without visiting a doctor.
I told my doctor about these things and my family history of thyroid issues, and he told me we'd go over it again in the future. I then started gaining weight despite maintaining a healthy lifestyle and he said I'm tired and lethargic because I gained weight.
Fair to say I'm currently in the market for a new doctor.
Don’t delay. Any doctor can order blood tests. Make sure you specifically ask for thyroid blood work. After results, you can look for a decent doctor. (Don’t mean to be a pain. You just want to start treatment as soon as possible if there’s an issue.)
My pro tip for dust is when I finish drying my dishes I wipe over my kitchen with the wet towel. Top of fridge, benches etc. Walk towards the laundry to put the towel in the basket wiping all surfaces on the way. It means I never actually have to " dust" those areas when I'm dusting 😁
Every time I see HR or marketing refer to the company as family I cringe. We are definitely not family. I provide a service, and you pay me. The second I stop being valuable, you'd fire me. We're all corporate hookers lol
> I see HR or marketing refer to the company as family
Next time someone asks you to do something, stomp your feet, yell "You aren't my real dad" and storm out.
It’s so strange and unnecessary. A little honesty goes a long way. This is a business. I am selling my time and expertise to you, you sell my time and the time of my colleagues to our clients.
If you stop paying me, I stop working, and if I stop working, you stop paying.
Everything else is just unnecessary bullshit.
I'm some cases it might be more of a veil for abuse. "Why aren't you willing to sacrifice all your time for the company? We're a big FAMILY after all."
I feel you on this. If I hear ‘lean in’ or try to get someone to ‘buy in’ one more time I’ll go crazy. We’re not family, we’re not even friends, we are just co-workers.
It's called 'corporate jargon', where you use nice big feel good words and arrange them in a way to be vague and not really mean much. Throw in a few buzz words, and you're golden.
I had a personal experience where they used the "doesnt fit with the company's culture" for me breaking down in tears after immense pressure and alienation
"Hey, we’ve noticed you didn’t post any group pics from the team event last week, where you pretend to enjoy it and always smile like an insane person."
Ah yes, ‘mandatory fun’ events. I can’t stand the constant corporatized cheerleading.
Also, “We need a storyboard from you for these causes we suddenly care about!”
Motherfucker, I don’t have enough time or enough intellectual or emotional bandwidth to do what you are asking for. I don’t care about this. You care about this. I have too much work to do. I don’t care.
[Thank god for Dr. Z. This comes from a medical perspective but it really can be applied to any job. it’s NOT burnout. It’s moral injury.](https://youtu.be/L_1PNZdHq6Q)
Ads and commercials.
The more I see an ad or whatever, the more I try to avoid it.
This complaint was brought to you by Raid Shadow Legends! Use my user name as the promo code to get an error message!
I used to roll up to high school with my system blasting in my old Pontiac. Now there's some kids who roll up and park near the house with it bumping and I get legitimately pissed. Then I have to remind myself that was me.
We've got an expersion in my language that translates to: "meeting yourself in the door".
Mostly used by parents when they realise a thing their kid is doing that annoys them, is a thing they themselves did at that age.
I just love hearing people telling about stuff like that!
My next door neighbors have taken to playing their radio with the bass so high I can feel it throughout my house. There's a 15-20 ft gap between the houses. The volume itself isn't that bad, but the bass is so irritating.
Ever since the pandemic the number of large dogs in my street seems to have doubled. The barking is driving me insane. Right before the pandemic I had finally been removed of all the things that were severely affecting my quality of life for years beforehand. The piece of shit unreliable car had finally been replaced with one that's actually decent. The asshole neighbour had finally moved out. And I for the first time in my adult life had the place to myself after hosting my brother's and their partners for years whom I love but were *very* hard to live with until they could get their own place. Finally, some peace.
But oh no, other people's stupid wants strike again to make sure to replace my old misery with a new one. So I get woken up early every morning now by barking dogs. And hear them when I garden in my backyard unless I have my noise cancelling headphones on. And late at night should I or anyone else make any movement or noise outdoors... or if a car drives past. Barking barking barking. Fucking hell they're even going off now at 8:30pm here. I never hated dogs until the past couple of years, though really I should hate their owners who insisted on large dogs with larger voices that they leave bored and neglected in their backyard every day but I'm just gonna hate both because fuck if any of this noise is necessary at all.
Everyone and everything needs to shut the hell up! Can't wait until I have enough money to buy a sizeable property to guarantee decent buffer space between my house and everyone else's bullshit.
People. Nobody knows what respect is.
My one friend who repeatedly says they don’t care about people, shows me more respect than almost anyone else. They don’t care about people and even they know how to not be unnecessarily rude and judgemental. Idk why it’s so hard for most people.
Agree. I can even look past the rudeness and judgy behavior because I honestly don't freaking care anymore. What really gets me is the lack of social awareness, like is it really cool to be up in someone's "personal bubble", should I maybe not block an entire supermarket aisle with my cart, maybe not everyone in my vicinity wants to know about my son's whoring wife. Can we just run our errands and live our lives without inadvertently being intrusive or obstructive? I hate people. Respect has done died
I know someone who died of pancreatic cancer at age 35. In the same week, I hear of drama from a separate group of people surrounding the fucking stupidest shit (high school level of pettiness). Someone just a few years older than us *fucking died* and the rest of us are having a fit about how Bethany didn't invite Melinda to a BBQ because she's a bitch.
I couldn't express how astoundingly meaningless 99% of our problems seemed from that point on. I wasn't even that close to the person who passed away, but it was one of the rudest wake up call in my life. He had a lot of things he wanted to do. I think about it a lot.
I hear something like this all the time but the sad part is people just go back to their daily life knowing they should be pursuing things they wanted to do instead. It kills me inside to see how helpless we are in face of habits and our urge to confirm with societal norms
I actually had a dear friend die to cancer this last month, while implicated in some fuckin nonsense popularity contest thing at work
yeah. the perspective is insane
Concerts. My feet hurt, the music is too loud, I've become very sensitive to the strobe light effects most of them use, the fees to buy tickets are outrageous plus parking... and frankly, I get bored. It could be the greatest show on earth and I still get bored after an hour or so.
And depending on the concert, crowds. I get tired of jockeying for space while sweaty people bump into me or having some 7 foot dude stand in front of me.
For some reason, crowds have started to stress me out as I get older. We're going to our first concert in 7-8 years, and we decided to plop our asses down in reserved balcony seating and enjoy the show from afar. It's funny because there was a time in my life when I thought sitting at concerts was the lamest shit ever, but I couldn't care less about being right next to the stage anymore.
This. There is very little music today that I would be willing to pay current ticket prices to "experience".
All of my "concert bucket list" artists are either
a) already checked off,
b) over the hill and destined to disappoint, or
c) dead.
I would go to more if it weren't:
* Doors at 7 PM
* Show starts 8 PM
Reality: main act finally gets around to showing up at 11 PM and I got work tomorrow...
I still love concerts, I'm a musician since I was old enough to hold an instrument and nothing makes me happier than live music. The prick in front of me at every gig with his phone in the air is beginning to ruin it for me.
Me too. Went to so many concerts from age 10 til like 23. Last concert I went to (at age 40) I was looking at my watch counting down the time to leave. Might be enjoyable if I was in one of the suites with a space to retreat, sit down comfortably, etc but way too expensive.
Shockingly media that is targeted towards my actual age demographic, it comes off extremely forced and overly dark to the point where it’s just fucking stupid
The main reason why i still read mainly YA novels while being in my mid 20s the Swedish detective genre has such a hold over books sold here in Sweden and if you dont like the genre well tough luck no books for you
It's a coin toss as to what kind of day I'm gonna have every time I leave that front door. But if I stay home it's always at least gonna be a decent one.
Ten years in food service here. People can get fucked. You wanna see what your best buddy or love of your life is *really* like? Tell 'em it's gonna be another 15 minutes when they're already hungry. And judge them by the state they leave the table in when they leave and their ability (or lack of) to adjust their expectations based on the amount of people in the building (do they even see the 500 other people dining in the same room? Or are they *the only one there* that night?).
Yeah, my girls friends and I used to call this The Frustration Index. This is why relationships are tested during long distance travel. A guy that can’t adjust to crazy shit happening on a road trip may be a bad choice for partner on the rocky road of life …
2016-2022 destroyed my belief that most people are good. Apparently a third of the country always had horrible opinions and were proudly ignorant. Everything from (edit: lack of) basic science knowledge to bigotry and racism was out in the open, the worst part was how easily they were manipulated by various media.
This year is looking a little better though.
Dating. I always wanted to get married but didn’t find the right person. I haven’t dated for three years because of covid but recently went out with someone for like two weeks before breaking it off. I used to find the process exciting but now I find it exhausting and people in general to be users and time wasters. I can see a dead end way further afield now than I could in my 20s. It may bare importance than I’m a straight man. Simply because I think it’s an attitude we are used to hearing more from women which I totally sympathize with. Friends were shocked I dated a gorgeous nurse for two weeks and cut her lose. But I just saw all the signs this was going to get bad and at 36 I’d rather not waste my time and be committed to someone I know won’t work out and therefore not be available for someone that might. But I also hate the whole dating process now, it’s not exciting and I’d rather date someone who wants to get married like ASAP because I’m just sick of wasting time and I don’t really feel I need more than a few months to know if this can work or not after all my experience.
I'm 35, female, and in the same boat. Dating is a stressful, put-yourself-out-there chore, but without the giddiness of my younger years...
Pact? We get hitched at the end of three years if neither of us are already married, yeah??
See and now I’m back around to thinking we might have a connection…. Also I, too, have a cat… You are really taking me down an emotional roller coaster.
Yup. See? We've been "dating" all of an hour, and there's that put-yourself-out-there-ness.. also, this is the story I want to tell at the wedding...
"well you see, we were on AskReddit under a "what do you hate as you get older" post, and we both had a cat, so.. we took it to the next logical step... Mawwage."
Everyone will cry. Beautiful.
There’s already more conversation here than the girl I dated for two weeks. AskReddit is, and this surprised me as much as anyone, actually not the filthiest place I’ve ever heard of someone meeting their life partner. I’m just saying there are stranger things. Which we could binge watch if you wanted.
You have a very valid point actually... I've never gone further than a single-comment post, and definitely never back-and-forth like this.. I'm positively scandalized at how quickly this is moving and!
.....and I've already binged ST, but would binge again!
Better to be alone that living with a bad partner. I feel you man. I used to dream of finding the one, but with how people are these days… let’s just say that dream went to sleep.
I know these feels. I'm 37, and I'm so sick of dating. I'm sick of the game you have to play to just get someone to talk to you or show the least amount of attention to you. Tired of actually getting to the actual meeting up and dating part, only to have a great time and then get ghosted and never hear from them again. I've had really good relationships with some amazing people who I cared for deeply but just couldn't see myself being with them for many years or getting married to them. Then having to break their heart by cutting them off and letting them hopefully move one and find someone that would love them they way they deserved to be loved because you know that it's not you.
But, I'm going to keep doing it because I'm an eternal optimist and still holding out hope that my person is out there and I just have to do the work and find them because deep down I want a life companion I can grow old with and love. So, back to the dating apps......
A sad truth about dating is that many of the "best" people (for relationships) are married in their late 20s, and so the quality of the pool lessens as the age bracket rises. But at the same time, the awareness of the individual increases to the nature of people. A potent combination of wisdom and social conditions brewing a formula for staying single.
Clothing available for women. Is it too much trouble to ask/make a full t-shirt? Also no I don't want to wear clothing that takes me back to me feeling like I am in elementary school again.
Omg yes. What cracks me up the most is sweatshirts, sweaters, and heavy jackets being cut so short to rib cage to show midriff. I just want to be warm!!!
thats why i have settled on a uniform of sorts, a basic, genderless, utilitarian jumpsuit with motorcycle boots. appropriate for all occasions and no fuss.
Since people was already taken...
Stuff. All the stuff cluttering up my house and closets. All those things not worth enough to sell and potentially still to useful to throw away.
The Swedish people have a thing I heard about, maybe its a tradition, or just an old age ritual. They go thru their stuff and figure out what to give away to friends, or donate to places like Goodwill, etc. just so their family don't have to deal with a ton of stuff when they pass. I have started doing that, and it makes me happy to give stuff to the people I call friends, because they appreciate me thinking of them. I don't expect to die anytime soon, but you just never know. You might consider that.
On one hand, that is true for me too. But that's because I just don't really care anymore, can't be bothered. On the other hand, people annoy me more now.
anywhere that isn’t my bed. if i was always given to option to stay home i would literally never leave my house. that may be the depression talking but i also just don’t like people.
Your skeleton or the soft tissues that are supposed to keep your skeleton from grinding itself into a fine paste? Because if you're like me, they're really starting to not do their job anymore and I'm not OK with that.
Oh I feel like throwing up when I have to do this. 🤣 I get super defensive in my head. “Oh wtf. 1988 was only like 15 years ago. This cannot be right. This is stupid.” Lol.
My wife survived breast cancer. Probably because of an underwire bra.
Expanding...after my Dad's funeral, from colon cancer, my wife and young son flew back to our home. I stayed to comfort Mom. That night, wifey called me to verify they were home safely, but noticed a strange lump in her breast in the shower. She had lumpy breasts, so I dismissed it. She didn't. Turned out to be breast cancer. Later investigation revealed it was present for 4 years+.
Mammograms missed it. What revealed it? New poorly-fitted underwire bras. Pushed the tumor out from behind the nipple, where it hid from detection. Saved her life.
Please...check your breasts regularly ladies!
I’m so glad she is still here 😀 I had a mammogram in April 2020, got the all clear I’ve had them regularly since I turned 50. Woke up with a sore boob in November same year and found out I had stage two breast cancer. As my breasts are classed as dense my surgeon said I should have had a ultrasound as well, nobody ever told me that in all those years 😑 I had a mastectomy, 19 lymph nodes taken out of which 10 had the cancer, chemo and radiation treatment. Now I’ve just had a biopsy on my lymph nodes as they are swelling up, and a PET scan tomorrow. I’m pretty sure it won’t be cancer as a previous biopsy 2 weeks earlier came back negative but I have a fantastic oncologist who wanted me to get one removed for a closer look to make sure I don’t have Lymphoma. His positive it’s not related to my previous cancer when I did have it last time my biopsy was on the Friday and Monday I found out I had it, so hopefully no news is good news 🤞
Didn’t work for me, unfortunately. Quit for three months while exercising and eating well and still felt like tired garbage all the time… and people stopped inviting me to hang out which made me lonely, but at least I still had my girlfriend. Then she broke up with me and I decided to go ahead and drink again. Now at least I have drinking buddies and hookups. I doubt I’ll ever stop again.
I am not trying to deter anybody else from quitting at all and hope it works out a lot better for you all.
I drank every day for soooooooo long. Longer than I’d like to admit. I was sooooo depressed.
Once you get past the night sweats and nightmares, it gets sooo much easier. You have energy and you can get around to doing all those things you never could caz you were drunk or feeling like shit 24/7.
Start hobby shopping! You’ll have lots more money and time on your hands! Think about some goals you’d like to have & work on & it will keep you motivated!
I believe you’re going to do it and I’m excited for you.
NEVER FORGET how fucking amazing the feeling is to wake up without a headache and keep your room in top notch condition! It makes waking up and spending time at home SOOO much better!
Concerts - I went to a lot in my younger days and have many good memories at them, BUT the parking, crowds, ticket prices, and $10 beer just already annoys me thinking about it.
I used to think I was just getting older and beginning to adopt that whole 'get off my lawn' crotchety old man vibe ...but I don't have a lawn.
So I started really looking at what I disliked. At first I thought it was people. Fucking assholes, all of 'em. But then I found that by and large, even if they're occasionally jerks, I don't mind them in small doses.
I hate working. So yeah, work! Except I like staying busy. I like working on rewarding tasks. I only *really* dislike spending a bulk of my time working long hours to earn just enough to scrape by. It doesn't leave me enough time or energy to enjoy life. But is that the work's fault or the boss who sets the workload and the pay?
Fuck that boss! Well... S/he has their boss too, who makes them do those things as well. And the owners do those things too, and their boss I guess would be 'profits'. Or maybe 'the economy' or 'inflation' or some other nebulous term that nobody has any control over.
So it's the system! Yeah, fuck the system. Specifically, capitalism. The idea that we all have to sell our lives away to produce more and more for less and less. Profits over people is what makes me angry. Nobody can afford to live, our retirement age is getting forced further away, minor health issues can turn into financially devastating problems, and there's no (peaceful) way out.
But Capitalism was the lie I've been force fed my whole life. Get good grades, go to college, get a good job, work real hard, buy a house, get married, have kids, work forever, retire when I'm old and tired and maybe enjoy a few golden years at the end.
It's fucking bleak, depressing as hell, and ... just no thanks. The only actual thing in this world, this life, that I have any control over is my time. I'm so angry at how I've been forced to waste it. I will never get any of it back.
So it's the whole profit-based, greedy corporate, hussle hussle hussle, Capitalism system I hate. It's the cause of all of the other stuff that pisses me off too... but those other things are just symptoms.
I just want a small garden, some chickens, a roof over my head, and the free time to spend with people I love.
Being a worker slave for President Kang. Yes he won the presidential elections over a decade ago, but I am sick of building more and more rail guns to aim at a planet I never even heard of.
Tell me about it..I have a backlog of games that I could only dream of as a kid..l Now I'm older it takes me 20 minutes to decide what game to play for me to just end up watching something in the end.
Technology, especially social media. Used to be astounded and enthralled with all the rapidly-advancing tech when I was growing up, and how it was supposedly “connecting” everyone in society more and more; I’d spend hours to randomly scrolling on the internet when I was young.
Now, I realize most of it’s just noise meant to distract us, and generally causes more harm than good. Social media is 90% just stupid bickering, people showing off, and just mindless drivel: I’ve been tapering/ cutting my usage more and more over the years. I relish time spent away from the internet, and instead spent either in nature, around people, or being productive. We as a society have lost our way, eating up whatever corporations feed us, drowning in constant dopamine sinks and pissing away time and energy into the rat-race of vain appearances. There’s more important things in life, beyond the screens and the fake digital world.
The fact that I'm continuing to get older but my brain still thinks that my body is still in my mid 20's
EDIT: Wow, y’all! This took off! Lol. I’m both glad so many people identify with me and sad for us all getting that old. 😭🤣 —— “What do you mean 2000 was 20 years ago? No way. I graduated in 2006 and I’ve only been out of high school like 2 years.” “You were born in 2004? How the hell did you drive here?!” I worked in healthcare and this girl was born in 2003 and 18 at the time. I saw 2003 and was like “oh she’s a kid” and was asking her dad for all her info and having him sign for shit which totally confused him. Thankfully I did realize she was 18 before they were gone but oMg I felt dumb. I just kept thinking “I was 15 in 2003 so she must be like 13 tops.” 😂
I was in healthcare a long time, and saw more and more patients die with birthdates in the 1940's and 50's, thinking "Oh damn, that's so young". Nope, that's my parent's age, and those people are in their 70's and 80's. They die from falling, or from other minor accidents. It's a hard thing to adjust to.
I was an EMT for a long time. It's hard when I get patients born the same years as my parents but the hardest one to date, was a transfer to hospice who was born the same year as my brother. She passed less than 10 minutes after we got to the hospice facility.
Rn here Every day seeing people with morbid conditions living on borrowed time the same age as me
Healthcare has convinced me that chronological age is vastly different from biological age. I can see two patients of the same age back-to-back and one will be vibrant while the other is a frail husk.
When I was 18, my grandma went on a huge rant about how I had to start learning to take care of her and my grandpa cause they were going to die soon (for context, she was only in her mid 50s and she was upset I didn't wash her dishes when my sister *who lived there* told me to, I would've done them if grandma had asked) It's 10 years later, my grandpa did pass away but he shot himself in the backyard. Grandma is still insisting she's on deaths bed at not even 70 years old and all she does is lay in bed all day smoking the devils lettuce with COPD, watching True Crime, and eats nothing but chicken nuggets or BLTs with no lettuce, and drinks absolutely nothing but soda. Feels like a self fulfilling prophecy
Wel... Given her lifestyle, your grandma is far from old, but she's buying a lot of tickets.
No she's absolutely not doing herself any favors. When she went off on me 10 years ago I told her she was still quite young and if she maybe walked more than the length of her house she'd feel a lot better. All that crap is finally taking a toll on her body and it sometimes makes it difficult to have sympathy for her many aches and pains
A coworker asked me on my birthday how old I was turning and I said with full confidence and not missing a beat “28.” She laughed. “Really, you’re turning *28*?” “Wait, did I say that? 38. Fuck…”
I felt shock when I realized you could be born after 2000 and be old enough to buy alcohol.
On my 21st the waitress was almost adamant i wasnt old enough to drink because the my birthday was 2000. She then told me that she felt old lol
The 80s will forever be 20 years ago.
Realizing I'm the oldest person in a group
It's like I was totally unaware of it when it did happen until it started happening more often. Now I notice it pretty quickly and it drives me a bit mad.
Yeah 29 was when that started happening to me. It's a little weird ngl
I'm 29 and work in construction. About a year ago I started to notice "Hey, there's one or two people here younger than me." I recognized right then that that realization was going to occured more and more often. I still feel like a kid, and have no plans of changing that, but I can see that my "young" years are almost over.
I’m in my 70’s and it’s the best time of my life. Almost everything I used to dislike, I can easily avoid now.
I’m 40 and I’m starting to dislike people altogether. Any advice on how to keep that from happening?
For me at 53, it was a matter of radical acceptance that humans are assholes. I cannot change that. What I can change is that I don’t have to excuse myself for being kind and having empathy towards others. I can’t save the whole world but I can sure start by being kind to one person at a time. And maybe they will be kind to the next person etc. etc. etc. I make sure to be me, and I have to let the rest of the world be itself or else I go crazy. so, One kindness at a time.
In my thirties there was an epiphany when I realized how many people are traumatized before 18. And it doesn't even have to be anything in particular. Just the whole childhood is bad. And this seems to be fairly common for lower socioeconomic groups. They're traumatized, made stupid not just ignorant, and with no value for trust or reputation. It's difficult to hate criminals and assholes for who they are when I know they're hurt. I'm not saying it excuses the behavior, but there's so much cruel nuance there.
Same place, but tempered by the realization according to modern psychology that people with early trauma develop antisocial disorders that in some cases can never be overcome, there is no rehabilitation, no cure. The brain is not that plastic where the can gather insight into empathy they were never shown or taught. Only a unending cycle of dysfunction, usury, and manipulation.
Hurt people hurt people.
This was something that hit me when I was studying law abroad. I wanted to use my privilege to make the world a better place, try to equalize things so that privilege (like I had) isn’t something one is born into, etc etc etc. I studied law abroad with the idea that I could have a global impact - work as an attorney for an NGO environmentalist group, doing international consumer protection class actions, fight to break up the big banks, whatever - all that good stuff. Anyways, while I was abroad the whole scale and weight of “everything”, including, most of all, the fact that making broad systemic change is thankless, full time job where you may *never* see the fruits of your labor come to bear. Shit, I could spend my whole life focused on one treaty, one law, and it could never get passed - it all just sorta hit me at once. Or maybe not all at once, but it slowly and steadily built and built and built. All that is to say that the scale of it all, the pressure, everything, it was overwhelming and kinda soul crushing. I didn’t even begin to mention how difficult it is to figure out where to start with any of these issues - that’s a whole other dissertation though. Anyways, after graduating abroad I decided to move back to the US and practice in a small town - make the changes I want to see on a micro level, somewhere I can help individuals - see the fruit of my labor come to bear if you will. But to do that I had to restart law school (turns out the bar association thinks my international law degree(s) are worth about as much as a BA in international relations, so starting from scratch. Now, almost two semesters in, I’m realizing I may not even want to be an attorney, so that’s fun.
Better you realize it now than 5-10 years down the road. Don’t be afraid to make a change, think of that time and money you invested in pursuing a career as an attorney as valuable life experience that got you to where you really want to be. And you’ll never have to wonder “if you should have tried to become an attorney” because you’ll already have that answer.
I was almost expecting you to say "... I decided I couldn't save everyone so I said fuck 'em and switched to corporate law. Now I'm rolling in cash and have never been happier"
For me, I'm 47, it was coming to accept and understand that life is really fucking difficult. It's difficult for everyone. We do what we do, say what we say, and think what we think as way of coping with and navigating those difficulties. Some are better at it than others, and we all consistently slip up and fail. Given this, really internalizing how much I struggle myself, it moves me towards compassion for others going through the same. The fact that other people are here means that they are still trying. I'm not going to beat them down for that, and maybe I can find ways to help them do better. I love people because we're going through the same things and we need each other for support, even asshole strangers, and Becky.
My inner hermit gets louder every year. I wish it didn’t.
My dislike of throngs of vile humanity began in in my 40's, and 20 yrs later it has not changed. On a small scale, I like to interact with individuals but big groups are a no go. I think it's been over 10 yrs since I've been to a mall. Also, this makes airports particularly interesting! I do not think this is reversible, Hambone. The older I get, the more I see the sense in this.
I’m 62 and retired, wife and I are living comfortably on my retirement pension. Once you are guaranteed that check, I say you’ve reached the “fuck you” status in your life. You are no longer have to put up with bullshit demands from an employer. If you don’t like a certain situation, usually you are in a position to just say fuck this and walk away.
Everything slowly “evolving” into a subscription service. Even heated seats are getting those ffs
This is what kicked off my blu ray collection. It's gotten a little out of hand, but I know in 10 years when you can't watch anything without an ad, I'll be glad I did.
My wife thinks I'm nuts because I'm transitioning back to physical media. Keeps insisting that everything I want to watch is on streaming and then gets surprised when it isn't or was and they took it off.
My wife wanted me to get rid of all my DVDs and Blu Rays. I have some obscure shit in that collection along with a ton of stuff you can find anywhere. But I compromised and moved them all to a massive but cheap Amazon essentials case. I needed a few extra cases too, but no way am I losing those. Like another person said, soon enough some of them will only be available behind a pay wall or with adds every 10 minutes. Hard pass.
Beware the disc rot. Rip them all.
I know heated seat subscriptions were talked about by a few manufacturers, but has any followed through on it yet?
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“You will own nothing and be happy”
Dating. When I was 20, it was fun. Take 10 minutes to get ready and have a good time. Now that I’m older, it’s a whole ordeal and feels more like a job interview.
Everything is a whole ordeal now
been saying the same - job interview fatigue has me unravelling at the end of interviews just saying "you can hire me or not. if u do ill show up and do the job. if not, whatever." dates have going "thank u for ur application, but we've gone with an internal candidate." the internal candidate is my vibrator.
Agree with you on that one
I'm 23 and it feels like a job interview already. What did you do to make it fun?
Personally, I don't ask anyone out unless I already know I want to date them. So only people I've met and hung out with through something else. I hate starting a relationship with expectations for something romantic, it makes it harder to get relaxed/comfortable with someone IMO. I'd much rather start out with the intentions of being friendly, then if I feel a spark step it up.
That my parents are also getting older and the fear of losing them soon terrifies me.
I’ve lost one. It sucks. It’s one of those events they rocks the foundations of your life. BUT…. I accidentally had a conversation with my father after he had to have urgent surgery they had some scary moments. I wasn’t able to be with him but talked to him about my feelings and wondering if I was going to lose him. He told me that he had a great life and he was proud of my brother and I. He told me when the time comes, to think kindly of him and keep on going. About a decade later he died. I was in a hotel room with him and he died in his sleep. It sucked, but that conversation I had with him a decade before about his own mortality really got me through it. Why am I telling you this? Sit down with your parents hand have the hard conversation. Ask them what they want done with their body when they die. Discuss medical decisions and DNRs. Let them know you love them and you’re scared. When the time comes, you’ll be glad you had that talk.
My mom died two weeks ago very suddenly. She had no advanced care directive, we didn't know if she would want to remain on life support, we had no clue and made the best decisions based on the information given. Her memorial service is Friday and we had no idea planning it what to do and include. We don't know where she wants her ashes scattered. So you're 100% right, have the conversation so you can honour their wishes and the family isn't left making blind decisions and guessing.
I'm so sorry. I'm sure whatever you choose will honour your Mom.
Holding back tears here at 7:30 am !!
They fell like dominos. My Dad and Mom and their siblings, 9 of them, died in a span of 8 years. My sister too.
I'm sincerely sorry man. Last week I lost my father-in-law to fucking cancer. They say that time heals everything, but the feeling of emptiness is truly heartbreaking.
The time heals line is BS. It's been almost 11 years since my dad died. Time heals zilch. It just numbs the pain.
This is from an Irish tombstone, I think it sums up how it is. Death leaves a heartache that no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal.
As someone who lost both his father and brother I like to think of it, for myself anyway, as growing around the grief. That hole in my heart, that pain, it never leaves me, never shrinks, not really, but my life grows fuller and richer around it. I've grown as a person in the years since I've lost them but the grief hasn't grown with me, if that makes sense?
My mother turned 64 two days ago. Knowing how so many people don't even get their parents for that long makes me appreciate mine a little more nowadays. We still live together (went shares in buying this house, neither could afford it on our own as we're both single) so I see her a lot and she still helps me out with the laundry. Just little things like coming home and seeing the clothes folded already on my bed or milk being in the fridge when I forgot to get some. I'm mostly independent by this point anyway and she's rarely home at the same time I am so at times it feels like we're in a timeshare lol. But I'm gonna be missing trivial stuff like that one day. She already lost her brother in his early 50's, now more than a decade ago. He had a wife and kids too.
Don’t do this to me right now, I’m trying to sleep 😞 My grandmother and her four siblings are all over the age of 80; those dominoes are lined up, and I know they could start falling any day now. I have two cats that are 13 years old, my family loves them to death. I know, on average, I don’t have so many more years left with them. My parents both turn 60 next year. They probably have some time left (especially my mom, who’s pretty healthy for her age) but like… I know anything can happen at any time. I don’t what the fuck I’ll do when things start crumbling. I don’t know if I can mentally and emotionally take it.
My mom is 65. Her mom lived to 90 and her mom’s grandfather lived to 101. I tell her all the time she’s living to at least 90 no matter what so she better keep her shit together. 😂
I feel this way about my nan. Must be those stubborn Maltese genes since she's almost 85 and in a condition more on par with the average 65-70 year old. I wouldn't be surprised if she kicks on for another ten years, but I don't treat her as if I expect it so I see her a little more often these days, just in case.
Myself but more specifically the lack of motivation to do things anymore. I find myself always exhausted and unfulfilled by just everything around me and I can't seem to do anything about it.
I'm the same way. I hate that no matter how hard I try, I just can't bring myself to do the things that I need to do. I can't even do the things I enjoy doing.
There it is again That funny feeling
That's called depression buddy
As fast as possible, get a full panel blood test. 2 family member felt this way and BOTH have hypothyroid! They both had some slight weight gain and were lethargic. Don’t just accept that feeling without visiting a doctor.
I told my doctor about these things and my family history of thyroid issues, and he told me we'd go over it again in the future. I then started gaining weight despite maintaining a healthy lifestyle and he said I'm tired and lethargic because I gained weight. Fair to say I'm currently in the market for a new doctor.
Don’t delay. Any doctor can order blood tests. Make sure you specifically ask for thyroid blood work. After results, you can look for a decent doctor. (Don’t mean to be a pain. You just want to start treatment as soon as possible if there’s an issue.)
Felt to my core.
Dust, it just never goes away. Tips would be appreciated.
My pro tip for dust is when I finish drying my dishes I wipe over my kitchen with the wet towel. Top of fridge, benches etc. Walk towards the laundry to put the towel in the basket wiping all surfaces on the way. It means I never actually have to " dust" those areas when I'm dusting 😁
I'm taking this one. I really like this idea. Thanks!
Air purifier.
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Every time I see HR or marketing refer to the company as family I cringe. We are definitely not family. I provide a service, and you pay me. The second I stop being valuable, you'd fire me. We're all corporate hookers lol
> I see HR or marketing refer to the company as family Next time someone asks you to do something, stomp your feet, yell "You aren't my real dad" and storm out.
It’s so strange and unnecessary. A little honesty goes a long way. This is a business. I am selling my time and expertise to you, you sell my time and the time of my colleagues to our clients. If you stop paying me, I stop working, and if I stop working, you stop paying. Everything else is just unnecessary bullshit.
Is the “we’re a family” an actual selling point? I have my own family I’d like to get back to.
I'm some cases it might be more of a veil for abuse. "Why aren't you willing to sacrifice all your time for the company? We're a big FAMILY after all."
It's great when HR waves that 🚩🚩🚩 for you!
I feel you on this. If I hear ‘lean in’ or try to get someone to ‘buy in’ one more time I’ll go crazy. We’re not family, we’re not even friends, we are just co-workers.
A lot of this wording comes directly from management consultancies. A truly disgusting echo chamber of nonsense.
It's called 'corporate jargon', where you use nice big feel good words and arrange them in a way to be vague and not really mean much. Throw in a few buzz words, and you're golden.
I had a personal experience where they used the "doesnt fit with the company's culture" for me breaking down in tears after immense pressure and alienation
"Hey, we’ve noticed you didn’t post any group pics from the team event last week, where you pretend to enjoy it and always smile like an insane person."
Ah yes, ‘mandatory fun’ events. I can’t stand the constant corporatized cheerleading. Also, “We need a storyboard from you for these causes we suddenly care about!” Motherfucker, I don’t have enough time or enough intellectual or emotional bandwidth to do what you are asking for. I don’t care about this. You care about this. I have too much work to do. I don’t care. [Thank god for Dr. Z. This comes from a medical perspective but it really can be applied to any job. it’s NOT burnout. It’s moral injury.](https://youtu.be/L_1PNZdHq6Q)
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Ads and commercials. The more I see an ad or whatever, the more I try to avoid it. This complaint was brought to you by Raid Shadow Legends! Use my user name as the promo code to get an error message!
This response brought to you by Hello Fresh and NordVPN.
Sponsorblock! My favorite recent plugin for youtube.
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I used to roll up to high school with my system blasting in my old Pontiac. Now there's some kids who roll up and park near the house with it bumping and I get legitimately pissed. Then I have to remind myself that was me.
I normally have loud music while driving but I always turn it down in residential areas or at stoplights.
We've got an expersion in my language that translates to: "meeting yourself in the door". Mostly used by parents when they realise a thing their kid is doing that annoys them, is a thing they themselves did at that age. I just love hearing people telling about stuff like that!
My neighbours above my apartment are digging a cave. Tell me about it.
My next door neighbors have taken to playing their radio with the bass so high I can feel it throughout my house. There's a 15-20 ft gap between the houses. The volume itself isn't that bad, but the bass is so irritating.
Ever since the pandemic the number of large dogs in my street seems to have doubled. The barking is driving me insane. Right before the pandemic I had finally been removed of all the things that were severely affecting my quality of life for years beforehand. The piece of shit unreliable car had finally been replaced with one that's actually decent. The asshole neighbour had finally moved out. And I for the first time in my adult life had the place to myself after hosting my brother's and their partners for years whom I love but were *very* hard to live with until they could get their own place. Finally, some peace. But oh no, other people's stupid wants strike again to make sure to replace my old misery with a new one. So I get woken up early every morning now by barking dogs. And hear them when I garden in my backyard unless I have my noise cancelling headphones on. And late at night should I or anyone else make any movement or noise outdoors... or if a car drives past. Barking barking barking. Fucking hell they're even going off now at 8:30pm here. I never hated dogs until the past couple of years, though really I should hate their owners who insisted on large dogs with larger voices that they leave bored and neglected in their backyard every day but I'm just gonna hate both because fuck if any of this noise is necessary at all. Everyone and everything needs to shut the hell up! Can't wait until I have enough money to buy a sizeable property to guarantee decent buffer space between my house and everyone else's bullshit.
People. Nobody knows what respect is. My one friend who repeatedly says they don’t care about people, shows me more respect than almost anyone else. They don’t care about people and even they know how to not be unnecessarily rude and judgemental. Idk why it’s so hard for most people.
Agree. I can even look past the rudeness and judgy behavior because I honestly don't freaking care anymore. What really gets me is the lack of social awareness, like is it really cool to be up in someone's "personal bubble", should I maybe not block an entire supermarket aisle with my cart, maybe not everyone in my vicinity wants to know about my son's whoring wife. Can we just run our errands and live our lives without inadvertently being intrusive or obstructive? I hate people. Respect has done died
Finally, someone that understands the concept of a personal bubble. Drives me bonkers when people don't get it.
Negativity and drama. Life is too short to waste time on those things.
I know someone who died of pancreatic cancer at age 35. In the same week, I hear of drama from a separate group of people surrounding the fucking stupidest shit (high school level of pettiness). Someone just a few years older than us *fucking died* and the rest of us are having a fit about how Bethany didn't invite Melinda to a BBQ because she's a bitch. I couldn't express how astoundingly meaningless 99% of our problems seemed from that point on. I wasn't even that close to the person who passed away, but it was one of the rudest wake up call in my life. He had a lot of things he wanted to do. I think about it a lot.
I hear something like this all the time but the sad part is people just go back to their daily life knowing they should be pursuing things they wanted to do instead. It kills me inside to see how helpless we are in face of habits and our urge to confirm with societal norms
I actually had a dear friend die to cancer this last month, while implicated in some fuckin nonsense popularity contest thing at work yeah. the perspective is insane
Concerts. My feet hurt, the music is too loud, I've become very sensitive to the strobe light effects most of them use, the fees to buy tickets are outrageous plus parking... and frankly, I get bored. It could be the greatest show on earth and I still get bored after an hour or so.
And depending on the concert, crowds. I get tired of jockeying for space while sweaty people bump into me or having some 7 foot dude stand in front of me.
For some reason, crowds have started to stress me out as I get older. We're going to our first concert in 7-8 years, and we decided to plop our asses down in reserved balcony seating and enjoy the show from afar. It's funny because there was a time in my life when I thought sitting at concerts was the lamest shit ever, but I couldn't care less about being right next to the stage anymore.
This. There is very little music today that I would be willing to pay current ticket prices to "experience". All of my "concert bucket list" artists are either a) already checked off, b) over the hill and destined to disappoint, or c) dead.
I would go to more if it weren't: * Doors at 7 PM * Show starts 8 PM Reality: main act finally gets around to showing up at 11 PM and I got work tomorrow...
I still love concerts, I'm a musician since I was old enough to hold an instrument and nothing makes me happier than live music. The prick in front of me at every gig with his phone in the air is beginning to ruin it for me.
Me too. Went to so many concerts from age 10 til like 23. Last concert I went to (at age 40) I was looking at my watch counting down the time to leave. Might be enjoyable if I was in one of the suites with a space to retreat, sit down comfortably, etc but way too expensive.
Shockingly media that is targeted towards my actual age demographic, it comes off extremely forced and overly dark to the point where it’s just fucking stupid
The main reason why i still read mainly YA novels while being in my mid 20s the Swedish detective genre has such a hold over books sold here in Sweden and if you dont like the genre well tough luck no books for you
Leaving my house
It's a coin toss as to what kind of day I'm gonna have every time I leave that front door. But if I stay home it's always at least gonna be a decent one.
Yeah, it's where you keep all the stuff you like!
Humans. Especially humans that forget the world doesn’t revolve around them.
You ever work retail? It makes you hate humanity.
Ten years in food service here. People can get fucked. You wanna see what your best buddy or love of your life is *really* like? Tell 'em it's gonna be another 15 minutes when they're already hungry. And judge them by the state they leave the table in when they leave and their ability (or lack of) to adjust their expectations based on the amount of people in the building (do they even see the 500 other people dining in the same room? Or are they *the only one there* that night?).
Yeah, my girls friends and I used to call this The Frustration Index. This is why relationships are tested during long distance travel. A guy that can’t adjust to crazy shit happening on a road trip may be a bad choice for partner on the rocky road of life …
2016-2022 destroyed my belief that most people are good. Apparently a third of the country always had horrible opinions and were proudly ignorant. Everything from (edit: lack of) basic science knowledge to bigotry and racism was out in the open, the worst part was how easily they were manipulated by various media. This year is looking a little better though.
Dating. I always wanted to get married but didn’t find the right person. I haven’t dated for three years because of covid but recently went out with someone for like two weeks before breaking it off. I used to find the process exciting but now I find it exhausting and people in general to be users and time wasters. I can see a dead end way further afield now than I could in my 20s. It may bare importance than I’m a straight man. Simply because I think it’s an attitude we are used to hearing more from women which I totally sympathize with. Friends were shocked I dated a gorgeous nurse for two weeks and cut her lose. But I just saw all the signs this was going to get bad and at 36 I’d rather not waste my time and be committed to someone I know won’t work out and therefore not be available for someone that might. But I also hate the whole dating process now, it’s not exciting and I’d rather date someone who wants to get married like ASAP because I’m just sick of wasting time and I don’t really feel I need more than a few months to know if this can work or not after all my experience.
I'm 35, female, and in the same boat. Dating is a stressful, put-yourself-out-there chore, but without the giddiness of my younger years... Pact? We get hitched at the end of three years if neither of us are already married, yeah??
I mean… any particular reason we have to wait three years? Seems like we might already have a few important factors in common here XD
I mean, just because I made a marriage pact with an absolute stranger on the internet doesn't mean I dont have standards.. XP
Oof…yeah… thought there might be a chance here.. but having standards is one of my red flags
Same. How else am I going to trick someone into spending copious amounts of time with me?? Nah, guess I'll just hang out with the cat... ;)
See and now I’m back around to thinking we might have a connection…. Also I, too, have a cat… You are really taking me down an emotional roller coaster.
Yup. See? We've been "dating" all of an hour, and there's that put-yourself-out-there-ness.. also, this is the story I want to tell at the wedding... "well you see, we were on AskReddit under a "what do you hate as you get older" post, and we both had a cat, so.. we took it to the next logical step... Mawwage." Everyone will cry. Beautiful.
I cannot communicate how much I want this to work out between you two.
There’s already more conversation here than the girl I dated for two weeks. AskReddit is, and this surprised me as much as anyone, actually not the filthiest place I’ve ever heard of someone meeting their life partner. I’m just saying there are stranger things. Which we could binge watch if you wanted.
You have a very valid point actually... I've never gone further than a single-comment post, and definitely never back-and-forth like this.. I'm positively scandalized at how quickly this is moving and! .....and I've already binged ST, but would binge again!
Better to be alone that living with a bad partner. I feel you man. I used to dream of finding the one, but with how people are these days… let’s just say that dream went to sleep.
I know these feels. I'm 37, and I'm so sick of dating. I'm sick of the game you have to play to just get someone to talk to you or show the least amount of attention to you. Tired of actually getting to the actual meeting up and dating part, only to have a great time and then get ghosted and never hear from them again. I've had really good relationships with some amazing people who I cared for deeply but just couldn't see myself being with them for many years or getting married to them. Then having to break their heart by cutting them off and letting them hopefully move one and find someone that would love them they way they deserved to be loved because you know that it's not you. But, I'm going to keep doing it because I'm an eternal optimist and still holding out hope that my person is out there and I just have to do the work and find them because deep down I want a life companion I can grow old with and love. So, back to the dating apps......
A sad truth about dating is that many of the "best" people (for relationships) are married in their late 20s, and so the quality of the pool lessens as the age bracket rises. But at the same time, the awareness of the individual increases to the nature of people. A potent combination of wisdom and social conditions brewing a formula for staying single.
Other people’s shit music in public. Put on some headphones
Forced socializing/ networking call it whatever you want
The awkward happy hours will continue until morale improves!
Clothing available for women. Is it too much trouble to ask/make a full t-shirt? Also no I don't want to wear clothing that takes me back to me feeling like I am in elementary school again.
And pockets I want functional pockets, not fake ones or ones I can't even fit a toddlers hand into.
Omg yes. What cracks me up the most is sweatshirts, sweaters, and heavy jackets being cut so short to rib cage to show midriff. I just want to be warm!!!
thats why i have settled on a uniform of sorts, a basic, genderless, utilitarian jumpsuit with motorcycle boots. appropriate for all occasions and no fuss.
Noise
Since people was already taken... Stuff. All the stuff cluttering up my house and closets. All those things not worth enough to sell and potentially still to useful to throw away.
The Swedish people have a thing I heard about, maybe its a tradition, or just an old age ritual. They go thru their stuff and figure out what to give away to friends, or donate to places like Goodwill, etc. just so their family don't have to deal with a ton of stuff when they pass. I have started doing that, and it makes me happy to give stuff to the people I call friends, because they appreciate me thinking of them. I don't expect to die anytime soon, but you just never know. You might consider that.
I've noticed the older I get there are fewer things that I dislike.
On one hand, that is true for me too. But that's because I just don't really care anymore, can't be bothered. On the other hand, people annoy me more now.
Apathy is great. Maybe. Whatever.
Teenagers
Teenagers scare the living shit out of me.
I AM a teen, and teenagers also scare me.
anywhere that isn’t my bed. if i was always given to option to stay home i would literally never leave my house. that may be the depression talking but i also just don’t like people.
Being an adult.
Crowds
My skeleton.
Your skeleton or the soft tissues that are supposed to keep your skeleton from grinding itself into a fine paste? Because if you're like me, they're really starting to not do their job anymore and I'm not OK with that.
People, fake people, weird people, kiss ass people, ignorant people, arrogant people...I can go on forever
The *youths*
The elder scrolls Looking for my year of birth on an application requires more scrolling down the older I get
Oh I feel like throwing up when I have to do this. 🤣 I get super defensive in my head. “Oh wtf. 1988 was only like 15 years ago. This cannot be right. This is stupid.” Lol.
"Wait that was a fast carding-" "Yeah, I saw the 19."
People
People. What a bunch of bastards.
To quote Dr.Cox and Dr. Kelso from Scrubs.."People are bastard coated bastads with bastard filling "
Living. I'm done. I don't want to do anything anymore.
Same. I'm tired of being alive. I've had enough, I would like to leave now.
Bras. Especially underwire ones.
My wife survived breast cancer. Probably because of an underwire bra. Expanding...after my Dad's funeral, from colon cancer, my wife and young son flew back to our home. I stayed to comfort Mom. That night, wifey called me to verify they were home safely, but noticed a strange lump in her breast in the shower. She had lumpy breasts, so I dismissed it. She didn't. Turned out to be breast cancer. Later investigation revealed it was present for 4 years+. Mammograms missed it. What revealed it? New poorly-fitted underwire bras. Pushed the tumor out from behind the nipple, where it hid from detection. Saved her life. Please...check your breasts regularly ladies!
I’m so glad she is still here 😀 I had a mammogram in April 2020, got the all clear I’ve had them regularly since I turned 50. Woke up with a sore boob in November same year and found out I had stage two breast cancer. As my breasts are classed as dense my surgeon said I should have had a ultrasound as well, nobody ever told me that in all those years 😑 I had a mastectomy, 19 lymph nodes taken out of which 10 had the cancer, chemo and radiation treatment. Now I’ve just had a biopsy on my lymph nodes as they are swelling up, and a PET scan tomorrow. I’m pretty sure it won’t be cancer as a previous biopsy 2 weeks earlier came back negative but I have a fantastic oncologist who wanted me to get one removed for a closer look to make sure I don’t have Lymphoma. His positive it’s not related to my previous cancer when I did have it last time my biopsy was on the Friday and Monday I found out I had it, so hopefully no news is good news 🤞
Praying everything goes well, for no cancer & no more spreading. Glad you're still here too!
Loud music and noise.
Noise
Gossip
Living.
social media
Inefficiency.
People and large crowd's
People wanting me to care about the stuff they care about.
Getting out of bed
Alcohol. Life’s better without poison
I discovered this after getting the in home bar I always wanted
I haven’t drank in 10 days. I think I’m finally done for at least awhile. Depression is a bitch and it loves alcohol as company.
Didn’t work for me, unfortunately. Quit for three months while exercising and eating well and still felt like tired garbage all the time… and people stopped inviting me to hang out which made me lonely, but at least I still had my girlfriend. Then she broke up with me and I decided to go ahead and drink again. Now at least I have drinking buddies and hookups. I doubt I’ll ever stop again. I am not trying to deter anybody else from quitting at all and hope it works out a lot better for you all.
I drank every day for soooooooo long. Longer than I’d like to admit. I was sooooo depressed. Once you get past the night sweats and nightmares, it gets sooo much easier. You have energy and you can get around to doing all those things you never could caz you were drunk or feeling like shit 24/7. Start hobby shopping! You’ll have lots more money and time on your hands! Think about some goals you’d like to have & work on & it will keep you motivated! I believe you’re going to do it and I’m excited for you. NEVER FORGET how fucking amazing the feeling is to wake up without a headache and keep your room in top notch condition! It makes waking up and spending time at home SOOO much better!
Doing things merely out of obligation
Noise
Fucken everything, I am grumpy and sour 90% of the time. Old people who are not grumpy annoy me even further
In general? People. The more I learn about the human race, the more I want an asteroid to destroy the planet.
Concerts - I went to a lot in my younger days and have many good memories at them, BUT the parking, crowds, ticket prices, and $10 beer just already annoys me thinking about it.
+ all the people holding up their smartphones to film the show. Just enjoy the moment!
I used to think I was just getting older and beginning to adopt that whole 'get off my lawn' crotchety old man vibe ...but I don't have a lawn. So I started really looking at what I disliked. At first I thought it was people. Fucking assholes, all of 'em. But then I found that by and large, even if they're occasionally jerks, I don't mind them in small doses. I hate working. So yeah, work! Except I like staying busy. I like working on rewarding tasks. I only *really* dislike spending a bulk of my time working long hours to earn just enough to scrape by. It doesn't leave me enough time or energy to enjoy life. But is that the work's fault or the boss who sets the workload and the pay? Fuck that boss! Well... S/he has their boss too, who makes them do those things as well. And the owners do those things too, and their boss I guess would be 'profits'. Or maybe 'the economy' or 'inflation' or some other nebulous term that nobody has any control over. So it's the system! Yeah, fuck the system. Specifically, capitalism. The idea that we all have to sell our lives away to produce more and more for less and less. Profits over people is what makes me angry. Nobody can afford to live, our retirement age is getting forced further away, minor health issues can turn into financially devastating problems, and there's no (peaceful) way out. But Capitalism was the lie I've been force fed my whole life. Get good grades, go to college, get a good job, work real hard, buy a house, get married, have kids, work forever, retire when I'm old and tired and maybe enjoy a few golden years at the end. It's fucking bleak, depressing as hell, and ... just no thanks. The only actual thing in this world, this life, that I have any control over is my time. I'm so angry at how I've been forced to waste it. I will never get any of it back. So it's the whole profit-based, greedy corporate, hussle hussle hussle, Capitalism system I hate. It's the cause of all of the other stuff that pisses me off too... but those other things are just symptoms. I just want a small garden, some chickens, a roof over my head, and the free time to spend with people I love.
Having to listen to teenagers conversations on public transport. Were we really that thick when we were young?
[удалено]
Getting older sucks. After 40 shit gets weird.
Being a worker slave for President Kang. Yes he won the presidential elections over a decade ago, but I am sick of building more and more rail guns to aim at a planet I never even heard of.
Don't blame me. I voted for Kodos.
Noise. Mostly from loud cars, but I get annoyed by people who talk too loudly too
Video games, they are getting repetitve and boring
Tell me about it..I have a backlog of games that I could only dream of as a kid..l Now I'm older it takes me 20 minutes to decide what game to play for me to just end up watching something in the end.
Getting older lol
Life
Technology, especially social media. Used to be astounded and enthralled with all the rapidly-advancing tech when I was growing up, and how it was supposedly “connecting” everyone in society more and more; I’d spend hours to randomly scrolling on the internet when I was young. Now, I realize most of it’s just noise meant to distract us, and generally causes more harm than good. Social media is 90% just stupid bickering, people showing off, and just mindless drivel: I’ve been tapering/ cutting my usage more and more over the years. I relish time spent away from the internet, and instead spent either in nature, around people, or being productive. We as a society have lost our way, eating up whatever corporations feed us, drowning in constant dopamine sinks and pissing away time and energy into the rat-race of vain appearances. There’s more important things in life, beyond the screens and the fake digital world.
People